If you were a domestic t*rrorist organization
that came under attack by not the CIA, FBI, any alphabet agency, not even the local police,
but by a 16 year old larping as Uma Thurman, what would you do? In this video, we’ll follow a smug 16 year
old girl’s thirst for revenge against a domestic t*rrorist organization called the
Noble Men, run by Stiffler, see if we can make better decisions, and fail miserably
attempting to save everyone from their own idiocy. We start out following Becky, 2 years after
cancer took her mother and 4 Neo N*zis invaded her family’s lakehouse and murdered her
father, after which she, a 16 year old girl, brutally killed them all with flamethrowers,
impalement, boat propellers, and point blank executions. Yah, and I’ll have you know I graduated
at the top of my class in the Navy SEAL’s. This sounds like a nice fairytale she made
herself believe, when in actuality, she was in the fetal position covering her ears while
her dad was getting Saving Private Ryan’d. Apparently they were looking for a key they
had hidden underneath the house, the key she’s now wearing around her neck. Crap, maybe she did kill them all then. Props. Whether she’s wearing it for it’s sentimental
value of loved one’s lost to a senseless tragedy, as a proverbial chip on her shoulder,
or most likely because she’s looking for that long lost treasure chest filled with
10’s of thousands of gold teeth that one of those sneaky Operation Paperclip Germans
brought over with them.. You know some of them did. What, you think they just left them there
for the Russian dogs? Well, judging by her habitual self-inflicted
SERE training from escaping numerous foster homes and ongoing DIY tactical training, my
bet’s on the Juden gold. Admirable. Most 16 year olds would still be moping around,
getting scared by their own shadow, and blaming the Neo N*zis for ruining her life. I mean, they did, and she still blames them
for it as she should. But the difference is, she knows we can’t
change the past, we can only channel our rage toward the future. That’s why our protagonist heroine has conned
and burglarized countless innocent, loving would-be families. So she can stay ‘off the grid and out of
the system.’ Your dad was killed by Neo N*zi thugs, not
Lee Harvey Oswald’s handlers. I don’t even think it’s possible to go
off grid anymore. We’re surveilling uncontacted tribes in
the middle of the Amazon rainforest.. You are running away from your foster parents. Besides, I don’t think you need to ‘go
off grid’ to Nicholas Cage some 1940’s dental gold. That’s like a 6pm-midnight hobby. If you really think the Neo N*zi’s were
a part of a larger group that is actively hunting you down for that key around your
neck, I guess it makes sense? As for the Neo N*zis, maybe a more sensible
option would be to contact a locksmith instead of murdering a bunch of people. I know, I know, but then the locksmith would
report the dental gold. Well, you could just not have him open it? Or since you’re keen to murder people, he
won’t suspect a plastic bag over his head after he pops the lock. Bonus is, a lot less people are going to be
looking into a heavy smoker 60 year old locksmith’s death as opposed to a young white girl from
the burbs with a rich family. This really brings into question the whole
invasion of Becky’s family’s lakehouse for a key. You guys really couldn’t run a simple stakeout
to wait until they were all gone? It’s a lakehouse which people often use
for vacationing. Do I even need to continue here? Back to Becky’s training program. It consists of light jogging, nicking bark
with a knife, rope-climbing, and parkouring into her own traps. All of which is entirely useless for any actual
self-defense situation. Jogging? Hard to do when a 6 foot 220 pound dude grabs
you. Light slashing in close range? Hard to do when a 6 foot 220 pound dude grabs
you. Rope climbing? What is this, freaking Tarzan? Hard to do when a 6 foot 220 pound dude grabs
you. Parkouring into her own traps? Nobody even needs to grab you for that one. Also hard to dude when a 6 foot 220 pound
dude just skeet shoots you out of the sky with a 12 gauge. After her PTSD driven morning routine, she
has breakfast with Elena, her pseudo more permanent foster mom.. I guess? She hasn’t run away from this one, on the
contrary, she’s lived here for a year while working at the local diner. That’s a level of customer service you can
only get from a modern western woman. You viciously berate an older gentleman for
calling you ‘sweet-heart’ when thanking you. ‘Sweet-heart’.. A literal term of kindness, especially coming
from an older generation where it was more commonly used and appreciated, which you should
expect working at an old-time diner. Man’s probably come here multiple times
a week for decades and you ran his arse out. Wasn’t your whole thing about keeping a
low profile? Causing scenes over nothing and constantly
getting fired causing you to move around more seems counterproductive, no? The reason you’re working at this diner
is probably because it’s one of the few that still pays in cash, much of which ‘would’
come from tips if you’d give out more sugar with your pronouncements, toots. Ain’t getting that anymore, especially after
not buttering the man’s toast. No worries, she didn’t actually kill him. It was just a little psycho daydream. The day goes by, she clocks out, goes home,
and plays words with friends with Elena, during which she overhears that the ‘Noble Men’,
an extremist group, may be making an appearance in town tomorrow to protest the upcoming election. And since humans need food, they will also
be making an appearance at the diner. Okay, now that’s disrespectful. This, she lets slide. While washing cups, she overhears them arguing
about the powderkeg of a rally to become mostly peaceful, like last year, which resulted in
a bunch of Noble Men going to prison. This goes on for a good bit, all the while,
the table is noticeably lacking in coffee, which they make the sweetheart behind the
counter aware of. Po’ed about being prompted to do her actual
job, she delivers the coffee, straight to the dudes balls. You could have just spit in it. This was such an obvious attack, I’m almost
surprised he didn’t slap you back into the 50’s to get some manners. Yah, the dude wasn’t particularly nice. He could have said, ‘Excuse me Mrs, would
you fancy delivering me a cup of coffee at your easiest convenience’, but c’mon,
you left tap water on their table while you screwed off. Whatever, I’m not running an etiquette class. The real point is, you just unnecessarily
provoked some good old boys, putting a target on your back when you’re trying to lie low. If that is what you’re trying to do. Which is questionable. Given the lack of treasure hunting in your
off-time, It’s beginning to look more like you’re actually looking for a fight. Which is questionable. Given you're a small year old girl and he’s
a jacked 6 foot 220 pound dude. I hope you at least developed the common sense
to leave out the backdoor today. Nope. Looks like she should have spent less time
on acrobatics and more time watching Nerd Explains. If she did, she wouldn’t have led an obvious
tail to her home.. Unbelievable, you didn’t notice the beat
up redneck truck following your bicycle all the way back? Wow. Your first move is putting your key into a
cookie jar, and hiding that cookie jar under your bed, as if that’s not an extremely
obvious place to check? You have near infinite ways to hide it. Under a loose floorboard, inside a throw pillows
fluff, on-top of a ceiling fan, under a toilet seat lid, in a vent, inside a cutout in a
closet door, under a slit in the carpet, anything better than a jar under the bed, especially
with how clean it is under there, hell, literally just wear it like a necklace like you’ve
been doing for years. If they find you, you probably won’t have
much use for the key afterwards anyways. Because you’ll be dead. Which is really the more important thing you
should be focusing on. Staying alive. That means not walking downstairs to meet
the clear threat empty handed. I for one, am absolutely gobsmacked at this
turn of events. You mean to tell me, after all that light
cardio, Jane Statham over here got whacked this easily? Really testing my suspension of disbelief
here. Becky launches a counter attack, headbutting
Anthony in the face, and commanding her dog Diego to attack. Which goes about how you’d expect.. You really shouldn’t rely on your dog to
fend off multiple armed attackers. Poor Diego. His dumbarse mom provoked some unruly psychos
at the diner, led them back to her home, then pulled him out of his peaceful slumber to
fight a bunch of dudes to the death because she was too stupid to just escape out the
window with him like she’d bragged about doing numerous times in the past. In those fever dream flashbacks she was straight
up blasting dudes in the face with pistols. In that whole encounter when she killed those
Neo N*zis, it should have occurred to her that, “wow, guns make it so much easier
to kill bigger people”, and then kept it for a rainy day like today. Apparently it didn’t, which is why she’s
about to look like one of Captain America’s old punching bags. Or that absolutely mangled UFC fighter chick
that’s been popping up in my shorts feed for some reason. The voice of reason in the polo then says,
no joke, “what happened, I thought we were just gonna ding dong ditch her.” Lmao. Elena interrupts their little revenge plot,
pumping her shotgun to signify that she means business, also signifying that she brought
an unloaded gun to the fight. There’s no way she can rack it fast enough
to take all three, which is why she should back up a bit at least. At the same time, who wants to take the first
hit? Better yet, go back in time and get an AR15. I know they look like big mean scary black
assault weapons of war that need only be found in the hands of soldiers or unscheduled visitors
at schools, but that’s exactly why you want it. It’s effective at engaging multiple targets
in rapid succession due to its ease of aiming, light weight, minimal recoil, fully semi-automatic
function, and 30 rounds at your disposal. That’s 10 per jackarse here. What I’m saying is if I come downstairs
and see this tussle, and the gunman doesn’t immediately drop the gun and start kissing
his arse, I’m smoking him, and then the other 2. They broke into your house, slugged your doggo,
pointed a gun at your foster daughter’s head, and refused to cooperate with hands
not where I can see them. It’s 3v1 which is too much information to
process, especially for an elderly lady with bad eyesight and worse reflexes. You have every right to shoot first and ask
questions later. Anthony calls the bluff on the old lady's
reaction time. Oof. That’s another notch on Becky’s belt. At a certain point, you have to realize you’re
the common denominator here and evaluate your actions. Just saying, bodies seem to be falling wherever
she goes.. And we’re just getting warmed up. As for the Noble Men, this is why you kidnap
girls while they’re riding back home on their bicycles, not after they go inside and
lock the door. Then you have to breach it quietly, deal with
family members with guns, dogs, unknown building layouts, and home security systems. Duh. I honestly can’t believe they didn’t account
for the fact that someone else had to be paying for this home, and thus lives here, which
you hadn’t assessed or dealt with. 35 year olds can't buy homes, and you think
this girl, a diner waitress, who’s certainly not collecting any fat tips, is just chillin
here like Preston Waters? Freaking idiots. I will say, that was a great shot. I mean can we be honest here, that was an
excellent shot, drawing from felony carry with a shotgun aimed in his direction. YOU GOTTA RESPECT IT Becky’s having a hard time appreciating
his marksmanship, bum-rushes Anthony, and gets her face diverted into a door frame. The next morning Becky wakes up, not dead
for some reason. Why the cold blooded murderers left alive
the only witness that could identify them, I have no idea.. All you had to do was put a trash bag over
her head for a few minutes. Bing bang boom problem solved. The only thing that’d probably get you is
your blood on her hair, so drag her arse to a sink, wash it with some bleach real quick,
g2g. You might be questioning whether they have
time for this? Well, indoor gunshots aren’t as loud or
distinct as you’d think. I’ve literally been in the other room of
a house when a shotgun was fired and it just sounds like a big thud. If you’re a house over playing video games
you won’t hear crap. In the movie nobody even showed up, which
I’d say is very accurate. As far as the bullet being traced back to
the perps gun, the short answer is, not gonna happen, especially if they don’t have the
gun, and especially if it’s a stolen gun, which it most likely is. The bad news is, Diego’s missing. He probably bounced thinking screw this, Becky’s
dumbarse is going to get me killed. Okay, so you’re not going to take any responsibility
for this at all. Not even a little bit? Really? No matter, this was what Becky wanted all
along. A fight to her death. That’s why she’s in the shed piling gardening
equipment into a box, pocketing bear mace, and snagging Wernher von Braun’s masterkey
from her cookie jar. Oh and eyeliner and nail polish. So she packs up her ‘stuff’ and heads
to the first of the two Derrels in this town. Derrel is a name the thugs dropped at the
diner btw. The first is an old lady. She only realizes this after walking up to
the house and knocking on the door. Great strategy. What were you planning on doing if the door
opened and it was the three thugs aiming a gun at your head? Right. Didn’t think that far, did ya. The second, is the Noble Men headquarters,
as evidenced by the flag out front. Inside, is a bunch of boring conversations
with their leader, Stifler. They’ve got Becky’s dog all caged up. Why? To torment Becky I guess? Look, you’re all obviously trying to make
a good impression with King Stiffler, leader of the extremist resistance or something,
so maybe leaving Becky alive and stealing her dog wasn’t a good idea considering you
could very well be bringing heat to your cause. Have we not learned anything from John Wick? I’m not saying Becky is gonna Jane Wick
them, but she could easily have reported the murder, provided DNA evidence, names, descriptions,
and a lead on where they might be, which is here. Lucky for them, she’s taking matters into
her own hands. Sneaking around the house perimeter in bright
red. Lucky for her, the Stiffmeister conveniently
left out video game blueprints to his assassination plot on Senator Hernandez. Becky starts snapping pics when Darryl leads
Sean into his office, forcing Becky to hide under the couch. A completely freaking horrible spot given
the open window, that you opened, and utterly clear view of you in your stupid bright red
uniform by anyone entering the room. While the mini ninja is under the couch, Derryl
tells Sean an enlightening, rhetorical story about how back in Iraq he had to choke a kid
to death who was about to blow their op. Cool story, bro. If you’re so skeptical about Sean’s loyalty,
why did you show him the NobleMen blacklist with names, addresses, and identifying information
of all the key disciples? Pretty stupid if you ask me. You can tell your favorite story about murdering
brown kids in Iraq to intimidate Polo, without exposing all the members of your organization.. Sean answers with the technically correct
answer. No, then excuses himself abruptly. At this point, as Sean, you have to know you’re
most likely going to be taken out back in the near future unless you can sack up and
prove yourself by killing a kid too or something. When Daryll drags Becky out by her hair like
Wardaddy did that SS guy, you better not wimp out like Norman unless you want to join her
in the dirt. Speaking of weak links, Darryl also conveniently
left his laptop open, unlocked, with the super secret blacklist in full view. Bro, your OpSec is trash. Why are you leaving critical information out
all over the place? How hard is it to put it in a safe or close
your password protected laptop and pocket the thumbdrive? Naturally, Becky pockets the thumbdrive, bolts
to their shed, and just stumbles upon a goldmine of guns, gear, and explosives.. That apparently Weak Link didn’t lock up
at all. Didn’t even shut the door. What an insane bout of sheer luck. Go Becky! Now, does she know how to use any of it? No. Sure, in her PTSD-cope induced false memories
she heroically mowed down a bunch of Neo N*zis. As far as we’ve seen, she has zero training
with firearms. I'm sure that’s not going to stop her from
hip firing a belt med machine gun with plot-accuracy. Firearms training aside, Becky has shown a
fatal lack of common sense, basic self awareness, or any real tactical knowledge. She’s bloodthirsty, arrogant, unprepared,
untrained, and ignorant to the fact that she’s a child playing out some made up Kill Bill
fantasy. The only reason she’s still alive right
now, is pure luck. Her plan: Ding dong ditch them, leave a phone
ringing at their doorstep with her name on the Caller ID, and destroy any element of
surprise she had. Smart. Okay, let me stop you right there Misses Punisher. The One batch two batch penny and dime crap
was intimidating because it was coming from a highly trained, experienced, brutal ex-special
forces pipe-swinging badarse. You’re not. It sends them all into a tizzy, Daryll telling
Anthony to go get the girl. Exactly how Becky planned… She wanted Anthony to follow her along into
the forest, with him at her back just feet away, knowing that despite having every reason
to, he won’t just shoot her in the back of the head, because then His psycho friend
and child murderer leader will hear it.. Well, that was stupid. How did you drop your gun? Whatever, this hole really shouldn’t be
that hard to jump and claw your way out of, then you can strangle her to death. On Becky’s side, she’s lucky he actually
plunged in face first. He easily could have skidded a foot and fallen
backwards or turned around in time to catch the edge Luke Skywalker time, then shot her
immediately. Instead, somehow, Becky was able to bind him,
put a grenade in his mouth, tape it shut, lead him to the house, then string the nade
to the door. Even holding him at gunpoint, I don’t see
how anyone would agree to any of this. This time her ding dong ditch was a little
more.. Explosive.. This sends everyone into another Tizzy, specifically,
Sean. Sean picks this moment, when Daryll is holding
them at gunpoint, to say ‘scew this, screw the noblemen, and screw you you psychomother- Yah, that wasn’t smart. Becky could simply leave an anonymous tip
to the police and be done, assuming she used a burner phone to make the calls to the NobleMen,
which I don’t think she did judging by her yellow Iphone. You know she’s too bloodthirsty for that. Daryll and Becky get on a call. Daryll threatens to shoot her dog if she doesn’t
duck off, Becky says if they do she’ll send his documented plans to attack town hall to
the cops. It’s a stalemate. The hick tries to end it by grabbing his shotgun
and standing completely in the open on the dock with his thumbs up his arse. Right after Daryll rips it out of his face,
he hastily charges back out to kill her. Instead of physically stopping Twig himself,
Daryll walks back inside and yells at the dude whimpering in the corner to stop him. Which is dumb because Twig is far more likely
to settle down if it’s coming from Daryll than some punk he doesn’t know or respect. It’s also dumb because in the minutes Twig’s
been running after Becky, Twig could’ve easily killed her. Becky nearly gets blown away twice. Again, lucking out that Twiggy is too stupid
to 1. Pump the shotgun before needing to fire, and
2. Not announce himself before needing to fire. I don’t understand, was this your plan,
Becky? It really looks like you’re just reacting
and trying to improvise. Maybe, don’t use yourself as bait if you
don’t actually have a plan? Oh wow, look at that totally unnecessary combat
roll (59:30). What a badarse.. She nearly gets blown away a third time while
in the fetal position. It’s okay, she’s got him right where she
wants him. Coulda just tossed another frag grenade. If Twig had any semblance of intelligence
he’d have simply kicked it back towards her and regressed through the door he just
closed, waited outside for her to come out eventually, then gun her down. This guy is certifiably stupid. Just standing right on top of the grenade
billowing out gas sucking air in with each hillbilly war cry as he empties his shotgun
blindly. After sucking in enough gas, he’s reduced
to his knees, pleading for mercy, begging to let him raise his son to be a good man
unlike him. She asks him what his son’s name is. His response: Really dude, why on Earth, would you pick
now to tell the truth. Well, it goes about how you’d expect. Her emotional bloodthirst for vengeance blinded
her to the catastrophic tactical mistake of forgetting that there are at least 2 other
killers coming after her, and she’s been making her location pretty well known. Stiff hits her with the most powerful tranq
gun on the market. She wakes up strapped to a chair in front
of Daryll. All things considered, he’s pretty chill. He goes through her stuff, pulling out that
key. Funny enough, in the few minutes it’s been
in his possession, he figured out how to unlock it, revealing coordinates inscribed on it. Becky had that what, 2-3 years? Lmao. In another surprise event. The old lady on the O2 named Daryll she met
at the first house, yah that’s actually the founder of the NobleMen and Darylls mother.. It’s another stalemate. Becky knows where their only super important
thumb drive is. If she tells them, they kill her. If she doesn’t tell them, they torture and
kill her dog, then torture her until she is so desperate for them to mercy kill her that
she voluntarily coughs up the correct answer. There’s a reason torture has been used for
thousands of years. It works. Your best option is to make it easy on yourself. No point in getting your eyes gouged out and
skin flayed off to just give up the answer anyways. Second thought, that doesn’t really sound
like a stalemate. That sounds like hell. Becky’s answer: Ooh. That’s not going to go well. I’d have gone for more of a, “I’m just
a little girl who's lost it all.” in hopes that they don’t fluck me up as
bad before they kill me. Lucky for Becky AGAIN, Daryll didn’t tie
her up properly. Bro, you had all night. I could have done a better job with a roll
of duct tape that she would not be getting out of. Also, that’s why you tie her hands separately
to the arms of the chairs in plain view. None of this loose knot behind her back out
of view bullcrap. Just all around egregious, and in no way should
Becky have been able to get free in any realistic encounter. Oh, eff off. Daryll, you don’t need 20/20 to thumb her
eyes and strangle her to death. This is your thing. You’re really going to go to the little
girls room instead of subduing Becky? You just left your frail arse mom to fight
on her own. God dangit. Momma Daryll pulls a gun on Becky, but takes
her eyes off the target to put a hole in the pooch. What the freak is that going to accomplish? You shooting her dog won’t make her fess
up any better than killing her. What you need to do right now is subdue Becky. Keep the gun on her until your son finishes
changing his tampon. Becky then uses her absurdly scarce available
time while Daryll is washing up to talk with her dog, NOT picking up the gun or knife,
and runs out of the house, leaving said dog in the house with the p*ssed off guy with
the gun, instead of blasting him when he opens the bathroom door. Brace yourselves, it gets dumber. Daryll chases Becky into the woods, forgoing
all of his special forces training, firing wildly and innaccurately with his double stack
pistol that he apparently only loaded 6 rounds into. It runs empty, he stops to look at it, then
tosses it. It’s okay, he catches up to her anyways. Because she clearly stopped and let him, with
a tree right next to her that has a clear red smiley face marking she designated. This doesn’t set off any battle instincts
in his head. Instead of simply shooting her with the loaded
gun he should have had still, he steps forward confidently. Sigh.. I think it’s that smug look on her face. Like she’s not an idiot that has only survived
on sheer luck. After watching him die slowly, she pockets
the key, grabs diego, and what the freak. The mom is still alive haha. Holy crap. She’s tough, I’ll give her that. Problem is, that knife is really messing with
her aim. A couple days later, Becky is sitting in some
CIA office getting a job offer to hunt down, and I quote, ‘the most dangerous terrorist
organization in America.” Doing what they have been unable to do for
years. Let me translate, what they have been legally
unable to do until they found a naive loose cannon to do their dirty work that they could
pay under the table for deniability and kill off when they need to tie up loose ends. At least, I sincerely hope that’s the case
and they don’t truly think she’s an employable member of the CIA’s counterterrorism unit. Becky accepts in her signature, “I'm a rebel
bad bitch’ way. Fine, now where’s my dog.” I for one, cannot wait for her luck to run
out. I got nothing, except, why did she give up
that key? I can see handing the thumb drive over, but
the key? Shove it up your arse or something so the
CIA doesn’t steal the loot. Oh well, guess she doesn’t need it considering
her new high paying job as Jason Bourne’s replacement. Daryll and the NobleMen had so many chances
to put Becky into an early grave it was downright egregious that she survived. And for that reason.. I think the Wrath of Becky was Beaten.
