r/maliciouscompliance | The Approver at the Bank didn't like my change...

hello everybody hope you're all doing well my name is steven and this is the story time channel today we have some malicious compliance stories and our first story of the day is by not just one tale accepting exceptions without exception i currently work for a very large bank that has footholds in multiple continents one of my job duties is to ensure that the software we use is up to date with patches and vendor-specified configs anything not up-to-date we have an exception process to ensure it gets caught up or an approved reason for it not to be for an interim period there are no permanent exceptions we had a vendor software that was still utilizing tls version 1.0 obviously that's a no-no the software update was dependent on a homebrew software that itself needed to be updated to utilize tls version 1.2 i was tasked with creating a three-month exception to enable the vendor software to use tls version 1.2 with the interim period being the time it took for the homebrew software to be recoded tested and deployed the time clock on the exception did not start until the exception was fully approved but submission of an exception meant we would stop getting flagged and ultimately stop landing on upper management's naughty list if an exception was in flight toward being approved i submitted the exception as required immediately one of the reviewers contacted me and asked me to change the wording for the exception description to include the vulnerabilities and using tls version 1.0 all of them i asked he responded in the affirmative two days worth of research later the updated description included all the tls version 1.0 vulnerabilities known to man that would fit in the limited description text box direct from the cve website amazingly this passed with the reviewers approval but wait there's more a week later a second level approver had to review and determined that the description was too wordy and requested that i remove all but the relevant reasons for the exception and update the affected system type to include databases so i dutifully did the exception was resubmitted with the descriptions trimmed down the first approver immediately contacted me and asked why i changed the description because he wasn't going to approve it again without the text he required he also took issue with the system type change because the software didn't actually run on databases the databases were a downstream component recall that as long as i have submitted the exception we have no more visibility in upper management which means my manager is happy her manager is happy everyone is happy hence i changed it back and resubmitted a week later i get a phone call from the second approver asking why i have not done what he asked i tell them that i did in fact do so and resubmitted but that the first approver told me to re-add it back second approver sighed audibly in the phone and told me to just update the system type to include databases and that he'll approve it and it will go to final approval in the system updating the system type apparently did not trigger a resend to the first approver so everyone would be happy two weeks later i get an email from the final system approver exception is re-handed back to me due to wordiness in the description the fact that the system type included systems that were not directly impacted and that all my dates were off by a month so i needed to fix all issues and resubmit the entire effort for approval i updated the dates remediated everything requested and resubmitted three days later the first approver again contacted me i responded by forwarding the email from the final system approver cc the second level approver and final system approver and told them that they all needed to get in a room and hash it out and let me know what they come up with a day later the first approver sent me a quick one-liner that said change it all to what system approver specified i changed it and removed a month from my timeline because we're already a month into the exception submission process but the coders have been diligently working the entire time neither first or second approver said a word the system approver however kicked it back to me asking why the dates are now 60 days out instead of the original 90. so let me ask you guys what do you think is the true problem here is it the employees first approver second approver final system approver or is it the system that the company has set where you have to pass three individual reviews by three individual people with seemingly no real intermingling between all the reviewers unless you solely put in the work to make sure that they are collaborating so employees or company system let me know what the problem is in the comments down below our next story is by dv email shut up and let you sell well okay then i work in a high-tech industry providing network security products to the fortune 100. think of apple facebook salesforce etc my job is as a sales engineer which is to work with the direct sales rep and make sure that the solution presented is correct solves the problem and fits the customer's business needs the job of the sales rep is to manage the relationship and to guide the sale through the qualification to purchase process it's not their job to be the engineer on the account that's my job the two of us go into the account together and work face to face with the customer teams often this begins at the c level like chief technology officer and then works its way down to the department teams security team network team i.t team procurement legal etc i have been doing this job for a long long time and i'm good at it i get glowing reviews from my customers because i work really hard to make sure i understand their issues and to make sure that the technology fits their need at a prior company who shall remain nameless i worked with a handful of really recognizable accounts that i won't name here i had been at the company for over four years and i was very successful at it a new sales rep was brought in with the expectation that he would begin with smaller accounts in order to learn the products and get his feet wet with relatively low risk customers in the matter of a few months he went through two of my peers who didn't want to work with him anymore he was making sales but they weren't happy with him and requested to be moved to a different rap normally i would not work on smaller accounts since i was a senior person in my role but my boss asked me to work with the guy and see if i couldn't find the problem normally the way a sales call worked is that the rep we'll call him mr arrogant would open the meeting introduce people propose an agenda for the meeting provide marketing material if appropriate and then introduce me so that i could ask the customer about their needs and goals and then i'd begin to work with them through a technical presentation that was the way it was supposed to work for all the reps the really experienced guys could do most of a technical presentation but anytime the client got down to the nitty gritty details they would always turn it over to the engineer it's the entire reason that we went on the sales calls to keep the rep out of trouble it was never the job of the salesperson to do the technical portion of the sale never so mr arrogant and i go off to our first sales call together as we write over in his car we talk about the customer the kind of business they're in and possibly what products they might need this is all pure speculation we don't know the customer's problem yet let alone their network or environment i volunteer that i've worked with this customer in the past and i am comfortable with their environment but it might have changed as we're writing in the car he says to me okay op i know all i need now when we go in let me do all the talking he's been with the company for a month or two i tell him gently that this is a bad idea and he should do his job and i'll do mine he's having absolutely none of that mr arrogant tells me in completely clear terms that this account is his account not mine and he will not let me in the room unless i let him sell he knows more than i do and i should sit back and learn from him i try gently several times to get him to let me do my job absolutely not so i text my manager while we're sitting in the customer lobby with the description of the situation my manager texts back something to the effect of mr arrogant believes he can do your job let him try so cut to the meeting mr customer has the head of security the head of network and the head of it all in the conference room mr arrogant begins his marketing pitch he doesn't ask any questions he pivots over into his product pitch telling them that they need really expensive product one and really expensive product two oh and they need a three year support plan and a bunch of custom coding to make it all work the room is completely silent when he finishes after a long moment the chief technical officer turns to me and says something like so ob you agree with this mr arrogant leaps in and says of course he does i stare at the cto silently the cto says i'd like to hear what lp has to say if you like mr arrogant you can wait outside mr arrogant shuts up i say actually mr cto i have no idea if your environment has changed what your technology looks like now or anything but i guarantee you that you absolutely do not need product one and two you might need product three or four but i need to learn a lot more about your current situation mr cto turns to mr arrogant yeah why don't you wait in the lobby i don't think you're the right person to handle our account i'll reach out to your management team this afternoon and see if someone else might be available mr arrogan sputters and then leaves in a huff needless to say i needed a lift back to the office when the meeting ended but no one ever had to work with mr arrogant ever again as far as i know his desk was empty the very next week yeah mr arrogance seemed cocky overconfident and honestly shady trying to sell up all these things that they obviously don't need nobody likes any company that tries to upsell them on underhanded business stuff so i'm glad op did what they did and our final story of the day is by mckenna m you want to do your job now i will hold you to it setting the stage this story takes place in the summer of 2020. i joined my bf on a camping trip to the woods planning to relax while he worked we both work in tree removal but i didn't have a current project i accidentally got a job as admin support for my bf's boss after hanging around the office one day and giving excel tips he didn't know what control plus f did at first i helped with building spreadsheets reports and sending emails for him every day he asked a new task of me and every day i did it well eventually i had developed a schedule and even included running programs to check for mistakes while i took calls to increase productivity my boss owner of the company decided he had nothing to do with me there so he went home different state and time zone and i ran things there was about three months of this i wouldn't really hear from him except for the occasional how much money did we make this week or has anyone told you you're doing a great job i'm a very modest person so believe me when i say i was great at this job nothing got by me i kept everything organized and always knew where to find any kind of information that i needed a few weeks into the fourth month my boss came back and brought his family his wife would hang around the office and watch me like a hawk if i took too long of bathroom breaks or doodled while on conference calls she would tell me that i was on company time and honestly i didn't mind too much she was very nice a lot of the time and i'm pretty easy going during a stand down my bf and i went home and were having dinner with his family when my boss's wife called she was angry from the start of the call where's x employee's paperwork i told her it was scanned and in the locked folders in our company files walked her calmly through how to find it she then yelled at me for not organizing files like i said i always knew exactly where everything was everything she asked for i told her where to find just off the top of my head she demanded that due to my incompetence she wanted to organize all files from now on because that was her job and this was her company i was a bit upset but didn't let her know and apologized for any mistakes remember she and her husband had not been present or in much contact for months malicious compliance following this call every file paper scrap receipt etc that needed filing i sent her in an email stating that it needed filing she eventually told me i didn't need to send her everything and to just file it but i let her know that due to my history of incompetence i didn't want to jeopardize the company or create issues by misfiling and that it was important to me that she did her job so she could be present in her company she hated filing i don't know why she did what she did but i never let her get out of that hole she dug i don't know maybe she was jealous of op for doing such a good job i just think they got irrationally upset maybe entitled i don't know ugh we handed the reins to this one person to run the entire company for months on end without any or little contact at all and now everything isn't exactly the way i left it that's literally what they're complaining about you kind of realized pretty quickly how ridiculous it was but with that being said that's all the time we have for today so if you have a favorite story of the day let me know which story and why in the comments down below but besides that if you enjoyed the video please consider giving it a like and if you haven't subscribe and turn notifications on so you'll never miss an upcoming video no matter what you do whether it's just viewing the video liking subscribing turning notifications on i appreciate the heck out of it every little thing that you do helps the channel grow that much more and i can't thank you enough for it so until next time i hope you all have a wonderful day and i'll be right here next time on the story time channel

Channel: Storytime

Views: 25,260

Rating: 4.9252338 out of 5

Keywords: storytime, r/maliciouscompliance, r/malicious compliance, maliciouscompliance, malicious compliance, reddit malicious compliance, Storytime malicious compliance, reddit stories, funny reddit, best of reddit, rslash maliciouscompliance, malicious compliance reddit, top posts reddit, malicious compliance stories, malicious compliance video, r/ maliciouscompliance, r/ maliciouscompliance Storytime, Storytime r/maliciouscompliance, funny reddit stories, malicious compliance posts

Id: HM5YsnZRWYs

Length: 15min 58sec (958 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 23 2020