Speaker: This question
is from Deepika, “Sadhguru, you said in
one of the darshans that you are, you should treat everyone,
just as you treat, treat me. Sadhguru you are
a karuna avatar. But I have one inhuman,
nasty creature in my home. It becomes difficult to see you in him,
how to deal with him in this situation? Sadhguru: In how many years of marriage
does this evolution happen? Or it's a devolution. I'm sure he was a wonderful,
romantic, wonderful man at one time. I don't know in how many years of
marriage does he become a nasty creature? And how much role you have in
making a nasty creature? See, especially if he is nasty
creature, especially if it is so, this is your perception. But especially if somebody is
a nasty creature in your home or in your office or wherever you are. You're seeing something in a
certain way is not about them. It's about you. Do you want to keep your eyes,
your mind, your heart, your body, pleasant or unpleasant?
You make up your mind on that one. Now, if you look at him,
I said even that nasty creature, please look at him.
It's like me. I'm not telling you that: you have to listen to his teachings
or take new practices from him. No, I'm saying, if you have looked at me with a certain
sense of reverence, devotion, love, affection,
whatever is your emotion. If you have, please see everything
with that, because all I'm saying is: you have a body, you have a
mind you have an emotion, energy we're talking about
your emotion right now. If you hit a certain level of sweetness
of emotion, at one point in your life, either because of your love or
devotion or compassion or whatever, you hit a certain
level of sweetness. This is the high
point in your life. Now you should not come back from that
you must see how to go beyond that. I am saying whatever
was the highest or the sweetest or the most
wonderful emotion you had make that the baseline.
Why are you coming back again? If you did not know such an
emotion, then what would I tell you? Which is the sweetest
emotion you had in your life? My child, okay, see,
everybody as your child. We’ve told you that at one time. Then I saw you sat here with tears of
blissfulness and love coming out of you. Then I said, see everybody as
you're looking at me, right now. Because this will make your
eyes, your mind, your heart, your body and your very
being sweet and wonderful. This is not about him. Especially if he's
being difficult. Then you're being well trained. Even if you go to hell you
will do well. Yes. Because nobody has
guaranteed you. Have I ever told you,
“I will get you a ticket to heaven?” I've been constantly threatening
you, “Right here things will happen”. So, you must understand this
is about your transformation. The problem with you is because you read,
what are those? Well, I don't want
to take names anyway. You did, read all those romantic
books when you're a teenager and then you imagined
all kinds of things. You're not first of all
straight with yourself. Your hormones are working up. Suddenly you look at
somebody, “Wow! I can't believe she's so
beautiful. She's so fantastic. He's so handsome.
He is so wonderful. Everything he does, ah.” You're
bullshitting yourself. No, no. Whatever they do,
you make you yourself beautiful. Now even if they're doing nasty
things, you're still wonderful. This is different. You know, they're doing nasty
things, and you're still wonderful. This is fantastic. They are doing nasty things, but you
think they're doing beautiful things. This is a stupid nonsense. I’ll tell you, somebody who was serving
in Indian Army told me this story because we went through a
similar situation somewhere else. So at that time,
he was narrating this. They were posted in the
north-eastern region where there's a certain
amount of elephant population. So he is a battalion leader, he's heading
about a group of eighteen to twenty people, I think they are marching in the
forests and they see a huge tusker, everybody backs off all of them have weapons,
okay, powerful weapons. This is anti-insurgency group that
means they are fully armed and equipped. They can shoot down a tusker from hundred
meters, two-hundred meters, whatever they want. But they all back off because that's
not the reason why they are there. But he was telling me this because this some situation happened
like this with one South Indian person, so suddenly there was one Tamil
man in the thing who was a sergeant, Havildar, he put his weapons
down and he said, “Ganapathy has come. Ganesha, Ganesha!” and he
started chanting a mantra. He knew some Ganapathy
mantra, he started chanting, he ran in front and he went close
to the elephant just fifty feet away and went down on his knees and
started loudly saying the chant, the elephant looked at him,
“Who is this bloody fool?” You know, calling him all kinds of
names that he doesn't like. And these people were watching,
this is some kind of a miracle happening. The elephant is just standing there and
this guy's on his knees chanting, the elephant moved so quickly
and within less than two seconds, or within probably five
seconds, he was upon him, he just crushed him,
turned back and went. These people were just aghast and
they just watching him being crushed. Then some people pulled out the
weapons when the person whom I knew, was in charge of it he calmed them down
because it's already dead. The man is dead in one shot. Why I'm saying this to you
is: elephant will not do, wild elephant is not going to do pleasant
things to you because you call him a god. You call him Ganapathy
and try to worship him. He's not going to do,
he will do what he has to do. Similarly,
the creature in your house. He will do what he has to do.
Whatever is his characteristic. It is just about you.
I'm talking. You're always thinking of
life as a relationship. No, no,
I want you to understand, before you were born,
or even when you were being born you did not have a
relationship even with your mother. This is going to
be very unpopular. People are going to pick on
me, but please look at it. You don't have a relationship. You just have an existence. Relationship happened because of your needs,
you saw her as your food, you went for her you saw her as
the basis of your survival. You recognized that quickly, you
know, the moment a child is born, hand her over to another
man or another woman, and let them take care of all
the child's needs, child will immediately go to them. This whole idea that you
think it's coming to you because you're the mother
and you delivered, no, it is because of
the needs you form relationships. Otherwise there
is just existence. This existence can either
become conscious and live in a phenomenal presence
and become available to it. Or just do or go on
doing the circus. Initially, your mother was everything.
She was the most fantastic creature and then you grew up, you became
an adolescent and you saw a boy, he was the most fantastic
man, in the world, then your mother came in between
suddenly you started hating her. Hello. Then the man came,
he was most beautiful. Then he became a nasty
creature, or so you thought. Now you think he's the worst human
being, this goes on. I want you to understand you're
making up both beauty and nasty. I am not asking you to make up. I am not asking you to think whatever
this person is doing is fantastic. That's a stupid way to exist. It's just that if you see everything,
whatever is the peak experience you had, make that the baseline,
this is growth. You played the snake and the ladder
game, choing, choing, chisk, You played that game?
Snake and the ladder game. So when you play this game,
your intent is once you climb a ladder, you don't want to come back.
You don't want to hit a snake. You want to find another
ladder, another ladder go up, that's a natural expression of life. So once you know a certain level of
sweetness, within you, don't bring it down. That should be the basis. The next thing should
be better and better. So when I said, every, right now you were
sitting here with tears of ecstasy and love like this with me, then I
said, “Let this be the basis. Don't go down from this. See everything as this.” At
least let this much happen. If this is continuously
happening, constantly happening, then of course you
will hit another ladder. Just a little bit of time. Don't come down.
That's all I said. And please don't describe him as a nasty
creature, poor man. This happened,
I think I told you, maybe one of these days only I told you,
I don't remember but let me repeat this, Shankaran Pillai thought his wife is
having an affair, hired a detective. I'm saying it loudly because just to remind
you, said, “I want proof against her”. So detective just waited outside the
house, the she left the house. He followed her. Then she went to,
parked near a park, went inside. A man was sitting on the bench. The moment he saw her, he came running,
she went running, they hugged each other held hands and sat down on the bench
and chatting away joyfully, laughing. He took the whole video
and within a few hours, he came to Shankaran
Pillai in his office and said, “I got all the proof that you
wanted, just in one day. I did my job. I have the
proof, here watch the video”. Shankaran Pillai started
watching the video and said “No, I can't believe this. No, no,
this can't be, I can't believe this. No, I can't believe this.” He said,
“What you Can't believe? It's a video. It's not doctored. It's just a video
that I took just now.” He said, “That's not the point fool,
I can't believe she's so much fun.” So after fifteen days is over,
when the man goes away somewhere, then you will see
how much fun he was. Don't do this to
yourself.
