Overcome Adversity and Transform Your Life - Kim Kiyosaki and Kara Vaval

hello rich said community i'm kim kiyul sake i am the co-founder of the rich dead company along with my husband robert kiyosaki as well as the CEO and the author of the book rich woman and today we're gonna have a really special conversation because we're talking with a woman who has overcome tremendous adversity and has gone pretty much from nothing to a huge success and I know a lot of you watching a lot of times we get held back a lot of times we use excuses for why we don't do something or we procrastinate or we get into analysis paralysis and all of it is just a way for us not to keep moving forward and rich woman is all about of course women taking charge of their financial lives it's about women not depending upon a man or a family member or the government to take care of them it's about women's standing on their own two feet and being independent independent and financially free rich women so today we do have a rich woman with us and I'm very excited to hear her story and just have a really candid honest conversation about what it took to overcome some of the obstacles she faced some of the adversity she faced because as an entrepreneur as an investor even in your day to day life they're always facing adversities there's always a problem that comes up and I think that really the purpose of an entrepreneur and the purpose of any person to be of contribution the purpose is how to solve problems what is the problem out there that you can solve that you can contribute and be of service to humanity so today we have our guest care of a vow she is a entrepreneur I am she is a lawyer she is an author and your whole gig right now is you love empowering women to stand on their own two feet yes so welcome welcome to our show thank you so glad to have you here thank you excited so I'm excited you're here too so tell us that'll give us a little bit about your background because it's a very different background than a lot of us have okay well I I was born in New York to Haitian parents my parents met in New York but when I was six months old they decided to move back to Haiti which is where their country of origin okay so I grew up in Haiti I had a pretty charmed life you know all-girl Catholic school have an older sister back then she was three and a half years old when we moved and we had a great life what was he like back then hey the most impoverished nation in the Western Hemisphere has been instilled yes yes yes and a lot of political issues there's always something going on in Haiti you know growing up there I mean we had a good life my parents worked really hard my dad was an entrepreneur he was he worked for a company but also had businesses when you know oh right alongside that job and so but Hades just Haiti it's like a choice something you know we had to live through the embargo where you know there was a time where you can only go to school three days a one week and two days the other week when there was an invasion and you know no gas there's always something okay but grew up there and when I when I was 14 years old my dad at the time was 42 he went to work he was in the coffee business he left home on a Thursday he was due back from one of the Haitian you know one of the provinces in in in Haiti and that Saturday morning when he was on his way back home he had to stop at one of the speculators home it's long story around coffee but he was very brutally murdered there oh you know 14 I was 14 years old my sister was 17 my brother was five and my mother was a 40 year old widow Widow all of a sudden so how did that shape you from that moment on because that's a big wake up Paul yeah how did that it was the impact and where did that lead you to that area defining definitely a defining moment I don't know there was something my father was obsessed with my brother like he had wanted a boy for a really long time my brother's nine years younger than okay so he had two girls for a long time okay and so he finally had a boy and so automatically say my my dad because I'm I'm the youngest of three girls when I was born my mom's doctor said their doctor said well bill they say three of a kind is lucky in poker well that was the other he didn't want any boys after that he was happy with the girls yeah your dad wanted guys so he was a boy and he got his boy and here my brother was five when he died when my dad died and I was I you know by god you're um you're gonna do you're gonna make it you're gonna do well and I'm good I don't know I just became an adult overnight and it was like I there was something that kicked in that I needed to help my mom parent my brother cuz I could totally tell that she was just in shock yeah yeah yeah I mean my dad was the breadwinner you know and so it was it was hard for her to even process so she's one of the women that her her husband passes away she doesn't make money does she probably has no idea about the money I mean she's kind of a typical well she worked in the business we had a restaurant so she ran you know the restaurant and but it wasn't used you know she was part of what he had created right right and so um so here we are I can totally tell that she's disoriented and I realized that you know I got jumped in and took on the I got of mother up quick and I don't need a mother mother rule for my brother for myself as well I needed to start you know rearing myself I was clear right and so so that happened and of course you know when you not just as I still still hasn't been served as far as I know his murders correct okay although it was very clear where it happened who was involved but you know it's the corruption in leaves cases like this right and so then at one point you then you moved at one time you moved to New York I moved to New York a few years later so and once shy of my because you moved on your own yes my grandmother lived in New York I wanted to I couldn't be in Haiti anymore I sold I saw no future for myself so I moved to New York I lived with my grandmother for that one year while I put myself to my last year of high school did that graduated high school and enrolled myself in college and I was accepted at Adelphi University on Long Island which they offered me a full scholarship and but the scholarship required that I live on campus although my grandmother's home was only ten minutes away I lived on campus and so school starts fall you know September and November 18th 2000 overnight even though my grandmother was waiting for me to be to come home for the weekend the house caught on fire her house her house and she didn't make it so and she was she funding year college she was well I got a scholarship but she was definitely my financial support you know she was helping me out and so so again you know I I had a conversation with God like with you like is this a personal vendetta like do we have a problem here right and so but what do you do with that it's like when you get it so that's the question well this thing is okay so can i when you're faced with these kinds and I don't know where this wisdom came from back then okay I can't tell you I mean when what adversity hits there's there's two ways to go it's a fork yes to a lot of a lot of people especially women a lot of women choose to step back right except that I was at the time 18 I made already what a tumor actually somebody's and what we can do at 18 yeah and so I had a double major in Poli Sci and and and business was taking 18 credits I just had to get three jobs took 18 credits I was a bank teller I was a receptionist at a car dealership and I was a French tutor and I pulled myself on my boot strap and I just okay so and that was really this is really important because it's about what it takes it's about what it takes to get through the adversity and often times you know we have a lot of a lot of people in our community they want to be entrepreneurs and then they hit the first roadblock and they quit or things get a little hard and oh what was me it's not gonna work and they quit so to be an entrepreneur to be successful in anything you've got to be willing to do whatever it takes and that's what that's what I'm hearing you say I just had I had to be willing to do whatever it took what it took was three jobs what it took was getting all these credits uh-huh and so I'm seeing that the adversity that's happening to you throughout this life has actually served you tremendously yeah and I I'll say it and it's gonna sound a little off but I'm thankful for the adversities in my life today because I will be the woman that I am today yeah but for those adversities and you learn from them you grew from them well I always hold on whoever came happens for a reason I don't know what the reason is but I figured you do but most time but back then I didn't know and I was like you know what I'm gonna figure it out but for now since I can't figure it out I'm just I keep going and truly and honestly I wanted to make my dad proud yeah there's something about that for a little girl oh yeah me too so yeah and it's like okay you know and you know now I say this all the time life doesn't happen to you it happens for you I repeat that a lot because life has happened for me it's served me yeah although they were you know they were blows they served me very well I wouldn't have the hustle that I have you know how did he had I had a dad funding my school yes grandmother giving your funding correct so I had so you got your it and you got these lessons early on which actually is pretty pretty cool that you could get this character trait and get these this this mindset of I'm gonna do whatever it takes at that young age because often I see women who have got in an easy life they haven't had the adversity and then when something happens they are just they fall apart especially as they get older so yeah I can see how this has served you tremendously yeah okay so okay so then what happens so now you're gonna batter for guys I yeah I do that so my last semester in college I intern on Capitol Hill with Congressman angle and I'm like okay everyone always told me that I talk a lot I should go to law school I like okay we'll do that and I figured you know if I'm gonna go for a graduate degree you know it's a sure it's a sure bet to just go to law school get a Juris Doctor you know that'll definitely make my dad proud right so I decided to take a year off after college I worked in the city and mid Manhattan just to pay for my wedding because back then are you getting married I was getting married I got I got engaged right out of out of college and so what are you met in college I met yes and so I met him in college great guy you know so we got married moved to South Florida and attended Nova Southeastern University for three years you know full-time and I graduated law school congratula I don't thank you I took the bar exam and before the bar results came out I found out I passed the pregnancy test which you should know Ricky law you're a woman lawyer in 2008 when the market is no bueno for anything I know it's not medically correct but know if you're pregnant and you're aspiring lawyer then they're gonna they're gonna take that into account and that's gonna be a real negative right it really was and my and I had gotten the job when most of my friends couldn't even get jobs from the attorney that I had clerked with my last semester in law school and so he was not happy about it because of course you know the 16-hour days that he expected for me I was sleepy you know you've been down that road I have not cuz I don't have kids oh no kids so I ate all day okay I was sleeping all the time and you know I was just not well I didn't I wasn't able to put all these hours of work that he wanted from me and so that pissed him off inside a horrible first year in an in a first working year corporate and so it just literally took me that year to know that I was psychologically unemployable okay I was like it's not my thing I do I can't work very well for people okay so you're pregnant so I'm pregnant I have my son and you're not working I'm not working I have three months of maternity leave technically that I had saved for of course way before the three months came my money was running out and I had to really decide am I gonna go back to work for this not so nice person we're not gonna say the words that really did come to mind and put my kid in daycare and you know miss out on all the milestones just to pay for daycare or am I going to do something and I honestly was a I was willing to do anything legal to just stay home and and be able to you know pay him for my bills cuz Sallie Mae came calling for her money back you know for my student loans and I tell a case called okay and their student loans your husband working he was working he was working for an insurance company and you still wanted to make your own money absolutely you didn't want to be dependent on him well I was never yeah and even when I was in law school I took extra loaned out to pay for myself cause I have a mouth on me I couldn't have somebody tell me that they did for me you don't like being told what to do yes so um so here I am you know when my backs against the wall one of the things that I do is pray so prayed really hard and I literally was at a target and a woman walks up to me and offers me a facial with Mary Kay Cosmetics okay okay and by the end of my time with her I was a Mary Kay consultant uh-huh I had told my boss that I was not coming back and um five years later three free cars drove my pink hat a lot got my diamond a my first six figures at Mary Kay and my Mary Kay Mundy money funded my law firm okay so there okay so so some of you may not know who Mary Kay is Mary Kay is a huge company it's international it's a network marketing company and actually when I was in-between jobs after I got fired for the second time from my job I actually went into network marketing as well and great great great education because if it's a really good company like Mary Kay is they teach you about sales they teach you about business but they also teach you how to grow yourself absolutely that's what is most important because when you got to go knock on doors that's what scares the heck out of people have to go phone calls because of my time and Mary Kay having to empower women yeah to help them stay the course cuz many times your walk you're literally talking people off the ledge yeah like whoa old and I'm sure the Mary Kay training helped you with in terms of running the business of the law of course because law school does not teach you anything about that course now is I have a course that's what I do you know how to build a six-figure law practice in six months I teach it's called leap into your life okay I teach lawyers now how to do exactly what I would be it how to run a business break I take 11 years off their learning curve because I just made 11 years with their mistakes it's gonna be 11 years in January and that's and that's important because we always say we want to learn from real teachers not fake teachers and so there's a lot of you know school everything I could do Mia even though they say academia is full you know they have entrepreneurship classes the most times 99% of the times the people teaching those classes have never had a business they don't know what it takes to be an entrepreneur they don't know what it takes to face the problems every day they don't know what it takes to make payroll when you don't have the income coming in and so those are all the things that are really important and I know in the professional professions of law and doctors and so many other realms like Noah dentists has no it had no clue how to run the business you know they're all great technicians and practitioners but they don't have the business skills so I'm happy to hear that you're teaching other lawyers how to build a business because you want to find a mentor if you're going to build a business that's doing what it is you're doing that's I think one of the keys to success is a mentor who's doing what it is you want to and who can who's willing to work with you to help grow not just your business but to grow you as a person correct it's a good job good job so you got divorced what happened there I have another book coming out called what's it called why I had to leave a good man I had to leave a good man so no amazing guy right but I got married age 22 years old I didn't know who I was at 22 years old we have two beautiful children Hildur they ten and five and I got to a point with him where you know I kind of the writing has been on the wall right and the writing's on the wall like in blood perf years yeah and I remember specifically even having a conversation with him about five years ago and I would say to him I'm like if you don't start growing there's gonna be a day I'm gonna say something to you and you're not gonna understand what I'm saying I could see it you know I was reading a lot I was growing you so you were growing and he wasn't exactly he was gonna do things like they were saying about Mary Kay you know you do a lot of personal development and actually what happened with me was one day when I was in my pink Cadillac I pull up in front of Starbucks to go speak to a woman who was interested in starting the business and this guy was at Starbucks start speaking to me we're really good friends today but he started just as something about us clicked he started sharing what was about a terabyte of personal development material with me so I became a student of this stuff yeah and I thought I was 31 years old when I found out I had a subconscious mind I'm like why didn't he tell so much peaceful here if I knew but I guess they didn't know either and so um I I started really studying this stuff and so of course if you're not if your partner is not growing with growing with you the language starts changing how you attract how you see things obviously you start seeing things differently you start understanding your awareness your awareness level starts to rise I mean if his isn't or hers isn't it's very very difficult to have those conversations it's very difficult to get excited about life of your somebody else along with you right and so and again it's not something that he intended to do but he turned out to be he got to a point where he had a problem for every solution and I'm over here you know looking to attract bigger and you know open my horizons and it's like there's always gonna be an issue yeah going on in your own head if somebody else is telling you why it's not gonna where it's not unless it's really good constructive feedback that is like comes from experience right and comes from him or her doing what it is you she's doing it can be it can be really destructive okay let me ask you this now single mom so you're single mom so I remember Robert telling me about his rich tenants poor dad and he said his rich dad would his poor dad would say the reason I'm not rich is because I have you kids and rich dad would say the reason I must be rich is because I have you kids and it's all a mindset shift right so how do you as a single mom going through what you do how are you raising your kids and what advice I don't really like the word advice but what would you say to women who are single moms who maybe are having a tough time with the single mom piece and the working and trying to you know pay the bills and all of that you know everyone was asked it was telling me that I was crazy that you know you're such a good man and you should stay for the kids I said I'm leaving for my kid yes there you go what did you see I what did you see what happened with the kids if you stayed I saw Mike the limit the limitations not being able to show them the other way of doing things the way that you know that expansive that you're creating your life and I didn't want my kids to think that thinking small and you know thinking that things were difficult or whatever that that was true because it's excuse my friends you know it's you come out here and you create what you want to create in your life and if something is holding you back not working for you you could cut it off that's it I was born alone I'm not yeah I met my my ex-husband he was a great guy we spent you know a total of 18 years together 13 years married but when it's to stop working it stopped working like working yeah so let me ask you this four women who are out there right now watching this and maybe they're having they're struggling in their marriage with kids or without kids but they know it's not working yet financially they're afraid to leave because if they leave they don't know if they can take care of themselves financially it's kind of a leap of faith right if they were gonna cut that cord then they're gonna cut their financial cord and a lot of women are in that situation they're in bad marriages they're in unhealthy marriages or marriages that don't serve them but they're afraid to leave because of the money what would you say to them choose you love you enough respect you enough your happiness is what's going to magnetize you to be able to create these these vehicles that will then provide financial support for that decision I had to trust that you know I would be supported if I was you know if I put myself in alignment with what was making me happy my kids are happier because I'm happier yeah I was not not I would start you know I I got to open a really good point where I snapped at my son and I was like you know it's not me I've never wanted to be the mom that I was being I was frustrated I wasn't nice anymore I wasn't well and I can't be well for anyone if I'm not well with myself yeah so it is true I mean the most important person in your life and I don't mean this to be selfish or anything but the most important person in your life is you absolutely yep or from an empty cup yeah you have to your kids are important right what you're saying is if you're not healthy and if you're not happy and if you're not doing what is what is the what is the message you're sending to your kids so I know I can tell you a couple right now and he's in a horrible marriage and he doesn't want to leave because of the kids the kids know what's going on it's feeling kid today you know they know they see it they hear the fights they know they get in I mean my son has told me many time was over you know that he's not happy that we broke up but he's kind of happy that he has this version of mom yeah you know we do more we travel more it was so much more fun yeah so was it easier to make the decision because you felt financially that you could take care of yourself I always took care of myself so that was not an issue that was never an issue if they're right if a woman has an issue right now and she's afraid that she can't what does she do what would you what you the first thing is get financially independent it's extremely important I don't believe I don't believe in being in a relationship that is codependent in any way I don't want to co depend on you financially we don't need to Co depend on each other emotionally it's two whole people who are self-sufficient loves themselves you know I don't find you you anything to complete me I'm whole and complete your whole and complete and we're doing this partnership thing so what I'm hearing and this is I mean this is my message to for a rich woman everywhere is a woman cannot be free unless she's also financially free but a lot of that freedom comes from the personal development work that we all want ourselves absolutely because without that this is going to get in your way emotions are going to get in your way you're gonna stay with people you don't want to stay with so it for me in business it's always personal development financial development as well as business development yeah have you put those three together but the but the personal development piece has got to be so much about it's something that you have anyway it's just every single day absolutely it's just like you brushing your teeth every day you know it's like you got to do it every time every single time I'd ask my how you doing today hanging in there like really hanging in there yeah hanging in there I'm like well that's not much of a life to be hanging in there like just get me through the next day where I want to be around people that are excited about what they're doing every day and who are going to support and empower me as well as I support and empower them so I think one of the keys to that for women if they're in a relationship they don't want to be in or if they're in a they don't want to be in or if they're in a situation and any means that they don't want to be in really really important to surround yourself with people that are like-minded that want to help you achieve your dreams while you assist them and achieving their dreams I mean do you have that support network I only stay plugged in with people that that are like that yeah yeah people have fallen away many people have fallen away as you know as I've grown how lovely over there yeah like I could love you at a distance I don't know every day I but you know Kim my perspective on life is a bit different and maybe you know someone could use that perspective and borrow that perspective what is that my father being murdered at 42 years old he had plans that afternoon he had plans for his life he had travel plans with his wife later on and you know my dad would always say to us don't ever look at my money okay don't ever look at my money I'll give you discipline and education but my money is my money and I'm gonna go and I'm gonna blow it with my wife right it's so you would say that's my sister and is healthy so we never we never thought we were gonna get anything anyway right and so um when someone that you see full of life gets murdered at 42 years old that's why my book is entitled 28,000 days that's what you've got we're not getting out of here alive we're all going a thousand days of summing nature it's about 75 years and if the average lifespan of a human being right and so you're not getting out of here alive you're on borrowed time today is the day it's the gift it's today and so if you don't get that and you're here wasting time you're hanging in there or being in an unhappy relationship like I have too much respect for myself and for the little bit of time that I know that I'm here that I'm not going to allow myself to stay a day more in a situation that doesn't serve me or doesn't bring me joy because of what because of what money health insurance I mean I've people who said what are you gonna do with for health insurance my joint oh really you're gonna stay in a relationship for health insurance I could think you're worth more than that and so you know for me Mary Kay like I said she was my kid to entrepreneurship I always say I bought my freedom for a hundred bucks yeah that was what my starter kit Casa you also were also willing to do what it takes to get yourself well cuz my why was big what was your wife my why was my kids I don't want my son and see that we didn't even talk to and I know we have to wrap it up here very quickly but we didn't even get to that because everybody needs to have everybody should have a why why are you pushing yourself why do you want to be financially independent why do you want to have your own business and a lot of people go oh I just want to I just want to pay the bills no no you're gonna pay I just pay the bills fund my kids whole life policies so that when they need something I don't know about anyone I want take out I didn't have that freedom I want trying freedom its money freedom I wanna you know go to give on chief you know I like I like my things I like to travel I want to put my kids are both in Catholic school like that's important to me I received that education I wanted to give it to them my ex-husband said to me I can't afford it I said well then don't worry about it you know I wanted to I walked out of the house and I said listen you can keep everything I don't even watch child support I just went out you know and I love you over there right and then I just got my stuff I set myself up I got my fight today so today you still practicing law absolutely no practicing law yeah you have a foundation I have a company called the empowerment Institute no what I do is I women I empower women I empower I mean I do a lot of coaching I do a lot of seminars and things like mostly what women have my heart right and so from Mary my Mary Kay days there are the ones who showed me that I even had that gift I didn't even know that I could do this work until I was in Mary Kay and women would come into my meetings that didn't even belong to my unit and they just were like you know my director says in a way but when you say it I get it and so I was like okay well maybe there's something there so you want to empower women also to be rich women absolutely and rich and always possible absence just financially but financially is a huge piece of it it's financially is what enslaves us often listen I wouldn't be here if I couldn't financially be here right everything you experience in life tomorrow I'm doing all the souls self-care retreat all day to pay for that you know it's not a matter of money to just stock and you know put under your mattress this is what it's a vehicle it's a it's a tool that allows you to experience what life has to offer so final words to people watching what wherever they're at their lives versus choose you choose you choose happiness choose flow because then everything else starts literally banging at your door you know right this has been my best year and I've worked the absolute least but I was in alignment the most I've ever been so by the blessings will literally chase you down if you can just put yourself in that space of happiness of wholeness and and you know just be unencumbered if something doesn't feel good it doesn't belong in your experience drop it Thanks well thank you thank you as you are you do embody the the whole rich woman phenomena and what I wanted what I want to say to women and to everybody watching is I think the most important thing is the personal development of yourself is is so important because that's what's going to get you through the adversity and the adversity to me that you talked about is probably best the biggest gift that we have in our lives is that adversity because when you come up against a problem when you come up against an obstacle if you back down from it there's no growth nothing happens if you say I can't do this nothing happens but when you break through when you work through the obstacle when you overcome the adversity that's where growth happens that's where the joy comes from that's where the magic happens and so for anybody out there who has a dream who has they know their life can be better in many ways but they haven't yet been willing to take that leap to take that step and now might be your time so I encourage you to go for your dreams don't let the obstacles don't get let the adversity get in your way in sted use the obstacles and use the adversity to have the freedom that you want in your life so thank you Cara a pleasure you're really a joy pleasure bullet wonderful to talk with you and we'll talk again yes absolutely thank you very much for watching [Music] you

Channel: The Rich Dad Channel

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Keywords: TheRichDadChannel, robert, kiyosaki, rich dad poor dad, motivational speakers, business ideas, make money, network marketing, how to make money, how to invest, passive income, cashflow game, rich dad channel, kim kiyosaki, kara vaval, overcoming adversity, financial freedom, personal development for women, personal development, personal development motivation, transform your life

Id: _a04BrZsA60

Length: 33min 46sec (2026 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 21 2020