How To Use Your Voice So People Listen | Lisa Nichols

[Music] speaking voice message it belongs to all of us the day of stage speakers only motivational speakers only speaking to cell are long gone every single one of us has a voice to use every single one of us has a responsibility to use our voice I'm here to help you magnify the power of your voice whether you're using it on stage great the majority of you won't I hope not overrated because the places that your voice are gonna make the most difference are in the trenches in living rooms and bedrooms and offices at community events and the train station I hope you don't wait to get on a stage to use your voice see my best work really was done and it's still done off the stage I simply come on stage to meet a bunch of amazing people and then we go do work in other places that matter so today I'm going to take you on a journey faster than I'd like but more powerful than I hope any of you expected I'm going to talk about how do you use your voice in such a way that you infect and affect people and the planet now I'm gonna give you some techniques I'm gonna give you some things to my team from yesterday you guys got a whole lot you guys are probably still chewing on that right so I'm gonna add a little bit to it somes going to some things I'm gonna say are going to just solidify that I'm gonna give it to you from another angle for others it's your first time I'm going to handle with care' sea otters are all around us otters come in all different sizes ages colors different religious backgrounds or turns like Mother Teresa who teaches us the art of humility and what it means to be a servant leader our turns like Mahatma Gandhi teaching us that we are the example that we're looking for that we woke up whole and complete and enough alters like small children who say the wisest and funniest things in their transparency my nephew was sitting on my great uncle Leonard slap and my great uncle Leonard he smoked cigars for like every year of my life and I at the time was like 19 and I never saw him without a cigar so uncle Leonard smelled like a would a really old cigar and everyone knew uncle Leonard smelled like a cigar but no one had the courage to tell uncle Leonard that he smelled like a cigar you guys everybody has had two uncle Leonard somewhere in your life right because uncle Leonard was my grandmother's brother so he had clout well Jameel was three so he didn't know he he hasn't been introduced to being politically correct yet thank God right so Jameel is sitting on my uncle Leonard's lap and we're all talking Jamil stops in the middle of a sentence and he goes and the first time he sniff no big deal but the second and the third time then in his little three-year-old voice uncle yeah nerd you think and you can hear a pin drop in the room and everyone in that moment was grateful that they were not jameelah's mother and we all gazed at her bad mom bad mom the next thing that fell out of uncle Leonard smiles shocked us all he looked at Jamil with a long gaze kind of not knowing what's about to happen gaze and he said Jamil I think you're right I think I think for the first time in my entire life uncle Leonard put out his cigar and the next time we saw uncle Leonard it smelt like he had just been washed for days he was always clean but his clothes just smelled like old cigars and it was very clear that he got new clothes see the freedom that a child has the truth that they stand with I want to take you on a journey back to that level of truth I want to take you on a journey on why they say think like a child don't act like a child but think like a child be as free as a child see children have a sense of curiosity children forgive sooner quicker faster and if you want something new to come out of your voice you have to put something new in you in terms of a commitment my son like I watched the way he would forgive me yeah he did something wrong one day and I have to reprimand him and I immediately felt guilty and I'm in my office he's like four years old and I'm on my computer and I'm crying cuz I'm single mother guilt entrepreneur and I'm like and he comes around the corner he goes to mommy and I just reprimanded him he's on a timeout and all this stuff and I'm upset I'm crying he's okay [Laughter] and he comes around the corner and I'm and he says mommy mommy I was like yes do you want to lay down with me yes and he goes and he lays out this little skinny arm and I put my big ol head on that arm there's something that happens when we allow ourselves to sit inside freedom sit inside transparency sit inside what I like to call carefrontation hmm that means I might push up against you a little bit I might make you mildly to moderately to significantly uncomfortable in any form of mediocracy but it's out of the spirit of love you want to inspire people with your voice from your child to your sibling to your significant other to your community to the world to this room be willing to love me enough to tell me your truth they'll love me enough to tell me my truth then love me enough to just tell me the truth and and fine fine be willing to touch the edge of your own comfort zone you show me yours and I'll show you mine you show me your heart and I'll show you my love you let me know that you're willing to be imperfect and still have a perfectly giving serving loving life then you give me permission to let my imperfection out into the world to see you want to speak out another level you gotta be willing to love at another level forgive at another level show up at another level speak up add another level pray at another level you have to be willing on every level to uplevel who you be on a daily basis the fan in recognizing that when you open up and use your voice everything that comes out after you speak really doesn't belong to you see is very difficult to speak phenomenally and to not be good come on y'all from yourself in to rabbits see unforgettable has everything to do with serving at a level so high so big so massive that people feel like they have to change their lives because they crossed your path yes yes yes yes yes yes see see when you're willing to use your voice first you have to recognize that you have one you got to recognize that that no matter your past you were given a voice and your voice was given not to keep to yourself your voice is not a secret says the secret teacher and you have to be willing to use every experience that's ever happened in your life not as a fortress holding you from using your voice but as the fuel on why you will use your voice you got to be willing to not stand in your story but stand on your story yes yes it's not in spite of your past that you get to be amazing that you get to be a change agent that you get to transform lives it's because of your past that you're perfect for such a job when you own it like that see there's no question in my certainty about my life can you walk with that level of certainty so that when the wind comes and then when the wind blows and it will come and it will blow and it will be a storm and it will be a tornado and it will look like divorce and it will look like bankruptcy and it will look like an illness and it will look like a loss when it it will rock you it will rock you it will rock you but it won't move you see when you stand in that certainty y'all breathe I saw y'all that's how y'all look how like damn she intense they didn't get you the memo I came for your breakthrough I came to inspire you beyond any other moment you may have had some inspiration around how you use your voice how you own the power of your voice because see one time at one time I didn't know I had a voice I didn't know someone would listen to my voice I didn't know my voice mattered I remember I was the first class of bus students way back in the day I was the first class of bus students to the valley right here in Canoga Park and I always say they told us in the inner city that we were going to the valley but they forgot to tell the valley we were coming and I remember I had never I had never seen myself as anything less than anybody I just didn't have that conversation until I went there until I went there and and I remember they were having tryouts for Charlie's Angels remember Charlie's Angels you young bucks I'm not talking about the new ones talking about the old school charlie angels you know Farrah Fawcett in Kate Jackson right and they were having tryouts for Charlie's Angels and the Bionic Woman you remember Lindsay Wagner Lindsay Wagner was amazing and I said oh my god this is my chance see I had been teased every day of the school year I there was this one kid Brian and Brian would remind me every day that God had made a mistake when God had created me he would say things like Lisa God dropped you in the tar pit and God left you in the oven too long and got and I and I summarized it as damn I'm God's mistake really and every day Brian would do that so about three months in to the school year when they had tryouts I was our I was always asked well I lived in South Central so I was just fast let me be honest and clear but we can transcribe that so athletic and so so when they had tryouts I said oh my god if I try out and I make it and I become one of Charlie's Angels or I become the Bionic Woman then I belong see I just wanted to belong anybody know what I'm talking about when you just wanted to belong hands up one hand up or two hands above that's really huge I just wanted to belong whether you want to belong to your family you want it to belong to your community I just wanted to belong with it by any means necessary so I was excited on this day I mean I'm practicing at home I'm doing all the little things I think they might ask us to do and 40 girls 40 excited girls stepped up to the line to be considered to do the three things that you had to do the three you know challenges you have to cross in order to become one of the Charlie's Angels or the Bionic Woman I was the only little chocolate girl there just looking like a little kiss right so the first event was the hundred-yard - ready set go and I ran ran ran ran ran when I cross the finish line the first person that just hit the 50-yard mark Lisa Nichols wins the first of it I'm like yes one down two to go I'm almost in I'm almost gonna belong second event second event oh my god it was like they had so many things they they they they kept deciding and now it's like 20 girls left it's like 20 girls left and we're all standing there and they're okay so now we want you guys to to jump over a chair and every girl jumped over the chair and they jumped in some didn't quite clear the chair some parents have to go to the dentist immediately but I did something different when I bent down to go over the chair I did a little extra eye when I came up on when ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii ii and i leaped over the chair and i landed and then i feel some wonder woman owner they were confused they don't know what hit them they said lisa nichols won the second event as well and then the third and final event was the rolls stopping freeze sucker you remember that you're not you don't you very important you have to like do your hair right and i did it perfect on the dime so in the final like eight nine girls are sitting on the line I'm like oh my god my life is gonna change right now I'm going to belong see the people that you're going out to speak to the people that you'll speak to one to one or one to small group or one to many are online through a webinar or Facebook or however you touch them all they want to do is belong and so I'm standing on the line and I'm like oh life is about to look way different like the first thing I'm gonna do is get my other Charlie's Angels girl get my Bionic Woman and we're gonna go and punch Brian first I got to get in first I got to get in I mean I was in the fifth grade y'all right and so they said Charlie's Angels number one Diane okay that's not my name Diane is excited but guy yes yes she goes to the side now there's three judges three girls and one guy she must be Charlie but school Charlie's Angels number two Teresa okay that's cool let's go I got one more Charlie's Angels or the Bionic Woman that's all right sorry it's good Charlie's Angels number three Kim it's good I like the Bionic Woman anyway she just shows through that's alright that's alright that's alright antibiotic woman yes yes yes the Bionic Woman is look Linda that's not my name I thought they made a mistake they meant to say Lisa until I saw Linda running over to the judges jumping up and down and running with her other new team members new super she rose jumping up and down I realize I said that's okay they said they was gonna pick one alternate one alternate I'll be the alternate somebody gotta get the flu the chickenpox somebody somebody I'm gonna be right there I'm not missing a day of school today she missed school I'm gonna be hit right there and the alternate she'll be I stood there for a moment I can hear a few boos a few people upset and I finally mustered up the nerves to go over to the judges and I still wonder why did I do that he sent me in a spiral years but in the moment I didn't know what they were about to say I didn't know what was about to hit me right in the face I said scuse me why didn't you choose me I won every single event I ran the fastest huh Rose stop them freeze sucker on the diamond the asphalt was hot I jumped over the chair and I made the sound effects and one of the judges long beautiful blonde hair she said Lisa we know you won every event but we couldn't choose you which Charlie's Angels are the Bionic Woman will you ever look like and that day was the day that I began to blame myself for my story I don't know if any of you have ever been born into a conversation or an experience an economic reality a geographical location an origin a culture religious anybody and you you ask yourself one day or another why me here hello somebody this means you gotta raise your hand if you can fill it yeah y'all like man this is deep and so I begin this conversation why me why meet this skin why meet this community why me this culture why me this family why can I've been born in Canoga Park why I've visited where it looked like everything was great and they got to be the super Shiro's why for the next 15 years I asked that for the next 15 years I said inside a personal blame and more than anything shame conversation anybody know what I'm talking about for the next 15 all I tried to do was prove I was good enough prove I was smart enough prove that I was worthy of choosing anybody know what I'm talking about and then I I discovered that I wanted to begin to use my voice I I I could hear this thing in my voice when I spoke and I said I I think there's something I think there might be a gift up under all that junk and I begin to try my voice out and I was in a church and I I was delivering a poem I won't do all of it but it it the beginning of it was something like this my beautiful sisters frying their brains going insane right at the end of my block beautiful brothers exterminating terminating terminating himself assassinating all for the sake of the rock at the end of my block see was about my community and it was in my church so I I wanted to let them know that I saw them my my mother my my my beautiful brothers exterminating terminating and self assassinating all for the sake of my rod my black mom was being robbed on my back doorstep babies are being killed right at my feet brothers executing brothers on my front line Oh someone's grandfather's dying from not enough to eat right at the end of my block what is this bizarre deranged and insane occurrence this is life breath in existence in my world at the end of my block should I run should I hide should I leave damn want to cry should I become a part of the problem Lord how do I become a part of the solution all's I know is that I will be a part of something good right here right now on my block and at the end of the speech I got a roaring standing ovation from the 15,000 people that were in this church it was the biggest standing ovation biggest audience I've ever spoke in front of and as I'm walking through the audience Michael would you help me down would you guys turn the lights on and keep the cameras going I might move a little bit as I as I thank you my walk through the audience I people are put their hands on my shoulders Lisa job well done Lisa job well done Lisa job well done and all of a sudden I heard this voice that was so familiar with this hand on my shoulder she said you were amazing and I turned around and I looked and it was televisions Bionic Woman Lindsay Wagner I immediately said I wanted to be you in the fifth grade I ran real fast I won every event I did you know how you hold on to your junk right come on you guys how many of you your future is trying to open up to you but you won't let go of your past come on you guys come on you guys let's just tell the truth there's a lesson in this story so many things are trying to come to you so many doors are trying to open but we're so attached to who we've been that we can't quite become all of who were supposed to be in that moment in that moment I I said I I I did you I bent down I jumped i doo doo doo doo doo no really I did that I said it I'm not just saying that for y'all I mean I was thought was all in my story some of us are all in our story and I looked at I said they said I couldn't I couldn't be you because I was black they said I couldn't be you because I'd never looked like you and I knew I could never make myself look like you I'd do a lot of things well but I don't do blonde I didn't say that part but I have to say that I have to say that right now I said I I wanted to be you and they wouldn't let me be you and I I began to cry and I as you can see still years later it's still that thing for me and she looked at me with the most gentle beautiful hand she did something like this if he would stand up and just be me she said so right I cried she said sweetheart she said I'm an actress she said I'm in Hollywood she said you with your journey you are the true Bionic Woman and something something shifted that day I I no longer could fit in my own story there becomes a time when you no longer fit in your old story I think that day is today but that there's a new there's a new part to trying to be born for you and it requires you to own every part of the past but on every part of the possibility and on the other side of that the diamonds that will drop out of your mouth the the diamonds that will come birthing from your soul the seeds that will be planted in the harvest that will grow you will be barely recognizable but better than that are the people around you how their lives will shift cuz when you change you is just one person but when you become a force to be reckoned with then your voice permeates over 800 people or so [Applause] [Music] thank you I want to play a piece because we all have past we all have journeys we're all finding ourselves finding our souls finding who we are rediscovering we're all reinventing ourselves but we first have to give ourselves permission to be reinvented we have to give ourselves permission to be rediscovered by us give ourselves permission to fall real hard stay down sometimes too long and still get back up mighty and strong I just believe that that's where you are that's why you're here listening to this message I want you to listen to something I want you to hear something see something it'll sound familiar to you'll know where it comes from and I want this piece to stir your soul to disrupt you because one of the other points of being a powerful messenger is you have to be willing to disrupt and be disrupted so if you will play this piece I have a dream that one day on the Red Hills of Georgia sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi a state sweltering with the heat of injustice sweltering with the heat of oppression will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice I have a dream my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character I have a dream to be I have a dream that one day down in Alabama with its vicious racists with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers I have a dream today what you don't know what most of you don't know is that that's the same man that's set at his dining room table and wrote a letter to God about six years prior to that message and in his letter to God he said I'm scared I'm afraid and I want to give up in this letter I mean it said is the true letter it's the one that's delete the least seen but it's the one that's the most inspiring for me cuz then this letter he says I my father and my mother constantly worry about me I have a new wife he and Coretta had just been married he said I have one beautiful daughter he had only had one child at the time he said in there now throwing bombs through my windows I'm afraid and then the same letter he says I want to quit you don't see dr. King like that huh see that wasn't dr. King sitting at the dining room table that was Martin little Martin he said I'm afraid to keep going but get this he said I'm more afraid that if I stop the people will stop as well are you willing to rise above your own fear storms are you willing to push past your own bare years are you willing to confront and care front your need to be a validated in every moment for the sense of growing who you are are you are you willing to confront procrastination are you willing are you willing to do what Martin had to do every time I read this letter I cry because that's me that letters me I don't know if I'll be that girl I hope to one day I get to touch the world maybe a smidgen of how he does it but I I know that Martin at the dining room table and so do you when I I look at the Nelson Mandela I spent 27 years in prison and came out and let the largest forgiveness movement on the planet but I also realized that that's the same Nelson Mandela that had bust so much limestone year after year day after day hour after hour but he could never look into a camera directly and he could no longer cry because his tear ducts had dried out a sacrifice for the service are you willing are you willing to rise above your wounds and your discomforts and your limitations and see them all as possibility are you willing I I'm your sister in the journey sent here to disrupt any form of mediocracy in you yeah yeah yeah yeah and to call you to use your voice because see when playing small that space where people play small in is so crowded with everybody playing small but that place or change agent stand and then the feet in the face of fear with knees knocking and teeth chatter and they still stand that place is awful Rumi I want to play something else for you because in the spirit of using your voice and my tribe and my crew from yesterday you guys will see and you're seeing today a lot of what I taught you yesterday right you're seeing it you're gonna see it here so when you when you look at elevating yourself as a speaker I say track some people who like poetry cuz poetry has a dance about it you don't have to do poetry you don't have to but track it and then listen to the message then find your own voice in the rhythm that you want I want to share this young man with you very powerful I think it's only fitting that I share him with you after dr. King and you can roll that piece because there's no debate about who is the greatest because all those other artists you mentioned ya the greatest made oh and see this artist he's a beast ally in the name of names you don't even realize it but you encounter his art every day and he deserves all of the acclaim it deserves all of the fame because all other artists pass away but he remains oh by the way his name is God Yahweh creator your maker he's infinitely creative sir there is no one greater and I can tell it looks like you're starting to get mad at me but don't be jealous just because your favorite artist might bend words and my favorite artist bends galaxies see from the palm of his hand he holds all the sand the author of life when he whispered let us make man see what if I told you that you are God's poetry you were created because someone else was creative see long ago he picked up his eternal paintbrush dipped it in his glory placed us in his story and said they would live for me and I know it sounds outlandish but we're not the product of random chances and in fact we're not even the vine we're actually the branches in the same way we're not the artists were actually the canvas I mean he's the one that gave van Gogh the imagination that changed the face of painting tell me who else is responsible for Mozart being able to compose at age five with that form of training so he made the fingers that Beethoven used to make art on the for pizza he made Stevie Wonder went to the best musicians of our time and he couldn't even see and that's why in the same way that our lives are borrowed time this poem is borrowed lines because the most ridiculous statement we could ever say is that this poem is mine because we're not self-sustaining though we're not self creating technically nothing we do is original we're just imitating and that's not a diss all I'm trying to say is this even our own creativity is nothing more than an outflow of his and so I'll end with this you know that quote about giving credit where credit is due well if that's true it's about time we give God his rightful credit - because he's a God in the business of making all things new and here's the truth he's not through with making a masterpiece of you [Music] so so how can you use how can you use that gift that God the universe whatever your higher powers has given you to touch the soul you look at that young man and he's just as powerful as dr. King different platform same message as one so I challenge you and I charge you I challenge you and I charge you to do that thing called you to the best of your ability [Music] I stopped by to invite you to be creative to invite you to be outrageous to invite you to be self forgiving to invite you to celebrate all the parts of your past you are the super hero of your own story you are your own bionic man and Bionic Woman I stopped by to remind you that your voice is so beautiful so necessary and right on time what better time then now [Applause]

Channel: Mindvalley Talks

Views: 443,186

Keywords: tedx, tedx talk, ted talk, lisa nichols motivational speaker, public speaking tips, how to speak up for yourself, how to be heard, best motivational speech, Lisa Nichols Left The Audience Speechless, be inspired lisa nichols, how to inspire yourself, How To Let Your Light Shine Bright Goalcast, lisa nichols life story, lisa nichols steve harvey, lisa nichols on oprah, NEVER BROKE AGAIN, Stepping Into Your Purpose, lisa nichols the secret, abundance now lisa nichols, confidence

Id: zJcaz59ky6k

Length: 37min 18sec (2238 seconds)

Published: Mon Jan 28 2019