Minions: The Rise of Gru is pretty dumb...

oh you're really not as smart as I thought you were I guess I gave you too much credit what have you done what's black and blue and dead all over you if you think you can stop let's go what have you done oh my God the movie's fine yeah it's not really that bad this is like the second time I'm talking about an elimination movie and in both times I'm actually giving it a pass like I said before it's elimination it's harmless it's not really that good it's not really that bad it's just I think the reason why my standards are so low with their movies is because I know they're going to give me something in the bare minimum they know their demographic they know what makes them tick and they know what makes them money which they did Brothers they beat Disney in the box office [ __ ] Disney not to mention the tick tock Trend where people actually went to watch the minion movie for the sake of the meme which I'll be honest I may be guilty of also participating here but hey that's neither here or there so with that said the movie's fine sir there are some setups that essentially have no payoff a bunch of missed opportunities and a lot of stuff happened that are pretty much pointless but overall it doesn't really ruin the movie for they had a product they delivered and it's passable sadly but what exactly are these setups missed opportunities and pointlessies that I'm talking about well that's what we're here for today let's sit back relax and grab a banana and take a look at minions the rise of Gru [Music] get it because it's a minion movie they transform their logo into the word minion to further signify that they made the minions the movie starts off by introducing us to the main villains The Vicious six now a lot of things happen in the first five to six minutes into the movie they essentially use it to set up a plot device that the characters will eventually chase after in the majority of the movie but right off the bat I do have a few problems here and there like what we're actually introduced to each member of the vicious 6. I'm saying to do so very lightly who are these people what's their story who gives a [ __ ] they don't matter one bit yeah I'm saying this now but besides wild Knuckles he's the old guy the rest of the members really don't matter up until the final fight at the end of the movie which is quite the concern when wild Knuckles gets kicked out in the first five minutes so basically the only interesting and entertaining person in the group isn't even in the group but anyways back to the movie we see Wild Knuckles successfully stealing an item called the Zodiac Stone out loud I have no idea why he went all alone by the way they clearly established that he's in a group a group that can easily overpower these robot minions but hey you know what you do you I guess I have a bunch of deadly trotskies on my face get it cause she's a nun kill me now turns out though shockingly a group of untrustworthy people can't be trusted as they betray wild Knuckles and steal the Zodiac Stone right under his nose and leave him for Dead Brother help me the king meanwhile back in the city we finally get to meet our main characters the Minions from the last movie Kevin Stewart and Bob and group yup following the ending from the last movie our fellow yellow headaches finally found their new boss and it comes in the form of a little kid named Gru ji so they established that Gru's going to an addition for a spot in the vicious 6 that wild Knuckles used to be in they also throw in this line where the group is going to unleash the power of the zodiac Stone during Chinese New Year so keep that in mind because shocker wild Knuckles is alive and well and back in the city too God damn how the [ __ ] did you make it back to the city you were all alone back there we also get introduced to a new character in the franchise Otto he is get this a minion who is so annoying that he actually annoys the other minions oh [ __ ] where is he in the other movies and why are we only getting to know him now who [ __ ] cares we have another Minion we can make merchandise out of toys toys toys toys toys toys but before you go hitting on me let me just say this one thing I actually don't find auto that annoying in fact give props to illumination here they kind of found a way to properly utilize the minions in this movie for the most part unless you're really invested in the Zodiac storyline which I highly doubt you are although is it really much of a bother as the movie sets him up to be the main reason why the other minions dislike him is because he talks too much the minions hating another Minion for talking too much at this point after watching all those movies you just grow numb through your gibberish so Otto being an idiot doesn't really stand out as much even his design is pretty generic he's just a bigger rounder minion with braces oh you speak gibberish rely on slapstick comedy and his utterly clumsy Beyond relief so you're basically like every other minion then on to the next day and Gru is off to meet with the vicious six I would say you got the rocks in your head but now I'm 11 and 3 Converses amazing a lot more sense eleven and three quarters wait a minute back in the previous movie you met the minions in 1968. this movie takes place in 1976. if you're 11 now mathematically that would mean you were canonically three years old in this scene that's a pretty old looking toddler there huh guys kind of a major detail to miss their High elimination well anyways gruel gets rejected for being too young so out of spite this happens foreign oh no the Zodiac Stone someone stop him before he what does the stone do exactly what is that a kid yeah a kid in a music store never heard such a thing oh poor helpless grow trying to outrun a gang of supervillains in a bike oh the horror oh the stress oh if only he had a vehicle that could transform into something like a jet plane you know like the one he had in the first movie well anyways they would actually end up shaking off the vicious six but although like an idiot would carelessly trade a zodiac stone for an actual stone did you just trade my future foreign where was this birthday party all right here's another gripe I have with this movie grew is too nice here what do I mean by that well it makes sense for older glue to soften up a bit that was pretty much the whole point of the first Despicable Me movie especially with the girls but this is an 11 year old group we're talking about here there's no reason for him to be as soft as he is if anything he has to be more diabolical than ever have you met 11 year old kids they're the pure bacon of chaos there's Satan in a little man's body so seeing him being friendly and goody goody doesn't really make sense there are multiple scenes where he's just being too nice to someone so when Otto traded in the Zodiac Stone in which he nearly got killed for by the way for a pet rock firing them and walking out is it really despicable of him if you ask me help it's Universal tried to kidnap me they want to make a spin-off so grow would get kidnapped by wild Knuckles and after finding out that he doesn't have the stone either he demands the minions to find it and deliver it to him in San Francisco or as the minions call it San Francisco that's pretty cute not gonna lie in order to save their boss so the minions technically split up here the three main guys Kevin Stewart and Bob instead of finding the stone choose to travel to San Francisco instead and break grew out meanwhile Otto gets his own storyline where he chases down a motorcyclist wearing the stone and so hijinks ensue when you're getting off to it's your lucky day Chad I'm headed up the coast I could drop your phone away oh what a coincidence back to grew storyline after a series of events wild Knuckles would end up bonding with Gru and actually agree to Mentor him does that mean the Zodiac Stone will be the conflict that will come between their newfound friendship nope it won't in fact they pretty much forget about it almost immediately immediately kids I actually have a son of my own wait a minute Vector the [ __ ] is he doing here isn't he supposed to be like a decade younger than grow isn't that the whole point of his character in the first Despicable Me movie if goo is 11 here that would mean Vector should 100 still be inside his dad's balls or somehow I completely misread the first movie and apparently these two are supposed to be the same [ __ ] age back to Kevin Stewart and Bob they're still on their way to San Francisco and I'm not gonna lie their storyline is without a doubt the best one out of the three which isn't really saying much it's like telling me the pick between wet garbage poop and vomit they're all still pretty bad their story is to Simply find and save Gru from Wild Knuckles which means they have to go from point A to point B which I gotta say elimination did a pretty good job keeping it as entertaining as it could be as far as minion standards could go foreign die they go as far as nearly murdering a kid stealing a plane endangering everyone's lives learning Kung Fu their plotline is just bad [ __ ] wall to wall chaos that honestly perfectly suits the minions oh and the Kung Fu thing yeah they devote a lot of time with this plotline which somewhat goes nowhere they meet an old Guru and she promises to help them train to fight off the bad guys why I will teach you they don't learn jack [ __ ] by the way okay technically they do learn something they do find their inner Beast later in the movie but other than that it's pretty much just a montage of the minions getting their ass handed to them scene by scene which in all honesty was really fun to watch thank you so meanwhile back at Drew's home the vicious six find out that Gru is with wild Knuckles so off they go to San Francisco as well we're going to San Francisco let's hit it [Music] that's right boys God is real and he's working for the vicious sex kinda ruins your whole hell in heaven Motif now doesn't it so basically what happens next is that the vicious ticks get to Wild knuckles's home and completely demolish the thing trying to find him and up here are you sure he might be doubting all that rubble from the house that you collapsed stand out and find them [Applause] guys when she said fan out she means to spread out to cover more ground not to go in the same direction as the rest of the crew thank you but lucky they did because for mere seconds later the two casually walk in the completely obliterated building foreign guys the house was like two stories high how did you not notice it gone from a mile away this thought from his home base being destroyed while Knuckles finally gives up and lets Gru go later on though Kevin Stewart and Bob finally get to reunite but that celebration gets cut short as they're interrupted by The Vicious six and here we finally get to see what the Zodiac stone is truly capable of making new minion merch oh my God look at the cute animanians cute minion go cute minion rabbit cute minion chicken even cuter minion chicken buy them now in your local Universal Studios theme park for fifty dollars a pop okay turns out the stone actually has the ability to transform people into either giant monsters or teeny tiny little plushies I don't know how that works but at this point I just want to go home during the middle of the fight while Knuckles would have a change of heart and would try to save Gru now illumination I just want to take a moment and point out a missed opportunity here will not let you hurt that [ __ ] So You're Gonna Save the kid yeah you and what army the minions the minions are an army there's like thousands of them back home why are they not here to fight they know Gru and the rest are in trouble after this scene right in fact what about the robot minions from the start are they just gone did you really set them up to do nothing I have expected it to show up to take back the stone God damn it illumination you could have parody the battle and end game but instead you gave us this okay this Army you're gonna [ __ ] die [Music] they have one big fight in the minions somehow beat the vicious six so they managed to save Gru and take the necklace off the vicious six but all at the cost of wild Knuckles days pass and we get another ending where the minions get the same God knows how many times they've done that already and as one final twist turns out while Knuckles is just fine but I'm going to make you proud I'm going to be the best villain ever because of you kind of a pointless twist to put in there but okay did that minion just come out of the coffin was he going to get buried alive if they didn't accidentally drop it just now why did they feel the coffin up with bananas when no one knew well Knuckles was still alive and why is the guru there she didn't know wild Knuckles and she barely knew Kevin Stewart and Bob these questions are lingering in my mind and I now feel less useful to society you better stay out of trouble kid he was going to be the best all right don't tip tip tip too hard there Buster you're not in the other movie so you're canonically dead I'll just assume Stewart forgot to feed you between this and Despicable Me one [Music] and that was the minions the rise of Gru it exists I guess it's nothing special it's not groundbreaking it's not exceptionally funny but it is self-aware the majority of the movie goes nowhere but at the same time they still serve their purpose to entertain kids there are some jokes here and there that do get a chuckle out of me but other than that it's simply just another illumination movie I really have nothing much to say the voice acting can be bad sometimes but other than that everything is just okay could they have done a better job absolutely did they manage to make it as entertaining as they could sure you could say that and with that you can't really fault them so that's why I'm giving minions the rise of Gru of 5 out of 10. hey guys it's Beenie here thanks for watching I had a lot of fun making this video so if you liked it make sure to click the like button down below and don't forget to subscribe it helps the channel out a lot make sure to follow me on Twitter it's at beanie Brian and if you guys aren't aware I also have a second Channel which I'm still working on by the way I want to make sure that it's a bit different from this channel but also at the same time you know stays on brand so I'm working on that right now and that's about it hope you guys had a great time have a great day and a great life and I'll see you all next time bye

Channel: beaniiebrian

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Id: caXwuh1Ydy4

Length: 17min 24sec (1044 seconds)

Published: Wed Oct 26 2022