Mark Twain Was Wild!

[Music] [Music] yeah welcome to the you know what is this the 14th episode 1818 we can legally drink now I'm some states 18th episode of cuties with smoothies true blue humus actuals history hyenas that's right another episode I don't think you can legally drink at 18 in any state I think I'm mistaken in Europe you can you can be a pornstar 18 you in Europe you can do lots of things you can drink you can curse on television you're up kind of lives um we're like we'll get you eventually you don't mean they're starting to curse on cable now yeah you know you mean yeah so we're getting there yeah yes cute what some and we have our mascot in today um trash monkey the hyena trash monkey the hyena TM th he can't stay yeah we know it's a he because he has there's no tsuita because no sue the peanuts so we know it's a man but yeah he's having a hard time standing charge monkey he must have got attacked by a lion he's nothing did you see that video that people tagged us in on Instagram with the lie with the hyenas biting the other ones face off and then ripping out its intestines no I'm leaving it to die oh yeah another hey you know yeah yeah I wonder what I wonder what that hi Hina said to the other one I was eating my breakfast and I vomited yeah all over everything what do you think he did to him that made him want to open up his intestines and eat him they said that the hyena also says something about the matriarch he must have learned about the me yeah yeah oh he must have said that you know he didn't like I don't know [ __ ] Black Panther or something you was working a little slow on that no we're [ __ ] tired I'm not no I'm not tired today fresh dough cause yeah you know you know I feel good is because we do have we got Barto churches back the whitewash the Grand Wizard yeah so much for coming thank you so much for coming back nobody ever knew you were ever here I'm going on because nobody because you don't but we know yeah so sits there and surfs porn in the background B churches back yeah oh you know what see here's the world we live in it I have to specify how normal my fart sound compared to yours but I got a clean ass though I have to say I just have to say publicly on on this now that I did like the movie Black Panther yeah and in no way was that a dig at anyone who supported or didn't support Black Panther I support Black Panthers just a movie that I picked that came to me because I thought it was a good movie and I I do like Black Panther aka I'm not racist so just watch you have to do that now I have to do absolutely how it's you can get mad about it however which way you want like people like you know lose their minds you know in the all trying like why do it's the world we live in yes what you have to do just like in the 15th you know hundreds you had to say if you were living at the time of king henry i had to say i live i am now part of the Church of England I'll cut your [ __ ] head off yeah that's what it is you're not physically getting your head cut off but if you don't adhere to what you know the extreme left wants then you will get you'll get dismembered publicly on social media and you don't want that so they will they'll decapitate you in effigy but not for real but it's for real yes digitally they'll [ __ ] crush you and it doesn't matter it's like it's like being branded it's like being branded a pedophile if I accuse you of touching kids even though if you've never touched a kid the accusation is enough yeah it's like stealing jokes like the accusation is enough yeah so you know I just want to say publicly I enjoy Black Panther and that's how you stay safe I also have a Puerto Rican daughter and I'm more [ __ ] culturally diverse growing up in New York than most of the [ __ ] diverse people that live in this country just so you know so do you think we should just give in to the mage the social justice were a matriarch absolutely is there hi heinous I want to be you put up a character named Germaine the other day which I thought was great because literally it's me that's you right I don't care most people on your comments we're like this speaks to me the most because it's like yeah it's just the people are so where I'm SJW down I got no more sjw juice you got I got no more cuz yeah it's like I just want to [ __ ] raise my kid and I just want to speak to you young and I just want to keep growing out my hips oh just yawn to be out yeah that's the first time you ever called me yah I just want to [ __ ] drop my hips out yawn so you can cultivate my hip fat to make the clique that you've always dreamt up I told you that where did the yawn come from yeah hang out with you yawn you look like a yawn today you know look Johnny yeah yeah no gel I got no job flopping open your eyes right now you look full-blown Chinese no job no job a little subconscious you going through some stuff no I just um I got a big pimp on my head from the hairspray been using I thought yeah because I've been trying to get the hairspray to hold the front of the hair yeah I got to spray down sometimes a hair spray hits the top there and I got a pimp runner here it's a pimple that hurts so don't you get scalped I get scalped up yeah it's just you know I'm disadvantaging the fact that I can't gel up cuz my hair looks too thin when I do when I use product yeah so I gotta use hairspray I just gotta find one that's made of natural products that won't give me pen pause oh cause guess what I did this weekend why'd you don't watch the the three-hour movie Braveheart twice in a row yeah [ __ ] my hotel and cut Nautica yeah did you go there a part back to back yo did you import an opener cuz you couldn't handle it there's some kid who you [ __ ] oh yeah that's that's Chris Carpenter shoutout Chris Carpenter he he's the Booker of a laughs Boston he lives in Boston he just want to come down and say hello I think I did great kid yeah that's good kid yeah so he just came down to hang came down hang car that made you feel happy I'm it was only for a few hours cuz I'm gonna tell you sir now listen by the way also Zak Isis here on the ones and twos as always [ __ ] detonating hits yeah what I want to say and now this I had an experience that happened to me and I don't but I you know I believe in ghosts you know I believe in ghosts and some of its just like to joke but some of its like dead legit this kind of like spiritual guidance and stuff I don't agree I don't believe in but let me tell you the story and you like tell me like what's up okay so I was driving back home because I left my shows in Connecticut immediately Saturday night little I got paid the guy I I asked to get my check while the feature was onstage and the guy was like yeah but there still could be people coming in you know so I can't get you like you may be close to a bonus subs like just mail me the bonus which they'll never mail me now cuz I wasn't there to see it so they'd be like go you're gonna you got you're gonna light up yeah I'm guess we should just like try to get gas for the podcast [ __ ] gas digital baby so so you were leaving right so I left literally this I put the mic I swear to God I put that mic the guy give me my check already so I was like I don't care if I make another dollar here or not just give me the check whatever I was supposed to get whatever the [ __ ] bare minimum was just give me the check and I put it in my pocket went on stage did 45 on the dot what IRA had my [ __ ] packed and I gave you know them a high-five you know didn't wait for any fans I just got in my car and [ __ ] left so you bags were packed bags are packed I actually sprinted I actually like a light jaw while I was a light jog but I ran to my car to get home you know yeah I hated I mean cuz I mean a Hartford Connecticut is nice but it's like you know cut I mean cuz my goods yes I'm sitting there in the Courtyard Marriott I'm you know I mean I got my [ __ ] I can't tell you how many times I've you know I just put my head in the toilet was like I'm just gonna go yeah you know I mean it's bad out there gets bad not bad bad but like bad and by the way is it touch Bret's it's touched Brits its hashtag ill so I I'm gonna tell you guys I'm gonna tell you guys some of the things I learned at Hartford I learned some [ __ ] wild [ __ ] about Mark Twain yeah I'm so I want to say that but first let me just tell you what had happened I was like hmm I don't know I don't know it kind of makes me believe like is there something out there is there not an a.m. so I'm driving right come from Hartford it's about a two hours two and a half hour drive but it was like a limited drive home every night huh huh I would expect you maybe drive home every night I actually wasn't even thinking about it took me five hours to get there Thursday five and a half or five and a half hour sorry into it and then fraught and then I would have drove home Friday night if that kid Chris wasn't coming Saturday I was totally prepared to drive home yeah so I'm driving I'm like an hour away from home and I'm genuinely falling asleep like fought like I'm talking about like the chemicals in my brain aren't my eyes our closing like legit falling asleep where it was so powerful that I was like because of my allergies and stuff and I was like maybe I'm getting sick but like I was like I'm gonna have to pull over on the side of the road or something cuz I can't but I was like you know what [ __ ] it I just want to get home I need to see the lights of New York City and they don't get packed up so I'm driving and I don't know if it was an animal I don't know if it was uh you know a BOS something hit my driver's side window hard it didn't shatter it it didn't it didn't it didn't break a glass but it sounded like I'm telling you like it reverberate it through my car it hit my window hard like it was like a like that just a bang on my window till I looked and I went from you know literally like my eyes were closing genuinely to popped up to 100% [ __ ] both hands on the wheel like as if I just you know snorted like 20 adderall like the adrenaline went through the roof tee ta Tee tee Arthur so went through the roof so that happened and I was like holy [ __ ] 10 seconds later Ted um maybe less ten seconds later a car was in front of me and the hood of the car popped up popped up on the guy's car and the guy skid across all three lanes like you know because he had nothing in front of it you know he couldn't see it was raining skid through all three lanes on the middle of the span of the Triborough bridge and hit the side of hit my Sonia Triborough bridge on the truck you're in the city at this point yeah well yeah I was like yeah I was like I mean I'm in the Bronx yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah New York so hits the hits the decide you know I was in the right lane and I was able to swerve out at like 70 miles an hour swerve out of the way and not get killed because of that what happened 10 seconds before with that rock if I if I'm telling if that would have happened to me honey that was a rock or whatever something would have you killed an animal right so a little animal had to die so Chris Edie instead of pulling off the [ __ ] Road and doing the getting a nice coughed up you know no no what I'm saying you're had to [ __ ] kill an animal for you get waking up no but what I'm saying is if I didn't if I didn't get like sprung up I know I get it yeah you killed an animal probably yeah it's probably a possum or something but you don't say better ghosts trying to jump up look you don't think that's a little you don't think that's a little [ __ ] wild you were to gets a little it's a little crazy if you think it's just a coinkidink wow I don't think it's a clingy tank causing seconds later yeah a [ __ ] car why are you pretending like you don't know that you're being protected by the sim ease yeah we've already established an exact know that you got the pseudo in it but the antenna for the simulator is your tit yeah that communicates to all the simulator creations down here who are monitoring the game so of course you're not gonna knock you out cuz right well something happened to give your big head that's where the [ __ ] the Wi-Fi comes through here's and here's and I'm start slowly starting to figure it out as time goes on I'm slowly starting to figure it out god I'm a [ __ ] my pants I pushed so my grandpa right now guys are [ __ ] this guy humor right now we're doing guy humor people love it though how funny is fart stuff it's like people people try to act like they don't laugh I don't you could be like the most [ __ ] you know comedy you know aficionado fan like the psalm the air of comedy you're still gonna laugh privately at a fart joke don't [ __ ] act like you're not as comedians we're always chasing the fart farts the funniest thing in the plants what made George Carlin one of the best comedians of all time he could tell you in a joke like make like the AIDS crisis somehow funny and then a second later do fart joke why are farts so funny like inherently inherently funny because it's just this it's just like sounds coming out of your butt it's it's about the but the bucks funny because burps aren't as funny as far as uh but it's the same sound in the same action and they smell the same it's just it's just they don't slow it same no but when you get close enough you ever get a [ __ ] part that's most just like a hot dog yeah those are pay that was a bad babe a baby so it's the but I I believe it's got all everything to do with the but I thought the the human butt is the funniest thing about any animal in history besides a pseudo penis yeah I posted a pic of your BA at York on us on the Instagram okay yeah it's by the way follow us on our Instagram page go we're rich boy yeah I pay Ridge Boys we're lighting up Bay Ridge bucks and gettin high we're getting killed I posted that picture of us at the Nets game and somebody said photoshopped no wasn't no wasn't it we were there we weren't there [ __ ] nobody else was that place was empty empty empty my grandpa so I'm glad your life no I got into a huge car accent when I was 18 huge huge like I was being an 18 year old neck line like the firefighters like all we fully expected to show up and it was gonna be a dead body inside but I was able cuz can I just say this before we go there yeah next time you're feeling really that tired on the road and it's raining out I think you got to pull over my guts but I was so close to home I just was like let me just get there call fault why don't you call I did I had yet died yeah you didn't put on Whitney Houston pep you out cause I had that on all [ __ ] night you did huh wet day yeah so when I was 18 when I had that car accident you know there were I thought I was gonna [ __ ] die too like the car like flipped over and everything but I said my grandpa who had died like two years before that he had like a very distinct smell and I smelled him like I smelt that my car smelled like my grandpa was like very distinct was like oh it smells like my grams and my grandpa had huge ankles like his ankles look like tumors so I'm wondering I'm wondering if like all these mr. imperfections that I have I wouldn't if grant my grandpa was like my simulator like like if he was like the ultimate simulated bot you know what I mean and if he's the one that's keeping me alive I wonder I wonder if it's him yeah why did it but I always wonder if there's all these mysterious forces looking out for us why do they care if we stay alive for what what the [ __ ] I don't know I wouldn't cut me because we're entertaining maybe they like how cuz we're entertaining you know what it is cuz cuz I can't think of any other reasonable reason why they would look out for us like hey why am I gonna be look out looking out for this specific dude yeah this 18 year old you were 18 you were probably doing a lot of bad things all right yeah I mean how many times you jerk off in that hotel room this week I swear to God I had well I got there Thursday night did the show and then just went to bed Friday was that for Saturday I was out five not five times so nine times in 48 hours cuz yeah less a little bit of a prob no yeah but it's because just because what was coming out the it was like air coming out of bi v cuz I got a lot of juice you see my balls they said well you still have milk coming out yeah cause I got a [ __ ] yard to drink an oat milk you got a drink oat milk yeah yeah so you still had glue I saw glue ya know cuz I think I was watching a little documentary what were you jerking off to [ __ ] pornhub okay yeah that's what I'm gonna be Queen Elizabeth now point up no court no I was drunk enough porn up and then oh but I can also jerk off to like ESPN like when sports centers are just jerk off yeah like if its background me like I just choked up to my own thoughts yeah yeah I don't need to I don't need to be like you're hyper sexual cuz yeah but it's going down it's going down you're a hyper sexual kid I'm a hyper sexual cat yeah you get excited you get butterflies right you feel the excitement and the butterflies won't worry about the bang out well yeah you know you about to treat some girls face like a construction boom yeah yeah yeah when it's a construction site yeah yeah yeah danger men working yeah what do you date butterflies in the stomach artifice yeah but y'all cause to be honest with you it's kind of like like I haven't banged out I'm a you know in a law in like a month or something it's just because I just don't it's like the risk gets too much and I just the way I feel after it is just like yeah it's just kind of like I think I'm hitting that point of maturity where it's like not worth it yeah it's just not worth it and it's like I'm just okay jerking off you know welcome to club it's kind of brutal it's kind of brute are you at that bar no where it's like you see a beauty there yet no yeah I got seven wives to please needs to keep those balls full he's drinking oat milk yeah he's trick it yeah yeah no Bakken crude oh it's just [ __ ] brutal where it's like these girls like they're beautiful but it's like I just don't I don't want to go on a date I don't I just don't care anything I have the energy I don't need the energy it's like I would much like five years ago if you guys were like you know you could tell me joins you could be like it were sitting in the dugout at Yankee Stadium if I had posts lined up I would die I can't go I gotta get push yeah I like one of my boys is flying to Florida to bang a girl yeah exactly yeah and I can't think of a worse thing to do it's like what you're gonna get on a plane to five free flight house ears clogged up and [ __ ] for two why because you got free flight now cuz you know JetBlue yeah and the post is farm you know yeah yeah you don't be he's not put them on a shish kabob like you are one after the other but I'm not anymore you rack up you ever see them making the gyro meat making that thing putting like little thin slivers a chicken yeah that's how Chrissy's these puss comes in just [ __ ] sliver after sliver cuz but I know that that's not gonna be like that forever but I also feel varying are you gonna blow out bad oh and your fifty year old man Wow but Wow but I also feel like out with that neck tattoo too and your heads gonna go for you're gonna be a little hunchback yeah yeah don't be funny kid though yeah I'll probably get more tats yeah but you're gonna blow out your metabolism scald your cuz I thought of a new tap tell me what you guys think well I was thinking about getting I was thinking about you know my daughter was born May 19 2015 I was I was gonna Google online what the constellation in the sky was that night and get that tattooed right on my chest yeah do that yeah the Big Dipper yeah [ __ ] I think that's a good idea why not Pete Davidson just got Ariana Grande touch he's got he's got four girlfriends all their tattoos on his [ __ ] body yeah that kid is [ __ ] wild cuz he's you know well but you're the girl but people people it's like it you know they live these lives where it's like I don't know why people do what they do cuz he doesn't even need a [ __ ] publicist no every girl he dates he gets a lot of publicity so it's true though that we run an energy I was [ __ ] at it's just this week and I added a line to a joke I said hey I would say I just want to share cuz I thought it was really funny I was like if my girl I'm at that age my girl if my [ __ ] fiance cheats on me I'm like look let's work it through I was like just [ __ ] you're in love with the guy have him move in with us I'll raise his kids yeah I'm not [ __ ] breaking up or going through that again yes tribe are toasting [ __ ] over 40 cuz he was these awesome a [ __ ] rich cuz oh it's like look it's like look if Irish it's like a relationship it's like I'm not gonna like constantly cheat and get like another wife but like as adults like if I you know if I'm [ __ ] on you know five years so now if I'm on the road for two weeks and I want to just you know bang somebody out that's fine and if she wanted to do it just one off it's like we're human beings whatever it's like is it worth [ __ ] you know being single to try to go through these rolodex of guys or girls and and you know the problems with the DM z-- I mean in 2018 it's like you know you're banging someone and then you stop banging them and like oh yeah you know you assaulted me it's like come on yeah you know it's you're only 33 now I'm gonna be 34 but I'm a little young for this right that's a little young but maybe cuz having a kid I'm just yeah maybe a little bit also like stupid decisions I made it wisen up yeah you get wise dive for houses now you know yeah I'm gonna buy another one yeah yeah yeah you like a kid who just got an MBA contract yeah yeah but not but the only difference is I don't have millions of dollars yeah like the first the first six months of one we really started hanging out tough was just basically me telling you like and I'm not even [ __ ] you know I'm just a conservative regular guy right you know I'm just normal with mine I'm not like a genius with money I'm just [ __ ] normal with it yeah was it first six months was me going like yeah and I shouldn't do that not that like yeah no I shouldn't [ __ ] oh my it's not normal to buy an elephant that's crazy oh I was gonna say elephant member I bought I bought $700 Jordans I had elephant print on yeah I'm like a boy but this shirts 300 Oz but it's got a giraffe with tattoos on it's nice I'm gonna move down I won't move in this building cuz I want to work out with Sergio in the gym yeah all right well now now now I got somebody taking over that actually today is it Phil Hanley yeah who also has a podcast on rod cast calm and he's got a roof over his head and he's got a roof over Sedna for the couple months yeah at least for a few mods they're in sync Justin Timberlake in Javas Georgia tone Chris Kirkpatrick Lance Bass you busy you you love horrible music I like my favorite bands honestly I love NSYNC I like Backstreet Boys I like I like a little bit of 98 degrees Whitney Houston obviously Ace of Base I can listen to them all day SWV sisters with voices Brandi Moishe and you're not being funny I'm not being funny this is dead serious I mean this is what my Missy Elliott this is what my iTunes like of Governor's Ball was was was this week or last week when you guys say the podcast I didn't know one band besides Eminem I knew nobody on that thing and they were like how do you not know the [ __ ] yeah yeah yes I'm like I just don't know they are yeah yeah yeah you you got bad musical tastes definitely a true-blue psychopath yeah I got bad musical tastes and I was watching the crown on Netflix over the NBA Finals so yeah didn't watch him be fun I mean I watched a little bit of it on my cuz it's just been the Warriors and the Cavs I don't care anymore yeah it's you know what's gonna happen the Warriors are gonna if I if I was Adam silver honestly I would just I would try to implement some kind of rule that you can't you can't make super teams it's not good for your league you can't but you can't I can't fault the Warriors Organization for putting together such a great team I mean none of those picks were or lottery picks no they built that team like the Yankees and they got one free agent right so it's basically the same thing but here's the thing here's because I was thinking about it like is it hypocritical of me to like be mad at the Warriors or just find the game annoying now and boring because I'm big Yankees fan but I remember in 2000 when he was the Yankees Mets it was Yankees Mets which is like the subway it was like a New York thing I was like I don't I didn't care about it like the Yankee I'm just sick and tired of seeing the Yankees even though I'm a huge Yankee fan Wow and then they got there the next year it's like I don't either I just I just don't like doesn't even make sense things need to change that's sick of seeing the Yankees now yeah you need to be I'm not one of those win yeah because they're there I want them to win but I just I mean I know you love it cuz I'm a Yankee fan I would never say the words would never come out of my mouth I'm sick of seeing the Yankees especially the World Series you need to be [ __ ] put down you need to be [ __ ] put down isn't all the Warriors Cavs um finals just one big blur you can't tell one from the other I know the same bullsh I'll answer your question when Cavs can't get picked came back three one that was the only one that was dull I'll ask you I'll answer your question with a question of my own yeah is it justice is it justice if I say cuz you want a sale and you go hey we're going to take the ferry I go no we're not taking the ferry today I got us a nice little sailboat me and yo we're gonna sail around the bay of New York City and think about when the revolution every trips we're watching the British troops come in okay and you're like I'm game boom yeah so we go out there I bring a couple beers to throw you off make you think we're sitting out there right and then [ __ ] talented mr. Ripley style I take whatever freaking anchor I got there and bash you over the head yeah repeatedly watch you blow out well you go why cousin and I kick you over and [ __ ] watch a beluga whale eat your body cuz cuz sharks aren't big enough to eat your bak have to be a well would that be justice for you saying you're sick of seeing the Yankees in the [ __ ] World Series that would be justice cuz as long as cuz I'm a true patriot and we're on you know our revolution and war til you play Yankee Doodle Dandy cuz that has I was down cuz you can't be a Yankee fan and say you're sick of seeing a yes I'm not sick is in the [ __ ] world Sarah wasn't and it wasn't 2000 or 2001 where I was like it's just I mean III one thousand one was one of the greatest sporting events I know history I know yeah again is the most painful thing I know you were sick and that didn't excite you yes behind bars is where you need to be yeah yeah you're not supposed to be out into society I don't know what if I don't know what [ __ ] excites me anymore yeah that's just that's a psychopathic try sat down for a [ __ ] true-blue psychopath my mom my mom was like horrified to hear she's like she was like you need to go on medication i I was I was up for this this pilot on Amazon and didn't get picked up so my mom was asking me about it she was like how was Howard you know you can hear anything about that pilot way is that the one you were in I was in yeah yeah yeah didn't get picked up but you got that peg child but I got that pan you also figured out that you look good in uh red wing shows yeah they bought a pair you were getting a revered shoe you were all sneakers and then you got those red were character was wearing those red wigs hell yeah your [ __ ] Wow well so so I got um so she's like she's like she was like ah don't worry about it honey you know when one door closes another opens and I was like mom stop it's not true I was like that's not a true saying I was like life it's just hard sometimes and doesn't go your way I was like the same thing with Catholicism it's all [ __ ] I'm like just stop doing I know I was like mom kill I was like I was like we're both adults now I was like when you call me can you just not can you just think about what you want to say a and she was like what are you talking what are you doing I know I just lost my mind how old your mom she's 60 you so you think a 60 year old woman's gonna be like you know what yeah yeah I'd be thinking about it all this I'm from Queens yeah I'll just do ya know she said you know good I was wrong I know I can ruin a day I mean let I was wrong I know completely wrong maybe it's depression maybe but maybe the point is when I'm bringing up is maybe that's why I like this the finals I'm just like yeah maybe I'm [ __ ] deeply depressed cousin you don't want to help me ah that cuz I don't think you depress it all you're not a depressive personality you're an anxious personality there's two types of personalities they fall either you ever notice people either sway one way or they sway the other way okay they either sway towards anxiousness or they sway towards depression it's really what it is you're on a scale it's just like the sexuality scale either you're like this guy or you look [ __ ] I need to get some pause over there and everyone and then me and you were [ __ ] closer to the nest cause like that but you swayed closer to the anxious not the depressed because you know it was interesting when I was in Connecticut cuz I was you know walking around in [ __ ] salt it was like a hundred degrees out in Connecticut and I hate the heat I [ __ ] hate it I gotta go to Vegas this week it's 105 I [ __ ] hey I'm thinking of our thinking of ways to cancel but there you're gonna have friends which you know I mean Irish man good can go Katie's good energy he's gonna want to sit in the base with a drink beer that's what he does today yeah daddy fly balls but balls yeah so I went and visited a Mark Twain's house cuz I need to be indoors because I'm gonna tell you guys a fact about Mark Twain right now it's gonna blow your forward Oh Mark Twain okay [ __ ] first of all as Yanis as you've said the first comic the first like he was like the first national comic he was pretty much he toured gave speeches and wrote punchlines well yeah so he was like the first standing touring comedian he was he was they called him a humorous but like they he would pack theaters out for his speeches but they were off they were funny yeah they're all funny yeah and we would have dinner parties and people were like we just want to hear your jokes yeah he was born in 1835 okay Halley's Comet at least comment like you know the the comment that comes through the Earth's it's trapped unlike the Earth's gravity but it comes around it's trapped in the gravity the universe comes around every 74 to 76 years so the day he was born nice the day he was born Halley's comet Halley's Comet came in to the atmosphere like it was seen it was that day so throughout his life he's was like I feel I feel like I'm one with Halley's Comet like I'm just Haley's car it will all about Halley's Comet for him he loved he's like whatever and then when he was 75 or 74 he said I have a good feeling a very strong feeling I'm gonna die the next time Halley comets Halley's Comet appears appears in the atmosphere said I'm gonna die said because I feel like I was dropped off by Halley's Comet and I'll be picked up by Halley's Comet we're one in the same and lo and behold that [ __ ] died the very very day that Halley's Comet reappeared in the atmosphere is this something he said her something attributed to him I don't I don't by Mark Mark Twain saying that what do you mean because he's basically saying the same thing that that Colton Los Angeles said he said yeah cool remember that Colton Los Angeles will Mark Twain Halley's Comet yup he said it he said I expect to die I came into this world with Halley's Comet you would he said he'd actually be disappointed it would be the greatest disappointment of his life if he didn't go out with Halley's Comet and then did he do yeah he died on the on that on the day Halley's Comet reappeared in the atmosphere Wow it's not food right [ __ ] wall yeah Halley's Comet is just like a [ __ ] rock yeah flying to felt like a connection to it but it's not the wild that is killed yeah that's care that is cute that's wild and and died one day after it appeared when he guessed it would the year that it showed up the day after he died he died Samuel Clemens Samuel Clemens real name white suit like the synonymous white suit tail end of his life most of his life he didn't have that white suit really yeah he didn't he just what was he wearing he was just wearing like he was a sandals never sandal who's a shoe guy he lived a lot he lived a life that was kind of like you are everybody in his family you know his wife died his kids died only one kid outlived them he watched he watched a lot of heartbreak and most of the [ __ ] that he wrote most most of Mark Twain's life majority of his life I think 70 years like or like yeah well not counting time he was a little kid he was broke here no he lived off his wife's money that big man should sat he had it was all his wife's money and he only started to make money at the end of his life when his when that the author the publisher was like you got to go on tour to sell these books and then he started making those speeches ah so you know really really is like a modern-day comic yeah yeah no money you know luckily he had he had a wealthy wife his books were like girl code you didn't get paid from MTV but you cashed in on this road and he lives right next door to Harriet Beecher Stowe yeah that's that's wild that's what so Harry Beecher Stowe is living there and she was at that time the most famous American and then Uncle Tom's Cabin she wrote exactly and then Twain II boy came in and Twain was gaining steam as America's most famous American did they hook up no they they barely hung out because they both they both felt like there were the most famous Americans and they kind of didn't like each other they were jealous she was but she all he also she was only alive for five years when Mark she was at the end of her life and Mark Twain was like kind of in the middle of his yeah so but his kids used to go his kids would go but they said that they really it wasn't like a love you would think like the two most famous and it would be they were saying it was like if like you know like LeBron James and Beyonce live like right across the street so they were really kind of jealous of each other a little bit yeah yeah it was interesting me I mean that's a shame they have just been better if they could have been nice neighbors and they said like Mark Twain like why they think he was so successful I'm like or why he attributes his success is like every a lot of other writers at the time and everybody was about work work work work you got to sit down with your pen on the paper or your fingers on the typewriter for 10 hours a day and just write Hammer stuff out hammer stuff out he would never do that he would sit down and write for a minute or two if he felt like it and then if he wants to play billiards all day and drink and smoke sticks that's what he would do yeah have his boys come he would only write when inspired and even if it went a year with him writing nothing he didn't care yeah and when he was inspired he would write his work Huckleberry Finn Tom Sawyer I actually saw the heroes and kid stuff exactly the exact place where he wrote Huckleberry Finn you did yeah that's where they stay say sat down he just he wrote he wrote it in like he wrote it in like a couple of months he just wrote it did you ever read Huckleberry Finn I did when I was a kid but I forgot I did buy a book though with all Mark to like Mark Twain like little quote quotes and quips you want to know my favorite Mark Twain quote is yes this is probably gonna be the one that I asked you about now if God wanted us to speak more than we were supposed to listen he would have given us two mouths instead of two ears yeah he also had like a sense of humor big time sent to you yeah we're not responding to this don't get discouraged because those are good but we just want to keep him in the flow you know that's good I like when those come in yeah yeah twenty boy he was it was [ __ ] kind of uh it was dope like he wrote he was like he would do like he kind of like they're saying was like the first like prank writer like he would write things like he got hired to be a writer for some local newspaper and he was like he wrote like something like five hundred men dead and explosion bla bla bla bla bla and then like at the end it was like that never happened you know like they would get fired for [ __ ] like that Mark Twain wasn't his real name because yeah back then writing the books that he wrote with like the black character Jim the slave and all that and just uh was revolutionary his he was against slavery and things like that and you can tell in his book you know with the slavery against religion - yeah and just having those morals in his book was so revolutionary at the time and unpopular in a lot of ways that he wrote under a pseudonym makes things easier yeah and poses Mark Twain guy doesn't exist people would come to his his house parties and ask the Haake it was Mark Twain here and they would like people like his family would laugh about you know Mark Twain doesn't exist yeah his name is Samuel Clemens and people would come take the train from California like an old two-week journey to meet Mark Twain that Mark Twain memorabilia all that and say nobody knew that it was his name was Samuel Clemens except like then that the people close to him cuz he was born in Florida yeah yeah that's [ __ ] why it was Missouri he was born in Missouri you're right yeah cuz Florida Missouri we were both Missouri I didn't even know there was y'all how come there's another stay inside of another state how far to Missouri [ __ ] a rich cause Oh cause that's sometimes somebody from baybridge might say hey reg yo he's from Florida Missouri gotta [ __ ] the Florida get inside of Missouri yours too states and wine that's [ __ ] walk out of here yeah he's he's uh but he's his he's dead in a cemetery in New York yeah I think he was Elmira New York something like that good memory yeah yeah I really enjoyed the Mark Twain House the kid the kid who was given the tour had [ __ ] John McCain arms he couldn't lift his arms above his shoulder and I was like what the hell happened he was like he told me that he was ripped delts the night before this when he said he's like I was blowing out shoulders and he couldn't lift up his arms yeah he was raised in Hannibal Missouri yeah yeah Hannibal Buress and he would um he would like play with his boy he had no aspirations to be a writer he would just play with his friends you know he was like doing like something he was a riverboat pilot for a little while yeah yeah yeah and he's just like you know what then he just started somebody gave him a job and he started to write and then he took that pseudonym Mark Twain because he was like working on a boat and Mark Twain means it's like some boating term it means like when you take on Oh Mark Twain means I think when you're in 12 feet of water and that and that's like a sign they would say oh we're Mark Twain now and that means like smooth sailing once you're in 12 feet so that's what he took Mark Twain meant like smooth sailing yeah he was leave failed in a lot of businesses to fail he he spent the reason why he was broke he put all his money in in whatever was rivaling the typewriter at that time which just got crushed I forgot what it was called but he put almost all his money in that but it was the typewriter that would like take off so he just used his wife's inheritance that's all it was blow it out that sounded like a fart and a queef I think you gotta push did you go up oh stop cuz is that why you're tired you're tired from the surgery he's been putting it to the front to the front half it's hard to clean for now yeah I'm not gonna lie to you you know what I have for breakfast today why oreo cheesecake whoa why from where I had it left over in my um from from yesterday where'd you order from I went wild yesterday with food when I went to blows Wild Wings up in uh levity levity live now I come back thank you for kids a couple [ __ ] hi history I he an offense came out Oh yuck yuck yuck ah thank you for coming out um yeah I got up there early I had Buffalo Wild Wings by yourself yeah but my sign of depression with uh with onion rings Wow I had and then at the club I had meat lovers Pizza whoa and then afterwards we went watch the game me and Angelo and his son we went watch the game and we all blah blah well he was I mean I've never seen anyone drink as much alcohol zones Angelo is not gonna be with us for that much longer go out last and then uh yeah we had like 15 different appetizers because it was happy hour so I mixed a lot of different [ __ ] yeah that's the brew that's going I've been on the toilet all morning cos those solid shit's not let's go let's call you boy jihad now that yeah you know it's just it's just one of those days I was happy I didn't have anything to do in the morning so I can stay close to a toilet yeah because you know it's like it's ray I had to go like five six rounds with ya really feel good don't know right now I feel good it's a little I feel a little you know yeah like you know when you do war with diarrhea you know it takes it out of you a little bit cuz you think maybe you're sad cuz your dog eats children yeah my daughter's yeah yeah over the over the weekend I'm last weekend Jonas's dog attacked my child and I'm gonna yeah she put her hand out and she took it that was depressing yeah I could tell you upset about that cuz that's why I brought it off I wanna really get to the bottom oh yeah you're right under you gonna do now let me ask you a question oh we're off a building yeah I'm saying if it's gonna if it's gonna attack kids because you want me to [ __ ] you want me to dismember and throw it off the top of the Empire State yeah we'll figure it out cuz you know what's the good news though if you know worse comes to worse and you got to give the dog away that opens up the couch I could sleep over again yeah you know it's hopefully something that we can train out of it cuz it's like right you're saying yeah right because I have to and I actually have a dog that's scared of children and I have children in my house like all the time they're just unfamiliar with the sound and the size of them and everything like I've heard that they see them as puppies yeah so some dogs are good with puppies too but you can you can definitely train that out of them yeah yeah we got to do that it's [ __ ] depressing though it's brutal cuz you're like yeah you know that that's the only way I would get rid of a dog if I if that cuz you can't have that you can't have a dog because one of my boys texted me asking me asking honest if he tried to buy snooze today they put out a new tax they're $25 each now snooze snooze he's my boy Otis worm is saying they just put a new tax on him in there 25 each I just bought this downstairs for 8 bucks he say no [ __ ] they put a tax 25 bucks per snooze that's what he's saying time to quit time to quit I'm the [ __ ] I gotta quit anyway I mean I'm swallowing this [ __ ] tobacco jizz cars can't be good for me cuz cause i watch Braveheart i watch six hours of brain fart I [ __ ] memorise well I learned about you this weekend I learned how to do a part off the top of my head do it huh this I'm not wow I'm not reading this yeah this is from true it's how you know you'll watch it will be too much I'm in saying it all [ __ ] weekend yeah run and you'll live fight and you may die but when you're dying in your beds many many years from now would you be lucky funny cuz I don't know if you got the chops cuz why I mean that's brutal yeah yeah fight put a little acting into it put a Larkin thing and you'll die run you may live put a lack you look like a kid who just got a lolly you look special needs a little run and you're live do it like you're in the scene run okay well I can't do with the scholarship ya watching your patient yeah do it [ __ ] jacked it you sound you selling special kid okay fight and you may die run and you'll live but dying in your beds you so many many years from now would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that to have one chance just one chance to look at your enemy in say you could take my life but you'll never take my freedom I wish I had a barf bag what do you [ __ ] brutes it's Megan yeah that was breathless yeah fight and you will live die and you will say fight and your lip fight I do would love that's how he says it he goes fight and you're left run no no fight and you'll die run you're my life she says no there you got a little Scottish there mm-hmm he hates Jews big fan of Mel Gibson yeah yeah so wolf had a good bid on her show about Mel Gibson yesterday she had a an app called uber where Mel Gibson is just in the back of your ruber yelling juice how's the showers good Michele Walsh ah I honestly I'll watch the episodes great yeah yeah [ __ ] I haven't checked it out yet me check it out I love that everyone start to come with blowing right past me yeah that's just one of those things that happens in comedy yeah I got nothing besides the honest and the high Heena yeah I mean it's not a big deal and look everything goes up and goes down he's talking uh you know this was probably the least I've drawn at levity still decent we have one show that was an oreo cheesecake the next morning for breakfast but then I Angelo was telling me he was opening like a weekend before for what's-his-name Trevor Noah no Trevor knows so sold ah sold out you kid handsome kid Trevor Noah no okay big dick do you think or no I would think no yeah I would think now definitely no sir cuz he's South African it was dark out I would think no no I think idea I don't think he has pace yeah but what's uh what's the guy I'm trying to think of Pablo Francisco Francisco yeah and he was a guy was empty like that for him to remember he [ __ ] that kid made like six million dollars one year geez when was that well recently it was empty yeah last time you opened for him yeah so it goes up it goes down yeah I know hey it goes up it goes down but that's why like you know like a guy like a dove Davidoff who's like you know who invest properly that's why we make a little box you invest money you don't gotta [ __ ] worry about the financial always want to see the TIC you always wanna see the house fall but you know basically if you want to [ __ ] you know gotta buy properties yeah you gotta invest that's why I got I got a spot we've all got spots and you gotta save you money gotta save the money you guys save your money yeah yeah can't be on the road cuz I don't know I'll probably get off the road sixties I'll be done yeah I'm not gonna be on the road [ __ ] I'm not gonna be doing that seventies eighties doing comedy because if Bay Ridge Boys and history Aeneas when it takes off and we're selling out wall to wall cuz the heinous are starting to come out of their packs out of the Serengeti it's wrong to kind of like civilize themselves and come and show off for shows we're gonna be good to go bred brothers spread brothers oh and by the way Zach thank you so much found on a picture that we got up in our lab here of what looks like a baby hyena with a full-grown lions head in its mouth a detached decapitated line I've seen this pic before I've seen this pic before I start off to this yeah yeah I I want the elephant foot rivals this yeah well I watched a great nature video okay today that I highly recommend what's gone you google it it's a puma trying to get a sloth in a tree and is it quick can we pull it up right now in common to put it up yeah I mean it's [ __ ] wild I mean he fails so many times the Puma and then the Puma actually sharpens his own claws on on like a dead next to him he scrapes his claws and it helps him climb the tree and he finally grabs his [ __ ] sloth okay I mean I don't know why nature's made sloths this slow but then I did some research and sloths getting killed by predators is actually pretty rare so how though cuz it goes so high they go so high they're usually in the trees but when they come down they always get [ __ ] eaten what's not like an eagle or something get it um they can't get into the branches like that you know so it's like big up but yeah they get plucked up yeah plucked up plucked out locked up locked out we gotta go do we got it I know you've done it already with with Ted but do we gotta go for like a history or trip do we gotta go to a safari do we have to do that do have to do that okay that's something we're gonna have to because what if I want to run out and pet a lion I'm done that huh yeah yeah hey look I cuz you know if you you know if you really want to kill me all you got to do all you gotta do is [ __ ] smear something to tell her and throw a Mickey Mantle jersey on one of those lines I'll run right up the way did you see that pic I tagged you in a Mickey Mantle yeah but I didn't what was it he's just jacked that was forums right yeah but like how dope was that it's like throwing the baseball helmet is just a beautiful photo yeah yeah you know you don't have any [ __ ] artistic inclinations whatsoever you know whatever like you your pop you're like a pop guy yeah I'm pop you don't art you're not in the art you're not an art it's like you don't want to go to a museum you want to learn history where I listen to [ __ ] you want to listen to [ __ ] ASA base because I would go to the museum but you and I [ __ ] just to hang out with me though because I figured out what animal you were in a previous life you took this weekend till it [ __ ] hit me when we're a dog Oh dog that's right the Christ look I mean look I feel like we were all I feel like Indians how to write you know reincarnated probably and we're all animals in previous lives yeah your last life you were a dog dog 20 love dogs yeah that love dogs yeah dogs can't be alone dogs are pack animals then you'd be around people that you know you don't have been alone no I don't like being alone dude if you went to jail solitary confinement you wouldn't make it no no you can't make it but I mean I don't think you know yeah I don't want to go you're not good alone cause by the way I watched killer in the family a couple I couldn't I couldn't watch I one thing I watched our first episode couldn't do it I couldn't do any more most uncomfortable thing it's worth you watch every episode I worked watch the first two it is worth it to sit through that just to understand how [ __ ] crazy human beings are yeah killer in the family it's a dardo it's it's bizarre and the woman who does it is dope she's a forensic criminal psychologist [ __ ] cute yeah yeah no films right no fumes I maybe date a little yeah no I don't think no films yeah yeah I mean cuz the fact that this killer I forgot their last name was Austin he killed his wife and then took his kids home picked kids up from school like nothing happened gave him fish and chips put him talked them in they were like where's your mom they're like oh she's just late for work and then wait until they fell asleep and just killed his kids those kids - yeah just snapped yeah so basically it's like a four six-part documentary about people who kill their white wipe out killers they call yeah and they kill their own family yeah and we're going to watch though just because of the the personality traits that are in there cuz the woman is a profiler yeah so it's like there are clear as day signs yeah that this person could be that you know it's it's pretty well it's brute so I recommend you you watch it just in case you're in a relationship with somebody and they seem a little selfish self-centered socially awkward yeah and subcenter socially awkward narcissistic Narcis control and trolling carry it but it's like you know rose watch that documents like yeah I know guys like that like the insecurities and Men is [ __ ] wild yeah but when you see a real insecure dude it said yeah look I got fat left titties and I you know what I mean but like and I'm not gonna take my Jeffrey yeah but I don't care dude it's like yeah I get if a girl wants to leave me it's like yeah it sucks but like I'll just keep keep [ __ ] moving yeah but you got a cute face that's what if you didn't have a cute face you might be insecure imagine you were born with not a cute face to match that body yeah cuz yeah you know the universe is balanced like that that's love about the universe yeah you got a cute face yeah your feet do look like that you owed somebody money and they put those guys in a vise fan I do have a butt like a Kardashian yeah you did do you why you're gonna blow out bad yeah you gotta enjoy it now yeah yeah you may blow out your 40 clothes you know what I just had downstairs I had an oatmeal ball it's called he's staying healthy that's pretty good Yoji got this videos out he's got a cute up but he's a little long but let's see the beginning in the end yeah cuz when he swipes him it's fun when he actually swipes him at the end it's almost like he takes him a kick like come on [ __ ] over here he swipes him quick by the way guys before we start this video I want to just give a shout out to anyone listening who's not I'm a patreon member join our patreon page patreon.com/lenguin and you know a baker who can bake me and jana Sahin a cake with a pseudo penis it'd be greatly appreciated I'm email us at BRB patreon gmail.com right is that the right website correct that's the email right correct BRB dot patron at gmail.com yeah you know if you guys know a baker if you yourself are a baker arm we would love to have a hyena cake with a pseudo penis absolutely my birthday is August 26 and aw Yanis is August 25th correct so if you want to get then to us in time for our birthday that being nice little birthday surprise that would be a really nice thing you did who I'm really talking to is Raphael de Luca or Krista teacher superfans you guys find it and make it happen get that [ __ ] cake with the pseudo pink accusation Jenna K she said she was gonna cook it for Danny B you better come through he's gonna bake it remember birthday August 25th soggy August 25 august 26 we're probably gonna try to we may put together a live a high Hina show for that day we're working on it yeah yeah all right let's see the beginning of this watch this I loved it narrator - oh we got no volume look at dude yo [ __ ] using the computer Kumar to look up different forms of plutonium we got no volume but look it look it look at how slow they move yeah that's slow cuz I mean because if you're a Puma and you want to eat something like that that looks good yeah look at how wild look at how psychopathic Pumas look in their face I mean monsters you don't you know if to worry about like make-believe monsters the monsters are here on earth I mean look at that thing a stone-cold killer look at it cause the way all he wants to do is get up that tree and kill that [ __ ] did I read some kind of fact that it's either Pumas or cheetahs or Jaguars and maybe all of them can jump 10 feet with 50 pounds of meat Mayer Malik leopard looks Leopard I mean how nuts is that yeah the straw actually pound-for-pound leopards are the strongest cat but they're kind of little Tigers are actually the strongest [ __ ] cat ties why doesn't the sloths just go all the way - because look how fast he's moving cuz he's trying that's top China look at that thing look at how scary that thing looks at puma kind of look at that face look at that thing yo you took a moment to take me out I was further away I mean because quick as that as quick as day the third time he's going to leap at Luana okay he keeps trying like [ __ ] it gets this far and then kid okay time time has reached higher oh now it's stuck in the vagina of the tree yeah this this video was interesting because the whole time I'm rooting for the sloth yeah but like it's also kind of a story of like persevere I was gonna say persecuted because it's not like it gets to a point and it's like takes arrest it go has to go all the way to the bottom and try again yeah and like he really does persevere this is really like a story about like hey man keep trying well I mean it's funny nappy doesn't if he's gonna die sloths look I'm sorry they look a little like special cuz in their faces I got a friend one of them guys I grew up with his name is Sean he looks just like me and my boy sent pictures of he's sharpening his nails look at how smart this cat is he's sharpening his nails so he can hold on to the trees he does have a cute ass what's this LOC doing aerobics at the time cuz keep [ __ ] climbing yo maybe the sloth had a death wish I mean maybe he went home and his wife was getting pounded out by a [ __ ] Morano might be giving him another chance I mean this is so sad I mean it's lost a little special look at that face he's like dude Google Puma first sloth guys and you'll see what we're talking about him and look at him I mean it's just brute oh yeah we're gonna put this up on well they can find it no but we're gonna put it up put it up for you he's like yeah look look at this what happens his nails again cuz his nails are like [ __ ] stainless steel yeah look at those nails yeah yeah no those nails will cut your face wide open they'll cut your jugular right out right open I mean he's built to kill it's a puma nice sneakers too in the eighties yeah look he thinks he's gonna eat thinks he's alright I mean this I mean this sloths got to keep going this time round the other side figure it out that was the [ __ ] perseverance it's not this guy's tumbling down again yo but this Puma give up because guess what he's like Chrissy D and that sloth is a bowl in the Paulo cuz what about the poor burn he must have he has popper yeah we got poor % bad bad does it occur but did you see that here we go here we go [ __ ] look when he gets him it's almost like get over here mother like he's mad at him that he made him work like get the [ __ ] home and that's it now this is the brutal part watch he'll see you red slob called on the sloths holds on with all strength and he just he's just hanging on the flash hang on to the tree by his fangs with God's beautiful world on his flesh and I watched a shot of them still washed shot at the slots face one last glimpse at this lost face look this is the face of a sloth that's [ __ ] here we go he's lasted long enough so now what he just breaks this mat Pullman's just had enough like come here I mean what're you gonna do you're gonna hold on I mean you gotta give credit to life try I mean that sloth was so done but it was still trying to hold on and yeah then he just eats him on the ground I mean that's what it is yeah unfortunately that's what it is that's life though right that's why it's like when one door opens another clip that's [ __ ] did you feel anything when you watch it you feel bad for the sloth a little bit actually real are you pretending like you [ __ ] psychopath only cuz it looks like my friend Shawn oh yeah yeah I felt bad for the sloth but I mean I don't know I mean it's just animals but are what they are its nature it is what it is I mean look at this picture we got up there that's a hyena with a female lionesses head in its mouth yeah fully decapitated look this is why Zach got this picture up yeah cuz this hyena is obviously Muslim fully to kappa this is a decapitated this lion probably said Allah Akbar yo guys thank you so much for listening I want to read out the patreon names yeah do that these are the newest members to the [ __ ] Taniya Hina clan to the to the pack these people just want wild joins our patreon page patreon.com/lenguin y'all hi Don John little dinky sounds great Gregg then we have Jamie Paul - first name sounds trans yeah hi Jamie Paul then we got Nick Benelli Nick but Nellie are you doing you work at a piece of real oh this is cute we have a couple patreon page Maddy and Patrick style snap guys kill Maddy and Patrick MMPs Maddy and Patrick sound like they're probably from Suffolk probably got married out of high school everything they do together then we got Jim Rodriguez Jimmy Rodriguez he sounds like a he sounds like a ref from Little League Jim Rodriguez he also sounds like a guy who's like he's a Spanish guy but like he also rose with the Italian mob Rodriguez oh here's a good one here's a good this person's name of their patron and they've just joined is pseudo penis all day cuz is it really yeah yeah that's the guy who's gonna bake you a cake or kill you in your sleep I'll kill you but I tell you what he is he is the ppw of the Widodo penis of the week or she whoever it is and who's the true blue psychopath of the week the true blue psychopath that [ __ ] Puma that [ __ ] Puma or the Austin that guy Austin who murders whole family yeah well he's yeah he's a money gets a whole month yeah then we got Lawrence Dixon hold on Lauren sticks and I got something for you yep good there you go Lawrence and and you get that you get that specifically because instead of spelling your name the regular way which would be lawr ence you spell it la you are ence [ __ ] yeah true blue cycle true blue cycle but thank you for your service love you Lawrence yeah then we got Paul Ninan not Paul Newman Paul Ninan he sounds like he was good in math kc rodriguez rodriguez could be um just like a fun-loving guy or smoking-hot girl yeah they were getting a lot of trans names yeah Steven Lin Mark Steven Lim mark sounds like a true-blue owner of some big company then we have just one name Ryan Ryan why one name Ryan yeah sounds like a bad guy in an 80s movie sounds like a black comic yeah um Nicole Rosati you know Nicole Rosati sounds kill ya and then here we got to round out the bunch this is Zack get [ __ ] get your hands in your pants for this guy this guy's name is John Hitler so cause we got a new true blue psychopath yeah John Hitler John Hitler [ __ ] wall name you may tell me your pronounce be pronouncing Heitler but it's Hitler cuz it's H ITL er yeah walkin why listen guys join our channel we're all by the way I'm sorry I'm sorry to cut you off before because again it's 2018 and this is to the public and it's not it's not the history it's not just our patreon members I do want to say that I enjoy comedy from all different backgrounds diversity ethnic groups when I made the joke about one name black comic that's a stereotypical thing a stereotypical joke that comics make of all different races and colors that say that you know sometimes black african-american I'm sorry comedians or just um you know comedians who are not white we'll use one name in their comedy uh you know as their name they'll just use one name which is totally fun which is totally fine and cool but I just want to say that Ryan if you feel offended or anyone listen podcast felt offended by my joke I'm not gonna apologize but I just want to make it clear that I do love comedy from all different races religion creeds and colors yes and if you want to do comedy with one name and do somebody else's jokes and [ __ ] the stool for 20 minutes that's fine too that's totally fun that is art that I can't judge because I don't know what it's like to be african-american from Georgia yes I don't know the name is lightning bolt or yeah terror squad yeah and you're from Mississippi and that's your journey it is what it is but I just want to make it clear that I support everybody yeah and guys join our channel for our patreon only bonus episodes for our matriarch members for this episode we're gonna be talking about wasp yeah [ __ ] yeah going in on the history of wasps on our bonus episode for this week so thanks for listening [Music] [Music]

Channel: History Hyenas

Views: 21,158

Rating: 4.9291139 out of 5

Keywords: Chris Distefano, chris Distefano comedy, Yannis Pappas, Chris Distefano Podcast, History Hyenas, Mike Suarez, The Bonfire, bayridge boys, chris delia, joe rogan, joe rogan experience, jre, bryan callen, joey diaz, bert kreischer, tom segura, ladder 14, andrew schulz, andrew schultz, comedy, comedian, podcast, entertainment, comedy club, near me, jokes, history, tom sawyer, huckleberry finn, american literature, mark twain dave chappelle, mark twain prize, mark twain award

Id: IxOyy0D7O50

Length: 62min 13sec (3733 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 11 2019