- It's time for the first
reaction video of 2019. I'm excited, I just came
back from Costa Rica, maybe you could notice the tan. Nurse Jackie Episode 1, Season 1. Be-whoop! (bright house music) - [Jackie] What do you call
a nurse with a bad back? Unemployed. - No!
- Ba-dum-bump. (laughs) - Are those tomatoes? (slow classic music) Literally cherry tomatoes. I like cherry tomatoes. Nope, those are not cherry
tomatoes, she's doing lines. - [Jackie] Can you show me two fingers? Peter, two fingers? - Hey doc, you should get an iPhone. - You think so? - All right this doctor's
absolutely awful, this doesn't happen in hospitals, if it does, people should be
losing their medical licenses. The patient is clearly mentally unstable, or has some sort of altered mental status, because he's in and out
of the conversation, he can't hold up two fingers, and his doctor is like,
checking his Blackberry and talking about a vacation to St Barts. Come on bro! And first of all, who has a Blackberry? I used to. - He's got a bleed, I'm
telling you right now. - [Doctor] He's totally lucid, 100%. Knock knock. - Who's there? - See, what did I tell ya - (laughs) That's not how we determine someone's neurological status. We do something known as
the Glasgow Coma Scale, which gives you a score from 0-15, depending on how alert you are. Besides that, we do a complete
neurological examination. We don't just look at someone,
make a knock knock joke, and just assume they're good. (sad and gentle piano music) - [Nurse] Acute Subdural Hematoma. The brain puffs up so fast,
it rips the blood vessels, and you bleed to death inside your skull. - The skull is a closed environment, and when you bleed into the skull, that builds up extreme pressure, now that pressure exhibits
what we call Mass Effect onto the brain, and
puts even more pressure and causes your brain cells to die. Horrible that this patient had
to loose his life like this, for what, cause a doctor had an ego and wanted to look cool
in front of the nurse? - You should not have died.
- I agree - Peter Michael Donovan. - Wait is she forging his organ donorship? - It may be a shame but
it will not be a waste. - If she forged his
organ donor certificate on the back of his license that's crazy. I have no words for that. - We worked 911, not a scratch on us, Peter's job is to ride a
bike, and he get's killed. - Riding a bike is incredibly dangerous, when I worked at a level 1 trauma center, we would see bike accidents
happen all the time, and unfortunately, many of
these people don't wear helmets, and essentially, what
happens is they come in, horrible brain bleed, and
its often too late for us to even intervene in the hospital, and they loose their lives. - I tell you to order a scan,
you order a goddamn scan, because if you don't do it I'll
just go to the next doctor, and the next doctor after
that, and in the mean time, that kid died, and it is all on you. Wh- is this happening, not
happening I can't even tell. - Oh shit, oh crap, I-
I'm so sorry, oh God. No, when I get nervous I act out with inappropriate sexual
touches, it's like turrets. - It's over, okay it
happened and now its over, so there's that. I don't like chatty, okay, I
don't do chatty, I like quiet. Quiet and mean, those are my people. - I've worked with nurses
that were mean like this, and I will say that secretly inside, despite this mean exterior, they have the biggest and sweetest hearts, they care about people, and the
only reason they're so mean, is because they wanna
protect their patients. They don't put up with nonsense, so I defend you mean nurses. - [Jackie] We got you
inside, it's all right. - Got some John getting
off cutting up hookers in the back of a limo,
dumped her in the alphabets. - Why did he have to cut me so bad? - Did they get him? - Nah, be on the lookout
for Vincent Van Gogh and his fancy-fucking suit. She got the blade away from
him, cut his whole ear off. - Good girl, okay, put it on ice. - You never wanna take an organ like that that is very sensitive and
put it directly on ice, you wanna wrap it in a wet
cloth, and then put that on ice, because the ice can
actually damage the tissue, almost like creating frostbite. - [Nurse] Puke away from the ear Zoe. (laughs) (screams) (chuckles) - Typical day in the hospital. - What do you doctors have
against healing people for Christ sake? [Doctor] Ha, see that right
there, healing, helping, fixing, it's fantastic. That's why you're a nurse. - I'm not digging the
stereotype right now. Doctors help people,
when we go get lunches or dinners together, we talk about what we
could have done better, we try and learn from our cases, so I'm taking this to heart right now, and bad Nurse Jackie show writer. - 4 minutes til brain damage. - 2 til she passes out. - [Lady] Excuse me, we
need some help here. - [Jackie] I got it, you're buying lunch. (sighs) (grunts) - By doing the Heimlich
maneuver like that, what you're doing is you're increasing the inter abdominal pressure,
which then forces the air out, therefore, helping you push out whatever it is you are
choking on, or this poor lady in this case, is choking on. - [Paramedic] 16 year old male, shot a Roman candle out of his ass. - Third degree burns on his
scrotum and rectal area. - Oof, he put a firework in his butt? - [Doctor] Can we close the door? (laughter) - Never in my life have
I examined the patient, let alone examined a patient in stirrups with the door open like that, come on now. Come on now! - I cannot even begin to imagine what it must feel like
to be you right now. And I'm not going to cushion it, and tell you I'm so sorry for your loss, I know it is much bigger than that. But I am deeply, deeply sorry. But if its any comfort,
he's gonna be a hero now. His body is going to save lives. - That's actually an
incredibly good speech. Concise, easy to understand,
still apologetic, without going too far. Except the fact that obviously she lied and forged his organ donor signature. - Fine, can I have his heart? - Whoa! - I'm sorry? - That took a turn. - Or how about a kidney? I know there's like this organ market where rich people buy, pay a
lot of money for body parts. - I know, it doesn't work that way. - $20,000 for a kidney. Don't you think he owes me that? For getting himself killed
on that goddamn bike. - A family member or girlfriend
of someone who just died. Give me one of his organs
so that I can sell it on the Black Market, what? - He made me pancakes this morning. - And you want to sell his kidney. You know what's funny, I've
never seen these pills before, cause A I don't take them, and B when I order them for my
patients I don't see them, they pick them up either at the
pharmacy, or even at bedside and the nurses brings them to the patient, so I've never seen these pills. What doctors have, is
we have some great apps, like Epocrates, that we
can open, get information about the medications we're giving. You can check the dosing, the formulary, adverse reactions, drug interactions, but then you go click
here for pill pictures, and you could see, but
none of these look like the ones she was using. What about OxyContin. Pill pictures... none of these are red. Oh, oh, these kinda look like
what she was using right? - That woman you cut took 287 stitches and 10 pints of blood. - [Patient] She liked to cut herself. - Oh it was her idea? - Yes, American women
are very adventurous. - She probably did it for attention. - What do you do for attention? - I'll be right back. (beep) you. (laughs) (flushing) - I could have saved that
boy, that messenger kid. I knew there was a bleed, I felt it. - This is where we need to use this as a learning opportunity
to create a system in their hospital, like my hospital has, where anyone, whether you're a nurse, part of the janitorial
staff, doctor, resident, can report an error like this, that needs to be investigated by the staff so it doesn't happen again, and even if, let's say they had a good outcome, and she still felt like
she wasn't being heard, she needs to come on to
that system and report what we call a near miss,
and a near miss is when a mistake almost happens,
even though you catch it, but you still use it as
a learning opportunity so that a near miss
doesn't even happen again. - Do you think there's
a finite amount of pain in the world? Like if I take the thorn
out of someone's hand, does that pain have to go somewhere else? - Yes, that's why there's drugs. - (laughs) No, disagree - I think you're a
Saint, just so you know. (shuffling) - I like her bunny scrubs, I'm jealous, I want a pair like that. (beeping) (scuffling) - Dammit, I almost killed you. - That's why we don't
take drugs on the job. It's pretty funny but
it looks like those bags are just saline, so I don't
know how she almost killed him, but it doesn't look like it. That's what we call a
near miss by the way. - Wanna come over tonight? - Not tonight okay? - I brought you something for your back. - Doctor Pepper. Moon pie, I was thinking more
along the lines of Vicodin. - There's actually been a lot of scandals, with doctors and pharmacists
either overprescribing narcotics, or maybe even getting
caught stealing narcotics, now, they're locked up in these machines. In my hospital they're
called Pyxis machines, where you need to
actively get fingerprints, they'll scan your badge in
order to get any kind of number of medications out. Also there's been a lot of
doctors where I come from in Brooklyn, that have
been arrested and charged with distributing these
narcotics because they were just writing scripts for patients nonstop, 100 pills, 100 pills, unlimited refills. Those who haven't yet been caught, be wary because we are coming for you. - Be careful. - (beep) you - Whoa, welcome to New York. (puncturing) How did he not catch that? No joke, I am a fan of Nurse Jackie. It's not a doctor show, but there's enough medical stuff for me to comment on for sure. If you want a funny video,
check out my bloopers. Click it, I know you wanna. Stay happy and healthy.
