Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, Rufus Hound, Miranda Hart, Rhod Gilbert in Would I Lie to You | #Earful

[Music] [Applause] what I lie to you the show all about terrible lies and amazing truths on Lemax team tonight the chef and food campaigner responsible for escape to River Cottage return to River Cottage the river Cottage treatment the River cottagey River Cottage forever beyond River cottage and could you please shut up about the river cottage it's Hugh Fairley what's he so look at it's Rufus Hound does adverts for the Welsh tourist board I can't help thinking they should have got someone a little higher profile maybe someone who hosts his own the hit panel show just throwing it out there it's Ron Gilbert charming witty erudite and beautiful she also gets to write all her own introductions it's Miranda Hart [Applause] it's home truths where our panelists each read out a statement from the card in front of them to make things harder they've never seen the card before so they've no idea what they'll be faced with it's up to the opposing team to sort the truth from the tosh Hugh is first up tonight who would you reveal all please occasionally as a treat I put Marmite on my face and let my dog lick it off I see it as a treat for the dog cause it like many people I apparently also very much as a treat what kind of dog please she's a springer spaniel you say this is predominantly for the dog you must enjoy it on some level because that's quite an extreme activity to do with I've always diced for a dog I've always liked having my face licked by the family dog by just the dog anyone else well cats have a raspy sandpapery tongue and it's not nearly so nice have you ever been caught in that awkward moment where you've Marmite it up and then somebody's wrong with other by members of the household but not by strangers at the door dude dogs like Marmite dolly does dogs hate Marmite it can't be true I don't think there's anybody on the planet that could answer that questions you don't think there's any was like mama no I don't either I don't want this time like a rebuke with whether anyone knew whether or not all dogs might hate Marmite you know it's very much just the other side of the coin dogs all hate mom there's dogs all right mama all those dogs have a similar view to Marmite as humans did someone who's now in series 4 you never get into conversations like this always wins or worse you're down just don't do slowly slowly it is in there almost certainly true that some dogs will like Marmite and some won't know for example I would say but no cats right like baked beans would you [Applause] not suck in the fridge and genuinely ate a bowl of baked beans genuine I swear my life and then shot only didn't she kept in the fridge probably got some milk captain shut when she got the bill for the car maybe I'm wrong about cats and baked beans what I'm saying is there are some foods liked by many humans that certain other species will never eat so what I'm saying is different species like different things and it is possum said they two months the things that humans eat that other animals do all other animals are to learn to work together this program has taken on tone of civil unrest a sense anarchy at the gates David of course nuance control your team for my team I feel like a supply a teacher who's been parachuted into a problem school who your original skin it was to do with the the dog licking off your face now now how often does this occur it's something I started doing as a kid because it was a good way to that was a several good way to what to get the family dog to lick my face so David Mitchell what are you saying truth or lie rod what do you think No whatever my captain thinks I will back into the hilt oh my word he just touched David's leg and a slight different if that's what it takes to have them working as a team ERISA sexual tension oh yeah well I don't like it what do you think I think it is a lie because he doesn't look that desperate for affection in his life it has to be allied it otherwise is something wrong with him so who firmly witting still it was a lot [Applause] who does not put Marmite on his face and let his dog lick it off as a treat I once let a German Shepherd lick Marmite off my face if you're watching Jurgen I'm sorry I I didn't mean for to end like that right I always test the temperature of my bath with my ear what's wrong with the conventional elbow well two things you firstly it amuses me to test it with my ear and secondly I I'm a big fan of the bath and I like to get it right I think it's more sensitive I sometimes test food the heat of food could you could you mine the process of how you put your ear in the bottle it's simply crushing kneeling at the bath quite high baths how high from the top would you say the water goes well probably about that much right so you're leaning down and then we Bend away all the way over to get your ear in the bath without all and I just get there quite a trellis indeed bendy hi I'm tall and bendy put my mobile number at the bottom of the swing so I'm guessing like most normal people you like a little bit of bubble bath and stuff so you're basically leaning over you go in at first through the bubble bath okay and then suddenly you've hit it oops mitt up you've come up your faces and you go all out a bit more coal to that and then you sit there and wait with your frothy face is that what we're expected to believe Lee do you usually have a bubble bath that didn't I didn't have hear that there's a bubble bath type to be fair to people be down as a bathtub yeah I can tell you that he's got an open fire in his bathroom no besides Brandon will come round and I'll say to Miranda I'm not sure if that fires too hot do you have one year that's more sensitive than the other is it the left/right always the left/right always there always has to be the left because of the where the path is are you right-handed yes that'll make sense you see do you face away I'm left-handed and I would go in with the right ear you see I'm right-handed but I would go with my right ear because of the way my bathroom is I go with my left ear I'd have to be turning my back to the taps when I did it and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing the taps are responsible for the temperature so I want to be able to look them in the eye no taps have not you guys that's your reflection video yeah what are you gonna say on this one me what do you think is she telling the truth honestly lay the physics of this are all wrong if you're kneeling it's your hips that you bend from and otherwise your whole spine would have to be able to go over at 90 degrees because it's generally really easy to just kneel down the shows roughly how it works it's literally so say the path is maybe the backwards [Music] [Applause] this is the water that's is adjusted I'll be the boss there's the water you got me that's very well done thank you [Applause] do you know what until she did that I didn't believe it and now I do I do as well no what are you theory first I still think it's a lie do you oh I'll go with you so that's true true okay Miranda will you tell the truth were you telling a lie it was a [Music] [Applause] it's a lie Miranda does not test the temperature of her bath with her ears rod you're next I once had a job where I had to answer the phone and say hello beef Haley's team what do you think what was what was the job it was a job it's an office job where an office job an office job right an office an office job yeah no an office job is I'm not confused with this the bit about the beef that's get into the government department where we dealt with beef and agricultural Department in Welsh government so they drink on the cellular beef and the kind of questions they would ask you would be they'd say well we it was it was all about about cab all about identifying animals identifying them yeah so they sneak oh hello be for the laughter you're just the man I'm looking at a big black [Applause] it's cow I'm beef goodbye well you might want to put him to the cyclic out depends he was male or female what is a subtler cow I don't know any working beef no it was in West Wales was it think tomorrow come on the kid well II come Alvin Haverfordwest come Alvin Marvin you should work on the trains the Welsh office is in Cardiff but the Welsh of its agricultural department Wawa is in command so far farmers would ring you up and ask you questions about the string me up and they'd say gone animal yeah and it needs identification and we would give them but we would give them cattle identification documents it was the CID Department CID CID there's been a murder CID was cattle a dent efficient document just like a cow passport and we would they'd ask us questions about our passport account passport they bring up when they say we've got a new a new cow in town send out you'd send out the official documentation tell me they would tell me the animals details and we would print a CID cutlet dance fish because he did this everyone everyone everyone every cow I'll have you carry you so what are you gonna say then Lee is he telling the truth well if you you know a lot about cows I've rung up departments of Defra and said hello and they've said hello beef yeah so the whole world one thing you wouldn't just come up with it unless you're a very quick and very clever okay well don't he's saying true rod were you telling the truth it was yes sir rug did once on a job where you have to ensure every cow had a passport oh it's hard enough getting him into the milking shed let alone a photo booth three points and Lee's team have one [Applause] guest who has a close connection to one of our panelists this week each of Lee's team will claim it's them that has the genuine connection to the guests and it's up to David's team to spot who's telling the truth so please welcome this week's special guest Steve [Music] welcome Steve so Q first of all what is Steve to you this is my friend Steve who rescued me when I got stuck in a cave looking for bats this is my friend Steve and together we have visited every pub inside the m25 called the Red Lion apart from four of them and Lee how do you know Steve this is Steve and we once went camping together when we were in the scouts and we woke up to find that someone had stolen our tent it's team where to begin so when was this camping trip Lee this camping trip was all I would have been about 13 12 think 12 and how old the Steve Steve was about I don't know 13 he was he wasn't born he was he was about seven seven or eight so you at Tyler thirteen he wasn't in the scouts he was just a seven-year-old you the cups of the scouts went together he was in the cops I was in the scouts and they every Scout with it they stay put each each young boy in with an older boy in each day so where were you camping I'm camping somewhere in the lake districts I think it was called the Lake District correct one to sleep with the tent woke up without a tent do you know what happened to said tent it well that's a good question we don't know to this day what happened to said tent yes I know stolen to it you don't think it might have blown away you so you woke up no tent in you assumed foul play deep asleep of that there was a gale force we go what you are asserting that and that alone I would say you are telling the truth let's not sneak up on you not have a built-in ground cheat no it did not because otherwise it would have been this is Steve and we were once kidnapped I know jump in here David please move on to somebody else he's a huge Batman to Batcave where were you trapped in a cave in Sri Lanka really mm-hmm what were you doing in Sirte cave looking for bats that went wrong it got dark in the dark yes but when I went into the cave there was quite a bit of sunlight coming into the entrance and actually going quite far into the cave and I just sort of went as far as I thought was safe but then that the Sun went over a ridge outside the cave and it suddenly got very dark and I'd gone further into the cave and I thought but then Steve wandered past Steve actually heard me shouting for help why were you looking for bats in a cave in Sri Lanka were you looking to eat them funny should say that they did have they'd had bat on the menu in the hotel and I was told that they got them from this cave and out of curiosity I thought well I'll go and look I had also heard that they had a rather grim way of catching them which is to hang fish hooks down from the top of the cave did you go on your own yes and then so you called for help and Steve was walking past the entrance Steve lovely guy was staying at the hotel and he heard my cries for help did they catch bats with a lion why didn't just spray them with something I'll just going on chinga I think luhan's the integrity of the individual bat as a starter or main course machine-gun bullets machine gun a zebra doesn't really spoil it David what about what about Rufus's claimed the whole pub thing which are the four red lions that you've not been to where are they I don't remember you can't find them but you know there are four exactly yeah we got a list of all the pubs called the Red Lion and then we went to visit all of them and I know that there were four that we did not go and visit did you go to one on South Ealing Road opposite Ealing Studios yes yeah we we just we came up with it as an idea because we knew that there were a lot of them and we thought it would be good to visit all of them in a pier in a period of time yeah over a week is about 46 we have you visited 42 red lines with Steve in one week yeah how do you know Steve from a [Applause] right so David's team is Steve Hughes caveman Rufus's pub crawler all these camping friend Lee is definitely beliefs today we're quite believed yeah no I don't believe Rufus at all Rufus has got a bit of edge to him Steve looks so sweet - presentable I don't think he'd be in this weird Rufus were just leaving Hugh I believe you am I even getting a look in here no obviously if it turns out you're true then super you saying its Savior okay okay so Steve would you please reveal your true identity well I'm Steve I'm Rivers's best friend together we visited all of the pubs called the Red Lion Inn side of the m25 apart from four [Applause] the end of that round gave his team have four points Lee's team have two which brings us to our final round quickfire lies in which our panelists lie not only through their teeth but against the clock and we start with it's david possession ah okay oh bloody tent [Music] this is the this is the cricket ball with which I bowled out Jeremy Clarkson at a charity cricket match there we are can we see the bull a leg spin don't give you multiple choice sort of medium pace ready what are you expecting to see well there's a couple of things firstly how long ago was this charity match it was two years ago I think does that what you checking the serial number no I was looking to see how bashed around it was where the splits were if it looked like it had been hit I mean it don't eat it it's until you show us your bowling action David yes all right this is dart with a good catch watch out for something before any of you had a chance to think whether that might be patronizing you know no I would I would Bowl it wouldn't I but no I won't let go it's like that what score was he on when he bowled him I think about 12 and did he run between them or just jump in his jag which other popular celebrities were were there what Nicholas Parsons was there you've got a whole team for quite a lot to go stir and and and I think that was sort of it one everyone wasn't I said everything so people are buying tickets to watch this game and it was going towards charity yeah and the draw was Jeremy Clarkson David Mitchell Nicholas Parsons 20 quid a ticket yeah [Music] what are you gonna say Lee is he telling the truth or not well I really don't think he is you don't think you know because that it doesn't appear to be a ball that was used for that purpose what do you think you I think it might be true actually you think it's true I think it's a fly you say it's a lie David will you turn the truth but was it a lie it is a lie David did not Bowl out Jeremy Clarkson at a charity cricket match of course it's a lie I mean given the chance to hurl a cricket ball towards Jeremy Clarkson who among us could honestly say they'd aim at the stumps it's Lee looking forward to this I trained for last year's Paris marathon but pulled out when a doctor advised me that one of my legs is shorter than the other what do you think why did you train for the Paris marathon because I couldn't get into the London Marathon why one leg short the other [Music] because it was full what time here is the Paris marathon about April how embarrassing selling in London Matthew as follows a man dressed as a pig doesn't mean anything that hasn't applied early we can't get off people to fill this come to the fields and try and rope some pigs into hello Pig what made you go to the doctor did you have an injury did you feel pain what I did I felt pain during the training and I said where was the pain in my leg is it not possible for people who have uneven legs to get shoes that compensate for that that's right he said that he gave me that right he gave me life isn't that fine when your legs different your whole body adjusts to make up for it and it was so different it would have to be like a stiletto and a trainer to put in your shoe which will help you do some regular exercise but your marathon days are over yesterday the what you're gonna say do you think he's telling the truth lie why oh I believe it Thank You Man so truth to Miranda live from David I think it could be true Bob I think if he'd really wanted to do it you could have done it I'll rephrase it okay I trained for last year's Paris marathon but pulled out when a doctor advised me that one of my mates is shir than the other he did say well actually you really tried I do you probably do about my lazy bastard saying lie your team says like okay Lee are you telling the truth are you telling us a lie it is in fact yes is true I did train for last year's Paris marathon but pulled out when a doctor advised him that one of his legs is shorter than the other actually I have completely the opposite problem one of my legs is longer than the other signals time is up and it's the end of the show and I can tell you that in a very narrow victory Lee's team have triumphed by five points - four it's not just a team game and my individual wire of the week is Hugh Fernley which is slow haven't served up such a variety of porky pies since his last TV show but if I win a million tonight I'll give filmed some to you rest of the life by the ranks the National Lottery throws next then one call you really don't want to get Miami Watson levels the mystery of the Ring film horror in ten minutes and as plenty of great live music and mud as BBC three comes from the Reading Festival [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Earful Comedy

Views: 238,406

Keywords: english comedy, Funny videos 2019, funny videos 2018, jokes, dad jokes, stand up comedy, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, Rufus Hound, Miranda Hart, Rhod Gilbert

Id: -jvVtXgGOyg

Length: 29min 13sec (1753 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 24 2019