Popular Pieces Of Advice That Are Total Bull**** - AskReddit

when girls get older they will lose interest in the popular guys and realize how smart you are what piece of advice did you take to heart when you were younger that turned out to be BS don't change who you are for other people I get what they're going for when people say that but sometimes your head and you should change it's still a good idea to change depending on the crowd if you're in a group of people that don't play video games but that's all you want to talk about it's not going to go well for you broaden your horizons student loans don't mean anything just pay them twenty dollars a month and they'll leave you alone I've always been told that student loans were the best kind of debt to have it never actually bit me in the butt but I do believe that is complete BS take out a loan for a car that you realize later you can't pay sell the car and get back most of that can't pay back student loans well you can't just go and sell your degree I am paying six hundred sixty dollars minimum monthly payments and will continue to do so for another 20 years if my life it's only a matter of time until more Americans wake up to the fact they can travel to highly respected colleges in other countries for half the price all you have to do is work hard the job will find you if you're the best then I learned about this thing called networking all throughout grade in high school it was stay in school get good grades and get a good job never once was I ever really told it's about who you know until midway through college and by the point I was too socially stunted to even know where to begin with meeting the right people meanwhile my friend that had a poor educational background failed college twice and finished with a general degree did a few extra courses in the technology sector mainly design a little coding for some private organizations networked like crazy cheated and lied at many of the networking sessions he ended up getting a job that pays over 100k with no experience Here I am with a master's degree in good grades throughout getting paid less than half I was taught it was rude to disobey adults adults don't automatically get unearned respect F the respect your elders BS that a whole could have been molesting his grandchildren for decades for all you know he doesn't get a yes sir or any amount of out of the way unnecessary responses other than the contextually appropriate and not rude response to whatever he says or asks I can't stand to be told it's rude not to say yes ma'am and yes sir you asked a question I answered that is appropriate and not Road you called my name I answered with a do you need something and that is appropriate and not Road F off with the entitled for no reason BS he's only picking on you because he really likes you I spent so many years letting a whole men abuse me because I was told that picking on me or being mean was because he likes me BS that reminds me of the people only bully you because they're jealous thing yeah maybe sometimes it's true but I also know that people get bullied just because the bully has hate and disgust towards someone and it has nothing to do with jealousy I see people who don't meet the perfect standard of beauty being shunned just because people think they're ugly that's not jealousy it's discrimination work hard and have unquestioned loyalty to your company eventually you'll be rewarded for it my work just laid everyone off after five years of listening to the whole loyalty speech nice reward tighten your belt and push through for the vision of the company was a speech we were all too familiar with also told us to be more efficient to get more projects out at half the time with the highest possible quality but with nothing in return it was insanity after all of that the company rarely ever gave raises despite pushing out work daily and even working unpaid overtime almost every other day I worked in an office and made less than my brother apparently did working in a grocery store never be loyal to a company in most cases they never care about you they use you step up at work and say I'll take care of it after 10 years of experience at a white-collar job I made the following Maxim proactivity is the art of getting yourself into trouble you wouldn't otherwise have and won't be paid more for it avoid it at all costs the reward for successfully taking on more work is drum roll more work there's much to be said for telling people you're too busy to take on more work most heroes don't get much if any bump and pay for being heroes and you can't either pay rent with gratitude no you don't have to change a thing about yourself when girls get older they will lose interest in the popular guys and they will realize how smart and talented you are and appreciate you quietness and I continued being introverted in playing video games all day for the next five years until I realized that I had to get out there and talk to people if I wanted to learn to have relationships with them so many wasted years cheaters never prosper or any other variation that tells people that doing the right thing is how to get ahead in life now I'm not advocating for breaking the law being an a-hole cheating or effing people over but look at the top of any industry from sports to politics to regular old jobs those at the top are rarely virtuous I definitely subscribe to the philosophy that the path from A to Z doesn't necessarily mean going though all 25 steps in between that there are lots of ways to cheat a little and get from A to Z with some shortcuts when I was getting started as a freelance designer in the wake of the dot-com implosion I absolutely fudged my portfolio and the way I marketed myself in order to win business I didn't outright claim others work as my own nor did I lie about my credentials but there are sins of omission and careful exaggeration that I absolutely utilize to get my foot in the door in my mind it's like borrowing an expensive suit to get into the club and returning it the next day fake it till you make it this works for some things but if you try to cure your depression with that as I was advised to do the only thing you get better at is faking it the depression is still there pretending it isn't just pushes it further down I no longer have the ability to assess my mental health because I've lied to myself for so long I don't how I feel anymore am I happy I don't know I don't think I feel anything but I keep smiling anyways just tell her how you feel not that this advice is inherently wrong but that it is far more complicated than that how you tell her how you feel is almost more important than the content of the message I think almost all guys have had that overshare moment where you basically profess your love for a girl when what you really should have said was hey would you like to go out this weekend always be good I didn't skip school I didn't smoke weed I had no life what made me furious was a field trip to the zoo we were allowed to run loose because we were sophomores in high school they gave us a worksheet to complete but it was old and didn't match up with the layout of the animals or even the details given on the info planks I spent the whole time filling those out hardly anyone else did they didn't take them up at the end of the trip I missed out on seeing so many animals I was pissed I didn't understand why no one else was mad they made us waste one of the few trips they take us on to the zoo turns out I was the poor girl and their parents take them to the zoo multiple times a year it was my first time to go since I was out of a stroller I was sad for many reasons that day turn the other cheek bullies need an e in the balls or they see you as weak and will bully harder turn the other cheek ruined my whole childhood it's a really misinterpreted saying a slap on the cheek was an insult not an attack it means to let insults go but does not mean you can't defend yourself if I had just been taught to stand up for myself I would have been so much better off but if my parents taught me to stand up for myself they would forfeit all control so they never did most arranged marriages result in happiness dating is tedious and the monotony of pursuing futile dates erodes your self-esteem repressive practices are often justified with platitudes by people who act like ignorant children it also makes me an idiot beyond redemption when I agreed and listened to them now I'm married to a man I resent and his married to a woman he disdains don't be deceived by the seductive fantasies negotiators weave in the veneer of happiness your acquaintances equipped to deter scrutiny no one likes to have their choices and validated but I can retain my dignity anonymously arranged-marriage in the 21st century and my culture never work in about another 100 years we'll finally D stigmatize divorce so no one has to endure the social opprobrium of being a divorcee sleep with as many women as you can while young and single to get it out of your system it just builds an addiction I used to be in a very hedonistic lifestyle the problem is it doesn't end there is no end game where you've had enough sex you always want more and more even though most times the idea of sex is better than the act of sex itself female genitals don't really feel that much different who it's attached to is what's important that I could do anything I wanted to I was always told that growing up and I guess it could have been true I never spent a single second thinking about what I did want to do because I knew I could do anything one day I woke up and realized maybe I should have thought a little bit more about what I really wanted I used to hear someone tell multiple people that work smarter not harder was for lazy people the truth is you can be the most hard-working individual at your job but if you aren't organized and efficient that won't mean anything I've had a few managers in this category those guys messed up an entire company working your butt off doesn't mean anything if you have no idea what you are doing the grind never stops culture is consuming the 18 to 30 year old demographic because they equate grinding with work hours at a dead-end part-time job where the boss's boss doesn't even know your name and they end up poor until around age 30 when they see all their colleagues buying houses and brand new cars and thinking to themselves crap I gotta get the hell out of here taking on debt is normal and a part of life such BS and I hate the defeatist mentality I remember my friends telling me I'd be in trouble if I didn't go to school now half of them dropped out all have debt most don't work in a field they enjoy I have absolutely zero debt it's actually pretty great I mean I'll buy a house in the next year or two and have a mortgage but otherwise I have nothing that I owe other than monthly bills for what I use could I have technically done a bit better by keeping low interest rates student loans longer and investing the money for a greater return yeah would it have made me as happy as being out from under it nope do what you love and the money will follow my rent is not paid by happiness and if that job is something I'd love you can bet that thousands of other people are also applying for that job instead focus on jobs which match your natural inclinations and work hard to be useful find aspects about your position that make you happy the money will come and then you may get to a point where you are happy if not you now have developed skills and a savings account so you can change to something else save your virginity until after you get married and everything will be so much better than if you give it away early well I got married and afterwards we discovered that my wife was asexual and never realized because her Christian upbringing didn't allow for self-exploration the next piece of advice that bit me in the butt was don't get divorced it's a sin and it'll just be a sign that you're a quitter and didn't pray hard enough well six years of sexless marriage later we got divorced and we both felt way better always be nice and try to make friends forgive and make amends because you never know when those connections will be important guess what your mental health is 500 times more important for your success financially socially academically etc than connections don't try to be friends with people who don't make an effort it'll wear you down and destroy your self-worth find friends who actually want to have a relationship with you it shouldn't be one-sided and sure you can forgive but not if it's at the expense of your safety or happiness girls love nice guys that's only half true they love nice guys that are interesting and engaging I highly recommend the article on Art of Manliness before you can be a gentleman you've got to be a man it talks about how the nice guys can frequently be a turn-off because that's all they have going for them basically you have to keep the barbarian attributes being in shape having a job and plan etc and add politeness on top of it or you become a joke don't care about what other people think I spent most of elementary school embracing that I was the weird kid I would do things just to make myself seem weird made up stories about myself that would be considered slander if someone else had said them high school was difficult for me because I wanted to break out of that reputation but kept falling back into the weird kid role later realized that it does actually matter what others think it's really important in things like getting a job or a relationship and I never learned how to make a good impression don't look for anyone just do what you love and you'll meet someone special when you least expect it this is the most toxic poisonous dating advice a young man can get a 99% of the time it's dispensed by well-meaning women thing is if you're a young woman you can go about your day and make no effort to meet anyone and you'll still meet lots of guys and get plenty of dates if you're a woman guys will approach you they will initiate conversations they will break the ice they will ask you out etc you know what happens if you're a young man and you make no effort to meet anyone absolutely nothing and nothing will keep happening for years I pursued my hobbies and did what I loved for years and haven't had so much as a single date with a girl all the wild guys around me were dating getting girlfriends getting married and starting families then it hit me the advice to not look for anyone only works for women which is why only women give it if you're a man you have to actively search for dates and make efforts to meet women otherwise you're going to rot in misery and solitude for years as I did unless you're a celebrity or lucky enough to have a sister who has tons of girlfriends she can set you up with you're gonna have to work to get dates of course there are exceptions to this of course there are clueless guys who just bumped into their future wife via down luck and she did all the work yeah that's like winning the lotto you can't plan your life on a gamble like that because most people do not win the lotto follow the guide to be a productive member of society ace your schooling get a degrees work till you drop keep working till you drop do everything possible to fit the social norms basically put your heart and soul into your work and it will repay you in kind I ace tests I did some college til I couldn't handle the stress of it I worked as an office worker for a while and did incredible things for the company as the number two under a working CEO I worked full days and would answer my phone regarding work at anytime I put my heart and soul into finding someone and settling enough to have her kid consider me as a father figure I worked myself to the bone for them and it ruined my relationship I lost the job because I could handle the stress of five times the workload with only one new person to help me I went to work for a company at a pay cut but much less stressful I worked all that I could for them odd hours in all weather it tore my body apart leaving me with a medical condition that means standing long enough to get through a grocery trip can leave me physically weak I have rotated my field to being able to work the strain of dealing with that weakness has given me other issues preventing me from doing anything with consistency my physical energy is day-to-day and my body will actually shut me down if I work through it too hard I try to be a realistic optimist things can only get better the problem is even though I tried to love what I do but how is that possible when you can't do anything don't burn bridges it is an awful way of thinking to me now that I am older let someone dangle a carrot for you no matter how bad they are feels very wrong as if I'm nothing more than what someone else can give me I took a lot of BS from employers and kept expecting to get recognized for it but in reality people that use you will never give you anything I like my new phrase way more Mather bridges I burn light the way thanks for listening to radio TTS hit the subscribe button for more interesting content click the right box for a video about cold hard facts of life that you are better off accepting share a BS advice in the comments below that did not help you at all and please follow Radio TTS on Twitter

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Id: l922CNL4skg

Length: 16min 48sec (1008 seconds)

Published: Tue Feb 25 2020