r/ProRevenge - He drank my "milk"...

what's up guys welcome to daily dose of Reddit this is your host Zach and today subreddit is our slash petty revenge this story's called builders dump stuff in front of my office door builders lunch now paints the walls I work alone in a small office in a public building that is undergoing some renovations while it's closed to the public there's an office space in front of my office that is usually unoccupied think of an office space with a manager's office attached at the end I just rent the manager's office building managers were supposed to notify us if they ever intended to rent out the space in front of my office so we could build a temporary wall or something so I didn't need to walk through someone else's office to get to mine but I guess they thought they didn't need to do this because the builders are only there temporarily so now the space is occupied by the site office for construction I'm slightly annoyed at the building management for not notifying me of this but I'm Way more annoyed at the builders because the space has turned into a dumping ground to get to my office I have to walk past light fixtures tool bags random chairs in the walkway and a toilet bowl and I have to listen to builders talking crap while twelve of them sit in a room fit for five having lunch it's like a teenager's bedroom but instead of clothes and stale socks the floor is covered in building materials and tools I ask them to keep it clean as it's the walkway to my office and not a storeroom and they say sure but basically roll their eyes at me and do nothing so I took some pictures of the mess and reported it to building management and one week later they tidied up slightly we cleaned up a bit round here for you might now need to thank us as I walked in that morning a few hours later and it was almost worse than it was before to the point I couldn't leave my office without moving four boxes of supplies out from direct in front of the door yesterday I also hear them whispering about how I'm such a cooter and a stuck-up public servant I'm private sector but whatever cut to today I go to step out to get a coffee and before I open the door I look through the window of the door to see someone's half-eaten spaghetti sitting on the floor right in front of the doorway I lose my composure for a moment and say screw it open the door and trip on the bowl of spaghetti causing it to spray all over the room and the two builders in the room spaghetti gets on everything sauce on their computers noodles in the bloody toilet bowl it's in the carpet and most impressively all over the builders they start to shout at me but I get just as mad saying who the hell puts a bowl of spaghetti on the floor in front of a door I kind of snapped at this point and started lambasted them which is very out of character for me I told them this is an office not a storeroom and you're worse than my teenage nephew and told them to clean their crap up or I'll start kicking everything aside that's in the path delicate or not they sheepishly say yes and I go get my coffee when I return no one is in the office and the mess is still on everything I think that wipe the laptops down but I don't care at this point and retreat into my office and focus on work fast forward a few hours and I get an email from the building management i crack a huge smile as I read an email basically saying the builders reported your conduct and HUD has come inspect the damage however we notice the unacceptable amounts of mess in the office space had not been cleared up in the last time we asked them to and they mated the food was placed on the floor in front from the doorway so we expect them to clean up the mess paying for cleaning and place no blame on you in this case everything mess comes back call us directly as they are on their last warning from a few other instance in the building it was a longer and more official email but you get point so now I'm occasionally looking through the door while the builders crawl around on their hands and knees scrubbing spaghetti out of the carpet I'm not proud of losing my cool and handling things the way I did but I won't deny that it worked and it felt really good my nose is stuffy but besides that that's some good good revenge I guess tripping on their spaghetti it got results though so I gotta give you some credit there buddy this story's called forget your neck strap have mine this happened last marching band season my high school band director likes to invite middle schoolers to be in the marching band even though they'd only be there for after school practice and this is where fish kid came in we called this eighth grader fish kid because he was an annoying brat who absolutely did not want to be there he also looked like a goldfish from Petsmart he would go hide in the bathroom and play fort night instead of actually playing called his parents to come get him early acted like his alto saxophone was broke and always forgot his next draft one day we were marching down to the field and guess what fish kid forgot his neck strap again so I came up with a masterful plan now fish kid plays an alto saxophone they are pretty small in light weight I play a baritone saxophone 20 plus pounds and giant I basically make him use my neck strap because I'm his section leader he has to listen to me and I proceed to march the whole ten minutes show without a neck strap supporting the weight of that baritone sax on just my thumb was pretty painful but not unbearable however I made sure I had a face full of pain in agony the whole time I marched and made sure he saw I over exaggerated everything I was feeling to make him feel like he was gonna cause me to break my thumb or something and just to teach him about what carrying his own neck strap after the first run he tried to give me my neck strap back but I refused we ran the show again and I made my acting performance even better this time after we ran the show twice we had a break during the break fish kid apologized profusely that he forgot his gave my neck strap back and said he would never forget it again and he did it I went and talked to my band director and drum major afterwards they were concerned for me also but after I told them the whole story they chuckled the best part no one else noticed but my section and fish kid so now it's like a band Orban legend been kids am i right this story's called dad's colleague has enough of being phoned by conservatory companies so gets petty if you lived in the UK during the early 2000s you probably experienced an influx of calls from companies trying to sell you a conservatory I don't know if it's still a thing but back then you'd sometimes get three to four a week you'd get the hard line pushy sales team trying to get that free quote meeting out of you honestly it was like the pp I think and annoying my dad's friend Toni lived in a second floor flat and used to get these calls regularly one company in particular Hughes to call him pretty much weekly trying to sell him a conservatory eventually Toni had enough and accepted the excited sales reps offer to come out on the day of the meeting Toni met him on the street outside and when the sales rep got out casually pointed to his second-floor window and said so what taught music would be good for Denon get plenty of Shaun the sales rep gets really pissed and asked if he was joking after Toni invited him to come up to prove he wasn't the sales rep started shouting that he'd had his precious time wasted and other customers were waiting Toni casually said well you phoned me and went back inside leaving the sales rep to burn in a temper out of there he still got calls but never from that company again you know what that's a pretty cool story and it's very inspiring to those who constantly have to deal with sales spam call crap things all the time oh my god so many calls every frickin week this story's called steal my milk drink my piss after going to rehab I lived in a move-on house basically the second stage of recovery housing people came and went but it generally was a good community of six or seven of us anyway I soon noticed my drinks were going down milk coffee etc I knew who it was he was a scumbag no one really liked him he took liberties and was a bit of a Richard so one night I went downstairs and pissed in my milk maybe about a pint of wee and four pint carton of milk I also put gravy and salt into my instant coffee and left it there and went about my business after taking all the storable food up to my room time went by and no one said anything but the milk went down oh it went down so so much and every time it did I felt a warm glow fast-forward a few years and I met this guy's mate who also lived with us we were talking and he said in a joking way obviously meant as a way to talk down to me yeah thanks for all the milk I replied my pleasure do you know for the last three months I was pissing in the milk he stopped his face dropped and I laughed and said something like oh god yes so much piss so so much piss and laughed he went very silent and I walked away from that conversation feeling smug and not ashamed to say wonderful he starts being all attitude he one day say you asked him who pissed in your Cheerios this story's called thanks for the great teaching materials guys have fun using them the short background I work for an education company providing supplementary classes to rich kids I just quit after two and a half years two weeks ago my company asked me to deliver a history course no problem says I I haven't taught history in a while so I'll need some time to prepare the course but otherwise sure happy to don't worry says my company we have prepared the material for you you just need to teach the class it starts tomorrow thanks for an occasion under consider the game so I look at the material it couldn't be more useless just a couple of pages photocopied from some random Billy aged five guide to history book random crap picked up with no coherence I'm screwed I then spent the next few nights making a complete two-week course on world war two planning the course as I teach it the plan involved going through all theatres and major events of the war from start to finish lots of interactive maps I made on Blender video clips from movies lesson plans etc quite proud of the result it's only a two week course so I can have a good beginning middle and end I completed the course on Friday coincidentally my last day at the company kids are happy I'm happy well done everyone just got a message from the company on Sunday night just now asking me for the material for the third week the third week of a two week course now that I have left they want to keep the course running because it went so well so I sent their random text book pages back to them you're welcome well you know what I appreciate all the effort you went through for those kids so yeah screw those guys you don't need them this story's called give me the silent treatment for something out of my control I'll ruin your birthday and make you question your manhood my ex-boss was not a good person he was controlling egotistical quick to anger a womanizer and hated depending on anyone because that would mean he isn't in control boss ran a sports program which grew from 600 to 1,000 over my time working there and had hired me to run the office and had the children's program due to my experience working with larger programs in the same sport children make up about 80% of the program boss thought he was too good to mix with most of his clients or their families he mixed mainly with the adults particularly the attractive female ones and never answer the phone or general emails so pretty much everyone knew contact pepper for everything so one day an email gets sent directly to him addressed to pepper and boss he didn't talk to me for the rest of the day I tried to talk to him email him and get answers I needed for his business and he was ignoring me I thought I was going mad as he had never done this before and I'm fairly soft-spoken at work did he just not hear me while I was 5 feet away the next day I asked him a question and he responded with don't you know I mean you're so important that people address emails to you first I was fuming like are you seriously willing to jeopardize your business and clients because of a literal nothing treating me like crap all because your ego can't handle it no not gonna let that stand one last thing boss is turning 50 soon I was 26 to 27 at the time and he had vaguely come on to me before Gress but it never went anywhere I knew he was feeling insecure about getting older and was questioning was he's still a man still strong and virile would he still have it for the ladies I knew it had to be done we are talking and dimension I know his birthday is coming up soon how old would he be fifty Wow a milestone my mom turned 50 a few years ago and it was quite an affair then I dropped this the Devastator you're only a few years younger than her huh I guess that means you're old enough to be my father he immediately clammed up he didn't speak to me for the rest of the day and didn't come in for the next two checkmate this was almost five to seven years ago I found the best way to ask innocent questions and or act like you're observing out loud without malice when actually that's what you're doing honestly this seems like a TV show sort of dynamic I dig it I really do this story's called it's a funeral not x-factor various edits I made a great many spelling mistakes so this isn't really a massive revenge but it takes place at my great grandmother's funeral Vera it's one of my fondest memories huh all the names in this story will be faked this story takes place in 2016 so my great aunt Karen is absolutely horrible she brags about how stingy she is she paid for her daughter's wedding the altar was on wheels and tries constantly to bring others down she was always horrible to Vera when she was alive and when she died let's say she died at 8 the house was cleared out at 9 on the market at 10 and the first viewing was booked for 11:30 at Vera's funeral which she planned she refused to let my mother sing which was odd because she wanted my cousin her grandson to do a reading the day of the funeral he said he didn't want to read and always well here comes the revenge now my family are all trained singers this includes grand dad mom dad bro and me during the hymns we were all singing quietly out of respect for everyone but along comes Aaron she takes it upon herself to attempt to sing louder than us we can all hear her off-key caterwauling we all shared a look and gradually began to crescendo now Karen didn't notice this at first but as she did she began to get louder perfect we prepared for this exact situation we'd learned all the hymns all the harmonies and in a sense to them as well we suddenly burst out full volume in four-part harmony she looked back at us in shock then continued to try and out sing us bless her she didn't stand a chance against three classically trained singers and two ex church choir boys suffice to say it was a fun funeral I've got very mixed feelings about this one don't forget to Like subscribe and hit that Bell to never miss an episode [Music]

Channel: Daily Dose Of Reddit

Views: 20,122

Rating: 4.9427314 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit funny, daily dose of reddit, daily dose of internet, daily dose of memes

Id: 47lle6YEwkc

Length: 18min 40sec (1120 seconds)

Published: Thu Jul 16 2020