r/IDontWorkHereLady - Karen Assaults an ARMY VETERAN! Cries for Cops When She's Hurt!

hello my wonderful beautiful friends guys welcome back to our slash i don't work here lady where karen's continue to mistake regular joeshmo customers as employees and in today's episode a karen makes a huge mistake by grabbing an army veteran yikes guys i hope you enjoy the other ridiculous stories as well and as always your story submissions can be sent to this email right here and listen for everybody who spams my emails saying fluff why aren't you reading my stories take a look at this this is how many unread emails i have to go through so yeah if you guys sent me stories just know that it's gonna take a while but i will get to it sooner or later okay i hope because that's a lot of reading okay so i'm quite short i'm just under five feet tall and most of the time i'm quite comfortable with my height but supermarkets are my bane so all too often i find things i need on the top shelf right where i maybe can tease them down with my fingertips standing on my toes if i'm lucky so usually i prefer not to risk tipping the whole shelf over and just ask the closest fellow shopper if they can get what i need now i've never ever had any problems those who are busy will just ignore me and those who have a moment will help but yesterday i run into a man who just had to turn it into a huge confrontation so yesterday i was looking at a pepper jar thinking if i can get it down myself or better look for help so the man comes right beside me and took a similar jar so before he moved away i asked him if he could get a second jar for me please at this the man immediately exploded that i'm too dumb and can't i see that he doesn't work here he's just shopping like i am now this man's rant lasted a couple of minutes insulting me and swearing at me i was so glad that i finally grew thicker skin as the man nearly drove me to tears before i got angry thankfully at this point another shopper comes past us and i turned to her ignoring the still ranting man and asked her if she would get the pepper for me she did and i thanked her i then turned to leave i think i heard the manchok mid-rant when i was leaving but i didn't look back so reading this post guys i can't help but think that this man read too many of these stories and was way too quick to think that opie was nothing but an entitled karen like either that or he's just sick and tired of short people always asking him for help so this person shares such an awesome comment and it says i'm relatively tall and i do get asked to get stuff off the top shelves fairly often by short people i don't get this guy's rant he's beyond rude now i will confess that sometimes i'll ask the person if they want me to grab it or to give them a boost which usually elicits a laugh and a just grab one type response so the one exception was a roughly four and a half foot tall woman probably in her late 60s who looks me in the eye and said make me fly with so much enthusiasm that i couldn't refuse she was light and she did a little plie jump thing when i lifted her up she then gracefully grabbed the jar she needed and landed softly she told me she'd been a ballerina and hadn't danced in years so the opportunity to be lifted like she still danced was too good to resist we chatted for a while since our shopping pattern overlapped and she was so nice guys that comment was so freaking wholesome right that i just had to share it with you not only did opie help that woman but they allowed her to relive a moment that made her feel young again and that's priceless alright so this happened a few years ago now i'm a disabled army veteran who also has ptsd i'm also hearing impaired and wear hearing aids so on this day i decide to go to wally world for a few items and i took my ptsd service dog with me i didn't have my hearing aids as they had gone in for repairs so i was pretty deaf it was hot in the store so i took off my coats and put it on my roller i also have a cane with me which i used to get items down from high shelves now unfortunately on this day i was wearing my favorite shirt it was a long-sleeved royal blue t-shirt with a neon green maori tiki goddess sitting in all her naked glory with her head tilted bug-eyed and sticking her tongue out something a wally world employee would never wear my hair was also in a ponytail i had taken off my disabled army veteran cap because i was hot so here i am going down the aisle slowly obviously because i'm disabled using my roller with my dog on my left side i'm also a high functioning autistic with a bit of ocd so i do tend to straighten out shelves as i go along no big deal right wrong now i'm doing my thing pretty deaf without my hearing aids when all of a sudden my dog turns around and starts to pull and i'm thinking huh then someone behind me pulls on my ponytail hard and almost knocks me over i react instinctively i haul back with a titanium plated elbow to the person's gut no thought just pure instinct then i grabbed my cane from the basket of my roller spun around and got into a defensive position at this point i had also pushed the 911 alert button around my neck and yelled that i had been assaulted told them location etc and 911 replied that cops were being dispatched so there she was getting up from the floor with a bloody nose a wild carrot so all of a sudden the karen screams help someone help i've been assaulted by an employee i then roared back at her in my drill sergeant voice and said what the f makes you think i work here i have a roller der and a service dog i don't work here you assaulted me so don't scream for help so right after i said this the woman goes you do work here i saw you straightening up the shelves i yelled back at her that doesn't mean i work here i have ocd i like to straighten up things so of course the karen wasn't listening though and she kept screaming at me saying quit lying you work here and you assaulted me i'm gonna get you fired and you will go to jail so while this is all happening my service dog is going crazy and barking i'm very upset my service dog is trying to calm me down and store employees and the manager and security come and shortly after that the police we then go to the store office and they put us in separate rooms the police review the tapes and one takes my statement the security and police finish reviewing the camera footage and asked me if i want to press charges i definitely say yes and karen gets upset by this she kicks the police and resists the rest i find out that this is not her first offense of harassing and assaulting customers and employees so she will serve some jail time in the end i get a 250 gift card from the store my service dog gets several bags of treats and i get profuse apologies from the store manager guys i always love the stories where entitled karen's just grab someone out of nowhere and they get exactly what's coming and people need to learn to stop doing that like that woman is so lucky that she only walked away with a bloody nose because you never ever ever know when someone's had a really bad day and they're thinking that's it the next person who touches me i'm gonna flip out and beat them into a pulp i don't care if i go to jail because you know blah blah blah blah and it always makes me shake my head so hard when they cry to everybody about being hurt after they physically grab and assault someone to begin with like grow up karen so on this day after work i walked to the bar to meet some friends for drinks now my bladder is a walnut so back and forth to the washroom regularly passed a party of four at a table now on the return of the first toilet run i hear something like come here you from some woman who looks like she just dipped her head in a bucket of makeup lack of manners do not dignify a response so i ignore it and just rock on the second go to the bathroom the psycho then grabs my arm squeezes her nails in and pulls me in close and she says something of the same while tapping the glass with her other hand's nails elegant i think she was imagining herself in reality she was just really damn aggressive and nasty so i say to her i don't work here lady the woman let's go and i walk away it's known in the bar that any waiter can serve any table they won't come to you you have to get their attention like she would have done to get the drinks of course i'm not a waiter but the woman seems determined now that it's gotta be me so third go to the toilet i catch a death glare and on my way back she kicks her bag under my feet to trip me up she sort of succeeds and then she snarls and says you better not have broke anything in my bag and then she asked me where her drinks are at this point i'm thinking fair game now so i say to her i'll be back in a moment and the drinks will be on the house and then back to my table i go out of line of sight with her thanks to a wall i'm now in my safe space away from crazy with booze and i'm thinking perfect so the place is quite dead i then hear a commotion a few minutes later kicking up so i tuned my ear in and it's none other than karen she's arguing with a manager and some waiter about not being served and wants the waiter to bring her free drinks like they promised or they'll leave now he was a soft tone speaker so i can't make out what he says only her loud obnoxious self a storm is brewing and i lie in wait or not i can't hold my pee any longer so i take a different route go pee walk back out of the washroom and then she notices me she's got a drink in her hand like she wanted to crush it to death like she was just awarded a trophy that required a death grip now i can tell the woman was on the lookout for me so i decide you know what outfit so i walk past their table with a great big stupid smile in real life i'm trolling her and she explodes the woman grabs a large ice jug from the table and she hurls it at my back shrieking in some trashy amazonian tribal display now at that the manager comes rushing and karen's screaming like a loon that she'll get what she wants the manager assesses the situation and some older woman states something like she just threw the jug at him for no reason and demanded him buy her a free drink close enough and even that makes her seem more looney tunes at this point the manager tells her to get out and that she's banned from the place and if she refuses to leave the police will be called the karen's now making threats that her boyfriends and yes she said boyfriends will be down to sort this out the manager asked her to confirm that she's making a physical threat grinding her teeth she stomps out the manager apologizes i tell him it's cool not his fault she was crazy etc etc and then he said can i get you and your friends around it's on the house in those first few sips i swear i could actually taste justice it had earthy tones with a hint of citrus with a faint odor of courtroom and elderflower yeah i would definitely consider that a win guys so reading all of these stories i think at that point i would have been super duper duper petty and i would have carried that karen and rolled on the ground screamed like i was dying and called for police that'll teach her okay but jokes aside a lot of the comments section isn't about how opie dealt with the entitled woman but everyone seems to be concerned about his frequent urination guys i'm pretty sure it's normal i don't know about you guys but when i drink a lot i pee like a racehorse okay i don't think it's anything to be concerned about so this happened over the course of a few weeks about two years ago i was working as a construction design engineer for hospitals doing plumbing and air conditioning i work for a company that's hired by the hospital not for the hospital itself my company had been hired to do er renovation on an old hospital and the plans for the existing building were really old or damaged or didn't exist anymore now as the low man on the totem pole i got the fun job of going out to the hospital to document and investigate the existing building now because this was an er and therefore 24 hours a day we had to time our investigation for non-busy times namely 3 am to 7 am in the middle of the week i was also working my normal office hours so for all these interactions i was exhausted and just didn't give a crap so on to the story i had parked in the hospital parking garage on the top floor to be out of the way of patients and visitors i had finished early because an emergency had come into the er and i had to get out of the way i also had some extra time so i decided to close my eyes for a bit before driving to the office when i was woken up by a tapping on my window a man was peering in the window and we'll call him parking dude now i wave at him thinking he was just making sure i was alright because i was sleeping in the hospital parking lot he then gestured for me to roll down my window so i cracked it to hear him better the man gruffly declared hey employees are to park in the back lots or on the street if that's full next time i'm going to have you towed he then turned in march to get back into his golf carts which he blocked me in with as i called out hey i don't work here he then left and i went back to work thinking that it was a one-time deal little did i know so over the next few visits i come back to my car to find increasingly angry parking tickets about parking and employee parking from now on they were printed on 4a and very obviously homemade with a blurry hospital logo and the word parking enforcement across the top the notes threaten booting towing and demands for my supervisor's name so i could be reported i wish i still had them to share with you my co-workers and i had quite a laugh over them i even left a note on my dash saying that i wasn't an employee the next ticket had a rant about me lying saying you'll be written up for lying once i get your supervisor's name then one morning i came out to find the guy waiting for me he had blocked off my car with his golf carts and he was grinning at me like a cat who got ice cream i then walked up to him and he said employees have to park in the back lot you are in so much trouble i demand to speak to your manager and yes he actually said that he then told me to give him their name and number and the department i work for and he won't let me leave until i give it to him now the guy did have my car blocked in and i tried to explain that i wasn't an employee i even pointed out my outfit that was work boots jeans safety glasses and a tool belt with flashlights tape measures lasers and a clipboard with my drawn plans i told him this is where the hospital admin told us to park but he insisted that my disguise wasn't going to trick him and he demanded to speak to my manager now at this point i was so exhausted and wasn't really up to arguing so i just pull out my business card my boss's card and then hand it over the dude then pulls out his phone and calls my boss to report me my boss later told me that he had told the guy to leave me alone or he was calling the police when the dude hung up he told me hey i'm letting you leave this time but next time you're here i'm gonna boot your car and find your real manager's number to report you the same trick with your friend won't work he then gets in his golf cart and zoomed away luckily my boss found this whole thing hilarious so it was about a week before i went back and i was almost done with my task i had finished for the day once again and headed out to my car to find that he had sort of done what he threatened there was a thick chain looped through the handle of my driver's side door and a cinder block all tied together with a large padlock now i knew the guy was a bit nutty but i also figured out that he didn't have any real authority so to find this half clever half poorly thought out ball and chain attached to my car was a bit of a surprise now i got into engineering because i like solving problems and this wasn't a particularly complex problem i simply rolled my window down and lifted the cinder block and excess chain into my car and then drove away i then passed the guy on my way out and to say he was shocked was an understatement i gave him a jaunty wave as i drove by it was a cold drive back to my office with the window open but it was worth to see the look on his face when i get to the office i had to go and sign out bolt cutters and was followed out by a parade of my co-workers to see it for themselves now i had to go back one more time and i was eager to see what he might do after his last plan failed so i come out to find that he had tried the chain and cinder block again this time he had wrapped the chain around the bottom of the wheel a few times and had their cinder block tied pretty close to the wheel and the chain was through my handle again it was definitely chained in a way that would take a lot more ingenuity to get out of or a pair of bolt cutters that i hadn't returned to the office you know just in case so i cut through the chain unchained the car and then loaded the whole lot into my trunk now the guy must have been harassing some other person because he only pulled up as i was backing out of the spots he then blocks my car with his card again and he jumps out the guy comes to my window and i rolled it down just a bit to see what he had to say the guy screaming hey hey hey hey where the heck are the chains how did you get loose this is stealing i will have your job for this now i never did hear the rest of the rant because i yelled magic and i'm not an employee i then drove around his cards and away it was the most dramatic exit of my life and will probably never be topped i'd like to think he's still puzzled over how i managed to unchain my car my boss did lodge a complaint but i don't think anything came of it anyway that's my i don't work here story i hope it was worth the read definitely worth the read guys and i think at that point i would have called police to let them sort it out like the guy was on such a power trip and i would have loved for police to have been there when i asked for his boss's phone number to have him fired i'm sure his boss would have loved to hear about him chaining cinder blocks to people's cars like how absurd is that i would have been so pissed okay so i swear i have and asked me to help you look because i get this on a regular basis so on this day i'm at wonderful wacky mod with my wife and my one-year-old daughter we stop in for a few items we need for dinner one of them being marshmallows now i'm wearing sandals cargo shorts and a green t-shirt with a skull on it not any of the colors that the store employees wear my wife grabs a store brand bag of marshmallows but it's actually the name brand so i squat down while holding my daughter and search for the store brand because it's the exact same thing but two bucks less i find it and we move on our way i then go back because i forgot to get brown and white sugar so i take my daughter with me back to the baking aisle a woman who had been in the aisle previously is still there now to give you a picture of this woman she's in her mid-30s and it looks like she's had a few kids she also looks like the type of mother who got married and had kids way too early and now she's trying to go back and relive the early 20s that she feels she missed out on the woman's got yoga pants on but she's got no business even owning any her shirt is bedazzled and she's got one of those short haircuts where the hair in the front is longer than the hair in the back also she's wearing a purple sparkle fedora now because of that we'll call her pf for purple fedora so i'm getting the sugar and she comes up to me and tells me that i need to get something for her i then look at the 10 pounds of sugar in one hand and 20 pounds of baby in the other arm and tell her sorry i've got my hands full here the woman then says i saw you help the other woman now help me i say to her my wife you saw me help my wife she then says well i'm more important than your wife because i'm a customer to which i say to her what makes you think you're more important than my wife you're a stranger i've never met she then repeats because i am a customer i tell her so am i and she says no no you work here now put that baby down and help me at that point i just walk away to very unmotivated threats about managers and being fired and calling corporate fast forward to the self checkout and the woman's in line behind us we go to the next available register and i hear her asking the guy in charge of the self checkout hey does that man with the baby work here to which the guy wearing khaki pants blue polo and a store vest says no why would you think he works here he's wearing shorts and a skull t-shirt and the woman turns visibly red and my wife and i laughed hysterically for the remainder of our time checking out oh i love it when karen's feel shamed guys like nothing is better than an entitled rude woman turning tomato rad when she realizes her mistake and i love how that employee responds why would you think he works here he's wearing shorts and a skull t-shirt okay so yesterday the internet in the dorm room i live in went down and the landlady tried calling tech support she's an old woman who's about 80 years old that runs the business with her daughter that was absent at the moment i asked the help out but she said she got it and wanted to try it by herself so i let her the woman dials the number puts it on speaker because she can't hear very well and another old lady answers and the following conversation happens the other old lady says hello and my landlady starts going yes hello my name is so-and-so and i live in this address first of all i'd like to apologize for calling so late but i do have a problem with my online computer internet i don't know much about it i just wanted to ask if you have time to help us please the old lady says what the landlady then repeats what she says this time being extra polite and the old lady says internet no honey i don't have internet but maybe i can consider buying some how much does it cost my landlady then says oh my it has a cost well i don't have much money my husband's sick and i don't mean to cause trouble but can you give us a discount now the old lady on the other side must have been hard of hearing because she said it comes with a discount that's so good i would like to buy two internets please to which my landlady says what old lady then raises her voice and says i said i would like to buy two internets now at this point i can hear another young woman who comes in and says mom who are you talking to to which the old lady says the lady here is helping me by internets at a discount the daughter's confused she then says mom give me the phone she then picks up the phone and says i'm sorry but we don't want any internets and then she hangs up my landlady then says excuse me she then turns to me and says i think i have the wrong phone number now at that i tried hard not to laugh because i didn't want to embarrass her so i just picked up the phone and called the actual tech support which by the way came a few minutes later and said someone forgot to plug in the router when i got to my room i was crying laughing guys i love this story so much the interaction of these two women were hilarious just two people not knowing anything about internet trying to sell and buy internet i love it i would like to buy two internets please guys and now my friends brings us to another end of our slash i don't work here lady guys i hope you enjoyed the stories today if you did hit that thumbs up and if you missed the last episode on the channel it's a r slash pro revenge where op gets revenge on this karen boss who comes in and decides to fire everybody left and right it's such a wild story so go check it out if you haven't and myself and stevie boy will see you guys in the next one we love you

Channel: DarkFluff

Views: 201,718

Keywords: reddit IDWHL, r/idontworkherelady, reddit i dont work here lady, i dont work here, mistaken for employee, idwhl reddit, funny reddit stories, mistaken employee, darkfluff idwhl, darkfluff, entitled women, instant karma, entitled people reddit, entitled karen, reddit, entitled people, karen freakout, karen story, funny karen stories, reddit funny stories, entitled, racist karen, instant karma on karen, i dont work here lady stories, karen freakouts, karens in the wild

Id: gDBT4zyW6xo

Length: 22min 36sec (1356 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 08 2022