Jarrid Wilson - Single & Satisfied

I'm you guys may be seated you guys having a good night awesome hey my name is Jared Wilson I'm one of the new pastors here at harvest I was actually born and raised in Corona California representing Corona people in here lived in Nashville for a few years pastoring and now I'm back but more importantly I'm the husband of to my beautiful wife named Julie and the father of two boys named Finch and denom it's about his hipster as I can get so hey real quick question I wasn't looking when uh when Greg asked I want to ask again real quick how many of you guys are single pop up your hands I'm gonna give you a second chance nice how many guys are in a relationship married included raise your hand all right how many of you guys would say it's complicated gonna raise your hand and how many y'all are in a relationship the other person just doesn't know it yet raise your hand you're like I'm sitting next to her right now bro be praying for me all right okay what we know it happens it's the only reason you're here all right hey tonight we're talking about singleness and what the Bible has to say about singleness and the reality is there's a lot of the things I'm going to be talking to you about tonight don't just pertain to single people so if you're married or or you've been divorced or you're currently dating or whatever you're engaged whatever it is maybe marriage for 50 years or 44 like Greg has said all of these things will be important to you and if you already know them it'll be a refresher and if this is the first time you've heard these things it'll be very important for you to take note of these things and what the Bible says about singleness and the person that we're called to be before we start searching for the person we feel like we're called to be with him and regardless of which categories that you fall into regardless if you're single or dating or engaged or married what we have to understand is that as believers the goal is not to be single or not be single the goal is to become closer to Jesus amen because we live in a world right now that likes to put marriage on this pedestal and a lot of times we felt like man if I'm not married I'm not going to be taken seriously in my job I'm not going to be listened to people think I don't have enough life experience the goal is not to be single or not be single the goal is to get closer to Jesus and then here's the other side I believe that God grants you you know the the yearnings of your heart and if marriage is something that you are seeking after in the heart of God I pray he gives that to you but at the same time what we also have to understand is that some people in this world God has called to be single and just because you're single that does not mean that God cannot use you just because you're single does not mean you don't have worth it doesn't mean that you have less worth than someone who is married God sees you the same He loves you he cares about you once again marriage is not the goal getting closer to Jesus is amen so what do I do while I'm single what's my purpose how can God use me well I did a little research in my studying time preparing for this message and let me just throw out some people in the Bible who a lot of scholars and theologians say we're actually single Paul Martha Ruth Joseph Nehemiah John the Baptist's and this guy who kind of gets mentioned a couple times throughout the Bible Jesus all of these people were single yet God used them in extraordinary ways so if you're sitting here today and you're thinking I don't have worth I don't have value I'm not married so I'm worthless no I'm telling you God has a beautiful plan for your life whether you are single or married and when you step into his purpose and step into the love he has for you that's when he'll start developing and unfolding that purpose for you amen for the next few weeks we're going through this series that we're gonna be journeying through called relationship goals where we'll be unpacking singleness marriage sex and parenting and what the Bible says about all of these seasons in life and when we look at each of these specific topics I think all of us can agree that our world has given us a very very misleading view on how they're supposed to be lived out amen through movies music advertisements social media whatever it is the world paints a picture that is quite contrary to that of biblical text but today we're going be specifically nailing down on the topic of singleness and who God's called you to be what your purpose is what God's plan for you is in this season and what it looks like to reflect the life that reflects Jesus my first point that I want you to write down if you brought if you brought something to take down notes go and pop up your hand this is important I pray you guys do this every single time God's Word is being taught to you marriage is not the mission becoming more like Jesus's marriage is not the mission becoming more like Jesus's you will not find a passage in the Bible that says in order for you to have an incredible life you must be married you will not find a single passage in the Bible that says in order for you to step into God's calling in your life and be used by the great love and mercy and power of God you must find that special someone and get married you won't find it because marriage is not the goal becoming more like Jesus is let's go to pray God we come to you right now and we thank you for the opportunity to read your word together and unpack what God's word your word says about singleness and the season that we have in life and what your word says about marriage and sex and parenting and all of these things father I pray that you will speak to each and every one of us including myself in a mighty way I pray you give us wisdom and guidance on how we are toward live our lives on a daily basis god I pray that you'll give us practical information on how to reflect you in a better way we love you we thank you and everybody said together amen integrity loyalty modesty and transparency in my opinion are no longer needed according to today's society and it's funny because as we begin to think about this I start to think of examples in which the world proves this to be true and I can't help but think of of a TV show I recently saw called married at first sight literally you throw two people into a room and they get married you see what happens I don't want to just see what happens with marriage but for some reason our world sees it as something that's really funny and cool to watch in marriage is something that used to be holy and now it's just a hobby sex is something that used to be holy but now our world has just turned into a hobby another one I saw was Fifty Shades of Grey both the book and the movie because on one side we call to respect woman but then the other side we're praising a movie that is abusing women another one I thought of is a TV show called sisterwife's one guy five wives see so our society and our culture and the young people in this room specifically are being raised to think that this is the way that life should be as it pertains to relationships and my purity and marriage in singleness man my wife and I just saw a commercial recently from a very popular jewelry company and I want to make sure I get the exact phrasing down you see this epic like boat ride and there's this girl and it zooms in on this ring and then there's like the super buff guy that's like driving the boat and he's got a captain's hat on it's really weird and it's like this crazy music in the background and it zooms in on the ring again and the girl says it may not be forever but at least it's for now I'm not going to tell you the name of the jeweler but it has my name in it it may not last forever but at least we have it now it seems that even the jewelry industry that that may be I think once actually liked marriage and liked the beauty of marriage is now just setting people up for failure because even they are saying man it may not last forever like why would you say that it may not last forever on this boat with this extremely ripped buff man and his captain hat but at least we have each other now my friends it's a joke would you not agree the last one I didn't know if I was gonna say this but I think it's funny Jersey Shore get drunk go tanning party some of you guys are young you don't know what that is but for some of you that in this room know what that is you get what I'm saying it's just it's a joke our culture and society no longer cares about the sanctity of marriage the sanctity of sex the sanctity of relationships instead it's all inward focus in what life is about you and you need to live your best life you need to do what you need to do that makes you happy and the Bible is so opposite of that a world no longers values integrity modesty commitment or faithful relationships romans 12:2 states were called to live a life that is contrary to that of the world do not conform to the patterns of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your minds one of the first Bible verses I ever remembered and it's because my parents paid me to memorize Bible verses but that's not the point the reality is is that that verse was a life verse to me and it constantly told me that Jared you need to leave live a life that's different than the world you need to be different than the rest of the people you come into contact with you need to be different than the television shows and the advertisements and the music you are called to live a life that reflects Jesus not the world so how do we navigate singleness in today's world how do we find satisfaction in singleness a recent study says that scientists now believe that the new official age of being a doll is age 24 which is a recent increase from the previous age of I hope you know this 18 some of you said the wrong number and I'm not gonna call you out but 18 this means that people are getting married later starting their careers later moving out of mom and dad's house later now here's the thing doing these things later in itself is not a bad thing amen because I want you to be prepared before you step into a marriage I want you to have a job before you step into having children we want you to be prepared that's not what I'm saying what I'm saying is is that we have a a society and culture that is basically we are lazy because we're relying on mommy and daddy to take care of us and that my friends is just not how the world works and I can promise you gentlemen a woman once in you a characteristic that follows the line of has a job can take care of me has his own place to live that's not in a creepy basement downstairs below his parents and can pay his bills amen [Applause] get your stuff together and the reality is that our society likes to bag on Millennials left and right I don't believe that all of us are bad Amen can I get an amen for that society time and time again in OneNote they'll say recent study says Millennials are moving out you know later than ever they're lazy they're lame and then on another side it's this new tech company founded by a 19 year old you know I'm like you can't get both but time and time again Millennials are called out and we're told that we're lazy and what I want you to understand is don't be like the rest of them that are making the rest of you look bad step up and be motivated and get your life together because I promise you it will make everything better if you can start now a lot of us are working towards nothing and here's the thing I'm not saying you have to go to school I'm not saying you have to have that baller job that you can just provide everything in your life but please at least just start somewhere when it comes to singleness you see that God time and time again is talking about us being wise and and being diligent in life don't just waste your time take advantage of the time that you have so you can set yourself up for success so that you're not stepping into a marriage or stepping into Parenthood going man I wish I would have learned these things a long time ago you have the opportunity right now to change that amen one of the things that I wrote down I said and then we're gonna jump into scripture is that I have to first admit that sometimes the church can be a little pushy when it comes to marriages pastors can be a little pushy when it comes to marriages but what I believe is that singleness is actually one of the most important experiences and learning opportunities we will ever have in life I have to admit that I for one was very bad at being single I was it's not a funny statement I just was terrible at it was impatient I was relationship to the next relationship I always liked being with somebody I was terrible at it and because of that there's a lot of things that I didn't learn until a lot later in life but I'll be the first to admit that pastors and churches alike sometimes can be a little pushy when it comes to marriage let me give you an example God comes up to a pastor and says hey pastor I'm it that's really good you know good incredible God loving nice girl last night he's like whoa did we can we set up the wedding and you're like bro all I said was I saw her chilis and she was really sweet he all don't go to chain restaurants but you know what I mean I met this sweet kind girl well can we get can we get marriage counseling done let's do some premarital counseling it's like whoa hold on I heard a lot back there the reality is is that yes even pastors and churches alike we can get things wrong and we can be pushy towards something because while marriage is incredible I don't want you to rush into marriage because you think it's gonna make you somebody incredible or rise above someone that is single because that's just simply not the case there's no partiality in the eyes of God right so tonight we're gonna open up in Titus chapter 2 and Paul is writing a letter to Titus and all the commentaries I've read on this says that Paul is writing this letter to Titus to give him basically a roadmap for young believers as to what it looks like to reflect an image of Jesus Christ in their everyday lives so I thought to myself what an incredible opportunity for us to read this together so if you're single in the room Paul is writing this letter to Titus a young believer so that Titus can take these teachings and teach other young believers what they should be doing in their times of being young so as we unpack this together there's gonna be a lot of characteristics that all of us can adhere to and chase after and at the very end I'm gonna do a recap and list off all of the things that Paul says that we should strive after and the reality is is that all of these things are obtainable when we step into a relationship with Jesus Christ and if you don't have a relationship with Jesus Christ here tonight at the very end of this I'm gonna give you an opportunity to make Jesus your personal Lord and Savior to turn away from the sin in your life and declare that today is the day that you'll walk out that door a new person and a believer Titus was a young guy that did a couple missionary journeys with Paul so they're pretty close so Paul is writing this letter once again to Titus who's a young gentleman in hopes that Titus will take these teachings and teach them to other young people and so as we start off in Titus 2 verses 1 through 15 it says as for you Titus promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching pause singles in the room and non singles but singles in the room do you reflect a life that reflects and promotes wholesome teaching think about it for a second do people look at you and say that is someone that I aspire to be like as it pertains to the spiritual walk with God do you live a life that promotes wholesome teaching and wholesome living because whether you're single or married or in an it's complicated relationship wholesome living is something we're all called to verse 2 says teach the older men to exercise self-control I love that word self-control everybody say that with me self-control one more time for good luck self-control to be worthy of respect because respect is something that you earn it's not just a given a man or woman does not respect you because you say so it's something that is earned and to live wisely are you living wisely they must have sound faith and be filled with love and patience are you exercising self-control are you patient are you protecting yourself from sexual immorality just immorality in general are you living a life that is worthy of respect from others patience is something that I've had a very hard time with even when I was single and now even while I'm parenting it's something that I will probably always have struggles with and I have to rely on God to give me the patience that I need because you can't tell you times I don't have patience as soon as my kids do something or they you know they talk back to me or whatever it is you know I have to learn to have pay shinsen and read God's Word and realized that this is something I don't just need to have in regards to my relationship with God but in my marriage and in my Parenthood are you making wise decisions in your spiritual life your financial life your physical life in your relational life students that are in this room right now SEM you guys are like man I don't we wouldn't mean my my my physical my spiritual my relational my financial life I get you know I get allowance and I spend it I mean my friends let me tell you something just real quick all your students in here right now if you can learn to be wise in your financial life now you will set yourself up for success for when you are older and not look back and go man I'm in a world of debt and I don't know what to do amen parents so in your life are you living a life that is wise in your physical life in your spiritual life in your mental health life I mean whatever it is in your financial life are you being wise are you making wise decisions you know did you pay the car payment energy by Easy's I don't know what your thing is right yeah I got a good just walk oh yeah I don't know what it is but are you making wise decisions these are all things that we should start doing now and even even if you've made mistakes all your life you can change the course in this trajectory because it doesn't matter what your family did or if you're like yeah I'm just like my mom I'm just like my dad you don't have to be them anymore because Jesus is giving you grace and love and you can change the trajectory of your family and be the person that God's called you to be and not live the life that your forefathers and your parents have amen gentlemen are you treating women with the respect and honor they deserve I wrote down this exact phrase because I feel like it needs to be said and not as a piece of meat as we've heard before women are you treating men with the respect they deserve in both sides of the coin need to understand that respect is not something that you say you need to give this to me no it's something that is earned it's something that is earned it's not something that's a given verse three similar teach the older women to live in a way that honors God they must not slander others or be heavy drinkers instead they should teach each other what is good in other words my friends don't get drunk I mean I have never met a person as a man if it wasn't for Coors Light I don't know where I'd be in life man if it wasn't for drinking I just don't know where I'd be it took me up no one's ever said that because it does not happen my friends time and time again I see singleness and alcohol go hand in hand it's like there's a marriage between singleness and alcohol that goes hand in hand and everywhere single people go alcohol is following everywhere alcohol goes singleness is following my friends I can't begin to tell you and this is personal in my life and my family how many times alcohol has destroyed marriages and parents and individuals and families alike amen please be careful when it comes to alcohol it also starts to talk about to not slander I mean are you someone that people don't like spending time with because you're always talking down about other people here he goes again here she goes again you're constantly putting down other people you can't let other people have a have a good moment you always have to point out the flaw verse 4 says these older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children to live wisely and be pure to work in their homes to do good and to be submissive to their husbands I'm going to catch on this injustice guy I'm going to talk about this then they will not bring shame to the Word of God in the same way encourage the young men to live wisely and you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching I wrote this down I'm gonna read exactly what I wrote because women I want this to come off the exact way that I wrote it down because I believe it to be true and I know you do to women I pray that you will find a man who seeks after the face of God leads your household to the feet of and treats you with the honor and respect that you deserve amen and gentlemen I pray that you strive to be that guy I pray that you strive to be that guy Paul's letter to Titus is encouraging women to live a life that can be admired by younger women that they come into contact with so both men and women in the room tonight do do people see you and say that's someone that I want to mirror my life that's someone who's doing it right that's someone that I had minor that's that's someone that I respect that's someone that I look up to because my friends we have a lot of terrible role models in today's world I think we need a little more Paul's and a lot more Martha's and a lot more Mary's and a lot more Ruth's in this world that people and young students alike can look up to and admire be an example to the rest of the world Paul wrote in first Timothy 4:12 don't let anyone think less of you because you are young but be an example to all believers and what you say in the way you live in your love in your faith and in your purity in other words just because you're young and immature doesn't mean you have to act young and immature just because you are young and immature does not mean that you have to act young dumb and immature I love that song yet you know just because you're immature does not mean you have to act young and immature but Paul says don't let people look down on you because you are young but instead prove them wrong by living a life of integrity and honesty in purity and love so that people can go that is an incredible person who's living after the cause of Christ are you an honest person verse 8 says teach the truth so that you're teaching can't be criticized than those who oppose you will be ashamed and have nothing bad to say about you or us as the Translation says once again are you an honest person do people view you as someone they can trust does your yes mean yes does your know me know me are you a flake a person I can't stand flaky people I don't even like the word flaky I think of flaky scalps I think of flaky skin the only thing I like is that's flaky is corn flake 'yes that's it people don't like flaky people because you can't be trusted because someone will give you a task and then without you knowing will give someone else the same task because they know you're not gonna follow through gentlemen that's that's not the kind of guy that a woman wants women that's not the kind of a woman that gentlemen want let your yes be yes and your no be no have integrity man do you have a good reputation with other people during your time of singleness are you building a reputation that is accepted and respected by those around you let me give you an example are you someone that other people tell someone that person is a catch are you someone that other people tell other people about because you are a catch and you are single and someone needs to get on that before someone else does that's the person you want to be someone who has integrity someone who has a good reputation someone who is honest and respectful someone that other people tell other singles that is someone man you need to chase after that person because if not someone else is going to get them someone else is going to get her my next point is this and please write this down I'm gonna say it a couple of times this is probably one of my most important points and and I just really want you to grab hold of this step into God step into who God has called you to be before you start searching for who God's called you to be with let me say it again because I even messed it up when I read it step into who God has called you to be before you start searching for who God has called you to be with leave it up on the screen for a couple more seconds so people can write it down I mean a lot of times we like I said we put relationships and marriage on this pedestal and it's the goal right it's it's the mission right marriage is not the goal getting closer to Jesus is what we have to understand is you need to step in who God's called you to be before you start searching and looking for the something the some on the special some that you want to bring into your life because the last thing you want to do is take a bunch of baggage and a bunch of brokenness and mistakes that you've not got right with God yet not seek repentance for and seek the wisdom and guidance from and then bring it into a relationship and drag the whole racial relationship down and I see it happen time and time again because people think that marriage is gonna fix the problems they had while they're single oh man I struggle with lust I struggle with pornography but when I'm married all that's going to change and then I see people in marriage counseling because someone has a pornography addiction and they thought that marriage was gonna change the thing that they needed fixing verse 9 says slaves or in the ESV translation it says bondservants must always have a their masters and do their best to please them they must not talk back or steal they must show themselves to be entirely trustworthy and good then they will make the teaching about our God and Savior attractive in every way what we have to understand is is bondservant and please when you go home look that up and study a little bit deeper bond serve as someone who declares and states that that's the person I'm gonna follow so we have to understand that we're all bond servants to Christ we have chosen to follow Jesus he is our master he is our Lord he is our Savior in what he does and what he says we will listen to and we will mimic verse 11 for the grace of God has been revealed bringing salvation to all people say all people with me all people here's the thing it doesn't matter what you did yesterday doesn't matter what you did today no mess is too messy my friends for the grace of Jesus amen no mess is - Greta is too messy for the grace of Jesus verse 12 and we're instructed to turn from godless living and sinful pleasures we should live in this evil world with wisdom righteousness and devotion to God while we look forward with to that wonderful day when the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ will be revealed He gave His life to free us from every kind of sin every kind of sin to cleanse us and to make us his very own people totally committed to doing good deeds and Paul's final words to Titus or this verse 15 you must teach these things and encourage the believers to do them you have the authority to correct them when necessary so you not do not let anyone disregard what you are say what you say my friends when we read through these passages 1 through 15 there is a list of words and a list of things characteristics that Jesus has that we're called to reflect and chase after and I want to read these to you real quick right Jesus is calling you as a single person or just a believer in general but as a single person I want you to grab hold of this and your time of singleness before you step into a marriage or step into relationships or step into parenting someone who reflects wholesome living self-control sound faith to be loving to be patient to not gossip to not get drunk to live wisely to live pure to have integrity and to teach the truth and everybody said amen let me say these things one more time wholesome living self-control sound faith to be loving to be patient to not gossip to not get drunk to live wisely to live pure to have integrity and to teach the truth and my friends all of these things are possible when you give your life and dedicate your life to Jesus Christ [Applause] my last point is this satisfaction in singleness is found at the foot of the cross satisfaction in singleness is found at the foot of the cross you want to find peace you want to find contentment you want to find your purpose you want to find your calling fall at the foot of the cross and all those things will be added to you I can promise you that satisfaction in singleness is found at the foot of the cross so the purpose of singleness is this it's simple it's an opportunity for you to become more like Jesus the purpose of your singleness the season of singleness for some of you and like I said for some of you God has called you to be single the purpose of your singleness is to get closer to Jesus because once again like I said marriage is not the mission becoming more like Jesus it's to work hard it's to be respectful it's to help others to reflect an image of the risen Savior and be an example of the risen Savior to those you come into contact with every single day wholesome living self-control sounds faith to be loving to be patient to not gossip not get drunk to live wisely to live here to have integrity and to teach the truth I don't care what you brought into this room this morning Jesus doesn't care what you brought into this room this morning no no no matter what the baggage is no matter what the the mistakes or the sins or the failures are there is no mess too messy for the grace of Jesus and God's love is so fast and so grand and His grace is so big that there's nothing you could bring to him that would allow him or maybe make him even think that is not someone I want to love he will love you and he will wrap his arms around you and my friends in your time of singleness and like I said before even if you're not single if you're married or you're engaged or even married for 44 years as pastor Greg said the person that you need to be is found when you fall at the feet of Jesus right now like I said in the beginning I want to extend an opportunity because I don't I'm not dumb enough to think that everybody in this room is a believer in Jesus or would call themselves a Christian some of you might have come because someone invited you some of you came because you saw this flyer and had the word sex on you're like that sounds it just I'm gonna go see what they're gonna talk about some of you're like well that dude is so good-looking and it was this guy named Greg Lauren you're like I got to go to that thing some of you a friend invited you a girl invited you a guy and I don't know why you're here your parents brought your parents encouraged you to go but if you are not a believer in Jesus Christ and you have not turned away from your sins and stepped into the relationship that Jesus has for you I want to give you an opportunity in just a moment to declare that today is your day to step into the life that Jesus has for you to acknowledge the cross the splintered piece of wood that Jesus God's Son was hung on where his blood was shed to cover your sins and your mistakes so there's that group of people that are in this room and then there's another group of people there's some of you that would say yeah you're believer but over the last couple months couple weeks couple years you've kind of fallen off the beaten path and all of these characteristics that I just laid out wholesome living integrity honesty love patient kindness you're going man I only checked off like two of those things I've got a lot of work to do and it's because I've been looking at the world for answers when the only answers I needed were found in the Word of God and so that's the second group of people that are in this room tonight so no matter who you are no matter what side you're on I want everyone to go in and close your eyes and bow your head and I want to give you the opportunity if you're the person who does not know Jesus but the kind of living that I just shared an illustrator right now that's found in Jesus that's the kind of life that you want to live or if you're the person that says man I've had a relationship with Jesus for a long time but man I've fallen off that beaten path and I need to get right with God because like I've only checked off about two of those characteristics you you said I want you guys real quick with every head bowed and eyes closed I want you go in and pop up your hand really quick so I can go and pray with you can you go and do that for me right now gonna pop up your hand praise God for you praise God for you and you and you and you there's a ton of hands going up right now please go in and pop up your hands so I can pray with you praise God for all of you praise God for you guys you three back there is there anybody else please do not waste this opportunity a couple more seconds praise God well for all the few guys back there is there anybody else a couple more seconds praise God for you up front right now I want us all to pray together because we are a family we are God's family we are God's children amen and I want all of us to pray together alongside everyone who raised their hand so can we all do that together can we all say dear God thank you for your son thank you for your grace and thank you for your love I turn away from my sins I turn away from my selfishness I turn away from my pride and today's the day I declare my love for you I declare my hope in you forgive me of my sins for I know there are many God we love you and we thank you and everybody said together amen [Applause]

Channel: Jarrid Wilson

Views: 82,412

Rating: 4.8649478 out of 5

Keywords: iMovie

Id: SZfSEcO64Z0

Length: 36min 40sec (2200 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 25 2018