For the last year we've been torturing- we
mean, exploring the secrets of science using your favorite, and our most expendable, writer
in a quest to answer some of the most pressing questions of our age. Questions such as: what would happen if you
didn't shower for a month? What if you couldn't use your own bathroom
for a week? What is it like to be homeless for 72 hours? Well, the entire time we've been listening
to you, the fans, and now today we're presenting a very special Challenge episode, as we've
convinced your favorite guinea pig's girlfriend to join in on the fun! Stay tuned as we present our newest Challenge:
chained to my boyfriend for 72 hours! Day 1: Hello, I am “the girlfriend”. For almost a year now I've been forced to
stand by and often be the innocent bystander in one silly, unhygienic, or outright dangerous
challenge after another. Then out of the blue, he tells me that The
Infographics Show would like to know if I would be interested in taking on a challenge
myself. Well, here I am, and if you told me a year
ago I would be doing this I would've called you an idiot- right after calling him an idiot
first for doing this idiot job in the first place. I have had to sit by and watch him try to
eat the world's hottest pepper, which was really something considering his opinion of
spicy is to add extra salt to a dish. I painted his face up as he had to wear makeup
for several days straight, and ok that one was kind of funny. But I also had to sit home alone scared out
of my mind as he went homeless for three days straight in downtown Los Angeles while he
refused to use his cell phone to let me know he was ok. I told him a long time ago that he is an idiot
with an idiot job, but you know what, I saw that he genuinely kind of liked these challenges. He's always liked to push himself, it is one
of the things I love about him, and while I often wish that he would take one of the
many comfortable, easy writing jobs that have come across his path, even when he's miserable
because he can't use the bathroom at home for a week straight, it kind of makes him
happy to do these silly, idiotic things. And when you really, genuinely love someone,
their idiot things kind of become your idiot things, and for better or worse I love my
idiot more than anything in the world and so, here I am. I am always really supportive of his career,
and I try my best to drag him- typically under threats of violence- to networking events
he hates so he can expand his horizons and rub shoulders with influential people who
can see how talented he is. But while I love to watch some of the other
videos he writes for The Infographics Show- that's right, he does regular vids, try and
guess which ones are his- because they're typically funny and sarcastic, I never paid
any attention to these Challenges he undertakes. Probably because most of the time I'm the
unwitting victim who has to spend her day to day life with him doing something dumb
like not telling a lie for a week and getting into ideological debates with girl scouts
over exploitation outside of grocery stores. Yeah, thanks to that episode there are still
people we can no longer socialize with and stores I haven't visited in months. But then he showed me that people were really
getting into these episodes and the crazy things he did and well, he got sent to Hawaii
for a week all because you guys kept asking for it. Then not long after that the show asked me
to get into it, and... I guess I thought to myself that if I really
love my boyfriend then I kind of owed him this one, experiencing what it is like to
be him. So now I'm chained up to my idiot boyfriend
for three days. As I am writing this he is sitting next to
me with the same big, stupid grin on his face he always gets when he is about to do one
of the more reckless and/or dumb challenges. The premise is simple enough I guess. We are handcuffed together at the wrist with
a three-foot piece of chain, because trying to do this with regular handcuffs would have
been impossible. The chain should make things a little easier
I guess, and my real concern was private bathroom time. The chain is just long enough that he can
sit outside the door with it closed, because while we may have been living together for
a long time there are some secrets best kept, well, secret. I'll follow his format and update at the end
of each day, so I suppose that this is me signing off until tonight. End of Day 1: We have lived together for half
a decade now, so we are well past the fairy tale stage and have gotten into the nitty
gritty of living with another person. That means farts are a normal part of life
for us, but I had no idea just how many farts he has throughout the day! I thought at best he had maybe four or five,
two I'm around for and two or three more he let off when I am not around. I was very wrong. I lost track at around ten, and can someone
in the audience please explain to me why men find every single fart as funny as the one
before it?! Ok, before he marinated me in a cloud of farts,
we started out our day as usual. Luckily my show is on hiatus for a week so
I don't have to work, but I still have to stay in shape so that means a six am run. Most of the time he joins me anyways, even
if half of my morning workout is physically dragging him out of bed to do it, but now
chained up to me he has no choice. I know he hates running, but it is really
good for him, and despite how big an idiot he can be I want him to live as long as possible
so I make him do it. He is a lot slower than me though so trying
to keep pace with the chain was very annoying and difficult, let alone doing stretches or
any sort of exercise after. I felt really embarrassed in public attached
to him with a chain even though there were only a few people around this early in the
morning, and I guess I sort of understand a little bit of what he does and how difficult
it can be. We did not have much planned for today, and
honestly I really felt embarrassed about the chain so we did not do much today. Mostly just hung around the house and watched
terrible 80s and 90s movies together, anything with Van Damne and Steven Seagal in it. He always loved watching these movies and
I have to admit, it really grew on me too and now I'm a huge fan of anything super cheesy. Honestly, I knew the first time we spent an
entire day home alone doing nothing but watching terrible movies together that he was it, the
one, and I have been right ever since- for any ladies watching at home, you know you
found the one when you can spend all day doing your version of nothing together and loving
it. Today was the first bathroom test though,
and while he was totally fine with it- which should surprise nobody- I was kind of really
embarrassed even with him on the other side of the mostly closed door. He told me not to worry and so he put on ear
buds and blasted some Spice Girls and started singing it at the top of his lungs to convince
me couldn't hear anything. I told you he is an idiot... but I have to
admit, it was really sweet in his own, dumb way. That is all for today, I will talk to you
guys tomorrow! End of Day 2: We needed to go grocery shopping today, so
staying inside was not an option. I suggested we just order food in, but he
told me that the spirit of the challenge was to let people see what it would be like to
live a normal life, and not going to the grocery store would be cheating. Do you people see what I mean yet about him? He takes on these dumb challenges with so
much conviction. We got a lot of looks at the grocery store,
and yeah, it was definitely embarrassing. I wish the weather was cold, because then
we could have worn long jackets and hidden most of the chain. It is currently in the high nineties here
in Los Angeles though so no such luck. Other than the looks and stares, for one second
my often absent-minded boyfriend completely forgot we were chained together and realized
he was missing his favorite cereal, so he took off into another aisle. Luckily I was hanging on to the loaded shopping
cart, but that means that he got jerked backwards and almost busted his head on the floor. If people were staring before, now they were
outright gawking, and I am about ready to add this store to the growing list of places
I can no longer shop. When we got to the checkout counter my worst
fear came true though, one of our mutual acquaintances was there along with his girlfriend. Immediately they asked about the chain, and
the last thing I wanted to do was tell them that I was part of some internet challenge. Then suddenly though my boyfriend pipes up
and starts making up a nonsense story about this being part of some trendy new relationship
aid. Honestly, I have always admired his creativity
and I know he is really talented, but he wove an incredible masterful tale of BS that those
two swallowed hook, line and sinker. I know he very openly hates the hipster, art-snobby
culture of Los Angeles- his words, not mine- and he would never be caught dead in one of
the millions of trendy coffee houses in this city, but he is a master at pulling these
people's strings. He had them completely buying a story about
this chained together thing being some new form of relationship enhancing exercise, and
I have to admit it was the perfect sell for the more hipsterish, new-agey population of
LA. At the end of the conversation he had convinced
them to buy their own chain and try it out for themselves, so if being chained together
suddenly becomes a national relationship therapy tool, you know where it started. Even the cashier and the other people in line
were buying it, and I know he did all that because even though I am adjusting, it is
still kind of embarrassing for me to be doing this in public. Some girls get a knight in shining armor,
I get a master BS artist convincing people to chain themselves together so I don't feel
silly in public. I have to admit, I prefer the latter. Back at home we had more bathroom issues,
which meant he stood in the hallway, this time singing Backstreet Boys songs while I
did my business privately. He forgot we were chained together- again-
in the kitchen though when he got excited and remembered he had bought his favorite
cereal and wanted to fix himself a bowl. I am starting to see a pattern here, and somebody
should test Smacks to see if they include cocaine in the ingredients. End of Day 3: Today was the final day of this experiment,
and I am actually a little conflicted about it ending. I am really happy to no longer be chained
together, but even though it was really, extremely, incredibly inconvenient and sometimes outright
uncomfortable, it was also a little bit sweet being forced to be so close to him this whole
time. We woke up feeling pretty awful, yes we left
the chain on even at night and that means every time one of us tossed and turned the
other got jerked around. He has issues from when he was injured in
the service though so I know he really tried to be as still as possible, but after two
nights like this I knew he was really sore and messed up. I suggested we get massages, and I kind of
surprised myself- I think after yesterday's grocery store incident I am not as embarrassed
about being in public like this anymore. I thought the massage parlor would think we
were complete freaks and kick us out, but we went to a vietnamese place and turns out
they really did not care at all. After the massage he reminded me that today
was date night, but he offered for us to stay in if I wanted to. I reminded him that the rules of the challenge
were that we had to still live out or normal lives to get the full experience, and I can
tell it really made him kind of happy that I was getting into it as well. We went out to a restaurant and even though
the place was crowded, you know I kind of really started not caring anymore. In fact, it was kind of fun to be doing this
together, even if we were getting all sorts of stares and had to sit on same side of the
table. We went to the movie theater after and everything
was great- until I suddenly told him that I had to pee really, really bad right before
the movie started. His eyes went wide with horror and I saw him
slowly mouth out the word “no!”, and I really hate that I was a total girl about
it, but yes, I really had to pee really bad. Impossible to hold in. We went to the bathroom hoping that because
the movie was about to start it would be relatively empty, but it just so happens that another
movie had just let out and this happens to be one of the biggest theaters in the city,
so there were people going in and out constantly. I had hoped we could sneak in real quick and
shove him into a stall with me, but there was no way that was happening. I told him that we could just hurry home and
I would just hold it. Then he did something I can only describe
as typical him. He said, “NO, you've been wanting to watch
this movie so you're going to see it!”, then he took his shirt off, tied it around
his head so it blocked his eyes, and dragged me into the women's bathroom. Then he stood there at the entrance and loudly
said, “Ladies I am so sorry but I am handcuffed to my girlfriend and we don't have the key
and she really has to pee, I promise you I can't see anything.” The entire bathroom went dead silent, then
several girls started to laugh, some even applauded. Then... well... I did my business with him shoved up against
the door to a dirty stall as he loudly hummed a Spice Girls tune to himself. My boyfriend is an idiot, but sharing this
experience with him has made me realize how much I love him for it. Like I said in yesterday's entry, some people
get a knight in shining armor, but I got a guy that convinces people to handcuff themselves
together so I'm not embarrassed in public, and who marches into a women's bathroom with
his shirt tied around his head as a blindfold so that I can pee and enjoy a movie. All things considered, I will gladly put up
with more of these ridiculous challenges and choose my idiot over any knight in shining
armor. Just do not expect me to do many more of these
challenges. I think one weekend chained together was enough
for me. Got any ideas for challenges? Especially ones that don’t involve me? Let us know in the comments or email us! And as always if you enjoyed this video check
out one of the other crazy challenges and don't forget to Like, Share, and Subscribe
for more great content!
