How I Finished My Gaming Backlog (One Year Later)

November 18th 2022 I upload this video to YouTube and in it I make a declaration that in one year's time my gaming backlog would be completed this list this nearly 90 games meticulously curated for my interest measured for time to beat at just over 1,600 hours and organized neatly into a live spreadsheet that you all could check up on throughout the year I vowed would be finished and you don't need to go watch that video before watching this one you can it'll make this one a bigger payoff but I'll recap what's important now the gaming backlog is not something most people seriously talk about ever finishing right there's always going to be more games and if anything we joke about the absurdity of just how big hours is getting especially with what like eight realistic game of the year contenders this year but despite the odds I couldn't put up with the shame of having never played a Resident Evil game before I was tired of being told to play outer Wilds I was ready to finally get to more of those weeb games that make me way too emotional I wanted this thing empty so that I could feel feel lighter and so the oneye younger me set out to finally conquer the unconquerable that stupid and now here we are November 2023 my time is up here's what I've done I have meticulously taken notes all year my thoughts on each game recorded diligently as I've played them here I am in February gushing about how Portal 2 might be the perfect game here's a log from July my first time with Mass Effect where I describe it as Star Trek with balls in March the last of us another game I'd somehow never played and remained unspoiled to reminded me of evacuating from a hurricane as a child there are also notes taken about my general thoughts on this method some of which make sense others other others others not so much also don't forget chocolate tornado what is chocolate tornado why am I not meant to forget it I wrote this I also have stats I spend SP an average of 13.5 hours per game but only the games that I actually beat if you factor in the ones I decided to stop playing then hang on you guys probably have questions right were you able to finish it what did you play should I try this too I'll answer all of that we're going to have fun but I want to be real with you for a second I rewatched last year's video in preparation for writing this one because it's been so long and so much has happened that I don't remember exactly what I promised you then and um one thing that stuck out to me is this question that was never answered would it make you feel better to finish your gaming backlog is it worth it that's finishing the list to bring happiness do I feel better will you if you do this and I think that's the ultimate question I would like to answer today we will talk about what I played what I liked what about this method worked what didn't the data I collected Etc but quite simply I want to tell you a story and to do that we have to start here the first thing to get out of the way is that I cheated a little bit I got to head start the first game I play on the backlog is Xenoblade Chronicles and I actually finish it in October but I consider it the first game in the backlog because it is the one that inspired me to do this it is a game that I shed a tear to that genuinely feels like a journey it is unquestionably a man game which is why this is the spark that ignited the storm I put myself through this year storm chocolate tornado was that no that can't that that doesn't seem right what I love about Zen blade is that it's a weird gpg plot that actually makes sense usually these plots go something like this where as time goes on your questions increase and then just kind of but zener blade 1 actually makes a nice pry graph where it all comes together in the end I remember my jaw genuinely dropping when I realized what exactly this world was if you know you know and so with that that being done and my heart filled with joyous foolish ambition it was on to [Music] November God of War is next on the docket and this is not only to appease my fomo from everyone talking about it back in 2018 it is also to touch the series for the first time ever my only memory of Kratos is watching my cousin play this back in the day but instead what I get is a quiet moving exploration of Boyhood fatherhood and confronting the things about ourselves that we never want to see in our children this game is beautiful and it works for me for two reasons one I know this is the Kratos of the past and kind of nothing else as I play It's almost like his reputation The Whispers of his past that followed him around in the game had found their way into the real world to me I know you're a God not of this realm but there's no mistaking it I know what a lot of the NPCs know that Kratos was a bad bad man but not really why he was this makes for a nice harmony with the narrative as I play the other reason is that atraeus had also never played God of War so every time he asks a question I'm like yeah what about that actually I am honored to have played this it's a man game Ragnarok is added to the list next is Pokemon Scarlet H you've seen this movie before let's fast forward finally I end the month with a short little indie game called detention which was developed by the same Studio behind devotion another game that's on this list that I've heard a lot about so I figure detention is gas and it's well it is gas but it's like Safeway gas you probably don't want to stop here unless you have to it's a little point-and-click horror game with no shortage of unsettling gorgeous just imagery the soundtrack works the narrative works the enemies work a little too well they are frightening but like the thing in s it's only scary the first time and then it just kind of sours into an annoyance I want to love this but I only like it and the same can be said of my progress on the backlog as this cold November draws to a close I am happy with what I played but at only four out of 85 games done already about three games behind Pace how can I not feel behind but it's fine I tell myself I had to make the backlog video itself this month I'll have more time in the coming months I would not have more time okay before we continue I've got to pay the bills this video is brought to you by manscaped gentlemen around the holidays we spare no expense for those that we love we show our gratitude for them by buying them gifts spending time with them and showing up at their house to eat all of their food so why don't you show the same appreciation for your family jewels with the new lawnmower 5 .0 Ultra from manscaped personal grooming is one of the best ways to show yourself some love and this absolute Beast of a machine from manscaped will make that process seamless with the lawnmower 5.0 Ultra they have prioritized comfort and ease with dual skin safe blade heads upgraded trimmer blade and interchangeable foil blade for enhanced performance the upgraded trimmer is longer wider Trimmier meant to handle business in less passes and the foil blade captures even the finest peskiest hairs all while respecting those delicate areas and thanks to an attached LED this bad boy even lights the way so that you can see what you're doing even if you're in the shower water won't stop you so head on over to manscape.com and show yourself some gratitude with the new lawnmower 5.0 Ultra today and don't miss out on 20% off plus free international shipping at checkout when you use the promo code Daryl at checkout that's 20% off plus free shipping with promo code Daryl manscaped.com believe me Lads your balls will thank you thanks again to manscape for sponsoring now back to the show you know what's refreshing around the holidays a little bit of radioinduced possession Ox andfree is a spooky little graphic novel Style game with multiple endings and decisions that matter and all that good I want video games that hurt me energy I enjoy this one the interactions between characters feel natural the conversations dance instead of March the responses you choose feel in character for who you're playing as and as the player which is hard to pull off how many times have you been given dialogue options and thought cool so I guess I'm an in this scene oxenfree is great on to the next I would now like to read to you the first sentence of my thoughts on IE the somnium files last December what the the stupidest game I have ever played in yet somehow I absolutely loved every second of it there are games out there that produce weird fan bases this is a game that feels like it is produced by a weird fan base it knows it's silly it doesn't take itself too seriously it doesn't rush and because of these some of the plot twists and bigger moments kick my legs out from under me and hit me with the people's elbow and the way it hides the true killer all along is absolutely bonkers the voice acting was top and damn it I I want to tell you about the somnium but time's it taking play time's over let's begin death's door yeah baby this game knows how to get down it feels like a dark Wind Waker but with difficulty that will sneak up on you and become super tough in the Final Act it is witty it is charming it is tight mostly I have a few of those I swear to God I hit roll spots but you know how those go oh and there's this icy floor area where you slide around and certain heavy moves that are generally unsafe become safe here because you can hit them as you slide away out of danger like this okay moving on less than 11 months left next is Fury a game that just doesn't agree with me for some reason I didn't write much about it the first first two bosses make me feel like a superhero when I finally figure them out but when I get to this Shield guy I just can't seem to find a rhythm after a few failed attempts I abandon it this is the first game I don't rule credits on which if you remember from last year I made it clear I don't have to beat everything that is a piece I'm allowing for myself I tried to give myself a break but it still bothers me a bit hey current day Daryl here sorry to interrupt if I could just interject here really quick I do need to pay a compliment into this spreadsheet method one thing I was concerned about playing all these games back to back was that they would sort of just start to blur together and I wouldn't remember a ton of them but as I'm sitting here writing the script looking at a bundle of games I played in a rush a year ago uh I I remember the details of them all shockingly well because I did take the time to write about them I did this for every what was that I never wrote about D and Rober 2 but other than that I did this for every game I played there is research suggesting that writing consolidates memory so one thing to take away if you are considering doing your backlog like this is writing your thoughts about each game you play once you finish I really think it'll help you process and more accurately recall your adventure later for me not only did it do that but it made me feel all warm and fuzzy remembering how it felt to go on that Journey it ensured it wasn't just another game on the list it preserved it as a fond memory to look back on anyways back to December Fury is behind me now I shake off the [Music] disappointment next it's on to Final Fantasy 9 and you just know that this one is a banger of all the final fantasies I had on the list this is the one that everyone said to keep so I dove right into this hustling bustling world to find out what yeah I uh I I quit this one after like 3 hours and that's that that really does bother me but it is slow I get stuck in this town for the longest time trying to run errands essentially until the game finally lets me start the adventure battles are slow to load tents don't heal Fallen party members which I guess is is a throwback to older final fantasies I just quickly grow tired of wrestling with it to let me have the fun I am expecting meanwhile and probably more relevant to my decision to abandon December is coming to a close and I have barely gotten through five games merry Christmas everybody okay it's a new year to health resolutions let's make a bad decision right out the gate I add more games to the backlog I see a sale on Steam that reminds me of a series somehow none of you recommended to me back in that original backlog optimization stream and that series is Portal having never touched either both of them are added I play them back to back I fall in love I won't spend too long here because everyone has had over a decade to love and char cherish these but man historically puzzle games have not been for me and yet this game somehow makes me adore them it's so infinitely clever both in its design and in its writing GLaDOS is easily one of the best villains in a game ever Portal 2 might be the perfect game as I hinted at earlier and I'm still grining at the part where he kills us well this is the part where he kills us hello this is the part where I kill you had a bit of a brain wave that I was how have I never played this then it was [Music] time in case you missed it I not only played this last January but the following month I made an extensively in-depth video about it I've said enough about ad wild at this point it is quite simply a gift and unquestionably a man game three games down and the month is is still young at this point I really want to keep the momentum going but as many people have reported to me in the past I am also having a tough time deciding what to play next choice paralysis is unmerciful there is so much to pick from and this is the first of several times this year where I am immensely grateful for having data about each game listed on this spreadsheet it suddenly makes choosing the next game a simple process of elimination first of all do I own the game I've already a bunch of money on magic gathering this month so let's settle on something I have second how long of a game am I looking for I've got to get started on a script so maybe something not too big I've already done puzzles and space exploration maybe something a little less involved it doesn't take me long to arrive at a decision and thanks to this method it doesn't take me long the entire year having this data is helpful if you want to do this make sure you have it it's your sword and shield against choice paralysis and Along Comes The Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe a game I'd seen a little bit of and was under the impression it would be pretty short but I am shocked to find myself falling deeper and deeper into this Whirlpool of a meta narrative it's one of the few games you'll hear me say this about today I've never really played anything quite like it there are no comparisons four games down I start Catherine full body and then abandon it about 2 hours in I watched my friend play it way back in the day and in the process of researching a video last year I was spoiled to all of the endings and yeah wouldn't you know it suddenly not interested in finishing I blink and then January comes to a close I have touched what five games I didn't know how many would end up on the backlog at the time once new releases were factored in and other ones were added on a whim like portal but I knew that it was going to be in the neighborhood of 90 meaning I needed to be putting away 7 to eight games a month and for the third straight month that had not happened I am chronically behind Pace this Behemoth of a list is still snorting and sweating just over my shoulder but all I can do is move forward February will be better surely but Channel work begins to steadily pick up I forced myself to address a drastic miscalculation allow me to take you through my typical workday to illustrate a point 4:45 a.m. I wake up and from 5: to 7:00 I either go work on a video or play a game depending on how pressing the next video's release date is at 700 I take my two dogs out and feed them then I log into my work from home day job not many of you know this but YouTube is not fulltime for me yet so from 7:00 to 4:00 borrowing an hour lunch break I can neither play games nor work on videos in the evenings between being a husband caring for the dogs running errands and cooking dinner I can usually find around two solid hours to myself the weekends are always a wild card but typically this is where I get most of my YouTube work done there is often time for gaming but it just depends on how much household stuff we have to do then how much YouTube stuff I have to do then I can potentially play a game this is the real culprit behind my abysmal Pace I assert one morning as i gaze at the wall of titles at600 hours I need over 4 hours a day to complete everything I pointed this out last year if 3 weeks out of the month I have to prioritize video production you see the problem I can tell how on Earth did I not panic begins to set in it's February maybe by next November everyone will have just forgotten about this maybe I'll just push the follow-up video back maybe I no there's still a way something has to give and so something will in a desperate attempt to keep Pace whether consciously or perhaps subconsciously I do the only thing I can I play games and I don't finish them my patience for Observer is extremely thin this is a cyberpunk detective game and I can't figure out how to progress past the first room I abandon it after a confusing hour I give prey a chance the opening is Sensational this is how you open a game wish I had played this before the elevator video and then a few hours in I just my enthusiasm vaporizes the combat is vexing Me Maybe Shooters aren't my thing I wonder there was a moral conundrum with a prisoner that I find especially remarkable but then I get one-shotted by an electrical plug I've had enough skill issue I know but abandoned Luigi's Mansion 3 is cute but the flavor of it turns to Ash on my tongue 2 hours in abandoned and then finally in the highlight of the month dishonor 2 makes me realize that stealth [Music] games are harder than fromsoft games it is clear that dishonor 2 is brilliant the Clockwork Mansion is incredible shorting out the Clockwork soldiers and making them do my Dirty Work makes me feel almost as cool as that time in BioShock when I made two big daddies fight each other but I don't have the patience to finish it out the plot is completely lost on me as I have never played to Dishonored one every time haunted Zachary Quinto comes on screen I innocently smile lost as a puppy watching a chess match maybe I'll revisit this someday maybe I'll enjoy it more if I play them in the right order abandoned hey current day Daryl again uh in hindsight if you're planning to plot out your backlog like I did this section may not be the best advice for how you know when it's time to abandon a game what you're seeing here is stress induced Hasty decision-making and knowing when it's time to quit a game is a delicate art but in reality I think it's different for everyone never feel like you owe it to a game to try x amount of it though if you weren't feeling it you don't have to explain yourself it's meant to be fun and if you feel like you've given it a fair shot and it's not that let it go oh and don't be ashamed of walkthroughs if you need a little bit of help I think one of those would have helped me with a lot of these games because they'll come in handy in a few months when I get impatient for some games that I'm super grateful I finished so yeah give games what you feel like is enough with the exception of Dishonored I don't think I did that here I hope you can learn from my mistakes okay back to February me it is at this point that I decide to edit the backlog a bit because my patience is at an all-time low I scrap Spirit fair and Kirby in the Forgotten Land from the list because I suddenly realize I have absolutely no desire to play them despite a handful of recommendations something has broken in me this February my give a damn crops are beginning to wilt from this long winter I'm disappointed in myself but I can't help but notice a tiny Ripple of Peace wash over my soul at seeing these two rows deleted I replace resi 4 with resi 4 remake because it looks delightful but feels silly to play both games I add signalised replace Spirit fer on account of actually being interested in it February draws to a close I'm drowned in work and despite playing a handful of things I don't beat a single game the entire month I decide that what I need is a little life a little fire something that'll get me out of my seat something that'll make me smile something like dong g rampa 2 no that's not it I did not beat this game I got a few hours in and it was not it dog I remember liking the first one but I'm older now this isn't for me anymore but but but but but I do accept that this is just going to be extremely tough mama didn't raise no H me The Last of Us I've never played and damn it boy if this game doesn't jump up and remind me that this project is supposed to be fun I wholeheartedly do not expect to like this as much as I do especially considering all the expectations I have about it being this big Masterpiece but it actually is that good it's a man game I want to make a video about why this is such a personal experience for me but only 8 months left got to keep moving after abandoning dongar ratu I decide that this list should prioritize new genres and series as things I've not touched yet so at this point I take off BioShock 2 and replace it with Gravity Rush and Gravity Rush is an absolute it's fine it's good it's fun the movement really works when it works and doesn't when it doesn't the presentation is all there the story is all there and cat is cute as a button damn two games beat I'm on a roll Tetris effect yes sir everything I expected I'm playing Tetris but my soul is also at one with the universe and everyone in it this has my mind more blown than a one piece fan discovering that other anime exists now you're back Mr Pokey and you'll tell us what to do right you've got a plan or something like Mr Pokey right that's right baby daddy's here everything's going to be all right I wasn't prepared for Psychonauts never have I ever played it never seen it never knew what it was about anything but when I tell you that booing It Up made me crave goldfish a lightsaber Go-Gurt and a Zub book I mean it from the bottom of my heart this game somehow makes me feel like a kid without relying on any Nostalgia I am having a blasty blast playing this until that last area don't talk about that anyways four in a row the streak lives I booted up remnants of Nasi it kicks my ass I give up rip streak then on one spontaneous evening with the lads in the Discord call I decide to add a game called the complex found footage all the limal space talk this year has me feeling some kind of way and it only takes about an hour to beat this [Music] but it is a very dense hour I'm also a coward but March I realize is the first time I've actually gotten through seven games so with a little bit of luck I could get right back in this thing I have a few days left so I boot up Persona 4 Golden which whoa whoa whoa hang on what oh man this was this was this was so much fun but why why is it so hot all of a sudden no no no no no no no no Persona 4 Golden consumes all all of April and all of May per my very brief notes the entire month of April consists of three things going on a week long vacation being behind on a video and playing Persona 4 Golden oh I think I also sold a backlog shirt that like no one bought may it appears I did in fact start tears of the Kingdom with everyone else I even played some shorter games uh one shot which yes I I I I do seem to have some footage for and uh citizen sleeper oh yeah yeah citiz and sleeper that was like really good it was like astonishingly good I can't believe I liked a tabletop RPG style story maybe there's hope for disco elesium gave this a few hours it felt like 2D bloodborne to me that's worth another look one day tears of the Kingdom yeah I mean that's been magnificent but Persona 4 Golden man what did you do to me where did the time go a dark swirling storm cell of dread begins to roll as I swallow the fact that it's taken me 2 months to put away 3 and 1 half games but I have a realization In This Moment a gust of clarity Parts the clouds of my anxiety and I realized that time flew because I had fun playing Persona 4 because I didn't rush through it it pacified me it allowed me to focus some of my best work on the channel this year comes out during this window and I realize that this entire backlog project is a joke you can't play all these games in this sort of a window and expect to actually enjoy them you can't rush it and still have fun you can't yes you can the problem is RPGs they're far too long I can't afford another Persona 4 Golden plus it's well established that I like RPGs there's nothing to discover here so the following RPGs I decide would be saved for after the backlog I like this idea of Baby Moses in away titles that I know I won't want to rush this is the play and it makes up for all the time I lost I'm back in the game right on schedule I roll credits on tears of the Kingdom what can I say that hasn't already been said tears of the Daryl I decide to scrap these three games off the list simply because I want to I'm tired of figing interest in them just because other people have sung their praises I play Happy game it is not a happy game I play abzu it is beautiful colorful vibrant inspiring and it makes me have to pee I have abandoned cultist simulator after losing patience with it I read online that the entire point is to be lost at first then figure things out as you go once again my patience is Oreo thin thin and I'm no longer ashamed of it milk outside a bag of milk outside a bag of milk feels like it's brilliant if you notice all of the little subtleties of a narrative but there is no time for that I finish it and move on before my thoughts have a chance to really unpack what I've just played it bothers me that this doesn't bother me but I find solace in the fact that after shelving a few titles saving others for later and beating some 19 games have been crossed off in the last 3 months not far off the 78 game per month Pace I've stopped the bleeding from Persona yukio's laughter echoes in my mind she does a lot of that in that game I smile this might work out after all I've been showing you a lot of stats throughout this video and I hope that's been nice but there's a stat that I notice at the start of July a stat that I have have not been tracking and this figure makes me all at once realize how much I have truly shat the bed Street Fighter 6 was not on the original backlog I add it upon discovering this because I simply cannot have spent this kind of time on a game and not see it as a green line in this spreadsheet I absolutely adore Street Fighter I realize I'm desper to play it every hour I am in the desert and it is water it is everything I loved about Guilty Gear except I firmly understand all the mechanics and I'm actually playing as an upper tier character now I have a reliable anti-air I have reliable Plus on block options I have abs of steel but I know that I'm already behind on the backlog so behind that I had to literally make the list shorter because it was too hard and yet here I am shamelessly wasting hours upon hours I desperately need by bitching about mod controls and trying to get comfortable with the JP matchup and I don't want to make it seem like this was all in July the game came out in June and it continues to plague me well into September but looking at this figure makes me realize that I have slowly been surrendering I have accepted my fate this list isn't getting done and furthermore I don't think I really care the video can be about how impossible this task really is it can be a big joke look how miserably I failed you can't optimize your life around experiences you truly just need to be spontaneous and enjoy yourself and maybe there's truth to that maybe I do feel that way all I know at this point really is that I'm tired the second half of July arrives despite my growing apathy I still go through the motions I play Shadow of the Colossus I get to about the 13th one between the soundtrack and the grand scale of the fights it's abundantly clear why this is so special to so many people but parts are slow and Grading this Colossus seems to have me in some kind of unending Loop where I get back control of my character just as it hits me again I get up and am immediately hit this continues Beyond My Control until the Game responds me earlier in the fight asking me to repeat the long tedious cat and mouse game to get back to this point I refuse and instead watch the remain Remer of the game on YouTube abandoned I remove the following games from the list as I seem to have lost interest in them or I simply feel like I don't have time for them it's tough to say hey welcome back you can kind of see me struggling with when to remove games from the list but I think that stems from the fact that keeping a list doesn't allow you to forget about games if you're disciplined you write everything down you might be interested in and that's both a blessing and a curse if you can't say no to adding things if you aren't careful it will inflate your backlog very quickly and overwhelm you this is one of the things I got sandbagged by in this year a patreon comment I got not long ago shared in the sentiment if you don't write a game down and then completely forget about it well there's a chance it wasn't important enough to remember anyways something I wish I had thought about at the start of all this back to July I find time to play and abandon deer Esther I get lost and drown I can't even complete a walking Sim as the last week of the month approaches I decid it's time for something I've been missing out on since [Music] 2007 Mass Effect is the next game that reminds me that this is supposed to be fun because it is fun the combat has moments of Jank but you put that aside and you can barely tell it's a 16-year-old game the amount of times I say hell yeah during my time with this game is embarrassing but can't help but deeply care for all of my crew it's so cheesy sometimes and yet a smile continually stretches across my face over and over during my time with it July ends up being at least a little productive but I can't help but kick myself for letting Street Fighter illustrate how much time I can find and then just waste then my thoughts betray me I I don't think it was a waste though I I think I think I loved every second of grinding Street Fighter even if it did derail some stupid backlog project I settle into a reluctant rhythm in August I still make a little time for Street Fighter almost every day but I only beat one game signal I play a few others though for several hours each rain world is stressful in waves but is contrasted nicely with periods of warmth and safety The Long Dark doesn't really hook me but I'm happy to have tried it what the golf is a hoot I decide to save it for the next time I go visit my golfing buddy back home crosscode manages to snatch 13 hours of my time as I wander its brilliantly designed Dungeons and listen to its sneaky good story before I realize it's far too special for me to rush I decide to save it for later when I can really enjoy it the same can be said of bloodborne even if I hate that I have to grind for blood vials to heal instead of just having a good Old Reliable Estus flask and of course signalised me that I actually love survival horror I always have since dead space back in the day I just haven't played enough of the genre that'll change soon overall I look back on August finally even if I didn't beat everything I touched a lot and it feels like enough if there's anything I'm grateful for in this backlog process is that once upon a time it deeply bothered me that I hadn't played quintessential games I hated knowing that other essayists were playing something interesting and I wasn't going to be the first to talk about it I hated being left out of a conversation because oh I've never played Halo I've never played middle Gear Solid this backlog project cured me of that when September arrives I could not care less what other people have or have not played I do not care what I am supposed to have played as a YouTuber I do not care what anyone thinks about about how I spend my [Music] time suddenly this all becomes very funny because I could just put my head down and start playing games but instead I start September by reading a book I started a book like like what I knew nothing about this book we were in Barnes & Noble and my wife said I heard this is pretty good and I was like my time has come what I used to procrastinate reading books with video games now I'm procrastinating video games with a book I sto myself about three chapters in something deep inside me reaches up and grabs me Daryl you can't do this for sake man how deep of a hole are we going to dig here I closed the book you're right darl there's still hope maybe if I just knock out some shorter games I can build some momentum to hell with this book uh get away from me disgusting I'm above you so anyways I read the entire book it's really good and then I decided to go play some short Indies played hyperbola it was trippy but I'll keep it a buck it made me motion sick so I abandon it played Super Lial instead beat it it was oddly inspiring at the end wasn't expecting that played some manifold Garden it was unbelievably trippy I wanted to experience that infinite architecture firsthand and I did until I eventually got burned out on puzzles and abandon it next was cyanara wild heart and it was the best way I can describe it is several contained but intense religious experiences many emotional breakdowns every part was my favorite part it was gorgeous it was moving it was dramatic it was I actually just watched this one on YouTube I've got to be honest with you I stand by what I said but when I was considering starting it I decided to look up some gameplay and before I knew it an hour had passed and I'd watched the whole thing it's a damn good game please go play it actually despite how hopeless things felt at this point and how little I actually cared what happened I did realize as October Drew near that I only really had October left most of November would be spent writing this video so I only had just over a month left to actually play stuff my heart flutters at the prospect of being done even if I fell short it would be over and then I could go play some of those beautiful RPGs I set aside which makes me think how ass backwards is it that I'm excited to be done playing games so that I can go play games somehow I've turned something I love into a chore last year I talked about eteka zinder Blade 2 and how completely blown away he looked watching those credits all to illustrate how none of us want to miss an experience like that the point of the backlog for all of us is obviously to find these games the ones that when you watch the CRS role leave you speechless short of perhaps just a simple man but something I neglected to mention was that he spent like over 500 hours playing it the point being it takes time to cultivate love for a game or a story or anything in life and that's something it's extremely tough to do when you're constantly looking ahead to the next thing all summer I find myself in a Perpetual angry fog I am irritated at the smallest things for months small daily responsibilities infuriate me I feel like I can't rest or really enjoy spending more than a few hours on anything time is ticking there is always something next I have to do be it a video or an errand or a game or an email and I can't shake it it's like sleepwalking with TXS in my shoes so I take a break and I confide in my wife about this she then says something very wise you can't be present when you're always looking forward you just need to live in the moment it hits me that this is what made Street Fighter such a release for me there is nothing to cross off about it it's fun for the sake of being fun and I want to play it and don't get me wrong there's still quite a bit on the list at this point I want to play but the time limit melted away all of the Wonder and thrill of them down into boxes to be checked lines in an Excel sheet it's at this point Clarity floods my eyes for the first time all year and I see what needs to happen I have a plan it's go time the first thing I need to do is be realistic this is how much time I have to play with only about 5 weeks left so unfortunately I make the decision to remove these games from the backlog on the basis of lack of Interest next I save these for later since I'm either familiar with them or their sequels this is the last round of removal everything remaining is getting played I make a bold decision I boot up a 30-hour game because once again it's time for something to remind me why I'm doing this and 13 Sentinels ages Rim is exactly that this is one of those games that is truly unlike anything I've ever played nothing else really tells the story the way this game does there are 13 main characters this should be overwhelming but I embrace this wildly intertwining story and find my myself blissfully Tangled in its web its graph sort of looks like this this character is my favorite I decide no no no no this is my favorite character hang on out wait wait this is my favorite character no this is my favorite it's one of those games even the combat is a not to know is actually my favorite though even the combat is a delight I hear Whispers that it's the best story in gaming which you know like like how do you define that but it's certainly one that I think will stand the test of time and is told unlike anything else I've ever seen man this takes almost 2 weeks but I'm not discouraged anymore on a whim I even throw a short new game on the list you're on a path in the woods and at the end of that path is a cabin and in the basement of that cabin is a princess you're here to slay her if you don't it will be the end of the world slay the princess or as I like to call it I can fix her simulator is yet another game that I think I would have enjoyed much more if I wasn't on the clock it's a little decisions matter visual novel that I probably should have saved for after this but it's clear that there was a lot under the hood here happy to have played it I move on then I accidentally start playing sea of stars because I find myself having to wait on something which I don't have time to do so here I am enjoying a game I pretty much knew I was going to enjoy dream like pixel art a story that promises to wow combat that Likens to the old alpad dream Mario and Luigi RPGs everything about this game is clicking for me right down to the oh here we go this is what I had to wait on I save sea of stars for later it's time to lose my Resident Evil virginity time to see what the buzz is all about and hot damn this is one fat bumblebee I had the wrong impression of resi I thought it was this Uber serious hardcore horror series and it it kind of is but it's also so silly and video gamey sometimes it's corny and it knows it music characters level design puzzles location the castle especially blows me away over the 3 days I played this game it rains on every one of them after not raining for weeks and as someone who adores rainstorms this weekend felt like a perfect Little Slice of Heaven man this is why I do this this is what the backlog is [Music] for next is Devil May Cry 5 now I've never played a DMC game I don't fully understand what is happening in this plot but it's so cool I do roll credits on this but I can tell I've only scratched the surface of really playing a DMC game I was winning and progressing but it felt like I was letting the game down by not playing perfectly I think at some point I'll go back and do just that then I put about 2 hours into disco elesium immediately I can see that the writing here is tremendous off the charts even the premise of waking up being a forag or detective and colums investigating a death is fantastic but I look at all of the DND elements and quickly become overwhelmed I abandon it for now maybe I'll come back to it down the line and [Music] then what the hell is this game Lisa the painful initially I get lost and abandoned after playing on the switch handheld one morning but a few weeks later to get some footage I start the game over and things start to click maybe I should give this another look I save it for later devotion is next since Halloween is approaching and devotion is would you believe me if I told you this game is actually kind of beautiful at the end and on Halloween night I finish Silent Hill 2 um the best way I can describe this game is that I hate every second of my time with it and yet I can't stop thinking about it most horror games tease you and poke you you scream and giggle you're playing them because you want to be scared and they want to scare you but when I walk through the foggy streets and miling hallways of Silent Hill I I don't want to be here the sound design the dissonant music the unforgiving camera the clumsy controls the subtle reflections of james' subconscious all just make this the most unfun game I could possibly be playing and yet again it stays with me guess it's time to add to the mountain of Silent Hill 2 videos out there then something hits me I'm making healthy progress at seven games down some being pretty sizable ones I'm on a pace that had I sustained for the entire year I might have been able to actually do this the way I intended and furthermore I'm having more fun than I've had all year it's suddenly easy to put away games now that the pressure is off in case it wasn't already blindingly clear here this is even more evidence that the time limit is the issue but I'm also left with the discovery that this year has fostered a great Habit in me I'm wanting to play more games I'm deciding what to play next quicker I'm playing more efficiently and I'm not afraid to try any genre the backlog was a giant swirling Vortex of panic that followed me all year but if you take away the time limit the winds subside and I discover that those winds are carrying every variety of sweet delectable experience imaginable chocolate tornado this method works when you remove the deadline and even if I didn't finish on the terms I would have liked I'm still left with the habits it developed the sun goes down and it rises on November there is only one game left November is the month I actually actually have to write the script so I only have a little bit of time to work with now before I boot up this final 8 Hour game I go back and check my list of removed games is there anything here I feel like I can squeeze in to help my numbers is there anything I regret taking off and at this point I I notice just how many there are I stare at this lethal gash that has been taken out of the original list that I spent so much time crafting one year ago my inner dialogues begin to argue part of me feels like I let you all down this voice thinks that I failed the hundreds of thousands of people that watched that video last year I'm nowhere close to what I intended I didn't even try almost half the list and another voice calmly says yes but let's be honest you don't want to try any of these you just want to be able to say that you did I listen to both voices and I begin the final game on the backlog a game that I had no clue how much I needed to play play in that game is hellblade senu a sacrifice a game unlike anything I have ever played here's what climbing a ladder in hellblade is like climb she has down down down down this is the only thing I've ever played where there are no other real characters to interact with and yet I never ever feel alone go in you have to go in it's too dark take it this will help you you have to be able to see the team at Ninja Theory worked with real therapists and psychologists to build as accurate a portrayal of psychosis as they possibly could psychosis is a collection of symptoms I've never experienced but allegedly what we see cinova go through is pretty damn on point this game does a spectacular job of illustrating inner conflict in one of the most visually and auditorally bombastic ways imaginable I'm going to tell you how the final stretch of the game works this is technically a spoiler but the game has been out for 6 years now and I'm not going to tell you what it means for sena's story but I am going to tell you what it means for mine Sena walks through a gate the camera pans and we see an uncomfortably colossal being she charges for it screaming dripping with blood and rage the being shrieks and she is blown back only to find herself confronted with a horde of Illusions she fights them off the process repeats she falls and coughs up blood another horde she fights on this time the enemies are tougher I fight harder again she charges again more enemies I move she moves I swing she swings I block she parries this backlog is is getting finished and she is getting the ending she deserves But as time goes on I realize a few things this fight isn't ending the foes keep coming and despite how many times I fail she still gets up even though I've definitely hit a game over plenty of times in previous stages more Illusions more than ever before there are too many of them and I can't realistically keep up I begin to get angry how on Earth could the devs expect anyone to last this this long much less think this is fun there are too damn many again and again she falls again and again more enemies spawn I grit my teeth and I swear there is no end to this let me fight the final boss already but the voices begin to chime in you're going to die and I ignore them I'm going to win CA Falls let go CA I don't let go stop I don't stop let go s I won't I have to beat this it's my last game I have to do this I want to be done I want to I am then presented with an ending that 2 seconds into I reject I immediately pause the game because I'm sure that I failed and that this is the bad ending I take to the internet and discover that you you cannot actually win hellblade you can only lose that final fight it's impossible intentionally this is the only ending upon reading this I don't really know what to feel poetically I couldn't beat the final game on my backlog list but maybe that's the point I think the reason that final fight cut me so deeply is because it perfectly Illustrated did exactly how this whole year-long Endeavor felt no matter what I did no matter how many games I played another one was always there another one will always be there it's an impossible task C's tale is one of accepting and letting go and that's what I had to do this year has taught me that the only way to beat the backlog is to accept that you can't beat it because as soon as it becomes a destination you completely disregard the journey and the journey is what we do this for what we do anything for why we live did finishing my backlog make me happy no it it didn't but trying to do so experiencing all of the little things is made of every Adventure every romance every friendship every Parry every checkpoint every dungeon every chapter every step absolutely did so should you try this should you organize your backlog and finish it absolutely just maybe maybe don't put a time limit on it because that is unquestionably my biggest regret I think the tracking list actually works wonders like I said the habits are in me now I've started my next backlog a much smaller more manageable list of about 20 that I'm thrilled to dive into and I'm not afraid to try any genre now I may not have succeeded but I'm happy with who I became in the process and I've had so many people message me over the year to share their experiences people have sent their spreadsheets and told me how much they've beaten how much they've prioritized and actually finished games they've been meaning to play for the longest this clearly works for a great many people so if you're interested in trying this go for it if you've already started let me know how it is going down down down below down down below the biggest difference from who I was last year to now is that now I'm at peace with all of the things I'll never get to play all of the things in life I'll never get to experience because the pursuit of everything paradoxically costs you everything stressing over the backlog distracts from enjoying it and I refuse to waste my life searching when I should spend it savoring I wanted to spend way too much time playing Street Fighter put 500 hours into a jrpg Play resi 4 again on a higher difficulty and then go right about it and in between I look forward to knocking down the NeverEnding backlog at a healthy Pace I'm grateful that I tried this I hope you try it too just you know don't give yourself a deadline play what calls your name don't be afraid to drop it if you weren't feeling it take your time right about what you play and don't ever worry about what's next when you're living in the moment with a little bit of luck and with a lot of determination there's no doubt you'll find yourself staring at the credits rolling with a smile on your face speechless save for one word [Music] [Music] man hey you thanks for watching what is probably the longest video I'll ever make turns out recounting an entire year of events takes a while thank you so so very much for making this possible the support I've had around this all year has been unreal you are all amazing if you like what you see here and want to support the show for a dollar a month over on patreon you can get bonus content like live streams creative input bloopers weekly updates and your name and the credits like you see here link down below oh and I'm selling this shirt Again by the way that link is also down there somewhere shout out to this month's featured patrons Airman 121 fly Jimmy Stewart Michael locket Pascal case Eustace more cowbell and Neo thanks again for watching like share subscribe let me know how your backlog is going in the comments and please genuinely have your yourself a damn good one I'm just kidding but could you imagine

Channel: Daryl Talks Games

Views: 833,357

Keywords: Daryl Talks Games, Psych of Play, Game Design, video game psychology, Video Essay, Psychology, Psychology of Gaming, DTG backlog, backlog, finishing the backlog, daryl talks games backlog, backlog daryl talks games, backlog daryl, daryl backlog, backlog part 2, gaming backlog, how to beat gaming backlog, DTG backlog part 2, daryl backlog part 2, gaming backlog part 2, part 2, psych of play backlog, backlog psychology, backlog psych of play

Id: BuszSUI_qBY

Length: 56min 43sec (3403 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 25 2023