Brother Proposed On Sister's Wedding - Worst Family Incident Gossip Stories - Askreddit Women

people who are currently sitting on the couch browsing read it instead of partaking in family gossip in the kitchen what's the juicy family drama this year about a month ago my sister had an outdoor wedding at the gorgeous hotel overlooking the coast the ceremony and reception themselves were in the lawn / garden that the hotel rented out specifically for such events but my fiance and I also had booked a room in the hotel for the night which itself was set a short distance apart from there my now fiancé 25 years old female and I 25 year old male are both very uncomfortable with large crowds so sometime into the wedding I'll let my sister know that we were a treating to the hotel for a short breather we had discovered a small Terrace in the hotel the previous day that had an amazing view of the sunset and we wanted to go there to have ten minutes to ourselves we are both huge romantics seriously we will make you retch and love the ocean and the sunset for our first date I borrowed the keys of my friend's apartment buildings rooftop and set up a picnic and a playlist with a sunset view literally every anniversary of ours has involved a private place to watch the sunset over the ocean the view from the terrace was absolutely spectacular and the moment was so perfect that I couldn't help myself it was completely spontaneous I didn't even have a ring I just got on one knee and asked her then and there to marry me and she said yes no one saw us the terrace was empty and the garden in which the reception was held wasn't in our field of view we were both buzzing with excitement but we both agreed to hold off telling anyone else because this was my sister's special day last night we had dinner with my family and my fiance and I broke the news to my family that we were engaged everyone was obviously delighted and asked us to narrate the story of how she proposed my sister was furious to find out I had proposed during her wedding she pulled me aside after dinner and completely blew up at me she accused me of trying to steal the attention from her wedding and I told her that we had intentionally kept the news to ourselves till now to avoid doing exact cleavers she said it didn't matter because now everyone would remember how wedding as the day I proposed anyway I honestly disagree because no one really witnessed my proposal so it wouldn't really be part of their wedding memories we didn't tell anyone we got engaged till now and I don't really feel that anyone will associate her wedding with our engagement at this point because by now it's been long enough that they should feel like two separate events my sister doesn't see it my way and has refused to speak to me since last night my mom is both a piece of work and a work in progress she's also one of those moms who believe that since I'm Facebook / Instagram friends with somebody that we are obviously friends in real life and keep up with each other all of the time she called me to tell me that a childhood friend of mine who I probably haven't spoken to in eight plus years no ill will between us we just lost touch when she went to a different high school and I went out of state for college is pregnant and about to move into a house with her husband great good for her I don't care but she had to call me to give me the great news because she knows the friend and I are so close she also dropped a line that said friend is pregnant because her husband's mother was messing around with their birth control and isn't that so funny I informed her that was not funny and she shrugged it off and said well at least they have a baby now I should note that my fiance and I plan to not have kids on top of this flat out not wanting them it would cost us a million dollars hyperbole to have a child because we are lesbians and that is expensive I'd rather have my Tesla than a child and my fiance and I have already spoken about adopting if we do end up wanting a child later this crush is my mom's heart but her baby rabies is not my problem and to be completely honest I don't give a damn astir whether or not she becomes a grandparent on the bright side our wedding planning is going well and she has toned down the nonsense for now edit I was able to get in touch with the friend today I found out that her mother-in-law made some weird comment to her husband after he announced the pregnancy to his mother - we after she found out she was pregnant and my friend did not know he was telling his mother about how her hard work paid off and after pressing for information mother-in-law revealed she messed with the birth control on purpose not okay after some thinking with her husband they are making a decision to abort as they'd like to have a baby on their terms if it ever comes to it they have not told mother-in-law yet I also suggested to my friend to speak to someone therapist counselor etc about this there are so many red flags and so many more that she revealed on the phone call yonkers and his pregnant again by a different baby daddy quit her job because it's too tiring hasn't raised her child at all and has left her pretty much to be cared for by my aunt and uncle who for some reason keep coddling my cousin and letting her do whatever she wants she is going to end up being a sponge off other people because everyone keeps letting her live that way I'm not judging her for having kids at that age there's not even sex education in rural Oklahoma it just makes me sad because she was really bright and vibrant when we were younger and is throwing her future prospects away she's definitely capable of holding a good job and being independent but probably won't see that potential realized because everyone is letting her be lazy and a leech also my grandma is mad at her because despite taking her in and treating her like her own grandchild they / we aren't related by blood step family stuff she ignores my grandma whenever she goes to visit during Christmas my boyfriend and me we were unreachable we decided we don't want to celebrate at home instead we joined our friends and rented a log cabin far away from our town I finally got a Christmas feeling it was snowing we were playing games and giving gifts and doing many other fun things Christmas was amazing for us and we had left our phones at home so that no one would bother us it was a holiday after all we had already congratulated everyone and no one should have a reason to contact us we asked unable to keep an eye on our house every now and then while we gone just in case someone mother-in-law shows up we returned home on December 28th and our phones were almost bursting from an answered calls and text messages we have both blocked mother-in-law's number this was another number but it was her my boyfriend had more than 100 unanswered calls on his phone my phone had a smaller number because obviously she hates me the texts were like where are you why aren't you answering is something wrong has that filthy gay taken you away are you alive and so on a neighbor also told us that while we were gone there was this one car that came very often stopped in front of our house and stayed there for hours so mother-in-law wasn't trying to get inside the house she probably realized that would mean a bunch of trouble for her but instead of celebrating Christmas like a normal person she came to spy on us however she did arrive later that day we were cooking dinner and suddenly we heard someone pounding on our door I opened and mother-in-law was there looking mad as the devil himself and was like what have you done to my son where is my son my boyfriend heard her yelling came out of the kitchen and asked her why she is here again when we told her numerous times we don't want to see her mother-in-law was already about to walk past me and my boyfriend was like did we say you can come in stay where you are this offended her a lot even though it shouldn't have she shouldn't expect him to run and greet her as he has demonstrated his attitude towards her a lot of times mother-in-law asked where were we and why didn't we answer our phones my boyfriend said we went to another country and got married we didn't of course we just celebrated Christmas with our friends before we went to the cabin we all agreed to leave electronic devices at home so that nothing would ruin the Christmas spirit and we could really focus on each other we only had one phone in case something goes wrong but from mother-in-law's point of view it was easy to believe because my boyfriend proposed to me this Christmas and his gift was two gold wedding bands one for him and one for me with an engraving of my name on his ring and his name on mine it was just symbolic of course we cannot get married legally but it was so nice so unexpected and made me very happy mother-in-law looked as if a huge pile of snow had fallen upon her or something she looked at our rings she looked at us and it felt as if she was considering ripping our heads off she started yelling in an inhumanly way honestly she was like oh my god what's going to happen to your soul now two men cannot get married it's an abomination it's like spitting in God's face God's anger will fall upon you now your life will be terrible Jesus will never forgive this to you you have glass find the meaning of marriage and so on she was livid really and her reaction was kind of amusing to look at because even if we were actually married there's nothing she can do about it she cannot take it away from us as much she'd like to no one can come and say I don't want these two people to be married divorce them just because I say so it's just not happening and then she looked at my boyfriend and said and you didn't even congratulate me on Christmas how could you forget your own mother you didn't give me a gift he was like you really think you deserve gifts I don't think so that made her even madder and she said now I'm going to the church talk to the priest and see what can be done about it there must be a way to save you you might need to come to the church and when I call you better answer me I just found out through my daughter's DNA test that my first cousin has a 26 year old son he was the product of a one-night stand and the mom didn't even know his name but thought it might be Alejandro the son contacted my daughter and said they were second cousins we told the son to take another DNA test that his likely biological grandmother has taken and let his bo dad know that way rather than us telling him my family is kind of touchy about things like that my cousin has no other kids and has never been married it should be interesting in between Christmas and New Year's my boyfriend and I got into a pretty big fight the basic gist of the it was that my boyfriend is ready for us to move in together and I don't feel ready we realized after this fight that we needed to take some time away from each other to figure out what we both want normally this would be something that I wouldn't tell my family about I would talk to my mom and maybe my sister a bit since they would be able to tell I'm upset but other than that it's no one's business but mine and my boyfriend's the problem this time was that Mike offered to have a New Year's Eve party at his house that all of my cousins were invited to I come from a very big family and my cousins are a big part of my social life I was still extremely upset from our fight when one of my cousins asked me details about New Year's Eve so I told her that I wasn't ready to talk but that we were taking a break from each other and that we would all have to make new plans I ended up mass texting the cousins that were coming and we made new plans since my boyfriend again I emphasized in the text that we were taking a break from each other and that I wasn't ready to talk about it fast forward Mike and I have been talking a lot lately and are really working a lot of things out my cousin's engagement party was last weekend which Mike did not come to but he met all of us out at a bar after the party that's when the issues started some of my cousins and my aunts all started freaking out at the bar asking what Mike was doing there I realized that somewhere it got lost in translation that we totally broke up I tried to explain that we are just taking a break but I guess some people in my family don't believe in breaks background I have two children that my partner and I adopted out of foster care my partner and I are both white and our kids are clearly mixed the kids know that they are adopted from foster care but we don't openly share that with people because our oldest is insecure about being our real son still when I say we don't openly share I mean we don't volunteer the info and less someone asks and we generally assume that people can figure it out on their own I started volunteering for my kids school events and quickly got absorbed into the group of parent tears we had a group text to discuss the events we were planning as well as some dinners and such we had together my entire family came to a fundraiser and it was the first time my partner had met all the other volunteers I thought it seemed fine I did notice more than one person asking how long we'd been married and how old our kids are but those seemed more or less innocuous afterwards I got a text from one of the fathers that was clearly meant to be sent to another group text it said we can all agree that my kids aren't her husband's right do you think he's just ignoring that they're black I found it incredibly rude that they were gossiping about me like that so I responded geez I certainly hope they aren't his biological kids I didn't include any other context I was angry and kind of just wanted to make them aware that I could see what they were saying it kicked up quite a crapstorm though no one texted back in the group message but multiple people sent screenshots of the message to my partner he ended up being the one to say the kids were adopted and I do feel bad that I put that burden on him by not clarifying he says he didn't mind though the president of the PTA however basically kicked me out of the volunteering positions I held he said I intentionally caused chaos by acting in a chili frankly I didn't really want to work with those people anymore anyway but I do feel guilty for not being more mature about it and lashing out in anger so there isn't much to it and I'm generally looking for a consensus here I come from a difficult home scrapped and saved built my own life now working and in graduate school partner comes from a cushy family lots of love with our SAHM we are both 25 and have been together three years mother-in-law is a perfectly kind person very generous very caring of her kids mother-in-law also has no job and refuses to get one further her education anything like that so she has a lot of time on her hands and gets into all the family gossip and drama she gets so involved in this that we get dragged into it and end up listening for hours on end about the latest drama father-in-law Works's but often is hoping to retire by 70 brother-in-law is still living at home and mooching off parents again a very nice person but basically everyone is living off of father-in-law who is the only drama-free easygoing person in the bunch to be honest I love my partner don't love the family there's been many times when mother-in-law gets in a mood when we get in the car to go home and I very often can't stay along because I support us both financially I stopped attending family events except Christmas because it gives me too much anxiety mother-in-law often states she sees me as a daughter and she's very kind to me that I have no interest in joining this dynamic I keep my distance and I like my space when things get too emotional with her I honestly had started to shrug it off because she's always upset over something small and it makes my partner upset too as he always tries to make her feel better we live in a different state now and they are visiting this weekend I enjoy their company to an extent but would never open up my life to her at any vulnerable way I just don't one slash need a mom especially not with the added drama we've been married for eight years now after getting married relatively young we both decided to step back and take some time apart for a number of reasons with the idea of reassessing things after the separation I think we both were open to idea of giving it another shot after what we intended to be a four-month separation with all this in mind I communicated ahead of time that it was important to me that we not tell our families none of whom live anywhere near us about the separation to me it meant that if we did decide to stay together we could choose that in a seamless way I remember that we agreed at the time on this and also agreed that she should still be able to confide in her close friends about it so that she would have a support system I just found out that my wife told all of her siblings and her parents within the first month of the separation in addition to my siblings and knowing my family I'm sure everyone in my extended family has been made aware by now this feels like a major breach of trust to me I explained that feeling to my wife and her response was that she didn't remember agreeing not to tell family she seems to think we never discussed it at all I really bristle at the idea of being the subject of family gossip and I feel anxious at the thought of the family forever looking back at the time that my wife and I were separated assuming we do still try to make it work what's more I feel like I can't rely on her to do or even remember things we've agreed on I just returned from Thanksgiving with my mom's family and I'm starting to think that my mom makes disparaging comments about me to her family essentially every year I travel to one of their houses and celebrate the holiday with my immediate family parents and brother my mom's two sisters and their immediate families and my mum's parents I've always been a bit different from the rest of my family nothing crazy I was just a weird kid in middle school I'm also pretty quiet which probably doesn't help much I feel like I get ignored / overridden during pretty much any interaction I'd have with them for example there were sixteen of us and three cars so some coordination was required when the time came to go somewhere don't remember where but it was in town one of my uncle's announced that I specifically could not drive his rental car this might sound like not such a big deal but I'm the second oldest of that youngest generation so I was one of four or five eligible drivers due to a combination of age and a drinking within the group when I got in the front seat of my grandma's car she told me to go to a different car because my brother's girlfriend was going to sit up front with her another time my uncle was going to pick up lunch and sent his daughter around asking what people want and texting it to him my mom and I got very similar things and when he got back with the food I accidentally took my mom's and ate it before she got back upon hearing this my uncle's the one who got the food essentially cornered me twice to show me his phone and explain why I was wrong I don't even know how he found out it happened I had a five-word conversation with my mom explaining the switch and she didn't care I wrote it off as he's always pretty combative but when I thought about it more I realized I've never seen him get that way with anybody else this has happened many times before but I won't get into that here I could go on with more examples but you probably get the point I feel like when I talk to members of my mom's family they take a more authoritative tone maybe I'm reading into it too much I can't tell if I'm imagining things because all the evidence I have are these kinds of essentially microaggressions and I'm pretty close to my mom when it's just me immediate family I'm also starting to think that me getting along better with my dad's family and the parts of my mom's family she doesn't talk to very much might not be a coincidence [Music] [Music]

Channel: ASK GURU

Views: 102,782

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Keywords: askreddit, r/askreddit, askreddit stories, askreddit women, askwomen, askreddit girls, reddit girls, reddit women, askreddit wedding, askreddit proposal, askreddit dating, askreddit engagement, askreddit incident, askreddit family, askreddit gossip, askreddit drama, proposed on a wedding

Id: OYrskyskxHY

Length: 21min 1sec (1261 seconds)

Published: Mon Dec 23 2019