I go down to the Pharmacy one day I have to buy pain
medication for my mother so I get there with the script,
the woman's behind the counter She's like, "Hi Sir,
can I help you with anything?" I said yes, I need to fill
this prescription please she goes, "Okay, let me just check
here, that's for Mrs Noah?" I said yes, yes. "Okay, hold on. Oh, I am sorry Sir.
We don’t have any stock there." I said what do you mean no stock? She said, "Yeah,
we got nothing of that medicine" I said well,
when are you getting more? "Oh, we are not gonna
get for a few months hey there's a back-order problem" Okay, so what do you.
My mom needs the pain medication. She's like, "Yeah, I'm sorry." Oh, well. "Just joking! you should have seen your face, hey I've also got jokes there
Trevor, I've also got jokes." I'm like, you got jokes? my mom's in pain, she got shot you got jokes? this is not the time for jokes,
what the hell. It's not funny lady! It's too soon, it's just too soon! it's too soon. Ah, Hospitals. I’m not a fan. I had to go back for my
surgery, voice surgery. One of the most stressful
days of my life. I am there 5 o’clock in the morning,
I’m sitting in the waiting area. There’s this woman that checks
you in for you surgery. She’s not friendly at all, she’s not
even trying to make people feel good. She’s like, “next!” And you will come up, “next!” It’s my turn and she’s like,
“Name!” Trevor “Trevor” “Surname!” I said: “Noah” “Noah” “Noah?” “Trevor Noah?” I said: “yes” “Trevor Noah?” I said: “yes” “The comedian?” “The one who’s making the jokes, he?” “Yes” “The jokes about us when
we are on strike, he?” “No, not that one. This one.” “It’s another one, it’s not me.” She’s like, “Yea!” “Yea, you are here now, he?” “Hmm, it’s not funny now, hey?” “No, it’s not funny.” She’s like, “Yea, where’s your jokes now?” “They’re in the car” “What?”
“No, nothing. Nothing.” “Hmm, funny guy. So what you
doing here? You going to surgery?” I said: “yes” “Why you talking like
that, what’s wrong?” “I have got a thing.” “Oh, the voice is broken, he?” “Did you break something,
what’s wrong is it sore?” I said: “yes” “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s sore?” I said: “yes” “You want the medicine?” I said: “yes” “okay, let me just check.” “Oh, they say laughter
is the best medicine.” “Yea, so why don’t you just make a joke and fix it?” “Just make a joke on
the inside funny guy.” “Even me, I can do it for you.” I can make a joke, I can fix that Knock, knock. Who’s there?” “Nobody, yeah!” “Funny, funny.” “Funny, Next!” It's not funny it's my life oh, welcome guys. Welcome. just in time just started the show did he just ask you what did I
miss, what did I miss? why are you guys so
late, what happened? Eish! Eish, see patience, patience "Eish, late, Eish" go away, go away Luckily the voice surgery was a success you know, I had a great doctor I was blessed enough
to be able to heal and I can do the shows again most important thing
though, is the tea and as weird as it
sounds, I have to drink it it's a mixture of Rooibos lemon, honey, ginger,
sea salt and bicarb disgusting, but it works but it's great,
I can do my shows in South Africa I can do my shows in Southern Africa which is fantastic, so I'm doing that going out into Africa,
have you ever been into Africa Sir? No, what's your name if
you don’t mind me asking? Gerhard, Gerhard. Never been out into Africa No, the reason I said out into Africa is because this is not Africa No, South Africa is not.
This is Africa Lite guys. this is don’t get it twisted, when I say Africa I mean Africa, like Africa, Africa.
No jokes. No white people, nothing
nothing. it's just you in the streets
Gerhard, just you just you, if you see like
one other white person you're happy, yay! it's your reflection. I've started doing shows
out there Gerhard, you know Places like Namibia, fantastic Botswana as well, beautiful Wanted to go to Zimbabwe,
but I skipped it No, because I don't want to die.
That's the only reason. You laugh but I mean
this, you cant make jokes about Robert Mugabe in Zimbabwe if you do this, you get arrested and get sent to prison for
mocking the president, right. so I know I would go there,
and I wouldn’t be able to resist I would be like,
"Hey, Mustache hey" and then, I'm in jail. which normally wouldn’t
be such a bad thing because what would happen normally in
an international incident like that is normally your president
would just come there he would ask you to be released
and taken back to your country but now, I don’t know if that guy will come and fetch me. I can see him sending
Mugabe the e-mail now "It's fine, Rob" "keep him" so I am not taking any chances.
