Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin - Joey Bishop Guest Host | Carson Tonight Show

uh ladies and gentlemen I want to apologize I uh whoever does The Tonight Show uh Johnny especially when he's introducing someone who's written a book he holds up the book unfortunately for me the book was not here the book is favor the runner by j.u Richard Kennedy and now uh if you recall the last time I uh I did the show I had on as one of my guests Frank Sinatra and I have to tell you what this show did for him well you have my word the next day wherever he went people recognize them and I was going to introduce [Music] [Music] well I'm going to sit down here just sit down for a minute don't look for me to give another break like I did the last time just sit and relax so far this show has been awfully slow [Music] down the slowest moving shows I've ever seen except for the one I saw you do last Thursday that was terribly slow yes and your condition the Super Chief would be slow but that's it oh yeah if you're wondering about this I'm celebrating the Dodge of victory and if it wasn't that you'd find something else to celebrate and I was celebrating the victory for 32 years but Frank talked shut up ah I wasn't coming here just on my way I slipped on an ice cube sled right in here are you kidding when we were coming over here tonight I was a little concerned about us driving when the minute the minute he got to the wheel I was worried was the left rear wheel beautiful so this is the time all these people get in our room I don't know I watch this show every night my genie in me that's her name we watch it every night and this is this this has been the slowest show I've ever seen huh what do you say Diego I agree well as well number one we want to ask you fellas what do you only go out in the daytime with these gray suits such a dress that this is a midnight show what are you doing with the great clothes on you guys should be in the balcony this world just for The Tonight Show and you come out with Grays all right Phil how's your Foster never have anything like us on the show did you this is the slowest show I've ever been up thank you Hey where's that Johnny baby it's back there don't cut that out is he out making a buck again or something no he's doing a very worthwhile benefit as a matter of fact in Chicago at McCormick Place I really don't know he's uh he's out doing it don't light anything near him Frank his skits here may I just pay you a compliment no sketch is not here oh good that's fine yes you make pay me a compliment I don't know what it's about I just want to say I've been watching your show I think you're absolutely great on it I'm with you [Applause] we'll be back in just a minute [Music] listen I'd like to get serious for just a moment you're gonna be taught every time I say something to Dean you'd like to get serious what are you cracking or what just tell you how much I appreciate uh boys Township this man he has the distinction of being the only man alive I ever ate a dry Olive now what I was going to say would have gotten a bigger chuckling boy if you got something funny to say Frank sing it [Applause] that means Charlie that he drinks martinis with wet olives in them all the time Jazz what's up hey Dean don't don't do like that don't ever do like that I watched you rehearsal of your show tonight yeah and I just want to get serious after to tell you how much I appreciate it but you said yeah that's the only time I say the word serious he goes off what's serious about what what can a fella I got a hit show and that's it what do you want from me what are so serious about introducing wonderful people like Ella Fitzgerald and George Global you know that's nothing like that you're gonna show you stick with it there's no practicing we don't practice we just go out and do it that's it can I get a night certainly that's not a lighter this is the lighter [Music] [Applause] we'll be back in just a moment after this word from your local station foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] figures for the king of beers is Ed McMahon did you ever think about all the sandwiches that are consumed across the country during just one evening's tonight's show for example there are thousands of loaves of bread hundreds of slices of cold cuts jar after jar of mustard actually tons and tons of pickles and when all those sandwiches are enjoyed here's a safe bet on what's being enjoyed right along with them that of course would be Budweiser but is the largest selling beer in the world here's the beer that makes it Mighty clear what taste is all about so raise your Stein at the friendly sign but wiser king of beers if you're planting an icebox raid tonight go right ahead and pour yourself a Budweiser to go right along with that sandwich it could possibly cost a little more but as the echo says it's that Budweiser taste that makes it worth it it is worth it it's Budweiser I'm going to tell you John he's going to be thrilled when he comes back and find out that this whole show was sustaining sponsors the whole show was floating wasn't that sustaining now we're going to avoid from one of our sponsors hey I say that later that's all right are we on now or we got another one of them things no we're on right now I don't know what you're doing here today all the Bishops are in New York [Music] no yes Frank it's a done get that uh what is it you're just doing a show for tonight or how many nights you're going to do a show I signed a deal with NBC I do it one night a year on a gentile holiday hey you do you work on rosh Hannigan I mean are you doing one show this one show now and two pitching Wednesday aren't you [Music] want to hear the ocean hear it I can smell it [Applause] why I gotta say this was pretty dull before we came out say something Phil let's speak up don't be shy order a lot of pretty cats out here do you notice them girls a few dogs too there's one running around right there there he goes hell what was who took back them Nails what are they taking Nails back oh I love that joke that kid had brains or something else [Laughter] over here with the Hebrews grab yourself a chair well go back there Phil I just thought you'd like to stretch I had that man make a trip this week so we'll get even a score with all of your all of your holidays and stuff we had to have some kind of action going yeah yes we brought our man over here tomorrow yesterday today this show will be on Monday night cross country oh well my man has already gone home did uh Sheen see him off do you know when we're through with these beliefs we won't have enough to do a show you're gonna cut these off well I'm leaving if you're going to cut what I've been saying huh oh don't cut them off because we may not be back this way you know it's 12 30 in New York and everybody's drinking but could I have some of that there's a guy brought me water I ain't had water since I was 17. it's real water that's what it looks like you ever see what that does to your shoes arrows them right up but I'll drink it [Applause] yeah you are really a friend anytime you would drink water for a guy you're a friend I think he's nuts myself trying to talk what are we selling now dude we're not selling anything Frank except perhaps millions and millions of dollars of worth of talent what time wait till he finds out that this is not the show he's doing but The Tonight Show he'll really flip this is the The Tonight Show I ain't getting paid for this yes oh I'm getting one if I tell you what you're getting for this you'll say oh what am I getting well you better hold on tight I got him the two of you normally you would both get Separate Checks but because you both came on together you came on as a team foreign [Applause] [Applause] well that ain't as bad as a show I watched with old John Carson the other day with uh you know Robert Goulet who looks like you know Robert Goulet what he looks like an 8x10 glossy he's so pretty and wonderful and his wife they were talking about horses you remember that horses and what they do on stage oh I saw that yes you saw it yes I do I said sore you said sore no you said sore you it's not sore it's s-a-w-e song that's what I said sure but that was a terrible show it was almost as bad as the first part of this this was horrible wasn't it was awfully slow oh boy could I just look at that who's coming on next hi police see how I kept quiet Frank when you talked yes I noticed that Joe Joe baby we're saving you we don't want this to come as a shock you can't leave what do you mean we can't leave hey not for the kind of money this show pays you don't just leave when you feel like how come there's a guy in the wing going like this that's to me's dog no you can't leave I gotta leave you see Genie had a terrible accident at breakfast this morning she drank my Oranges by mistake she don't feel too good when I got up took my usual plunge right down the stairway [Applause] what did he take him back for could I interrupt and now a word from one of our sponsors l m l m filter cigarettes missed again [Music] come on over to the L M side come on over for the taste of it come on over you'll be glad you did come on over to the L M side ways [Music] hands tell the story in an L M taste tells the story so come on over just for the taste of it [Music] inside [Music] just for the taste of it look at John one night listen you uh you Two Fellas did a a couple of promos regarding uh Dean Martin Show on Thursday night on NBC and we happened to have it and with your permission we would like to run it Dean oh I didn't mean to wake you buddy what'd he say I don't know what's the difference just leave a call you've got to give me some filming what we did yes no I want to explain to the audience that you kind of kitted around and broke each other up and everything and what's a promo what was like when you go to school the teacher says everybody who wasn't left down is promote all right got it now oh yeah don't tell them what I said Frank what so let's see it I've never seen that you're gonna show a promo that I had on my show no that you didn't you're giving me 116 dollars I've been 60. oh six he gets the 60. no 320 for the two of you oh double the weekend God get drunk tonight boy why don't you go out and get sober I can do that inside I'll be ready to run this so here here are the list of promos you and Frank made freaking Frank [Music] thank you well that's it folks you've done a little bit and I think we ought to get out of here yeah wait just a moment hey you'll mind your business you got no lines I have to have I haven't any dinner yet Frank if I tell you these people have been here since 11 o'clock this morning that's their problem that's not mine and none of us wasn't a doll before we came on you know I missed Highway Patrol again [Laughter] you want to make 2 000 lira did either of you you you wouldn't there's no way there's no way sing what are you cracking I'm just asking [Music] I'd sing but I ain't got no guitar [Applause] listen I got a powerful voice but I can't go across the United States without a microphone [Music] uh I would like to do a little song Joey with the your permission uh this being a late show it's kind of a saloon song [Music] [Music] hey drink up all you people order anything you see [Music] and have fun you happy people [Music] the life and the drinks on me try to think that love's not around it's unmistakably near my poor heart ain't gaining any ground [Music] because my angel eyes and here Angel Eyes the Old Devil sent they glow unbearably bright can't you see that my loves misspent misspent with Angel Eyes tonight [Music] so drink up all you people order anything you see and I'll have fun you you happy the love and the drinks on me pardon me but I gotta run the facts uncommonly clear I gotta find who's now the number one and why my angel eyes excuse me while I disappeared [Music] thank you I thought that was a hint but nobody came out with any jugs or nothing that happened oh boy I gotta get out of here I'd take a sleeping pill but it makes me drowsy yeah put that over the rocks and now a delightful story about a product more people are using than ever before I'd drink anything right now oh For Heaven's Sake Frank can we talk a little bit about the picture you're currently involved in uh the picture involved in is called uh assault on a queen that stars vernalisi um uh Yan Yellen Kellen his name is he's a Swedish actor who who was a fine actor and we have Richard Conte my old buddy and Tony francioso it's almost a completely old Italian cast we tried to arrange it but we had to get one Swede in there somewhere censorship and I see you in a bad address and uh it's a uh it's uh very quickly a story of a group of people who are uh fairly tired of the humdrum of life and they raise an old U-Boat that's been on the bottom of the sea for 20 years that's a U-Boat no that's not my boat maybe it's a YouTube if I find out you're doing a picture just for that joke [Laughter] and we uh we stick up the Queen Mary [Music] was a Queen Mary is a sponsor no stick up [Laughter] and that's what we're doing Joey and uh you want to hear what I'm doing after that well yes I would like to drinking resting I drank so much last night my hair hurt gonna do any Wednesday in the in February I'm going to do that with the with the Sandy Dennis who did the Broadway show and uh in the interim I play The Sands Hotel for about three weeks what other plugs should we get in now that's the deal I have you know for the month of January what's that that's another big engagement I got coming up you're off Monday nights so I have to work are you going to fill in on them I'll be at the airport and they'll call me and I'll run Gordon cray you know does all my outdoor work with the big boys he does the county fairs and all that stuff he was on Dean's show tonight he did the well he he and Sheila McRae were both on yeah but that's what I'm going to do what are you going to do well I made two pictures last year they're still at the drugstore yeah I dispatched thing called a silencer yes I wish he would silencer it's the American James Bond my name is Matt Helm cool I killed 15 guys one afternoon one gun didn't reload at all except you know when I went to the bar oh thought it was taller this sure was dull before we came out yeah you know what's going on right now I tell you that you know the funniest part about the show is the way he's been flicking the ashes on my hand instead of the ashtray all right curious well-being here Joey yes been watching four or five years I was just hoping I'd get to get on this thing well I wanted to know how much I appreciate the time the fact that you would not that it's your cause it's your show you what let me finish before they think I'm a Nazi how much I appreciate the fact that she would run directly from your show right over to here you got the wrong party we'll be back in just a minute after this word from your local stations [Applause] [Music] I just saw Betty buddy Greco standing over there and I just want to congratulate him on his big smash at the Coconut Grove buddy [Music] Johnny Carson will be back tomorrow night and Johnny's guest will be Bill Cosby George Siegel Carol Anderson Paul Revere and the Raiders yes Frank did you bring the ice cream truck with you when you came over from Nicole I'd like a crushed almond something I again would like to thank Phil Foster Julia prowse Frank Sinatra Dean Martin for giving up somebody Kennedy and Jay Kennedy for appearing here tonight well we know when we're not wanted you're throwing us off right no that's it bye [Music] thank you this program was pre-recorded [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Johnny Carson

Views: 779,006

Keywords: episode, best, funny, youtube, funny videos, comedy, laugh, funniest, stand up, comedian, hilarious, stand up comedy, johnny carson, tonight show, humor, sketch, johnny carson bloopers, johnny carson show, johnny carson animals, johnny carson monologue, johnny, carson, tonight, show, funny video, best of johnny carson, funniest moments johnny carson, frank sinatra, dean martin

Id: bKGo_7G8vuQ

Length: 28min 17sec (1697 seconds)

Published: Wed Jun 14 2023