Hi everyone, welcome back to Lavendaire. February is going to be all about self love and self care, learning to love
ourselves and take care of ourselves better, from the inside and out. Today we're going to talk about self love and why it's so important, how you can love
yourself better. First of all, it's so important to love yourself
because you have to love yourself first before you can love your life. Also: you have to give to yourself before you can even give back to others. Lucille Ball has this quote. She says: Today's video is a collab with my friend Kajal
Pandey. She is a life coach and self love warrior. She's amazing and she has a video on her channel
about the key to loving yourself, so you can check that out. Also: we have a podcast episode together that
we recorded last year, on self love. It's still really good, it's one of my favorite
episodes to date. I'll post the link below so you can listen
to that as well. But the goal today is to get to a point where
we can fully love ourselves, embrace all that we are, and just feel amazing
about ourselves. And I want to read this quote from my Artist
of Life Workbook on self love: "Designing a beautiful life begins with self
love. Self love breeds self confidence, self worth, self respect, self forgiveness. Do not underestimate its power." My first tip to loving yourself better is
to write a list of all the things you love about yourself. List out all your strengths and your personality
quirks, all the things that you genuinely love and enjoy about yourself. And I know this might be tough for some people because they never thought of it that way,
but a little tip is: if you really don't know what to write, you can ask your closest friends or family
what they love about you, because it might surprise you what good traits
they love about you, so do that. And just find the things that make you, you. Find the things that you really like about
yourself. Next: write a list of your flaws, and I know
this might seem counterintuitive, but the point of learning to love yourself
is learning to embrace everything that you are: your good traits and your weaknesses and your
flaws as well, because we have to realize that we aren't
perfect. We're all human and that's okay. I'm sure you love many people in your life,
like your family members. They're not perfect people. They have flaws too but you still love them. The point is to get to that place where you
can love yourself, flaws and all. Make a list of your flaws and, I know, when
you're doing this you might have a tendency to judge yourself and have negative emotions
come up. Just let it go. Let go of all that judgment, all negativity. And when you're done writing that list, at the bottom, declare to yourself: “It's
okay that I have these flaws. I'm human, I'm imperfect, and that's beautiful. I still love myself, flaws and all.” Really see what this exercise can do for you
in helping you embrace everything that you are, your strengths and your weaknesses, and just
learning to love yourself regardless. The next tip is to level up your self care,
and by that I mean: do whatever it takes to feel amazing every
day, feel your best every day. For example: for me, part of that is waking
up to really good music. That makes me feel great and gets my day off
to a good start. And another part is: I want to put more effort into dressing better,
because I notice when I dress lazy, I don't feel too confident about myself. I feel lazy as well. So take that extra ten minutes to pick out that really nice outfit that you
really love and feel confident in. If makeup makes you feel confident, then take
that extra time to do makeup for yourself. Or maybe you feel more confident and amazing
when you have a bare face. Sometimes I feel great just having no makeup
on because it feels fresh. So do whatever it is that makes you feel amazing,
just take that little extra time to take better care of yourself. The point of this is to enhance your confidence in your everyday life, starting from the outside
in, which does work. You can also build confidence from the inside
out. I have another video that I've made in the past called "How to
Gain Self Confidence" from the inside out. I'll link that below because I don't want
to go into it here, but self care from the outside in, you can really fake it til you make it. You know, you look great on the outside, it will make you feel great on the inside
as well. My next tip is to stop comparing yourself
to others. Do not fall into the comparison trap. Girls, I know this one-even I am very, very
guilty of this sometimes. Sometimes I could be looking at someone else's
YouTube channel like, "Wow. This girl has got it. She's gorgeous. She's growing fast," and I just compare myself when I really shouldn't, because we're all
on our own paths. And it's because we're living in the social
media era where everyone's Instagram is perfect, everyone's life looks gorgeous online, and
you know that's not real. You know behind the scenes, everyone's going
through their own struggle, everyone is a human being. You know no one's perfect, no one's better
than you. And you’re not better than anyone else. We're all just on different paths. We're all unique. And it took me many years to realize that
it's not a competition, because I remember in college, I used to be
comparing myself with other girls and it would make me feel really insecure
about myself. But now I've gotten to a place where I realize that it's not a competition;
it's a community. We're all here to bring our own unique value to the world,
and there's room for everybody. You know, it's not a competition. It's a community. My next tip is to utilize a positive affirmation
or power mantra to enhance your daily life. This is some sort of phrase that declares
how amazing and beautiful and powerful you are. I will read one from my workbook that I wrote: “I am radiant. I am powerful. I am passion. I am worthy. I am love. I am light. I am magical. I am incredible. And I am wildly beautiful.“ You can write whatever you want. Just write something that makes you feel powerful and amazing like you're on top of the world,
and read that to yourself every day. I have a girl named Madeleine in our Workbook
group and what she does is she recorded herself reading all these positive
affirmations and then she plays that recording back to
herself while she's like doing dishes or chores, and it just brings her to another level. I think that's such a great idea. So either keep it on your phone so you can
read it every day, keep it on your wall, keep it at your desk. And try recording yourself saying these things, so you're like your own motivational speaker
every day. My last tip today is to keep a gratitude or
self love journal. Keep a journal where you write down the things you're grateful
for every day. Write down the things you love about yourself
and your life every day. And you'll find that because you have to do
it every day, you'll come up with new ideas, new things to be grateful for, new things
to really love about yourself and your life. Keeping this kind of journal every day pushes
you to be more creative and open your mind to be like, "Okay, what else am I grateful
for? What else do I love about myself and my life?" It challenges you in a good way to make you
appreciate even the little things. I'm grateful that I have an arm and a hand. Things like that that you take for granted
every day, learn to love all of those things. The more that you find in your life to be
grateful for, the more fulfilling your life will feel. And it's just a really nice way to keep track of everything that's amazing in your life. The more you focus on the positive and the
good, the happier you'll feel. There's no way that you could keep a self
love and gratitude journal every day, and not feel good about your life. I don't think it's possible. If you want to prove me wrong, try doing it
for 30 days straight. Write a love letter to yourself every day,
write down your gratitude list every day, and tell me you do not feel better about your
life. Basically, learning to love yourself takes
time, effort, and energy because you're actually building a relationship
and this is the most important relationship you'll ever have in your life: your relationship
with yourself. It's so important. Like I said: love yourself first, and then
everything else will fall into line. You have to love yourself first in order to
love your life, in order to give back and take care of other
people in your life. Alright, I hope you liked today's tips on
how to love yourself better. This is by no means a full list. There are definitely so many more creative
ways that you can learn to love yourself better so if you have any
self love tips of your own, feel free to post them in the description below so all of us can
explore and try to see what works for us. And if you haven't heard already, we have
a new Facebook group called The Lavendaire Lifestyle Community. So click the link right here to join. I'd love to have you guys in there and be
able to connect on a deeper level. Alright, that's it for today's video. I hope you be that kind, loving, and compassionate
person because you have to learn to love yourself
in order to spread love and positivity out in the world. And I truly believe that if everyone learned
how to have full self love, there would be like no bullies and no mean
people in the world. I'm serious about that, so let's spread the love, spread the self
love. Send this video to anyone who might need it, and just do you. Alright, love you guys. Bye!
