Conan Catches Jordan Schlansky Coming In Late | CONAN on TBS

[Music] as many of you probably know we do not tape a show on Friday but we still come into the office and work a full day okay everyone's supposed to arrive by 9:30 a.m. including myself people on the staff started telling me that one of our producers Jordan shlonsky there he is yeah that's really him at one of our producers Jordan slansky doesn't come into the office on Fridays until early afternoon and then he's been consistently doing this for a long time well since I'm the boss last Friday I decided to look into this claim that Jordan comes in late on Fridays I had a camera crew with me I think it was a very good use of my time here's what happened I'm sitting in the office of Jordan shlonsky he's an associate producer at the show and it's come to my attention recently that on Fridays for some reason he doesn't come in till very late it is now 12 29 slansky so I'm sitting and I'm waiting for him because I want to get to the bottom of what the Jordans on a Friday he's got a kaiser roll in a bag olive oil his own mini specialized pepper grinder this it's got a giant thing of Clorox wipes now does this look like the office of someone who's afraid of my dreams allô fresh hydrating gel espresso cups he's got to Casey ever makes a friend [Laughter] step the death squad commander in its box and a backup why would you have to he was supposed to go to with Children's Hospital and he's hiding them in his office I'm curious oh of course cufflinks his wedding day [Applause] and there but he's back I'm sure these are insured by Lloyds of London if anyone ever wants to get Jordan a wedding present I believe he's registered at Toys R Us [Music] that's your reaction you just walk into your office feels like an acceptable reaction to me Jordan do you know what time it is 12:30 actually it's 12:15 it's come to my attention that you like to drift in late on Fridays okay well I work later on Fridays than a lot of people and I feel like I'm able to adequately accomplish what I need to in the time that I'm here I've prepared my daily tasks ahead of me already your daily tasks what's your daily tasks pour olive oil into it guys are all I ask you Jordan what you were doing this morning well I woke up I immediately had a protein shake I've been experimenting with oats and waiting with oats in way I was trying to avoid synthetic melted dextran which is derived from corn and I had read that oats is a good source of complex carbohydrates in the mix this way can I ask you a quick question are you wearing your sunglasses while you're making the shake you're working to remove them what do you think would be the human thing well you've studied humans on our plan yeah wild move then it makes you more comfortable okay you got up you had your way and oh shape then what then I prepared my body in various ways saved it and what do you mean okay I want to make it very clear to everyone at home this has come really happening this is completely real this isn't scripted you just said all those things this is a real person who said that people asking me how did you find that guy who writes his stuff you just said that you just said I prepare my body in various ways did you say you shaved it a digit remove your shirt please you don't mind so this is freshly shaved this area no I didn't say I shaved my chest I didn't say like a plant are you Bobby what part of your body did you shave my face oh just your face I'm say it down below down south I believe that's a private matter you just took your shirt off your ass I just asked you if you shave you appear you're John Dory do you matter you draw the line there in terms of talking about my daily grooming which was yes yes okay you can put your shirt back on wait a minute the sunglasses on believe the shirt off can I ask you why you have this instead of just a regular packet of pepper that's a pepper mill yeah I've never seen anything like this before why is it so small it allows me to use fresh pepper on the food that I eat without taking up and in order to amount of all deaths based right you wouldn't want to clutter his face why do you have these they were sent to me by whom by a woman that I know a woman sent you these correct a very definition of having this is proof that you don't know a woman you're not making eye contact with me what is your intention to hang on to these or to give them to a worthy children's charity undecided I'd like to help you be on time from now on I think that that would be good for you so we have some devices that might help would this be helpful to you this clock I don't see how you could have this at home and it would tell you what time it is and then you would know I should probably get to work my lack of awareness at the time is not responsible for the hour that I arrive in the office I'd like you to hang this one in the office and I'd like you to strap this one to your Vespa it'll be sort of the Italian douchebag flava flav I also want you to know that you're being monitored at all times by this camera I will constantly be monitoring that camera to make sure that one of my workers is a real busy bee buzz buzz this is a good old-fashioned time card you are to punch in and punch out every day I've had this machine brought back would you like to check in yeah I think the device works try again you have to put it in the very center you know how I knew it was the very center you know I've worked for a living he's a real human being

Channel: Team Coco

Views: 31,460,458

Keywords: Comedy Sketches, Conan, Conan (TV Series), Conan O'Brien, Jordan Schlansky, Late night show, Remotes, Star Wars, TBS (TV Channel), Team Coco, andy richter, best moments of conan, coco, comedy, conan best, conan best moments, conan brien, conan classic, conan funniest, conan funniest moments, conan o'brian, conan obrien podcast, conan on tbs, conan remotes, fan favorite, funny, funny moments on conan, sketch, stand-up comedy, talk show, talk show hosts, teamcoco, top 10 conan

Id: Auh74d_OG8Y

Length: 8min 36sec (516 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 07 2013

Reddit Comments

[u/50_shades_of_gains]

Lol this guys choice of words is great.

[u/[deleted]]

Whey and Oats

Prepare My body

...

/fit/? Is that you?

[u/paischu]

His sketches with Jordan Schlansky are just awesome.

[u/herrdunphy]

The espresso machine is still there! HAHAHAHA!

[u/captainmagictrousers]

I prepare my body in various ways... if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

[u/gonzo_au]

Mirror for anyone who lives in a third-world geoblocked country, like Australia...

http://teamcoco.com/video/jordan-schlansky-late

[u/mobashirahmed]

"i have worked for a living" - Gold for Conan

[u/MSQUIGGLE4U]

I love that whenever Conan deals with Schlanksy, he always has to stop and tell his audience; "this is a real person". HAhaha cracks me up every time. EDIT - Typo.

[u/[deleted]]

Haha, right at the end this little thing made the video for me. Conan seems like a fucking cool boss.