RELATIONSHIPS AND TOXIC RELATIONSHIPs

hello everybody and welcome back to my channel loving your life with Mama D and of course I'm Glenda Davis aka Mama D and today is glow Wednesday today's episode is going to be on relationships that's right relationships there are so many different kinds of relationships based on different kinds of Love okay so we're going to dive into at least one one or two parts today this is going to be more than of one episode uh because there's a lot to uh unfold in relationship so if you're interested in that content stick with me let's get started okay if you haven't already subscribed to my channel I hope that you pause and take a moment to do it right now because it is free then C you a time to to go ahead and subscribe to ring the notification Bell so you get all the upcoming video and please share it with someone okay and leave me a comment if it's something you agree with or something you disagree with that's fine let's talk about it okay because there's a lot to unveil and a lot to uncover and a lot to unfold when it comes to relationships are you in a relationship what kind of relationship there are many many types of relationships and the relationships as I said earlier are actually based on the types of Love there are traditionally four types of love I heard they have put in a fifth love I had to do a little research about that but the initial four loves is one the agape love that's the one that is a unconditional love it's a love that God puts in us that we will love our fellow man uh it doesn't have to be a person that you know it can be some a total stranger and you have empathy and compassion and uh you don't want to see anyone hurt uh if you see a woman on the street she's struggling and say she's expecting a baby and she's been overh holding her stomach and almost like she's going in labor would you just drive by and say oh look at that lady or would you stop and and try to give her some assistance or or see what's wrong uh that's the agape love in us that just loves it's it's that love that you you don't have anything hinged on to it it's just a pure love that we should have within our own heart to love others to just love and care and I think that's the purest type of love then there's the store J or the store gay uh this is uh the love that we have for like our mother and father our sister and brother it's more like a family love it's a a unity love it's a love that uh you you have because you're with this person all the time or when a mother has her baby she puts that baby in her arms and she just loves it and then the father he's embracing mom and the baby and then you have another child then the sister and brother that's my brother that's my sister and you just love on her because uh it's it's like a family type of Love next type love is the Fila love or the felia love and that's the love that is a brotherly love and that's where uh Philadelphia gets his name and it's a slogan is Philadelphia the the City of Brotherly Love That Brotherly Love is um a love that you choose you know it's a chosen kind of love I I choose uh to be your friend where God tells us to love one another so we have a brotherly love uh for the person that we choose to Love Not A Love that uh you're born into uh not necessarily The Godly love but uh I choose to love okay and then there's the other love is the Eros that love is the Exotic love okay it's a love for a husband and wife it's a kissing it's a hugging it's a passionate love love it's that love that you feel that when you see somebody it's like oo baby okay so it is erotic love and it's a love that God uh he actually ordained that love and between husband and wife he says you know leave your mother and father leave that uh storj love and cleave to your wife which now you're going to have that OS you know and you're also going to have a family love it's going to be there also but that erotic love is going to be there for the one that you want to engage with okay all right so now that we have uh those particular loves in mind now let's talk more into the relationship now I'm going to back away from the loves and we're going to talk about relationships in as a whole by the time you've turned 50 or probably even 4540 and especially by the time uh you hit 60 and and I'm uh I'm 69 so I have experienced all the loves and I believe by now if you are 40 or older Pro you can even be 30 and have experienced all the loves in fact you're probably going to be in your 20s and have experienced all those loves um but when it comes to relationships we experience love through relationships relationships I feel should make you feel comfortable and make you feel good if you're in a relationship that's any relationship that you're in where you don't feel comfortable you don't feel loved you don't feel EX aced then you you need to make some some choices you need to make some moves you need to do some soul searching evaluating one of the things my father uh said to me years ago he said the world is wide this is I mean this is deep to me it was very deep I never forgot it he said the world is wide if it's not working for you over here then move over to the other side okay now initially as a young person you would think they're talking about globally which it can be globally but I understand it as if you're in a relationship over here and it's not working and if if it's a type of relationship that you can move away from then go to another relationship get out of that relationship and move to a more healthy relationship I believe at this point in in the world in society there are too many toxic relationships and that's why we have so many people who have anxiety and depression and and just go going through so many mental problems and issues is because the relationships are not healthy and they're not strong and they're not good you know I feel this is going to be a one of those conversations that's going to last a while I know I know it is so how you deal with uh relationships are based on um their importance to you they're based on your culture they could be based on your religion absolutely uh they can be based on your past experiences that's a big one a big one how we were treated in past relationships U make a difference in how we enter into another relationship because we have a tendency to carry that baggage from past pain past hurts and past issues we carry them over into other relationships that's why it is imperative to get healed from bad relationships if once you get out and if you're fortunate enough to escape an abusive relationship a toxic relationship before you move on get help to clear your mind your heart and and to get yourself right so that you won't put all those issues and those triggers onto and into your next relationship you understand what I'm saying okay today I want to talk about toxic relationships as a u as one of the foundations okay if you are in a toxic relationship how let's start here how do you know that you're in a toxic relationship if your relationship is toxic you will not feel value um you will not feel the love the the energy uh of the relationship will be um kind of a a very negative type energy uh when you're around the person you have fear um if the person doesn't validate you if they don't support you if they're showing extreme levels of jealousy um if they give you the silent treatment uh and I'm I'm not talking about you have a disagreement and then you have to get quiet and go to your neutral corners for a minute but I'm talking about days Days of the silent treatment that's a form of abuse um if you're in a physically abusive relationship where a person is putting their hands on you um even if it's not a physical it can be a veral where you're being called names are being put down um that's that's a toxic relationship and then you have to ask yourself why are you in this toxic relationship how did you get into the relationship and what do you do to get out of the relationship yeah now there are times when as a woman and let me be clear abusive relationships are not always a man abusing the woman many times there are women who abuse men oh yes do some research look it up and um I went to a conference once where they were talking about giv numbers uh giv statistics of uh the levels of uh reported abusive relationships and how uh now it it it was a time where there were only women or mostly women who would report abuse in a family um and then the numbers began to rise where men were reporting abuse from women and then numbers start to go up uh in the divorce rate and abuse and uh it came out of uh same-sex marriages where um divorces were first recorded just from men and women but now to add to that there were men and women relationships and men and men and women and women relationships that were now added to the equations so divorce can't happen in any of these uh relationships so if you're in a toxic relationship and you understand that you're in a a toxic relationship by how you feel and what you see and honey you know you know don't sit there and act like well you know he just had a bad day or or she just was you know PMSing or whatever uhuh don't give them no excuse don't don't do that because you know day after day week after week and month after month that this thing ain't changing it ain't getting no better you're in a toxic relationship do you want to stay in that relationship or do you want out now I've been told that getting out of a toxic abusive relationship can be very dangerous it can be very dangerous that is why you should always confide in a friend someone that you can trust because you're going to need some help in most cases to get out and get free okay I would not advise anyone to try uh to escape an abusive relationship on their own you need to confide in someone get some help now I know uh there's women helping women uh there's places like the Bethany house uh you just have to look up what the sources of help is in your city you can check with the social worker social workers you can check with at the school the school can give you help the church can give you help the hospital can give you help the doctor's office can give you help you know even without initially going to the police but you need a foundation you need uh someone or something that you can stand on that you know will be a source of support that won't let you down when things get tough okay so woo I'm this is this this is this is very difficult even to talk about it's very difficult for me to talk about because I know there's so many women and I don't know as much about the men but I have talked to so many women down through the years who have been in very toxic relationships I I know I know and it's hard to deal with it's hard to talk about but if you're in a toxic relationship start making some plans reach out to um social worker Hospital doctor someone who can give you some help and you're going to need I believe that you're going to need a good friend or someone that you can talk to as you work through it okay um I I really don't even want to move away from this too quickly because I have some other thoughts um so many other thoughts of my mind that that goes along with this now if you are a woman and you are the one who's the abuser or you're the one who's creating the atmosphere of a toxic relationship that I'm going to challenge you as woman to woman that you look in the mirror and ask yourself why why what happened and if you are a man because it works both ways if you're the one who's toxic because um I have been told that uh half of my viewers and my subscribers are men and if you happen to be one of those brothers who are abusive if you're toxic and you know it if you're alcoholic if you're using drugs if you were depressed yourself if you had some history in your past that you have had to deal that you have had to deal with or you have not dealt with then I encourage you that you look in that mirror and ask yourself why and tell yourself you need help and then you go get yourself help go get yourself some help I'm serious get help get help you need help and I pray for you and you pray for you that God will start to turn some things around in your life because there it it is possible it is possible for you to change and to deal with your hurt to deal with that thing that's affecting you because what this channel is all about and what this particular segment is all about is you're glowing from the inside out if your flame is out on the inside and you're burdened with darkness that you cannot glow then you need to get help you need that flame reignited so you can be who you are supposed to be and who God wants you to be because really deep down inside you don't want to hurt anybody it's only the hurt people who hurt people okay I do not want to get emotional and I don't want this video to be too long so this is where I'm going to pause today's segment in relationships I'm going to ask you if you're in a relationship that is toxic it will affect your health it will cause you to be depressed it will cause you hurt it will cause you high blood pressure it can cause you anxiety to the place other illnesses can come on it can affect your heart it can affect your breathing it can affect your skin it can affect your mental capacity it's so much that is involved in being in aox in a a toxic relationship and I admonish you I'm not telling you to divorce anybody I'm not telling you to leave anybody I'm telling you to get you some help a counselor a therapist a doctor a good pastor a good friend a good family member that can hold water there's some folk that can't hold water in a bucket okay they'll tell your business as fast as you tell them honey they'll go tell it make sure that you're talking to a reliable person and that's why I I encourage you to go to a professional counselor to get some help the help that you need okay listen I love you I care so much about you and your health I want you to glow from the inside out and God can help you get out of that dark place and I hope these videos can help you as well listen I am I'm not a licensed therapist so I'm not the one these are totally based on my experience and my opinion okay so Mama D just want you to live your best life listen it's your life you you love it and make the best of it you don't make the best out of a just your bad situation make it the best out of it means to take what you have and make what you want okay so that you can live life freely and happy God loves you and so do I until next time you have a very blessed day byebye

Channel: Loving Your Life with Momma D

Views: 53

Keywords: #InShot

Id: SJHdFoKMGQ8

Length: 21min 54sec (1314 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 17 2024