(orchestral music) - [John] As human beings, we have the tendency to make mistakes. The good thing about mistakes
is that they are tests. Adversity builds character and sometimes only when we
suffer do we look for truth and although it's no fun
when we're going through it, in retrospect a lot of
the stuff in my life turned out to be a blessing in disguise. When most kids were just hitting puberty, I was out on my own, a seventh
grade drop out running wild. (police siren blares) New York was one of
the most violent cities in the country and if you
didn't mind your Ps and Qs, you were gonna have problems. It was a town of outlaws
and growing up back then taught me some valuable lessons, lessons that help me
survive in any situation, anywhere in the world. - Wall Street in the 90s
felt like the Wild West. It was the place to make more money than you ever dreamed of. Greed was good and I wanted my share. A young man looking to prove myself and compete with the big boys, but my biggest enemy turned out to be me. When I was New York, I don't
if I was ready to compete. I think I was still
chasing demons of my own. I failed, so I went to
London to start over. - He's a banker turned TV impresario. How did you make the transition? - I had enough one day, I just walked out, had no idea what I was going to do and then I started broadcasting people and ideas that changed the world. - The way to change the
world is to let people know how you've changed. - I've been impressed by
the power of a conversation. It's had a big effect on me. Up until I was 40, I
always felt disconnected, but this show forced me to change and sometimes I meet someone
who takes me on a new journey. - 10, nine--
- Let's do this. - [Announcer] Five, four, three, two, one. - This is London Real, I am Brian Rose, my guess today is John
Joseph, the musician, author and triathlete best
known as the lead singer of the hardcore punk band the Cro-Mags. Growing up on the
streets of New York City, you survived abuse, drug addiction, prison and later a violent stint in the navy. You credit the Hare Krishna movement for helping you get
through your darkest times. At 55 years old you compete regularly in Iron Man triathlons,
raising money for charity and you're here in London
on tour with the Cro-Mags, John welcome to London. - Thank you man, thank you
Brian, pleasure to be here. - You wouldn't know by looking at me, but when I left school in
Boston, I moved to New York City in '93 and I was drawn to
the East Village right. I was working as a banker, but all my boys were living Upper East,
Upper West and I thought it was fucking boring as sin, but tell me what was that area like back when you were there 70s, 80s? - They called it Alphabet City, because it's Avenue A,
Avenue B, Avenue C, Avenue D. You go to Avenue A, you're
adventurous, B, you're bold, Avenue C, you're crazy,
Avenue D, you're dead. - When you did start knowing that you wanted to be a musician? - I always was attracted to music, no matter hell we were going through, music was the salvation. The mind could be your best
friend or your worst enemy, that's what it says in the Bhagavad Gita, so you use the mind as a tool. You have to learn to harvest that shit. I've been dealing with that my whole life. That's my message. I did it, you could do it, you know, if you fight through this shit, you could get through it
because if I could do it, anybody could do it. - John, thanks for so much for coming on. - Thank you Brian.
- This has been awesome. - Awesome talking.
- And epic. - Yeah man.
- I mean I wasn't-- - I'm glad you had some
time down there in the Alphabet City too you know.
- I know, I've been around there, I saw some
of what's going on there. - Yeah, yeah.
- And look I appreciate it. I was looking forward to talking to you, because you're a fascinating dude. - Thank you brother.
- There's a lot of philosophy behind what you're doing. Thanks for dropping all these
stories and science on us. (calm rock music) (calm rock music)
(beeping) - Greetings from the frozen
apple called New York, how's it going?
- (laughs) Dude, it's going good man. You're London Real episode
is blowing up buddy. Everybody's loving your
vibe, your crazy stories. - Talking the old school stories, I know I brought back a lot of memories, fond and otherwise for
you, but I was thinking, I need to get that
motherfucker over here man. - I got no business being
in New York City man. I was there, I spent four years there. There's a reason my ass is in London. - You know my story is this
city could chew you up, it could spit you out, but
there's a lot of bad fish, a lot of growth, you know
what I call New York City? The ultimate bullshit detector. - That's the way I
remember that place man. It just brought out
the best and the worst. I mean it was no joke for me, John. Some shit happened to me blocks away from where you were and
it wasn't all very nice. - I ran from my demons and
they were always waiting for me, there's only one or two options, I'm gonna man the fuck
up and I'm gonna come or I'm gonna be a pussy
and I'm flaking on you and I'm gonna hide out with
my little English friends over here in you know and
drink tea and biscuits. Come on over and you know
walk these haunted streets with me a little bit,
regressive therapy type shit. - Oh my God, John. I don't know man, maybe we
got unfinished business, you and me.
- Let's see. Let's see, that's on you now. (calm rock music) (jet engine rumbling) (pounding rock music) - [John] Welcome to the
LES, the ABCDs of survival. New York was a pretty dangerous place back in the early '80s. There was no East Village
and Manhattan with its trendy little cafes, bars and shops. It was called Alphabet City, the LES, or Low East Side, a drug addict's heaven filled with junkies, musicians, and your high-bred junkie musicians. The city's parks were hunting grounds where dead bodies turned
up on the regular. It was never a dull moment and
plenty a holy fucking shit. Call me a freak, but I thrived on it. You fucking made it (laughs). - John Joseph, this is it huh? - This is where it happens.
- What's up man? Glad to see you.
- Glad to see you man. - Glad to see you man,
this place has changed man. - Give me a hug motherfucker,
pull it in, bro love. I actually sit here every morning and I do my meditation at the bench here. - Really, right over there?
- If you see the plaque in Hare Krishna tree, this
is where the Hare Krishna movement started.
- In America? - Right here, right fucking here and Prabhupada, it was
the first place he chanted Hare Krishna with people outside of India so he would chant here with the beatniks and the hippies and the beat poets and they would all just chant right here. - You want to hear something crazy John, I used to come and sit
right here on this bench in 2001, after everything
was going to shit, 9/11 happened, my girlfriend
of six years left me, my best friend from college
fired me from my job and I used to sit right here on that bench and just get a little quiet in my life and I had no idea the Hare
Krishna tree was here. - This is a holy pilgrimage from people come from all over the world. - It's strange being back here man. - Yeah dude.
- It's changed. - A lot of shit has changed man, a lot of shit has changed over here. - I've never seen people taking their little kids down here.
- These people don't even know I try to tell motherfuckers like you know Daniel
Rakowitz lived down here, the East Village butcher,
he fucking killed his girlfriend here and
made soup out of her and fed her to the homeless
under that statue over there. They're like, "What, oh
my God," so it's like they don't know the fucking history. I still have my memories like you do being down here.
- Yeah, there's still something special about this
even though I got bad memories. I don't want to think about this place in a bad way, you know? - You know what was the
impetus for you to come here in the first place? - I mean look New York City man, right? For me it was Wall Street, can I go and be there with the best, what drew me it was dangerous you know? And that's the same thing
that got me in trouble. - Yeah, well you know that's sometimes you gotta cut and run man, everything all our life experiences comprise who we are, if you
didn't go through that here, you wouldn't be in London. What you see as a fucking
curse ends up being a blessing. I don't know how many times I've fucking had that shit happen to me. I saw that as my whole childhood, I would be like why the fuck did I have to grow up without parents and be in a home and be on the streets and get locked up and be addicted to drugs? It's all ... (calm rock music) The future is unwritten, how
you want to live your life is determined every
single day when you open your fucking eyes, it
was up to me to wake up every day and try to better myself. Okay, day one, what's my day one? I'm not gonna smoke crack today and that was so fucking tough, because I couldn't run, I had
to fight my demons right here. (calm rock music) You know I got this race coming up. Another challenge, I always
put a challenge in front of me. So I signed up for Chattanooga. I'm gonna go over to the bike shop. I was thinking show you
that side of New York too. (drum heavy rock music) I got the machine over here,
this is my ace mechanic, I love this shop because it's like my homeboys work here, it's like the fucking old school shop. - Why you doing Iron Mans? - What it really is is about
beating down your demons every day, facing your
demons, it's discipline, you gotta do shit when
you don't want to do it and when you're at that start line everyone's conquering their demons man. I do it as a way for the motherfuckers that didn't make it out of all this shit and to show the next generation you can do anything you apply yourself to so Iron Man is you swim,
you get out of the water, you get on your bike,
and then T2 transition, bike to run. - How long's the break
in between each thing? - None, none, you don't
take no fucking breaks dude, there aren't no fucking breaks. You ain't checking your Facebook page you get up out of the water
and you're fucking running to get your bike shit on, you're running, it's move, move, move, move. This is not pussy man. This is Iron Man. I didn't call you here
to check out the bike, I called you here for a reason and even when I first talked to you I realised when you left New York you was running from
shit, but now you're back first time in 15 fucking years and I want you to do this
half Iron Man with me in Chattanooga, Tennessee, hold on, don't freak the fuck out. - What the fuck you talking about? - May 20th you are coming to Chattanooga, I'm not taking no for
an answer motherfucker, you're coming May 20th you are coming. - May 20th, that's fucking
three months from now. - Yo, you are coming.
- I got London Real, I got a full time show,
I got two young boys, I'm turning 47 this year. - You already have that
fucking mindset in here dude. I see what you do, you're fucking, you're just non-stop doing shit, but this is gonna teach you
a whole new level of focus, you're gonna fall in love with this sport. - This is serious training man. - I'm gonna tell you what,
I'm gonna tell you what, you're here till Sunday, I
want you to train with me, starting tomorrow, I'm just gonna take you through some stages.
- Let's train for the next few days, let's see what's up. - That's what we're gonna
do and have fun with it. - Okay.
- No pressure. Ha ha. You're in New York, don't
go smoke no crack. (laughs) - I'll see you tomorrow man. - All right, bro, peace. (piano music) - [John] I had an education from the university of the streets and that's something you can't find in any college curriculum. It was a magical time in the city and I wouldn't trade my experiences for all the money in the world. Those times are long gone,
and now New York City is a sterile, safe
version of what once was. I have to say I'm glad I was there and in some ways maybe it's
cool the city has changed. At least my mom can walk down the street without looking over her shoulder. (sighs) (egg cracks)
(beeping) - Yo John.
- It's the ball buster, I'm here to bust your
balls let me in. (laughs) - What's up?
- What up bro? What you got going on over there, what's that I smell?
- Little eggs, little sausage, you know.
- Bro. Did you read my book,
you know my book right? - Yeah, I read your book,
but that's for you man. - Okay, let me show something, how the fuck you turn this shit off? Yo, I got news for you, you see that? That was your breakfast. You know what that is now? Trash, bro I didn't tell you this, because I didn't want a little
too much shit on your plate, but you're doing this shit
on a plant-based diet. - Only plants?
- Only plants. - What about chicken, fish?
- No no no no. - I mean you need protein to--
- Yeah, I'm gonna show you something
dude, that's the protein motherfucking mess and
I've been doing this shit for 37 motherfucking
years, I'm not one of these New Jack snowflake
fucking plant-based vegan, I don't even use the word vegan. The protein myth and all the bullshit that's been propagated over the years that this is how you get nutrition, that's bullshit, that's
not a healthy breakfast. That's fucking garbage,
where's the greens? Where's the chlorophyll,
where's the alkalinity? That's all acid. That's going to cause you problems, so I'm putting a time constraint on you, but I'm telling you how to do it the right and the easy way. - What's next, I've gotta
do this with one leg? - Motherfucker you got jokes, so there's science behind it man. So I'm gonna go show you the science and how good science
can taste motherfucker. - All right, show me man.
- You ready, let's do it. - I'll believe it when I see it. - [John] Oh come on man,
that's what we're doing. All right.
- This is it huh? - This is the spot,
right across the street. What's up fellas? Come here, get in on this protein. You got protein, plant-based. - You're killing me John. - I'm gonna tell you listen you know why-- - You survive on plants. - You know why I got into this in 1980? Because I watched Bad
Brains, Rastafarian dudes, went on stage and fucking
blew me the fuck away. I was like yo, how the fuck
you got that much energy? He's like dude, I eat
telemana, I eat pure food that give me the energy. He don't eat meat and he
don't eat none of this shit. So this is where the power
and the energy comes from, all of this, the juices look at this. ♪ I must I and I run this way ♪ Swish it around, look at that cucumber, take a bite, I'm gonna take you up to the pool after we eat and show you what it's like
to be in the washer machine, which is what they cal the Iron Man swim, create chaos in the motherfucking water. (hard rock music)
(waves splashing) Under pressure reveals true character, what are you gonna do? I've had motherfuckers rip
my wetsuit, grab my feet, pull me down, punch me in
the face, break my nose with a kick, chip my
teeth, it's really like the mosh spit in the water. (hard rock music) That's what you do, you
turn onto your back, you fix your goggles because there may not be a safety crew with a paddle board or
a boat to hold onto. (hard rock music) - You wrestle in high school or what? - Yeah, a strong body
builds a strong mind, that's why I'm pushing you to do this race because it teaches you
that you could do anything you set your mind to and
smash the limitations that we place upon ourselves. ♪ This is my time showing my mind ♪ That's it, one more.
(screams) - Why do you do push ups and pull ups if you're training for an event where you run and you cycle and you swim? - For strength, for strength,
I'm not just the Iron Man. If I gotta push somebody in
fact last night it happened, guy comes on a city bike,
almost smashes the bike into me. I jump out the way and
push him so he don't hit me and he's like yo asshole
and I say what motherfucker. This is still New York. What does the billboard say? Come and play, come and play,
forget about the movement, that's the government's
job, keep you numb and dumb to what's really going on. Their tools of the trade, sex,
drugs, lame rock and roll, alcohol, hip hop,
sporting events, cars, TV, newspapers, bling and the other bullshit they stuff down our
throats on a daily basis. The real revolution is
all about throwing up the middle finger to this
fucked up way of life and getting back to our original, blissful spiritual nature. What became clear to me early on was that punk failed in
its mission of revolution for one reason it offered no solutions. I been on stage playing
for 20,000 screaming fans and all that bullshit that happens, fame, adoration, distinction, money whatever the fuck and honestly, the most peaceful time of my life where I just felt the most satisfied is when I was living as a monk. (dramatic music) All right, welcome to
the spiritual world bro. - Wow.
- Look at this. (calm ethnic music) So this is Brother Ryan
I was telling you about, one of my great mentors on this-- - Good to see you. - Journey.
- Brian. - Pleasure, John to me is
like a modern day warrior, he's on the fricking battlefield, you know what I'm saying and his weapon is music and lyrics. He realises what our
journey has been together is that there's an underlying
divine spiritual principal in life that most people
aren't in touch with. We want to have to permanent happiness, but we're trying to do it
in this temporary vehicle, so that's a dichotomy,
there's frustration, it's an oxymoron, wealth,
fame, chasing women, chasing men, these
things will never really satisfy the heart.
- And when it's not satisfied, then we think this drug, this intoxication, this person, we're looking for stuff
outside of ourselves. - We're right here probably
in the highest concentration in the pursuit of material
things in the world. - This the king of maya, this
city is the king of maya. - What is maya? - Maya means illusion, that which is not. Unless one clears the mirror of the mind, the material world will
always frustrates you, it's-- - This place is two blocks
away from where I used to live, Avenue A and Housestead
and I'm running around, going after more, going
after more, going after more. - Sure, it's not about bank accounts. It's not about how good we look, the material body, because without this, this falls apart, you gotta have this and you gotta have this. We don't ever confront ourselves and turn our consciousness
and energy inward to really search and cleanse. That's what this process is about and that's why I brought you here today. It wasn't like to convert
you to this or anything. Your path may be different than this, but it's all the same knowledge
that's being put out there and to the degree you surrender to it, to that degree you beat down your demons. So how do I do it every single day? Because I'd be out there
choking people on the streets if I didn't chant, trust I have-- - Direct experience of that. - Trust me, so when you mix the training, the philosophy, the meditation, the yoga, it's all meant to
improve our consciousness and that's where A. C.
Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada came from India and he
came to this neighbourhood to that tree and just sat out there and starting chanting.
- Came to the-- - With seven dollars in his--
- Lower East Side. - Seven dollars and a case
of books, nothing else. (horn blows)
This is great. This is great. We bow down out of respect. (bells chiming)
(chanting) (cheering)
(chanting) (speaking foreign language) (praying in foreign language) After two years of crack, cocaine and pills and alcohol, when
I went into the temple, I said if you don't let me stay here I'm gonna be dead and they let me move in and I saw the pictures,
I just uncontrollably starting sobbing, it was like a magnet. I was like wow this is these are windows to the spiritual world. I took what Prabhupada was teaching and I put it in the street vernacular and everybody took to it. Cro-Mag's first album The Age of Quarrel, that album would not exist--
- All of those lyrics from the vedas?
- Dude the whole album. - You know what we
really need in this world is more artists that are
putting out uplifting messages to the world, that's what needed. You're doing it through this television, this London Real show, you're
reaching a lot of people. And you have that calling man. - I don't even know how
I got here as far as that whole journey I just was it's almost like I didn't know each step was getting me closer to
putting these messages out and now that I think about it even this black hole I fell
into two blocks away from here I think is part of the journey I had to go that low to
realise that that wasn't important to me, I had to almost die here. From then to start London Real, when it wasn't a business, it was nothing. Everyone was like what's wrong with you? All my banker buddies
laughing at me in London and like what the fuck are you doing? Then it's just like then
it's just slowly slowly finding, trying to get
these messages out to people which ultimately is
what this is all about. - All this comes back to
the fundamental question. What is the meaning of human life? What is the meaning of human life? - Just ask somebody
that, what is life about? And see what they say. What is the human life about,
what is the purpose of life? If they don't have an answer,
which most people don't or it's a really dumb one, then that tells you something right there about where we're heading as a society, that's why everybody's
so unhappy, nobody sits. Sit down and talk philosophy, talk about something with
some substance to it, not just all this idol
chatter that's out there and all this stuff that's
meant to dumb people down. ♪ I live in this Babylon ♪ ♪ I live in this Babylon ♪ ♪ It will not be too long now ♪ ♪ It will not to be too long ♪ ♪ I say my people are starving ♪ ♪ But your money's running ♪ This is the thing that
can fuck athletes up, you could break a spoke, your
wheel could go out of true. You have to learn how to
fix a flat, it's up to you, you gotta carry cartridges. What's up?
- What's going on? - This is the one and only.
- Hi, I'm Brian. - Samantha Murphy.
- Hi, nice to meet you. - Samantha Murphy.
- I've done 10 Iron Mans and two Olympics and
marathons without a coach. Since I've been working with you for what? Two months.
- Two months, yep. - My fucking times are going down and I have the watch and
she's logged into my account. - What's the watch? - I have it for you today, this
watch is going to track GPS, it's also going to track your heart rate. We're gonna run some
tests for your heart rate so we can get an authentic reading of who you are as an athlete. So John has totally different heart rate and what we want to do--
- It's the crack. (laughs) I'll leave you to it to do it. Make me proud.
- Got it, we got it. - I know, all right. - All right, we'll see
you John, thank you. - Before we get started, I just kind of want to get to know you a little bit, so tell me about you, tell me about your
background as an athlete. - So as an athlete,
well I'm not an athlete I wouldn't say, I do try to move everyday but I do a lot of short
bursts cardio stuff. I lift weights, I don't do
any kind of endurance swim, or a long distance run and
I haven't been on a bike in 20 years.
- One of the things just based on just that
small amount of information that you gave me that's very different is that this is a long day. This isn't just going to
work out for 40 minutes. I don't give a shit if you
can run a half marathon. I want you to run a half
marathon off of a bike and that's a very different animal. - I got 90 days to prepare for this-- - Yeah, it's not normally
what I would want or do I'd actually want a year. - A year?
- Yeah, a year. - All right, ready?
- Yeah, I'm gonna change. - Let's do it.
- Okay, cool. (dramatic music) Some funny shoes you
got me wearing Samantha. - So this is like the quintessential I am not a triathlete outfit you have on. - Oh, okay. - I just want to kind of
run you through the gear so this is so new to you. - [Brian] Okay, what do I do with these? - Start to spin it up, what we're really gonna focus on today is your heart rate,
you're gonna just focus on getting this number as high as you can, but we'll never go above 200. - 200 okay.
- If we get to 200, I know CPR, we're gonna go
five, four, three, two, one. Hit it. (dramatic music) Little bit of bend in
the elbow and just relax. - This is my relax I think. - Okay, you're focusing on
the fact that you're about to go to battle right now, how are you gonna confront the pain? How do you feel? - It's a good burn in the
quadriceps, solid burn. - Okay. This is where you start to really feel it, the fight is going to start. (heavy breathing) So the pressure becomes how
bad do you want this, right? So think about that, think about something that's going to drive
you when it really hurts to work harder, not give
in, whether that's someone you want to compete against,
whether that's some kind of demon you want to fight. (dramatic music)
(heavy breathing) Channel that really intense determination that you have, Brian. Be really present in the pain. (heavy breathing) Negative thoughts are gonna come, push them out and just stay
focused right on the moment. (heavy breathing)
(beeping) The mind always shuts down the body. The body always has more to give. Smooth up that peddle stroke. Okay, two minutes, two minutes, it has to happen right now okay. Here we go, all I need you to do for the next 50 seconds is
to hold right where you are and we're gonna push that last bit out, we know you're feeling it, but you got it. (heavy breathing) That's great. Yeah, yeah so this next minute Brian I want you to focus any
kind of negative energy, anyone who's ever said
you couldn't do this or doubted you in this project or process, let's do this, use that
energy, channel it. Good. 45 seconds, this is it. You have absolutely no chance left to make it go harder,
so either you do it now or you've wasted your time. (heavy breathing) I want you think about
your children right, you're doing this as a role model to show them what you're capable of. You will absolutely not back down because you would not
want them to back down. 10 seconds, come on. Don't give in. Four, I know you want to give
in, don't do it, you got it. You got it, you got it,
two, one and done, relax. (heavy breathing)
(dramatic music) Let's get him some water. - I got to see some old demons. - How was that?
- It's fun to see them. - (laughs) It's great, here. Okay, so talk to me a little bit. - I was getting lots of flashbacks. I feel like I was almost
going to cry there. - That's good. - Minute five, I'm just
trying to think of the people I don't want to let down. It's funny when you ask me who's going who wants me to fail and who's
always told me I can fail, that doesn't motivate me.
- That doesn't motivate you, okay.
- When I think about me failing and all of
the people I let down and when I let myself
down, that's what really for good or bad makes me motivated. - Okay, so that's good,
that's a good lesson for me as a coach, right, right? - Yeah, and I'm in New
York where I failed a lot so that's what was going through my mind. - Already right, like huge
wave of emotion, right? As soon as you start to push
into that next threshold and now you can totally see
this is why John does this. - Because he likes to cry? - (laughs) But if you never push yourself in life like this then
you kind of miss out on so much stuff. - I'm not exactly sure why
John is doing all this. I don't really know, but
I'm glad he's doing it. - Yeah, yeah, I mean John is like (sighs) he's a teacher. He actually likes to teach people. Okay, five minutes and then
we're going to go again. (large boom resounds) (calm electronic music) - In the vedas from India it says there are many planes of existence, different levels of
consciousness if you will and according to what we do in this life, we associate with beings on those planes. The yoga and meditation
bring positive gains and auras of light and
positivity around you. Drugs and alcohol brings
beings of negativity, destruction and darkness to your life. We can choose to live a
positive and creative life, or we can make our lives a living hell. It's up to us which
world we want to live in. (dramatic piano music) (buzzer buzzes)
(door creaks) What's up brother man?
- Yo, what's going on man? - I just got off the phone
with Samantha you know and she kind of told me you had you know a cleansing kind of
moment at the bike shop. - Honestly man, being in New York is hard and you take me through
talk in Square Park and I walk around the East Village and for me I see failure, my failure and it just came up in a big way. - I don't want to push you in that regard, but as your buddy and inviting you and I think we got tight, we're developing a dope friendship and telling people what
the fuck is in here, dude that's risk, that's
fear, that's we're here to do in New York is to face all of that. You know how hard it was for me to admit that I was sexually abused
as a kid for fucking years? When I wrote my book I
would get to that point where I was talking about the foster home and out of fear and embarrassment
I would skip over that. And then I went to Robert
McKee's story seminar and said Mr. McKee as
far as our protagonist having things and secrets done to him of shit that happened
as a kid and he goes, "Stop right there," he goes, "Child abuse "is the number one cliche in film "to get people to have
empathy for a character "we could otherwise give two shits about. "It's not what happens to somebody. "It's what they do as a result of it." You need to do what I did to really make this whole trip worth it. - I don't know how to tell this story, but it's probably two stories. It's this kid that grew up
in California, nice family, suburbia nothing like
what you went through, what you grew up with, went to MIT with these
crazy, smart-ass guys, competed with the best,
got straight As there and it was just, it was on and then boom recruited to Wall Street, because they wanted those engineers and those mathematicians to go down there and I'm gonna be the
millionaire, the 10 millionaire, I want to be an MD before I'm 30 and I'm hanging out with all the guys and all these expectations on me from me. - [Brian] So you got that
overachiever mentality? - Yeah, yeah, big time. The other side of the story is Brian starts drinking,
starts to like drinking, starts drinking every night. And I don't know if it was
to get away from my own brain because my own brain was always
like that's not good enough, that's not good enough, all As, fuck that. Next you gotta do better, so
I get here to this crazy ass city and I see my buddies passing me by and I see myself not getting
to where I want to be and it's all relative, but
I've failed in this city and I think as I started to see that I started just to go more
and more into the addiction and then it got worse and then the drugs come out and at the same time now that I look back I guess I was doing the
wrong things anyways. It was all about me and my bank account. - For the wrong reasons.
- For the wrong reasons, but I couldn't see that then. And then one night my
buddy pulls out heroin and says yo check this shit
out, you heard about this right? I'm like yeah, I guess so, what's up? Let's do this. I never really felt like
I gave a fuck about me or my life and so yeah that was a turning point. Honestly John I just needed to I just needed to take a break from me and then one night in the East Village I
shipped in some heroin and did a bunch of fucking lines and then I stopped breathing. - Wow. - Yeah and I woke up in
the hospital the next day. My mom and dad could
have gotten a phone call like your son's dead. They'd be like what the fuck my son's a fucking
successful Wall Street banker and he's an MIT graduate, what
the fuck you talking about? A heroin overdose you know?
- Yeah. - And here I am that's me and I didn't change my behaviour one bit. And so I kept at it. It just honestly got worse from there. I was so lonely and I used to walk out to top at Square Park,
I had no job, no girl, I wouldn't talk to anyone
for like five days straight, I wouldn't us my voice
and I would sit under that Hare Krishna tree and just be like what the fuck am I going
to do with my life? I just let down so many
fucking people John, I just burned my buddy and the girl. I think it's just me. I just fucking let myself down. I almost killed myself like (sighs) I think I'm mad at myself somehow. (low key electronic music)
(siren blares) - [Brian] What was the turning point? - I mean that was the
bottom, I had nothing left in this city, I had no
human that wanted anything to do with me and I just knew
I had to get the fuck out. - What made you pick London? - I had been to London
before and I just knew I knew that city and I was like maybe somebody there will give me a job. - So you just went there with?
- Nothing. I e-mailed--
- Nothing set up, nothing, you just got the fuck out? - I e-mailed some people and said could anyone give me a job? - And I landed in London
on January 2nd or 3rd, 2002 and that was where I
started to rebuild my life and I actually never
touched that shit again. I don't know how, I was really fragile, if you were to see me, a breeze could have probably knocked me over, but I got a job and I just literally
started rebuilding myself and it took me years. - You clawed yourself out of a deep dish. - I've never talked about this, and I mean my girl doesn't really know, my parents don't know, you
know when that shit happens, I'm grateful to be alive, so every day, it's an important day. - Having gratitude that
you're fucking above dirt, you should fucking thank your lucky stars, gratitude equals attitude. (low key electronic music) When you develop a spiritual power, nothing in the material
world could touch you. Look at the lotus, where does it exist? It comes out of the stem and
it exists above dirty water and it's never affected. Be very fucking diligent in your life and that comes through sedona,
sedona is your practise every day, whether it's yoga, meditation or whatever it is you do
the physical challenges that come with doing an Iron Man or you know to me that's
a spiritual process too, that's what left the old John
Joseph McGowan in the past. Did I slip up? Fuck yeah, I did, did I give up? Fuck no. (low key electronic music) Yeah, woo. I pulled you up on this
fucking bridge for a reason. This is like a painting
of your fucking past, Wall Street where you made all your money, here where you ruined
your fucking life almost, it's time for you to man up, to once and for all tell your mind who the fuck is boss, I
need a fucking answer, what's it gonna be? Are you gonna make me race by myself or are we crossing the
finish line together? - Fuck it man, let's do this, all right. - Yes, yes, that's what I want to hear. That's an investment in
my time and your time to make this shit happen. (calm piano music) - They say forgiveness
can't change the past, but it will determine your future. I made a lot of mistakes in this city, but if I can cross that finish line, I can finally forgive myself. It's hard to imagine that 16 years ago, I took this same flight alone nearly dead. (calm piano music) The future truly is unwritten. (calm piano music) (dramatic music) - I want to push you to
become an endurance machine, from what little I know of you so far, it's intense, so we want
to draw out that intensity, we want to battle some
mental demons for a long time and not just get tired out
and slam it for a few minutes. Another huge piece of this whole thing is that shit's going to
come that we didn't plan for on race day and you're gonna have to adapt and you cannot get
negative because negativity never, ever, ever works out, you know you can have a
healthy dose of anger, but Iron Man is literally that consistency and adaptability and if you
can nail those two things, you'll have the race of your life. - Okay, rocking the first bike ride here, I've got the heart rate
monitor going on right now and got the new watch, so
I'm gonna track my time, track my heart rate, bust out 55 minutes and see where it goes and send
all my info to my trainer. That's the plan baby, let's do this. (calm electronic music) - There's gonna be some
times when you're not gonna be comfortable and you're gonna have to deal with that. - Oh man, now off to the treadmill. (calm electronic music) I hit the treadmill after the bike and I was like I got this,
because I biked for an hour, I hit the treadmill and I was like, wow, legs feel like jelly. (calm electronic music) (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (calm electronic music) - Hey.
- Hello, how are you? - Brian, I think I need a bike. (calm electronic music) This is the single most
important piece of technology I need for this race so I'm in your hands. (calm electronic music) It makes it very real to see this bike. It just kind of makes it hit home. - [Samantha] You're used to
running, you're a newer cyclist. You're not used to suffering that and we're gonna teach you to
suffer really hard on the bike. (calm electronic music) Did you get your bike ride in? - I got on the bike outside
for the very first time. (calm hip hop music) But it was just really around
the neighbourhood here. I didn't get any time in
and that was just because filming so--
- Time has to happen. - How long is it gonna take
me to finish this thing? - I don't have quite enough data yet. I need to see some solid
bike rides on an actual bike, but I'm hoping somewhere
between a 630 rate or less. The time is irrelevant if
you're not mentally there. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (making baby noises) (making circus noises) - Ta da! Baby, how do you feel about
me doing this competition? - I do worry a little bit. - Why are you worried? - I do worry about the swimming part, it sounds very intense, 3,000
people jumping into the water. (baby crying)
Don't die on me. - [Brian] Don't die? Why don't you want me to die on you? - I'm not done with you yet. - Baby, you'll be the best
looking widow on the block. - That's not funny.
- It's a little funny. - That's not funny.
- How come you smiled then? And is the only thing that worries you, the drowning, I mean
I'm sorry, the swimming? (laughs) Baby, how's it feel cooking for a vegan? - Well, it's a challenge,
it's something I haven't done before, but I know how
to cook so I just find a ways around it it's a
completely new territory. - Baby, thank you so much
for going plant-based while I'm going plant-based,
not that you have a choice and Kayden thank you
for going plant-based. See look baby, he's so plant-based, he wants to eat the outside of the orange. The morning breakfast with the vegan egg. - [John] No meat, baby, no more meats. - What's for dinner? Oh my gosh, this is so good. It's so good, baby it's so good. If you're lucky enough
to have an amazing woman to prepare stuff like
this and leave it for you when you come home late
from London Real Studios, then you're gold. - I working waitress, and
it was just too realistic experience, how it's like
a whole industry we built around animals and the
exploitation about animals and there's a way around
it, nobody has to die. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (dramatic music)
(treadmill thrumming) - Iron Man training is no joke. It's all about putting
maximum effort in every day. (heavy breathing) - We should talk about
what maximum effort means, because I think sometimes people think maximum effort means going
all out or balls to the wall every single day. We're talking day in
and day out consistency. - All right, it's zero
degrees out in London. - If you're pushing
yourself as hard as you can every single day, especially
if you're a master athlete, you're gonna be wrecked
and you're gonna miss the next day and you're gonna
miss metrics on the bike and you're gonna be
destroyed in the water. - Swimming for two kilometres straight and I hear nightmares about like it's like a mosh pit in there and there's hands flying and also people have drowned before, right? - So not drowning, what's happening is they're having a heart attack. You know just to kind
of throw John into this he's good at the sport
because he's good at suffering for a long amount of time and it kind of like taking
punches and just going with them. Last question is how
much do I have to pay you to beat John Joseph at this race? - (laughs) Truthfully the answer to that is I don't want you to worry about that. It'll just screw your head, but do this, when you wake up and
want to miss a workout, remind yourself he's not
missing a workout, okay. - (heavy breathing) No excuses baby. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (dramatic music) This is London Real, I am Brian Rose. My guest today is Charles Poloquin, the world-renowned strength coach who has trained over 800 Olympic athletes across 23 different events,
you've been teaching for over 40 years and many consider you to be the most successful
strength coach ever. Charles, welcome to London Real. - Thank you very much for inviting Brian. - I've just been challenged
to run an Iron Man in 90 days on 100% plant-based diet. Have you trained vegan
athletes that you think can perform on that diet if
they eat correctly or not? Come on Charles, give it to me straight. - Okay, no, impossible. You don't see a power athlete
ever that's been vegan. I never coach one of my Olympics
athletes that was a vegan. I've seen people go vegan and get kicked out of the national team because of a lack of performance. You look at British
boxer who turned vegan, he tore his calf while giving a punch. - [Brian] David Haye, well
that could be a one off. - No, what happens is that--
- You can actually get enough grammes of protein
via plant sources, but-- - Yeah, but you should get
quality protein in my opinion, I mean if you're a stock broker, maybe you could be a vegan. You're a nerd--
- What about an endurance athlete like Rich Roll
who does ultra marathons and stuff who's on a
complete plant-based diet? - He's an oddity, right, so
there's different genotypes that could do better on
it, but humans are not a fairly large piece of humans
are not made to be vegans. - They'll of course come back and say our intestines are twelve
times as long as our body and we don't have claws
and we don't have fangs, so we're not supposed to be meat eaters. - We only have one stomach,
okay, like all carnivores. - Obviously, I've been hanging
out with a lot of vegans. - Yeah, yeah, but there's
two German studies that show that people who choose veganism have lower IQs and yes, it's true and then the other thing is that people who go vegan lower their IQs. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (calm acoustic music) (blender rumbling) (beeping) - Yo, what's going on?
- What the fuck? - Dude, I'm a little
concerned about the diet. - All right, that's what I
want to tell you right now. - No, I have this guy
and here on London Real. - What was that guy's
name who said impossible? - So this guy, his
name's Charles Poloquin, he's trained like 800 Olympians. He's been around for a long time. He's an old school strength guy and he's like Brian, you can't
do this without eating meat. - Bullshit, bullshit, bull fucking shit. I'm doing it. You see what I'm doing? I'm 56 motherfucking years old. Impossible is a word
in a fool's dictionary. He needs to shut the fuck up because there's people doing
it and they're crushing it. Look at Rich Roll, look
at Brendan Brasier, look at guys who hold world
weight-lifting records. The world's top athletes
are going plant-based and they're kicking motherfucking ass. - Okay, folks, about three
and a half hours in here. I'm supposed to do 70 kgs, but kms I mean, but I'm going for
motherfucking 90, fuck it. It's been raining, my
feet have been frozen for at least an hour and a half, but I don't give a fuck, I'm feeling good. My guest today today is Rich Roll, the American author, public speaker, plant-based nutrition advocate and vegan ultra endurance athlete who Men's Health named as one of the 25 fittest men in the world. - It's a lifestyle that
checks all of those boxes. It's better for the environment. It's better for your health. It's certainly better for the animals and you can go out and kick ass in any athletic pursuit you desire. It seems like this is a new chapter where you're getting comfortable sharing the heroin use, you're married and your wife didn't even know. - Of course not. That's a horrible,
shameful part of my past. I had tried to write
some things in the past and try to think am I ever going
to explain this to someone, but I couldn't think of a good reason and then with this whole process, it really came out naturally. - How did she take it? - Well, I can't even confess this to her. I need to make the episode of Iron Mind to confess it to her. (calm piano music) Want to show you this and
then we can talk about it. We can talk about it a lot more. - Show me. - You want to see it?
- Yes, I want to see it. - Okay, here we go. (calm piano music) What do you think? - My God, baby. This made made you who you are. You're so strong, you're so strong. I'm very proud of you. Hey, you did good, you did good. - How is that good? - Yes, it's very good. - How? It's a pretty rough thing
to tell everybody about. - There's nothing to be ashamed of. You're not seeing what I'm seeing. - What are you seeing? - It had to happen to
make you who you are. Yeah. - Thanks babe. - Heroin huh?
- Yeah, heroin. - Yeah, okay.
- You're not impressed? You want to slap me?
- Yeah. - Come on slap me.
- Okay. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (calm piano music) - Oh, man, feeling a lot
of gratitude these days. Grateful that my 46-year-old
carcass can keep this up. Grateful that I had
people like John Joseph and Samantha in my life. Grateful that I had the
whole team at London Real putting out these amazing messages, grateful to be alive,
grateful for my family, my beautiful sons, my beautiful daughter. (calm piano music) There's more to this Iron Man competition than endurance, there's
more to it than running and biking and swimming and I think when we really push the physical,
we get into the mental, which gets us into the spiritual and most of us got a
lot of shit bottled up in that cranium folks. (calm piano music) I can already see myself
crossing that finish line, you know it feels amazing, I'm thinking about all the
people that got me there. I'm thinking about all the
people from my past 20 years ago that I fucked over all the
things I did wrong in my life, all the things I did right in my life, all the love, everything. (calm piano music) I'm gonna finish this thing and make sure I finish no matter what. I think that's true about life too man, you've gotta finish it,
you don't let stupid shit get in the way like heroin
overdoses and dumb shit, you finish, you know you get it done. Let's finish life you know. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (heavy breathing)
(calm electronic music) Felt like absolute
fucking dog shit actually. I'm obviously pissed off. I gotta go film an episode,
I gotta prepare for a guest and honestly I just don't want to deal with this bullshit right now. (heavy breathing)
(tense electronic music) I can't lie, yesterday was a shitty day and I sucked to be honest. The past four days I
just feel over trained, I just feel really run down, I can't seem to eat my way out of it or sleep my way out of it. This weekend was just manic and the schedule around
here around London Real has been manic and the home
schedule has been manic and my swim teacher looked at me and he said, what the
hell is wrong with you, you look sick, I want to do this race, I think I can do this race,
but at times like this, it doesn't make me want to train. (beeping)
(dramatic music) - What I need you to work
on more than anything is how you deal with frustration. When it doesn't go perfectly, because that's gonna
be reality on race day and I can see that
sometimes you get angry. And anger can be a really
powerful motivator, but anger can also stop
you dead in your tracks. What are my coping mechanisms for when things are frustrating? And you already have to
know what those things are because I can imagine
that in life if things get frustrating you had to figure out how to deal with it without being angry. And if not, then you
probably should do it know. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) Okay, oh man, okay, just
finished my T2 transition, god damn that's hard man. It feels like my heart
really hurts right now. Oh fuck, oh fuck me. It would be great to consult a doctor, maybe have a look at my blood to see what's going on, I mean I just jumped into this diet, I don't really know what I'm doing, but who knows if I'm missing something? So that's a concern. I'm a little curious what the results are and by the look of your face, I'm a little worried. - Well, I think there's this misconception often in this sporting
or even well-being world that actually endurance
sports and Iron Man is good for you when actually we know it's really not, so depending
on what you want to achieve, whether you want to live
well longer as opposed performance at all
costs, I think there has to be a balance somewhere
so something has to give. - What do you see when
you look at my blood? - This little thing is
a biological adaptation to get you to conserve energy, okay, it's trying to get you to slow down. - Should I be worried here? - B12 is the main thing
you need to supplement on a plant-based diet, even
supplementation doesn't work, so the way to bypass this you
can get your vitamin B12 shot. So right, alcohol wipes,
insulin syringe, turn around. And then you go in slightly,
little bit of a sting. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) My guest today is Dr. Gabor Mate, who specialises in neurology,
psychology and psychiatry as well as the study and
treatment of addiction. You spent 12 years in
downtown Vancouver in clinics treating patients challenged
by hardcore drug use and you've used the
plant medicine ayahuasca for addiction treatment, Dr.
Mate welcome to London Real. - Pleasure to be here. - You were really in the
trenches in downtown Vancouver and you saw what I think
most people don't see. I think we see the Hollywood version of what addiction looks like or we see what we'd like to think it is, but you saw what it really is and I was wondering if you could tell us what you saw and what you learned. - So addiction is
manifested in anyy behaviour that a person craves,
find temporary pleasure, or relief in, but then
experiences negative consequences in the long
term and doesn't give up. I said any behaviour, I didn't
say drugs, could be drugs. So I'm gonna ask you now,
by that definition Brian, have you had an addictive
behaviour in your life? - Yes, many. - What did you like about it? What did it for you? - It gave me temporary relief. - From?
- From the pain I was feeling, usually related to interacting
with my fellow humans or how I felt doing that. - Okay, so you had the emotional pain that was triggered for you by
interaction with other people. - And maybe even being myself as well. - You weren't comfortable
in your own skin? - I think so, yeah. Okay, fair enough, in other words, the addiction wasn't your problem. Your problem is that you
have a lot of emotional pain, you didn't know what to do with it, so really what it was is
that the addiction came along to help you solve a problem,
you had no other solutions for it at the time and that's
the case for all addictions. So why do people use, why do
people engage in addictions? Because they have deep emotional problems they don't have the means
to resolve on their own. - I was a drinker and a drugger who used violence to numb
the pain I had inside. I knew I had to get off this
train headed for disaster, but I didn't know how. Every day it slowly ate away at me and every day I numbed with
more alcohol, drugs and fights. - So let me go a little deeper
on what I was thinking about when it came to my addictions. I think I was getting away from me, who I think was driving me
to be the ultimate best. I know that this was a stupid behaviour. It was a temporary fix that I usually paid for dearly the next day and repeatedly paid for
and the more I did it, the more I think my self-esteem
dropped a little bit, because I couldn't
control this about myself and it wasn't until I did this show and I had my first ayahuasca ceremony and I was crying so much that the tears were going down my eyes and dripping down off my ears and I still remember the tears dripping off my ears and I was going back, I was visualising the seven-year-old boy and this was me when my parents divorced and this was this little
boy that was building up all these walls around him
because he had been hurt so much and so for me it was
like no one's getting in the rest of my life, and maybe
was it my attempting to excel in the world was to show the
world that they needed me, so that's maybe why I went to MIT and got the job in banking,
these kinds of things. - Well, it's an archetypical story. So first of all you're hurt as a child, and then you have to compensate for it, because children interpret the world in those narcissistic
ways that whatever happens is because of me so you failed
to make your parents happy and of course you're
uncomfortable with yourself, that's a lot to deal with. Then you just developed this idea that I've gotta do it
all by myself, on my own. - I think I had a self-destructive nature, just because of what happened
to me in my childhood. I always felt inadequate you
know that I didn't matter. I'm that overachieving
personality too, and why is that? Because there's an
inadequacy that's there. - So first of all, you're hurt as a child and then you have to compensate for it. This is where the hunger comes in, you can never get enough because by doing you're never satisfied when your hunger is about being and not having been
accepted just for being. - I did a lot of fucked up shit that I had to forgive myself for. I was a fucking liar, a cheater, a thief, every bad quality that could
exist in a person I had. I always knew I was capable
of taking someone's life and it scared me, because
people told me that, they're like you're gonna
fucking kill somebody or get killed, you
would not have liked me. I didn't like myself. I have a lot of work I've done on myself out on that bike or in that
fucking pool or out on runs. I don't know what it is
about this fucking sport, but it attracts people that really need to do deep work on themselves. And every race is emotional,
every race the last mile of the run I have tears in my eyes because all of my past is
playing in my head like a movie and I'm like fuck you you didn't win you motherfuckers, you tried to fucking destroy
me, but you didn't win. Look what I'm out here doing. (hard rock music) The future is unwritten. It's what we do today that determines how the fuck that
future's going to end up. That's why I'm out on the bike every day. There's a lot of discovery of yourself found in the pain that
you willingly undertake. I went from iron bars to Iron Man, I went from jail and everything else, smoking crack on the Lower East Side. That's the power of the PMA,
positive mental attitude. (hard rock music) - The way the world is,
and even the way you are, it's not your fault, it's not a fault. Just accept yourself and you don't have to work
so hard to be like them, you're okay, just relax kid and a lot of life do come to you, you don't have to force it. - Listen up.
(crowd cheering) If you all ain't seen this documentary I'm doing called Iron Mind it's about this brother that kicked heroin almost died and now because
of positive mental attitude, he's racing with me, I need
you all to do something real quick before we start this next song, can you do that for me? (crowd cheering) My man's name is Brian,
on the count of three, we're going to scream,
"Get that shit, Brian!" Are you ready?
- Yeah! - One, two, three. Get that shit, Brian.
- Get that shit, Brian. - This one's goes out to you Brian. (hard rock music) - Oh man, and that's done
folks, 100 km. (laughs) Chattanooga, I'm fucking ready for you. (clock ticking)
(boom resounds) (calm piano music) You gonna be okay while I'm gone? - Yes, I'm gonna be okay,
we're gonna keep in touch. - Okay, are you mad you're not coming? - Yes.
- Why? - Because I wanted to be there. - Baby I know you want to be there, but I think this is something that racers they gotta do themselves. I've never done anything like this before. I've never been in ever
like a competition like this with all of these people,
it's gonna be really hectic, I just need to get in the zone, do you understand why I gotta do it alone? - Yes. I still want to be there because it's important
and I want to be there when you're crossing the line and if something goes wrong I'll feel pretty much helpless here. - Well I understand you
want to be there babe, but I gotta do this myself, I gotta go slay the dragon myself. - I just want to be more
in control of things and now I'm not, but I
understand that you have to do it then John and Samantha will be there and you'll be in good hands, but I'm just I'm anxious
about it, that's all. - You really worried about me? - Yeah. I'm gonna be happy when
you come home with a smile. - Okay, I will, promise, I'm
gonna home alive with a smile. - Promise?
- Yes, I promise. And I'm finishing.
- Okay. (calm piano music) Papa's going to go out, we
need to say goodbye to papa. - Bye bye, everyone--
- Bye bye papa. - Baby is he upset that I'm leaving? - Yeah, that's how I feel. - You're okay? Okay, all right, all right,
you have both of them, you can get both of them, you sure? - Okay.
- Okay? - Yeah.
- All right bye. - Bye. (boom resounds) (calm acoustic music) (rock music) (folk music) ♪ Who's been here since I've been gone ♪ ♪ Old Injun with a nightcap on ♪ ♪ She pick cotton, she drink corn ♪ ♪ Old Injun with a nightcap on ♪ ♪ Great big catfish
you gotta go see them ♪ ♪ We have them in Chattanooga
in the fish museum ♪ ♪ Saddle up a grey, better get away ♪ - Brian Rose, you made it. - How are you man?
- How are you bro? What's love?
- Good to see you man. - You good?
- Wow, talk about it on the Brooklyn Bridge and here you are. - It's happening, right (rock music) - It's hot.
- I know, it's unbelievably hot.
- Oh my gosh. - And it's only gonna be worse, yeah. - This is not New York, we're a long way. - I know, hello, hello.
- Good to see you, good to see you.
- I know, good to see you. - How are you?
- I'm great, I'm great. - Yeah?
- Yeah. So the biggest part
about racing in the heat is you start cooling yourself
while you're on the bike so you can try and keep
your temperature down as low as possible, so that by the time you hit the run you're a
little bit ahead of the game and really what you have to
think about with the heat is I'm one with the heat, everyone is going to be in the heat, the elements are the same for everyone, the people who are going to do better are the people who don't
mentally crack in the heat. (rock music) (calm acoustic music) - So what is the plan today? - So the plan today is that we're gonna do what's called course
recon, we're gonna drive the bike course so you get a feel for what the roads look like. (calm acoustic music) I think it's really
important to remind yourself to stay present in the
practise that I'm doing this. - John, what do you think
about when you're out here? - The gratitude, man, where
I came from fucking streets and drugs and incarceration and more drugs and violence and then I start settling in into my happy place man I chant. - When I get in a tough place, I think about things like
how hard and how relentless my daughter had to be
to learn how to walk, that image of falling
down and getting back up. - If you hear banjo
music and they're going (mimicking banjo music) do not go in the woods in that area. (calm acoustic music) (dramatic music) (crickets chirping)
(dramatic music) - [John] And in the morning,
take a little time to yourself, 15, 20 minutes do some meditation calm your breathing, give thanks for the journey, that's what I do every race morning, I chant my prayers for protection and I would just play that the
(speaking foreign language). (monks speaking foreign language) You're going in the elements man. (thunder claps)
You've got the water. You've got the road, you got the wind. (thunder claps)
(dramatic music) He protects souls on the path. (car alarm beeps)
(tense electronic music) - [Brian's Wife] So strong,
it's part of who you are. It's your story. - [John] It's time for you to man up, to once and for all tell your
mind who the fuck is boss. (dramatic electronic music) - [Samantha] If you never push
yourself in life like this, then you kind of miss out. (dramatic electronic music) - [John] You have a
worldwide audience right now that's inspired by you, so
that's why you must finish. - You'll be coming through
that finisher shoot, you want to pat all these
things that you're proud about. It seems so intense and now it's gone. You'll never get that back. You'll never be able to hold on to that exact moment again (dramatic electronic music) Brian and John really crushed it. You can see that Brian swam 30.50, that's a super solid swim. (dramatic electronic music) (hard rock music) It's very, very hot and
that will be the battle that they're going to face today. (hard rock music) He's halfway through the race on the bike. They're riding almost the exact same pace. I've just gotten
something from the course. Unfortunately, we just heard
that John has broken his chain. (dramatic music)
(clock ticking) Reality is once you
clock over the halfway, you have this kind of big feeling of okay, I'm over halfway done,
but then those miles from 30 to 40 to 50 can
be a little bit tough. (clock ticking)
(heart beating) (clock ticking)
(dramatic music) John must have gotten his bike fixed. He's past 45 miles on the
bike, so he's in it to win it. - Nice track. (dramatic music)
(clock ticking) - [Samantha] This is really where the suffer starts to be honest, because it's hot, and you're close but you're never close enough. - Come on, let's go. (dramatic electronic music) - You're doing really well Brian, okay, just keep doing what you're doing, make sure you're taking
in enough ice and water, you've got this, you're
doing awesome, all right, okay, I'll see you soon, you look great. (dramatic music)
(crowd cheering) (dramatic music) (heavy breathing)
(heart beating) (hard rock music) (heart beating)
(clock ticking) - [Announcer] Brian Rose. (crowd cheering)
(triumphant music) (announcer talking)
(people talking) (calm piano music) - Brian! Brian Rose, you're at the
finish line, brother, come here. - Oh, oh. I was thinking about you on that race man. - You used to tell me you have just faced a bunch of demons, this journey for you is a multi-year journey,
this represents a pinnacle about letting people down
and now you have inspired with this journey and being vulnerable, lifting up tens of thousands
of people including me, how do you feel? - I feel great, man. I was always going to finish this thing. It's hot, that run was crazy, but there's so many people here behind me all around the world, it's been a real tough
journey for me, emotional, but it's just been absolutely incredible. - Just walk me through the
race, what was it like for you? Were you nervous, I mean
you've never done this before. - You know I never done it before, I just try to remain calm you know, I was kind of calm all
week, which is weird. I put in a lot of training. The swim once I got on
there, it felt good. The bike, I did my best
time ever, under three hours and then my legs starting cramping up, my hamstrings and I had a slow run, although I think I beat John Joseph and so the run was just brutal, my stomach was really
hurting, but I didn't stop, I just didn't stop, I saw people walking and I was like I'm not walking. I made myself that promise. I got a three page e-mail last night from Madan Panya saying
leave it all on the course and so that's why what I did on that bike. I was like you know what, fuck this, I'm leaving it all on there, so yeah it's been a great
journey, it's been awesome. Whoa! (screams) - You should be so proud of yourself, breaking six hours in
this heat is incredible. Hey there.
- What's up buddy? - God man, how you doing?
- Hi there. - Fuck.
- Good race. - That was no joke man. - You did it, you did it, now we're signing up for a full. - John.
- Thank you, no problem. - We love Samantha
Murphy, Samantha Murphy. (calm piano music) - The instant you reach your goal, that beautiful emptiness,
that Zen moment of no desires. A fleeting few seconds of peace after months of suffering. - And I just want to say one thing. Congratulations to Mr. Brian Rose. First time he killed it, beat my ass, but yeah he put the work
in, 100% plant-based his whole training, came
under Samantha Murphy, but there it is.
(clapping) (calm piano music) - [Brian] I've spent all
of my life chasing success. And look at me now,
competing in one of the toughest endurance races in the world. I'm stuck in this never-ending cycle of proving I am the best. Is this part of my healing? Or will it make things worse? (calm piano music) - You're on such a high racing, your endorphins are going
through the fucking roof, you're putting in months
and months of training to bring to that plateau
and then it's like you're just emptying the tanks, but it's like a thing, you're like looking for okay how do I get back to that? - I mean I'm just trying
to get my head around this challenge thing, because guys like us are always like what's the next challenge, what's the next challenge and part of that got me here so I respect it, but then part of me also wonders can I be happy without those challenges? - No, I can't. Because if we as humans are not tested then we don't advance. Those tests are put there to force us to push through shit, like people that try to avoid challenges and being tested, they're not getting anywhere in life. By willingly placing yourself
into difficult situations, you advance. - You're already locked on to
that next race in six months and then you mentioned it
to me right after the race and Samantha did too, and look
I think I'm a goal-oriented guy, I think it's a beautiful thing, but then part of me also wonders am I still searching
for the next challenge and does there need to be some peace somewhere in between where you're just happy being you, is this not itself some kind of addiction in itself? - Sure, but to do what you love, there's destructive addictions, if you don't replace the
negative things in your life with positive actions, meditation and all this other stuff
that goes hand in hand, you just gonna keep falling victim. Why does my brother constantly
keep relapsing into drugs? He called me right before this race. I'm dying, fuck you, you
don't even call me anymore. I'm fucking dying. And he is dying. He's dying because of the choices he made. Hit the bottle, do the
pills, do the drugs, eat the bad food, that's
the thing about choice. - You know I was talking
to that guy Dr. Gabor Mate and he's always saying
that a lot of this stuff goes back to childhood trauma and look, compared to your life, I didn't have any trauma, but
when you're seven years old, everything feels like trauma and I've just been thinking about my own childhood traumas and I know you said that part of the reason you
probably went into performing and stuff was because feeling inadequate, but do you ever think
about that and forgiveness and how that affects
your life going forward? - Yeah, the two dudes
that did that shit to me in that home, I've never
encountered them before, I even went back to the foster home and knocked on the door and I'm glad they weren't there, because I think when I do see them, it's like I'm gonna be like you put your hands on me and did this shit when I was a kid and
couldn't defend myself, but now what? And I think that's gonna be there. I can try to speculate however
I'm gonna act toward that, but I already know what's gonna happen. - What's gonna happen? - I'm gonna fucking snatch them up. I'm not-- - Well, we'll probably not say about that. - Probably say that a child abuser should get his ass kicked. I don't have that inner
strength to be like oh yeah okay you did that
to me I forgive you, nah. No. - So you're human?
- I'm human, I'm fucking I'm just as
human as anybody else. The real growth was
that I gave up that hate because I just moved on to
another place of indifference. You could say it's worse, but I say it's what I had
to do, just block them out and that's not to say
if I don't see whoever, I'm not gonna that's just street New York. I'm like a fucking Irish motherfucker from the Lower East Side, I'm
not gonna not say nothing. (calm acoustic music) Do you feel better as a human? Do you feel better with yourself after doing what you just did, let me ask you that,
how do you feel today? - I feel amazing.
- Like a fucking champion. - I think there's a lot of things, me going through those demons and talking about that stuff publicly
and forgiving myself and people and--
- If this path works for me as fucked up as
I have been in this lifetime, it could work for anybody. I'm a prime example and that's
what being philosophical and what's having your devotions everyday, and working on yourself everyday, Prabhupada said, "Mountains in the path "will become pebbles that
you can just kick away." (dramatic music) Evolution is a never-ending pursuit. It is a series of little events that add up to a greater change. Every struggle, every
hardship, every drop of blood, every tear was a lesson and that's why if I have
one message to give, let it be the code by which
the true warrior lives: never give up. (calm piano music)
