"His Mom Said I Dressed Like A Sloot..." (r/AskReddit)

I'll slash ask reddit since we don't hear much about it ladies have read it what was your worst meet the mom story my mother-in-law found us but is naked about to have ex and lectured me for an hour about how Jesus says no and then the next time she met me she gave me STD pamphlets because I should get checked out as I'm obviously a loose woman super great first meeting and even better second meeting been with my husband over 10 years and I'm still the H that corrupted her precious son and why he left her to move in with me when we decided to start a life together Jesus says no this is the part where you point out to her that neither one of you is Jesus and either one of us said no instead we both said yes over and over and over again dating a guy for a few months go meet his mom and she launches into the history of her abusive ex-husband and how / why / when he died kept going on and on about how she felt like a terrible parent because the guy wasn't successful and on and on and on and I don't really know what to say so I'm just like oh and while and/or because she isn't even letting me get a word in then I started noticing it in the guy I was dating and bailed as soon as possible sounds exactly like a woman I know named Donna talks daily about the abuse of dead husband endlessly in detail I know a Danner and this makes me sad my ex's mom was a narcissist who seemed to be in love with her son not in the Kutaisi oh gosh I'm just so in love with my little guy normal mom way like she clung on to him guilt tripping him into never abandoning her and ugh she flirted with him she prance around in her underwear in front of us a few times doing this a whoops teehee act that squiffed me the hell out but that's another story I had a very brief first encounter with her he was still living at home because she'd throw a fit whenever he'd suggest he move out she would end up alternating between insisting that she come along wherever he went she was married bTW guilt-tripping him by insisting he was a horrible ungrateful son for even thinking of abandoning her anyway he rushed me into his house and practically pushed me into his bedroom man as he's closing the door I see these fingers jammed themselves between the door and the doorframe preventing him from closing it I then proceeded to watch him shove his shoulder up against the door with all his weight as his mom desperately tries to claw her way into the room trying to poke her head in staring at me with this world intensity and yelling is this her I wanna meet her , open the door I wanna meet her as he yells back yes it's her ga away mom mom ga away stop no like godom lady no I do not want to meet my new boyfriend's mother this way this is not a great first impression I'm scared he finally manages to unwrap her fingers from around the door and shoves it closed I hear her padding around outside in the hallway for a minute or two and then she hops and retreats to the dead I was then supposed to have ex with him what a mood killer my first real interaction with her was incredibly dramatic but a bit less intense I feel like I've written too much as is so if any board is curious I'll tell that one my first time actually meeting her didn't involve any introductions or small talk this was around 2010 my boyfriend had just discovered American Apparel and loved their colorful men's briefs so he bought a few pairs he was goofing off in his pink unders with a pair of sunglasses made me take a picture and he posted it as his new profile picture on facebook an hour later we are at his house watching television when his mom gets back from work slams the door stomps through through the kitchen huffing and puffing slamming cupboards stomps through the den right past us as she mutters to herself wrenches opened the garage door and slams it behind her as I hear hit banging around in there I shoot my boyfriend and nervous look w what's happening should I leave and he's bizarrely laid-back about it he just shrugs and tells me to ignore her I mean I'll try I thought I'd be saying hello and properly introducing myself to her today but everything's tense and moody she keeps coming and going stopping slamming muttering pointedly ignoring us while clearly making an effort to have us notice her until my boyfriend finally calls out mom what's wrong she bursts into the den from the kitchen and starts yelling how can you do this how to me lady what he asks for specifics and she shouts this frankly weird and unbelievable story about her co-workers showing her his updated fatter book profile picture why would her andum co-worker be trolling his page why not admit you were on his profile but whenever he asks her why it bothers her so much she just sort of sputters and scours the entire time I'm ignored and I'm glad I've curled up into a little ball on the couch I don't want to be the focus of her rage right now and I just wearily watched this exchange from my little space spot boyfriend finally Hoff's and tells her to get over it and she wrench his open the garage door glares at me yells why would you throw it in my face slams the door and disappears ducking awkward but he doesn't even want to address the hitch ow there just went down it's apparently nothing all in all it seems like his mother was upset by the facts and girl was taking pictures of her little boy in his undies that she believed we were cruelly robbing our relationship in her face via Facebook and that it was all designed as an attempt to break her heart she never actually said hello never introduced herself to me we just had to pretend that everything was fine and act normal the next time we saw her she was god-awful to me once she finally started speaking to me just or for the entire two years I dated her son we briefly got back together a year after we broke up after he dated another girl for a while who she'd jokingly threatened to stop and my first time seeing her again went hi coma it's been a while she just stares at me dead ID from across the living room in painfully awkward silence for the slowest 510 seconds of my life turns to her son and quietly asks can I talk to you in the den X but not ex boyfriend and her argue in muffled tones for a while boyfriend storms out of the den as ioq wordly fiddled by the entryway shouts over his shoulder duck I'll find them grabs me shoves me towards his room and lets me know his mother had told him that of all the girls you dated she's the worst anybody but her I told you how much I hate her why is she back thanks lady a lovely warm welcome every time Wow just duck what a psychopath I have one from the guy who met my mom mom decided that I was taking too long to introduce him to her so without my knowledge she went to his place of business Rito went up to the most handsome white guy there and said you must be Jay he pointed to my boyfriend in the back of the store she walked up to the only other white guy in the store and assumed he was Jay once it was clear that Jay the only guy left was brown she proceeded to explain that we used to live next to some Mexicans and they weren't very nice to their women he said that he wasn't Mexican she insisted there would still be cultural similarities Jay isn't his real name holy hit I know I thought Jay was his real name I had a long term even boyfriend we moved to Florida together and I met his mother she didn't speak English which was understandable they were from El Salvador but then my boyfriend's father slapped her in the face while she cooked dinner during some kind of spat totally stopped the conversation and was like WTF I was told to ignore it and that it was normal I was 17 at the time so I was pretty clueless the relationship didn't work out because less than three months later he started beating on me normal if anyone is reading this and going hey that sounds Lee TBF I was 17 and I was on the other side of the country from everyone I knew at the mercy of this guy and his family had I made a stink I'd had nowhere to go and that coupled with being young and dumb meant I decided to go along with it instead of calling up my mommy and begging for a plane ticket home my first real relationship in high school dated a polish junior his parents moved to the u.s. from Poland when he was little and his mum was insanely protective of her first son met her after a few months and we were taking a weekend trip to the beach with my family so my parents wanted to meet his etc pulled up to the house and his dad was so nice to my family and me and the mom came out screaming in Polish she ranted and raved through a box of mold Boris at my mom's face we all got in the car and went to the shore and my boyfriend was pissed but didn't seem like he was too surprised we dated for a little over a year during that time his father was so nice to us but the mom broke into his studio apartment stole food we were going to make for dinner and tossed all the cutlery and plates in the hall his sister also punched him repeatedly when he asked why she did that I found out the mom died a few years ago and honestly was kind of happy she was ducking miserable and the dad didn't deserve to finish out his life with such a maniac to clarify the mom wasn't mentally ill she was incredibly respectful and sweet to her sisters random hookups she was protective of her son and the sister just behaved like her also hid her boyfriends also he has a studio apartment down the block in a house his dad owned the dad moved him out because of how abusive his mom was to him the mom came out screaming in Polish she ranted and raved through a box of mold Boris at my mom's face I mean do you speak Polish maybe she was just giving you some cigarettes oh my god thank goodness you're here smoke these my boyfriend's mom doesn't speak English and we were going to stay with her for a week before Christmas on the way to the airport he told me that his mom actually doesn't know we are coming because he wants to surprise her how sweet except for real your mom should know estranged girl is coming to stay with her I was so pissed when we get a herd or he rings the doorbell and jumps and hides behind the bushes before I realized what he had done she opened the door and I'm just standing there alone I probably looked like a Jehovah's Witness coming to talk to her about our Lord Jesus Christ talk about awkward edit my boyfriend and I are still together and his mom will hopefully soon become my mother-in-law I love his mom so much we still can't communicate and she has dementia now and one day she will forget Who I am but hopefully this unique meeting keeps me in her mind a little longer was he 12 I hear stories like this and I'm actually amazed that a full blown adult thinks this is an acceptable way to act I knew my ex had a religious family but didn't realize how religious until I met them they were Pentecostal and prayed in tongues and channeled God they were really really into it on my first day of meeting the parents his mother took me to her friend's house where her prayer group chanted over me after putting oil all over my body I wasn't raised around such strangeness so I felt very awkward and I had to bite my lip to keep myself from breaking out into laughter mom was cool with me for a while until God told her I had practiced witchcraft and practiced the dark arts once she had that in her head the relationship was doomed we eventually broke up her son was superhot but he thought fossils were the devil's trickery he probably still thinks he dodged a witch damn man where are you from I'm from central Canada and I always sort of assumed those sorts of people were half made up wild story seems you may have dodged a bullet there they aren't my mom used to scam religious folks for a living when I was younger and even here in Canada those folks are everywhere not a lady but when I introduced my sow to my mom my mom basically asked for an introduction Hal I met her et Cie then told me why don't you go outside and help you father finish building the shed sweetie my sir gave this worried look back at me boughs pass I can hear through the open window of the house that the two of them are just laughing their asses off when I get back into the house they're laughing about something and I asked about what was so funny oh nothing sweetie just getting to know your girlfriend they've made a bunch of cookies at this point absolutely delicious I asked my sir what they talked about and all I got out of hell was I'll tell you later little did I know my mom went into the Attic fetched a photo album of my entire life basically a photo album that has pictures of me running outside stark naked pictures of me digging for gold in my nose pictures of my awkward teams and heavy metal phase since then I have never heard the end of it from my so well-played mom well played duck you mom surprisingly wholesome was not expecting this I can tell you when I met my husband's parents I didn't know that the mom cooks with zero spices as in absolute zero not even salt and pepper so at our first meeting a dinner at the parents house the food was so bland no sauces gravies spices or flavoring of any kind whatsoever they're only condiment was ketchup which I detest the other family I members drowned their food in it except mom there was no reason for it she just thought good food doesn't need seasoning I struggled through the meal of a plain hamburger patty with plain mashed potatoes and some sort of vegetable mush the following week at Sunday dinner I brought a small container of salt and pepper when I discreetly tried to salt and pepper the plain baked potato dead silence at the table and all eyes on me I froze the mother-in-law-to-be sniffed a tear bag and left the table quickly dead silence while I waited for the floor to swallow me up the husband-to-be reached over and picked up the tiny salt-and-pepper container and used it passed it to his brother who used it and on around the table conversation resumed in the mom quietly returned to the day for refusing to eat later she was telling her son my husband-to-be that I obviously thought she was a dreadful cook since good food did not require salt and pepper to his ever-loving credit he said mom you cook with love but even good food needs a little seasoning there was a reason I love this man it took a lot to stand up to his mom a very strong-minded woman they never invited us to dinner again all the years we were married because I dared to put salt and pepper on food outside of this issue we had a reasonable relationship not the greatest but far from the worst one might say she was salty underrated post thanks for adding some flavor to the original post and for peppering us with your witty banter ducking like and subscribe [Music]

Channel: Reddit & Chill

Views: 134,001

Keywords: meet the mom, meeting the parents, bad experiences meeting the parents, Mom hit on me, what was your meet the mom story, askreddit moms, askreddit cheating, askreddit scary, reddit top posts, askreddit funny, askreddit comedy, askreddit stupid, askreddit, top posts, r/, r/askreddit, best of reddit, top posts of all time, toad films, tz reddit, updoot reddit, reddit watchers, reddit and chill

Id: sDlJdD08ZcE

Length: 16min 25sec (985 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 05 2019