Conspiracies (Web Exclusive): Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

hello there I'm John Oliver host of last week tonight we are off this week for Easter but we wanted to give you a special message while we're away and to do it in one of YouTube's most entertaining forms I'm talking of course of YouTube conspiracy videos science fiction for people who don't understand they're watching science fiction whenever I see a YouTube conspiracy video I'm overcome with jealousy I mean first there's a wave of this guy has to be kidding right but then it's then his jealousy at the sheer scale of imagination required to believe that the Denver Airport was designed by the Illuminati or that Katy Perry is actually John Pinette Ramsey all grown up both real theories by the way and better than any joke I could ever device in a million years now of course any great internet conspiracy video needs two key things one a wild claim that something we take for granted is actually the responsibility of robots aliens or US presidents who are also robots or aliens and two you need an eye for incredibly specific detail and an ability to make wild accusations with complete confidence so that is why tonight I'm going to make my own youtube conspiracy video and take on a topic that no one has had the guts to explain I'm talking of course about the conspiracy behind Cadbury cream eggs and if you mean are you talking about why they aren't available year-round then they have already gotten to you turn this off now you're a tool of the establishment and you're too far gone to wake up the rest of you open your eyes open your eyes America the Cadbury Creme Egg is a terrible candy that tastes like mermaid percenter covered in candle wax yet and yet every year these eggs show up in January like newly signed gym memberships or movie theaters full of films that will never win Oscars but why but why does this happen that's the question and the reason is simple if you just follow the money the average Cadbury cream eggs sold in the US waste 34 grams the same number of streets in Miracle on 34th Street a movie which takes place on Christmas what's the most memorable Christmas gift of all 5 golden rings of course gold now York's largest supply of gold is held by Germany Germany is one of the sites where Freemasonry took hold and where is the Cadbury corporation based that's right the United Kingdom which is only a quick and affordable flight from guess where oh yes Germany now now you might be asking at this point John what does gold in Germany have to do with candy in Britain that question is a false flag I ask you again I asked you again cui bono which as we know is Latin for why is bono everywhere all the time because that is the connection here musicians here is what they don't want you to know Cadbury cream eggs were originally sold as fries cream eggs oh why did they change their name what were they running from maybe their true identity fry f:r why three letters three like a triangle now take your cream egg cut it in half and put it in that triangle what does that look like the Illuminati eye Abaddon's pyramid I'll give you a second to recover now you're clearly here can't bring clean legs appear in our stores for the financial benefits of Illuminati elites such as jay-z Beyonce and Al Sharpton now I have no idea if any of that is true in fact that's wrong I'm pretty sure most of it is completely false but it felt amazing to say and it almost made sense and that is what YouTube conspiracy videos are all about thank you so much for watching we will be back next Sunday on HBO with a new episode of last week tonight until then go to bed sheeple it's late open your eyes

Channel: LastWeekTonight

Views: 9,323,983

Keywords: last week tonight, john oliver, last week tonight with john oliver, conspiracies, youtube conspiracies

Id: fNS4lecOaAc

Length: 4min 31sec (271 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 27 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/TheThemeSong]

r/conspiracy is already hard at work trying to figure out exactly who paid off Oliver to pretend these conspiracies aren't true.

[u/Angry_And_Anonymous]

From reading the comments here, this is what I've gleaned: conspiracy theorists are upset that their "reasonable" theories are getting lumped together with the crazy ones. They point out that some "conspiracies" (like NSA wire tapping) were true, and they use that as evidence to suggest that other ideas are plausible.

But then then they identify what those other ideas are, and they're crazy! Illuminati, lizard people, flat earth, vaccine denial, and chem-trail "theories" are quickly dismissed because they are quickly dismissible!

What conspiracy nuts fail to do is distinguish between plausible and implausible ideas. Then, when their implausible ideas are met with criticism, they point out plausible ideas and suggest that, because Watergate was real (for example), 9/11 was an inside job.

Holy leap of logic Batman! No! The real issue is that stupid people have trouble separating fact from fiction, and they think everybody else must have the same disability. Consider that one subreddit hosts all kinds of wacky thoughtless bullshit, and that no two members likely agree about all of the specifics of their beliefs. If your ideas were worth discussing on their merits alone, you wouldn't need to associate with flat-Earthers and lizard-people spotters just to be heard.

[u/AthenaPb]

I love people here going on about how Oliver is attacking conspiracy theories and is running a propaganda piece. He's making fun of youtube videos.

[u/Abe_Vigoda]

HBO is owned by Time Warner, second largest media conglomerate in the US. The company used to make propaganda cartoons back in the 40s to support the war effort.

I read some conspiracy thing that the CIA created the term 'conspiracy theorist' to discredit people who spill the beans about real things that could be considered conspiratorial by connecting them to the completely crazy conspiracies like Bigfoot & Elvis and Aliens and all that goofy tabloid shit.

Look at guys like Edward Snowden or Julian Assange leaking government records or people talking about stuff the military would have preferred under wraps like the Abu Gharib prison abuse or Guantanamo Bay.

After 911, George Bush jr was the first to tell people not to buy into conspiracies and that guy lied about WMDs and now Iraq is a clusterfuck and guys like ISIS are cruising around.

John Oliver is a funny guy but he also works for a fairly sketchy company that isn't left wing yet they make shows like Jon Oliver or Bill Maher that do heavily influence American liberal youth the same way FOX manipulates older right wing Americans.

The thing is that companies like FOX & Time Warner work together along with some other companies to control dissent, control the media narrative, and help their rich buddies make cash, sell wars, control resources, and fuck with people in other countries.

No one should believe everything they hear especially with some of the insane bullshit 'conspiracy theories' out there, but when people lump them altogether, it helps hide when there is legitimate 'conspiracies'.

Now watch me get dismissed as a 'conspiracy theorist'.

[u/Frostguard11]

ITT: butthurt conspiracy theorists taking this a little too seriously

[u/Tonkarz]

After watching the video: Well, there are conspiracy theories and there are conspiracy theories.

The ones that John Oliver are addressing here are the "Katy Perry is whoever that girl is" ones, not ones like the death of Vince Foster (to pick an example at random).

[u/Giltheryn]

Really funny segment. It reminded me of this parody of conspiracy theories from the movie Black Dynamite.

[u/MG87]

LOL dipshits from /r/the_donald and /r/conspiracy have begun their brigades.

[u/IggyJR]

It was done originally in the Holy Grail:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3jt5ibfRzw