Marriage Counsellors Share The Dumbest Appointment Reasons (r/AskReddit Top Posts | Reddit Stories)

marriage counselors have read it what's the stupidest reason a couple has made an appointment couldn't decide on which chicken to buy for their chicken farm sounds like a portlandia sketch law [Music] my specialty is children and families but during the pandemic i was assigned whatever came in because it has been super busy one lady called and spoke with me first about how her husband was horrible at communication and never listened to her she asked for a couple session as soon as she ambushed her husband with her there is a therapist on the line that wants to speak with you her husband screamed you called a therapist because i don't want to pain the house purple she wanted me to convince him to paint the house purple and like any normal human who sees colors he refused to listen to her ah yes the super power of having eyeballs it's always the dishes i don't see couples anymore because i cannot have one more conversation with adult human beings about the various philosophies of dishwashing as a younger person i want to say that the game is rigged we've learned from our parents don't rush into marriage test out sexual compatibility check and check but do you know how long it takes to establish dishwashing compatibility a lot of couples shed your counseling for legitimate reasons like communication issues but then it will come out that the real reason is something stupid and they don't even realize it i had a couple married 25 years who were struggling to connect and it turned out they were resentful of each other because they both wanted to spend various holidays with their families of origin never talked about it never mentioned it just both simmered in silent resentment for 25 years it was resolved so quickly once it was unearthed another couple came in for parenting challenges told me very casually they hadn't had six since their youngest was conceived how old is your youngest 13. both were acting like it was completely normal and fine and unrelated turned out it was not normal and not fine and definitely related referred for sick therapy and heard the whole family happily graduated from therapy within months the entire family was seeking therapy with different counselors for different reasons or so they thought no they were not doing family six therapy i can't believe i just typed family six therapy eater if you are interested in starting six therapy with your partner type in your location here psychological day.com if you have health insurance you can also call the number on the back of your insurance card to ask about mental health coverage they should give you a list of providers find a provider who specializes in couples and start there you might be surprised at what is covered if you don't have insurance and can't afford to pay out of pocket ask the provider about pro bono services or a sliding fee scale never mentioned it just both simmered in silent resentment for 25 years well that's not not communication issues i work with a lot of kids and i see far more stupid reasons that couples have not scheduled an appointment parents spill their guts while explaining what's wrong with their children and 90 percent of the time it's the parents marriage causing issues with the child family this is totally not a catch-all statement because many children have true behavioral emotional challenges separate from their parents marriage but at the same time if you feel like your child is struggling and you have tried everything maybe try marriage counseling eater if you are interested in couples counseling find a provider here psychological decon if you have insurance you can also call the number on the back of your insurance card and ask about mental health coverage find a provider in your network you might be surprised at what is covered if you don't have insurance and can't afford to pay out of pocket ask the provider about pro bono services or a sliding fee scale oh this is so so true lcsw here worked with kiddos and families for a good chunk of my career and 95 of the time if the kid is having issues there's a parenting issue or a marriage partner problem my cousin went to counseling because her husband cuts a sandwich straight inside a diagonal when i first heard it i thought it was a joke my husband now is 32 and won't eat a sandwich unless cut diagonal i made the mistake if cutting it straight once as a prank it wasn't funny you don't mess with his diagonal sandwiches i'm a counselor with teenagers and kids a school staff member dragged these two teens into my office one day a boy and a girl both were clearly upset but definitely didn't want to talk about it with me you could have cut the tension with a knife as they sat frozen in their chair staring at the floor i saw them and thought oh duck she's pregnant i'm trying not to panic at how to handle the situation as i finally get them talking and it turns out they were just fighting because he sent a text to some girl a text at least she wasn't pregnant always a legitimate concern when teens are involved a pimp and one of his six workers scheduled a session to see me because they were having jealousy issues they were legally married and he was unhappy with how she couldn't leave work at work best couple ever what does that mean does she call her clients in her downtime or talk about work with her husband that has so many layers of dysfunction i'm intrigued my anger management group facilitator told us a funny story about a couple that came in for counseling the husband wanted to write a book the wife said she would work and do everything around the house for a year while he worked on his book so he quit work and wrote his book while she did everything the book got published and was a hit the publisher asked him to do a book signing tour the wife was furious she had supported him writing the book and she was done they came to the appointment and explained the situation the therapist asked the wife so what would it take for you to be okay with the book tour she said he tripped to hawaii with my sister the husband was like really done the appointment was over in five minutes edit since a few have asked he couldn't tell us the title of the book due to confidentiality if only it was always that easy a buddy of mine was in therapy with his wife she told me later that my friend let's call him gary has a drinking problem me wait what since when is gary drinking i never saw him drink alcuhole oh that's the problem oh gary i hope you are fine now edit it seems like i worded it in a weird way her issue is that he doesn't drink i once had an ex who was in a tell me i was an alcoholic because i and my family didn't drink much and that was an unhealthy relationship with alcohol the early days of recovery are weird my uncle and his wife reasoning she lost a frying pan i mean i get that it's a stupid argument but how the duck do you lose a frying pan [Music] my sister-in-law made an appointment for marriage counseling because her husband greeted their dog before her when coming home from work i have no option the dogs are literally at the door ready for me to try and not trip over them not a counsellor but my friend is one and a couple came to her unofficially because the wife wouldn't tell her hubby when her mum was coming over because she knew he'd be sick or out that day who was the monster husband or mill not me but my buddy's wife demanded counselling after he refused to fix his habit of leaving the seat up apparently the straw that broke the camel's back was he didn't realize his poo came back up and she fell into the toilet on his old waterlogged sheet they got into a domestic because he wouldn't try her jam we really need a context here though i had a bf for gaslighted and psychologically tortured me four years i remember how he never appreciated anything i did and i was never enough one day i made a special bread for him which took me a whole day to make he never tasted it he said i'm sure it's sheet that was the last straw somehow i found the strength to leave him after that but you can also look at our last moment and say she left nbc he didn't taste her bread from the other side i ran into an ex-girlfriend after being broken up for a long time we decided to go to couples counseling as friends to clarify some stuff from the past we went to the session talked about some heavy stuff but then ended up being very supportive to each other and laughed and stuck up for each other in a weird way at the end the counselor guy was just staring at us sort of dumbfounded and said something along the lines of our you two clearly need to get back together i just remembered his face he was looking at us like we were idiots i think the idea of post-breakup couples counseling as friends might have been a new thing as well update we got back together for about two weeks i was away for work and she went on a vacation with another guy when i find out she said she didn't know she wasn't supposed to we were very much in love for quite a few years but at the end of our relationship she really started acting weird she started acting out in crazy ways cheating at me while i was at work and blaming me she started a weird cross-dresser alter ago she would get mad at me for this that she imagined could happen it got really weird at the end this was five or so years ago last i heard she had quit her job and sort of lives like a hobo a friend of a friend mentioned her one time and i found out she had gotten the dui and had cheated on her current boyfriend the counseling part was still very useful i recommend counseling to anyone who has persistent relationship problems i think the idea of a post-breakup counseling session is not a bad idea either if it was a serious relationship saying things out loud to a stranger can make you realize how dumb a lot of stuff really is i always cherish for good years with that girl we had a very fun and interesting world together i hope she is doing well i learned a lot from that relationship which set me onto the path of a much better life and a much more mature outlook on communication and relationships i've never heard of anyone doing it before but man how nice would that be hey uh i'm still dealing with the breakup oh i'm sorry to hear that i know it hit you hardest inside of the breaking up do you want to set up an appointment with a therapist to see if it'll help you through it i'm more than happy to go hey thanks yeah let's do that if only the majority of life could be so reasonable [Music] i'm not a marriage counselor but i'm in school to be a mental health counselor at the moment my professor has worked in the field for over 30 years and we asked him this question at one point he answered something like this there is no stupid reason to seek out counseling what may seem trivial to one person can completely consume another person what may seem insignificant to you might just be the last straw for a client it's our job to figure out why that stupid reason caused them to land in your care sometimes it's a lot of minor things that build up because they don't have any good coping mechanisms sometimes it's a major problem that they don't want to talk about so they start small sometimes it's something they don't even realize is a problem but is causing them distress regardless there's a lot of reasons why clients might present you with something that seems completely insignificant but the fact is they are in front of you paying you money so that you can help them improve their mental health 99 of the time that means that they believe getting help is worth their time and money he then proceeded to tell us a story about a woman who believed that ashton kutcher was her baby's daddy and she wanted a psychiatric professional to verify her mental health so she could file for child support and reconnect with him as far as he could tell she had never met ashton kutcher or even seen him in person so like sometimes people are crazy but not usually at it the point he was trying to make is that there's always a deep reason it's never just my husband lost a frying pan it's a constant pattern of carelessness or a lack of taking responsibility on the husband's part it's never just we couldn't decide on what type of chicken to get for our farm it's the inability to come to an agreement on any decisions minor or major these little things are a symptom of the bigger problem in the case of the woman at the end the bigger problem was schizophrenia i'm a clinical therapist and had a client bring in their spouse for a session they both have sporadically treated bipolar disorder i can only assume what a wild ride their kids are on vaccinate their child dad say go mom says no he insists jar jar is a sith lord and she just doesn't care i have never wanted a story to be true as much as i want to believe this [Music] stupid selfish answer coming from a child who grew up with this my mother scheduled an intervention she and my sister and i met with a counselor and talked about all the things my dad did wrong i would comment things that basically said i don't think that's the problem and would be constantly shut down we had the intervention and my dad got sober for a while turns out my mother is just an absolutely miserable child of a woman when i lived with her i saw glimpses of it she broke a plate once and when i asked why she said because i felt like it then when i started crying and picking up the pieces she just drunkenly stumbled past me and went to bed i think i was 12. she was 36 when i was born when we went to pick my dad up from rehab there was a group thing where they went around the room everyone would say something about their partner that they were there to pick up that they loved my mother said she couldn't think of anything my mother said she couldn't think of anything my dad told me later in life that that was the moment he knew it was over turns out they only got married in the first place because my mother's parents didn't want them living together before marriage scotch irish catholics go figure after years of dealing with a childish emotionally stunted generally shitty partner he stopped trying then she played the victim same as her mother and which she continues to do to this day she lies about being happy while being heavily medicated i reach out to her to meet my girlfriend of at the time seven years now eight bless her and she somehow manages to make our schedule around the wedding we're there for just making things difficult for her and cancels duck you i'm not even going to try it's always something i basically told her that's on her and if you want to be a part of my life you need to make an effort i went no contact a few months back and it's better for my mental health i'm sorry but i'm glad to hear you and your father are in a better place now [Music] you

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Id: K-TTVBu96Mo

Length: 16min 52sec (1012 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 21 2020