Dr. Matthew Stevenson | Rated R | Levels of Intimacy

I have heard that I have blessed some people and that I have devastated others this this message has been like a two-edged sword and so you need to catch up with the discussion go to our Facebook page our YouTube page and start revisiting this because relationships are the meaning of life they are a stream of income a stream of wealth whenever God wants to move differently in your life he sends a new relationship say it is so now the adverse of that is also true whenever Satan wants to perpetuate an agenda in your life he sends a new relationship so every agenda every propaganda of both heaven and helm will be advanced by the appearance and the arrival of a person pay attention to this you need to pay attention to who appears in your life and it is very important that you investigate who sent them as I might who sent you you would be a dummy if you did not investigate the origin of this person are you in my life to advance me to mature me to help me grow or are you here to rob to ruin to waste to make time tell somebody you too old for that now know many of you are in a crisis where you don't want to admit that but you're not getting any younger okay and because you're not getting any younger you need to apply your heart the wisdom part of what that looks like is discriminating really investigating your relationships and we've been learning a lot last week we learned a lot this morning we learned about friendship and fear how many of you were blessed upon that we learned a lot about the spirit of fear and we learned that your fears primarily show up in the quality of your friendships and a lot of people don't realize how distorted their outlook is on life on people and relationships if they are okay with having fear but just like you reject cancer and sickness and disease and poverty you must reject fear on every level you must learn to hate the spirit of fear because as long as fear is active and present in your life there are two things you won't ever be able to see you and other people say it is so so I'm gonna teach you something today that is rather cool I hope y'all got my images up there okay I'm gonna teach you something today that's rather cool and of course we're talking about this is booths cool so eight o'clock is friends and and and platonic relationships and all of that 10:30 is booze school okay so if if you if you married this will help you if you want to be married this will help you if you planning to date this is going to help you okay and you will probably be a better person if your mama went to boo school yo daddy should have went to boo school so you should not act like this is beneath you the church should be talking about relationships and because we don't talk about it you Negroes google it and you figure it out on your own way and you mess people's lives up amen tell somebody Aunt May can't heal everything there's some things antibacterial ointments cannot solve amen and one of them is life amen life the word house in the Bible means a lot of different things sometimes it means tint it means tabernacle but one of the biblical meanings of the word house is generation it translates into generation in the Hebrew as for me and my house we will serve the Lord it was not referring to a physical abode it was talking about a generation that statement was saying after me things are different as for me and my house it's called the house of Saul the house of David so the term house in the Bible does not just mean one thing it means a lot of different things so you are a house and if you are in a relationship whether you are married or not you have actually built a house because a part of house building is romantic involvement now some of you are building a house with somebody you would never live with but if you're building a house you have to build it on the right foundation booing and dating and courting is house building it is legitimate house building and you are literally and that's assuming that you're dating somebody of the opposite sex you are you are literally investigating to see if somebody is worth having children with so as you are dating and going out to eat you are literally preparing this person to sponsor another generation of your story and some of you sell fly mean just just just irresponsibly force your unborn children to have in competent parents because you don't look beyond what they offer you okay so when you're dating when you're looking for a wife or being courted by your husband you really do need to spend some time thinking about what they're worth beyond you because what's going to happen is as you move into a potential marriage into a potential family you have now assigned the next generation to whatever is or is not in that spouse so it is a very serious thing and woe unto you who don't think you take all of that because you are going to perpetuate another generation of disaster drug addicts drunks pedophiles if you don't start it at the parental level the problems continue that's what a generational curse is when the parents play the children pay and so you need to be very serious about who you build the house with [Music] it's still a the right concept with the wrong person to build a house you need a counterpart you don't date similarity you date counterpart you can take that to me whatever you mean if that offends you go to another church but you date counterpart when you look for people and are attracted to people because they remind you of yourself then something's missing what's missing is suitability the biblical word is not compatibility the biblical word is suitability I have on a suit that suit is custom it was measured to me you won't be able to find it anywhere else in the world it was tailored to me the biblical definition of suitability is tailored now it doesn't mean that it started that way but something can become suitable once it's measured to fit I will make a helpmeet shootable which means that rather than looking for sameness you need to look for suitability does it fit now if you don't know who you are or you are in denial theoretically about your size your gut your back them thighs then you try to force a fit there's a lot of people who elongate relationships unnecessarily trying to force a fit and there is nothing like trying to squeeze some of these dashikis I know y'all had hell trying to put them on ain't nothing like trying to squeeze something over your head I know I'm right about it there's some stuff I need my wife's Hill to get off I'll be late Lord Jesus yeah I got a big back I realize I need assistance for certain outfits but there was nothing like the strain of a wrong fit oh it is so I feel not good help today you can get along and it'd be the wrong fit you can have history and it be the wrong fit you can have been hooked up by people you like it just is the wrong fit you need suitability does this fit now you're building a house that house has levels and dimensions I'm going to take you through how to build the levels of intimacy here is my premise intimacy is not something that grows on its own you really have to build it you build the intimacy you progress intimacy let me ask you all the question how many of y'all have a front door in your bedroom at home your bedroom leads to the porch how many of you have a front door in your personal bedroom right nobody so here's a problem when you start a relationship insects in lusts in physicality it is literally a front door in the bedroom I'm just getting started you may go say man you ugly to say man the front door belongs at the front door now I'm gonna show you what I mean by that turn to Matthew chapter 7 you build intimacy that's why we teach don't be hugging and smooching and kissing and smacking at the beginning because by the time you've done all of that the way you see that person is different and so when the monster in them shows up you are now physically attached cuz you've been kissing and smooching it you put the front door in the bedroom and if that's not safe for your physical house it should not be safe for your relationship house say it is so Matthew 7 verse 24 this is how you build a house you ready now if you're from the hood you're gonna enjoy this because I'm gonna give you some real hood principles on relationship building and it's okay I have nothing to prove so we're gonna give you very ghetto principles that can be useful in every sector of life verse 24 therefore whosoever here is these things these sayings of mine and doeth them I will like him liken him unto a wise man then who was a wise man in Jesus's idea whoever builds his house on their age on their sex drive whoever builds his house on Christian mingle on mood no you build a house on the rock now how many of you are saved wait wait because these are only applicable for say people if you not say this is not gonna work where the enemy what that means your relationship should be built on the rock and if the relationship cannot be built on the rock it is not sustainable he says I liken him unto a wise man which built his house upon the rock and the rain descended cuz they will be rain the floods came all of these represents different seasons in a relationship if you only think that sunshine is gonna be in your relationship you're in la-la land the rain descended the floods came the winds blew and beat upon the house and it fell not because it's not about how the house was built it's about what the house was built on so it says it was founded upon DES come on open your mouth battle that upon them and every one that heareth these sayings of mine and doeth them not shall be likened unto a fool which built his house upon sand why is that important because sand is a biblical picture of time many of you rush into relationship because you feel like you're running out of the sands of time I'm this oh I'm that old and that all of that is sand when you build your relationship on sand the rain is gonna descend this is 27 the floods will come the winds will blow is gonna beat on the house and it's gonna fall and great was the fall of it a great fall how many view ever had a bad bad bad breakup how many you are trying to cry not to cry cuz you about to have one right now I don't want to make you think I don't believe in relationships I love when people get married and when people date as long as they say for really not living a secret life I think it's amazing when people actually find spouses and people that they want to be paid but there are certain fundamental things that I know y'all don't know and I blame the system okay before I give you this first of all apart what I'm gonna say is this marriage typifies a relationship of Christ and Christ and okay he commands husbands love your wives as Christ loved us and gave himself for it here's what most of you go wrong maybe you don't have to help me cuz Sister Sledge is about to come up after me okay who made the first move Jesus or the church didn't the church doubt on the cross the church went and found Jesus who made the first move you fast women who pour yourself I told you I get aggressive today out of church posture to run up after somebody who ain't made a move at you oh Lord I can't hear nobody Jesus made the first move and because Jesus made the first move the church responded to the first move so when you all up in ATMs all up in there but let's get to know each other let's go out I noticed you in church today you have already set that house wrong cuz you are a place women don't pursue me women don't pursue me okay what your mama say I don't care what your daddy say I care what your mama say women don't pursue me I only got two more Sunday so I got to preach this I don't care what you call it I'm just trying to say let's get to know each other hey you don't pursue if it's Christ and the church you don't do nothing - he makes a they'll ask you for your number don't give it to them come on out I got the father anointing on me if he'll ask you for your number don't give it to him if he'll bite you to the so don't invite yourself if he'll ask you to coffee don't say I'm free this week nobody asked you sit down somewhere Christ and the church it is so principle number two now I don't like this I know go ahead go run up out of here right now why you got a good option it's too much Christ and what does the church respond to truth Jesus is truth the church acts in response to truth so the church responds after having heard the truth want somebody pursues you in deception if anything is alive from what's pursuing you you don't allow yourself to be pursued if husband and wife man and woman are Jesus and the church then when he comes he comes in truth this is my real name this is my real age this is how much money I make I have this many kids Lord can you send a man angels in here I got this many bankrupt this is what I want if you mean business you're not gonna let levels of true come out after we'd already slip dip and chipped in flip you're going to tell me the truth I'll try Jesus and the church now behold now look at how important marriage is the Bible begins and ends with a wedding ceremony listen to the premium on this there was a wedding ceremony in Genesis and then the whole culmination of the ages in Revelation is a wedding ceremony the supper of the Lamb but look at what the book of Revelation says about the wife the bride Christ for she hath made herself ready now you understand that in the context of the church but you don't understand that in the context of biblical femininity the Bible says you are to ready yourself that is a personal responsibility of yours to live as a wife before you are one a man that finds a woman finds a good thing no no a man that finds a why and you can behave as a when I'm not about his wife I'm Tom Dow a wife you can behave in modesty you can behave in character you can behave and wisdom with money and discretion you can behave in your tool my Bible tells me a loud woman is worse than a drip on the rooftop it really is a read the book of Proverbs the Bible says a man will live on the roof rather than live in a house with a nagging woman and your nag button don't get pushed when you're dating this on before then you don't notice it coz it's around other [ __ ] so husbands pursue husband should be christ-like that means if that man does not resemble Christ you ought not allow him to pursue you I know that's deep and mr. gülen's spooky but it's very simple does he look like Christ I understand he has a great job okay understand he has tremendous potential but you ought to be looking for the Jesus you ought not be looking for his pecs and his swag and his gold teeth if you can't see Jesus you all not let him pursue you am I making you mad yet this is not working okay so here are the levels of intimacy put up the front porch we're gonna build a house today this is gonna be very practical okay first of all you have the foundation right the foundation is what the rock so if you ain't on the rock then you ought not be trying to rock with him or rock with her okay you get your life on the rock and then you got something to bill what is this no give me another port this this and nobody in here grew up on the porch like that you seen the point I ain't never seen a porch like that you got ninety percent black fold you put up a sign up put up a real I grew up while they google the new image I grew up 64 24 South Langley in the hood and the ghetto and in our culture and black people culture pay attention in inner city culture the porch is social you you you you go you walk past your friends are there your neighbors are there and it was literally a full quality day to spend a day on the porch I mean unfortunately before people had lives and careers you will get you some watermelon some little frozen kool-aid cups there were 25 cents old on a corner and you would sit on the porch the porch was social you seldom saw just two people it was a place where you talked it was a place there so in the beginning of relationships after you have built something on the rock you go to the porch what is that that is assessment assessment we are on the stairs I've not trusted you to turn no locks I don't know you enough to cook we are on the porch men of God when you are on the porch with women of God don't make commitments don't make implicit or e statements sit on the porch on the porch you're assessing is this something worth conversation is this something worth dialogue what happens is many of us build relationships past the porch straight to the hallway but you have to start after the rock you go to the porch let's talk let's be social now on the porch what do you see you see the trees you see the dogs you see the other neighbors what are you learning this level of intimacy I'm trying to show you why we have to pray so many of you out of soul times is because intimacy should be dispersed in levels on the front perch porch you learn their outlooks what do you think about life are you a Democrat are you a Republican where you want to go many of us ask what's your name after we didn't drop down drawers fine place to figure out what you like in life I've already seen your birthmark you see how that works I'm sorry I didn't catch your name what's your name say front porch front porch is what you figure out there Outlook why cuz when you date when you marry when you engage you are marrying a person's perspectives their views on life their views on people and many of us could determine at the front porch if this is something we want to go to at the front porch now at the initial assessment I'm done nope you a lemon I wanted to do with you but don't go past the porch come on say don't go past the porch that is assessment that is assessment that is also interest healthy non-committed interest is okay and for men my wife and I dealt with this this week yeah that's better for men the way we get interest is we learn we learn your personality after we decide we want to look at you now you can call it shallow you can call it empty but it's a myth that men are shallow and women are not that's a myth when you go up to a man interviewing them to see if they can take care of you it's the same degree of shallowness it's just turn the opposite way we like what you look like you like how we can take care of you so don't embellish our shallowness over yours amen glory to God and I have seen women date ugly men who were rich if you don't believe me look at some of these rappers you know darn well if these brothers was nobody some of these NFL players be looking like the Cookie Monster and women throw themselves all that a wife it's domani you while security we won't sex no they don't want to say nothing in here I said you want security we want sex so what happens is if we see it that determines if we're interested it's not our fault if we're not interested and you can't get mad because we're not interested can you look beyond my skin to see my inner beauty no ma'am I cannot that's between you and the Lord I'm not here to look beyond there we're not there yet I just want to look at them here I want to see if I like them live is this too real for you I like what I see and then what I see interest me I'm going to continue the discussion me and my wife dealt with this this week lady said that's not in the Bible I said shut up dummy I don't have to have Bible for my type there is no Bible that says you must like this place it's not about to outside will sleep with yourself for me I want somebody that I can leave the lights on with I want the lights off to be an all too real today I want lights on I don't want to have to use my imagination that's why I got you God is not leading you to somebody you don't like I cannot scream if you don't like it got it leading you to it I hate when people start off it wasn't my type stay away stay away or keep it on the porch you understand me that's interests as interest that's interest now if your assessment if your interest is good then you go to the hallway you go to the hallway you unturned the first lock which is the decision to progress and the hallway is a bit more exclusive whole bunch of people can't fit there so in the hallway that is the place and the point of transition amen and it always flying now what is the hallway it is pursuit once a man says I'm pursuing you first of all don't assume pursuit I'm talking about levels of intimacy as a female you don't assume a man is pursuing you and as a man you don't just do a bunch of Acts and not put language to what you're doing here's why men especially when they're immature they will pursue you and won't put a language to it because they have commitment issues so they'll interview you get to know you be Tama how many kids you want to be like every just friends I never said I was there what why the heck are you interviewing me you have dragged me into the hallway and now that I'm trying to figure out why only me and you are fitting in here like this gospel woman of God if he don't name it it does not exist and you need to determine what level of information you give based upon what he named it what are we doing if I'm your bro if you're just getting to know me to this certain stuff you're not going to now don't assume pursuit man man if you're going to pursue make it clear I am pursuing we don't build relationships off of signs I gave you all the signs you can't you read the signs no we're not doing sign language in here this is my life are you what are we doing here say hallway that pursuit is the invitation to the journey that represents the level after the front porch initial assessment is about father y'all on there I'm trying to decide which one I won't after I'll clarify which one I want to take into the hallway I'm going to now bring into a more exclusive setting it's me and you I'm interested in further inviting you into my house so you need to make it clear clear so it is a journey we should be journeying after the hallway we're taking a long walk into life after you trust them in the hallway you turn another lock now these locks I believe our personal fears at every level of intimacy you surrender another fear so after the porch you turn a lot it gives him what access because what prevents access in your life fears then you bring them into the hallway BAM I turn another life you can never really build true intimacy without disclosing what you're afraid of so you have to turn Lots those are heart knot knots heart ties that's how the heart becomes joint okay now then you go into the living room the living room this is again when we ain't got nowhere near sex yet this is again a very social place this is where you learn how people live you you got to figure out how they act in front of other people in the living room you're looking out the windows you planned I know there's some of you don't believe in this I play spades understand prophetess we play space okay now I know you don't think they're saving holy whatever I don't care I play spades and I play spades nastily I hit tables I call you out your name I play James Brown in the back and they're not talking tongues see that's too much for you time for you bro we play spades blackjack backgammon a man glory to God what am I saying it is a mistake to bring people to the bedroom before you've seen them with other people in the living room it is exclusive now but now you're watching them interact with other people I really believe that before you start like proposing and talking marriage you really need to observe this person in the context of friends because although y'all are liking each other you're not exempt from this person's relationship skills and if you notice that a man or a woman behaves with friends indifferently don't think that because there is the element of attraction that you're going to be exempt at some point the way these people this person is with friends is going to affect you so don't ever into a person's life on that me and you against the world toxic relationship survey you need to be interested as a man or house woman is with her friends you need to be interested as a woman how does he interact with his brothers and if that's healthy you can now make another decision to build further in the house but you need to find out in the living room what this person's hobbies and habits are hobbies habits what do you enjoy how do you involve others because in times of stress and in times of strain what many people do is go back to the living room you got to know what you enjoy doing I grieve for women who had a powerful single life I mean they were traveling they were taking over the world and get married and a husband is a Turtledove like you don't go nowhere he's just a bum don't hit baby like y'all ain't dating no more y'all way vacation that boredom was always there you were just willing to sacrifice it out of desperation lady if you like adventure don't date a fuddy dudd don't date a buddy though you held my foot looking you cannot date a fuddy dudd why cuz I'm telling you woman oh God you gonna miss that activity you gonna miss that [ __ ] you might wanna get married to stamp in this house I'm gonna go somewhere and every time you like let's go to Paris let's go tomorrow he'll I know let's just chill I just need you right here about me that stuff only works when you're horny after the sex is over you're not gonna want to lay in that house with him all day you was gonna go now and climb in through a park run in oh I'm looking at some women right now y'all so bored I need to pray off y'all hug cause it's boring I can see it in the spirit right now I'm tell you what I know take the living room now after the living room you've observed these are levels of intimacy you've observed hobbit habits hobbies their social interactions and practices you are now ready for the bathroom the bathroom why it is selfish listen you don't even go to my kitchen before you've washed your hands I'm Tom two levels of intimacy if you don't sanitize yourself you don't deserve to go to the place of communion you have to wash yourself so if we're all in the living room that's social that you're learning me we have interest and attraction but now if I'm thinking about taking this to the next level I've got to do some personal sanitization so I've got to make sure that everything from my past I've got to make sure everything from my journey I've got to make sure that all of the traces of where I've been even G even God told Moses to wash himself take them shoes off you didn't my presence I don't want that in here and what happens is many people try to go to the kitchen and the bedroom and they not shower they've not washed themselves you wash yourself before you get serious Oh y'all look slow you wash yourself before you get serious you don't get serious and then wash yourself you wash yourself before you kiss you so what is that look like okay me and him or she and me and her are in the living room we've been doing group dates and we've been going out let me take some responsibility and deal with my rejection let me deal with my father issues let me deal with my sin issue let me stop this porn crap let me come away from weed and alcohol I need to wash myself why you can infect other people of dirt and germs just cuz you need them don't mean you if you want this person in your life wash your hands say no romance before repentance say no romance before repentance if you won't romance you need to repent wash yourself with the word because which and here's why it is responsible you are inviting somebody into your life those struggles and habits and bondages are now going to become home for somebody else so if this stuff is not done then when I step into your world I'm stepping into that stuff it is so selfish to date before you delivered I know you don't like that understand but it's selfish it's okay if you want to live in your bondage that all you want but I'm not sad enough to be married to some pothead submit something I gotta stay marry you and still be lonely cuz you didn't wash your hands clean yourself take a season and wash yourself then you go to the kitchen you go to the kitchen every major turning point of Jesus's life was done over food when he wanted to disciple his people he would take them to fry fish he would take them to - to dinners why it's intimacy this is another level of intimacy this is eating this is the breaking of bread this is where you start to get to know each other at the final level before the bedroom you go to dinner you start to engage this person now that now dinner when you're dirty is different from dinner when you clean some of you treating your kitchen like truck stops open all night anybody can come in and go no no no when you have home training glory to Jesus you wash your hands and you dress appropriately for dinner this is now where we're doing interview how what kind of wife will you be what kind of husband will you be and at this place because you clean you're not worried about making a fall in your flesh because you dealt with sin before you came to the kitchen okay so now I can handle the one-on-one date with you because it would actually turn me off if you tried to seduce me before I clean myself I could have been on my back with you but now that I'm clean if you wink or you try to come on to me I'm gonna see you as the devil cuz I clean myself I don't say nothing in here if you try to tell me where we going tonight I'm going to become personally insulted because you trying to make me go and pick up dirt that I washed off myself that's the only point that you should trust the kitchen me you 101 if you've done with dirt if you're not done with dirt don't go to the kitchen be integral be honest if you got the kitchen and she looking all along you and he coming all over the table on you and you turned on and you need to go back to the bathroom get a cold shower I hate y'all said nothing bring yourself back to earth because you can't handle that here is what I'm trying to teach you you cannot handle the levels of intimacy you may be wanting if you're not processing it in this way you're going to have and here's the word pre mature intimacy you don't start relationships with telling your secrets you don't start relationships with going all up until your bondage all of that stuff is exclusive information that manner that woman is gonna take all that stuff and be right with whoever they choose to marry and hear you all raw a bandit and scatter cuz you two gave your heart your life your bodies and somebody won't even commit to you so you're at dinner you're breaking bread the kitchen is also the place of Covenant this is where you need to be paying attention to how well this person keeps a promise see the reason this is messing with a lot of y'all brains is because y'all do this backwards y'all start in the bedroom and then come to the altar and go all the way back to the front don't know the kitchen is the place of covenant do you keep your word do you have a covenant keeping potential how do you define flirtation do your friends know about me what do we believe about opposite sex best friends see in my house I can't talk about yours we didn't do that she wasn't coming to me time I sum all this my male best friend I didn't slap him at her I too gave him both a left hook no ma'am you are mine it is care do not go hand oh man best friend and if you're out there you like but that's a real adult you got a soul tie in disguise you need to make a choice I'm talking to y'all funny-looking tail it's a soul tie surely as Jesus is Lord you need to make a distinction should no man have the type of access to you that I want end it now cuz some of you women do that mail best free thing for secret crushes this my bro okay yeah right all right Sam Dean what you mean you got these women sisters you get a lady and she and your best friend start grilling you I suppose I smell this in here you get a woman who your friend start questioning you about so what does she like Oh what you doing why I seen her what do you all report to this vixen when you try to move on with your life I didn't do that stuff we don't allow that a man sir Jesus when you decide you want to make a woman your wife you put your other female interactions at bay and you turn them women into men of God listen bro I'm moving on with my life I'm serious now this is a big deal when I got married that and because I married very young and when I got married and I don't regret it when I got married I had a church full of women if you'd asked me then I'd have told you I got the fastest growing church in Chicago and it wasn't I just had a lot of women and and I and it proved itself because after I got married I had a church split on them when they moved on what they liked it was like peace my bad god has leading me somewhere else and especially cuz I came out the dark I choose nobody from in my house cuz I don't think Sheppard should be sleeping with sheep there's a whole nother message I went outside my church while I'm working it here I'm not gonna pass to you and then try to get you pregnant it's not what we're doing up in here so I went all the way outside of my region so when she came in the women was like and who is she but there were women that were closer to me relationally you couldn't have paid me date raped me convinced me to sleep with nunim but they was closer to me because I didn't have a woman once I got a woman the pressure is on the interaction I mean don't be hard I had a church full of women leaders I didn't know they were serving me because they wanted me I thought they loved division but when a woman came man I'm just telling you but listen and we got a small charge I was just using what I could to get what I want okay I'm like I don't know they just come on count this money girl I got a vision lord have mercy but when the woman can't honey behind when the woman came she spotted that oh no that's not a trustee that's not a prayer warrior she wants you and so what I did was I took the word of my woman y'all don't want to hear that cuz she was one so she knew how women act it so I said okay I don't see it but if you do is over you brothers need to stop fighting your women about what they see in other women I'm telling you now women no women I'm a prophet of God of the highest order but there's something about women and I just don't get and she'll call it years before happen I'm like are you stupid ain't nothing gonna and sure enough oka have breakdowns and meltdown on my way I'd be gosh darling you were right about that women no women something gonna argue with her about my boundaries with another woman but they started they started like I would have meetings and they would be like oh does she have to come these are women in my church oh if I tell you can you keep it discreet when I started saying no they just couldn't handle it I gave myself boundaries because I was decided a man that is not capable gara Singh and putting parameters around his interaction with other women has simply not chosen you when a man has chosen you they're going to put boundaries around their interactions with everybody cuz now all of their interaction is in the direction of one woman it is so they want if you walking up to them after every service like who is that why were you standing up when apostles say hello ma'am chill take the message and move on he's teaching you where he is and what he wants don't fight don't force move on somebody is going to want you after the place of covenant then you go to the bedroom amen the kitchen is the place of covenant but here's why the bedroom is the highest form of intimacy like you literally women are created physiologically and I want you to pay attention without going into sex ed you are receivers so you I give you a C sexually speaking you take that and cultivate that see this is why it is so important that women get healed God created you with the capacity to hold stuff in so women especially when you've not had a good cry a good weep that stuff is still in you affecting your femininity women were created to weep it's your outlet it's how you don't become harsh and rude you need to spend some time crying it will protect your femininity you cultivate that see nine months and you give me back a baby so you see how that works I give you receive you give back and you gave it to me bigger than what I made it or bigger than how I invested it in you so the sexual chambers are really the highest form of intimacy here is my our altar calls of how they look you take all colored demons bring them into the highest form of intimacy which is nakedness and then you go back track oh I can gave it to you now so now we got to go to the kitchen and eat so we can learn each other so we can make sense of how we just acted on impulse okay you want to go to kitchen maybe I need to go and try to involve myself in your circle search none of y'all answered the door from the bedroom that's old-school folk knocking on your bedroom to let you know they outside that's old-school we start at the porch hi how you doing to the hallway from the hallway to the living room from the living room to the bathroom from the bathroom to the kitchen and from the kitchen to the bedroom it is so now I don't get into this and here's why the Bible says the two become one / the highest form of intimacy alters your identity everybody you've had sex with is a part of you I know you make sex social but it's not I know your culture makes sex social this is just social sex there is no such thing as a one-night stand the DNA of that man is in you if you don't believe acts believe me at your nurses actual re s actual sexual practitioner and condoms are great but it's not safe sex safe sex is sex in marriage it is so cuz you may have escaped herpes you may have escaped chlamydia and gonorrhea and syphilis and all of that but you ain't escaped heartbreak you ain't escaped that that bipolar disorder that that man put in you a man's DNA goes in you huh and then of God you put who you are in another woman so think about how dysfunctional this culture is you walk around with 20 people in you that's where your mood swings come from you've been to the bed with too many people not in my house I know what you do now my wife and I host sometimes my wife will get the idea to host it'll end up being my responsibility because she's not gonna cook for the people she's gonna come and be mommy yeah yeah yeah and then like in ten seconds she's just gone you don't know where she is or where she went and Here I am stuck like laughing about stuff that I don't want to laugh about talking to people I don't care to talk to and do you know all of that but you don't walk at my house and go to my bedroom no no no no no no no no no you don't walk in like oh I have to invite you to the different dimensions of my house I don't like well [ __ ] up in my house and go on my refrigerator it irritates me I live here you'll pay no bills how much you to look the cabin is up my old god help me I bite my teeth like now I could be although I don't like when Camila eat off my plate I have territorial issues I don't let she and we've been married what 13 years if she still do it like I'd be like would you stop this just busting cuz it almost made me feel like my personal rights have been affected like I need to allow you you have to actually if you can have some of the state boy you ain't gonna eat it no way I'm right but that's my right I have rights don't eat on my plane can't stand it I feel violated I need the right to choose how close you are to me so these are the levels of intimacy now many of you are at a different level from the person next to you my warning to you is don't start it in the bedroom because there's so much you don't know that's the root of a lot of heartbreak and it's the root of how a lot of houses are built backwards you in clubs torquing and and and shaken letting folk take you home straight to the bedroom and you have no information no data look at our culture set it up doors in the bedroom but you got a whole process to go through and intimacy should be being built amen now some of you I'm gonna tell you this and we're closing we're done if you have severe abandonment issues you're not going to do well in intimacy because when people feel abandoned by anybody in life a part of what they do habitually is easily abandoned people so if you're the type of person like if you were adopted if you have like fault if you were grown in a foster home if one of your parents died in an early age or a later age and you never coped with or resolved your personal abandonment a thing will abandonment is it's not right or wrong it just happens you can't control having felt abandoned like nobody took responsibility for you or if you were one of those very rare children who had to raise your parents because they were either they mentally [ __ ] or decamp door some of you grew up in the homes or your parents were sick and eland you had to like be the one changing the diapers and all of that stuff although you were you what a part of what they did to you was grow you up a lot faster than what you should have so a lot of the like the psychosocial emotional components of who you are have not developed so a lot of you are your emotional age is a lot younger than your physiological age like you're 35 as a person but really emotionally you're 12 and here's why people stop developing at the place of their greatest trauma one of the reasons why y'all don't do intimacy well is because of a crisis called Arrested Development you are a grown boy no ability to handle responsibility no ability to handle pressure all your pressures you give to your woman no ability to stand under household you start growing at the place in the point of your trauma does that make sense to you even when it comes to same-sex issues you are really looking for parental experiences you really are this this is why around here we don't bully and bash you we know it's wrong by the Word of God but we love them just like we love liars and all of that why because it's the same pain that manifests in a different way it's a it's a it's a journey for acceptance that's why they sleep with people who are like them do you understand me that demon to come up in a woman and tell you only a woman knows what a woman needs he's that spirit and I have never and I'm not mocking I want to hear this think about this guys if you want a masculine woman why don't you just go get a man what is it about you that wants a woman who isn't like why don't you just it makes no no logical sense because it is it is not logical it's a nurturing wound and it comes from abandonment having been dropped by a maternal figure or dropped by a teacher I have seen people not cope with rejection well ever so then they learn seduction and they master seduction at the root of it is rejected rejection if you were rejected all your life and you learned that you can snare people with your breasts or snare people with your eyes or snare people with your hips you use the seductive skills to make you feel better about your personal rejection now the greatest problem with this is that it's going to affect your worship if you have abandonment issues you will never believe God the first time it's going to take for him to repeat himself over and over and over again why because you were groomed in an environment of people who breaks promises who are inconsistent who don't do what they say who are not what they say and so when God is like I'm trying to reach in there put my integrity in there you brazed guarded don't obey don't respond because you're living your life through abandonment and some of you abduction you are in a relationship that stole you hijacked you pulled you out of the place God had you I know the pattern there are people who are more stable than they have ever been in their life and here comes a relationship and they get kidnapped out the season kidnapped out the moment you were halfway done with your deliverance process and because you were more done than you had ever been you jumped Rotel into a relationship that you were not ready for but if that man loves you if that woman loves you tell them I'm not done I've got a vicious [ __ ] unfinished business with God and if they're gonna stay there they're gonna wait until you get ready and they're not gonna move on what I'm teaching you how to do is develop an ear for the snare an eye for the snare listen to the language nobody's perfect I know but I'm not trying to be without flaw but I'm trying to do is be like Jesus and if my personal attempts at righteousness offends you you're not for me so we're not gonna be together and smoke weed come on church we're not gonna be together in no threesome we're not gonna be okay what I used to do with you I've made a dish and from now on my decision is dictating how our dates who I date where I'm going because I'm keeping my decision intact I put this yes I gave up everything I've had for this yes snap somebody said keep it yes keep the yes keep the yes come on tell somebody keep that yes keep that yes come on there's gonna come a time when it's the only thing you don't you give that yes don't you take that yes back you keep that yes that's the only way you'll win that's the only way you'll live in peace that's the only way you'll be favored you must say yes to God and every yes to God is a hell no to the devil you must say yes to God you must keep that when it hurts when it's painful would you confuse with you're lonely that's what the devil's coming for your yes he wants that yes if you say yes to God I'm surrendering my life is yours my future is yours I don't want this life I want them desires no more my answer is yes that yes sends out a signal in the spirit and everything that used to have access to you can smell it because of yes is like a bait my god and when that bait goes out the devil is like oh that cause that's really the highest praise I know y'all think it's hallelujah but I think God want to hear yes they're more than hallelujah I understand what you believe hallelujah no I believe he wants to hear yes cuz there's a lot of people saying praise the Lord that their lives have not become a praise in the earth you need to yield break your will and back give God what he wants he's been pursuing you it's time that you respond the right way and everything that used to get you to change your mind is going to come the biblical word for his temptation Oh lovers hi yeah yeah yeah I feel over my old desires old appetites random memories they don't mean you bound it means it's trying it's trying to creep back in it's trying to come back you could very well be free but you're not gonna stay free until you learn how to tell the devil no you must tell the devil no it is not a real victory if you have to avoid it to be free you got to look in the face of who you used to be of who you used to sleep winter of what you used to do and say I understand that we used to be a thing but we are not a thing I'm not gonna break up with your own text message huh I'm not gonna break up with you on Facebook I'm gonna look at you in the face and say no devil you're not worth my gee literature you now with my destiny you not worth my prosperity you now worth my yes cuz one day this yes is gonna get interest be able to catch this joker here and it's gonna get me play I'm working in here he's gonna get me windows the connections opportunity I'm gonna cash my hold on to it I said hold on to it hold on to it hold on to it if you're in here and you've been celibate for a month don't let nobody make you feel bad there is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus you're gonna make progress but don't make the devil make you feel like a month is not enough if you used to sleeping around every day and you don't give nothing that poor muck you got one victory we still got a battle but you gotta stop and praise at the bit this is a demarcation you want to celebrate that was a time where anytime I had a sip of anything I was having it but today I am free from [Music] so it's okay I understand it's a battle but what I'm trying to do out of the compassion of God is teach you the power of a day stay there baby I'm gonna teach you the power of a day if you win this thing on Monday and I'm talking to cigarette users I'm talking upon addicts I'm talking about people on meth if you give it up for day take it one day at a time I dare you wake up on Monday and say Lord this Monday belongs to you all 24 hours this is you I'm not gonna overwhelm myself we're trying to pretend about this week but I'm surrendering Monday and you give God that Monday and then Tuesday comes you give them that day again okay Lord here's Tuesday you helped me through it yesterday you made me through it yesterday if you did it Monday you can do it Tuesday and then hope they come that's the hard one cuz now you mad at work you frustrated with your life but get on your knees to God I give you this Wednesday you're gonna have to help me get my flesh if you will do something on this Wednesday to help me make it out praise you I'll give you glory point help me if you do that you'll be out of fornication in no time you'll be out of lust in no time see some of you are looking at the entire cake you need to destroy it brick by brick I just saw a whole bunch of bricks coming out this sky God is getting ready to tear some walls down in your life brick by brick don't be mad cuz a hole but start that jokah at the bottom get out of here rejection I don't want you and then when you start [Music] so be encouraged be encouraged come on tell somebody be a salut you know what I hear my spirit there are many of you who need to be encouraged in your deliverance you need to be encouraged in your deliverance deliverance can be very discouraging I'm telling you delivers can be something that saddens you because some time is gory it's bloody it takes longer but I'm here to encourage you in your deliverance whatever it took you to get free you got to stay there to stay free and you may lose some time you may win other times but don't you quit you've got way more behind you then you do it in front of you come on I encourage you right now stay in the race come on hold on if you see a picture if you fall ask God for forgiveness but whatever you do wake up the next day because the Bible says mercies are brand new oh I feel the spirit of condemnation coming up off of you I feel the spirit but embarrassment coming off of you I see the spirit of shame breaking off of you come on you the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus a if God is in you if God is in you here is more than the world get you straight back look come on grab somebody to say stay there stay there Oh baby means I grew up sighs playing now that's why you need real friends they'll tell you stay in there stay in there stay in there stay in there I feel the anointing on that come on stay in there the devil has no rights for you until you quit stay in there stay in there [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] I feel God trying to arrest this building I want you to lift your hands for a minute and just let the jealousy of God come over you for a minute we will move on but I feel like God is trying to move you into greater realms of worship I want the minstrels to begin to play the jealousy the furious jealousy of God come on just confess your need of him Lord if you're broken if you're tired if you're weary if you're a few if you're exhausted if the pressure of your deliverance is really heavy if you if you feel like you're trying to be free for more people than yourself just to experience adjust but refreshing right now come on I dare you take a few minutes of just empty your come on empty your heart right now come on ship em all nations open you come on worship that worship Him be encouraging your deliverance come on come on it's been assaults tickets Bernard I've been in this world for years I've been tried to where's Emma - tired come on my heart is tired sometime I don't know where to go it gets boring for me it's excited to go the other way today [Music] I compare myself to you in the name of Jean something fresh I need something John come on dude adulterer right there [Music] my confession is water the name of this [Music] I'll stay [Music] Skinner my friends [Music] going your life [Music] the decision to trust you to trust you with my decision sir come on I wanna [Music] they can give it to you thank you whatever you to walk away [Music] stop [Music] [Applause] give you give you a fantasy I give you every fortune I give you every day I give you every I give you every ten I give you every nerd I give you every birthday I know you know what you doing [Music] [Music] [Music] your sacrifice we were rich so here's my sorry you can you can't watch 2850 [Music] I'll dedicate my polka well come on at the world [Music] [Applause] it's your budget yellow is its young [Music] come on Copland that horn right off the bat hard so get you did you [Music] take it take it take it [Music] [Applause] in the name of Jesus in the name of Jesus I curse the very root of abandonment in you speak death to the seed of abandonment I rebuke it in the name of Jesus the roots of that seed that has you feeling unworthy unwanted it unworthy the power of abandonment in your life I break the power of that in the name of Jesus and I speak the word of God's truth over you that you are accepted and you are provided for and you are upheld in the name of Jesus that he will not allow you to fall but he will uphold you with his right hand and he will not allow your adversary to devour you or to consume you because you have made the [Music] [Music] so were you that the worst is over and the best is just Jesus now thanks be to God who giveth us the victory through Jesus Christ our Lord to God who giveth us the victory through Jesus Christ I said thanks be unto God who giveth us the victory through Jesus Christ our Lord thanks be to God who causes us to try [Music] I normally don't do this and I want you to be patient because I feel the unknown name but I want you to find somebody and literally bear hug them come on put somebody in your arm get up let's activate this and don't do the Christian thing I mean embrace them come on embrace them embrace them come on there is a revival happening embrace them they need encouragement in their journey come on love it they they need encouragement in their deliverance it's hard it's lonely come on hope there the devil wants them to lose hold them the devil wants to kill them the devil wants to swallow them come on hold it right now the devil wants to consume them the devil wants to eat them alive come on embracing the devils try to confuse your brother The Devil's trying to cut Hold'em until you feel the heart of God what dimension you feel the fire love break out in their lives come on come on come on the spirit of abandonment keep off of you in the name of Jesus your emotional issues are great check your affection issues are prejudice if that name of Jesus come about powder burns the love of God the passion of God bless [Music] [Music] [Music] come on switch up by somebody else find somebody else come on come on find somebody else in [Music] somebody I feel the ignore the G bucket I'll kill you you don't know the batch put somebody in yours come on you some people have never been home come on welcome no strings attached we want the fire fifteen on it we want the [ __ ] come on come on we want the fire come on hold them I'll care if you'll know come on busy come on Branson it's been a hard season they've been a hard season come on down I won't [Music] that you can do to make you succeed then I can pray to make you succeed then I can succeed we close Mikko every [Music] come on switch find somebody else to hold activate activate come on we can move out you're wrong don't you the back come on embrace your brother come on IVA meet you bill with you I've been meaning to build and get to know you come on grace if that's what you really need come on dude [Applause] we want the fire come on my leader we're on the fire we want the fire we want the fire the pie [Applause] the buyers of [Music] none the pyres of the Lucia [Music] No go pick up kept power ever is a plug Subin table [Music] come on break out of this place [Music] Oh average [Music] the car that's what you mean [Music] that's what you need [Music] Oh somebody's getting some energy right now I know what I see nothing literate has been tiring you the process admit exhaustion but your focus Oh [Music] oh boy [Music] the powers of judgment are being broken criticism insecurity inferiority I see the power of self hatred being broken off of you [Music] I feel glory I said the powers of self hatred thank you for your fire thank you for your fun I feel something moving thank you for your fire thank you for your fire thank you for your fire thank you for your fire [Music] [Music] we will not let hell win we will not let the powers of darkness devour our brother or sister we're going to do everything we can to let our brother live to let our sisters succeed come on God is blowing on your relationships I said the Spirit of God is blowing on your relationships and he's bringing the right people around you glory to God and he's scattering the wrong people from around about you there is a revival in your heart and in your life and God's trying to seal the deal come on point to somebody say he's about to seal the deal make their declaration over somebody you don't know what they're trying to find out of their time is I see the exit side over your hand [Music] is giving you away this steak come on church be encouraged I see a way out [Music] away about to send you away these next rains are gonna be these mixed conversations are gonna be away [Music] [ __ ] up there is a [Music] [Applause] [Music] call rate your car I'm trying to move it come on look it's amazing there is a way out there is a way out there is a way hug come on over [Music] so love you all reticle be encouraging your deliverance be encouraged in your deliverance be encouraged in your deliverance don't surrender it stay there the season is turning a new day is dawning stay there those are your instructions stay there glory to God stay there I said stay there that was the last instructions Jesus gave the twelve stay there until you be endued with power come on you got to stay there look at somebody say just stay this and it may not feel like fasting is working and prayer is not working it may not feel like studying boys working but I dare you to stay there I dare you to stay there something is trying to grow on me [Music] any day now any day now God is gonna change [Music] [Music] [Music]

Channel: All Nations Chicago

Views: 200,766

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Id: PJ3kURY_lFM

Length: 85min 55sec (5155 seconds)

Published: Tue Feb 27 2018