Would I Lie To You with Miranda Hart and Lee Mack | S06 E03 | All Brit

good evening and welcome to would i lie  to you the show with tremendous truths and   humongous lies on david mitchell's team  tonight a man whose tv show is called   richard bacon's beer and pizza club not  only is it good fun but if it comes on   tv more than five minutes late you get  free garlic bread it's richard bacon and uh the man who gave us touch the truck   pets win prizes and hole in the  wall yet still no bathtub it's   a tv presenter who's so immersed in the  culture of horse racing when she buys a   new pair of shoes it's all she can do to stop  herself nailing them on it's claire boarding and a comedian and star of the very realistic  call the midwife i didn't watch it myself   i just stayed the other side of the screen  and offered encouragement it's miranda hart and so we begin with round one  home truths where our panelists   each read out a statement from the card  in front of them and to make things harder   they've never seen the card before so they've  got no idea what they'll be faced with   it's up to the opposing team to sort the fact  from the fiction dale is first up tonight okay as a child rather than sleeping with a comfort  blanket or teddy bear i slept with a potato lemak what do you think was it the same potato  or did you did you have different potatoes   over the years well that was the problem  because you get attached to a potato   so when you get attached to a potato it's  rotting a bit but it's your comfort it's like you   your teddy bears it smells of your old teddy bear  or whatever it happens to be the potato is my   favorite potato and i used to draw on it so it was  one potato the whole time the actual truth is it   was taken away from me and i cried and i cried and  i cried but they threw it out so it took me like   another three or four weeks to get used to the  new potato dale did they have names your potatoes   no you slept with a potato that you  didn't even know its name well oh did yes hug them did you  have them close to your face   i used to put it on the pillow  like that and i used to bash it is that how you show love dale what's the bashing well that's well i suck  the dent it made in the pillow oh so you'd bash   it onto the pit and then you'd sleep take it  out so that's where you're going to bed later   be honest it's the truth of this story that  your parents would shout through the door   what are you doing in there and you'd  say nothing just bashing the potato you haven't asked me why i stopped and this is why  you're realizing oh dale why did you stop because   mrs marx who was our next door neighbor i  heard her talking to my mother in the driveway   and i heard mrs mark say to my mother  is he still sleeping with the potato   i think that they've been talking about  it and she probably said to mrs marx   did any of your children ever  want to sleep with a potato   so what are you thinking lee miranda i sort  of want it to be true because he's so sweet   i do think the two winning things are that that's  where you're going to sleep yeah and mrs martin i think mrs marx exists yeah and i like mrs moore   i like what she represents she represents  the sanity of the street and the they're all beauty the shop so what are you going to say lee what's  it going to be i think you think it's true or do   you think i think it's true all right i'll go with  my team and say that it's true you're saying it's   true okay dale winton the potato in the bed was  it the truth or was it a lie i have slept with   many things over the years because i'm a very  old man but i have never slept with a potato yes it was a very convincing lie as a child  dale didn't sleep with a potato richard   you're next okay when i worked in mcdonald's my  long-term girlfriend joined the queue to my till   and when she got to the counter she dumped me  lee lee so how old were you i was uh uh 18 i   think i was 18. okay so you're 18 years old how  long did you consider a long-term girlfriend to   be when you're 18. well she was actually my first  girlfriend her her name was presumably is uh kate   not in touch she could have died i mean  i don't know look on the bright side k dumpster was she special she  was she was it's a special k   joke i'm not explaining anymore i'd like to make  your special k robot i have to mention crunchy   well i think when it comes to breakfast cereals  there is one that stands head and shoulders so long how long was long term two years but when  you're 18 that's a long time can you remember   what she said to you i can't actually miranda i  know but what made it doubly heartbreaking was   i i loved that job and what well you didn't  get sat did you well nobody but i was very   i loved the job and then she came in and broke  my heart at this place that meant so much to me   and that added to the emotional impact of  of what she said what was it about the job   that you love so much let me tell you a fact  about this place this is amazing right the   the regular meat which is the meat that goes  in their signature burger it goes from frozen   to fully cooked in 44 seconds i found this  amazing fascinating i wonder why she dumped you i think we should get back to the girl well she  fell to the front of the queue she dumped me there   and then and i left my station didn't serve the  other customers and then i went to the store room   and i sat on a box of gherkins and i cried my  eyes out oh that's jerking's for you though kate k put in her order she puts in the road and  says i would like bedrooms okay what's your name   special k joke doesn't work i don't want to say  that okay i thought it deserved a bigger laugh i wondered why the hell you said it you're always trying to work it round to crunchy  nuts leave him alone richard you be young richard   okay at the counter of this fast food outlet okay  david you are a normal customer dale is kate oh   could i please have a uh uh a fillet o fish but  with no cheese hold the cheese hold the cheese   and put the cheese on the chips please but  not with cheese on the bread where the toilet they're just uh they're actually just  next to my till actually the door's just   about there i'll uh see you later kate oh gosh it's my girlfriend kate hello kate  well i thought i'd come in and see you tonight oh it's meryl streep in the iron lady i'm afraid richard um it's over  um you're just not my kind of guy beautiful oh so what are you thinking lee  is this does this sound credible to you   i'm suddenly going truth and i think he was  dumped in a queue okay and said burger joint   i i find it staggering that he remembers all the  facts that he remembers about how long it takes   me to defrost and yet he cannot remember what she  actually said is an answer to the front of the cue   the answer to that is he's a man so lee what's  it going to be truth or lie are we going you're   saying lighter that's how you're saying miranda  says true yeah go i will go with miranda and say   it's true you say it's true okay richard bacon was  that the truth or was it a lie that story is true yes it's true when richard worked in  a fast food restaurant his long-term   girlfriend joined the queue to his  till and dumped him when she got to   the counter and then to rub salt in  the wound she ordered a happy meal our next round is called this is my where  we bring on a mystery guest who has a close   connection to one of our panelists now  this week each of lee's team will claim   it's them that has the genuine connection to  the guest and it's up to david's team to spot   who's telling the truth so please welcome  this week's special guests robert and will so claire what are robert and will to you  this is robert will they do my garden and   to avoid the embarrassment of me ever  getting them mixed up i call them both   barry okay lee how do you know robert and will  uh this is robert and will i once used them to   convince an audience i could teleport people  and finally miranda your relationship with   robert and will this is robert and will i was a  judge at the identical twins of the year award   and they came third but we had to disqualify them  because it turns out they were two of triplets   wow there we have it so claire's green fingered  barry's lee's teleporting to some or miranda's   cheating triplets uh david where where'd  you begin explain the rationale behind the   identical twins of the year well i have to  say when i was asked to come along and judge   i was a little confused but um i think there's a  sort of magazine or trade magazine or it's part   or there was some a trade magazine what's  the trade twins for the marketing of twins   yeah i've heard of that i've actually heard  of the competition yes there is a competition   with twins what do they have to do in the  competition well it's the physical look-alike   thing like how much they look like and then  they also do kind of um games like mr mrs type   games so it's a personality thing as well how  did they do did they win or no they came third   but they were then disqualified why because of  the triplets thing yeah and we did see a third   but i didn't sit but apparently there's a third  one so the sorry the triplet turned up to this   that's that's not exactly moscow rules is it the  third one was um picking them up to take them home   the scene uh claire robert and willie your  gardeners and you call them both barry isn't   that a bit of an of sort of an affront to their  individuality no because the first time i did it   i said would you like cup of tea barry love and as  soon as you put love on the end of it they're fine   with it they just smiled and a cup of tea and  they were fine and do you know a lot of um when   sound engineers work a lot on outside broadcast  they all call each other percy they'll call each   other purse and so they call me purse as well and  i call them purse and i called them barry yeah why   because they work with so many different people  they can't actually remember everyone's names   are you sure they're not trying to mug you  puss pass those nails they're very clean for   gardeners aren't they well i hope they've had  a bath before they come tonight no but they are   they are pristine beautiful soft  hands um i'm not coming on to you richard if you want to go and have  a look you can thank you very much   i'd love to do that you're not  allowed to touch but you can look   do you want to have a look jaya would you  like not particularly really i'll go on that i'm now not as attracted to these hands as i once  was there's actually some dirt under the nails   all right don't touch dale just could you turn  them over i feel i should have a look as well it'll look unconscious that could be the remnants of soil   they're not very big so you know where  your gardener's hands look i don't know   i'm like everyone else here apparently i don't  have a gardener i know you'd probably expect i'd   have about nine what did you think of what you saw  there richard what how did the hands rate for you   that's actually really thrown me a little bit now  and i sort of slightly regret going over there   well from this distance they're beautiful  pristine manicured hands and actually close   up this there's some dirt under the nose i  hope to god these poor fellas are gardeners by the way what was this particular show you were you were  trying to pretend to the audience that you were   able to teleport people correct was it a stage  show or tv show was it a stage show or a tv show   oh that's funny are you an interpreter of  day off i thought you'd said it i'd missed   it so i was asking my team captain  what's your friend saying david what was it a stage show or a tv show okay  uh it was a stager and where was it on   it was on at the hackney empire and when was it  on it was on in the mid 90s and what was it called   um it was a new act competition  for new people and i thought i'll   i'll do a magic trick because it'll impress  everyone yeah make up for the comedy talk me through the act what did you  do good magic circle love magic circle   right can't tell you anything tell us i'm not giving away secrets on television so go  on leigh what did you do you you're there on the   stage the audience are enrapt so i come on and i  bring someone out the audience and then i put them   in a box at one side of the stage or in a cupboard  actually i put them in a cupboard and then i'll   do a bit of the showbiz magic yeah said a few  words might be alakazam and then uh do the site   and then i open up a box and out comes the first  person who's gone in out the other way it looks   like that yeah yeah yeah but cleaner is already in  the box and he sits down and the audience gave me   a big round of applause that's actually quite  good and he goes and sits down in the seat so   you've done the teleport thing then what do you  do straight into the levitation i'm not an idiot actually as a technique for a magic trick  and trying to make it look so someone's   magic across the room said you're quite clever do  you still do it tell me tell the judges that night   yeah how did you do awful came  third turns out as a triplet right we need an answer so david's team are  robert and will claire's green fingered barrys   lee's teleporting twosome or miranda's cheating  triplets what do you think though i think it's   lee i think he's telling the truth okay uh  richard what about you i i don't believe lee   and they had a bit of soil on their hands i think  the gardeners david what about you i don't think   lee did a random magic trick at the beginning of  his try out spot of the hacking empire in 1995.   maybe he did but i just i don't believe it so  i think i think i agree with richard i think   it's claire i think you think it's claire  yeah okay here we go robert and will would   you please reveal your true identity i'm robert  i'm will and lee tried to convince an audience yes lee used robin will to convince  an audience he could teleport someone   thank you very much robert and will which brings us to our final round  quickfire lies and start with lee possession right there's a box under the  desk lee uh now i'd like you to take the   item out of the box and hold the object then  read the card out please this is my dibber   i donated it to the british lawmower  museum where it is now a permanent   exhibit uh david what is a dipper what's a  dibber uh a dipper that's a good question david   and would you believe me if i was to  say i don't know but it's a it's a god so what does it do what does  it do are you fred flintstone i guess i would say that a dipper is for pushing  holes in the in the ground yeah and then maybe   popping something in there like a seed i see  how did your dibber come to be in the british   lawnmower museum um i'll tell you inspector  morse have you ever been to southport my   hometown uh i have yes oh great can i start again  yes right i have never been to the british lobby i was on live but it is in south carolina that's  true and i did see it online what did you put into   google that that came up uh well you don't want  to know that but i noticed on the website there   was a bit that said that the tools of the rich  and famous famous tools that's what i typed in   there is actually i do know for a fact that  there is a british lawmaker museum because i   myself have donated a trowel you haven't i have  honestly rob i donated a trowel what is that surely they want a lawnmower so you saw the   lawn museum online online a list of celebrity  artifacts there was quite a few there was the   brian may um from queen had given a law  mower joe pasquale had given a strimmer   so what what happened then i thought that'd  be a nice thing to do wouldn't it because   you decided you saw that and you thought i want  a piece of that i want a piece of the action if   prince charles he gave something this is where  the story is falling apart because what is it   that's not where the story is but one is  asked to donate to you i wanted to donate   something i thought it'd be quite nice to have  something of mine because it's my hometown   so you picked up the phone i paid something  you're still doubting my abilities aren't you it is not your ability to make a phone call in the  phone are you seriously saying that the fact that   you could have physically made this phone call  means i should believe that you did i pinched you   i could have made the call i'm physically capable  therefore it happened david end of story i picked   up the phone i phoned them up i said i'd like  to donate something they said what have you got   i said uh dipper you knew its name well actually  i i yes you knew its name but you didn't know what   it was that's actually not true i said so what  did you say i took advice before the phone call   from whom from who from whom i'm not doing  if you put an m at the end all right from who i want to i want to know who you asked about  that object in order to find out what it was   called i shall tell you well please david david  tennant or as i call him doctor who you asked there are seven billion humans on earth   please let's not eliminate them one by one  i i asked my wife so david what do you think   is lee telling the truth or is he lying dale  i don't believe a word of it if it is true   it's one of the best acting performances  i think i've ever seen you know you've got it is in fact not only is it true but how  exciting is this we've got a picture   there it is in situ at the british lawnmower  museum that's incredible isn't it a just a   simple tool who donated his dibber to  the british museum next it's miranda   i once embarrassed myself in front  of the local vicar at christmas is that it vague isn't it is that all  we're getting well no we can get more   what happened well uh it was christmas and um  the vicar had to come round to my aunt and uncles   where i was having christmas um sort of drinks  i think i went went to sit next to him and sat   sort of and sat on a on the edge of a sofa and  as i sat back like that i i broke enormous wind and did he say anything he he he's here which is what made it so funny for me why did you  go over to sit next to the vicar to start with   because um i think my sister was there and i  thought oh no she's been numbered with the vicar   and i thought oh she might  need some conversational help   brilliant which i sort of provided what direction  was the vicar at this point i don't know if he was   down or upwind but he was involved i mean he saw  his hair moved i think actually what what i did   i think i burst that laughing  did one of those laugh spits so nobody farted at the man you then spat on you know what do you think david what are you going  to say miranda the way you taught the story at   the beginning i couldn't work out you had a lot  of pauses in there was that for a fact were you   thinking obviously went along and i think i  think probably worth it making it up as you   went along so i think it's possibly probably a  lie dale what do you think miranda is like one   of those fabulous people in the world who's  uninhibited with no am i right you're kind   of like oh what the heck i don't know my face  is a mask so you think it's true you think it's   a lie yeah i'll say i think it's true you think  it's true okay miranda true it is actually true   yes it's true that miranda did embarrass  herself in front of the local vicar next oh it's me when i'm in a play as part of my nightly  vocal warm-up i perform sets of scales   in the voice of a chimpanzee will  you give us a quick rendition sauce you just do this for plays because i've been  next to you in addressing them i think for a   gig and i didn't hear chimpanzees i used to do  a singing tape oh and then what that was like that's really lovely don't blow your nose  rob where did you get this from who who was   it another celebrity that gave you the no no it  was one night i was doing it and the other actor   uh said when i started going says just relax he  said you sound like a chimpanzee so then i went   and i found it really opened up the diaphragm  and actually it worked can you go the other way   can you go from the high notes  what dale was asking me earlier   is he angry is he angry well it's hard to  tell what color his face is but can you go   can you go can you go from the highlight   oh excellent i think that is good who was  the actor who said you look like a chimpanzee   miranda you know very well he didn't say i looked  like a chimpanzee you're not gonna trip me up like   that it was kenneth branagh kenneth bradley gave  you this idea he did yeah laugh it up balding   i know the reaction was how preposterous  the man with the breakfast cereal would be   in a play with kenneth branagh yet it was true  so what are you thinking mitchell winton bacon   i think it's true you think it's true do you  think it's true oh absolutely he does it so well   i think it would sort of help yeah uh what  about what about you baldwin mack heart   is a series of illnesses sense you've got  balding mack heart so what are you going to say   luke is probably lying i think it's true  i'm actually you're saying you're saying   you're taking a right old hoot doing that  yeah you say no i'm going to go with you   so you're going to say lie you're saying  you're saying true it is in fact a lie it's a lie when i'm in a play i don't perform  sets of scales in the voice of a chimpanzee   oh that noise signals time is up it's the  end of the show i can reveal that lee's team   have won by four points for two but of course it's not just a team game and my   individual liar of the week  this week is dale winton yes dale winton a man who lies so much   i don't know how his wife and  three children put up with it you

Channel: Banijay Comedy

Views: 53,936

Keywords: british comedy, british comedy series, Comedy, British comedy, best British comedy, British humour, would i lie to you, wilty, wilty series 6, lee mack, david mitchell, rob brydon, lee mack would i lie to you, david mitchell would i lie to you, rob brydon would i lie to you, would i lie to you series 6, would i lie to you series 6 episode 3, wilty series 6 episode 23, Clare Balding, Mirana Hart, Richard Bacon, miranda would i lie to you, Dale Winton, lee mack doctor who

Id: yYV3RwhrjSk

Length: 29min 5sec (1745 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 14 2022