Morbius — How to Get Bullied by the Internet | Anatomy Of A Failure

subject 117 has resulted in failure morbius is a new sony superhero origin story about dr michael morbius a man who injects himself with bad genes to become the batman no to become morbius as you may have heard this movie did break all khan's records at the box office whereas avengers endgame made a respectable 3 billion us dollars more bs flew in and made 300 billion more bs dollars but even though this film did become a massive financial hit even though every person on earth did go see it five or six times i'd argue that it still isn't exactly a full-on success see despite morbid selling 20 more billion tickets in its opening weekend once the headlines simmer down and people actually start to see the film the general consensus quickly started to turn for the worse people just weren't too pleased with the quality they got compared to the quality they had been expecting i mean most common reactions that i saw people expressed were essentially this and this and this and this [Applause] yeah so mostly more bs became a laughingstock of the internet that everybody was making fun of there was already some of that based on the trailers but once the movie came out it was all over oh look i want to see morbius and there's just one other guy here oh look the theater didn't even bother turning off the lights from orbeez oh look i had two thiggs of morbius in my car and someone broke in and left four more oh this movie was so good that it cured my insomnia thank you morbius [Music] and having finally seen the movie myself i can indeed understand where that demeaning reaction is coming from because the movie across many of its main movie-making pillars is pretty bland and boring the title character is as fascinating as my carpet the story and events are so shallow it's like they just want to be over and overall morbius feels like it's two decades past this time if there is a cinematic experience that's made to be the butt of jokes it's this one and so today let's look deeper into some of those main pillars of cinema that morpheus dropped the ball on the hero the scenes the feel of the whole thing if you don't want to make it easy for the internet to make fun of your movie here's a few key things to keep in mind oh and also because i am still kinda jealous of all the money made by morbis i'll be once again shouting out a filamento ally from the past but i'll do that after we first talk about the hero so no need to skip just yet [Music] the reason michael morbis himself became an easy target online is because he's someone that heroes and superheroes especially cannot be an unspecial unmotivated black shell the first part is is that there's nothing uniquely special about morbius to make him stand out as a character among all these others essentially his signature gist is that he's a brilliant medical doctor which is never proven we learn that he's a doctor in the very first scene by way of him saying it are you a doctor i am a doctor after that we see a flashback where a young morbius is joined at a hospital by another kid who apparently just dies right away and then morby saves him by fixing a machine it took a team of scientists to build that machine and you fixed it with the ballpoint pen which again doesn't really help because it makes him more like a brilliant technician than medically skilled and after that all the doctor even morbius does is the same kind of fairy dust he saves dying patience by just injecting them with a sedative he makes genetic breakthroughs by just sitting in front of a computer i mean his biggest achievement is inventing artificial blood development of artificial blood has saved more lives than penicillin which we never actually see him invent or modify or do anything about the only real visible dr work morbius does is cutting open a tiny animal which i did back in high school so he's not really a brilliant medical doctor as much as he's a movie character posing as one i am a doctor and why don't you back it up with a source my source is that i made it there is also his unique blood disease condition but mostly it's more the same it's never fully explained what that condition is or how it works and why it's so dangerous or how exactly your bad gene is going to magically make his blood better outside of whatever generic terminology vampire genes into your dna would allow your body to produce those same anticoagulants yes it would be a cure it's just like yeah it's this terrible rare blood condition that's very terrible we don't have much time left there's something missing from our dna this could be our last chance like a piece of a puzzle which again seems as fake as morbius's role as a doctor meaning that really the only unique specialty about morbius is that he's disabled which is useful to mine sympathy from the audience but not quite strong enough alone to build a hero that can stand out on top of that morbius is also very unmotivated because his goals are weak or non-existent essentially his initial goal is to find the cure for his condition but like i mentioned not only is the condition very generically fake it's also never established why he needs a cure we never see what it is that morbis wants to do that his condition keeps him from we don't see him wanting to run but being unable to we don't get any kind of character shaping dream like the way arthur fleck wants to be a comedian more than anything else no morby is just once a cure to help people and to not be disabled anymore not for some specific in-game reason but because you know it's what it is what it is yes and once that goal is reached and more base becomes super buff as intended then there's nothing he has all these powers but nothing to use them for he doesn't need them to get money for a car to impress a girl he doesn't need them to catch his uncle's killer he doesn't need them to destroy his own past mistakes no he kind of just waits and hangs around until the plot advances to a point where he can start reacting to things with his powers got a couple more questions meaning that morbius overall is an unmotivated passive hero pushed by the plot and on top of that morbius's personality is also very weak and reserved and small for example when he starts testing out his powers he does it in the safety of his lab which isn't exciting or interesting it's boring i've even developed a form of echolocation bad radar for the uninitiated you've got a bad ass over here and boring's the kind of person morbius is he doesn't see conflict he doesn't get himself into situations he's not making big choices driven by strong willpower he does occasionally do something yeah but not when compared to tony stark for example tony's always getting himself into situations and conflict he's always the driving force in the room when he tests out his new superhero skills he takes it to the moon record big swing flight is eighty-five thousand pizzas made to be broken this is a strong larger than life personality that audiences find interesting this is a weak wimpy personality that very easily puts them to sleep that's not to be outside when school gets out a strong-willed loudmouth physical weakling will always be more exciting than a puff dude who drifts with the out of wind in whatever way possible maybe this is where i belong if i'm in here then nobody else dies [Applause] and when you put together this holy trinity of non-uniqueness and passiveness and weakness of personality you get a superhero who's not super or a hero he's an empty canvas that's very easy for the internet to paint over but if you need one more outside the box example to put this in a nutshell here's one that does my shout out at the same time look at this blue bun this is a real character constructed from all necessary elements it's very uniquely special because when you press it it changes your internet location to anywhere around the world and it also has a powerful motivation to do so so that you can unlock all geographically divided content in streaming services to see everything plus so that you can surf the web without being seen by evil forces and it also has a strong willpower personality because right now it's willing to serve you at a discounted price to prove itself this bun worthy of its own movie is called surf shark the number one hero vpn you already know why you need it so all you need to know is that you can get it for 83 off with three months for free by using code film at the link below and also for every use of the code i'll be donating 1000 morbius bucks to charity donating meaning pledging meaning that i'm not going to pay anything to anyone [Music] the reason the contents of the movie became easy pickings for the internet is because in many ways those contents are lacklusterly non-entertainingly low effort the first big issue is that mostly the movie isn't made of scenes but rather moments of information the most obvious manifestation of this being exposition of which there is a lot whether it's generic talk of the conditions technicalities until they find it the only way to stay alive is an oil change three times a day or it's talk of morbius's unseen achievements assist himself as the world's leading authority on bloodborne diseases or it's talk of morbius's project viruses insinuating their nucleic acid onto our or whether it's morby is literally talking exposition to himself artificial blood keeps me stable for six hours but that window is growing shorter there's way too much of characters explaining things nobody wants to listen to a wikipedia page of a movie they want to see and experience the movie but aside from pure exposition this also means scenes that exist solely to move us to the next step in a story when morbius goes to the dangerous bats in the beginning he doesn't need to survive their attack somehow we cut away and then he just has them when he goes to ask his friend for help he doesn't need to convince him or anybody else and it has to be done in international waters which is cut to him having what he needs when he conducts his experiment he doesn't need to do anything he just waits for the computer and then allows himself to be injected and there you go now he's morbius you know scenes are not treated as their own entertaining challenges that the hero needs to overcome they're just brief moments of information that move us to the next one some friends i brought back from costa rica and if most of your movie is like that then the only reason to watch it is to see it in [Music] even when there occasionally are scenes about situations to overcome there's still the issue that things are way too easy all morbius has to do to save this girl is give her a sedative all he needs to do to break out of jail is jump out the window all he needs to do to convince his lab partner to help is ask once all he needs to do to take over this criminal laboratory is play around if you don't treat your obstacles as real obstacles odds are that the scenes themselves won't feel real either but on top of information and challenge there's also other types of issues like some scenes being isolated events without a larger through line for example when morbius conducts the experiment that turns him into morbius what happens is that the crewmen attack him out of fear and then he kills all of them which is cool but still quite artificially forced cause why does the crew of a shipping vessel carry rifles why are they all so eager to fight as if they're soldiers instead of sailors like this whole situation feels very random one survivor of eight bodies running ids right now but apparently they all shop at the same mercenary supply store eight dead mercs on a boat pretty sure they were guilty of something and happy to have them off the water how do you think that looks and as an example of how a through line could fix this what if you use the idea that morbius's friend is financially mixed up with the wrong people oh i won a hand of cards against some russian gentlemen apparently they found his luck improbable what if the russian mob is tired of the french games and they're finally coming for their money that funded morbius's project now morbius wouldn't be fighting random armed crewmen he'd be fighting the antagonistic force that's been in play all along now morbius wouldn't be learning about a random criminal lab randomly in a back to the lab cafe be taking overlap left behind by the russians as he deals with them you know you have the same scenes but there's this longer underlying through line to tie them together and make them organic and to build on that most scenes also lack a fire burning underneath what is a big rush with morbius's experiment he's been living with this condition for decades we don't have much time left why what's the big rush with the friend getting the powers he's got nothing specific to use them for i need it i can't live like this any longer why overall things don't happen out of urgent necessity like norman osborne doing his test before getting pushed out forever no things just happen as one last issue i'd also say that scenes about fighting lack the thing to fight for morbius clashes with his friend for example it's not like oh the friend is about to use his new powers to kill this russian mobster who has always demeaned him and morbis has to stop him from becoming a murderer no the friend kills some guy for no reason and then they fight over different opinions and more people get killed in the process even at the end they're not fighting for anything tangible there's no bucky here morbius isn't for example trying to stop the friend from killing every bystander he sees they're just fighting out their differences until one of them goes down and i'm not exaggerating when i say that pretty much all scenes in this movie fall under one or more of these issues some scenes are better than others but none of them are built into anything genuinely good they mostly exist just to end and when the internet senses low quality from low effort like this they pounce [Music] perhaps the biggest reason why morbius became such an easy target for snarky on the remarks is the fact that it feels two decades past its time it does a lot of things that just don't fly anymore there are some very superficial examples of this like how the cgi is really bad morbius looks more fake in the dark than davy jones did in sunlight in 2006. on top of which we have a mandatory childhood problems flashback that's really cringy and boring on top of which even more beast's transformation journey is quite a bit like norman osborne's except a lesser version like i mentioned two weeks we'll have lost the contractor quest and oscorp will be dead we don't have much time left why but a more major example of this is the hero's incredibly shallow key relationships of which there are two one of the key side characters is morbius's lab assistant who is nothing more she doesn't have her own agency or motivation she doesn't have her own life with her own problems we have no idea who she is as a person outside of morbia's story her only reason for existence is to be there to say yes to morbius can you do that for me yes i can't but you didn't answer my question what is it and be a nice looking trophy for him to win at the end she doesn't fight or even help in the fight she just dies so that morbius can be angry a lot of interest like this might have passed the bs meter in early 2000s but not anymore same with morbius's childhood friend who is a bit better due to him struggling with this disability like morbius but that's about it we don't know anything about his life outside of morbius apparently he's rich but never mind what that means outside of being able to fund more bs's project apparently he has trouble with gambling but never mind because it goes nowhere apparently he wants powers but without anything to do with them he's not trying to take revenge on specific bullies who have kept him down there's not enough here to realistically make him hate people as a whole he just starts killing random guys from club douche bags to police officers after which he moves to killing people close to human morbius not accidentally in the heat of the moment or something but just because he's the villain i'm gonna kill as many as i want a very terrible early 2000s villain who exists only to be stopped by the hero aside from key relationships other characters are also affected by the issue that they're not people as manchester embodiments of the plot for example there's this pair of detectives investigating the murders on the ship who immediately for no reason get a major hard-on for morbius you also work at the horizon lab with dr michael morbius as in these detectives see weird bodies beside a website and then right away get the idea that oh yeah the disabled guy must have turned into a super killer why do you ask you've been looking for a cure for your condition your whole life right i mean you pretty much tried everything crazy experiments yeah you're coming with us what well i'm out man like no the only reason they're suspicious of morbius is because that's the plot they don't do detective work as much as they find excuses to move things forward and it's not just plot it's how a lot of events and instances overall feel artificially generated you know we have kids bullying disabled kids for no established reason we have police breaking into civilian apartments without any kind of warrant or probable cause we have prison visitors bringing stuff in in their pocket we have ship crewmen instantly using lethal force on another human as if they already know what happened to him look out it's a morbius i'm not saying this stuff can't happen but i am saying it needs to be realistically justified like if you want to explore the dark side of being disabled then do it how about road rage incident where a truck driver honks at morbius and his friend for crossing the road on a red light because they were too slow to cross on a green that i can see i understand why the driver is being a douche i understand why the situation sucks i understand why after years of this the friend would begin to lose himself to rage given a chance but older kids bullying a disabled kid for no evident reason whatsoever that just looks and feels awkward the audience might have been more blind to this stuff two decades ago but the internet has put a stop to that you simply cannot get away with this kind of artificial bs anymore and if you choose to try nonetheless just like with morbius social media will be out for blood [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Filmento

Views: 1,937,388

Keywords: morbius, morbius movie, morbius 2, morbius bad movie, morbius full movie, everything wrong with morbius, morbius honest trailers, morbius funny moments, morbius dance, morbius clips, morbius only action, morbius memes, morbius after credits, morbius post credits, morbius best moments, morbius funny, morbius mistakes, movie mistakes, bad movies, morbius sequel, morbius vulture, morbius spider-man, morbius fight scene, morbius flying

Id: cK_PS9HXE84

Length: 19min 24sec (1164 seconds)

Published: Sat May 28 2022