Joe Rogan Experience #1994 - Theo Von

[Music] by night Austin Texas what what a pop you got last night that was a lot of pressure that was a lot of pressure they went crazy one of the nice things about these shows that we do is that no one knows who's going to be on them these Joe Rogan and Friends shows so it could be a surprise you were surprised last night yeah and uh we got we got video of it is it uh on the mothergram mothership Instagram yeah right oh yeah yeah look at this do they have a pop all right here we go [Applause] [Applause] bro you got a stand and go what's up that's crazy dude you spent the first 30 seconds of your set high-fiving people Come On Son look at this look at this it was crazy some dude threw some semen up at me I think real human like in that movie um Silence of the Lambs yeah I don't know if it was real or not yeah yeah maybe it's a guy locked in the cell yeah I batted it down I respected it but yeah people that dude that was awesome man thank you congrats my pleasure congrats because I remember last time I was here you just we went and you know you were you walked me through and you're like this is where the light's gonna go when you go on like you had everything too how long ago was that that was last July okay so last July there was uh that we hadn't even raised the floors yet right y'all were just talking about it yeah that was that was before we lowered the ceiling and raised the floors that was so you got in when it looked like a movie theater still looked like the old movie theater right yeah I think you were just talking about adjusting the floor Heights and doing something like that yeah dude it was all I mean that was crazy that was probably that was a highlight of my I mean that was a highlight of my life I think I think so too because you get to be a surprise like there's not as much surprises anymore in the world you know it's true so to have a moment where you're like part of a surprise I think felt really yeah that's that's what it looked like yeah so that so when you were there it was all rough and everything was you know just beginning so you were there in the early days it's weird to be in there now because I mean I almost sound crazy but I feel like that place has always been there it's weird like the club has always been there yeah the club it's like it's it's like it was waiting for us um like a Stephen King book for real like that that that I've never been in a building that felt more like it was conscious the place feels conscious my daughter's in the ghosts and [ __ ] and she has this uh this thing that she puts on this uh this headphone that's connected to some some box and someone will ask questions and the the Box will pick up like random signals and you're blindfolded and you listen to this and so uh they they do this to test places for ghosts and she says that place is haunted she said the club is yeah oh I believe that I could see it being haunted probably she's also 12. well I'm older than her but I could I would agree with her probably I mean I could see there being I will say this it felt like there was some kind of um it fell I I can understand when you say like this feels like it should have been there over time in history like it's already like was just supposed to land there you know that's what it feels like it really does it was cool man I walked into the green it was just crazy there's like that big snake is like in there's like a snake in the table Yeah and then they had Ron White is sitting there you know and then um Tom seguro was in there uh David tell was in there Louis Katz um crazy and I don't know Ian's last name but it was yeah dude it was awesome man and just to see it come to fruition that was the I think that's the thing that was really exciting it was like wow like if somebody thinks about something and they're really focused on it that they can make something real you can actually make something happen yeah and I've never done that before this is the first time I've ever done that it was it was yeah I think it was inspiring probably in ways I don't even realize because sometimes you get inspired and then it like just hits you later you know but yeah but it was awesome man thank you it was cool my pleasure yeah you did I mean you yeah you guys are making it happen yeah it's crazy it is yeah it's uh but it you know I always kind of knew you could do something like that but doing it actually doing it and actually watching take part and doing it like relatively low stress it was relatively low stress like it's you know except for a few issues that you have to deal with at the club it's not not a big deal yeah you know and y'all don't have food right yeah that's a big one oh [ __ ] food there's yeah all the condiments and all of that just stains everything and gets on everything I feel like oh now you get roaches and all kinds of other [ __ ] and roaches love ketchup I'm bad do they everybody loves catching yeah yeah I like ketchup on hot dogs oh dude I bet if you could really get it out of a roach if you [ __ ] tickled him hard enough he'd tell you he liked it I like relish is my favorite yeah but we got food next door on both sides of us yeah they got everything shitty Mexican food and shitty Pizza yeah just what Comics deserve too we got some good pizza last night though they got some good I'm not eating it but uh a towel got something from some high-end Pizza Place Hoboken something Pizza something he's the funniest man yeah they had um a lot of ghost stuff like I grew up in Louisiana right and so ghosts and ghosts and stuff was a big part of the history you know especially in the South you know I think um what do you think a ghost is a ghost probably just some busy body that just didn't get all their stuff done oh they were lazy when they were alive so they hang around after like you know what it's like it's like those dudes who would hang around the high school after they already graduated yeah like what are you doing loser look at this ghost over here yeah look at this ghost oh they had a dude uh who would bring like uh who was always dating like an underage chick and you know and like hand the McDonald's over the fence at our school oh god oh and everything how old was he oh everybody thought he was damn Prince Charles everybody thought he was like the luckiest guy in the world but yeah he was older he just like was an adult and like a 20 year old adult or like a 30 year old adult it gets exponentially creepier right and like if if you just graduated and you're 18 and your girlfriend is 17 that [ __ ] is completely normal yeah you know but if you're 19 and she's 17. people start to look a little sideways huh that extra 12 months makes a big difference if you're 20 and she's 17. people will get very upset with you even in places where it's legal where it is legal in a few places which is kind of weird yeah and if you are 35 and she's 17 you can't be a comedian anymore are you sure I don't know who knows I mean who knows who knows I don't know but it's weird like what's legal versus what's okay like it really depends on men right because uh with men like if a 17 year old boy if if some 40 year old lady [ __ ] a 17 year old boy I'm like all right dude how was it is she crazy what's going on if she's hot and he's not coerced and drugged who cares but if a 40 year old man is banging a 17 year old girl I get very upset yep isn't that interesting it's a very different standard for men and women well now I think a lot of women can be like uh they can manipulate men too of course they can they've always been able to do right but that never really kind of gets brought into context like a lot of older teacher women they can manipulate a young fella oh they're getting busted all the time they're always getting busted but they get this they get don't do that again hey stop blowing kids that's what they get they get a little slap on the wrist yeah they don't go to jail they go to jail for blowing kids now you think they don't no I think they have like a little [ __ ] trial and everything and they go hey get out of here yeah just get just go crazy dick sucker yeah we're gonna get you an Uber you need to go home unless she's trying to get the the 17 year old to impregnate her hmm then you need to go to jail you freaky [ __ ] yeah I think I won some 17 year old's life with a kid yeah well not just a kid a kid with you you know he doesn't know what's going on he's just trying to bust a nut and then all of a sudden he has a responsibility of raising a child and you're making him get a job and he's going to [ __ ] pay bills what about his future he's gonna fail science I know that why just because he's not gonna be able to do it all he's not gonna be able to have the job and get to school and do it all and take care of the kid I don't think I you know well good news is it takes nine months for the kid to come out so you have nine months of prep time well you get your [ __ ] together do a lot of men you think you use that time to really grow up when that's that you think God that's why God made it that long of a time period I do not think God had men in mind when he was doing that no if there is a God I think they just wanted to make sure that the baby's a complicated organ or complicated organism rather very complicated more complicated than any other child of any other animal that's ever been born human babies are the weirdest really yeah that's why they come out so vulnerable every other animal comes out and they can move around for the most part although I did see a deer uh just a couple of days ago on my street I was going for a walk and the mama mama deer bounced off a little and I saw this little tiny little tiny baby deer squatted down and laid down the grass because that's what they do when they're really really young because they can't run away from anything so their best strategy is to kind of blend in and hide that's why they have those white dots all over their body the white dots like say if they're in Grass the white dots obscure their their shape so predators might not see and I think there's something about their smell Google that we have we finally have internet again Google uh what is the smell of newborn fawns because I think there's like some strategy that nature has with their smell um yeah the baby deer has no scent so predators that may depend on their sense of smell have difficulty finding the young deer the mother always close at hand tends to Circle back towards where her baby lies to get the attention of the Predator yeah that's what they did with us so they're like that deal they're like that oh it's false it says it's false oh this one's where the [ __ ] is the first one from the Henderson State University what a [ __ ] [ __ ] University no go to the top is that where it's from that's it what a [ __ ] hey I got my [ __ ] degree from Henderson Dan Henderson he's a principal I asked him what baby deer smell like he goes what are you a [ __ ] douchebag smelling deers this is false uh [ __ ] pop-up for a [ __ ] outdoor tactical backpack this is false their unique scent is how their mothers identify them in fact they urinate on their tarsal Blends daily even when just a few days old oh they're freaks man they're pissing on themselves going crazy Elk elk piss on themselves when they're when they're horny really yeah the the dick is hard and the dick flops up and down when they scream their dick flops and they start pissing all over themselves they piss all over themselves I've never been that look at this guy I've never been that horny this dude's horny as [ __ ] he's a young fella that's on a big elk even though they're big because they're all big but that is like a a smaller elk that's like a 300 inch elk if I had a guest campaigns might correct me look at his dick though he's got his dick face yeah [ __ ] scratching on the ground and he's trying to get his scent and he got that limb on him huh look he's got his dicks flopping around see he's pissing all over himself and then he's laying around he's like oh they want to [ __ ] so bad that's Joe's juice right there nothing is serving huh you know what's crazy about them they're only horny like that for like a month yeah thank god dude they would ruin a schoolyard I mean we are if they're horny and people get stupid oh they go selfie they get [ __ ] speared like a 700 pound super athlete I wouldn't hate having that much wiener I feel like really you don't know until you have it you just have to find the right gals no I don't think so you think so I think so I feel no no no no no no no no no no don't show me this don't show me this I think this one was okay this actually wasn't the one I was looking for oh you crazy [ __ ] get the [ __ ] away from that thing it just happened to Christ the Bison kind of attack but it didn't happen why are people so goddamn stupid for the gram you know how many people have died taking selfies they this I saw this video the other day on Instagram this lady who died taking a selfie on the side of a cliff and can you imagine too the like because you know what's going on you there's a moment where you realize oh I'm taking a selfie and I'm gonna die no I don't think they realize it until it's too late see she I was posing for a picture here in the Bison sort of just to get the [ __ ] away from me yeah he just gave her a little of that like get the phone look at her she's so uncoordinated yeah they're stupid backpack filled with [ __ ] Capri Suns it's falling down dope [ __ ] potato chips in her backpack and [ __ ] oh dude I saw a monkey uh at a young black woman fight over a bag of chips there's a bunch of those you can steal your [ __ ] Cambodia yeah they don't steal your [ __ ] they run up on your table and steal your food right off your plate [ __ ] you yeah [ __ ] you give me that sandwich I just run off with it they don't care they don't care did you hear about was it India where the monkeys started uh jacking puppies in India a dog killed a monkey so these monkeys went on a rampage and started chucking puppies off roofs oh they would carry puppies to the top of roofs I'm like right [ __ ] Chuck them off the roofs hmm like a Maltese monkeys blame for hundreds of puppy deaths captured in India so they'd bring them up to the top of a [ __ ] building and throw them villagers claim animals were carrying out revenge killings after dogs killed an infant monkey speaking of which have you seen what's going on with orcas so a female Orca The Matriarch the the head of this female Orca pack the head is the orcas what are you talking about killer whales oh damn all right that's Orca so um they started sinking boats and they're teaching each other how to sink boats apparently this boat [ __ ] up one of these Orcs because sometimes what happens is something will go wrong and a propeller will hit they they've happened all the time with sharks it's happened with whales propellers will [ __ ] up a dolphin oh yeah my friend Dave got pushed off a boat in his and he got hit by it when we went we went over him he got pushed off the front oh Jesus I'm not sure he wasn't that great to start off with but he it didn't help him but I don't think it harmed it much you know it's like it helps some people some people get whacked in it you know that Kennison and Roseanne are my two favorite examples they both get hit by cars wildest people I know well I don't know Kennison but I know Roseanne real well she got hit by a [ __ ] car when she was 15. bad she was in a mental institution for nine months afterwards she couldn't she was a straight A student she couldn't count afterwards she couldn't do math couldn't do anything that's unreal she got the lady um there was a um she was driving towards the sun and the lady couldn't see and Roseanne walked right into the street when she was 15 and got [ __ ] clipped by a car from back then you know those big old [ __ ] sleds Caprice or something like that some giant [ __ ] those ltd's or whatever yeah yeah yeah yeah some big ass stupid [ __ ] car just cracked her so the three three so this is an orca attack in Portugal so they started doing this is it say they're both suddenly something hit us so this is this is from 2021 but what I'm talking about is very recently yeah you know this was in the article it's just an example of it like the content so it's happening quite a bit off the Iberian Coast the Iberian orcas has taught at least nine other whales to attack and Destroy Rudders wow so it was like a middle eastern thing I just think it's a thing with a particular area where the orcas in that particular area have had problems with people I see and so they've decided to let them know who the [ __ ] is the boss take action yeah they're [ __ ] on people's boats hard to tell what's happening in the video but they explain broad bring fish I'd be like I'm not that dude I'm your friend yeah here's a mackerel here's your macro here's a can of tuna I would bring them yeah but they might be a little upset about the cans I think they I'd put it on a plate I'd played it for them I don't think they like plates either oh that's a good point actual full mackerel's the way to go you know a tune is just for us like tuna fish in a can yeah any weird that that one fish we decided to just [ __ ] can up all the time like you can't turn into sandwiches everything yeah like tuna salad tuna this tuna that's all tuna yeah tuna really got the it's gotten the brunt of it huh oh my God I bet other fish like uh thank God we're not tuna yeah yeah they I mean they they're like the most canned fish ever yeah right like what gets canned they can some salmon yeah but canned salmon I think is a little pricier too much more there's a really good company I forget what the company is called but they do wild caught they all do lime caught salmon so you're getting wild salmon nut rice and they then they can it so it's real good for you my sister used to have a bass that was in their house and it was like it couldn't even turn around in the tank oh that's [ __ ] up I don't think it minded I bet it did I don't know of course it did it lived there for a long time that's what they say to guys in solitary I don't think he Minds oh yes let's buy himself in there especially if it's a bass you can't talk to him you know he's probably like get me the [ __ ] out of here I want to be on a lake I want to be eating frogs you [ __ ] he's just watching cops out of one eye with my sister he's watching 90 Day Fiance what the [ __ ] is wrong with people keep me in this goddamn Bowl I'm a bass stupid [ __ ] I used to have piranhas yeah of course you did man who doesn't think you did I had this uh one house that I lived in when I was living by myself I uh there was like an indoor Courtyard to this house and uh I literally actually consulted construction people I was gonna create like a miniature Jurassic Park in this Courtyard I was gonna seal it off and put crocodile monitors in and have like a little hatch where I could release a rabbit and watch them kill it and watch them kill it yeah but then I had like a come to Jesus moment like what the [ __ ] is wrong with you yeah why do you want to do that oh I think it would be I would like to have a small something like that maybe in the home you know I did like having the piranhas and was that where you uh and were you was at like a goal of yours do you think or were you just like okay this is my first place I want to design it how I want or you just it was because that's a big thing to think about it was I first first getting money yeah first thing I got with money I got a nice car like whoa got a nice car now and then I was like what other [ __ ] can I have like I don't have any responsibilities back then I was 27. free yeah free as a bird and um I just was buying stupid [ __ ] you know I had three pit bulls dang bro that's sick they were great dogs though yeah they're the best dogs man well I don't say that my dog is the best dog the golden retriever they're the best pet ever they're just so full of love and they're just so but there's something about pit bulls man they're just so loyal they love you so much really you think more than a different type of dog I don't know man I don't know I wonder if we could tell I wish we could tell how much dogs love us or or not you know my dog is like so domesticated he's so sweet and he's not like remotely threatening to anybody anybody comes over the house you're my best friend like if you come over my house tonight he'd be like Theo he'd be like so happy be whining and running around you in circles and stuff he just loves everybody wow but pit bulls are like they're just they just have so much more tenacity they're so angry yeah they're just so full of [ __ ] just wrong and they just want to play and just want to kiss you and they just like they're so full of life yeah they'll [ __ ] hug you till you're dead oh they want to when when I would come home from work my dogs would literally like just jump on me just jump on me I would lay on the ground it would just swarm me and kiss me yeah they almost have ground game a little bit huh they got a little ground game I used to teach them yeah I'd get side control on them I teach them how to hit Escape but you gotta put your paw here gotta create space I get a bit of rear naked choke oh shrimps he loved it dude my friend uh when I was working when I was in the um I was in the busboy industry a long time ago you know and um the first gay I ever met the first gay dude I ever met this dude Billy conforto how old are you I was probably 14 right that was the first day you ever met yeah that ever met straight on no no he was probably 30. so and he uh was like the toughest gay dude so he could like fight and he was gay nobody had ever seen it you know that's scary for a homophobe oh to [ __ ] you up and suck your dick no that's the biggest or make you suck his that's the crazy part with no teeth he punches all your teeth out oh that's gotta be crazy so that changed the game for a lot of home phones because of like who's this queer you know dude and then you're like oh if that dude knocks me out and then makes love to me it's gonna be a o for two tonight yeah it's a that's a more than two points yeah it's like a 10-8 round yeah but Billy had pit bulls and he sold weed and everything we get so high and then I would get so scared of the dogs man that I had to go outside a lot of times oh yeah because I couldn't he was like more um he'd be a lot more comfortable around him and stuff but I would get high and and then I would just get scared around the dogs what's the dog I can kill you that's what's crazy it's like they're they're real sweet and everything and if you get a good one you train them right and raise them right they're so loyal and they're so affectionate but the power that they have is so wild yeah I mean Billy would put on like an Adidas tracksuit and make him like attack things in his yard and [ __ ] so he was like oh so he was training him to be like that he was but he also loved him but he like also was like from a tough area so you know there was a value in having the dogs be tough yeah there's a lot of people that have that right they have dogs that are just protection yeah around their house all the time if you live in a rough area there's no better thing than dogs they let you know when people are there everyone's scared of them it's not you know they'd rather break into a house that doesn't have dogs oh a lot of people if they didn't have a dad they would have a dog you know yes yeah yeah if you're young yeah you have a few dogs the wife would get a dog a lot of times if they didn't if they didn't have a husband I remember but there was a lot of dangerous dogs in my neighborhood growing up the problem is when they get loose oh yeah one of dangerous dogs you don't do a good job of containing them I was always worried about my dog getting out my dog Frank Sinatra he was uh he was a pit bull that was uh bred for hog hunting in Hawaii they braid they breed them different and they bring them they actually have longer ears it's really interesting they're almost like Labrador ears because the whole idea is that they're picking up scent you know dogs pick up scent with their ears that's why Bloodhounds have those crazy long ears really uh-huh as they're running it's like you know how you fart and you like waft up the smell like oh what is that Jesus Christ well dogs are doing that with their ears as they're running they're wafting up these scents so they could pick up little minuscule particles of sense as they're washing up and my pit bull had longer ears he had ears almost like a labrador but he was a pure pit bull but big [ __ ] head just jacked body and he would oh like dogs would come like dogs that were loose would come to the fence and and [ __ ] with them and he would go crazy he just couldn't couldn't get to them and they would be [ __ ] with them and one dog pissed on his fence like it just lifted his leg of a Labrador came by pissed on his fence and so he started slamming his head into the metal bars like so his wrought iron metal bars and he slams his head into the bar and he's like mostly head right and pitbulls are like 50 head and he's just like [ __ ] he gets his [ __ ] head through and I hear all this noise and uh I'm alone in the house and then I hear I hear this noise and I look out the window and I see Frank with his head like wedged between the bars and I see this dog right outside the gate oh there was pissing and I was like oh my God he's gonna get out and so I run up to the up to the fence and I get to him right when his ass pops through the he bent the bars and he got out and so it's me running down the street in my socks chasing this dog and Andy do Frank maybe he plowed this dog right into a pile of trash cans right in my neighbor's trash cans and I got a hold of his collar right before it got ugly I'm like [ __ ] so then I had to have another bar welded all around the perimeter of my fence to keep him from separating the bars so this Israeli dude came over here and he was the welder guy and the fence guy you know and uh he's like what happened to your fence and I said the dog did it he goes this [ __ ] fence this dog bent these [ __ ] fence with his head I go yeah the dog peed out there he goes bro I go yeah that's a crazy dog that's it's a different kind of dog oh That's Mike Perry dude yeah different kind of dog they don't they don't care about pain pain doesn't mean a [ __ ] thing to them they just want to get you yeah get out like this dog was like I don't think the dog was I think the dog was like being friendly like you're like oh smell my pee you know he's a labrador right he's just looking around like I'll piss over here he's like oh I'm gonna see a gap probably didn't even know what a pit bull was yeah yeah this dog's a lot louder than me yeah what's going on over here oh God that dog's wearing a that dog has a chain I had this one neighbor then had a dog that he never trained I mean at all it was basically a wild dog that he fed it was a boxer and this dog wouldn't listen to anybody when they leave him in the house like if they left the screen so like they left the door open the screen the dog would just fly through the screen just burst through the screen and go out and then he'd come home when he was ready yeah dog he just had his own like plan or whatever they were just idiots they were they were really frustrating oh look at this dog is that a pit bull too yeah look at him that's what he did that's what my dog did oh yeah it bend the bars man yeah they're they're a different kind of animal God you gotta you gotta really make sure that your perimeter is secure with a dog like that but this this dog was not a dangerous dog it's just a little a little boxer I think I just got so nerd I think just like I would be so nervous around them you know and um but it should be if they're not trained well and we didn't grow up around any dogs oh you know except for like dogs that were in our neighborhood we didn't like just and they were more violent animals we didn't have any like dogs in our home or any experience around dogs you know I remember first time I ever even met a uh indoor dog it was I don't know a dog could even be indoors right and I was at my buddy Scott's house and they had a Golden Retriever and this [ __ ] came around the corner dude and I was like who in the [ __ ] is that I mean it was like the most beautiful thing I mean it was just like fluffy oh beautiful gorgeous [ __ ] long gone hair it was like Suzanne Somers you just coming and I was like damn that thing is [ __ ] fine you know Summers I just never seen a dog look like they had like gotten a good night's sleep you know Suzanne Summers with the Thigh Master yes all she had was a this spring that just tightening up your [ __ ] muscle because that's what you're doing like there's a lot of like it's not squatting for your butt it's not lunges you're just tightening up them [ __ ] muscles squeeze that dick squeeze that dick squeeze that dick thing's gonna Gleek by the time you get done with it dude just see if you can find the ad for the Thigh Master a lot of ladies bought that too because they wanted to look like Suzanne Summers look is this a spring she's still looking good and she's like a thousand years old oh yeah she's still looks really good in my head one of the biggest blunders in all of Television though her and Three's Company Three's Company that was a great show what happened was crazy negotiations she wanted more money she was demanding more money because she had become a giant star and so they basically relegated her to she wasn't even on the show anymore like there was one episode where she made a phone call and she called them like she was on vacation and that was her in the episode her and some totally different location calling them on the phone and then they eventually replaced her yeah I remember they got a new woman I think it was like you know she got an aggressive agent it might have been a husband one of those deals yeah and I was like I got this I'm gonna [ __ ] you deserve more money yeah it's just like what happened with um caller daddy that's a similar situation you know the caller daddy podcast oh yeah yeah Alex um what's her name Colin no uh Cooper Alex Cooper yeah her name is she had a co-host right and the co-host had a boyfriend who was an agent something Franklin Sophia Franklin is that it got it and then Portnoy told us the whole story oh he did yeah it was like the dude thought that like she's gonna be this she's a [ __ ] star you need to pay her more and like you know they had a deal the deal's deal she wanted more and then there was negotiations and her husband yeah so her husband former television producer Alan Hamill went to negotiate for asking for 150 000 a week which was the average that men were earning on television at the time okay it's not television that's like saying well brain surgeons make this I'm a plumber so I deserve it and on par with what her co-star Ritter was making John Ritter she said she didn't know at the time that Ritter was making more since the three of them had a Favored Nations Clause was that I mean again favorite favorite Nations I think is like chair what is it it's in I thought that means you all make the same amount is that what it means no I think it's a it's a Inuit thing isn't it no no no no that's First Nation uh mfn provision is a term included in a contract for products or services that prevents the seller from selling its products or services to the buyers competitors for a lower price or on better terms Oh I thought this [ __ ] was a Choctaw dude I didn't know what they were talking about Favored Nations contract of I want what she's getting Favored Nations you know agents will ruin a lot of stuff oh God yeah it's unfortunate huh yeah omnipresent in entertainment contracts certainly because it's fair the post exposure to the the favorite Nations Clause are relatively simple to describe there are contractual commitment that no other relevant party will receive better or more of that advantageous terms from the party making the commitment that makes sense so like so if you and I were doing a show we would have a favorite nation's deal where we both make exactly the same amount of money which is fair so I care like she probably didn't know that he was getting paid because John Ritter was a giant star at the time yeah and that is um oh yeah John Ritter yeah John Ritter he was incredible he did an episode of news radio did he really yeah yeah he was cool man so that was them back in the day man it was a great [ __ ] show he was so talented the [ __ ] some guy ruined it didn't he do noises off that movie too what was that noise is off I don't know what that is that a death movie I don't know dude I'll tell you this one time I was walking down the street in New York and they had a deaf group or whatever like a Gaggle or whatever I don't know what it's called but they got together and they were outside of a bar talking and I'm walking up and I'm like I thought maybe like the world had like shut off or something I couldn't hear because I'm seeing all these people interacting but nobody was there was no sound and I get close and uh here it is Noises Off never seen this I don't even what his noises are I do recognize that scene with Christopher Reeves I thought John Ritter was in there yeah he is he is he is he is I'm doing a theatrical play but it's a movie yeah it's a movie it's like one shot it never ends or something oh interesting okay but um is it good yeah something to check out it's an old movie out he was a real sweet guy he was real everybody loved him he was on the set of news radio for a week and just a super nice guy like sometimes you meet people and you hope they're gonna be nice because they're nice on TV you know but they're not yeah and it's really frustrating it's weird like they're creepy to you or they're shitty to you because you're an actor and you're like oh wow you're kind of a [ __ ] you're fake you're faking it for television but in real life you like this weird snipey sort of shitty [ __ ] insulting person yeah I met a few of those too yeah yeah it's very frustrating because you're like I thought you were nice I saw you on TV you're nice just trying to say hi and you're [ __ ] [ __ ] to me yeah yeah we were supposed to Michael Landon was supposed to come to our town um no it wasn't Aquaman the man from Atlantis was he yeah I didn't see that hey was he on a little house in the prairie yeah I think he was on the man from Atlantis too wasn't he good boy I remember everybody was swim like the man from Atlantis when I was a kid I really swim like this because he swam like almost like a dolphin he didn't swim like a person well dude you have to think the first one no who was it who's the man from Atlantis who was the the main actor Patrick Duffy Patrick Duffy that's right I confuse those two well Joe you have to think probably the first people oh wow that dude man from Atlantis yeah that guy's got a hard drive yeah that was that was the man from Atlantis yeah it was like a big show bro 1977 and 1978 Jesus Christ one year that was a big show all right it was you yeah yeah I think you just like this show for some reason he would swim real funny man see if he could find man from Atlanta swimming because he he would swim in this like weird way and so when I was a kid me and my friends when we would go swimming we would [ __ ] copy the man from Atlantis like that to this day sometimes when I'm swimming in the pool like that see how he swims what nobody swims like that you swim like a fish man watch bro but look how fast he swims nobody can [ __ ] with him he swim like a dog this is stupid I think he jumped up did you grab a fish oh this is yeah he could jump he jumped up better than the dolphin did totally made sense this is all bro he's from he's touching her tit what's going on there oh he had webbed fingers oh he did yeah had webbed fingers oh I'd hate that did he talk good if you were swimming yeah he talked yeah but trying to get a mitten on would just [ __ ] that would suck God Minton would be easy glove would be the real problem yeah you're right yeah Mitten would be great men's are really the move man unless you I mean take your [ __ ] glove off you need to use your fingers like how good are your fingers working when you have a glove on very bad yeah but mittens your [ __ ] stays warm oh all them little fingers nestled them up against each other keeping each other warm yeah you know I don't even pull the I'll open the end and be like y'all have fun it's a little warm party dude that's why sometimes I think like I would hate to have like one of those long wieners like what were we looking at the elk yeah because you keep going back to that well you have to think though while I was trying to figure out what a conversation we were talking about um but think how much weiner isn't in the recipient right there's a certain amount of dick that is a problem like if you have a 12-inch dick you're an idiot how many people how many people can enjoy that 12-inch dick like how many girl probably more guys can take it you probably might have to go gay because guys can take some Preposterous sticks oh yeah that's a duck dick ducks have the crazy sticks what ducks have dicks that are as long as their body oh my God there's this Corkscrew well ducks are rapists by the way and the female duck does not want that so the female Duck's vagina is not like a straight shot it's like a [ __ ] Labyrinth you gotta find your way through the passage and that and it's got spikes on it see the little spikes all over the doctor yeah duck ducks are horrible they when they get a female duck they rape them they bite them and then they just [ __ ] and so the female duck can allow the male duck in or not in she can stop the process of if it that's why they have these Corkscrew dicks like nature hasn't made them through yeah this [ __ ] like when you're trying to get your hand into a vending machine like look at the duck vagina and look at the duck dick so that even the duck vagina is all curly and twisty it's not a straight shot so for the female to let the male in she has to want to breed it seems like neither one of them wants to have sex with the other ones they definitely do but the way they do it is awful like I've seen it at like uh like a pond it's like you just go Jesus should I step in here yeah should I stop there do you see that guy guy got arrested because he helped a bison a baby bison and they had wound up euthanizing it the mother wouldn't accept it I guess there was a baby bison at Yellowstone and was having a hard time Crossing something and so this guy got out and helped it I didn't see it yeah that's it right there so oh look at that pervert that look at him he's a nice guy he was just trying to help the baby bison so because it was touched I guess the female just didn't want it anymore because it had the scent of the guy which is [ __ ] weird it says the herd rejected it the herd rejected it what scent like Winston's well it smelled humans yeah he's got [ __ ] cheeseburger for sure look at him Winston's camels no filters yeah exactly like what's on his fingers but no I think I would hate that man if you had a long wiener right right think of how much weiner is not in there yeah and just like being in the cold you know your dick will get cold well I just think like you ever been in like a sleeping bag or whatever in your feet are hanging out the bottom right your dick would be out in cold yeah it's like the base of your dick would be so lonely oh the base of your dick will get no attention yeah possibly would probably be annoying for a girl like just I'd like dick what is this stupid [ __ ] giant dick that hurts yeah this never-ending dick it's like watching a long movie I bet you're like oh you ever watch a porno where a girl is uh sucking a guy's dick and it's just ridiculous it's just like sucking this microphone oh it's too big yeah it's crazy that poor guy the poor girl and poor guy the most both both be frustrated yeah it's just like watching something I don't know a lot of it sometimes for me seems like man with world's biggest penis stun's host with explicit pick Philip and Josie react to the world's biggest penis 13 and a half inches whoa his name is Jonah Fallon New York actor wow wow let me see this dude I don't want that I just that's the guy oh my God yeah that's see that's the kind of dick that you have oh look at that wand on him homie that's a hog my God boy dang dude imagine getting directions from that guy so he's showing it to them scroll down so there he shows it to him fire this is hard you never have to compare it to these objects he just showed him as a [ __ ] I think he's saying it's about as big as that thing yeah but that makes sense 13 and a half inches but who wants that I just feel like if you had that much I would just hate it and say if you're walking to the restroom or something if you have a cat that cat's gonna attack that [ __ ] every time problems you're naked [Laughter] it's a dangling little cat toy oh dude you have to basically hold your dick up like this when you walk over to the back I can't walk around in it oh that's like guys with inflated balls 132 pound scrotum yeah that's just a disease though right yeah but same problem that he's explaining but it's a much worse problem because like it's a cancerous exactly it's like my 300 pound inmate or whatever what makes their their balls grow up that big what do they do about those by the way because it more than one dude is at his balls yeah it's called the scrotal lymphedema edema I don't think I want to look up pictures of this yeah you do you definitely do but let's get some smelling salts in the system first oh you want to yeah we're gonna look up giant scrotums getting operated off yeah oh Jesus let's fire up let's fire up let's go all right but you first oh man I've been waiting for this whoa he requested this ladies and gentlemen Here Comes Santa Claus right down Santa Claus Lane take a sniff ready hit it those are dead yeah this is dead I think that could be the older one and this could be the newer one but even still it's only supposed to last for like a week this one don't work time to order some we should always have some on the hand oh we got him got him got him that was gonna be dead and it was that must be our most recent one yeah so let's Chuck this one okay and uh oh let's order some we'll order like five more I mean I had three I think we've used them here we go Zone okay here we go boy [Music] [ __ ] yeah boy it's not fresh but it's good enough but it's strong yeah let me get one more that's good this is my high man that works this guy did it to his eyes why'd he do it to his eyes all right maybe it he's trying to did he get rocked no he's trying to wake up to go play probably he might have gotten rocked I don't know I'm gonna bring those to The Comedy Club yeah I'm gonna take a blast before I go on stage uh is that to catch it putting up last night before I go on stage dude um you know where I got to uh oh wow that'll wake you right the [ __ ] up one thing that um yeah I think there's something about that people have an extra wiener that makes things makes you angry like the world's not fair well that's how flat-chested girls feel and when other girls walk by with giant tits yeah that's a big one right because if you're just born with giant tits you just hit the genetic Lottery and every guy loves big tits they all love them they have no use for them they just want to squeeze them they just want to suck on them some of them are so big though yeah you can get too big just like a dick and you're just like God you could be like that Canadian teacher and teaches wood shop class with a giant rubber tits on it [ __ ] is we're woke at it where woke hits its final destination dude the vet the crazy part is that guy looks like Tim Dylan if you just put a regular picture of him oh yeah because he's like not really trans it's a scam so let's see what the operation is on this uh this guy's saccharoony what go to oh boy that's the Improvement look at the Improvement the Improvement is what's on the right oh we had nut in his legs the blockage of lymph nodes obviously but I guess your nut'll back up into your legs damn uh so it goes to his legs oh oh Jesus Christ and what do they do to drain it let's see oh look at that one it's like necrotic look at the far left I don't know look at that look at his butt look at his butt oh yeah click on that it's like his skin is dying oh Jesus how long do you have to wait before you go see a doctor I mean for real that seems like a little bit of putting off yeah that guy's guys you know he's turning into a tortoise it looks like that guy's got that hand green on him that's him he got better some dudes just oh he did get better look at him congratulations sir but imagine just bringing a bag in and people like what's in the bag you're like my nuts off but hold on it looks like they stuffed his nuts up into his stomach yeah look like in the left one he doesn't have a big belly in the right one maybe as soon as he get out he just start eating like a pig so finally well I'm sure once you can go out you want to go enjoy yourself you want to go to I guess but wouldn't you like concentrate on cleaning up your [ __ ] Health obviously you got something real wrong so what does it say here this is how it started over the next nine months every six days or so he would experience what he felt like a sensational carpet burn in his groin then severe cold and shaking followed by his scrotum growing uncontrollably larger and larger got so bad one day that I stood in my living room and cried he said there was a fresh breakage of the skin and it stung to knowing oh man he's getting [ __ ] stretch marks on his ball sack you ever had like where your toe like where your toe connects to your foot and it kind of will crack right there yeah all the time imagine like that happens on your nuts yeah because we were told connects with your foot kickboxing I would always get those always worse because you're pushing off with such extreme force with your toes and then your skin gets dry and things get cracked and I was always getting slices down there yeah I hate it I hate that it sucked because you're walking around your feet hurt yeah you kind of have to walk like this you get used to it but in the beginning you kind of have to just walk like this yeah um what else were we talking about but dicks big dicks oh big old dicks yeah because also people are starving in another country and you got this big old dick all on you right and you're fat yeah like that guy that actor he's eating well what is giant hog oh do you think like 13 and a half inches I would imagine girls like don't swipe right on you swipe right good or which what is the one you choose yes it's wiping right I'm not on the apps that's white it's right right yeah right so I bet if you say by the way I have a 13 half inch dick girls be like I want that yeah who wants that I think a lot of women would want to see it so it's almost like come back to my place come come back to my uh new house come see this giant egg oh yeah or like this like like this K like the animals Ferrari right like what was that then you were gonna make with the animals yeah like a terrarium yeah and then you just you go on the other side of the trail even like put your dick in like a little hole he's got a cameo but he's definitely done only fans right maybe he doesn't want people to see his dick he's still an actor you know maybe he's like still trying to make it out in that world that's the hardest world to make it in man in acting oh because they don't have to pick you you could be amazing and some shitty casting agent some shitty director they might not like you they might you might remind them of an ex-boyfriend they might think you're too confident or they might be playing Power Trip games yeah there's too much and there's another nepotism too it seems like in that industry oh yeah it's a lot of like you see so many people get opportunities where you're like man did that person really or was there where opportunities where their family was involved you know it's it's family involved but in more cases it's networking yeah it's like they they go they I dated a girl as an actress when I first came here and she always was networking so like I have to go to this party I have to meet these people I have to know these casting people I have to know these and I'm like oh and she would go around them and be so fake oh my God I love your dress like that kind of [ __ ] and you're like yeah exhausting because there's one thing if someone's like super complimentary yeah and they have nothing to gain for it like dude I love your shoes where'd you get those and you know it's pure it's nice it's like awesome like your hat I like your yeah I like your arms or whatever someone's complimentary of you look at you handsome [ __ ] yeah it's nice it's it's complimentary for no reason but there's something gross about when you know someone that I know this girl this is not how she is right she's kissing everybody's ass just to just appear nicer like maybe they'll think about her when I when a roll comes up maybe and so that forms their opinions on things too because that forms their political opinions because they find out what the political opinions of the casting people and the executives which is always left leaning yeah unless you're on Yellowstone you know you better you know you better be wearing a [ __ ] pride flag or something like you have to like be 100 Progressive liberal leading left-leaning yeah so these people alter their they alter their opinions of the world based on what is going to get them closer to the the Honeypot yeah you know oh yeah I think it's amazing that all of Hollywood has the same political beliefs all except Yellowstone a Taylor Sheridan guy oh yeah yeah he seems like an interesting guy have you met him no I need uh I've connected with him on text messages he's friends with Whitney but I admire that guy and his shows are [ __ ] amazing people love them dude yeah and his movies too he made that what was that [ __ ] movie the bank robbery movie with uh was Jeff Bridges in it God damn it was good I know the movie you know who I want to meet hell or high water that's it God damn he made sicario oh [ __ ] really sicario 2 kind of sucked with sicario with um oh no I'm thinking of something Benicio del Toro I love that dude yeah he seems like a cool [ __ ] Spanish people always seem cool I think because it's neat to say their name Benicio del Toro yeah he was in um uh the Johnny Depp movie about Hunter S Thompson Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas oh that was a great movie yeah there he is he he got fat for that movie too wow yeah that was a [ __ ] great movie that movie makes me want to do drugs oh God unless you want to do drugs and go to Vegas oh fun [ __ ] times he was also the werewolf do you ever see him in The Wolf Man love that you can see him looking in his eyes right there until he was he was good in The Wolf Man The Wolfman was kind of a cornball movie it was like a combination of CGI and like real like Rick Baker style makeup which is pretty cool but the wolf man you never saw it no find the the scene where uh Benicio del Toro transforms into the the werewolf because there's a scene when they're they've got him bolted down to a chair in an operating room and these give me some volume on this because these dudes they think he's insane [Music] has witnessed that's the full moon holds no sway over him but he remains the perfectly ordinary human being he will have taken his first small step down the long road to mental recovery yeah no this is good quite traumatic personal experiences he witnessed his mother's self-mutilizations his young mind unable to accept it created a Fantastical truth that his father is to Black that his father is literally a monster is that Nicholas Cage no your father is not a werewolf you were not bitten by a werewolf you will not become a werewolf any more than I will Sprout wings and fly out of that window that's how they did medicine back then in a theater isn't that weird so he did operations wow has something to say to us no sedatives he's got something to say to them foreign night I will kill all of you wow as you can see like countries oh man [Applause] oh this is badass it's a great scene the movies but this scene is [ __ ] dope [Music] wow [Music] [Music] oh dang oh look at that pervert huh is it David Spade oh that's crazy man it's a good scene yeah it is really good but you see he was like kind of half goofy yeah it was like half a werewolf half of [ __ ] man some CGI like this is CGI it was good though I thought it's pretty good it looks really good for what's what time period was this this was a few years ago oh okay this is like 2011 uh 2010. dude remember Swamp Thing yeah I forgot about Swamp Thing I used to read the comic books really I never really knew what DC Comics Swamp Thing in our area people were so excited because it was Louisiana you know people were like [ __ ] yeah dude the swamp is back you know people like we got this we can do it we could do it we're heroes now yeah you could you'd see people's dads telling them don't you want to be like swamp things really yeah like people were just that was the big hero of Louisiana people were fired up there was a movie Swamp Thing wasn't there I'm googling now there's a bunch of recent stuff but I can't talk it's like uh yeah here I've been on YouTube there's uh that was the old movie that was the original movie it seems it says four years ago DC Universe original oh I think that's an animated that was the one it looks like I think something here Wes Craven but I don't know if that someone just typed his name I think oh I think Wes Craven did direct the Swamp Thing something was good though oh not long ago and the unexplored regions of an unmapped swamp the creative genius of one man collided with another's evil dream and a monster was born in Louisiana is back on the map yeah Swamp Thing I like to dreams and swamp thing's just riding a truck yeah did you ever interview Willie Nelson do you ever interview him no I would love to interview Willie Nelson I don't think I interview people I think I just talked to them that's a good point yes all right do you ever just talk to him no it's okay but I mean people have said that like about I love your interview and I'm always like yeah I mean kinda sorta it's really just a conversation well some people I think if you're curious on information from them yes then you want to ask them more things like about that they know about that you don't know about oh yeah for sure like if I'm talking to Michio Kaku or you know a Quantum physicist or something like that I ask questions I'm essentially interviewing them and especially it's something that I really have no understanding of yeah yeah but for the most part I'm just talking to people yeah which is like takes a lot of pressure off too because they're like what subjects you want to cover I'm like I don't know let's just talk yeah some people weirded out by that you know like you and I it's like we know each other so long we don't have to talk about what we're going to talk about we're just getting here and start rolling yeah it's a little easier too I think it gets easier too when you've been in here before yeah it's weird when you see people for the first time when you see them lock up and they're nervous and I'm and I'm always just like I'm Gonna Hold Your Hand we're gonna get through this I'm Gonna Get You 20 minutes in and you're gonna not even know you're here have you had people that really locked up yeah yeah yeah I've had people get real nervous and you see them breathing funny and they they can't talk that good because they can't get breath you know and but it's it's okay I was just like let's just let's calm this thing down yeah we're gonna be all right it's pretty normal I think some people trying something new but it's just weird the the numbers that's what weirds people out the numbers of humans that that freaks people out like you can't it's hard to just be yourself in front of millions of people yeah but you can and you do it I do it we do it yeah you can just be yourself you are the same [ __ ] dude if you and I are going having dinner somewhere or if we're at a comedy club or if we're here the same dude some people can't do that they they have to like put on a Persona when they're they're talking you know they get weirded out yeah I think sometimes that's interesting like um do you find that when you're doing podcasts I find uh I think sometimes I'm like which me is kind of showing up more today and that might sound a little [ __ ] oh no I know what you mean by that but like am I like a little agitated today am I feeling like goofy am I have you know kind of what's going on like am I a little curious today am I a little like uh inquisitive you know just which which part of me is kind of at the surface sometimes at the moment you know I had a revelation the other night that I forgot about I was on mushrooms and um I closed my eyes and I realize that in certain circumstances when I'm healthy when I'm when everything's going great I have a very specific frequency it's a different frequency and this this weird Revelation that I had while I was high told showed me this it was like it was almost like a lesson that I was learning and it was like here's you now you're very healthy you you just I had an IV vitamin drip that day I'd worked out I did the cold plunge did the sauna no conflicts no no problem in my personal life no problem in my business life everything was beautiful and I had this like [Music] and I and then it showed me there's times where you don't have that where you're irritable where you're you're tired where you're sick or you're hurt there's all these different frequencies that you have and it made me realize like you think about your health and you think about like how you feel and whether or not you're present you think it is just like it's better to just be this way but you don't realize that you're achieving a certain frequency I was achieving a certain frequency at that moment and I realized like this is attainable and this is what I should strive for and that I could stay at this frequency but one of the things it was telling me is that don't drink it was like right when I was like don't drink because if you're drinking right now you're gonna you're gonna kill this frequency it's gonna dull it like you might have less inhibitions but it will dull this frequency wow it was very interesting it was like one of them weird mushroom moments yeah where the mushrooms like hey I this is probably something you should think about because I don't think you think about it this way you just indulgent you know you do this you do that you have a size Pizza eating meatball sub what but what's going on with your your overall energy when you do that you really want your energy to be at the the best possible state but you don't think about it that way right but we yeah you don't think about it exactly like that way but we do think about it in ways like like our attitude like we have little words we use to describe like kind of like elements of it I guess but I wonder in the future if there will be a way that we can measure whatever that frequency is like sometimes it feels like we're kind of primitive in the understand in the like the quantifying of um like we take our temperature you know like just in things that we blood pressure yeah in little things that we used to evaluate us sometimes I feel like we're on a plane that feels really old sometimes like there should be like another plane where we start to like is there a number for what my frequency is today because you kind of feel that it's like where you operate at and yeah and there are things you can do to keep like I I keep earplugs in now for like the first hour and a half of my day right and it just keeps a lot of excess like noise the first hour and a half yep keeps them out I'm able to go through the things that I want to go through at home so how do you what do you do when you wake up you just put them in I keep them I I I I I I sleep with them man do you yeah you sleep with your earphones earplugs yeah I think I've heard everything that you can hear at night you know for a while I was scared I was gonna miss something or if something happened but I think it's like dude I'm not they're not doing anything new at night that I wouldn't have and I I wouldn't be able to just imagine is going on yeah I don't think there's a new invention of nighttime activities yeah so I got him in so I can I'll keep them in man and I'll go through like my morning routine and it's like what is your morning routine I pray right when I wake up uh do you have a specific prayer yeah just a Serenity Prayer you know grant me the serenity um to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can the wisdom to know the difference um and then sometimes I do like a one other prayer and then uh read like these couple of pages of like um that give me like and help me to look at my day from afar like what am I going to do today so that helps me like have a little bit more of a plan for my day even if it's not a strict plan it's like at least I'm looking at my day instead of feeling like my day is just like happening to you yes and so that those little things like that help me and then I'll do 10 minute meditation and then I do 10 minutes where I just write uh just whatever is going on in my head and do that every day yep how long have you been doing that I've been doing that probably pretty solid for I would say I don't know maybe three months but I've done pieces of that for probably five years what what started all that out um going get doing sober stuff like you get into that some of that world you know but it's but I think also just um like seeing how meditation gives me a little bit detached from myself so then I'm not like just clinging to everything that happens so it doesn't affect me immediately something can happen and there's a little bit of space between me and whatever is happening and that gives me a chance to look at it or manage a little bit more comfortably yeah that's a problem with getting caught up in the momentum of your day I do find myself in that spot sometimes I don't have that specific a routine as you do but maybe it's a good idea yeah for me I need it some people they can operate differently you know I think for me it helps to have a little bit of what's going on I remember watching this Kobe Bryant interview where he's talking about the first 10 minutes of every day when he wakes up he meditates 10 minutes every day so he has like a clear path forward from the day he gets his day started off with the right mindset and that dude was all about mindset yeah Mama mindset you know that dude is like the that was he was the embodiment of hard work and discipline you know and an accomplishment and that was his way of starting out every day yeah that's I think yeah I think also it gives me something I kind of look forward to it a little bit the more I do it I look forward to that time that I spend but I'll leave those earplugs in man until I have to take them out until like something comes along do you live in a noisy place um I live in sometimes a place that has some noise because you you live in an apartment or a house yeah and I I have a house in Nashville but I have an apartment still my old apartment in Los Angeles yeah it's a little noisy yeah Ellie's noisy you can always hear something you can hear somebody how long are you going how often do you go back to L.A like four months out of the year to get sad let me think what I get there's things that I miss you know I miss at the storm miss seeing like Coco Diaz you know yeah a store yeah you would walk up on him and his eyes light up you know that's what I love about the the club that we have that sign that says Get It Together [ __ ] yeah it's fine it's Joey yeah oh that's who says that yeah Joey used to always say that to us he was so happy when he saw that oh that's cool dude oh that's awesome because that was like his thing yeah you were about to go on stage he's firing you up like get it together [ __ ] let's go Rock these [ __ ] oh yeah there's something about yeah that like bro he came into town and murdered he did he murdered he only want to do one side he was supposed to do two shows he's so funny man he's like a reluctant killer because he hasn't been doing that much stand up you know because he's living in New Jersey and uh it was a seven o'clock show he goes I'll do the ten I'll do the 10. I can get the [ __ ] out of here you're here man I go go up go up and he went up and [ __ ] lit those people on fire the pop that he got it was just like the pop that you got but even maybe even a little crazier the pop when Joey got on stage they were like oh wow because he's only been there once oh it's like seeing Santa yeah that's how they did with Chappelle too when I brought your bell up at the club the first time they went [ __ ] ape [ __ ] they couldn't believe it how is Dave Chappelle here how is this real oh dude I remember watching Joey Diaz he's the I would find myself get when he would when his music would come on [Music] yeah yeah whenever that would come on I would literally without even doing it I would be out of my seat yeah I would be so excited he's the most watched comic by other Comics hmm interesting I would imagine don't you think like if you knew that Joey was going up in the OR you'd go and have a seat in the back always yeah because you're going to see something you know some crazy shit's gonna happen yeah he's all fired up he's gonna say the words we're not supposed to say he's on 500 milligrams of edibles when he one time I went over there and it was him and Lee Syed you know when he's got Lee over there like and he would just like lease on like 75 the flying Jew he turned lisaiah into a [ __ ] total edible head oh dude Lee was a [ __ ] he was falling asleep while he's producing this of it of him producing the show he's producing Joey shows bro well here's without cold because whatever one time I get there and I was like hey I think I hear a little whistling in the headphones and Lee's like I don't want to try and figure it out so Lee's like trying to figure out by the end he's eating so many Edibles Lee was literally sitting there he's like it was him it was him in the beginning it have we manifested our own destiny bro [Music] what you got a video of him falling asleep [Music] you saw the devil shake shake them up shake them up at least I admit the devil right right yeah bro he tortured people dude one time we were schizophrenic breaks we did some LSD right we're children right and so we went to the um Waffle House because it was open you know like when you were on drugs you were a kid you basically like that's the downside of having any place that stays open all night it's like people are gonna come there they're all on drugs no one's over at Waffle House right so we get there dude and uh and we're in there and my buddy starts laughing so hard he's like uh kind of convulsing a little bit my buddy Scott and the waiter was a black gentleman and a gay guy and we never seen a gay black dude right so anyway he starts doing the Heimlich maneuver on my buddy right and he wasn't choking he was just losing his [ __ ] because he was so [ __ ] geeked up on LSD right did you tell him he wasn't joking I couldn't speak I was laughing so [ __ ] hard hahaha it was Unreal how did he did he figure out that your buddy I think I disappeared and just woke up into sixth grade but man I just we laughed so [ __ ] hardly these guys tried to give you a heimlich oh my God that was so much fun doing drugs when you didn't know what was gonna happen um it was scary but it was exciting you know Jimmy did you put another one of these down because I threw the other one there was a I asked to find another one out there and apparently that has some power in it but I don't know it's not it's not new I know that give it a whiff do you have a beverage on this game that I can have would you like uh throw that away too then I want that hard hitter baby I want something that's gonna [ __ ] teach me oh that's the one that's the what there's coffee on the table if you want some coffee you want to kill clip I just want something yeah you want to kill cliff yes can we get a couple of kill ghosts yeah man huh um and it was so cool to see Ron why didn't talk to him last night bro I walk in yeah he's in there Tom segura's in there I put a lid on that I felt like I'm gonna have one more God it's you know I'm an addict because I know I look forward to this I look forward to it too yeah I mean a little bit probably I'm a functional addict or something yeah like if you're an added dude you've redesigned it because you're doing good at it I feel like it can be done certain addictions that could be managed yeah you've had one of these right yeah they're great yeah this is my own oh yeah you got your own so does Israel a lot of Sonya blaming Joe yeah Israel arasania has a kiwi one yeah it's nice I talked to this guy one time on the phone a really nice guy oh he's the best John's the best and we got a a new one coming out with a compilation uh collaboration with me and cam Hines it's a nice spicy Cherry called elk blood oh nice boy it's good dude we went through like I had to go through like seven or eight versions to get to this this is perfect which I think is like the perfect flavor this one is a um pineapple like a spicy pineapple it's like pineapple with a little bit of Jalapeno in there it's a very addictive drink yeah I like having me a little something I didn't have any caffeine all day today because I wanted to wait till I had some in here mmm you know you manage that yep I was like I'm waiting till I get in there and it's gonna be exciting yeah I'm gonna have it when I get in there what's the most time you've ever spent off a caffeine 30 I would say 30 days I had Michael pollen on and he was explaining how he took I think he took like three months is that what he said something like that three months off of caffeine and he said when he had it he was like it was like a psychedelic experience wow he's like it's so different when your body's not accustomed to caffeine and you have it it's like you have this insane feeling of bliss it's like it's really wild yeah well we were doing that uh remember I used to do those Vapes remember and right now me too too addictive and I didn't like it yeah and it made me tired like I was tired oh I'd have a couple weights yeah and you start to shut up yeah but the first hit is Magic the first hit I'd take a big profit and be like uh like everything just washes over you feel so relaxed yeah it's brain cells dying um it's getting stupid or where everything's gonna be okay because I feel like the more smart you are the more you take into account all the possibilities and all the variables and all things can go wrong but one hit of that vape and you're like this yeah oh yeah but then I was always chasing that Dragon yep and then later on the night I noticed I'd be hitting it and nothing would happen I'd be like what what am I doing here yeah I couldn't I think we did Esco bars or whatever oh and then one time I went into a place and ladies like this is the strongest one they got this [ __ ] is the strongest she's like every hit is like smoking five cigarettes and then she would [ __ ] hit it and no joke her hair would curl dude Smoke's coming out of her ears he's been like hitting five I'll take a wrench I didn't [ __ ] hit that [ __ ] boy yeah I have a [ __ ] with the Vapes in quite a while but uh our friends still hit him all the time and you see like oh I see that I see that little demon that's in your body I'm about six days off right now and I'm really battling yeah oh you're battling still yeah I don't want to see somebody with one that's the tough moment for me yeah you just want to grab it give me a hit of that yeah so last time I didn't see anybody with one I took a couple puffs off a cigarette though I hadn't had that in a few years that was fun what made you uh quit The Vape I didn't it keeps me up it keeps me just rattling you know like everything nicotine you ever think your car is still going and you push it and it's off right like that yeah you just up yeah my thing's still going and it was late and you're up oh yeah yeah now I'm [ __ ] up dude it's also like it can't be good for you all that oil you that mist and you would eat like sometimes you feel it in your throat yeah throat would get all dry and [ __ ] up because it's irritated from all the oil like what is in there like what's Google escobars like what are the ingredients like what's what's the oil they use I mean [ __ ] is good though now if you're running across the border if you are doing long like if you are long distance cycling or something I think have one on you propene glycol a vegetable glycerin natural and artificial flavors and nicotine all right but what is that is that bad for you that gotta be bad for you is the additive safe it's a synthetic food additive that belongs to the same chemical group as alcohol it's colorless odorless slightly syrupy generally recognized as safe by the U.S Food and Drug Administration yeah yeah I don't believe those people though FDA could they're all in cahoots FDA considers the average daily dietary intake of 23 milligrams per kilogram of body weight to be safe for persons 2 to 65 years of age maybe but what about vaping it Google vaping is vaping propane that even was from 2008 and I don't think that existed then oh vaping didn't exist then in 2008 do you remember people doing it back then I don't think so I remember they had those little brick Vapes I used to Huff gas and stuff but that was different see if you can Google uh propene glycol safe um is propane glycol safe for safe for Vaping oh I'll tell you what's not safe is doing uh you get the right hand sanitizer and you do a couple Huffs on that [ __ ] you have a hand sanitizer yeah the good stuff scroll back up to the top what does it say at the top both propane glycol and vegetable glycerin are considered safe to use in vaping products but some users may find one or the other preferable due to personal preference considering this website a pod salt yeah if I wasn't even going what is that what is it okay I was trying to find something that seemed vaping it may as it lead to lung inflammation oh yeah click that pay attention eyes and throat well definitely throat it definitely irritates your throat did you find it irritated your throat yeah sometimes yeah vaping propylene glycol and vegetable glycerin may lead to lung inflammation but the thing is it's like how much are you doing that's the thing with all these like do you know those uh what are those called feel free those little Kava and um Kratom drinks there's a lawsuit about them now do you know what those are Ron White brought a bunch into the club those things not those four Locos huh no no no no no it's a tiny little drink like a tonic and it has Cava and uh also kratomy oh I saw him with that last night yeah yeah boy you I don't know what's going on with those things what that does but you drink a half of one of those you're not supposed to drink a full one supposed to drink a halfway why don't they make it in smaller dosage so it's a single serving because it's only that big yeah because it's hard to judge also I can't read without my glasses on like that little tiny writing I'm not going to read this is two servings you know like when you get like a Monster energy drink or something like that yeah I'm having it all two servings [ __ ] off yeah dude yeah I'm having [ __ ] boats is it one can then it's one serving yeah I'm not sharing this what the [ __ ] is wrong with you so if you give me whatever it's gonna [ __ ] share this all right Google yeah what are you doing you're gonna put a little cup on top of the [ __ ] pour a body song there was only one for the two of us both thirsty he's doing that very very rarely but it wasn't for a specific brand name I'm seeing some interesting maybe if you're like a tea or something delivery thing I just typed in Cava Kratom drink yeah but just Google live free because this one very specific what what I'm bringing up is there's a lawsuit because this one dude they were getting him at 7-Eleven and a bunch of different places and this one dude was an alcoholic and a drug addict I guess and he was clean and sober and started drinking these things and went off the deep end and he was drinking 10 a day which is crazy that's 20 doses a day you're not supposed to have more than two in a day two doses we mean one bottle that's more than you're supposed to have in an entire day damn this dude was down in 10 a day oh my God so he was going against any guidelines that they had yes that's exactly what it looks like so what I'm not a lawsuits it's not Kratom is not listed on it but what they've found I guess it is here but what they found it wasn't I guess maybe it wasn't being sold that way it was being sold as a kava drink that had created a minute and people didn't know had kratom in it yeah well I've read varying accounts as to how much Kratom is in it I don't think Kratom is necessarily dangerous but I do know that some people abuse it for sure recovering alcoholics sues Wellness drink firm for getting him hooked on 10 of its feel free kava drinks a day that left him hospitalized because they contain addictive morphine like substance Kratom wow 10 of 10 Diet Cokes is a lot but whose fault is the guy the guy I mean who's his fault yeah it's his fault like it's his fault 10 days is his fault but the thing is I think what he's saying is they didn't say there was crate a minute oh totally this it doesn't say I don't even think it says on the website the kratom's in it I'm pretty sure I Googled the website go Google the live free website and see if it even says Kratom on the website and a lot of the Chinese I think are hopped up on this right are they I think so I know a lot of addicts like it Kratom I believe is a uh it's popular in a lot of um in the Far East well it's pretty popular everywhere so here's let's see what it says is in there so this is the stuff what does it say is in there does it give you a list of ingredients classic tonic feel free time this one says kratom's in it right there okay that's the classic and then there's another one Cava coconut lion's mane oh so there's a feel free tonic and then there's the classic tonic so the classic tonic is the one that we got so what does it say in there what does it say the ingredients are foreign I'd rather magic mind if you had that yeah that's a mushroom um yeah it's like a pretty good it's it's a nootropic it has lion's mane is good lion's mane is good for cognitive function but when it comes to uh actual nootropics that help okay here it goes kava Kratom so the Kratom total alcohol alkaloid so it's mostly Cava and a little bit of Kratom it's in 34 milligrams hmm I heard a joke one time this guy this is the worst joke I've ever heard you want to hear it I would love to this guy goes hey you know why you should take Cava what because wow pretty bad huh did you keep hanging out with that dude I never I just remember that yeah that's a dumb one but those drinks whoo those put you in a nice place whatever the [ __ ] is in there but like I knew a dude um well what do you mean the feel freeze yeah see I didn't have one man I'm trying to think of what I had mostly I do Diet Coke yeah those frail freezer basically a drug so you you do you recommend it you think maybe I'll try one or no I don't know everybody in the the club is a little wary of them some of the guys have read the class action lawsuit but sometimes you gotta go into those things and find out what what is really going on with these you know like when you find out the guy was taking 10 a day and then also you find out the guy was an addict and you go well what kind of money like how far gone what was he a guy who had disappeared for three months and came back with bloody face and right you know like who knows yeah we had a roommate that uh used to eat all these breath mints you know and he would stack like those Altoids you get a big stack of them and he would always kind of show off how many he could stack in between his teeth you know and then but he would go out and get drunk at night and come in the morning he'd be like on the sofa it's like in a bloody suit like he'd be in a suit but just [ __ ] oh dude he looked like a reservoir dog some people live in alternative realities occasionally they just like they get [ __ ] up and then they go away and then they come back and they have to piece together what the [ __ ] happened to them one shoe on [ __ ] up knee what's wrong with my hand how come I can't hear it's like some people just go so hard god dude I'm almost do you get jealous of those people sometimes I'm sometimes I'm jealous of those people look at this kava does kava feel like Xanax he's found that kava significant relieves significantly relieves anxiety with mild to no side effects several studies have found that kava extract is comparable to antidepressants and benzodiazepines yeah but doesn't cop that's Dave asprey though doesn't kava also uh cause uh liver problems see Google that does kava negatively affect your liver because I think kava has an effect especially at high doses that is similar to alcohol more than 100 cases of liver toxicity related to the use of Cava have been identified some leading to liver transplant and some leading to death as people have died from Cava um people die from ice cream too there are many reasons for liver damage for one kava depletes glutathione ion a chief antioxidant within the liver oh interesting but I wonder if you like take it with glutathione Cava bars in Austin I just found out interesting we should do a field trip huh go to the kava bars whatever's in that feel free is like whoa that's a nice feeling I'm gonna have to try a little bit tonight I think yeah I was just a little wary of it when everybody at the club got nervous so I had to start doing a deep dive like what's in it what's what are people worried about what's this lawsuit what's the class action lawsuit how do you feel when you drink it very loud relax I just want to start dancing yeah I like it I don't think it's bad I don't feel I always just judge like how do I feel how do I feel after yeah and after I feel fine I feel fine like there was no hangover like I just met many times where I feel good because I had a few Tequilas and then and then get up in the morning I'm like oh you [ __ ] idiot you know like a little bit of a headache dragging my ass and then I get in the cold plunge and it just feel like an idiot it's hard to get back to back to even yeah it's hard to get back to even oh good I used to sometimes I would do so much cocaine my freaking eyes would dry out and uh look at your grinding you're thinking about it oh dude yeah I remember I had to lick my hands and then rub it into my eyes whoa so that I could even blink well Jesus I always get dehydrated boy deep you go deep huh oh dude are you that dude you go deep with whatever the [ __ ] you're doing I like to get right on the [ __ ] and I like to be a peeping Tom if I can I'll watch your whole family eat dinner I used to love that [ __ ] on coke huh on coke on anything boy I [ __ ] love to watch a family eat from the distance the audio of you and I talking about how addictive Vapes are that has been used on so many different Tech talk videos and and reels how addictive are those things I didn't want to give her too far but you were just have you ever heard of this thing called frogging spelled with a pH no no have you heard it what's up it's a thing so it's a it's like an online community there's probably a website people try to live in your house without you knowing about it or like an extended period oh that's a good way to die I guarantee that doesn't take place much in Texas I think that's a San Francisco game right there I don't I don't buy that dude one time um I had a babysitter and they had they found a guy under their bed in their house and what a scary thing oh my God she came up the stairs and uh she could see under the bed because the bedroom door was open when she walked up the stairs and she saw a guy under there oh Jesus what did they do and then called the police and he was mentally unwell so they had to duh yeah it's not a lot of dudes to really have their [ __ ] together they're hiding under kids beds hey can you keep it down I got to be up I got to be at work mentally as well let's not get Hasty here let's not label the guy yeah yeah he was doing a little bit of frogging whatever whatever but I love how we're in a space now Joe where people breaking and living in people's houses is just like a new town as I'm learning into an article about it this makes a whole lot of sense because I've lived in a place where it's explaining it says it happened at Ohio State so there's giant houses where 14 people are living together in and out all day long and someone can like sneak into a room and you just think it's a friend if you saw him in the hallway baby oh that's a little bit different slightly different thing I'm not breaking it now why do they name it frogging that yeah so it's not a guy eating flies and stuff and hiding in your wall because they go from place to place it's sometimes it's uh oh okay I can do it yeah as much as they can sort of victims often sense something is amiss but easily doubt themselves and hesitate to seek help yeah I don't know at least at first not me bro I'll be clear in that house locked and loaded I probably have a vest on I'll probably [ __ ] velcro a vest on and go clear that [ __ ] house I would just ask everybody if they live there or not how do you not know if somebody lives with you because they're sneaking around they don't they're not they're like sleeping in closets and [ __ ] [ __ ] up all day they're 20 year old kids they're done yeah oh yeah yeah I'm talking about like a regular house like your house yeah if somebody was sleeping I did think it was somebody in the attic for a while because I would hear things sometimes like little settling but I went up there and there's nothing probably rats yeah it could have been yeah I'm trying to think of what else has been going on the other thing I saw last night at the American Gladiators documentary started on ESPN yeah have you seen any of it or anything well dude I was around when American Gladiators was huge so this is the guy that created it or is founded the documentary is very interesting because this guy who is uh credited as the Creator I think he's not very forthcoming and honest with everything and he won't answer the guy's questions a lot which is kind of strange so he made a good documentary about it and not all the Gladiators would come talk about it he's very uh open about the like I didn't pay them and if they wanted to leave go ahead and leave wow what the American Gladiators didn't get paid they were making 25 000 for 52 episodes they said what yeah two shows a day something that's what they get into and this is like how big the marketing got there was 13 million viewers I think at one point per show so he crushed it with all the he made it and he paid them nothing nothing piece of [ __ ] they were getting hurt really bad one of the guys was a big one to show how bad he is right now he's walking around he can't feel half of his limbs 700 discs oh my God remember they have the names like it was like Fierce yeah River yeah the Ice Cube yeah thunder thunder now it's like uh Barnacle lethargy like they're all [ __ ] in wheelchairs didn't they bring American Gladiators back at one point I'm taking it back but the thing I find interesting about this guy is he started off his career as an Elvis impersonator which is why he looks a little bit like Elvis that dude doesn't look anything like that could have been part of it he could be putting on about how much he got been burning it's very it's a very interesting documentary I'll just say that oh you mean like he might have been lying about how much money he made he's lying about a lot of stuff and the guy the guy who's making it asked him you can hear him asking him he's like he just sort of stops like I'm not going to talk about that he looks like a low-level MMA promoter um he looks like one of those guys our guys could take on the UFC's best Champions any day of the week yeah he's one of those guys that's what he looks like yeah that guy definitely looks maybe a little bit um like a sneaky guy oh he definitely looks sneaky I'm trying to think of the first sneaky guy I ever met first sneaky guy you ever met yeah you really can go back that far oh yeah when you met somebody in like God or sneaky sneaky well you mean it's such a unique comedy business club owner business you've been ripped off by club dude there was a club where I felt bad that people didn't come and they I was like you guys can pay me and they paid me less I remember because no one was there um he said they could yeah that's not a robbery that's a deal yeah yeah you're right I made a deal you were a nice guy you're trying to help out the club and you felt bad that you made a bad deal get another hit for that yeah feel better oh Jesus you went in deep you got your nostrils right up to the give me that I like that I don't want you to be out there on your own oh yeah that's what I'm talking about a hunting we will go uh hunting you want some of this Jamie you remember oh that's all you need yeah yeah I don't I I can't remember I just did it 10 seconds oh dude you sound like a guy crying in the 40s oh my god dude do you ever do you think like do you ever think like the do you think remember we were talking about like frequencies like there could be other ways to evaluate what's going on with us do you think we'll ever get like new ways to look at ours like to quantify ourselves and how we're feeling and stuff yeah yeah I think so with science yeah I think with new innovation and Technology they'll probably develop ways to recognize the amount of energy that your body has you know because like some people are just they have energy like what is that like I always think of that like I switched back to uh the carnivore diet you know um I go back and forth on that and for the most part I eat mostly meat and fruit and some vegetables that's like most of my diet occasionally I go crazy like we were in the Bronx we went to this Italian deli and these giant sandwiches is amazing but that's a rare deviation oh yeah but I had this moment um I guess it was about two weeks ago where I was like you know what um the best I ever felt like literally the best I ever felt all throughout the day was when I was on the carnivore diet let me go back to that let me see what that's like and one of the things that I saw like immediately for seven eight days I ate nothing but meat and eggs and fat and bacon and nothing else I mean nothing I was real strict and my brain was working so much better it was weird like I wasn't searching for like it was like I had more access to my ability to form sentences to I was thinking clear it was like it was more effortless to have conversations and I was like this is interesting this is very interesting because this is not how I normally feel this is like me at my Optimum but I'm able to sustain this multiple days in a row and I think that a lot of the foods that we eat yeah foods that have preservatives a lot of bread and [ __ ] and just shitty food your body uses so much resources to process that and it's not real food it's kind of bad for you right and so your body is just like overburdened with this extra work when you eat clean like really I mean you know Wild game and fat and beef Tallow and all that and eggs your body doesn't have any [ __ ] to process so your body is less inflament you have less inflammation and you're operating off of ketones essentially for the most part because your your body is entering into a ketogenic State you have just just it's you just feel like even through the whole day and I never felt like a like at the end of the day like oh boy I'm tired there was none of that there's just so that's mostly on the keto diet well it's Carnival carnivore diet but but carnivore you you must reach periods of ketosis there's a process called of gluconeogenesis I believe it is see if that's correct and I think that what that is is when your body consumes only protein your body will convert some of that protein into glucose and that actually can knock you out of a ketogenic state if you eat too much protein but but when you eat like that I mean everybody's different clearly I know people that function very well on a vegetarian diet yeah not for me dude yeah gluconeogenesis take you out of ketosis a widespread fear surrounding keto is that consuming too much protein may lead to the upregulation of a process called gluconeogenesis and throw you out of ketosis undoing all your hard work the truth is gluconeogenesis is essential for our overall health and actually allows us to remain in ketosis oh okay so it's good so whatever that is that's how I function at my best so that's how I eat now like last night when Dave brought the pizza backstage it looked good what'd you do I wanted a piece I was like I'm not eating it did you leave the room or anything or what were some of your methods you used to stay away from it I don't really I don't have to do that I just go no just not eating it did you do a gum or anything to keep yourself busy no no no no it wasn't even itchy I wasn't itchy you know if I had a couple of cocktails I mean I'll probably would have grabbed a slice oh [ __ ] yeah boy that's the problem a couple of car a couple of Tequilas oh yeah next thing you know I want some pizza oh dude I'll [ __ ] yeah I'll do whatever after that but I think I'm tequila I think I'm done I I lost five pounds in two weeks and not not anything but fat just like just immediately my bodies were shriveled up do you have some fitness goals like at this point in your life you've kind of been through Fitness a lot it's been a big part of your life do some of your fitness goals kind of change as you as we get a little bit older do you think not for me no no because with uh hormone replacement and all the stuff that I do even at 55 my body functions essentially the same way I did when I was 30. and I'm not exaggerating like I have no problem doing hard workouts at kettlebells heavy bag workouts Jiu Jitsu injuries are an issue you know with me like I just tweaked my back muscle the other day doing some dead lifts but nothing serious but um but as far as like gold fitness goals is just to maintain this yeah I know I have a extraordinary level of Fitness for my age and I just maintain that and I think that if you can maintain it that's the key the real problem with people is they get out of shape and then getting back in shape is very hard it's a [ __ ] grind yeah it's a grind and for me for my mental health man I am not the same person if I don't exercise you know that whole thing with 100 the frequencies my my I'm at my best as a human being as a friend as a husband as a father as a comedian as a podcast host as a just as a neighbor as a general person I'm at my best if I work out yeah 100 of the time I'm I'm less anxious I don't have any demons everything's good I exercise it all out it's just like it's like a purge that I have to do I have to do that Purge and if I don't I don't I don't [ __ ] I don't get that out and then I'm I have all this extra like ah all this extra unnecessary angst and weirdness and I think that's most people man I mean when I go like I've been injured before where I couldn't do anything for like a week or two and you start getting depressed you start feeling like [ __ ] you start feeling real dull and sad and like it's not and and I think that is a lot of people out there that suffer from depression in fact they say that exercise is one and a half times more effective than ssris for curing depression oh in a heartbeat man I'll tell if I take my because I take ssris and I do exercise if I take my SSRI I don't feel really anything I just feel like oh I took my SSRI but if I go for a run like even today I had to go run a couple miles I was like I know I'm gonna be on here I want to have I want to like just be in like my I want to have my good energy going I'm gonna go for a run you know and so yeah I think it I know that it makes me feel better if I do something athletic you know what SSR are you taking I think I'm on Lexapro right now I take the generic one whatever the cheaper one is you know I think it's um I don't know what it is but it is they say it's fine you know so I don't know if I believe them but I mean I'm [ __ ] taking it now I would like to tell I would like to maybe take 30 days off and try Ayahuasca again um I feel like I'm getting back around where I would like to do it again you know yeah yeah I would man because I want to [ __ ] feel I want to be right up there on Nature's [ __ ] I want to be in there eavesdropping on Nature's nuts boy I think yeah good I'll be right up there yeah would you say boy eavesdropping on nature right up next to it oh dude yelling oh Ayahuasca dude you'll [ __ ] Mother Nature you'll be she'll break out that wiener and you'll be like damn I didn't know Mother Nature had a weiner you know other Nature's got everything it's powerful dude that Ayahuasca stuff is real powerful so I would like to do that again dude what is what is the reason why you take the ssris I think because when I'm off of them something feels wrong I feel it's a battle a battle it's a battle to even if I do running and I do Fitness right it's a battle to keep myself even so instead of dealing with that at a more intense level I choose to take them because it just makes it a little bit easier I don't think it's taking the easy way out though because if I don't take them and I still do all those things it's hard for me to get to a good Baseline what do you mean by wrong like when you say you feel wrong what does it feel like I feel like at any moment kind of my feelings can just drop off into like a really surprised low hmm out of nowhere for no reason yes sometimes with a little bit of motivation to it right or some trigger but it'll make the level that it drops off to it's too much of a drop for me to not get some help if we're a little bit and it felt manageable that's okay but when it's pretty steep it's like oh man this feels sometimes scary yeah I know what you're saying um but it's gotten doing that Ayahuasca stuff made it a lot better than it had ever been Neil um Brennan said it basically cured him yeah he's the one who took me to it yeah he said um it made him much happier it cured him of like a lot of his what he felt like were personality disorders that he had you know like Neil's a Neil's a great guy be very very smart very smart and sometimes you know I wonder about real smart guys they're just always thinking about things and maybe too much about certain things and you know you just get overwhelmed by thoughts and anxiety and emotions and and anxiety is a lot of what anxiety a lot of is fretting about possibilities for a lot of people you know it's the inability to live in the moment and you forgot about anxiety and a lot of it has to do with childhood trauma a lot of it has to do with genetics a lot of anxiety is a weird thing like they think that anxiety whether it's a learned behavior or not you can actually get it from your parents I don't know why see what's it I could see that can you get anxiety is anxiety genetic Google that my mom made us anxious yeah yeah dude sometimes Mama we go get ice cream dude and she would like she's like if she'd get angry if we she'd get so angry if we dripped any of it here it goes there's clear research showing that anxiety is influenced by genetics in fact experts notice a family connection for anxiety even before they understood how DNA or genes worked if you have a close relative with anxiety your chance of developing is about two to six times higher than if you don't well I don't know if that's genetic or if it's just like it's Behavior yeah if your mom is always or your dad is always like Bob they're [ __ ] anxious and you're right if they come over and they're always [ __ ] tickling you then you're gonna [ __ ] feel tickled all this if you're always getting [ __ ] with yeah yeah something you know bug in your or something even just tickling you with their words yeah genetics of generalized anxiety disorder and related traits well for sure mental illness is uh genetic there's a lot of people that are mentally ill and their children are mentally ill or their families mentally ill or you know it's like it's man I I used to have a much more um ignorant view on mental health because I have my own mental health issues which I'm sure we all do but mine was like just don't be a [ __ ] get your work done you feel great and I don't have to take anything and even though I don't have to take anything I'm still doing something to mitigate it I'm doing something every day to work on it and when I don't I do feel it right like a lot of people do so I always wonder maybe those people just aren't doing the work maybe if they just got up in the morning went running before work or did something before maybe they could get through this and not need a [ __ ] pill yeah I don't think that anymore interesting yeah I think it's I think yeah there's times where I thought that I'm just not Tough Enough I'm just not yeah doing enough I'm not I'm not enough to battle this right right and um and then I get to a point where so many times I tried to stop taking it it's like it's too much of a discrepancy that makes things unmanageable to a point where it feels like it's unfair to be that unmanageable to myself so um I get back on it you know and and I don't think it really bothers me or anything like that but yeah it's kind of the same with alcoholism like I thought alcoholism used to just be like somebody drunk couldn't stop drinking or whatever right but there's so much more I mean alcoholism is the only disease it will tell you you don't have the disease right that's correct like imagine if you put on like a shirt right but every every couple days a shirt was like guess what you don't have a shirt on good analogy I don't know if it is but it seems like it but that's what alcoholic because alcoholism would tell you you don't have a problem right you don't have a problem have another drink yeah relax have another cut have haven't have some more coke um yeah have another family Brian Simpson was telling us he went through a brief period of time where he was doing a lot of Adderall and he said I eat like a week he said he did a week of Adderall and he said man it's like that [ __ ] that [ __ ] pulls you in really oh yeah yeah he's like that [ __ ] pulls you in he goes it makes you focused he told his [ __ ] hilarious story about he went to jerk off and uh he had 90 tabs open and he was he was looking at porn for five hours because he couldn't pick one that he liked the best is so [ __ ] funny that's like he's so [ __ ] funny oh yeah he's great he is so funny his way of looking at things is so interesting because he's he's so thoughtful like when he thinks about things he's we like he never comes up with a half ass take on things his take on things is like he's been thinking about it for a long time before he brings it up you know yeah I like listening to him there's something really unique about him very unique comedy style too relaxed and you know and punch lines are crisp yeah I love a crisp punch line yeah you're pretty you're like you stay in like kind of like uh you like to have things kind of organized yeah well like that's the best it's you also have the disorganized mom moments you know where you're [ __ ] around like if I have new bits there's a lot of disorganized moments yeah I was watching you perform last night it was cool thank you yeah so I mean saliva was a new stuff that I hadn't heard and um yeah I got about a half hour of new [ __ ] it was uh yeah there was a couple things I was laughing at man it was fun God it was so much fun over there God it's so fun right I can't believe you have your own club doesn't it feel like it's been open forever though isn't that feel is it feels weird in there well I think some of it because it's been such a journey for you that other people have kind of been on with you in a way yeah well also all these guys who had faith in me yeah who moved out here and moved out here when I didn't even have a club yet and we were all just operating out of the Vulcan but the shows of the Vulcan were so fun people like man I think I believe him yeah that's us last night come on look at that picture come on Louis Dave Tom Ron me Ian Ian Theo [ __ ] Vaughn a song Derek come on man wow that was a great night what a show too what a [ __ ] show I know dude I can't believe we get to do this for our job there you are there you go yeah man it's the greatest job in the history of the world David for us look at Dom up there killing it dude Ron look at him huh murdering murdering I retired [ __ ] you ain't retired you've been at my club four days a week shut the [ __ ] up he had a retirement party I'm like I am not going to your [ __ ] crazy he had a retirement party I'm like I am not going to your [ __ ] fugazi retirement party I know you Ron White you're too goddamn good he's too goddamn good that guy's never gonna quit doing comedy he's too good he's too even just listening to him is fun and he comes from a time he has a time period trapped in him that is on a lot of people don't have it he's got that rural Texas like a way and a look at the world that you have to have that voice still out there yeah you know you have to well he's a he's a real legend oh and having him around the club all the time it's like it's it's so morale boosting for everything I saw this video give me some of this yeah you know I was amazed by this uh 21 of us took us down there uh remember we had six ice chests full of beer we floated down that River drinking beer for six and a half hours not one person had to pee [Applause] now I find that to be remarkable bladder control I'd like to think my friends wouldn't pee on themselves I know I would that was the best thing about tubing River you could just paddle up to somebody you don't even know oh that is pretty true dude just peeing right next to somebody there's nothing look at it back then wow look at it back there with the long hair it was like a hippie bro the early 90s wow there's nothing better than being in a um pool talking to somebody and peeing at the same time I can't Point there's a lot of things better than that yeah you're right you're right you're right there's a lot of things going on I mean it's not even in the top thousand out of all the good things the smell of fresh baked bread is better than that all right baby dude without even eating it I mean yeah if you got a [ __ ] kitchen or whatever yeah but still I'm saying if you're really just out in the elements dude being Point Blank Range urinating in somebody else's space that doesn't know it do anything good for I feel like a terrible person for pissing on somebody yeah you're right come on man yeah yeah why out there peeing on people we're better than that we're better than that yeah we are come on man yeah you're right we're better than that you're right I'm not gonna I'm not gonna let that affect me you excited about tonight yeah let's [ __ ] go yeah I'm excited dude I get excited every time I go there you do oh yeah I can't believe it's real still can't believe it's real yeah when I walk in I can't believe it's real say hi to everybody can't believe it's real all these people are working staff I know hi how's everybody doing I can't believe it's real they're like okay go upstairs all Comics are there hanging out it's a party every night it's like the best night of your life every night it's like what we have at the store better it really is it's crazy it's the the environment is and it's so perfectly set up for stand up and the audiences are so hyped I mean you get there at 9 30. there's a [ __ ] line around the block waiting to get on that 10 o'clock show it's nuts it is exciting man I mean even just seeing people excited to be at a club again is exciting you know yeah well this this town has really embraced it you know like because it was a long time that I was you know us moving here was a big deal with a lot of Articles written like this stand-up comedy has moved to Austin and then when I said I was going to open up a club there was like a lot of hype about that and it it was almost better that the first place didn't work out because it took so long before this we bought the second place and then started construction it was a whole year process after that it was a lot going on it's like a year and a half of just straight Construction um did you feel at some point like was there ever a point where you're like I don't know if this is gonna work out but I've already said it's going to so I have to do it no no because uh fortunately I had the resources yeah it wasn't it wasn't like if I was stressed out financially and it was like I was like cutting it close that would have been a that would have been a different experience yeah this experience was like what do we got to do okay let's do that uh what's the best thing to do do that you know like when Louie came Louis uh Louis CK came and I showed him the club and he [ __ ] loved it but he gave me all these good suggestions one of the things he said the the stage in the small room was too big and it was like you're right he's like yeah she cut it down four feet on each side so I got the construction guys over here before we poured the cement so all the rebar was cut the metal was in place and I was like let's make it smaller cut it here and cut it there and they're like well it's gonna take more time like yeah but we got to do it right let's do it right lower the ceiling shrink the stage lower the ceiling in the big room sound deadening everywhere because like a lot of comics like they like echo in a comedy club because it makes the laughs louder but it also makes it harder to hear what the person's saying because all the sounds are bouncing around yeah I don't like that I like it with carpet or you know like yeah as much can it can be absorbed that's what you want yeah what we got now is perfect yeah Louie's awesome man Louie Louie came on my podcast and we had one of the best chats I've ever had with somebody you told me the the YouTube removed your RFK podcast yeah what happened they um yeah they said some of the clips were in violation of their uh medical policies or like um like stuff that goes against the who right do you know that North Korea just joined the who North Korea as like an executive position on the board of the who see what that is which is insane yeah this is literally a country that starves our citizens and the who is allowing them I mean it's just what what is the who what the [ __ ] you tell me that Robert Robert Kennedy Jr is lying because I bet he's not yeah I bet everything he said it's true I bet every everything he said could be backed up by by data well I mean one thing that I love about Bobby or Robert Kennedy um he's a friend of mine and I've always really he's an environmentalist right and so he's always started he was an environmental environmentalist so it makes sense that he would care about the environment inside of our bodies as well right um like he has this River Keepers organization they're just about keeping the waters clean and his whole life has been about that kind of stuff so I don't know I found it just like yeah if somebody wants to object to the status quo or raise their hand and ask questions that makes perfect sense to me and then also he's not like an anti-vaxxer but he's about like vaccine efficacy right which means I think like it's about honest vaccine efficacy like what is the what's the real data versus what are they selling you because if you look at the coveted vaccine for example they sold us something that wasn't accurate they said that it was going to stop transmission they said that it was going to stop infection it did neither of those yeah they also said that it was going to offer long lasting protection it did not it just didn't and they said it was safe and effective it's how can they know that it's a new product and you're administering it to 100 hundreds of millions of people without a lengthy trial period like they do with every other drug yeah so all these people were like wanting it to be effective so they were doing the work of the pharmaceutical companies which they've never done before no one has ever like said you've got to trust these people that have the biggest [ __ ] criminal fines in U.S history these people that have been lying to us left and right these people that have they've been tried and convicted for lying about the side effects for lying about the efficacy whether or not something is addictive we know that with the opioid crisis oh yeah you watch dope sick for I mean that's unbelievable you get involved it's unbelievable what's happened with all of that yeah this is and the Sackler uh family just got they just they had to give I think it was like a large payment I think it was like six or eight billion dollars and that uh gives them immunity that was very recent see if you can find that but that's [ __ ] nothing Sackler family wins immunity from opioid lawsuits which is [ __ ] wild unreal 6 billion so what about all the people that [ __ ] die what about all the [ __ ] kids that overdose what about all the the families who had a child who sprained their [ __ ] ankle right and lost her and two years later lost their kid to addiction yeah because this company uh didn't care and because the FDA was compromisable I'm sorry man that [ __ ] [ __ ] makes me I think these people should be [ __ ] hunged it's evil and they lie evil that's what it is they absolutely lied about whether or not it was addiction addictive in exchange they will pay 6 billion to help address opioid addiction what does that even what does that mean what does that mean how are you gonna address it hey guys uh opioids are addictive who knows yeah yeah man will be spread over multiple years but look at how much they made see the the thing is they've they're collectively worth 11 billion and they had to give up six so how much money did they make off of opiates I mean see that's the thing that happened with um uh vioxx with vioxx they got in trouble what is it vioxx is an anti-inflammatory that didn't particularly work very well and also killed a bunch of people killed at least 50 000 Americans caused a friend of mine got a stroke from it it caused all these issues with people they were aware of it as internal documents that showed that it was going to be a problem they knew it was going to be a problem but in the internal documents they said but we think we will do very well with this wow so they did very well financially I think they made something like 12 billion off of viox and they had to give up five so they got a fine of 5 billion but that means they had all that profit that's a lot that's it's sick when did that start to happen in our in our in our in our country when did it start to happen that there there's that we're not protecting our people like when did that does that mean like profit it's all profit if there was no money in this they would go after those folks 100 there's money in our time in existence of time was there a point where that wasn't the way of the thing well here's the first problem advertising for pharmaceutical drugs on television yeah advertising for pharmaceutical drugs is illegal in every country in the world except for New Zealand and the United States wow because you shouldn't be able to influence people to want to take these drugs that they may or may not need that should be entirely a conversation between you and your health care provider someone should be giving you an educated understanding of what the pros and cons are and this is why I think you need this and this is why you should take that it shouldn't be you coming to your doctor ask your doctor if la la is right for you do you have days where blah blah blah do you have that huh well la la is for you and they have these [ __ ] people dancing around in wheat Fields yeah you know and spinning their daughter around a merry-go-round and everything looks like a great old time yeah yeah they have like two black people like hugging in a bathtub or something like a cookout everybody's having a great time yeah Bliss yeah it's about happy moments but here's the thing you take those pills they're not going to invite you to that cookout you still got no friends you're just at home on pills dude I've done it you're not yeah you're not [ __ ] recessive you're not doing CPR on some senior citizen somewhere like they're playing pickleball in the sun yeah you're out there suffering by yourself oh but it's crazy it's like everybody wants to be happy so if the problem with advertising is I mean it's one thing if you're advertising for a nice pair of shoes or something like that I don't find any problem with that it makes people want them but what's the downside you buy something you really can't afford that's the worst downside I don't find that to be that much of a problem I don't find advertising in general to be a problem because I believe generally if you're intelligent you should be able to like navigate that but when it comes to things like drugs and especially when it comes to antidepressants and when it comes to these things that they're advertising constantly on television constantly on YouTube just constantly the amount of money is so extraordinary that they put into advertising it's such a huge chunk of the advertising budgets of television shows every show every show I mean it's not a joke it's every it's like don't we see that that's obviously not we don't need everybody to be on pills yeah and well they think you do but this is what was what I found so bizarre look I never thought I would be in the center of any sort of controversy about pharmaceutical drugs or about health care never thought that I would be in the middle of it but one of the things that stunned me was talking to these people that were doctors that were fat that were unhealthy that didn't take vitamins that didn't exercise that definitely didn't optimize their health and they were trying to put in your head that the only way to be healthy was to get injected with some experimental medical thing and that's [ __ ] horseshit that's never been the case ever that's that that violates all of our understandings about the the human immune system about health and wellness about you just your overall metabolic Health it violates all of our understandings people who are healthier people who exercise people go outside who get vitamin D people that are taking vitamin C people that are supplementing they have a much better time with any kind of illness they get yeah and there's there's a lot of documentation about this this is science too but the problem is it's not science that's supported by these companies that are directly funded by pharmaceutical companies yeah whatever these organizing bodies are are whether it's the FDA or the CDC or whatever when you look at what happens with the FDA and the CDC how these people go from being presidents and being the people that that that uh recommend policy and then they go on to become [ __ ] CFO or CEO another of a pharmaceutical yes there's a [ __ ] revolving door and it's evil that [ __ ] should not be legal I agree it's crazy that they're allowed to do that well how do we stop that kind of stuff though how do you as like a regular person I mean it's just like you can't a regular person can well you can get the the voice out to all these people that these people look if anything we learned from the pandemic you gotta you can't trust these people you cannot trust everything they say is being fact you just can't there's another thing that got released today about reproductive uh repercussions of the covid vaccine let me I'll find that for you because there's people that been talking about this that they're just now they're finding out that they're they're absolutely is negative side effects for women that are pregnant for women's reproductive uh health for um well I'll tell you this Joe see if you can find that you know something I think it came from the UK it just got released today I remember you know I grew up in an environment where uh Tulane University I've told you this before they had their primate testing facility in our town right yeah and um a bunch of chimps got out once and we got to help the police go get them right I told you about that yeah but um but they that's where they tested the code the uh the polio vaccine right that's where they made it and it caused cancer in a lot of uh women like in their cervical cancer I believe but they had already made it and they're like it'll cure it'll stop polio but some women will get service so they just released it did you know that polio 95 of people get polio it's asymptomatic so what does that mean I'm reading this book about this that might not be true so I need to make sure that this book is accurate but what they're basically saying in this book is that a lot of the cases of polio that we talk about from back in the day DDT was in widespread use back then widespread use as a pesticide and they were using DDT to kill bugs that they thought carry diseases but the problem is DDT exposure is insanely toxic now we know that now DDT they don't use it anymore in America yeah but they still use it in other countries where polio-like symptoms are very prevalent one of the side effects one of the effects of DDT poisoning is polio-like symptoms I think it's called um encephal encephalopathy see what that is a DDT side effects we didn't have a lot of polio I don't think in our area well polio was something that was going on in the early part of the 20th century you know and it's widely credited at the polio vaccine is what stopped that I used to wholesale believe that until this pandemic and now I question everything now I'm like I don't know I don't know what the truth is with whether it's smallpox or Polio I I have a feeling that there's a lot more to the story than what the general narrative is that we've been given is that vaccines are this amazing cure I think there's a lot of other factors and I think one of the other factors was hygiene and it's the book is called dissolving Illusions and it's all about the uh origins of vaccines and what vaccines have done to you know stop disease spread and what the negative side effects have been and it's just like there's a lot of negative side effects man and to pretend that it's safe and effective like when you're administering things to Millions if not hundreds of millions of people like there's going to be some problems and they don't want to advertise those problems and yeah they don't want to make those problems publicly known oh yeah yeah you can't [ __ ] can't whisper you can't see far there's all kind of [ __ ] side effects dude we had a guy who broke into uh Walgreens and did like seven um he was addicted to the [ __ ] coveted vaccine he did like seven inoculations I got a lady in my neighborhood that keeps getting boosted her doctor told her to stop getting boosted doctor's like no more she's like I gotta go to L.A I need to get boosted the doctor's like it's enough that's enough this is most of the side effects I can find okay DDT at low environmental doses or unknown following exposure to high doses human symptoms can include vomiting Tremors or shakiness and seizures laboratory animals showed side effects and liver and reproduction DDT is considered possible human carcinogen um in this book they were talking about paralysis uh all sorts of issues a lot of laboratory animals are [ __ ] though aren't they I don't know it's estimated that 95 to 99 of people who contract polio virus are asymptomatic isn't that wild wow so what does that mean you don't even know you had it right it's not doesn't affect it your body fights it off that was the same for me I remember I came here and got tested for coveted by you guys and I had the antibodies yeah you had it and you didn't even know yeah that was a lot of people with covid but I think that's people that are healthier I think that's people that got exposed to it I know I got exposed to it because my whole family got it my wife got it both my kids got it and I was at home with them I didn't protect myself at all because I was like they seem okay I'm healthy as [ __ ] I'm like let's see what happens and I never got it and I didn't protect myself at all I had sex with my wife I hugged my kids my wife was like you're gonna get it my breath it was one of those things where I was trying to see and there was two days where I worked out two days and during those days where I was working I was like oh I feel weak and so I just like broke a sweat I just didn't push myself I just gently worked out I did like 35 pound kettlebells nothing crazy I went through like a Mobility workout I did it two days in a row and then the third day I felt [ __ ] great yeah the third day my body was like let's go and I had a hard workout the third day and I'm like all right whatever it is I didn't get it and I didn't even have antibodies I had nothing I got tested for antibodies like nothing so I know I was exposed to it but my body completely fought it off and then the time that I did get it we had flown to Florida we did a gig and then we flew to um I think it was Orlando did another get we're doing Arenas right and it's in this in the round so it's a coveted spray people just spraying covet at you laughing and cheering [ __ ] and then I went out with my friend John showman and we uh I had like five Margaritas we played pool till 3 30 in the morning oh wow and you know pool's intense for me I play serious pool and there's a lot of concentrate I was tired and that night I was like God damn I'm [ __ ] feel like [ __ ] he was tired but I thought I was just hungover and drunk I thought I was like oh God I gotta go to bed and I woke up in the morning I'm like I don't feel right I felt off you know I just didn't think it was covered 100 it was covered yeah and then that night I did an arena no problem wow killed great show and then flying back that night I was really cold I was like is it cold on this plane and Tony was like no it's not I'm like man I feel like [ __ ] yeah and so when I landed I called my wife I go I don't know probably nothing's going on but I feel like [ __ ] so maybe we should sleep in different rooms and then I got tested in the morning turned out that I had it I was sweating all night like that night I was like very sweaty and then the next day got the IVs the day after felt pretty good the day after that I made that video then and then [ __ ] CNN accused me of taking veterinary medicine yeah better quick dude I took steroids in high school I'll take [ __ ] whatever horses are taking horses are doing great first of all you [ __ ] you know you know how many horses are looking awesome they do look great yeah what the [ __ ] but not only that that medication is not horse dewormer it's literally a human medication that's been prescribed to billions agreed it's a billion [ __ ] way for them it's just [ __ ] shitty news it's not just shitty news it's propaganda that they did on behalf of the pharmaceutical companies they did it under the guise that they're a news organization but how do they get so many people to but that's why I'm like how does a a medical group get so many people to believe that simple they shut their businesses down and everything like if they had to they had to I mean if the the government of LA or the government of California tells you you have to shut your business down you have to shut your business down yeah and the people like me who got coveted and got over it very quickly that that's infuriating because I have had the flu that lasted a lot longer than that yeah yeah like with the right medications you can get over it but they didn't want anybody knowing that right that's why they were trying to limit monoclonal antibodies they didn't want people just taking that because you just get right better yeah I mean but yeah that's one cool that's one cool thing that Bobby knows about he knows about a lot of that stuff oh my God he's the best source of information about that stuff ever because he can he's so brilliant he can just recite it at any point like you can bring it up and he'll explain to you what the actual test said versus like the actual test when they said the code it was the vaccine was 100 effective do you know they did that how they did that because two people I think the the way it was is like two people in the uh the placebo group got covered one person in the vaccine group got coveted so it's double which means it's 100 effective it was something stupid like that like their measurement of a hundred percent effective is so dishonest yeah it's Sneaky it's like they're technically allowed to say things that that way right but like when they were saying things like it stops transmission they had to admit they they one of the CEOs of Pfizer one of the head Executives had to give some speech at Europe your I think it was the UK Parliament and they had to explain that there was no testing done of whether they'd never tested to see if it stopped transmission they only tested to see if it gave antibodies and it did but all that other stuff was horseshit you know the like when Rachel maddows on TV going it's going to stop that virus in its tracks the virus ends with you you can't affect anyone you can't get infected it's a lie that was a lie and they no one's being punished for that and they'll say that Bobby Kennedy is spreading misinformation where everything he said you can verify everything he said is true but there's no money in agreeing with him the amount of money that these news organizations supposed news organizations get from being on the side of the pharmacy food companies and being in their good graces is [ __ ] millions and millions of dollars in advertising revenue and they have a very specific mandate and so does YouTube and that's why YouTube pulled your video yeah I mean it was shocking to me because the videos have been up for a long time you know the clips had been up for a year and then yeah they hit us up and we're like yeah we have to take these down because they spread what was the specific thing coveted misinformation the specific thing that they said about it yeah what was the specific subject that Bobby brought up that they said was uh misinformation um let me see if I can find it because a lot of the things that they used to pull videos for back in the day they don't pull anymore um uh it was let me see Bobby Kennedy Jr on Dr fauci um Trump called for a meeting with Bobby Kennedy Jr about vaccines and Trump and Dr fauci met with Bobby Kennedy Jr about vaccines those three clips but I just thought it was interesting that like for the timing for me was really interesting I mean I was upset how long ago was this they pulled it two weeks ago really yeah a week and a half ago really so they'd been up for a long time so it made me think like well why now but it also could have been running for president that's why that's what I first thought and that's probably what I do think it could be also I don't know how the algorithm works if his name is getting propelled more so then it makes Clips more prominent so then they see them yeah I mean you know I'm in but here's I mean the thing that upset me the most was that no no a lot of I don't know so many addicts died from um all the AAA rooms all the sobriety rooms all the recovery all the 12s everything got shut down shut down and so the number of people that died from that yeah is more than the number of people that died from coping well how about the number of people that died that didn't get diagnosed oh you covered your face I like what you did that I like to [ __ ] get in there you got in there you got in there [ __ ] getting in there boy I'll come in this [ __ ] thing let me just don't do that so many people so many people died from dude what's the difference of different things because of it is this do you think this is the gayest way you could jerk off if you lay on your back right and jerk off with your legs in the air no I watched a monkey jerk off into his own mouth I think that's the gayest way oh the monkey was hanging from his feet and he jacked off into his own mouth was he stuck somewhere was he trapped I was having a good time oh yeah that's crazy dude he was stuck oh yeah if you're in an avalanche or something I could see you having a snack no but I think if you're gonna leave it in your body I think he eight is gonna come before he died of anything that people try to hide I'd rather notices I only had a little but I'm not dying on an empty stump I'm you know you'd have a you'd have to have something you gotta have something bro you're dying you've been trapped for four days in an avalanche you think that jerking off in your own mouth is gonna give you some form of relief I think it's gonna buy you another Afternoon Of Being Alive full afternoon from a load what kind of loads are you shooting kind of Peter north-sized loads are you chugging down Jesus Christ I don't think it works that way oh I think buy you a whole afternoon that's [ __ ] weiner wine at that point if you're stuck in an avalanche if you had like a radio like okay it's gonna sound crazy but to buy yourself a whole nother afternoon Theo I'm gonna need you to jerk off in your mouth no ah come on man you're [ __ ] you've changed you just reminded me of this video oh my God I saw this guy yeah he's skiing and he sees something sticking up out of the snow and it's a snowboard flipped upside down oh is there a person in there yeah yeah it starts it's like yeah hey can you hear me you know like the guy sort of answers I think I oh there's a lot of guys will meet up anywhere oh my God the guy's alive in there completely upside down you haven't seen the show no no I thought this was a different one that I saw he just starts digging him out he luckily oh my God he had a shovel in his bag and there's no way if you don't test this dude's breath can you hear me how did he find this guy dude the way he look I'll show you right now how he sees it too I'll go back to the beginning skiing with a friend and it's thick powder he's probably worried about his own life for sure and then all of a sudden I think oh he sees the little board right there yeah and he has to get back up too that's insane what are these what are the odds oh my God they didn't go there so scoot ahead to see him pull the dude out you're right I think I don't know I'll dig you out okay thank you yeah no problem man thank you oh my God this guy was done you guys polite a few more sandwich from your mouth there's his mouth oh my God oh wow it must be like being reborn it must be exactly what it's like to be born look at this guy he is deep under that [ __ ] yeah he was probably out cold what did he breathe I I don't know it must have happened like minutes before yeah I haven't read any sort of like follow-up on like how long that guy was there because this has happened this happens there's other stories I found trying to find this one even how long can somebody breathe under snow I wonder they're the weather when I found the guy said he's been there for six hours oh my God so air must be able to get in there then huh I don't know I mean I guess like wherever your space is that you know the creation of space from your head going under and then the snow covering maybe it's not perfect there's some air like maybe if you make as much space as you can when you're in there how much air can get to you if you had a plant with you covered and he was upside down but if you had like a small plan or something how long does it take a plant to make air uh oxygen do you think you have to have like a little flower pot with you yeah I mean does it work like that don't use it all up so fast but yeah I would do do little sips yeah like water if you're in the desert just take a little sip every now and again man what are the odds of that guy staying alive that's wild man got a new lease on life that's a [ __ ] up way to go too because he was conscious under that it's scary [ __ ] yeah it is being alive feels scary sometimes doesn't it just regular yeah also just like I feel like it just you know it just feels kind of like I don't know it just feels a little spooky really I think so sometimes sometimes like right now I think you have moments where you realize you're alive you have like moments like that like real like moments you're like holy [ __ ] I'm [ __ ] alive yeah it like hits you in a weird way and you're like I'm [ __ ] alive like what the hell hmm and then you it's almost like the same when you have those feelings like oh my gosh one day I'm not gonna be alive it's that same sort of like that's a weird one and it gets so like there's just sometimes it drops into your body and you can really feel it you know yeah dude you think the wind you think we could ever decipher the wind like the wind like you think the wind is ever trying to tell us something we don't know how to hear it anymore no no I don't think at all the wind is just the wind I don't think the wind is trying to tell you something maybe the Earth is trying to touch it but do you think the Earth could might use the wind to try to tell us something because how else would it tell us well definitely be telling you something if you're an animal that storms are coming right right so if it tells you that it could easily give you other information maybe I think really you're learning it from the animals though who know it from the conditions there's like certain parts of the world where When Storms are coming like birds will stop chirping everything gets real quiet and then people kind of know oh they've learned to know that when the animals behave a certain way the storm is coming you imagine what it was like back in the day we had no idea when a hurricane was coming he just like living on some Seaside town everything seems fine about to go to bed you're just whistling your wife like she's like play me a tune Danny [Music] and the sky becomes an angry monster that tears houses apart hello there [Laughter] they used to have some dudes that would get out there and try to let those you think the wind could jerk you you think the wind could make you ejaculate if it were powerful enough I think you're horny I think you're just thinking about come a lot you got a lady friend nope maybe that's what's going on yeah I just went on vacation by myself Whoa by yourself solo yep where'd you go uh Maui really what do you do when you go on vacation by yourself just get up early go to sleep early um I was trying to get like my circadian clock or something again Rhythm yeah where did you go to like Four Seasons or something yes and just hang out by yourself did you go by the pool what do you do by the pool when in the beach uh what else did I do did people weird out by you like hey you feel Von some people yeah meet a lot of people like what are you doing like oh I'm on vacation by myself or something what made you decide to go to Maui by yourself um where'd that come from well sometimes I like to have time by myself I don't get it I mean I guess I get a lot of time by myself but um I wanted to have nothing to do right and I wanted to go and get like in the beach where I feel like it's like there's something magical about the beach you know it's like this is where Mother Nature is really [ __ ] you know yeah this is where she's dialing up things so but what was the thought process you're sitting in front of your computer you like Googling places to go I need a vacation by yourself have you ever done that before no I've never done that before either just my first one by myself yeah so I thought yeah I just said I need a vacation and then I was like well if I told myself I'm gonna give myself a vacation I need to make sure I do it so that I'm not like building up this bad story with myself where I tell myself I'm gonna do something and not do it oh so yeah I went on it I had a nice time by yourself yeah relax a lot of Filipinos over there you know a lot of Hawaiians are low-key Filipinos really yeah I didn't know that oh it's remarkable man I met so many uh Filipinos man they're great huh oh I love Filipinos [ __ ] they're good well you know I probably do it they're just friendly people man oh yeah real friendly people if I die or if whenever I die if I die I am going to I want the last person I see to be Filipino really easily who do you want to see you think why Filipino you telling me you're dying right you're like oh gosh and then some guys like hello [Laughter] my name is Joey my name Joey is a common Filipino name Joey yeah yeah or uh Sunny they have like kind of easy names you know yeah friendliness happy names yeah happy names yeah yeah everything's fine you'll be like okay they're some of the best pool players in the world are they really oh yeah yeah the American GIS went over to Philippines in I think it was the 1950s after World War II and they introduced them to pool I think that's how it happened American pool God they're so good I mean I just I don't know I think huge over there the pool playing pool oh my God yeah the the real famous pool players they're famous like like a pro baseball players famous over here look Efren Reyes he's a celebrity in the Philippines like the greatest pool player of all time he's from the Philippines yeah they made me the Hat thing they just make me the happiest when I see them interesting there's something just so like warm and accepting about them well especially just island people in general yeah when you go to Hawaii like those [ __ ] know how to live yeah they know how to live they know how to live they're living in Paradise you're walking around in flip-flops like it's fine everything's gonna be cool yeah everything's fine dude everything's cool I love Maui yeah it's great well you told me about it before I think and you told me to even stay at that hotel yeah it's great you know right but uh Duncan went there and when donkey was there somebody got ate by a shark oh yeah yeah not even like that far away from the resort I did snorkeling and it was very alarming it's spooky Sports snorkeling did you see that video of the dude in a kayak that gets attacked by a tiger shark while he's on the kayak bro this dude's fishing on a kayak a little kayak like the size of this [ __ ] table and this tiger shark just comes zipping at him and takes us check this out watch this give me some volume oh tiger shark holy [ __ ] Bro watch that again Watch This Again watch this [ __ ] sneak up on him he's just chilling this is off Oahu look at it coming [ __ ] that bro that [ __ ] bit you beat your boat look at it biting the boat man that thing doesn't give a [ __ ] dude they'll eat anything they're so vicious those are the ones that bite people some guys some kid just jumped off of a ship the other day into the water oh yay fell overboard right he jumped apparently it was a dare this guy was out of Baton Rouge actually was it on like a cruise ship yeah it was like is he dead he disappeared yeah so he's either yeah disappeared would you rather being disappeared is kind of interesting because you could come back I don't think he disappeared I think he drowned well did some people say they thought they in the part of the video they thought they see a shark hmm do you see the video in the middle of the ocean do you know most fish are around the middle most fish are within like 200 miles of shore I believe that yeah because the open area like when you go deep deep deep deep deep in the middle of the ocean there ain't [ __ ] out there nothing's out there yeah it's like the desert oh yeah huh yeah it's like the wet desert I think that's true with the Google that the majority of fish are 200 miles from Shore I'm pretty sure that's true I'm trying to think if I've seen a fish way out there before [ __ ] those tiger sharks though right [ __ ] those things that's one of the ones that got the person that when Duncan was staying there um oh yeah look dude I was started snorkeling and so finally I realized like there wasn't even any fish there I was like this is bad and the water would lift you up and then it would like set you down like in a bunch of rocks and I'm like this is real scary so I had to come back in and I knew it was weird because like the lifeguards were looking at me so I was like I'm getting out there yeah I was like it is people get out there man you watch them swim out there and you know some dude from [ __ ] Cleveland they can't blame him on the ocean and he's out there as well you can get jacked out you can get jacked by a [ __ ] ocean werewolf that tiger shark is an ocean werewolf and that thing just leaped out of the water and bit that dude's boat [ __ ] man what did it think that was like people say oh it thought you were a seal that did not think that that was a seal that thing probably thought it was a boat there's a person on the boat and I like to eat that person well Nature's [ __ ] probably getting pissed after all the [ __ ] that has been happening mother nature that she's gonna send animals she's gonna send weather she's gonna send storms she's gonna send snow to try to kill that guy I believe that mother nature is going to have a play in all of this why does Mother Nature go after the Sackler family hopefully she'll get to him how would you get to him you think I don't know I [ __ ] hate those people so much though yeah it's evil I mean it's evil man they're just bawling just eating caviar driving around rolls royces but they don't have any feelings well I think what happens with people when they're a part of something really big it's a it's called the diffusion of responsibility because there's so many people there like they say that if you're in a crowded area and someone gets jumped by someone someone's beating that person up you feel less likely you feel like you don't have anything to do with it you don't have to intervene because there's so many other people there they're not going to do it if you're not going to do it they're not going to do it it's a diffusion of responsibility so many people but if it was just you and another person that person was getting attacked and they're like help me help me you would feel compelled to help because it's only you I think when you're a part of an enormous corporation that has thousands of employees that's doing evil [ __ ] like the Sackler family I think you just think you're a part of a thing and you think you could probably dismiss it by saying well for most people this provides them the needed relief from pain and if used correctly there's not an issue but it's an incredibly Dangerous Drug and it's an incredibly Dangerous Drug that's given out far too frequently far too easily and I know this from my own personal experience I had my nose fixed had a deviated septum and uh the guy fixed my nose and he wakes me up you know after the you know after you go under and I have these things stuffed in my nose my nostrils stuffed up and he offers me two different painkillers oh dang he writes me a prescription for two different painkillers I'm like well how painful is this gonna get and he goes well a lot of people find it very painful and a lot of discomfort and this will help you and I go but is it going to get more uncomfortable than right now and he's like well how do you feel right now I go I feel fine like it's not it's not even hurt and I'm like okay he goes I really think you should fill these because otherwise you know if you need it you're not going to have anything you're going to be miserable I'm like okay so uh I didn't and I went home and I waited and I'm like I don't feel bad at all like I feel fine and after a certain amount of time you take the things out of your nose and they take they had uh stuck these plastic splints in my nose oh yeah and they remove all that stuff and I never took anything and I never felt pain but this guy it gave me this stuff and he gave me two different ones like and he was a really good doctor it's not like he was a [ __ ] quack if I decided to just start popping them I'd be like ah hey man I need it I got an operation I need it yeah meanwhile there's not a Corvette yeah there was nothing wrong with me like I was fine like after the operation after I woke up from the anesthesia I mean it was didn't feel great but it wasn't like I'm in agony yeah so they're just giving me oxycodone yeah and I'm not even her it's not like I did something give me something for the pain oh my God I'm in agony he was like how do you feel I go I could feel pretty good like I wasn't being a tough guy I was like there's nothing here yeah it's like a mild discomfort and most of the discomfort was because my nose was stuffed with these sponges yeah yeah and tubes they give you like plastic straws that poke out of the bottom of your nose and it's dripping down onto the upper lip yeah yeah pretty cool yeah but it wasn't that bad it was barely a problem yeah well look I think it is give amount and people now were so used to also were really comfortable just taking whatever is going to make us check out for a minute yes that's the reality that's the reality that's the reality and that's what you have guys like Ryan holiday did he come on here yeah where you have guys that are taught that talk a lot about like that moment where you choose between what's comfortable yes or what is easy and this other like more long-term thing what is the long term and we've just gotten very used to taking that easy thing yeah and it's just it's some of that is also just us getting acclimated to uh technology and advancements and and a lot of those things are good for us and so we we're used to that you know a lot of people have a really hard time delaying gratitude yeah which is why they overeat which is why they don't exercise which is why they take pills they want it now Jerk It Off even yeah the number one is that your number one I mean it has definitely for my 20. do you try not to look at porn yeah how does that go I mean it's gone better if I'm real honest with you I'll say this though I do believe and a lot there's probably a lot of men that if you lay on your back and masturbate you have you done this I like how you just pointed out yeah if you lay on your back and jerk off with your legs in the air you keep saying this have you actually been doing it I don't know that I've done this I saw it somebody drew it somewhere and I saw it someone drew it diagram this is the gayest thing ever I'm just saying something about your feet up in the air Whack It Off you guys need to get your lives together yeah we do I'm learning from you you guys please tell me more you guys have changed a lot I'm just saying if we could decipher the wind we would figure all this out maybe maybe it's the Earth itself that's trying to give us messages I got a video for you guys what's this what is Biden doing [Applause] [Music] he fell down again okay I can't I can't anymore well here's the sad thing man and I'll say this because look my dad was 70 when I was born my dad was an old man yeah so I grew up around a lot of like uh environments where sometimes people would take advantage of my dad because he was old but he just fell he didn't even fall for a reason right but it's just not fair like at a certain point you can't it's not cool for all it's not cool to old people to do that to them no like he doesn't know this is happening to him yeah but he kind of does and he's kind of a [ __ ] well that could be true but he doesn't know he's always been a [ __ ] though if you go back and listen to that guy lying about his his uh education record and lying about his accomplishments and like he's always been a problem yeah politician and pilot that whole yeah it's a [ __ ] but then also the all the [ __ ] stuff with his son and the the ties to Ukraine and China and the money the family that they got paid millions of dollars and everyone's trying to obscure it because well it's better than Trump better than Trump if that guy was a republican they would be up his ass with a microscope I know it is unbelievable but he represents the the what they thought was a like a sane alternative to what president Trump was yeah they thought this is insane Donald Trump as the president [ __ ] that anything is better than him and so they went with this corrupt career politician yeah I mean it's wild stuff men they even got the FBI involved in telling Twitter to censor the information about the laptop it's crazy but how do we get out of that space how do we because we're starting to turn into one of those kind of like uh Central American countries where the government is so confident like it's crazy it used to be a long time ago like if the secrets of our country got out like during Watergate or whatever right people were like [ __ ] no but now if the secrets get out people are like [ __ ] yes tell us what's going you know what I'm saying it's interesting how that's kind of changed like yeah before it would be like if any like top secret documents whatever were released it would seem like um uh wrong well but now if they're released we want to know what it is it's like does that make any sense well when was top secret documents released that that are showing that someone is behaving in an illegal way where it's bad I mean Watergate that was what Watergate was all about yeah they found out that Nixon was spying I mean I think the problem is that first of all the media is overwhelmingly left-leaning and if you have a left-leaning politician or a left-wing Democratic politician and then you have this media that essentially Works to support that person I mean they'd ignore any information that leads to distrust in the government or distrust in this Administration or distrust in this this party this political party yeah it's the dark arts man it is the dark that is that's the real dark arts it really is and you know what we what I think one thing that we need I think would be nice what if there I wish there was a an app right and everybody has an app idea but I wish there was an app where when you went to a business you could tell where they put their political money right so then it would start to affect the bottom lines of companies so then those companies would stop because I think you have to get a little that's going on right now with all the woke [ __ ] like Target lost billions of dollars because they tried to have this Pride selection oh yeah gay mannequin yeah they well they had all these like Pride children's shirts and gay children yeah and then obviously the Bud Light thing with Dylan Mulvaney they've lost 20 plus billion dollars you imagine you just gonna send a [ __ ] can to some confused person that uh day 365 a Womanhood and you send that person a [ __ ] can with their face on and your company loses 20 billion dollars that is wild [ __ ] man so we're seeing that now where we never saw that before where people are going enough right enough stop shoving this down everybody's throat when I go to Target I don't want to see like [ __ ] yeah tuck pants where you like they're designed to help you tuck your dick like hey that's not normal and I don't want that right in front of everybody yeah yeah yeah I don't want to see a diaper for a baby where they can hide his dick under him or whatever yeah I don't think they have those but but they will soon yeah they might but there's a lot of just [ __ ] real weirdness with this group of people that is trying to like change the way people view sexuality and gender and all these different it's like they're they're proselytizing it's not as simple as their you would stop that at the I think you would stop that say if they had an application where I could say okay I'm gonna go buy coffee I'm gonna go buy a hat I'm gonna buy a corset whatever I want to get and I can look on this app first I'm just picturing you with a cup of coffee a hat and a corset hey bro you've changed no you [ __ ] chase bro you got the [ __ ] wrong idea dude what's in these yeah get yourself right but if there was an app though that's what I want an app where I say if I support this company right what is my money what does that company support right because then I think you're gonna get a lot of people are going to be able to support at least put their money where their beliefs are I think there's a thing like that there's like a there's an app there's a shows like America like supported America apps you need an even one you need one that's like but for both you need one that's down the middle yeah you know well there's there's a lot of companies now that are like really emphasizing American made yeah what if these Bella thoughts are American-made um I'm a part of a company called origin and origin produces they make everything in America everything they make except for like it's like one or two items that they they're very transparent about it like some of the parts of the soul of the shoot the boots that they make these handmade boots are made in South America but everything else all the fabric all the thread all the workers all the machines everything is made in America they make uh hunting gear they make they make these great stretchy jeans that you can wear they make great handmade boots like real high quality like a boot they make Jiu Jitsu geez origin check out origin they're the [ __ ] it's all American made Jocko is a big part of it he's the one who brought me in on the company oh yeah yeah cam Haines is a part of the company now too it's just the first American-made hunting apparel company because even though hunting is like this great American Pastime a lot of the clothing that you're making that they're making is made from China the a lot of the textiles a lot of the stuff is made from China I went turkey hunting I saw since I saw you last man yeah who did you go with this guy Michael Waddell that's right Michael Waddell Michael Waddell is a legend yeah he knows his [ __ ] man he's a fun dude oh he's a really he was great on the meat eater podcast with Steven ranella oh yeah yeah he was great he's just inner he's very entertaining to be very entertaining yeah me and this guy Caleb Presley went and we were just everybody's chasing those gobblers that's what they call them yeah did you get one no well what happened was we saw him right we did the you we waited two mornings we didn't get one then we're leaving right we're driving out and they're all like the games over the Hunt's over right you see some turkeys by the side of the road and they were just like they were like in the locker room after the game like it's over right one of them has a towel on his neck one of them's [ __ ] texting his wife right like they're [ __ ] chilling you know and uh this is you sneaking up on them no this is uh my buddy Caleb shot one okay so you didn't want to get one so tell me what happened with the the ones over on the side of the road they snuck up on him right here dude I mean they got they're having lunch like it was oh so this is the ones that are on the side [ __ ] snuck up on some that were in the locker room bro the game was over and [ __ ] killed one of them yeah well that's how it goes the game is always on well see as long as The Season's open the game is on and that's what I guess I realized um yeah every now and then you catch one slipping yeah oh they caught they took this turkey they re I mean its whole head disappeared turkey hunting is like elk hunting in the way where you're trying to get them closer to you calling them in that's why people one of the things that people like about it's so exciting and the turkey's like is that [ __ ] yeah do I hear [ __ ] like they have these uh here we are turkey uh decoys and they set these turkey decoys up they wouldn't let me hold the gun either they wouldn't why not they said it was some issue yeah what was the issue I'm not sure we should take you hog hunting oh I want to do it where you get to do it with actual Hands-On did you want to do that yeah do you know they use dogs with that that's fine the dogs hold the pig down and you went up and stab it I'm so not interested in that I've been offered to do that too if we pray first I would do it why would that help just to [ __ ] make it even you know I just want to at least let God know what I'm doing I think God knows what you're doing you're out there killing pigs all right well look man but pigs are one of the best animals to hunt because they are absolutely an invasive species that has to be controlled and I don't like pigs I'll say that yeah um I kind of like them I like them when they're domesticated but that's not a real pig yeah like pigs are a weird animal man if you let them go like do you take a domesticated Pig and you let it go within six weeks they start to transform their snout extends their hair changes gets bigger and bushier their their tusks grow like werewolves yeah like a wild pig that you see is essentially a domestic pig that got wild they're the same animal that's that's what's crazy wow you know there's different versions of them but that's the same animal damn yeah it's the same genus that's the whole group called Sue scarfa yeah I would love to have some real wild [ __ ] bacon do they have bore bacon it's not it's hard to get bacon off of a wild pig because they're not as fat but agriculture pigs like pigs that steal from farms you can get bacon off of them because you know they're they're eating people's crops and fattening up some of them are fat as [ __ ] and acorns sometimes you get a shot one that had eaten a lot of acorns yeah and it was like an acorny smell to the fat oh my God they're delicious me and John Dudley we went pig hunting in Tejon Ranch I shot this pig and we cooked it on the Traeger oh my God it was Sensational it was so good that sounds good we we slow smoked it on a Traeger oh just fall off the bone it was delicious so good I love some moist and delicious I love that but you gotta cook pigs like to a high temperature to avoid trichinosis especially wild pigs really yeah yeah and what is trichinosis it has what spiders no trichinosis is Like A Parasite and um most it's really weird but I think ninety percent of the cases of trichinosis in North America are from bear from people eating bear because they just don't cook it enough you have to cook bear like you cook bacon like you gotta cook it all and then when you get like store-bought bacon or store-bought ham even you don't have to cook it as much as they used to make a cookie because these animals never come in contact with trichinosis because they don't have they're not free range animals yeah they're just baked just hiding in like a basically a little farm or something they get it from eating animals that have it so if you get trichinosis you keep trichinosis for your whole life and if you died and somebody ate you they would get trichinosis they didn't cook you what if you have a child can a is it can you transfer it through DNA that's a good question I don't know the answer hmm Checkmate so we ended with that we got to get out of it oh yeah that's in my man thank you man thank you it's always a pleasure to hang with you yeah always good to see you had a great time congratulations on your Club thank you thanks for being there man it was fun fun watch you murder last night it was a good time cool I'll be around for the next few weeks let's go Theo Von let's go all right bye everybody [Music] [Applause] thank you [Music]

Channel: PowerfulJRE

Views: 1,063,753

Keywords: Joe Rogan Experience, JRE, Joe, Rogan, podcast, MMA, comedy, stand, up, funny, Freak, Party, Joe Rogan, Theo Von, JRE #1994

Id: lGPC18DTPdo

Length: 172min 41sec (10361 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 27 2024