ENTRUSTED SESSION4

I love what we're going to talk about in the session because I feel like these are a couple of the things that I know being on the road and meeting a lot of people there are certain words that you hear over and over again and questions and I really want to answer them well and then I sort of come back to I feel like I kind of have some of those same questions you and so I just want to kick it off because we have this sweet girl who's written and her name is Karen she's only 21 years old remember that number 21 and she feels that God is calling her into some kind of ministering she's asking how would you encourage her in her relationship with God and just her trying to be obedient to him no matter what her calling is I feel like that's one of those words is calling there are so many people who are wanting to be obedient to God who are really listening to him who are kind of struggling to feel like they're following what he's asking them to do so I would love for you to speak to the hatton and kind of encourage her and everyone else who's nothing out what I would tell her right now start getting to know Jesus that really what you're doing your step is say yes Lord whatever you're asking I want to say yes to it give me the power of the Holy Spirit to say yes to it and would you just guide my life in such a way bring me to a place where I'm getting to know you the real you and start walking this thing out let him plan the course the Word of God will be a light to that path it's going to be just it's going to give you just enough light to know where to take the next step but we don't need to know what's 20 years now Angie I say this to Audrey it would scare us - yeah yeah you know what if you had known you were going to be a hazard wife at a job I mean you might have run the other direction could you have ever seen Melissa in those years when you were in high school and you were studying for a test at stoplights on your way to school that you would ever be studying the way you study now so just we surrender to it and then let him take a step by step I love the way you said that though because I think for a lot of people they hear the word calling and they think this means I have one calling and I need to find it then maybe my calling is to be a teacher or to be a writer or to be whatever it is and it really it isn't that there's one specific thing that we're just trying to figure out it's another being sensitive where God is [Music] I'm always so relieved when you guys come back you know they're just nothing like the thought that you're going to show up and people are going to just decide you know what I'm over this series well I pray that the Word of God is burning in our bones and that something's happening with us that he's doing something through the series that we're ramping up our effectiveness as mighty servants of God that's what we're called to be that is our reality that is our calling and we've been entrusted with the gospel and the gifting to share it every single one of us and that is where we're getting traction so I pray that's happening what I'm going to do with you today it's going to be rather unique to our series and even unique to some of the other series that some of us may have done together because I'm going to use a lot of testimony i've always used my story sprinkled throughout any kind of Bible study because I believe in sharing not only the gospel of God in the words of first Thessalonians but also our own selves because you have become very dear to us that's what Paul said that when people become very dear to you you share the gospel and you share it by also sharing your very life that is a beautiful part of the process and something that I love but I don't usually do it in one segment in such a concentrated way as I'm going to do it today and there's a reason for that you have been studying 2nd Timothy chapter 2 that's what you've studied all week long I'm going to have you return there now if you would and I want you to go to the very end of it I'll start reading at verse 20 all the way through 26 now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay some for honorable use some for dishonorable therefore if anyone cleanses himself for what is dishonorable he will be a vessel for honorable use set apart as wholly useful to the master of the house ready for every good work so flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness faith love and peace along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart have nothing to do with foolish ignorant controversies you know that they breed quarrels and the Lord's servant let's not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone able to teach patiently enduring evil correcting his opponents with gentleness God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth verse 26 and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil after being captured by him to do his will I cannot emphasize this enough in case you have not been on the page with the homework and have not been able to enter into that I want you to very clearly hear the wording it would say something very similar it would have the same power to it in any major translation you are reading that they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil after being captured by him to do his will one of the very earliest things I learned about warfare was that anything God does Satan attempts to counterfeit and I see that over and over and over again what we would consider to be Christianity 101 would be that we are seeking the will of God we talked often about seeking God's will in a particular matter Lord I want to know your will I need you to know if you don't already know that the devil also has a will for your life I need you to know something else to remember that we've been talking about being entrusted with the gospel and being entrusted with sound doctrine we older women are exhorted as as as as fervently as we could you younger women long after we're gone you have to be teaching sound doctrine generation after generation after generation after generation we have to have teachers rising up that are teaching the Word of God not just about God's love which is rooted in the Word of God but that his scripture itself we got to have sound doctrine let me tell you we're going to know that we're losing sound doctrine when we lose any kind of doctrine what ever about there being a devil and there being legions of demons and there being a real live hell it is in the scriptures you would find it all the way from the beginning in Genesis chapter 3 all the way to the end of Revelation Jesus himself if someone were to say well I go mostly by the words of Jesus Jesus said continually he affirmed that there was a demonic world there was the power of darkness and there was the devil so we just think that's archaic thinking and that's that's getting old in the day in which we lived and I'm going to tell you something the big joke will be on us because let me tell you he will come for us there's nothing the enemy loves more than for us to be unaware for us to not realize what he is capable of doing it for us to think he does not exist and if he does not exist and how could hell exists then after that why in the world would we really need salvation why don't we need to make that decision if there's no real hell do you see where this is going so he has a lot stake to make sure that somehow we lose that whole doctrine that there is a kingdom of darkness and we have to contend with it while we live here on this planet and I got to tell you something this this is what's going to take place today I want to share with you a little bit of my story bits and pieces that have to do with this particular text of how I came to an eye-opening realization of what the enemy was really capable of doing I was not raised on any kind of warfare doctrine many of you may be about my age and you were not either I don't know how to explain exactly that we knew how to be saved and we knew how to serve but we were not necessarily discipled in the scriptures and raised up to walk in victory like I never even heard any kind of doctrine of the Holy Spirit in my entire young it would only be in confessions of our faith when we mentioned the Trinity that that that that that part would even be talked about so I knew nothing of this kind of a battle and then I begin to know a little bit about it but nothing like the eye-opener that I'm about to share with you and so here's what here's what happened what I want to do today is share with you about five of my biggest eyeopener's and in all of my years since the time that I really sensed the call of God on my life at 18 years old I was saved as a young child but at 18 it was a big game-changer for me I I mean it was like that morning I did not sense that same thing something I had an encounter with God there was no voice there was I saw nothing it's what I lack of a better way to describe it this is one reason why we don't go here very often is that you can look in the scriptures and calls of God take place all sorts of different ways if you are in Christ according to Romans chapter 8 you girlfriend you guy friend are called that's how this goes down we're all called but there was this sense I was serving a group of sixth grade girls at a missions camp and there was just a sense when I was alone with the Lord and just getting ready that morning I as something was just flipped in my heart and I knew that my future was going to be entirely in his hands and that something new had happened with us and when I told someone of my experience they said I believe you've had a call to what they call locational service I was 18 so it started this journey so it's been four decades since then and I just want to share with you what the high points the big eyeopener's have been for me and by hi I don't necessarily mean good I mean where the eyebrows hits the top of the head something you could not have imagined coming I made a decision this afternoon because I I have cried off and on all day then the other day when I was preparing this very same message I cried and cried and cried as well and I decided I said it out loud to the Lord the sadness and I'm not going to cry when I give this lesson so I've made a decision I'm not going to that I want to speak with the strength that the Holy Spirit has given me I don't just want to bring you sentiment I want to bring you a testament of the Scriptures the power of God and what I encountered with the darkness and I'm going to make a couple of points with you my five biggest eyeopener's of my last 40 years and it starts with this one right here this is number one the forces of evil are meaner and a blur than most of us ever pictured I want you to know that today I'm not giving my testimony to you today about the most horrible time of my life because I think it's fun I'm sharing it with you because you need to know that these things are scriptural they are right there in black and white in the Word of God this is what we can encounter and we better be ready for it when it happens we better know that attacks are coming and we want to be rooted and grounded in the word and ready to stand firm against it the forces of evil are meaner and a blur I've never used the word a blur in a blanket all these years but I liked it tomorrow I thought about no it's got to be a blur if I say a blur city's a blur I had no idea of what he was able to do of course he's not the antithesis of God he's not God's anti his opposite equal we're told and second Thessalonians yet when Jesus is really tired of it at the end of time it says that he is just going to breathe on him on the man of lawlessness and he is just going to be blown into oblivion so when he's done all Jesus has to do is take a deep breath and like who I mean you talk about literally just being blown away Jesus will really honestly blow him away so that's gonna they're not they're not equal but opposing forces but the devil let me tell you and the kingdom of darkness is a powerful force a power for us and we need to have our eyes open to it the forces of evil are meaner enabler than most of us ever pictured I want to take you to a little portion I want to read you out of Revelation 12 turns me to the last book in your Bible Revelation chapter 12 and I am going to do my best listen somebody throw something at me if I start teaching this text I just simply want to read it to make a point if I start teaching it throw something at me Revelation chapter 12 I want to read verses 7 through 12 I just want you to hear a little bit of terminology here I feel the power of this and the warning of this now war arose in heaven Michael and his angels fighting against the dragon and the dragon and his angels fought back but he was defeated and there was no longer any place for them in heaven and the Great Dragon was thrown down that ancient serpent who is called the devil and Satan the deceiver of the whole world he was thrown down to the earth and his angels were thrown down with him verse 10 and I heard a loud voice in heaven saying now the salvation and the power and the Kingdom of our God and the authority of his Christ have come where the accuser of our brothers has been thrown down who accuses them look at the tents there of choses them day and night before our God and they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony for they loved not their lives even unto death therefore rejoice o heavens and you who dwell in them but woe to you o earth and sea for the devil has come down to you in great wrath because he knows his time is short listen there is no body no force in the universe anymore certain that God is telling the truth in prophecy than the enemy himself he has watched this for centuries and centuries he knows that God always does what he says so he's reading in time events just like we're reading in time events and he's read them over and over again and he watches the globe for every sign of the Lord Christ's coming because he knows good and well that the moment he does come that this begins to be the end for the enemy and the angels of darkness and so this is all in play because the more it looks like we're getting closer and closer to the return of Christ the angrier and angrier he gets because he knows his time is short this is what we're dealing with so the more we can look at the scriptures and see signs of Christ's coming the more certain we can become that the enemy has great wrath and he is doing everything he can to get to the children of God if you could not get to your enemy what would you want to do get to their children he cannot touch God so he tries to come for his children he wants us desperately he tastes blood in his mouth when he sees us because we are covered by the blood of the Lamb and I'll want you to understand with me what is in play here turned back to 2nd Timothy chapter 2 and I want you to notice now tell me what the name of our series is I want to hear it again in trust and I've told you I want to remind you over and over in class and also in your written work that basically when we boil it all down there are two things that distrust involves mainly and they're two G words what is it the what the gospel and then what and the gift to be able to share it so whatever gifting we've been given of the Holy Spirit to share it and the doclet of that is basically the trust and then everything associated with that so we have been entrusted but what the enemy is trying to do is prove us unfaithful he wants that in the worst way so I want to remind you of some of the wording here because we're told over and over in places of Scripture I want you to see with me it's a very beginning you study this at the purse of this week of homework look at the very beginning of 2nd Timothy chapter 2 I want to read to you verse 4 it says in verse 4 2nd Timothy chapter 2 for no soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him that word entangled you'd find that word again entangled if you looked up Hebrews chapter 12 and you locked in on verse 1 here's what you would see therefore and I'm reading this one out of the NIV since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us God has entrusted us and so the most effective thing the enemy can do he cannot take our salvation from us nothing can snatch us out of the father's hand we did not earn our salvation and we cannot keep our salvation through works we are held in the father's hand nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus but what he will do he wants to try his best to prove us unfaithful and the way he keeps us from being unfaithful with what has been entrusted to us is to get us entangled and listen is that whatever works whatever works so if something easy entangled you it's going to go for that but if it takes something a little bit more methodical a little bit more seductive then he's going to go with that anything he can do to entangle us because the more entangled we are the less faithful we will be with what has been entrusted to us so think of that as opposing terms in your mind when you think it's entrusted by God entangled by the devil you say at this time we cannot be both we can't be faithful to our trucks and all tangled up by the devil now I want to make one statement in two parts and I just bring this to you by way of a testimony I believe this with all of my heart everything I'm bringing to you I believe with all of my heart and I hope to give you some good scripture to back it up one statement in two parts you're going to see a couple of bullet points in your listing guide this is the first half of it you are not your own worst enemy you are not your own worst enemy how many of us have ever said I am my own worst enemy listen we have been giving ourselves way too much credit you have come to class today to hear oh no you are not your own worst enemy and that brings us to bullet point right underneath it but you are your own worst enemies best accomplice we are not our own worst enemy because let me tell you something as much as I have turned on myself I could not have even conceived the schemes that the enemy has come up against me with couldn't have even conceived them they were not even in my mind I've had many many seasons of warfare a many many I very rarely without a fight something's always going on there's some way the enemy's always bringing on some kind of opposition but that a lot of that is in the normal sphere of our walk of faith other times it heats up and then we have that but I'm saying is there's one season that sticks out in the course of my entire life story it's the one that I allude to often because I think people need to hear it some of you will not be able to relate in any way and god bless you I'm so thankful for that but somebody else I mean this is going to be like she's going to realize that somebody else has something similar to her story and it means everything to her that's why I'll keep bringing it so I want to lock in I just want to tell you enough of my story that somehow fits in to the scheme the enemy waged again me I grew up in a home like many of you I grew up in a home where I was very very loved and I was also by other people and by someone very very major in my life sexually abused all going on under the same roof and so I need you to understand that you would have a false idea of my story if you thought that I had not ever been loved that that is not true that is not true I had I have been loved in my life but when these kinds of things begin happening to you as a very little girl I don't have any memory of life before sexual abuse none none so as far back as I go when that's in those formative years and that's when you are developing your whole relational component I had absolutely no boundaries whatsoever and the abuse happened often on and I was not the only one but what continued was just an instability in the home and I've come to think after all these years that I am not sure that was not as it as toxic as the often on abuse to just continually live with that sense that there's nothing stable to stand on that that people are I don't know any other way to put someone to put like this that people are going nuts and that you're a little kid and I was a scrawny kid a scrawny kid you are a scrawny kid around a lot of big people I was way down in the birth order and nothing is secure here and this was what my upbringing was like except that you have to throw me into church every time the doors open and I'm telling my throat right now you better get that lump out right this minute because I am committed to no tears during a session I cannot say to you enough when people say Boyd you really loved her oh yes yes it was a harbor for me in the storm are you kidding me I believe in the local church it saved my life I fell in love with Jesus in the local church listen to stories in Sunday school from a teacher that would sit in those little baby bear chairs and her knees would be almost up to her throat and she'd show us those pictures that was my whole life I was in missions classes from the time I was a tiny little girl I don't remember I'm my life before missions either I could have told you the Great Commission out of the end of Matthew I'm Matthew's Gospel I could have said that to you by memory by the time I was four years old so this is the way I was raised are you getting this all these components coming together under this one what at that point was naturally blond head so I grew up I was very very very messed up relationally I've said so many times I think some of you can understand this I was not a rebellious kid I did I've got in when I was supposed to I was very very straight-laced at school I made good grades I was very active in school I was all of those things but in my I had no boundaries and relationships I could not say no and I couldn't I mean I couldn't say no to anybody like if someone powerful any kind of bully personality was around me even among all my girlfriends if they if it had to be this way then it was going to be that way I would have just done anything I just said what do you want to do that that's what I'll do well you can imagine how that goes in with your relationship with guys because it was just it was a free-for-all it was just a free-for-all uh-uh what I could mainly do is just I hate to be this way with you but I just you know was the long term I don't know I don't any other way to put it because this was my life it I could not I could not come up with any boundaries for anything so this is the way up all this time I'm coming to love God just making sense to anybody and so I'm living all of these things at once and and so by the time I then am a young woman I am pretty legalistic which is always a mystery to me but that's another story entirely we can always understand why we think that way but you know there are things like I didn't do a lot of things I just didn't but but I loved God and and when I married and I was so relieved and forgive me if you can't really relate to what I'm about saving it it put me out of that relational cycle I'd been in and we were married praise God and I still I'm still so thankful for that of what I was after there it worked you know what that was my man and I am thankful so thankful for that but I began to start getting involved in my church and start growing a little bit just a little bit in the scriptures but I was very much falling in love with Jesus they're not at a heart for God and we were starting our family and what I what I did I knew nothing else to do I had never even heard the terminology that we would study in Colossians and Ephesians now that would say you're to put off your old self and they'd be renewed in the spirit of your minds and put on the new self none of that was on my radar never been taught any of that all I knew to do was that you just I just stacked everything on top of it so the abused part of me and the victim and that very self-destructive part I just I just stacked on top of it so I just with good things and righteous living and making good decisions but I just pushed it down pushed it down push down well it just became a pressure cooker just a pressure cooker because you don't come from a background of sexual abuse and not have wounds I'm sorry you just don't especially if you have got a major authority figure in your life that is rendering that abuse by the time you've got all that factor going on you this is getting pretty messy but I don't even know you're supposed to try to deal with that I've never even at this point I'm not been aware of godly counseling I'm just stacking stuff on top of this and listen I come to a season where this thing starts to blow and I've thought about the only if someone said to me why then the best explanation I would have is this I was starting to walk in to my calling and the enemy knew it he knew it and the other side of that was my girls were similar ages to me when I went through some of my worst stuff I'm not I'm going to try not to be more psychological with you than that but it's the only thing I because if somebody's in Y then that's the best I know how to tell you but it came calling I the other day I'm had an opportunity to speak at an event where I was talking to them in one session about journaling and so right before I left town I just went into my library at home and I grabbed a whole stack off of my shelf and I stuck it in my suitcase most of them were spirals like that and I took them all and and I started looking at this one in the hotel room and this was the year before the season that I'm about to tell you my story within and it just killed me it just killed me because I look back on my life as a young moment and I think girl you were a wreck a train wreck and I was but that is not all that I was I read in here I cannot even read it to you this girl right here she she was falling head over heels in love Jesus I document 20 different chapters of Scripture I memorized 20 chapters the last year that I documented in this journal I wish you could see the way I talked to him and what I was asking him and what I'll put I can see just bits and pieces of Scripture I was writing out my odds were just flying open this was a girl falling in love with Jesus and it just broke my heart to read it because I thought girlfriend had no idea what was around the corner and it brought up the question that I had so many times why did that happen why how did hell you know I go from there to where I went hell does something like that happen how does something like that happen I want you to turn with me to second Corinthians 11 please second Corinthians 11 I want to reverse is 2 and 3 to you because listen I don't know I all I can do is give you what I have because here's the deal I don't know how much different would it have been if I'd have known all this I want to think it would have been different I don't know that I can't relive it but I want to make sure you know it if you're going to sit in this class and we're going to study second Timothy together and we're going to talk about an enemy who can take you captive to do his will and can ensnare you then by golly we're going to talk about this right here so that you know this is possible and so that we will not be judgmental on those that fall into snares of sin according to Galatians 6:1 we are to restore them with a spirit of gentleness and we are to be careful about ourselves lest we fall in with them that's what it says that we're to be compassionate because this can happen to anybody and take heed lest when you think you stand you fall 2nd Corinthians 11 2 and 3 say this for I feel a divine jealousy for you this is the Apostle Paul talking since I betrothed you to one husband to present you with a pure virgin to Christ and this is the virginity that it's talking about here now a virginity that we think of in in our world is of course a beautiful thing all of us would want that for our kids but that's not what it's talking about here I'm a virginity and this is was true even in the Old Testament when when Israel was was seen as the marriage partner to God and then we become the Bride of Christ in the New Testament it's a spiritual thing it's about it's about having a heart for just one God that is totally given to him in the scriptures idolatry is spiritual adultery does that make sense to anyone so being presented as pure to him is that there has been no other authority that has been able to get in on us and undermine that relationship for I fill a divine jealousy for you since I betrothed you to one husband to present you as a pure virgin to Christ but I am afraid that as the serpent deceived Eve by his cunning your thoughts will be led astray from a sincere and pure devotion to Christ you can have a sincere and pure devotion to Christ and be completely seduced by the devil let me tell you the difference between seduction and regular warfare regular warfare is hardball it is hardball seduction is curveball you don't know where it's coming from it hits you by surprise you were not ready for it or you were so weak when it came you just completely dissolved right in the middle of it is anybody getting that with me seduction isn't just straight where you know it's coming I mean it's coming it's coming from the side and you don't know what's about to hit you that is the irritant art to seduction and the enemy is an artist at it I tell you this I brought this journal because I want to say this to you I was not looking for trouble but I did not know trouble with looking for me even if you're not looking for trouble I promise you trouble is looking for you at that particular time that I just kept pushing down pushing down pushing out it stood up in me like an on foot to live that victim in me that self-destructed part in me well I tell you that thing tipped off my past came that I began to have nightmares I had all men reply and I had remembered I was not one of those that had it all repressed I remembered being sexually abused but I had never dealt never dealt and I had never let myself think through you know when you think all the way through like it would start to go there I think no no no no don't do it don't do it don't do it and I mean it was just like it was just like the curtain was ripped wide open it became an all-out assault on my family no part of my family was not hit at that time it was a full assault on my people and I full assault I went nuts cheese went nuts our family turned completely upside down all manner of things were going on things at work forties everything you can imagine a full assault all the way around us all at once by the enemy I went through the time of the darkest deepest defeat of my entire life and very uncharacteristic kind of despair very uncharacteristic I have not had a season like it before or a season like its sense this seasons do I look back at it I can remember even looking in the mirror and saying who are you who are you what are you doing it was just mind-blowing there's just nothing like self-inflicted wounds and I need to know somebody in this room knows what I'm talking they're just nothing quite like it when you sing listen I do this to myself this is what I've done to myself number two is this this faith life is a fight from beginning to end I'm just going to tell you I have learned this one for a fact this faith life that we are living is a fight from beginning to end you might as well get equipped because I promise you if you are not fighting you are being defeated or either you were of no use whatsoever to the power of the gospel right now and in that case you're already defeated because that is your job and that is my job to be trustworthy with the trust so if we're not doing that and he's winning anyway because what the enemy is after we just are so entangled in whatever in whatever there are different ways that the enemy comes at us he comes at us to detract from us to just minimize who we are in Christ and minimize who God is minimize what Jesus has done minimize to where he detract then all he has to do is distract I mean just to distract you with all sorts of ridiculous things that works too but then there's destruct oh that's what he loved that is what he loved that is what he is after and let me tell you this faith life is a fight from beginning to end I want you to see first Timothy 6:12 first Timothy we've been in second but I want you to look at first these are the similarities among many between the two letters Paul wrote to his beloved son in the faith Timothy first Timothy 6:12 says these words oh I just have to go to 11 verse but as for you O man of God flee these things pursue righteousness godliness faith love steadfastness gentleness verse 12 fight the good fight of the faith take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses he saying hold tight to it and fight the good fight of faith the good fight of faith I want you to see what that word fight is in the Greek do you see that long or do you see the word agony in there you see that word agony in that Greek word for fight and it's from that word agon which means conflict conflict and it means settling in these lengths to contend for victory in the public games it generally came to mean to fight wrestle figuratively it is a task of faith and persevering amid temptation and opposition it also came to mean - I want you to jot this down take pains to wrestle as in an award contest straining every nerve to the uttermost towards the goal so this word from which we get agony really was originally about about a contest and about competing and it was a word that meant that you were to wrestle it out to wrestle two figures you take the task and persevering amid temptation in opposition it came to mean to take pains I love that is one of the things we're learning that he said to Timothy you're going to have to take hardship as a good soldier of Christ Jesus listen we're not in sound doctrine if anybody is telling us that to walk victoriously and to walk as a mighty servant of God and you don't have to take any pains oh yes we do oh yes we do it is through much tribulation we enter the kingdom Paul said in acts 14:22 we got a lot of tribulation and we got to learn to find but there's a beautiful part of it of that finding because there's that since when he brings us to the other side of that victory and you knew you did not have that in you you knew you did not have that capability and look what God has done to take those things to wrestle as an award contest straining every nerve to the uttermost towards the goal every nerve to the uttermost something about that did you notice that it says in public games victory in public games do you remember when Hebrews 12 said since we have so great a cloud of witnesses I love that because that's all those people of the faith Abraham and Moses and Joshua Isaiah Jeremiah and John the beloved and Peter the Apostle Paul Timothy all of those so many names we don't know just cheering us on because it's our generation it's our turn make no mistake we are fighting public games the heavenlies know what we're wrestling with here if something about that makes me want to fight something about knowing that they fought and it's our turn you know I say I said to God a lot you know really honestly either you have a lot of grace or you have tor taste I told him answer I said can you not get somebody better than this to do this I think there's anybody ever ever think that like bless you Lord bless your own heart because this is what this is what you have to deal with this is what you've got here poor God anybody ever see what I'm saying left him bless him because it just feels like that but see he he picks us Abel she makes us able to fight and win I want you to see what it means let's fight the good fight of faith as a beautiful beautiful Greek word right there in a lot of ways it means all the things you think it does but but there's an additional little nuance to it that I want you to see in jot down in that blank it is a word that means beautiful the word it even means you just shot this somewhere in your margin harmonious a beautiful good it's a word that means noble if you want to jot that down it's a beautiful sight it's a good fight it is a beneficial sight it's a noble fight so we're not just fighting we're fighting a good fight you know life's a fight I tell you that you can either fight an ugly fight with people or you can fight the good fight of faith but we're going to fight one way or the other that brings us to number three even amid the evil that believers are befalls us I chose that we're believers because I've never used it in a Bible study either but I chose it because it means for something to surround us to surround us dot is continually and mercifully after our good that I have learned that I've learned when the more than I said to you I just want to go why how did this happen I mean I am but I had other times in my life when all this should have happened not not after this new idea it was as confusing to me what happened here I thought we were on our way we were on what happened what happened but what if that had been like the year before that I'm like no telling I mean it could have gone a lot worse than that but like what happened well I want to tell you so I know now I know now and I want to share it with you I want you to see with me turn with me to Luke 22 Luke chapter 22 listen I I love God so much for putting the stories of the flaws and imperfections of the people who truly were his people all the way from the very beginning we seen an Abraham when people say you know I just don't really believe that people should be restored back into ministries where they've been you know what that's an individual thing there truly is fruit of repentance if a person's not showing the fruit of repentance over a length of time listen that's valid but I am going to tell you this every person has the right to be restored as a person maybe not to a position that's all about the individual person and what they're willing to go through to come to healing and wholeness and to show the fruit of true repentance but I'm going to tell you something when we start withholding restoration from people and we respect them less we somehow have missed the whole story of the people of God from Genesis to Revelation we were freaks all of us didn't know what I'm talking about I mean nobody headed together somebody will tell me no Joseph headed together Joseph was a brat he was a spoiled brat that's what he was I mean you might got Daniel I'll go with you to Daniel but one you're going to give me one person in the entire stretch of scripture and I'm chasing partly but it's a train wreck in here and then there's God then there's God listen to Luke 22 31 and 32 22 31 and 32 if we could see it in the Greek we would see that it starts out where the youth are plural all of you listen to it because you can hear it in the NE t Simon Simon pay attention Satan has demanded to have you all to sift you like wheat but I have prayed for you Simon that your faith may not fail and when you have turned back strengthen your brothers he asked for all of them but somehow in the permissive will of God only one of them was allowed to be sifted in this way and so I bring to you the question why Peter Satan asked for all of them to sift them all but he looked at Peter and said I pray for you that when you turn back and you will strengthen your brothers yeah I want to tell you why because Peter had something that needed sifting if you ask me today Beth why did that happen to you and will it happen to all of us no I don't think the same exact thing we'll all go through harsh warfare all of us will but will you necessarily go through the same kind of season that I went through you might or you might not it depends on whether or not you have something that needs sifting that if it doesn't get sifted out of your life will absolutely destroy you and that whole victim thing in me and that whole self-destructive tendency in me and that whole thing that always set myself up for some kind of disaster in some kind of failure if that thing did not get sifted out of my life it was going to destroy me the only way I was going to be able to be trustworthy in any way whatsoever with the gospel and the gifts God had given me to share it was was going to be through getting that thing that had entangled me all my entire life out of thee and let me tell you it was effective it was effective because it was harsh and it was ugly sometimes you've got to go through something so awful that you know that you would do whatever it took to be free whatever it took it broke a hold over me of desires for just things that you know where you bear in your heart that you kind of wish man I wish I could do this okay I no longer had that desire in me to do something rebellious like that it's so killed that whole part of me that would think that there might be something that was more fun outside the will of God that thing that that's fine I still fight in my inner man about about various things of course I do but I'm saying in this struggle over who was going to be Authority of my life and whether or not that old side was going to get to keep rearing up his head this was a matter that came down to blood and I mean this was the bloodiest fight of my life and it took a course I would say that for the harshest part of it it was about a solid year the harshest part of it and I was convinced I was going to lose my mind and probably not be able to raise my children the rest of the way I was just about convinced of it and the Lord did not let the enemy do that but I for a while there thought the woman that I thought I knew I don't know where she went I know I do I don't know I don't even know who I am I don't know I don't know what's happening here I've lost my mind lost nine if you don't think that's possible search the Scriptures search the scriptures now everybody has something that big that destructive that needs sifting but this I'm going to tell you if you do have it you need to deal you need to deal or it is going to deal with you if you keep thinking this big thing has happened but you know I think I'm going to be alright I'm just going to step it down just go stuff it out it's gonna come back for you because the thing about he's our healer we have to let him heal what is broken in us we have to bring it to him it's what he wants to do instead of denying it and just shoving it down or more likely hiding it where we're living this way out in public but we got this whole secret defeat going on in some closet somewhere that is just like gosh awful and we'd be embarrassed to death if anybody knew that there's all that kind of thing all this kind of destruction all this kind of defeat all of us perhaps who are really familiar with Scripture know a little something about what Paul calls in second Corinthians chapter 12 a thorn in the flesh where the enemy was allowed to torment him over something so that he would not grow prideful over his surpassing revelations that God had given him it's a very very interesting thing because it tells us how he prayed he says three times for that thorn to be removed and Jesus said back to him my grace is sufficient for you I in your weakness see I am strong my power and my grace is made perfect for you in such a time exactly as they search the scripture but here's what I want to tell you when I when I say why did it happen to sift something that so desperately needed sifting and because that became my major thorn in the flesh and continues to be to this very day to this very day the harrowing memories I have from that season of my life the enemy uses to torment me to this day why does God allow him to do that well cause somehow oddly that thorn stands as a guard over my life it walks me up on every platform in every arena I have ever spoken in I never forget the hole I have been in never no matter who I get to minister to I remember very well no matter what hair-raising story she's telling me as the tears are running down her cheeks and she said you're not going to believe what I've done oh I bet I will I better we'll know it's just Robby Trani Jason we talked about earlier in our time together that whatever God does Satan attempts to counterfeit this is one of the things he does very counterfeits the work of the Holy Spirit do you remember when Jesus if you know if you want to assume this because this is a this is something that might take years to study out in the Gospel of John but the Gus John tells us Jesus tells us that the Holy Spirit will remind us of what Jesus has taught us the Holy Spirit is the holy reminder and you know the enemy is the unholy reminder he just brings it back and brings it back and brings it back and brings it back and if you ask me what I did to try to get over some of those memories will you make new ones and you make holy memories make memories that replace a lot of those old memories because I can't make those go away but I can make new ones but this is my consolation I don't know if anybody's familiar with the story in Luke chapter 7 of the sinful woman who comes in where Jesus is having dinner at Simon the Pharisees how she comes in homages is like weeping and and she just she just cries at his feet and she anoints his feet and kisses his feet and and wipes his is out deep with her hair and this whole scene and it's just so powerful to me because I have been that sinful woman and I felt like everybody knew everybody knew and I wanted to be the kind of person who did it right and I just feel like oh no telling how many people know about that season of defeat in my life and he said something so powerful and it's painted on the wall of my office right above where I study and where I type on my computer so that every time the enemy harasses me while I'm preparing a Bible study for you or anybody else I can keep typing with my left hand and I just point at the scripture with my right hand and it says this therefore I tell you her sins which were many are forgiven thus she loved much for the one who was forgiven little loves little matei something I don't want you to have two seconds of leash in your mind to think then I might as well go ahead and dive into this sin that I have been so tempted by here recently I've been so tempted in that situation at work I've been so tempted over here with what's going on in my marriage I've been so tempted here financially I've been so I might as well just go ahead long into it because when I come out of it at least I will love much that is not how this thing works you do not want to trade paths with me I cannot even tell you how costly it has been I cannot tell you what care it has brought me I cannot the cost has been so I'm so unbearable I just want to be this Frank with you that I had seasons of my life where I would just go make this short because I'm telling you Lord I can't bear my own memories so I'm not asking you for a long life I really honestly Lord make it short I knew it to date he obviously chose not to make it short since I made it here but that whole time has guarded me from a whole lot of isms cynicism I cannot say in all these decades sense that I've had five minutes of cynicism about spiritual things maybe about some spiritual people but not spiritual things it has guarded me from perfectionism which I promise you will kill your ministry it will kill your ministry get over it you have also been forgiven much is that we just got to regard it all of us have been graced we've all been splashed and bathed and baptized in grace and it God helped me delivered me from legalism number four is this God purposely set up the system where it demands dialogue and dependency to function properly this was a huge eye-opener to me huge eye-opener when I came to realize oh wow like a prayer a day doesn't keep the devil away that's not how this thing is going to go down I just thought you know you just do this and you just kind of go on your merry way and this all works really well and we all mind our own business and if I act like the devil is not there feel like like I'm not here and this is how this works we'll know now I know all these years in that what God is after whether it be through warfare or the stresses of life or whatever burdens we have whatever present tribulations we have and we all have them here's what I know now Jesus is after an invasive relationship with us that's what he loves that he is after he's pushing that envelope of our communication and our communion with him continually he wants us where we are dependent on him where we are constantly dialoguing with him I don't mean we can't go and have a regular day and have have a blast and have some recreation and do all those things but what I'm saying is this where we know we are completely dependent upon him where he doesn't just like like serve us when we need to go do something that is spiritual but that he invades my life I came to learn that any part I had to myself was going to destroy me so what I was going to have to do is I was going to walk victoriously I don't walk over there in the grey zone I can't I can't not with my past I cannot do that I don't want anywhere near that hole I used to think it was fun to kind of slide my foot over toward that hole I don't think that's fun anymore I want to live in the light right here and I want invasive take me over do not leave me five don't leave me five inches to myself I want your life is the life I want its wholeness to me is a joy to me it's laughter to me it's health and wholeness to me that you are what I want that was the thing that I came out of it knowing even to this day just the whole trust factor sometimes I'll be preparing a message and I'll just be at my wit's end it's just not coming together and I've got I mean it's just like time to give it like it's the next morning and I'll still like every now and then he'll just press on my heart trust me with this can you can you go to bed and Trust and I'm going to give it to you cause I want to go no one must a fall not because I need some points I will grow pray need some points I got a class to teach in the morn I need some points and I study but sometimes I'll just study my head off and I'm going like this is not coming together and every now and then I'll just feel like he's saying to me would you trust me because do do you do you make it come together or do i this happened just a couple of days ago go to sleep and rest your mind and trust me now when I almost always do is I leave my Bible open to that portion because I want him to study during the night I'll go to sleep you stay away you keep your eye on that word and have me an outline in the morning that's what I need I will wake up the next morning and it will be as clear as a bell why did he do that trust Reliance that's why he does it I want you to turn to one last place with me I want you to see 2nd Corinthians chapter 1 because remember when I've told you over and over again can I have mine why why this happened why why I mean do know like Lord nothing would have been further from my mind then that season of defeat listen I've lived through all the fads of the last decades I've lived through honk if you love Jesus you know you're my age you remember don't you Donna honk if you love I never did honk and you know I repented like I felt guilty that I didn't I was too cool to honk but I had a lot of conviction about honk why can't you honk just hop one time home no I couldn't on and you know WWJD I've lived through all that up but here launched it when I'm going to tell you there's no shortcuts here it's a living life of Christ invasive faith takes a river party now this thing goes down and that's where it's meaningful that's where the victory is and if I may be so bold that's where the fun is that's where the fun is I want to answer that question why why does sometimes we go through something that we think has put a sentence of death on us I was absolutely certain that would kill me and I wanted it to I'm sorry to disappoint you I know nobody want to put it please do please do somebody listen to second Corinthians chapter one I want to start reading to you at verse nine indeed we felt that we had received the sentence of death but that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead he delivered us from such a deadly peril and he will deliver us and on him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again I want you to see that because anytime you think of why have I been allowed to go through something that nearly killed me then I felt the sentence of death I can't tell you all the reasons I can't tell you all the ins and outs of it I can't analyze it with you but I can tell you that at the end of it what God can work from it is it if you come out of it and you have relied then on the Lord Jesus Christ instead of yourself listen life is about to begin that's not the end of you that's the end of the old you this is the beginning of life in the spirit I want you to take down one last thing this is my huge one I don't even have a lot to say about it this is what it is five words for number five Jesus is the best part that's just all there is to it Jesus is the best part I did not see that coming I didn't see it coming I mean I liked him I appreciate anything I mean who can do that who would do that I started liking him when I was a little girl but no it's more than that I thought well you know he's God and there's so much he does in US and there's what he does through us I hope that pales to just life with Jesus he himself he surprised just to know him to know him to walk through life with him to go on a walk and and and to just like talk I mean it's just like talk out loud like a crazy person just oh you know sometimes I'll tell Mike I forgot to tell you and in this course he already knows but I love that sense that he's sober like what and you know and to know he never talks back to me no I've never heard his audible voice but I've sensed him closer than my own skin at times and I've tasted I've tasted I've tasted the presence and that is what I want for the rest of my life he himself it is not what he can do for you it is not where he can take you it is not even what he can deliver you from it's jesus this was the thing all along it was him he was the prize anything entangling you from knowing do that you won't dealt with because this is living I want you to stand to your feet and I want you to do something with me as we close there's this wonderful verse because you know so what do you do now when you're this side of something that's stupid anybody what do you do I can't I can't change that I have not returned back to that kind of defeat in decades since then I certainly have never go through a single day that I do not have something to confess of sin never not ever when I hear people go you know I occasionally still do sin I'm going over what in the works I know I don't wanna have lunch with them either I don't know how to deal on the happy form but we are they getting that look whatever they're drinking I want that I want that but that's just not been me but I've not been back through that because getting that girl thank you god is dead she's dead so here's what I've got Psalm 40 verse 9 says I have told the glad news of deliverance in the great congregation behold I have not restrained my lips that's what I came to class to say today that's what I have tried to do four years of ministry just stand there and proclaim the glad news is there anything better than that's a glad news what is the difference between the glad news and the good news well it's good but you're glad about it you're glad about it think good is what it is but glad is how you feel about it what would happen if somebody said how are you today and you said I'm glad how different would that be from I'm good because they'd have to go see bland always has a reason you're not glad unless you have a reason see I think they're not just good I'm glad I'm not just good I'm glad because I have been delivered from my sins that is why I'm glad so here's what I want to do I thought I make a few statements to close this will be our benediction I'm just going to make some statements and if you're glad about it at the end of it if you're all so glad I just want you to say out loud and in unison with one another and I am glad just try those words you say and I'm glad for instance if I said I've got to love the world that he he gave us His only Son and you would say what so I'm going to make these statements as we close but listen don't say you're glad if you're not know so if you're like I'm not real Don my real guide about me I'm okay about if I can't I'm glad I didn't don't do it don't do it don't do it but if you're glad then just go ahead and make that confession because this is how we're going out of here today kids don't have to turn out like their parents our past has no hold on our future God's mercies are new every single morning we evil one will not get the last say our enemy will fall into the trap he has set for us for those who love God and are called according to his purpose every single thing has to work together for our good we have not outs in Christ's ability to forgive us Christ will return and claim his kingdom and there will be no more crying no more pain no more suffering no more strains and the last one I have to say is this and the last enemy Christ will slay is death itself some 90 people for you O Lord hath made me [Music] praise you five pray [Music] Oh

Channel: Isabella Colvin

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Length: 69min 13sec (4153 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 13 2020