Craig Ferguson Funniest Bits Still Managing to Flirt with Hot Actresses

I've just moved here on a whim you shouldn't do that I really yeah I moved here from Scotland on a whim look happened to me it's terrible like I came here when I was 32 and and uh yeah and now I'm 50 and I'm stuck here oh gosh no it seems okay I well basically I was in Alabama oh I love it there yeah I really liked it there it's nice yeah and then I was like I can just stay in the country so I just did you got to get a visa and Stu I did that I did it oh you did here legally oh okay well you're very smart too that's what's making me feel stupid are you intimidated by stupid man very that's why I'm so nervous right now no you're not nervous come on are you uh are you nervous I always get nervous yeah here there's an audience stop it you just uh no I'm it's like an episode of say by the Bell it's great yeah it makes me feel bad I think uh sounds like pity do you like pity yeah a that's nice the Italians and ghosts and Alive people yeah so um yeah but when I was four we moved to Staten Island oh yeah I quit Lake Staten Island you do well the bit I've seen it's which is the pier and then going back the ferry yeah I went on the ferry cuz it was a bar I used to drink in on the other side of the ferry oh really yeah I used to take the ferry over get smashed in that bar and then come back sounds like a lovely evening it wasn't bad some evenings the sea got a little rough yeah oh car I know my dad was so worried I'll bet your dad was worried he'd be I'd be I'd have you under armed guard and then you moved to London how did you end up in the Doctor Who thing um well I um I just auditioned for actually like any other job yeah and um and then got it unexpectedly no it wouldn't be unexpectedly to me no thanks no if you were auditioning for Doctor Who right now you should be the doctor they should have a female doctor I think is that possible can you have a female T well of course he can you know he can you know change change into anything yes I mean you could have an animal as the doctor oh well I don't know about that no I mean you can go too far you upset me I thought we were friends but we're not friends hello Anna Hi how are you I'm great thanks you you are great you look Sensational oh thank you no you do you look very nice I like your shoes I noticed them when you came out gold shoes kind of like Cleopatra uh yeah the last time I was here you you called me a mayor and I thought you meant a horse and a May yeah you said that the necklace I was wearing made me look like a mayor but you meant to have a town you were trying to compliment me I get nervous do you get nervous when you receive compliments from creepy old men in dark rooms like this who yeah yeah oh you look nice can I stroke your hair here you you're not American I am officially oh I guess so yeah yeah I got my tattoo and everything o are you going to become an American I don't think so okay I'm just going to reside here for a while I see you just take advantage of our freedoms and then go back home essentially yeah that's fine where are you living uh Los Angeles yeah in Los Angeles but people um then get mad yeah yeah people got they said that I was um you know releasing propaganda for the Obama Administration which I was like it's a sex tape people light up would you ever uh would you would I ever do a sex tape well you know um why not I'll be honest um there might have been a sex tape that that yeah but here's the thing here's the thing it was on VHS I I got VHS yes I can I can transfer it for you really but yeah I think I mean before the internet I'm that old I mean I'm 41 this year no way no way 28 I oh thank you so it's all the B an escaped bear is in LA [Applause] Ken Ken that's very exciting that you're here to me I love the Doctor Who as you know yay that's what we like to hear and you've got the DVD I have got the DVD I actually had it before you turned up nice yeah know I went to the store and bought it myself really did you no but but I I did get it's look at that picture I can't believe this happens to you on the show that was complaining the entire time because I was too heavy for him right he's a thin gentleman yeah I mean very attractive but he's got that kind of 1970s David boy thing going on you know that kind of I'm Doctor Who yeah yeah see that it's lovely to see you and your nails are really blue wow look at that have you've G show business I got them done professionally did you really exciting yeah was that the first time no no no you get it done a lot yeah then you're telling me you're in al-Qaeda I want the bunny again no it's all right it's all right that's nice though what have you been doing around Hollywood then have you been immersing yourself in the life to have here no no um I'm I was born and raised in Maine and uh I I don't do much outside of my house do you I'm kind of a Hermit Main's good for sailing do you like yeah no I didn't well I think you need to grow up with a little more money to sale I see sort of a what do a boat is part of that so I didn't do that what about um potatoes did you have any uh potatoes sure there you are then you were a millionaire if you had potatoes where I'm from if you had your own potato You Were King of you were like Trump you know you could write your name on it oh my potato yeah and you could sell your potato AC course small Inland ponds do potatoes float potatoes do float yes they do many late night talk shows will tell you potatoes don't float but you don't listen to them okay you ever floated potatoes and by that I mean something rude maybe maybe [Laughter] [Music] the haa or the calini what is it I do haa Hatha which is kind of like the one everybody thinks of right it's the truest form of of oh now you're going to get angry LS get angry treat well you're not going to get angry you're going to get Serene letters yeah it's it's it's all about meditation and connecting the Mind do you want me to hold that rabbit for you no it's my rbit right okay it's not the rabbit yeah no it's fine the rabbit's having the time of his life I think all right listen we're out of time do you want a piece of fruit or do you want some kind of party thing um I don't know a piece of fruit yeah why not all right uh do you want uh you want a part do you want a party hat we lit the tree tonight oh yeah all right here we go oh wait how' you do this that's not the way is it that's good that's very good that's very very good right I need to pick one for a particular reason well you know I always suggest this that well I think you know what that is it's a turnip oh is it no it's a coconut oh yeah what yeah why it's a special uh show business coconut I don't know should I crack it open yes all right then absolutely all right right watch it is that is that expens you wait until it happens then you scream PR it's never going to work out for you in horror pictures if you don't right you ready okay is that your dress uh no it's borrows go for it all right who's that at the door uh oh yeah there look there you go you can have it everybody you have to stand naked while two women like apply it to your back which is is a really uncomfortable experience sounds great to me if I don't have to do that again I would rather not well I mean I think actual pregnancy is probably you know similar that's difficult certainly I I don't know I've never experienced it but I heard a lot about it while it was going on I'm sure yeah it's a it's a thing do you fancy having kids I mean not now tonight but uh serious um maybe I don't know I don't know maybe I haven't thought about it I haven't really thought about it yeah you're a little young for that that business yet what is you 26 you 26 I mean I didn't mean to ask your AG that's why I was moving off it I mean I wouldn't ask a woman of Rage obviously but I did on TV yeah on TV that was kind of stupid wasn't it it's okay yeah I'm feeling very stupid tonight I think it called Christian she smart she's very clever I've always been very stupid when I talked to her and now and now it's just stayed with me no one else bothers with learning either get a car and you know the the driving test here is super easy I heard that oh I did it you drive around the block don't shoot anyone I think I could do that yeah it but people talk about parking so much here parking parking yeah it's the top of conversation is parking so why I don't know I hear it all the time and I'm like why are you devoting your time to this I think what happens is I think what happens because you're very beautiful and striking woman that guys come up to you they don't know what to talk about so they go you parking you're parking yeah did you manage to park okay I don't know what to say I'm from belum Hello Anna what's going on hey I haven't seen you in a while you look Sensational oh thank you sir very nice now tell me about this I I remember this film was before my kids were born it was a book that you know it was an instructional yeah yeah I thought it'd be easier I thought I'd just be reading the book Morgan Freeman style but I had to like act act story line there's a narrative sort of they made a story that's like making a story out of The Joy of Sex that's a good movie yeah you and me no no just producing it's going to all right I I would produce the joy of say yeah nothing creepy about that at all we can we can finally explore the rubber chicken thing no no don't what's don't don't say that okay [Applause] [Music] [Applause] Karen Karen Karen it's lovely to see you Karen I'm 6' three I'm taller than you yes you are look at this I have the biggest shoes in the world they're pretty big shoes so let me see yeah wow yeah you look good though is it do I look a bit weird like no no on the contrary okay me and the the Belgian boys are like what's up Bel yeah that we right [Applause] yeah all right my Belgian homies what's that yeah that's right flag of Belgium is it yeah yeah if you hold that and wave it you'll make the news in Belgium tomorrow really right so have you ever been to Belgium I haven't you disappoint me Karen I'm sorry I hear they have great chocolate they have fantastic chocolate and very good beer and very good H fried potatoes really yeah but [Applause] you right there yes yes very good oh yes Karen I've seen your television show before I know a little bit about it so you know not many people do know I love Doctor Who I'm so excited to meet you it's a very big deal anyone who works in Doctor Who I'm very cuz you know Matt Smith was here he came on the show yeah he did you're Scottish of course all right all right here quickly take this back to Scotland okay thank you give it to my family tell them you met me in an alley somewhere which technically is kind of true yeah are you enjoying America is this your first time here um I've been here a couple of times before actually we shot uh the the the two opening episodes for this series of Doctor Who in Monument Valley in Utah Utah which was very exciting Indiana Jones was filmed Indiana Jones was filmed there oh yes oh yeah well there you are then do you enjoy the Indiana Jor I do although I got a row the other day because I like the I only saw the last one first and really liked it and everyone was like no that's really no the the the Crystal Skull yeah the one with the the one the last one with the when everyone's like to show that one yeah no you have to see the first one where you know and then the other one yeah yeah I know I'm really sorry at least you're getting some advice yeah yeah well we've come to the end of our little chat fancy and awkward pause I do so much you really all right well we let's have one then [Music] [Music] an a kendri everybody Anri no are you do you think do you act do you act dumb around men so they're not intimidated by how smart you are uh I haven't I haven't I haven't tried it yet does that work would that work for you yes yeah oh I don't know anything about cheese oh cheese is I know all about cheese then you get to feel good about yourself what we do all the time oh I don't know anything about shoes oh let me tell you about shoes oh shoes then men feel good about themselves it gives them an interaction I'm learning a lot from you're learning a lot about things this is What to Expect When You're expect who else is in this film oh all the people everybody all all the actors uh really what about have you got Don Rickles in this movie sure yeah yeah yeah yeah Rickles that's I love Rickles mhm yeah well we've got we've got uh we've got like Jennifer Lopez and Cameron Diaz and Chris Rock and all those it's like one of those movies where they're like all the all the people are all these people one of those movies yeah oh do you do all the stories uh mix and match and cross over each other yeah I love well yeah I mean you know whenever anyone was in town they'd just sort of say like uh and walk walk through frame when they're having like an argument so I just like walk through like I just happen to be at this bar oh and then it ties it all together yeah oh that's nice is your leg okay you're rubbing your leg no it's fine all right is that a nervous habit you got yeah I'm really nervous really oh my God yeah that that doesn't make you nervous some mad stalker up there going or cacti make me itchy and then other cacti just excit me all right we're out of time what you fancy um mouth organ awkward pause big cash price definitely big cash price oh good for you what time is it sh St it's time for the big cash price big cash priz here's how it's done um two ways to win 50 American dollars in a bag with a dollar sign on it um in quarters that's great uh yeah do you drive yeah well then you then you can pay use this to pay for your parking I can't wait well who says you're going to win did you bring some people with you all right um two ways to win you can either answer the question or guess what's in my box here's how that works I imagine a box in my head but I don't know what's in it only Jeff knows what's in it you try and guess what's in it and if you're right you win the money and if you're wrong something awful will happen or you can answer a question um I can I'll guess what's in the box Inside the Box even though yeah yeah but if you WR something awful but you can't tell me what it is I don't know you don't have anything you want to think about it you really think nothing well maybe the awful thing has already happened uh all right yeah you can guess what's in my box are you ready yeah okay okay I'm imagining a box in my head Jeff do you have have the box oh yes I do do you have what's in the box Jeff yes I do all right Anna what is in my box is it a horse inside of a horse costume Jeff is it a horse in a horse costume we would have accepted cacti in my bed but it is a horse in a horse costume [Applause] [Music] we're out of time we that's it we're done that's it yeah yeah yeah uh [Applause]

Channel: Bite-Sized Betterment

Views: 44,501

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Id: KjglR0qlGbc

Length: 19min 13sec (1153 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 12 2024