Full Details of my Retirement? | New Neck Injury, Leaving Leeds, Pandemic??

wow i am completely blown away overwhelmed it's an understatement about four hours since i've publicly announced my retirement to the internet to the world in this video i'm going to talk to you to the camera all the details you know my time the video my main channel was i just wanted to make something really sort of mini documentary style like powerful inspirational just an amazing overview of my career our thoughts and you know in this video i'm gonna dive deep dig into all the details that you know if you're interested and you wanna keep watching this video by the way this is my second channel the creation of this second channel is really sort of aligned with my retirement i think you know wilson the youtuber i'm the gymnast guy and i built that through gymnastics so this place i just want to be a creative express myself for being me for sort of the next chapter and obviously i'm still going to be creating epic content on the main channel but um yeah subscribe it's completely free you can change your mind any time so where do i start the turning point was the neck i last competed the the 2018 commodore engine at this competition i felt unstoppable literally like i could do it i felt like god that was the strongest version of nile wilson physically and meant mental i mean physique i had a little um injury in my hand i still made it and that was part of it as well i wasn't even doing all around going into that i managed to put together a palmer routine and winning ended up winning the all-around scoring 86 all around with a 12 on pommel's which is ridiculous so at that point i was like and my team and everyone around me and and probably you guys and everyone was like this kid's gonna do it he's gonna go all the way to tokyo's his time and i felt it i felt it mentally i was just it's sort of from that point incrementally things just started to just take a turn you know i i first hurt my neck a couple of months after the commonwealth games in training doing the front of rice double back on people as dimitrinko i felt like i think this was the first stage of my bulging disc it's not like you know this is like mid sort of june 2018 that's when i first had the incident with my neck couldn't train for a while horrendous pain like the the the pain with with the neck has been all neural so like the the disc has been on nerves which has just been horrific pain those that have experienced sort of neural back trauma and it's it's horrendous all pain is horrendous but this in particular because it doesn't necessarily go away when a disc is on a nerve it's hot on it so your brains like this hurts all the time i had an epidural injection a couple months later i sort of got back in the training i was really really really black my hand was better as well it was going in 2018 world championships was ready and the team knew at that point you know i was i was strong i was hoping it took me a while to get there but things have just started to pull together two days before we flew i snapped ligaments in my finger in a controller competition at the other side which was just like another one like another test another smack in the face another test i remember crying my eyes out all the way driving home from russia all and we still might they might have sent me maybe you know i didn't know whether i could still maybe do it i packed my bag in the hall in the flat and then we called the head coach and the doctor and stuff and especially if you don't go i mean at that point i think if you just see me in that competition that would have probably been the best gymnastics i've ever done and you know who knows you know currently the two russians are just sort of one and two in the world i believe that could challenge them i think that's that i'm going to tell you this whole story but that's probably the most heartbreaking thing for me one might not compete and never really getting this feeling that feeling again because it's here it's you can't replicate it it's ridiculous same as being a pop star an athlete i got to experience what that feels like in front of the crowd the accolade the event the big moment and do it you know perform after you've been training your whole life so i'll miss that but i think the heartbreaking thing for me is not fulfilling my potential maybe my potential was never you know i think i do think things happen for reasons and this is why we sat here and it was important that i didn't for other things coming up in the future but at that time following from the commonwealth game to that world championships i felt like i could be a world champion be an olympic champion all around you know i could beat those russian lantern you know everyone around me probably knew my potential and it was really exciting and it's just a shame that i will never really fulfill that anymore so listen february 2019 that's when the disc completely knackered herniated out ripped in half i had the disc replacement the the performance surgery my discs pulled out metal plates put in a cage you screwed to my spine then your spine sort of the fusion is all your bones like naturally grow together after the fusion that was like when my mental health took a turn like really huge tipping point those following months after that i'm not going to talk about this in video because you hopefully watch the documentary bad few months bad i got back it was about three and a half four months later jake timothy my surgeon at the time he was like look this is going to be at least six to 12 months fusion to happen we booked in a scan i think three and a half four months after surgery to see how it was getting on anyway i'm a medical marvel my spine achieved full fusion i was fully fixed so it was like structurally nile you can do whatever you want now that spine is solid which imagine what my brain would do at that point i'm still in pain like the nerve damage has memory and i was still in a lot of pain but i was like i can do alt here and not really causing much damage to my spine so i was like boom rush back the first trial for the world champs that you were not end of august so i'm gonna do it initially we're gonna do two or three pieces then we've got closer and closer i just started to progress and progress and more like you can imagine what i'm like i'm hungry and i don't want to go to the world's trial after having neck surgery and just show up like i want to win and that was part of my nature that's a trait of any of the best athletes in the world like we we compete to win so i didn't want to i wanted to rock up and i wanted to just prove it and part of my sort of real big value he's swimming against the tide i kind of love it when someone tells me i can't do something so i was like five six months after spinal surgery i'm gonna rock up to the first world trial and i'm gonna win all round like you imagine the upset but that was what was fueling me and keeping me going and basically in hindsight it was too much it was too quick the week of that first trial and then did my shoulder in now this injury was a complete game changer for me mentally damaged a lot my lung thoracic nerve which comes from the point if you do your research i believe from c6 c7 neck where i had fusion what it supplies is you serratus anterior muscles that stabilize your shoulder no idea what i did no idea literally just finished in one day that week i had like bad shoulder pain the next day when she walks in the gym told my coach and couldn't do a handstand kicked up just my arm collapsed and collapsed basically i assume it's just cut the supply of the muscle and even still today i'd take my top off and show you it doesn't work so you know this is this is a year and a half ago now but the worst one zero pain like literally i've not had a single speck of pain from it which i'm grateful for i think at the time i wanted more pain to sort of you know just to match my symptoms but grateful i wasn't in pain but it was even worse because my brain just didn't connect my shoulder didn't work like i'd gone from like having the most powerful strong shoulders and muscles on the planet so this shoulder did not work i could not do a handstand so you imagine put yourself there mentally i was just completely [ __ ] completely you know with nerve damage you can never even specialist that can never guarantee that anything the supply comes back your nerves rebuild the other side after operation when you you sky sometimes maybe in this next guy's still numb the nerve endings on your skin they may come back they may not it's one of those nerves it might do it might not so that even again that was mentally tough for me but we kept going we kept going at the start of 2020 before corbid i was like i'm doing it still i can do it like i can go to olympics win metal without for shoulder i can do it like that's just part of my like narcissistic like now i'm doing it like part of this journey i'm sort of talking you through the the the turn of events i left lee's gymnastics club the story isn't told on that and i think it's going to be my book coming out this year that was tragic it was tragic for everyone in myself like really really upsetting for me and i kind of i'm not allowed to go into detail unfortunately but that was a turn of event so i kind of had to move and move to manchester that was a big change and then kobe had hit so kobe hit no olympics so straight away i'm like thinking well this is brilliant because it's more time for my shoulder to recuperate the nerve to get the supply back and i had nilots and gymnastics in rotherham set up so before anyone else safely i could trade because i had my own gym everyone was training at home and trying to exercise outdoors thinking this is my chance to get ahead i pushed it and i trained out and i was in incredible shape like i might be able to pick up some some images i was just even i was fit i started to change my habits i felt good about myself i started loving seeing the sort of change and my shoulder was making progress you know things were starting to happen i got to about june july my next started again and then it got worse again anyway the standard protocol to scan me up again and i had another i have another bulging disc of the level above my surgery so it's usually what things happen when you have fusion that bitty spine don't move so it naturally puts pressure on above and below um so level above i think see five six i had a bulging disc similar symptoms that point for me well to today has been the transition into me retiring i think when i got that phone call i was like look it's not worth me potentially risking my livelihood i'm talking about a neck here another bulge another rip disc another surgery two levels the surgeon was like by no means you cannot now have another surgery i can't do it too like stop basically if you have another surgery that's complications when you're back for the rest of your life and then you know when we're talking about neck it's like do i want a risk for an olympic gold medal potentially being in a wheelchair and not being able to live my life and i've you know thrown my kids into the air and play golf and all of these things make the videos that i do there was a lot of period where i was talking about just doing one piece of apparatus just doing time went on i just i knew it was my time everyone that's kind of that they'd been i've got a lot of advice from ex-gymnasts my teammates that retired they just kind of said now you you'll know and i did and i felt it and you know what i from end of august to almost christmas i did nothing i did absolutely nothing um zero training and no movement and exercise and training and gymnastics is something i absolutely need in my life most of my mental health um it was quite nice just to be normal for four months and i drank wine every night i fell in love with emily it was incredible and he was tough so i'm making that decision i'm not saying mentally i was stable throughout throughout the whole process because i absolutely wasn't we kind of lined it up with commercial deals obviously signed with jim shack who were absolutely incredibly support incredible you know they were all that content and it's kind of the next chapter for me i'm so excited to be dedicating more time to my business and the content side of things because i've always been you know gymnastics has always been there like i'm an athlete first and i think it's pretty astonishing like what we've built when gymnastics and i didn't always get this right but gymnastics had to be my priority still around it all i made all of those videos you know i did everything that we did and i was training three or six hours a day on top of it so i certainly know how to bust my bollocks off and i think if i can apply the attention the the energy into the content the entertainment like revolutionizing the sport changing the game building a lot of gymnastics sort of gin business franchising that house i'm just really really excited for the next chapter and i feel ready today's been so emotional he's been so emotional and i cannot believe literally my support and love and comments and the people and the messages and it's just literally i i only feel like we're literally just getting started i feel like this is the starting point and probably the next couple of days i'll i'll feel these emotions because they're real and it's a big thing it is very real now announcing it i didn't think i feel like this along the way i just want to keep inspiring you guys i also want to build that team of like-minded people that are entrepreneurial that you know want to come on board i think we're doing lots of exciting stuff with business youtube side of things i mean the collaborations and things that have just been an epic in revolutionizing that sport and i think that's the next step for me i can travel the world i can go out to the hollywood gang i could go and meet all these people around the world because now i don't have a job my job in an athlete anymore it's it's guess i guess it's filming not like doing this or you know the business so it's cool feeling to be a free man i think we can really make waves in the platform with the sport because who doesn't want to do a backflip like genuinely who doesn't want to try one or learn it and it's so entertaining to watch people go through that process so listen i feel like i've said everything i want uh hopefully i haven't missed anything you know i've said all my thank yous in my other vlog like literally everyone around me you know who you are please subscribe to my second channel this is the wilson hitter join the wilson at a club the link is in the description we've got exciting things happening with that i'm gonna hit you with some epic content man

Channel: The Wilsonator

Views: 87,543

Rating: 4.9803295 out of 5

Keywords: Nile Wilson, Nile Wilson retirement, why Nile Wilson retired, full details of my retirement, Nile Wilson gymnastics, the end of Nile Wilson

Id: FYjdypywfLs

Length: 15min 8sec (908 seconds)

Published: Fri Jan 15 2021