Ryan Hamilton Stand-Up 05/12/14 | CONAN on TBS

[Music] alright alright hi should we start with my face I always look like this and I look really happy all the time I am well aware that I look just ecstatic constantly and I don't feel like this I really don't I feel I feel okay I feel fine and I look crazy happy I don't I don't even buy it really I I wake up in the morning and I look in the mirror and I go that is inaccurate I don't know what you want me to do I just walk around people go look at that chip or fella and I go I'm okay I feel like I look more like a comedy club logo than I do a comedian like oh yeah I could be a sign in 1953 that's the kind of life I could sell ice cream in the 50s I can't go places I can't just show up at a funeral you know I guess I'm so sorry for your loss I uh I can't ask a girl out you know what are you doing tomorrow it's just so creepy isn't it I'm single and I'm trying not to be single which sounds desperate really you shouldn't you shouldn't say that out loud it's true but there's no woman in earshot of that statement going that's the one dibs on that smiley desperate fella but it's really I mean part of your single life is great you've got all this freedom you can do whatever you want whenever you want right maybe someone wanders into your life maybe not you don't care it's just it's a great place to be I'm not there anymore I mean freedom is amazing but I'm not popping up alone in bed in the middle of the night going I can do whatever I want you know we're not rolling around in bed on look at the freedom I'm not brave Harding in bed at 3:00 I am you understand I'm not watching infomercials and eating a Lean Cuisine because I'm living life in my terms ah you're the only people I've talked to today no I'm not very good socially this is all I do I just do this and go home and think of things to tell strangers tomorrow I don't drink I think that's part of it it's it's tough to be social when you don't drink because you don't want me around you know like some nights it's fine but many nights I get this feeling back from the group like we all got together and we realized you're going to remember most of this so we'd like for you to go home now what you don't think about is it goes both ways you're drinking affects my life do you ever nobody ever thinks about that but it's true because I'm a good listener you know so I listen and I listen and I listen I'm fine with that really I'm okay with that what I'm not okay with is the next day when I end up alone in a park waiting for a picnic there is no picnic it's just I'm just alone on a blanket with baby carrots and cheese cubes waiting for someone with a five digit phone number to try and call now you don't get that kind of detail in a joke unless you've actually lived [Applause]

Channel: Team Coco

Views: 731,865

Keywords: Conan, Conan (TV Series), Conan O'Brien, Ryan Hamilton, Stand-Up, TBS (TV Channel), Team Coco, andy richter, best moments of conan, celebrity interview, coco, comedy, conan best, conan best moments, conan brien, conan classic, conan funny interviews, conan funny moments, conan o'brian, conan obrien interview, conan obrien podcast, conan on tbs, conan remotes, funny, funny moments on conan, late night show, official, talk show, talk show hosts, tbs, teamcoco, top 10 conan

Id: T8OTlsfCDt8

Length: 4min 35sec (275 seconds)

Published: Tue May 13 2014