Top of the mornin' to ya laddies! My name is Jacksepticeye and welcome to a game called "Broke Protocol". I've seen this game mentioned a lot and I've seen the-the type of game, I've seen screenshots of this game before, around But I never merged the two of them together, I didn't know that this was what Broke Protocol was. But I had a lot of people asking me to play this This is a fairly new thing, new- well new-ish that -- oh god, since March? Still new-ish in the grand scheme of things. It's just- It's a GTA type of game, it's an open world sandbox kind of thing. But it's done in kind of the style of Paint the Town Red. if you remember what that looks like you can play online if you want, but I'm not going to do that right now i'm going to play offline because I wanna test it out and see what it's all about. ooh, look at them clouds! Ah, we get to register a person! Your name's not going to be "new guy" your name's going to be "BrodyKent" *Desperatly* That looks like me, right? *Nervous chuckle* Pretty much-- he's got the hat sometimes I wear glasses and I got the little facial hair going on! that looks a lot like me! "no gloves" do you need gloves? There's no gloves to pick from anyway.. Okay whatever what am I doing? "server info" - I thought I was- *Mix between a cough and a laugh* I though I was just..offline oh god "enter doors, vehicles, and interact with middle mouse button + wheel" - why? "weapons are in the gunshop near the construction zone" "rob people with the middle mouse" - yeh-he-hess "hands up then search" "drugs boost health and can brew-? and can be processed and grown by robbing seeds from people. You hear that, people? Drugs boost health- apparently hello sir-- tha-, he just fucking changed.. get a job as police by talking with the cop- Okay. I can probably figure this out as I go along Are you? Are these actual people? Or is this-- I-I don't know what's happening What's going on?! I'm running away! I'm fucking scared! He has a fucking cleaver! Get away from me, I don't want to have anything to do with you! Can I punch people? I need a gun or something POLICE! POLICE! Uh "my crimes" "equipment" What do I have? Police? Hello? Arnold is trying to kill me, police and I think that these might just be AI people Can I get in the boat and leave? I want to do something-- also I banged my toe earlier and now it hurts C-can I- how do I drive? How do I get the boat and go? Ok-- they caught him! Oh, thank you! People say "fuck the police" but I say "thank you sirs for your" - oh Shit! (he laughs) Well, what's happening? Am I alive or am I dead? I'm fucking Jesus! I'm walking on water everybody! Nope-- I drowned. "You're knocked out" "Ask for paramedic or suicide" One suicide please! But man now i'm down a thousand money! Well, off to a great start - I bust out the womb with my fists in the air, and then I just died immediately. Ooh, cop car! Ca-- can I has? "Get value" "Buy" Crimes cle... I thought I was buying something! Not fuckin'... shootin' shit! Why-- why does punching things make gunshot sounds?! sir stop! SIR! SIR! POLICE! Hel- ah-fuck sake, he MOWED me down! k, that's neo.. NEO! HANDS UP! crime commited, intimidation..yes! uh, search.. what can I take form you? I can take a fuckin' hammer. take all! yeah I don't want your fuckin' clothes though, okay you're free to go Neo Bye! I have a crime of robbery, that's not too bad the cops aren't gonna kill me for that um...how do I equip? Bind key one... Bind key two... okay, is that..? *click* I have a frikin' hammer! hahaha! Watch out everybody! Jacks about to drop the hammer! They- I'm a super- I'm superhero now, they call me "Jackhammer" How do I get into buildings? I'm lernin' okay. This is why i wanted to get into offline mode before people started messin with me and I didn't know what was go-in' on.. *police sirens* Ah, no, no, no, it's not me! it's that other guy who had a hammer...hammer joe, as they call him. *tires screeching* I need to get some money, I need to get some money from people..I might have to commit some mur-day but that's fine I need to get food and water and everything in this game Ooohh why call this freakin why not just call it the game of life trade request trade request Tra wha fuckin Leon doesn't want anything HANDS UP!!! fuckin Leon here now this is happening Ohhoohaoo Oh fuck he's got a knife! POLICE! I know I swung first but *whimpering sounds* *evil laughter* Take that Leon you son of a bitch! Ohhshh I almost got hit by a car this fuckin epic knife fight in the middle of town Ahhh now the cops are after me Well that's just lame. Why'd ya have ta get the cops involved Leon We were havin a civil dispute with hammer and knife wasn't even no guns involved All I wanted was some drugs Okay. Shhh! *whispering* I think I lost em. There's a cop over there does he see me? You comin after me? I don't know if he sees me, he's gone. AHHHHHAHAHA FUCK jesus christ you scared the shit outta me! Don't do that to me! You fuck. Go away! Okay maybe now I could actually drive a boat now that I know what buttons do. maybe I co WOOAAHHH look at that boat! That boats awesome! I want that one Maybe I'll just hang out by the beach I mean they'll never attack me then. Who would ever suspect that a man with a hammer on the beach was actually the masked vigilante JackHammer all along. Not I. Oh shit theres police everywhere. Oh look it's Rad Dad I wanna be part of Rad Dad How do I do things Those are some nice shoes you got Can I just *sigh* guys *sigh* come on guys. Why you gotta be like this? Do I have any money? What are they doing? Their fighting each other. But why though?Their not Ohh their after me again I want this car this is my car this is the best car niiice car Drive Yesssss *laughing* peace out ya'll! *maniacal laughter* *imitating police sirens* now I'm the police Now I'm the law Ohh that shop apparently has girls girls girls tho No now's not the time *imitates screeching tires* Now is the time for ICE CREAM! I scream you scream, I scream louder than you you don't win! *uses police radio voice changer* This is the Police. Everybody put your hands up and your pants down. Then shake your butt all around it's party time in broke protocol! Excuse me. Sir. Sir. Sir! You didn't have the right of way! mother fucker. That didn't kill em? What does it take to kill a mother fucker. He's shootin my car with a crowbar. That's it that's it Ehhh pew! Mother fuckers! Imma drive over all ya Oh now the police are gonna be really on my ass *giggle* Maybe I'll scare them. They'll think it's guns and run away Scuse me, scuse me, pardon me, scuse me. Owww poles are the enemy Crime: murder! Uh oh my car is, my car is gonna explode My car is gonna explode How do i get out? Get out Okay. Can I, can i search you? HE VANISHED! GHOST! Mhm fucking getting out of here, I ain't messing with no X-Files bullshit Okay Siren off, there we go They'll never know it's me now What you guys want, is the police car with the SIREN going off Mine, listen! *silence* No siren! Not me! Aaaaand.... Get out! There Bury the evidence! Hahaha I'm gonna go get myself a new haircut - (jack what the heck are you saying) Hold up now, is that car gonna explode? I really hope that car explodes That'd be really cool if that car would explode for me I shot it a lot with my hammer YEAAAH! See! Now they're gonna think that the, the fabled vigilante "Jack Hammer" was killed- in a watery, fiery grave See - I go out, I go out in two contradictory types of death I, I - both go on fire and explode and drown at the same time It's a very hard thing to do but only "Jack Hammer" is capable Okay, you say that the- Okay shh shh *sniffs* shh *sniffs some more* I smell no pigs around You guys said, that the weapons were somewhere around the construction zone What's up Clint? How are you doing? Do you wanna, do you want your hands up for me? Hands up! Hands up Clint Lemme see what you got Money, yeees Take all the money You have pistol ammo but you don't got no pistol You're useless to me Clint! I'm moving on! I need to get a gun I'm gonna hold up lots of people until I get a gun There's no cops around, is there? No, shh Ash! ASH! Hands up Ash! Oh god, *nonsense* I meant your hands up and surrender! Not hands up as in like 'dude, get out and fight' Why you gonna be like that Ash? Why you gonna be like that, all I want - what are you doing on your car? It's Shaft! Of course Shaft will be standing on top of the car like that Ohhh Shaft Classic, vintage Shaft Go away cops! Attack Ash! He's the one who wouldn't give me all of his money! That's a crime in my book He's probably here already- Ah fuck, AHH FUCK Duuuuude, you straight up shot me Ahhhh - that's where the guns are, in the pawn shop! Okay Good *Laugh* Jack's - back in the game You can't hold me down for too long I'll just respawn and kick your ass again *Low voice* Airport Are there planes in this game I can't get into these, can I? You're just sitting here - You're dangling the fruit in front of me And you're just laughing at me BUUUH BUUUUH!! I wanted to fly a plane! Hello Dominic! How are you today? Hands up Dominic! W-W-What you got Dominic? What you got? You got some fucking - cocaine? Mother of God You got some fucking money Oookay Keep walking Dominic! Yeah, just 'cuz I stole your shit doesn't mean that you- deserve anything else Okay, let's go into my equipment Let's bind that to key 1 You better watch out there, Bruce! Jack's got himself a fucking cleaver! Okay HANDS UP BRUCE! That's right! I'm gonna take all of your money! Okay I don't need anything else Thank you Bruce! 'preciate you boo! Ok, now that I've robbed Dominic and Bruce and left them poor and alone for the rest of their lives I'm gonna find me that pawn shop again. And when I find that pawn shop, that means I'm gonna be able to buy some gans! And I'm gonna shoot people! I'm gonna shoot them dead in their stupid faces! Well, aren't I just a big straight cock'n'balls There's a frickin' minimap in the bottom left that I didn't even see! It has a gun... drawn on it. I should have known that I'm also right beside the police station so, thaat's a little scary. Aww, I can't actually go buy anything then! 'cause isn't there gonna be a cop inside? Shit! I need to go hide; I need to go lay low; I need to vanish like a sneaky snek.
