Better Late Than Never? | Britain's Oldest Mums and Dads (Parenting Documentary) | Real Stories |

[Music] Britain is becoming a nation of much older parents when people think my dad is drunk I mean dad it doesn't bother me the number of British women giving birth in their 40s and 50s has more than doubled in the last ten years one minute I was told I was on the menopause in the next minute I found I was pregnant I'd have another one next week the number of children born to fathers in their fifties and sixties has also doubled in the last decade is right dad I have to be independent because just in case mother and dad die it's my life and I can give my children a good life at the moment hopefully for a long time to come Darren mins is 46 today and she'll soon be celebrating the birth of her third child oh my goodness only three to fifty it will be her partner Dave's first baby he's 48 49 scoop not most I think I've seen you people have got age on the mind age on the brain Darrin and Dave met nearly four years ago I live in quite a country area and you don't tend to meet a lot of females really at my age of 48 hours before deny when the baby's born you tend to thing you passed it I didn't ever think I'd actually do think I have another relationship to be honest but Darrin sorted that didn't it my love Darrin is now seven and a half months pregnant I need to know if you want to know the sex of your baby before we start I already know no synthesis oh okay so I know it's a boy and he's hairy but the pregnancy wasn't planned I went to the doctor and asked for some contraceptive pills and he said no you're not having any year over 45 and he did these blood tests for me at home and said no you're menopausal very very unlikely or fall pregnant so he says and because of your age and everything else I'm not giving you anything so he said you'll be fine and of course it was about eight months later and I did a pregnancy test and it was positive I took five tests and I just thought no it's hormonal they'll be something it's not right even when I went for the 10-week scan I thought no it'll be a cyst or something it won't really be a baby in there it's been difficult to come to terms with have to say how old are you other children were 17 nearly 17 and 15 and alone are they excited that you're pregnant and the older ones really struggling to come to terms with it to be honest it is difficult for them but the younger one she's just absolutely ecstatic I was really chuffed and I've always wanted a little brother so I was I was really happy about it and I was just like cool okay I was absolutely devastated to be true for two and a half weeks and it's taken me ages to come to terms with having a little brother [Music] Winston Churchill today but being pregnant at the age of 46 has proved more difficult for Darren I don't remember feeling this tired with the others and I don't remember feeling is exhausted at 30 odd weeks as I do now I mean even just walking up the street seems an efforts at the minute I still feel young but my body is telling me different and I actually I've suffered quite a bit this pregnancy it's been a bit of a shock really and I've I have been worried about how my feelings were gonna be towards it really this doesn't got my big nose he's got nice looking big nose but this scan today I've I've had feelings that I didn't think I'd have and then motherly instincts are coming through and I think your age you are slightly going against nature really good you know when they take nature tells you when you're not when you're not when you're past it I mean if you were past it as you were told you would be pregnant nature's told me cuz you're pregnant and why would you not need to tell me could you pregnant it's fine but what if nature tells you you are too old to get pregnant I like to be a mom at 51 it's a woman of 51 pregnant with test-tube baby tell me yesterday how she lied about her age to receive fertility dream pauline lion became Britain's oldest mother when she gave birth to her daughter Lauren 11 years ago there we are Cheryl I see front page of the mirror today I felt so embarrassed because I didn't think it was gonna come out like that okay all that lived in there and four years later at nearly 56 Pauline got more headlines when their second child Brodie was born kept the scrapbooks in that cell when they get older you know they can up back know what happened here I brought in the been in the same decision Pauline is now 62 and her husband David is 61 while most people their age are looking forward to retirement they're getting ready for the school run David of the oldest parents dance school people know where their mums and dads so some of the children you know might say yeah Lana is that your granny and granddad you know and she just told him so no that's my mum and dad yeah and they just seemed very accepting both Pauline and David have grown up children from their first marriages well my first marriage broke up when my daughter was sick so you know if we'd have been together obviously we'd have gone on I have no children but when I went to be and I'd always wanted more children anyhow when we first met we talked about having baby between us right in the beginning um me now we got grown-up children don't mean we love them any less we just wanted one between us to seal a marriage kind of thing but I wouldn't I wouldn't have set thought myself at that stage in my life having any more children but once I met Pauline it just felt right by that time Pauline was 47 we tried to have natural conception but it never works huh it was just one of those things nobody knew why we didn't know why they don't test son man David David sperm was alright but they found out that I'd used up worn the eggs so could something so the only thing was egg donation IVF treatment the hospital had an upper age limit of 15 and crucially a three year waiting list at 47 Pauline would have run out of time so she lied changing her date of birth so that she appeared to be 45 type person to lie any rate so we didn't like doing it but we had to know if not we wouldn't need to got one attempt to have a baby you know when you're really desperate you just do anything yeah they were offered treatment and on the third attempt when Pauline was nearly 52 Lauren was born by caesarean section when it's born you just you know look at it in the carton that in the hospital just can't believe that let's come out here you told me going to think mark was really with everything you know in the right place just a minor cut you know don't take your eyes off on first boob - damn listen to him breathing and that noise as a mate brilliant fertility treatment had so far cost them 7,500 pounds but Pauline and David soon decided to begin a second course of IVF I'm just desperate for another baby they feel you'd do anything you know at the time to get one money was running out so they remortgaged their house and approached another clinic willing to treat Pauline at the age of 55 we decided we'd only go to the street ring constantly yeah we know it's gonna cost us letting our thousand pound for this restreamers okay we borrowed the money again it was third time lucky when it was on the last we were virtually broke you know we were virtually broke won't we Brody was born in March 1999 one month short of Pauline's 56th birthday to get one of each not really Brody's now six Lauren is 11 all my friends understand that they don't make any jokes about it that were parents were old there sometimes I don't really like it because they call room Nonie some people call nannying granddad's but they're not saying but sometimes it's alright my dad looks like granddad he isn't is my dad my mum looks like we're are nice but well age difference when Brody is 20 I should be 75 and pulling loose MDC we might live - they're in their early 20s but who's to say that a younger couple can't go out so I can get not my ambition is life is to make sure that both of my hopefully happily married settle down before I pop the clocks whether that will be no I have to be independent because just in case mother and a dad died and and then knee abrasion every shot look after her so we have to stop being dependent and take care of ourselves but for Pauline even at the age of 62 you're never too old for more children like Fiona still there I'd have another one next week you can't it's just something you can't explain you know just that long and I say every day even know if I talk but I'm gonna get emotional but you know it's just the way it is I can't help how I feel [Music] Bob Salisbury became one of Britain's oldest dads when his son Robert was born 12 years ago bob is 84 the age cap doesn't matter we love Roberts and we love each other I think that's all that counts Bob's wife Shirley has been caring for him since he had a stroke early in their relationship they met when bob was 71 and Shirley was nearly 40 they'd only been together for a few months when Shirley found she was pregnant with her first child he was worried about me because I was drinking no lots of fun Paul it's I mainly lemonade and they said go find out what's wrong so to please him I want to find out and they announced that I was pregnant that wasn't an April and Robert was born into me it was a shock I'm a surprise really to find out that I was pregnant it just changed the whole thing been such a perilous we weren't expecting it was a lovely surprise in the end at the age of 71 Bob was a first-time father he still is a mouth Lestat he was seven when the baby was born that's it and he still is true that choking the notion of thunder he was so proud of him when he was a baby Bob helping with the feed in them a changing of the nappy taking him out for walks he uh threatened blood what he's trying to say is that he was happy he wasn't expecting to become a dad and it's as he said it's his own flesh and blood three years later Bob and Shirley got married little Robert was their page boy I think he always wanted to child we were both a bit younger we would only met when we would have liked more children but this one has made us happy make changed our lives completely whose is aware that is that's all day well I don't think that makes any difference to him when people think my dad is my granddad it doesn't bother me I think it's important that my parents were for me even though my older and you know yeah it does matter how old the hour I still with me I think my parents are different now as in they're not a strict I can get away with murder so I leave you here for a minute while I just pops families over the road sure whatever [Music] you just woke up doing sack [Music] how long does it take to buy a chicken how long does it take you're buying that's caring bonus bowls oh but if you want to spend so much time in the budgets I won't have time to pick a song get Oh whoopsie Rock now games oh you do do you yes and if you would hold up I will have the time to choose them out Kenny I was an early Christmas yeah it's been a good boy still doesn't mean look at me I saw my daughter with boiling they see something I think it's just garbage maybe you're the parent stone but that's an old affair and I think they should have walked on when I spoil them sometimes on a Friday night or weekend deal of a pizza is they won't come out the pizza mouthing yes [Music] special boy thank you deserves the best [Music] Darren mins is now 32 weeks pregnant and it's her last day at work as a nursing assistant her most at ease I'm very sad to be leaving they've been absolutely wonderful here so supportive and it is going to be quite hard really but I will keep coming back in and popping in to see them I am on my feet all day and it is quite hectic at times and you don't get to sit down much drink hot chocolate oh you want one sugar in yours don't ya Darrin's partner Dave is a farmer at the moment they live apart she lives in walls fall flat above the local shop I live here obviously the ideal situation would be for us to be together we'd like to build a house but with farming and incomes of the aisle at the moment it's gonna be very difficult it'll be far from ideal because I do believe that children need both parents and I will be there as much as I can what I was young I used to think yourself dot I like have a son but I mean when you get to my age you just don't I mean it don't think about really yeah you tend to think the chance is gone I don't know whether how I'll ever want a farm but if he does I'll be well thank you but you get her for it but if not well you probably have more sense and do something else forget more sense and work by Evie [Music] well you're right old woman my darling well I'm an old man I've been feeling absolutely awful I've had really bad morning sickness this time and I've struggled an awful lot but I don't know whether that's age-related or whether it's because I've had a third child and also I'm carrying a boy and everybody says you carry differently with different children and I've had two girls so I don't know but I've I have to say I don't want to admit it but I have to say I've struggled an awful lot with this pregnancy when I found out I was pregnant there was nothing positive to say about being an older man and every time you saw anything or you listen to the radio what it was all negative thoughts and the first was you're prone to having twins and then you're prone to Down syndrome and then you're prone that just loads wasn't there need prone to this Sutton the other I did have worries that you know when other people go to pick their kids up they're going to be in their 20s they've all probably got hair and I'm gonna be a fifty he's probably puffing and panting with me puffer because I've got a cellphone as well I was too old when he Dave's really really excited he's he's getting to the stage he can't wait and I'm getting more and more anxious and nervous about that not necessary de bout the birth or anything it's just going back to scratch looking after babies again after my - and now fully grown I'm hoping it's not a psychological thing because he you know obviously he's not he wasn't planned but he's starting to get painful enough to say I just hope it doesn't last now until he's born because four weeks five weeks of this I don't think I'm gonna be to impress can you find the pro forma through its pay 48 year-old Faye Hudson's pregnancy was what she'd hoped and planned for okay thanks bye but what happened next wasn't what she expected it's also incredible what's happened this year I just don't you know I can't sort of piece it together I can't really believe it Faye and her husband Paul have been together for 24 years and they'd been trying for a baby for 10 but just three months after Faye finally conceived they split up they run their own computer business so although they're separated they still see each other every day if it wasn't for Faye the way she looks at things and deals with things then it would I'm sure the story would be very much different for me yeah because not everybody this is understanding this fight ever since they met making a success of their company has been the most important thing in their marriage the business just takes 24 hours you've got to be at it constantly you're supervising staff you're looking at components toward you're working on accounts your mind is constantly thinking about the business and what you actually need to do instead of thinking about anything else but slowly and gradually dawns on you until you're about 40 and then you realize there is definitely something missing in my life I just didn't want to sort of get to 50 and then look to 65 retirement and feel that there was that that really big chunk missing out of my life so when Faye hit 45 and still wasn't pregnant she and Paul decided to try IVF I put the whole emphasis on what it really said work and this was really you know it was really gonna work only to find that you know we have a call to say look I'm sorry but it's not worked and and for me that sort of sent me a little bit down because you don't really I shouldn't have done that but I allowed myself to to become emotionally open and I think man I've got to be aware that don't go down that route try to if it works it works like it's great if it doesn't it doesn't but don't put the whole emphasis on you really want it to work if because when it fails it occurs [Music] when the first cycle failed Fay was eager to try again but Paul was reluctant and when Fay became pregnant on the second attempt Paul walked out I think face found it difficult although she's a very strong person which I'm really amazed by the strength of character to be honest yeah yeah it's been very difficult to come in to the office without me being upset but having a baby is so wonderful that it oversees everything else so I can't really look at the negative all right so I'll see you tomorrow then good night Paul has started a new relationship and moved into a flat Fay has stayed in the home they once shared initially to start with I felt absolutely totally alone the babies kept me focused from day to day and it's actually it's really being a companion and it's kept me going I believe that it would have been a totally different situation if I'd have got pregnant younger because I think it's the issue of the donor egg that that's come more or less between us like so many older women going for IVF Fay was advised to use donated eggs instead of her own you're playing with nature and it doesn't feel sometimes if it's natural you're afraid in a way that people aren't going to love the child because of that reason it's no issue to me whatsoever that it's a donor it makes absolutely no difference it to me it's actually a child a baby it's it's got a soul and that soul could have been the same soul but whether it's my egg or snot anyone else is out a newborn baby is a handful for any mother but it's even harder when you've just had twins and you're 52 but surely Binns takes it all in her stride max winds are eight weeks old I've got three children that are 25 20 and 18 can't believe that I'm doing it again and as well as caring for her own children Shirley also helps to look after her grandson Kieran who's three right off to move through then you got to be goodbye today I never thought that I would have children at this age after I've already had a grandson most of my friends become completely mad [Music] and like many women her age Shirley's also got an elderly parent to look out for so next on the list a trip to see her dad [Music] how many times have you been in and out today I feel as if I've just got as much energy as I had when I was 27 when I have my first [Music] [Music] I've always had a lot of energy I've always done a lot of stuff play badminton I go to the gym we'd go windsurfing there's not a lot that we don't do Shirley's partner Carl is 10 years younger than her we've been together 11 12 years I've lived with Carl for 10 years now and we met playing badminton it's a local badminton club and we were both having difficulties with our marriage marriages yeah we were real good friends mmm it's with each other about things and things became more difficult between my family's just went on from there soon they were living together and wanting children of their own I can remember sitting at the breakfast table one day and Carr third I think it's about time we came half the time you came off the pill now and I said okay and I stopped taking it that day and just hoped from then on what things would happen was quite exciting but after four years Shirley still wasn't pregnant then last year when I was 50 we started looking on the internet for clinics that would take older older women and we found the one at Darlington I wasn't very optimistic that it would work because so many people try so many times and I don't think that I would have wanted to try more than once but surely never had to try again she got pregnant the first time we went to the scan fortnight later and immediately as soon as the picture came up I could see there was something there it was a like a little doll fun we've got the pictures and I could see there was something there and she said so as soon as we saw it she said oh yes those are definitely a baby there and I said oh one or two and she does I'll have a look and there's another one all the way how we were tweets yeah twits they really are lovely babies and they're so different not like yeah there are different personalities it's what they're wonderful [Music] we have our own children I have math ray and cow-house Rachel and it was just so nice to have something that was just ours for us of our own you know rather than saying well this is my stepdaughter this is my stepson you know this is my son our relationship is very strong and the ultimate was to have the children it's been so good doesn't that yeah we had three kids and my brother's 24 nearly 25 so it's a bit of an age difference when they told me first to act I'm quite often promising snoozing on the settee but even though if the children keep me up 3/4 of the night I'm still alright the next morning and the next afternoon I can understand that people would think that would being selfish and that when our children are 18 we might not be around or I might not be around cuz I'll be 69 we haven't got them so that we can put them on shore and so just like buying something and something nice new towels it's it's all about giving it's not about the selfish if we were doing it we were doing it for ourselves we wouldn't do it we would save the morning we would save the time and we would do what we want to do there's nothing selfish about it just because mum is not as young doesn't mean to say that she can't do what what other mommies do the worst scenario would be if they were embarrassed about it and obviously you don't want them to be embarrassed about was being a bit over the deal I can give my children a good life hopefully for a long time to come and I hope that my children appreciate that it doesn't matter how old I am I don't want them to be judgmental of my age or anybody else's [Music] Bob and Shirley are fulfilling a lifelong dream what is that I just can't believe this it's just lovely - in Blackpool I never thought we'd see this day but it's a day at wish for our with that you know for the last 12 years not very often I get to go out with my mum dad - any children I've got a wonderful search for hospitals I'm just proud to hold what about yourself boom but not scary one it's not like the Twitter this is a baby bird I don't usually go on right please remain seated until you are ready to go and what if a bug comes over where your few options yeah [Music] to [Music] No [Music] gunfire healthy living on [Music] council is just a beautiful day surely did say aloha to eternal paradise people might think there's an age problem but I don't I say as long as you're happy the age difference doesn't matter [Music] his life is more complete now he has got child to carry on the name of souls read [Music] Faye is now nearly seven months pregnant she and Paul are still living apart but Paul says he's ready to get more involved with face pregnancy today they're attending their first childbirth class together there's going to be this very small human being that needs all your love and attention 24 hours a day and you've not had that for 24 years well longer because I'm 48 so it's you get rather selfish to be honest I need to read the manual I couldn't just abandon Faye I really didn't need to to support her as much as I could because I knew that if I didn't do that the alternatives was for Fay probably to say well I'm sorry but you don't wanna be able to see the child which was not what I want I mean I don't want that at all I mean I want to be as close you know no matter what happens as close to possibly count to it yeah it's taken a while but Paul's starting to accept phase decision to get pregnant using a younger woman's egg there was a stage where I didn't actually feel that a donor egg seemed a bit strange but then you know I've sort of changed my view on that because it's like almost suffered for a man in any case it's difficult to relate to sure them because if you're not had children in your life anyway that in itself is difficult to relate to [Music] having the scam today will be the closest that we will get before the baby's born I feel close to it now but to actually see it in the full day is going to be absolutely fantastic they always say that the child can either make or break a relationship and I'm sure that that could be the case without the effort does put obviously extra added issues in there as well I know that he was having problems with it and I know it was a extremely stressful for him I did try to support him I did try to understand what he was going through but it's really really hard I'm just going to stay absolutely focused on I'm having the baby nothing that has gone before it or will go after it is going to get in the way or deter me from looking after it I feel absolutely a different woman a different person and it's a different life and I feel totally rejuvenated because of it [Music] 46 year-old Darrin mins is in labor [Music] so far it's lasted 31 hours and it's proving far harder than she remembers [Music] [Music] Dave's been at her side throughout [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] Oh beautiful after 32 hours of labor Harry Charles Parham or Jones is born Darrin is lucky for most women in their mid-forties getting pregnant naturally is rare only one in 20 will be successful without fertility treatment 45 year old Andrea Kenny's been trying to have a baby for the past three years I hadn't really thought about having a child I was trying the previous relationship and it didn't really work then either Andrea and her husband Lee have opted for intrauterine insemination or IUI treatment you're using your own eggs and they're not extracted from your body or anything what happens is they're just prepared with injections of hormones into your leg you're given another drug to release an egg and then the man's sperm is extracted and washed and then they pick the best ones and they put them in at just the right time and then they let nature do its own thing hopefully I've had one treatment which unfortunately didn't work so again for a second time now today Andrea is having a scan to find out when she'll be ready for insemination I've still to tell some family members simply because I'm worried that people be judgmental and think forty-fives to old to be having a baby I keep swinging from one minute I feel really hopeful and excited another minute I feel really depressed no it's not gonna happen so it is a real roller coaster oh it must be saying doesn't work for me I don't know she's gonna carry on going see what else [Music] just sort of folklore not at all the scan shows Andrea's eggs aren't ready yet but will be soon Friday okay we're in our second cycle of treatment now and it didn't work the first time around and that was willing white why it wouldn't have worked is it just one of those things it is just one of those things because unfortunately as you know the success rates probably only 10 to 15 percent per cycle so even if everything goes really well there's no guarantee of success unfortunately when they first shave me and I went oh my god at that needle and they said no that's just the drawing up needle the actual needles much thinner hey if I'm up if I have trouble getting the other needle on will you help me please okay to find a nice pink bit as part of the treatment andrea has to give herself a hormone injection every night to boost her fertility three four five six seven eight nine ten after a week of scans and hormone injections andrea is ready for her second insemination treatment today's the big day and when I find a part of my treatment so I had my final injection 35 hours ago and Lee will have been in about an hour and a half ago to provide a sample she's in the lab at the moment being prepared and then I will wait him to go for my treatment in a few minutes time but didn't work last time but they say if it's going to work it works in the first or second time so yeah fingers crossed the work this time I want to child relate because it's the first person afternoon that I want to be the father of my child it's one thing for a woman to have the instinct to have a child but I really want to child with Lee and they seem to be any way that we can achieve that really I don't think people do realize that they're more likely to fail than succeed I think it's the same with all others if there's a chance there and hope we all think we're going to be the one that it's going to be successful for I don't think people realize the kind of stress he go through and the emotions nowadays in video tool especially people that can conceive naturally them no idea [Music] [Music] it's just over a month until Faye Hudson's baby is due you I'm 35 weeks now and I'm getting very excited yeah well five weeks to go yeah I just can't wait really Faye and Paul are still living apart it's my last chapter you feel something's about to happen it really has seemed you know a long time really particularly in view of the fact with the RBF and that took a couple of years and so it's like something really is gonna happen oh yes bit strange really difficult to eye supporting two words I suppose I think Paul's extremely nervous about the birth I think it has been right from the start it's sort of being a bit of a problem to him but now I think is yes I believe it's coping with it anyway yeah I think you'll have to ask him about that I think any one of this said they weren't nervous I mean you'd you start ice as simple as that I have overall emotionally being really really good but at times I can have a day where I can feel quite weepy but I've been very Placid and normally when in normal situation I can be slightly more feisty then I have been so it's calm me down quite a lot I think having this baby five weeks later and phase due date has arrived but her baby hasn't because of phase age and because it's her first baby the Midwife has decided that PHA must go into hospital to be induced Neverland and you just don't know what's going to happen 8:30 should be induced it can take up to about six hours when I put the pessary I'll keep my fingers crossed hopefully at work and we've got a little baby at the end of it but after three attempts at inducing her phase no nearer to going into full labor despite their differences Paul has stayed by her side and he's keeping a video diary [Music] I'm gonna try another sway starts again tomorrow [Music] thanks for today anyway please your being with my but the next day face still not in labor because of our age they've got to make a decision which is really for the health of both you know fam on the baby so if nothing happens today and the chances are that it will be then sort of a caesarean section Faye finally has a caesarean and baby Daniel is born just just really just takes your breath away you can't fire words to actually explain what you've witnessed a bit we're doing welcome today Daniel John read range Geoffrey when they were called the knife okay now go throught again Fay and Paul are still living apart and Paul is in a new relationship but they say they'll try and bring Daniel up together it's been a long road to motherhood for Fay for Andrea the journey is only just beginning she'll soon find out whether the insemination has worked I'm still waiting on tenterhooks but no news is good news every day that goes by he's a bonus really I'm just trying not to get too hopeful last week I was reading a bit weep he don't know whether it's these hormone injections I've had but I'm all right this week she's been on edge a couple of times indecisive forgetful I'll put something that should be in the fridge in the oven or vice versa so don't know the backings upside of pregnant women get and I do say that it feels as though you periods about to start and it's kind of felt like that so I really don't know it's hard to wait and see they've been told not to get their hopes up but it's hard not to this will be your bedroom a lot work to do on it we shouldn't take too long it's mainly about you we should know within the next three or four three sails back we should know by Monday or Tuesday hopefully one way or the other a few days later and it's bad news Andrea isn't pregnant for me I feel like my body's let me down it's been annoying at them and we both feel that at the moment that everywhere we turn on the telly on the radio everybody's talking about babies I think it's good when you become a bit obsessed with us my thing he seemed to notice it everywhere I don't think about every talk about a sign yeah people were chatting about the kids what have you you think I do wasn't the word I feel that I'm not quite complete as a woman that it's kind of it's it's your little reason for being here in a way I know there's other things to enjoy in life but I think we're other women that have had children easily can be blasé about to get on with other aspects of your life but for me it's at the moment it's the being on Endor and I feel like I'm not a complete woman not fulfilled my purpose in life as it were [Music] [Applause] Jane dude me always thought she wasn't cut out for motherhood but she had a change of heart and circumstances and now she's the mother of four I'm 58 today actually so I'm an older mum but I'm a single mum I've got four beautiful children got a little girl she's 11 Annie three gorgeous boys Terry Jack and Ian and they're 12 13 and 15 Jane never planned to have children she wanted to be independent and love to travel but when her mother Marjorie became ill with Alzheimer's Jane had to give up her job to care for her I said lots of time to think looking after my mum and I became the mother figure and I think then you know I was thinking that I wanted to do something with children and particularly special needs children because there's such just such fun and you know and you know I've just always been drawn towards them so when her mother died Jane applied to become a foster carer at the age of 48 the loss of mine were special-needs children that were with her birth parents anyway and they just needed a little time to recharge their batteries you know late I would have two children one day a week or something like that so that birth parents could spend some time with the other siblings or get a little bit of rest or something so so you know always in the back of your mind you knew that they weren't yours I mean you would love them but they weren't going to be yours and more mine was short term until Annie came and that was different Annie was born with a rare congenital condition called Edwards syndrome and wasn't expected to live longer than a few weeks her birth mother who already had seven children had said she couldn't cope and wouldn't take her home it was on a Friday I got a phone call from my support worker saying there was a baby she was four weeks old and she was in the Children's Hospital and she's not expected to live so they really wanted her out of the hospital in a family environment you know for her to be cared for until she died really by the time Jane got to see the baby Annie had been rejected three times first by her birth mother and then by two other foster carers who couldn't provide the amount of care she needed and decided to have her straight away and I went up there and bought a home Annie had two holes in her heart a curved spine and chronic respiratory failure but she lived she's now eleven and one of the country's oldest survivors of Edwards syndrome they said that she would have three months to year to live they basically say the children are incompatible with life she's got all sorts of problems I mean she can't talk in in the real sense although she makes us understand beautifully you go out with your boys yes yes you just see when she's happy she just smiles you know so she makes us understand and he's a bit of a miracle because she shouldn't be here and she is we all know how precious life is in in our house and that's not a bad thing to know have you know how precious things are because we still got Annie when Jane brought Annie home she was already fostering two brothers Terry and Ian I used to have them for respite care they were part of a much larger family the boys had a younger brother Jack who was being fostered by another family we used to meet Jack at parties because I used to take Terry and Ian would go to a lot of birthday parties and I started taking Jack then as well he was just so cute and he used to look up at me he was just a lovely little boy and he had little National Health classes on he used to just look up at me and just slip his little hand into my hand and I got shocked but then Jane heard that all three boys were going to be adopted and would probably have to be split up I did feel very maternal towards them even though I was just a respite Cara I wanted to be their mum you know which was quite surprising quite surprising it nicely nurture it it nicely it is a big undertaking to adopt Ian and Jack have special needs I have severe learning difficulties Terry goes to mainstream school they are just the kindest nicest human beings that you would find anywhere they were they're just such lovely kids you know they got good hearts and they're funny they're funny they're just very gorgeous children and mine [Music] know what the way [Music] being a mum is the very best thing in the world it is the best thing in the world you think that you're going to give to them but you don't realize it's a two-way street and they're always giving to you all the time you know well I can say there's nothing better there is nothing better I thought they needed me I think actually we needed each other life is a lot of fun it is also fun but it's also hard work it's just that even at 58 Jane makes it look easy like driving her family from Sussex to Scotland for a holiday along with her sister and her foster children it is more difficult because I vanish medical needs to go away on holiday because we have to make sure that we've got plenty of oxygen cylinders to travel with we've got 20 up with us which is quite a lot and then we have to get a loader to go home again we have to set an ease the oxygen machine with us because we have to have less at night all her medication you know we have to have just everything it's not like an ordinary family where you can then always forgotten something but it doesn't matter all on this stuff we do have to have so you know that is a big part of our planning after 13 hours on the road with several stops to change Annie's oxygen tank they're only halfway there I don't know how to offer it the lights so I'm going to leave them because I'll come back out anyway to sort out the car get the washing sorted sort out the new oxygens and when the empties just stuck those bits up and that'd be easier in the morning which is that any other family if we arrange it properly is only watching we're here we're here boys oh here we go [Music] came up fast multiplex random - this is normal when we go away we have to move the furniture around to make it suit us didn't we and then make this longer here move the drawers around here to put all her medicines and bits and I have a torch them for changing her nappy and then I you know on the rare occasion that she'll just have one halfway change and go back to sleep I don't put all the lights on and I'm just sorted all that out so that it works grass for the oxygen and everything and make it me have to have our comforts don't we are me no oh no we all team enter tube today [Music] every day has to be the best that it can be mummy what done altered it again you want to do it again yeah because you know we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow or next week or whenever [Music] and so every day is important and we should all do that it shouldn't just be that Annie's may just think like that because no one knows what tomorrow will bring and Annie's illness doesn't stop the family having new adventures bringing up three teenagers is them is a really interesting road to travel it's a very different sort of fun but it is good fun it is good fun shoot everything that moves Jack won't be darling I [Music] I'm so proud of them they're such lovely lovely children you know it's all good this is just perfect for an e/m for the boys because Annie's in under the shade and the tents there and the boys are just running around like mad things having a wonderful time so everyone is happy and that makes me very happy I think this is something special isn't it no yes I'm older I think I appreciate it so much more so much more you know don't you think I nearly missed it I nearly missed it [Music] it's been a month since Baby Harry was born and at 46 Darren's getting used to being a new mum all over again I just can't believe we've managed to produce such a cutie and her content as well I was a bit worried when I first got home just being fingers and thumbs for the first time and you know worrying I was gonna drop him which I think every mother does doesn't matter how many children you have and the weeks have just flown by really she doesn't just seem second agented she's an absolute wonderful mother she's a terrific mother holla see she really is that's one of the nicest aspects Oh is she is such a good mother with him and dave is loving father hard to quite a cynical old bugger and I thought I'd be quite matter-of-fact about it but when I just saw the top of his head had burst into tears and then when they passed him to me and he turned his head and looked to me I just I'd ever in all my life I lived to be 500 I will never ever have a moment like that it was absolutely wonderful and it's just terrific and they've got a message for the doctor who said they didn't need contraception because Darren was too old I was shocked when don't always use payment but I'm Blum and pleased to tell you that he was wrong because they wouldn't don't say it doesn't get much better than that sauce he really doesn't get much better I mean if he doctors watching you a good lad in fact has given me the taste we were thinking of going for twins Howie oli understand because this is it I think this year ought to be the year 2006 of the Jones children and then that'll be it for the moment Dave and Darrin are still living apart but they're saving up so that next year they can get married and build a house and a future together when he's 20 I'll be 66 which is an ancient I'm hoping it doesn't worry Harry more than anything you know when you're taking him to school I don't give a damn what anybody thinks to be honest because he's so perfect I don't see a poem to be honest they tell you all the bad bits but they don't tell you at the end of it you could have a perfectly good healthy baby so I think we should write a positive book about being over 40 don't we [Music] [Music]

Channel: Real Stories

Views: 1,793,631

Keywords: only human, 2017 documentary, Amazing Documentaries, tlc, timeline, Real Stories, Extraordinary people, Documentary Movies - Topic, BBC documentary, Documentaries, Full length Documentaries, Documentary, Amazing Stories, Channel 4 documentary, Full Documentary, TV Shows - Topic

Id: lYsghicJyRU

Length: 67min 33sec (4053 seconds)

Published: Sat Jan 27 2018