r/IDOWorkHereLady - Ma'am, I'm Not The Manager, But I AM The Owner!

welcome to our slash I do work here lady where we share stories about employees that are mistaken for customers thank you to all subscribers who support the channel it means a lot for me today we have three good stories and the first story is we aren't trying to hack you we're the guys that build your computers I don't know if this is the right sub for this but here we go so my friend and I work for a tech support company we're a retailer for one of the most popular point-of-sales software Suites in the country we also dabble in all of the hardware and peripherals that go with it both my friend and I our system analysts he specializes in databases and menus I focus on integration which usually comes down to making sure whatever stupid bean-counting program the client uses to track their sales internally works with are equally janky software yay both of us have plenty of experience in computer science networking and cyber security so it's been a long long day and we both had to stay late due to one fire or another it's 3:00 in the morning and we decide the best course of action is breakfast or dinner we head to a local diner that just so happens to be one of our clients they don't get their tech support through us but we sell them hardware we being nerds and lacking basic people skills don't notice that we're the only customers in the place they are dead we get coffee and breakfast and dinner just a couple of fat nerds enjoying the fruits of our labors that's when my friend notices something mounted to the ceiling behind me is a wireless access point I didn't know they had customer Wi-Fi he says it turns out they don't the only Wi-Fi available is listed as diner three P D the three p d stands for third-party delivery meaning that it is the Wi-Fi used to make their grub hub or door - tablet work or whatever third party delivery company they use the Wi-Fi is also not password protected quickly for getting ourselves my friend and I set to work after gaining access to the Wi-Fi through my phone I poke and prod and find out that the Wi-Fi is plugged into their switch this means that it is behind all of their security and basically is a backdoor into their computer system the two of us get about as animated as fat nerds are prone to do and begin throwing jargon around as we analyze and prod at the stores network we find their office computer and sooner just one password away from their internal documents the store is horrendously unsecured after confirming our suspicions we discuss and my friend says the phrase that triggers this whole situation okay how would you do it how would you rob this place I start off on a long and elaborate plan involving a Raspberry Pi some batteries in a woman's purse any person versed in cybersecurity would be laughing at the two of us by this point however the general manager for the diner was not well versed in cybersecurity we hadn't noticed but our waitress had gone into the kitchen to do dishes and the GM was now our waiter he never said anything to us what was on top of those drink refills my friend and I compared ideas for stealing from the place and then go and estimate how valuable a diner like this would be to rob in terms of credit card numbers and employee identities all parts of this discussion basic and silly but the GM here is scary words like dark web Bitcoin blockchain and others such so he grabs a notepad and begins to write things down so the store GM had written down as much of our conversation as he was able to and despite miss hearing some of the jargon he does a decent job of writing down both of our plans for robbing the diner he then calls the stores internal IT company and tells them what we're saying the IT guy who takes their phone call is relatively new and tells the GM to call 911 once again my friend and I are more concerned with our food than our surroundings close to ten minutes later two cops show up they sit along near us separated by a divider and coffee just materializes silently at their table they then just look at each other and quietly sip the magically appearing coffee again my friend and I don't notice this finally we finish our meals pay and leave without being challenged the cops suggest that real hackers would not actually openly discuss their hacking plans in the restaurant they intend to rob they did however confirm that the stuff we were talking about sounded real so we weren't some kids trying to get on the news or such they suggest that we're from some software company or other similar entity no real threat there they will however make a report and do the basics to ensure we're not hurting anyone so during our discussion we do talk about our own company by name this is also reported to the diners corporate IT this in turn gets reported to our corporate office our corporate states that they don't know of any employees matching our description we work in a separate building so we don't have a lot of face-to-face interaction with our own administration and the hacking or counter hacking is not a service they provide now their company in ours believe that a pair of evildoers are going about masquerading as our text and trying to talk their way into people's offices a meeting is set up the next day the meeting happens and since both myself and my friend are the senior tech analysts on we're part of it it's a conference call with the diner's corporate IT team they explain the situation if there may be people pretending to work for us trying to get into our client systems the police have a report on the situation and there's a whole recording of the two people in question we all sit down in the evidence place and we end up staring at ourselves sitting at a table across from a pair of cops discussing how insecure the store is our entire side of the meeting starts laughing and my boss explains that those two fat nerds are not only employees but are sitting in on the meeting we both announced ourselves and apologized to everyone for causing such a scene the diner IT team is at a loss for words and finally we hear so you guys could steal from us that easily and that my friends is how we almost got arrested but instead landed a nice contract overhauling a restaurant chains internal security the second story is poor parking-garage behavior preps prospective employee for poor performance eval I used to work for a large state agency and after five years had become a middle manager my office was in the state office tower downtown and parking was scarce but middle management and up got reserved parking in the garage attached to our building this was a great perk since it's a cold state and on days that the tower garage is full you have to park at a private garage about a mile away and walk one day I had to run a few errands and pulled up to the garage a little later than usual by the time I had gotten there the sign on the garage said it was full but I had a badge that let me go in anyway and drive down into my reserved spot there was a man at the gate who was trying to get in despite the sign that it was full when I realized he didn't have a badge I backed up a little and honk my horn to let him know he could back up this infuriates him he gets out of his car and flips me off and hurls some few choice words my way as he backs up out of the spot I pull up to the gate and he yells some more words my way about how stupid I am and then I can't read that the garage is full I ignore him and assume he's just some guy there to have a meeting at one of the dozen or so agencies in our building and park my car I get to my desk and get an email from HR that one of the upper managers was sick and that I needed to cover down on some interviews interviews in our agency start with a group of prospective employees working on a small project together and then the candidates sit in front of a panel individually I walk into the room where all the candidates are sitting and there I see him parking jerk I was in my car so he didn't get a great look at me but I knew exactly who it was the candidates introduce themselves and get to work on their small project parking jerk was trying to control the entire process but they successfully completed the project as a team the panel then asks all the candidates to go sit in the hall while we discuss and we would call them in individually when we were ready once they were all out of the room I get Ali told my co-workers about my interaction with parking jerk and they died laughing we call him in first and began asking him basic employment questions he is otherwise a strong candidate but was very full of himself the rest of the panel goes first finally it's my turn me how do you react to stress PJ I handle it just fine I'm a very level-headed person me come on everyone gets a little flustered at some point PJ not me cool is the cucumber me so you never do anything like you get out of your car and yell at a stranger PJ silenced me or call them names and tell them to learn how to effing read PJ blood drains from his face me do you realize this job puts you in front of the media frequently and someone is always watching do you realize that if you were to work here your actions would reflect on not just you but they would reflect on your director the department as a whole and state government do you think that if you were in my position you would hire someone who behaved as rudely as you did PJ hangs his head in shame I think I may not be cut out for this position me that doesn't necessarily mean you're a bad person but you may not be ready for this job he was deflated I really think that this is the first time someone had held him accountable for his actions he did not get that job but a few years later I saw him working for another agency and by all accounts he sounded like he learned the third story is ma'am I am the owner I'll make this quick so I don't have to waste your time my great grandfather made a diner in a small town he was passed by generations and now I own the place i patrol the place daily I have two cashiers since this is diner and a chef he didn't even care he was more on doing his job first one of the cashiers was on her break and the other one was struggling with one line I helped her out by a lot and her colleague came back from her break she said she was sorry for using my time I replied it's fine a few minutes later the other cashier came for a break and now I had to do her job which was fine by me here comes the Karen and her very innocent and young daughter her daughter had nothing to do with this so she came into my diner she complained that the food was so long to deliver we didn't do deliveries she wanted to speak to the manager I came in my office took off my apron now she my nametag and the top of my name it said owner he was small I came back in my cashier was still doing her job the Karen looked really angry and told me where the manager was I told her ma'am the manager isn't here but you can talk to the owner she looked around and said with a confusing yet frowning face she asked where to where I replied in front of you I looked really intimidating for a joke she went really red her ears were the same color but her face was pink and ran away with her toddler following her my cashier came back while my other cashier was holding a breathtaking laughs and when the customers were done ordering and eating we came to our employees only room aka break / free food room all the seats were full so no customers for now I even heard other customers laugh my cashier who witnessed the whole thing laughed so hard her voice was heard outside the door we had CCTV cameras with audio we watched the whole footage it was three minutes long both of them laughed at the same time they came back to their spots in the day was normal again thanks for reading if you have any questions feel free to ask if you're gonna ask where my employees went when they had a break they go outside have some freedom or they can have free food from our diner another why didn't the chef come with you in the employees office he went on a break I gave him a footage and he had a little laugh if you have more questions feel free to ask in the comments and the last story is I'm not a student I'm actually a teach nope off to detention with you shout out to the people who were accused of being a student when they had already graduated I've recently started out as a teacher I was 27 when I had my first teaching job did some other stuff before and of course as the newbie not everyone working at that school knew me at the time I look a bit younger than my age and I usually wear a pair of jeans and a nice blouse or shirt I was working there for a bit over a month when I was walking through the hallways of the school during class hours picking up some paperwork and heading to the teachers room as I had a free period an older man I guess in his 40s stopped me looking kind of angry unknown man excuse me young lady where do you think you're going why aren't you in class me um I'm not actually a student but I'm a unknown man like heck you are I've seen you walking around with the older kids go to your class immediately me sir I'm really not a student but I'm actually a teacher I'm new here so you probably haven't seen me but unknown man stop your line go report to the office immediately I'll make sure your parents hear this and don't think I won't be looking for you in detention tomorrow me goes to the office as an needed to go there anyway to ask something and because this guy was way taller than me and looking really angry my colleagues in the office what happened to you me I got sent here because I was outside during class hours also could you call my parents because a man expects me in detention tomorrow my colleagues basically died of laughter right there and because there's usually more than one teacher keeping an eye out during detention unless I couldn't tell them who of the two males that were actually scheduled for detention the next day had given me detention they actually sent me to detention the next day you'll see in a bit why I took some grading work with me the unknown man who sent me to detention was looking smug as Sh when he saw me sitting in detention after a few minutes one of my colleagues from the office came in and in the most theatrical voice you can imagine introduced me as their new colleague and wasn't I a dear for coming into detention while busy grading papers in order to help them out with unruly students just roaming the hallways during class hours you should have seen the guy's face priceless for some reason he never sat at my table during lunch thank you for watching bye

Channel: /Start

Views: 73,761

Rating: 4.91394 out of 5

Keywords: reddit IDWHL, r/idontworkherelady, i dont work here lady storiers, reddit i dont work here lady, i dont work here, mistaken for employee, idwhl reddit, funny reddit stories, mistaken employee, i do work here lady, r/idoworkherelady, i don't work here lady, idontworkherelady, i don't work here, /start, r/, #idontworkherelady, idwhl, i do work here, idoworkherelady, r/IDOWorkHereLady manager, r/idoworkherelady owner, i am the owner, owner, manager, i know the owner, Owner of this Place

Id: 7-pEAFhilaI

Length: 12min 11sec (731 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 18 2020