BRINKLOW BROADCAST : Women's Day 2021

[Music] [Applause] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] foreign [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] i [Music] so [Music] so foreign [Music] so [Music] hmm [Music] good morning and welcome to the emmanuel burn close seven-day adventist church on behalf of the women's ministry committee i want to say welcome we know you could choose to be anywhere you want to be but you have chosen to be with us and we are grateful we just want you to know that we've all been there it's been a long year but our soul will be water today so please plan to hang out with us for a little while after the midday service just hang around we're going to have a wonderful discussion where our soul will be nurtured so please again welcome christ welcome to you good morning happy sabbath and happy women's day brinkleo family i am lynette yancy robinson representing brinkleo cares and your grocery grab and go committee with a reminder that grocery grab and go is tomorrow march 28th at 11 30 a.m you can pick up food for your friends and neighbors and at 7 00 a.m we are requesting volunteers um today is women's day and we're celebrating everything black girl magic however at 7 00 am tomorrow we need manpower so if you're available and you can come out and help us get set up unload vehicles that would be awesome and then at 8 00 a.m we need help with sorting we need about four to five people to come and help repair bags at 10 a.m we need two to three people to help load vehicles and then at 11 a.m we need help with clean up so at each of those time slots we need about two hours of your time it's fun it's fulfilling and we're looking forward to seeing you if you're interested in volunteering please contact me lynette yancey robinson or glenda roberts see you tomorrow have a great day [Music] [Music] [Music] happy sabbath wrinkle family let's pray father in heaven thank you so much for blessing us so abundantly thank you for this women's day may we hear from you may we continue to bask in your presence and me may we share your love with everyone we can come in contact with in jesus name i pray amen happy sabbath and good morning bring well today's woman of distinction award honoree is well before i tell you who she is i want to tell you a little bit more about her how many of us have had the privilege to work with young people to work with the youth what a blessing right well we usually work with them while our kids are young and then as our children get older we kind of slack off or we stop maybe we hang in there for a year or two maybe even three as an assistant or volunteering but over time we kind of move on well our honoree has been working with children's ministries for over 40 years she started her ministry in new york at kingston 7th adventist church in the 80s while her three children were young now she was very busy she was a junior sabbath school teacher and had her children in various activities with the church all while she worked the full-time job she wasn't the type to put her kids in an activity and then leave and then just come back to pick him up nope not her she was right there being fully engaged the entire time she was involved from start to finish she would always find a way to help and make sure the program was spiritually focused successful and fun her kingston family recognized her commitment and dedication with the well-deserved award for service she relocated to maryland with her family in the mid 90s and soon after started attending brinklaw's 7th adventist church and there or here she got to work she started helping out with the pathfinder club the drum corps children's church and other children's ministries activities again she was hands-on and very present she gave generously of her time and financial resources to ensure that these programs were successful her energy and her smile fueling the kids and everyone around her to do their best and most of all have fun she was your spiritual guide as well she taught the junior sabbath school class for almost 20 years many of the young people watching and listening today have benefited from her prayers her love and from her hugs as a student in her class think about it she continued to teach the junior sabbath school class for almost 12 years after her youngest child graduated from the class that shows her love for the children i mean her youngest was a college student and actually graduated from college and she was still teaching that chosen dedication to the ministry god called her to do well if that wasn't enough she was also a premier volunteer at spenceville juventus academy while her son was a student there when he transferred to tacoma academy she worked with some of the parents and they founded the tacoma academy boosters club a club of service dedicated to enhancing the school's athletic program that was over 12 years ago and up until march 2020 right before the pandemic closed our schools you would still see her at every tacoma academy home game setting up the concession stand running the concession stand with assistance and after breaking down the concession stand faithfully every home game again let's think about this her son graduated from high school over eight years ago and she's still there at tacoma academy dedicated to the kids and her ministry now if you ask her why she's still working with the young people even though her children are grown and some have children of their own yes she is a grandmother her response is and always will be because i love the children i do it because i love the children so the takeaway lesson is if you want to look young and stay young feel young you have to work with young people but the catch is you have to work with them for years and years and years and years and years but obviously the benefit is worth it please join me in honoring our most reluctant honoree roslyn cares or as we affectionately call her aunt roz she is the mother of three our very own jelani and tai and sakai and the grandmother of four including uriah and jamel oh and if that's not enough she still works full time as an engineer at lockheed martin she says that she doesn't want to accept any awards here while she's on earth everything that she does is for the glory of god her reward is seeing the children smile and working with the children so she was very reluctant to accept this award but on behalf of brinkle cemetery venice church and the women's ministry we want to say thank you for obeying god's voice so wholeheartedly and for your commitment and service to our kids we love you aunt rise we do thank you under the third and fourth generation a family and ministry serving others a tradition of compassionate care during special times of need from 1957 the march family has dedicated their lives to comforting those who have been touched by the sting of death first peter 2 9 speaks of being chosen and belonging to a royal priesthood this is what i believe is true about the march family constantly utilizing their gifts in ministry to others during a most vulnerable time a time of grief and loss however their philosophy is that this is a time for reflection appreciation and even celebration of a special life for all life is special while we so much appreciate the entire march family this is a story about a young woman who serves with honor and distinction she is a third generation funeral director who has been born into a legacy for service even as a young child she demonstrated a special affinity to follow the family tradition from greeting families answering phones then learning all the ins and outs of floral design to graphics and community relations and marketing the family business only later to be a part of the corporate operations of the business carmelita graduated with honors and at the top of her class in mortuary science in 2009 she was also awarded the coveted outstanding student award there is so much to tell about carmelita and her many accomplishments but now as the company celebrates 64 years of service carmelita remains humbled and proud to serve in her capacities her responsibilities as vice president involve managing the day-to-day operations and staff of all seven of her family's funeral homes the largest african-american owned and operated cemetery in these united states king memorial park and supporting roles in her family's non-profit organizations roberta's house a family grief and law center and the thelma march scholarship foundation she has proudly received numerous community acknowledgments for her service but considers her highest reward to be the look of peace and gratitude she receives from families at the conclusion of a well-organized and thoughtful celebration of life for their loved one although she has been seen on the front line organizing several high-profile funerals and services for notable people from baltimore to washington dc every family she serves fuels her dedication to her personal ministry of funeral service carmelita is a proud wife a fellow entrepreneur husher harris ii and the mother of three beautiful girls we thank carmelita and the march family in a very special way for how they have assisted so many families of the immanuel brinklo church family and for all of this we honor you today carmelita march harris to realize god's calling at an early age is a blessing opening your heart to be used in ministering to others is what god intended for your life well done carmelita well done wow to god be the absolute glory i am beyond humbled i'm floored um i sit here today in a funeral home and i'm in need of a tissue myself um you got me thank you so much for this what i really have to say with all sincerity because i was not prepared for this is thank you to your church and for all that you have done pastor medley mrs coleman betsy johnson amongst others one thing in particular that has been really important to me personally and i'm proud to sit next to my father here and share this with you all is you all have from the moment i stepped into your church you not only embraced me as a company you supported my company but you invested in me you all embraced me and you let me know that you saw something special in me that was just you don't realize how important that is to you especially as your job is to comfort and encourage others support others so you all literally stand out amongst the highest of those who have touched literally embraced and wrapped yourselves around me to let me know that i had something to offer i could do this and that matter god bless you all thank you so much proud of you thank you god bless you wow you got me thank you happy sabbath everyone our bible reading today is taken from the book of esther chapter 4 verses 13 to 17. and i'm reading from the new american standard bible version then modicai told them to reply to esther do not imagine that you in the king's palace can escape more than all the other jews for if you keep silent at this time liberation and rescue will arise for the jews from another place and you and your father's house will perish and who knows whether you have not attained royalty for such a time as this then esther told them to reply to mordecai go gather all the jews who are found in susa and fast for me do not eat or drink for three days night or day i and my attendants also will fast in the same way and then i'll go into the king which is not in accordance with the law and if i perish i perish so mordecai went away and did just as esther had commanded him may the lord add his blessings to the reading of his word amen our speaker for the hour is pastor lola moore johnston she's a native of elizabeth new jersey and is the first of three daughters born to marilyn and calvin moore iii she felt the call of god on her life at an early age and began serving in various ministry capacities at the trinity sda church in newark new jersey she emerged as a leader and change agent during her studies at la sierra university in riverside california where she graduated with her bachelors in religious studies her preparation continued at the sda theological seminary at andrews university where she earned a masters of divinity since then she has served the lord as chaplain in orlando florida and pastor at the oakland university church in huntsville alabama maranatha and emmanuel churches in northwest florida and the nashville riverside church in tennessee her service in that region culminated with her appointment as young adult director for the south central conference of seventh-day adventists in 2015. along with formal ministry pastor johnston is blessed to share the good news of jesus as recording artist empowerment coach and author while bountifully blessed to enjoy success personally and professionally god saw it fit to bless her even more with great joy pastor johnston married her friend and partner in life keith johnston in november of 2016. pastor johnston currently serves as the senior pastor of the woodbridge seventh-day adventist church in woodbridge virginia after our special music by joseanne and vienne etieme the next voice we will hear will be that of pastor lola moore [Music] johnston [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] blue [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] hmm [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] good [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] you [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] um [Music] uh [Music] foreign [Music] all to god be the glory how beautiful that peace was and we want to say thank you so much to the etime sisters for sharing their gift with us in worship today well happy sabbath everyone it is an honor and privilege to be here in the virtual worship space of the brinkles seventh-day adventist church emmanuel brinkglow and i want to thank your pastoral staff and the persons of dr medley washington pastor esmen williams and brown i tell you these men stand head and shoulders above the rest in ministry and i counted a privilege to be here in space with you i also want to thank sister audrey taylor for her kindness in extending the opportunity to share on women's day with this group of women and uh just from the distance it is incredible to see just how much black girl magic there is in this group i heard it uh spoken earlier so i just took the opportunity to acknowledge the fact that the women here have been doing a tremendous job of standing up and representing the kingdom and so i want to say for all that god has done through each of you to god be the glory great things he has done in a happy women's month to each one of you as we look to the word today i want to bring a message that has been particularly pertinent for me in this season and i want to look to a familiar passage of scripture we're looking at esther chapter four we thank our reader for sharing that with us i'd like to share it one more time to frame the context of our discussion for today that's esther chapter four i'm beginning my reading in verse number 13 and i'll be reading from the new living translation of the bible again esther chapter 4 verse 13. it begins in this way mordecai sent this reply to esther don't think for a moment that because you're in the palace you will escape when all the other jews are killed if you keep quiet at a time like this deliverance and relief for the jews will arise from some other place but you and your relatives will die who knows if perhaps you were made queen for such a time as this verse 15 then esther sent this reply to mordecai go and gather together all the jews of susa and fast for me do not eat or drink for three days night or day my maids and i will do the same and then though it is against the law i will go in to see the king and if i must die i must die the king james version says and if i perish i perish so verse 17. so mordecai went away and did everything that esther had ordered him today i'd like to speak from the subject it's time it's time let's pray father in the name of jesus we thank you for the privilege of sharing in your word together we ask that as you have given us this privilege that we would hear not from lola more johnston but from you speak a word and do season god and may it water our hearts in a way that is tangible and lasting speak lord all right your servants are listening and it is in jesus name we pray amen it's time we recognize in this season that not every story that takes place in a palace is a fairy tale and it's sad to recognize how many directions i can take it right from there because over and over again we have seen the stories of women who have been in ideal uh dream worthy situations that have not panned out well and i recognize that our desire for a fairy tale our desire for a pristine ending has often time caused us to gloss over yea even disregard the the distinct details involved in women going from where they began to where they are now and i recognize that one such story is the story of esther we have uh thought that because she became a queen that hers was a story that is a fairy tale but as i go back through these chapters to mine through the occasions that are written here i recognize that hers is anything but she is a young woman probably somewhere around 16 or 17 years old living in sousa because she and her family have been exiled as a part of the jewish exile which means that they are not living in their home of origin we also recognize that as her family story is laid out that she does not live with her father or her mother she is living with an older cousin mordecai who has adopted her which would share with us that she has suffered immense law she is not with her parents she is living in this strange nation and for all intention purposes her lifestyle does not represent a traditional jewish one because she is able to move forward undetected and think about this woman who has lost her parents this woman who is not living in her land of origin this woman who is doing what she needs to do to get by this woman who's living with this older cousin in this untraditional circumstance this woman who is doing everything that she can to be normal when her life is turned upside down again the bible lets us know that that the king uh has a disagreement with his wife vashtai and after 30 days of drinking with his buddies they think it is a good idea to have the queen come and dance for them and when vashtai stands up and and lets them know that this is not what she was called for in a drunken decision he and his friends determined to divest her of her queen ship and to go throughout the nation to to to reap a harvest of every young woman who has not yet been married to bring all of them to the paris and to the palace and each one of them would perform a and act with the king on on one night in order to determine whether or not they are queen material now i want you to just think through that and you recognize that that that had to be the the the result of a drunken stupid nobody in their right mind would do something like this but here is esther minding her business living her life and she is now swept up in a whirlwind of confusion because of someone's drunken decision she has now become a victim of sexual trafficking and legal documentation has been drawn up to snatch her out of her home and at 16 years old she now goes for a contest with the king oh it's anything but a fairy tales it's nothing like the type of pristine story that we have been told about esther but this is the role that she is walking in order to move forward and the bible says that for one year this 16 year old anybody have a 16 year old out there a young woman who you have been loving a young woman who you've been educating a young woman who you have been keeping beautiful a young woman who you have been telling about self-esteem the young woman who you have been protecting against all of the elements and i want you to imagine with me that that young woman who you've been praying over that young woman who you have been pouring into that young woman who you have paid good money to educate is now snatched from your home and taken as property to the palace oh my goodness for the next year that young woman is treated with oils and spices in order to show up a year later as a specimen for the king to behold and and the bible lets us know that as she is in this process this process that she didn't ask for this process that nobody could have predicted the bible lets us know that god gives her favor with the one who is preparing the women for this act now now i i know that that that all of us come from different lifestyles we come from different places but i want you to imagine with me what it would take for us to believe that god would give a woman in sexual trafficking favor that god would favor her in that area in that arena that god in that act in that very terrible act that god would allow her to stand head and shoulders above the rest that that she in in that place would be seen as something special that she not being rescued from there would be seen as something that is rare that is unique that is brilliant so much so that the captain of the guard begins to give her extra spices the captain of the guard begins to give her extra oil the captain of a guard begins to talk to her about her sleep and beauty regimen that the captain of the guard personally takes it upon himself to ensure that she is well and and i want to share with you today that this is a place where i start to get excited because i recognize that i serve a god who is favorable to me and who allows me to experience blessings in less than ideal situations that i may not have been in the best neighborhood that i may not have had the best educational background that my parents may not have been able to give me the best education but god in his mercy he came down to the ghetto come on in here he came out to the yard he he went to those less than pristine places and god showed goodness and favor to me he began to show me a little extra mercy and notes but anybody here at brinklow today able to say that god showed up in places that the church said that he would not that that god came down to my less than ideal situation and he he showed me some wisdom that that other people would know that one of my my mentors in my doctoral program tells her testimony how she before her christianity uh she was a drug dealer and and as she was dealing drugs in in the the urban setting of new jersey that she was having a conversation with another drug dealer and as they were sitting in the car just enjoying themselves listening to the radio that one drug dealer said to this drug dealer who is now my mentor that that she was smart in and that she was the kind of person who should succeed in college that that she should should consider going to school this woman had not completed high school she didn't have a ged but on the word of one drug dealer to another drug dealer my mentor went in and took a ged and she decided to to go to a four-year school because she wasn't in uh she wasn't uh uh happy about the idea of a two-year school she fills out the application and within one week she receives her ged scores and is able to qualify to go into that school and as she goes into the school come on here she had been a single parent and a drug dealer but as she is there she is she begins to to feel a disdain for christianity because christians in her estimation were not able to defend the faith properly and and someone who was a professor in that school heard her disdain and heard her begin to argue the tenets of the faith the way christians should argue it and her professor said to her that she should go to seminary in fact that professor said to this single mother come on in here said to this person who had been a drug dealer that if you decide to go to seminary i'll pay for it and my my my mentor today who is the mentor of the demon program who who is who is one who is revered all over christianity used to be a drug dealer was a single mother who god spoke to as a drug dealer and i want to share with you today if you don't know it that we serve a god who goes into less than ideal places he goes into the dirty and grimy and in less than then pristine places in order to deliver people who cannot get out by themselves so here is esther and she's being prepared for this act by the king of the guard who is giving her extra spices and extra oils and the time for her for her to show up it arrives and the bible says that when she goes in to the king for this less than ideal behavior for for something that we would disfellowship her for the bible says that god shows up in that space and gives her favor so that the king forgets about everything that happens before and is not worried about anything that'll happen after come on i'm gonna shout by myself i'm gonna zoom anyway the bible lets us know that god gets down there in that dark moment and god does something supernatural for her to allow her to stand out with all of the young women in susamo who are on the the itinerary she is able to stand up with the king says that's it that's enough this is it this is what i want and so god promotes esther into the queendom through a less than ideal place and i just want to ask is there anybody here in emmanuel bring close seventh day adventist church who god promoted through less than ideal circumstances you know that you're here but it's not because of the school you went to some of us didn't go to school it's not because the family you went to where you were you were from because your name your family name didn't mean anything it's not because of the career you had because some of us didn't have money we didn't have career we're here all because of the grace of god ah yes because of the lord's mercy we will not consume his compassion it fails not as new every morning great is his faithfulness oh my goodness she is now queen and and the bible says that a great grand banquet is thrown for her she is beloved by the king she's made it y'all she is now the epitome of jewish girl magic she has all of the dresses that she could ever have come on her closets are full she has people waiting on her hand and foot she's able to eat cucumber sandwiches and crumpets and and have fine tea on on fine china all day she she's made it y'all come on she is the most beautiful woman in the land she she has the most enviable space in the land all of the sorrows from the past are forgotten and in the future is nothing but brightness and she's able to sit down and enjoy herself and she does until she gets word that her uncle excuse me her cousin is outside acting the fool oh my goodness i tell you this is where the story makes a pivot because she's living well and all is well but then her family starts acting crazy and i won't go down the aisle and ask if anybody knows anything about that you know you got your degree and and you you're in a fine job but your family hasn't quite made it there yet you still have to you know kind of tiptoe around certain neighborhoods because people might know you associated with some people who are still outside i understand it's okay esther is in the palace and she's keeping everything together because now she's the queen but her family member is embarrassing her and so she sends word to mordecai because mordecai is about to mess everything up but the story this this interesting twist here i think is instructive for people like me and you because as esther has been enjoying her tea and crumpets on the inside as she has been enjoying the spoils of her labor as she has come out of hardship into grandeur life is still going on outside ah there's still stuff that is brewing in in the culture there's still hardships that the people are facing but esther because she has gone through everything that she has gone through because she has faced the hardships she has faith esther is completely out of touch with the community when esther hears about mordecai all she knows is her cousin may have had a breakdown he's he's doing something uh unreal it's unbelievable it's embarrassing and so she sends word to mordecai to get him to pull it together but mordecai sends word back that is interesting to me i think it's going to be interesting to you mordecai sends this word back you should read through esther uh through the sabbath there's some time that you have to be able to read through it and see the story pan out she he sends word back that that there has been an edict that has gone through the whole nation yea even the world there that that has has uh dedicated a certain day and time to the slaughter of all the jews that because of this edict without in well with impunity anyone could kill a jewish person and take their property and everybody in the jewish nation is grieving so you mean to tell me that esther who is in the palace who is down the hall from where edicts are written is sitting there with her tea and crumpets eating her cucumber sandwich and is completely unaware of what has passed because she she doesn't know anything about what's happening to a people the the plight of her people is completely lost on her i mean she hadn't heard anything she she she hasn't been reading the newspaper she hadn't been listening to the news wire she she hadn't been paying attention to the nation at all and i think here is it is a place where many of us find ourselves when we finally get over come on when when the real trial and tribulation is over when when we have recognized that that our story come on has come to a fantastic end when we have climbed the hill and we have been victorious when we have defended that dissertation when we have been able to move from one level of academia to another we can be people who have developed tunnel vision that we we have found that that our toil is done our our struggle is over and so now we're going to focus on us and ours because we've done our part and all the while there are people who are around us who are struggling people around us who are ailing people around us who have not received a happy ending but because we've done our part because we have ascended to the next level we don't care oh my goodness esther is listening to this edict and and we recognize here after she receives this word from mordecai that the whole nation is grieving that that everybody is going to be killed in a few days what esther's real challenge is she sends word back to mordecai she says to this older cousin you don't recognize that i'm here because i have to stay in this box i i'm here and i only leave my little space when when they call for me when when the king beckons for me is when i call it's against the law for me to go over there without uh uh speaking to him or without hearing from him first it's against the law for me to ever assert myself in this relationship it's against the law for me to get out of my role in order for me to keep what i have i have to stay in this box and how many of us have been invited to sit at tables but we stay right in that little box how many of us have been given uh all kinds of authority and and positions of power but we stay in our box how many of us have been given opportunities to speak to people of power but we stay in our box because we are afraid that stepping out of our box means that we will be eliminated from the equation in essence we believe that we don't belong there for real and if we don't play by the rules that our story will be over esther hears the plight of the people and she understands that plight but she says i have a good thing going on here and i'm not going to step out of line and jeopardize what i've worked so hard for does that sound familiar does does that ring true for anybody here that sometimes we find ourselves playing the role even in moments where we realize we should speak up that that we find ourselves being silent when we know that our voice and our perspective could move the needle where we find ourselves not standing up for someone else because we don't know who will stand for us and because we have chosen to be silent because we are afraid of the implications and the fallout there are people around us who are losing who are dying who are being eliminated all because we have chosen not to speak but thank god for mordecai we thank god for mordecai today because mordecai does not take that no as an answer mordecai does not allow sister esther to believe that she's okay sitting in the ivory tower looking out the window at the people on the outside mordecai is not satisfied with allowing esther to move forward because she's afraid for her life mordechai finally tells the whole truth in a way that esther can catch it he says to her huh do you believe that if the people out here don't make it that you're gonna be safe do you believe that that that if we are in danger that you're safe do you believe that that somehow you gonna be the only jew in the land who's going to escape what's happening out here in these streets do you believe that you'll be the only one who is not recognized the only one who's going to go under the radar do you believe that's going to be the case in fact let me go let me go and give you some real news here if you don't speak god who is faithful will find somebody to speak for god's going to raise up a voice from somewhere god's going to find somebody who's going to speak at that table it may be an outlier it may be a dark horse it may be somebody who you weren't thinking about somebody who you didn't recognize but god is gonna find somebody to speak watch this and if you are not the one to speak when when deliverance comes you're gonna be left out oh wait a minute here hold on do you mean that that i could be in a place where i'm protecting myself but because i am not using my voice for the benefit and the blessing of someone else that what i'm trying to protect what i think that i've worked so hard for what what i believe that i've earned with my own sweat and tears could be snatched from me as well well don't we see that happening all around us right here in the united states as we see individuals who are affluent people who have worked well uh people who have gotten into places of power but those who are in seats of authority have tried to snatch voting rights from those people haven't you seen how there are laws in place that that allow police to to kill and to maim black lives with impunity don't you see that that when you're out there if if the laws have not been properly dealt with if if the system has not been dealt with that that your daughter or your son can be the victim of the very things that people who haven't worked as hard as you and people who are not as educated as you have to deal with you recognize that although you sit in the ivory tower my brother my sister that we are all in this thing together that that the expectation is that that when we get to these places that god has placed us there not just to be safe from the elements on the outside but to be alike and salt on the inside that god has not just placed us there so that we can be on magazine covers come on and be the 50 under 50 or the 40 under 40 the 30 under 30 god has placed us on those lists so that those who can't get to the list those who don't know there is the list might be blessed and and and and and allowed to get all kinds of miracles happen because we are there we're not just here to enjoy the food and to enjoy the clothes we're there to be a voice for the voiceless oh my goodness mordecai says and if you aren't the voice then god's gonna find a voice and eliminate you oh either esther was convicted by what he said or afraid of what could happen and esther decides to mobilize herself she says i want you to call on every jew in the nation i want you to pray for me i want you to fast for me because i need some help i i need you to to call on god for me i i'm in a precarious situation because the truth is i i could be ousted she is on the heels of of a story just a year ago of how esther excuse me how vashtai when vashta speaks out on her own behalf when ashton vastar speaks up in order to be saved from being exploited she is thrown out the palace esther recognizes the danger but esther knows that there is a deeper a higher call on her life and so she goes to a source that is higher than her she goes to a source that has been delivering without fail she goes to a source that is faithful and i want to just give that as a prescription before i close to somebody here who is thinking about this message and saying yes i do sit in seats of privileges but i i'm not sure if if my voice is strong enough yes i have been able to be in some spaces where other people aren't but but i know they don't want to hear what i have to say i've tried to give ideas i've tried to do things and i've been burned before i want to share with you today that there is still a god in heaven who is empowering those who move on his behalf there is a god in heaven who is giving wisdom to those who lack wisdom there is a god in heaven who's empowering those who need to step on toes come on in the boardroom who need to step outside the bar of the boxing in some precarious places there is a god in heaven who is empowering people to do just that the eyes of the lord roam to and forth without throughout the earth looking for somebody to empower to do just this my goodness they pray and they fast for three days and i'll just tell the rest of the story as we close as they pray and they fast esther comes up with an idea she decides that she's going to override royal protocol she's going to act like a queen and not like a servant oh somebody needs that word here today she's going to use her privilege in order to speak and the bible says that she makes her way to war where the king has his meeting she's probably praying along the way walking her heart is beating fast her palms are sweaty but she makes her way to where the king has his meetings and and the question is will she be well received when she walks in what will the king do he he hasn't called for her in 30 days he he hasn't had need of what he wanted her to provide in in over a month she she has been in her own space and as she moves into his space the bible says that she goes in come on and not only is the king welcoming of her he's happy to see her come on he recognizes that he is mister he recognizes that this is his queen and he receives her with a smile i want to share with somebody in here today who has been afraid to use your voice who has been afraid to speak up in places of privilege who has been afraid to actually move outside your box that you would be surprised who has been waiting to hear from you who has been praying for you to speak up who has been asking god for someone with your expertise and your perspective to say something you will be surprised who is looking for you to stand up who is silently hoping that you will be brave you'll be surprised to understand that many of us have not been received because we haven't tried we haven't even said that there's a new idea we haven't even shared that there's a new perspective we have been afraid to say that the way we're doing it is not the best it's not the best practice it's not the way that it should go there's a more efficient way there's a more unilateral way there is a more equitable way to do this and somebody's been waiting for you to speak because esther risks her comfort because she risks her position the story continues that she saves an entire nation this woman who lost her family this woman who was snatched from her home this woman who was subjugated to behavior that we would turn our face against we this woman who is now in the palace and who has been afraid to speak when she finally chooses to use her voice it is her voice in a patriarchal society it is her voice where jews are the bottom of the totem pole it is her voice that saves the nation today as we talk about man this black girl magic that god has sprinkled over all of us i believe that that magic is not just so that we wear cute clothes and pretty pictures it's not so that we can say that we took trips and we got new cars and new homes although all of them are great god has given us this privilege so that we can be a voice for the voiceless i want to say to you today it's time my sister it's time to come out of your box it's time to venture away from the seat that has your name on it in the table it's time for you to step outside of your purview the one that has been allotted to you and to use your voice to help the voiceless ah today there's somebody who is in a place where you can be influential but you've been nervous about using your influence in of popular areas you've been coloring in the lines and doing what they said you could do doing what is socially acceptable doing what would keep you in certain places with certain people doing certain things but now in 2021 if we ever needed your voice before we need it now we need you to speak on behalf of those who have no voice god needs you to speak in those places so that god's people who are shackled who are bound who are disenfranchised who have been disempowered can now experience the goodness of the kingdom that's you you want to say god teach me to use my voice for the voiceless and you know in your area in your arena who the voiceless are it's not just poor people in the hood it may be women who are unable to do things on your job and you believe that there should be a more diverse workspace it can be that you're the only black person in your arena and you think and you know that there need to be more black people in your area then there may be a program that you know your your business has enough money to fund but but it's going to take you using some social capital in order to move that forward and it may be that god is looking to you to come out of your non-religious space and start to speak christianity and peace and to speak healing into people who need more than motivational speaking god needs your voice you're wanting to use your voice for him today i just want you to say that's me in the comment go to the chat that's me that's me i have a voice and i have influence i have access i have a seat at the table i want to use my voice to help god's people all of them that's me come on let's pray father in the name of jesus we want to say thank you for how you brought us over if it had not been for you on our side we know exactly where we would be we would be still in the same neighborhood we would be underemployed unemployed we would be a victim of circumstance god we wouldn't have education but god because you showed mercy and empowered us lord we are in places of privilege and blessing and we say thank you god to you be the glory great things you have done like esther god we living the life now but we recognize that outside of our box there is a world that's hurting lord we pray that you would expand our borders would you open our eyes to see what breaks your heart around us would you open our eyes to see what you have uniquely blessed us to be able to speak to god would you open our eyes to see where our hands our feet our voice are necessary so that your kingdom would come and your will would be done in earth as it is in heaven we pray that you will bless this wonderful church and bless our pastors oh god bless our leadership oh lord thank you so much for them leading us in so many ways into places and spaces where people are blessed we want more territory enlarge their territory for you is our prayer so that when you come and every eye will see you that we together will be able to say lo this is our god we have waited for him and he will save us and it is in the name of jesus we pray amen and amen sister audrey made sure that i didn't leave here empty-handed and so she wanted to ensure that i shared with you in another way and so i'd like to leave with you a song that talks about the greatest name ever the name of jesus so at this time i want to share with you a song entitled that name [Music] there is a name that is so precious a name so wonderful to me this name is worthy of for praises because of him i am [Music] name is jesus i love him the one who gave his life of me because love is so unconditional i will have life eternally this name speaks peace unto my storm clouds this name speaks calm unto my fear and when i feel that no one loves me his loving presence is i love him the one who gave his life for me because of love so unconditional i will have life eternally praise that name [Music] crazy [Music] now someday i'll leave this early dwelling through timeless face my soul will soar and finally see the face of jesus and praise his name forevermore that name is jesus oh how i love him one who gave his life he gave his life he gave his lies for me because of love so unconditional is your name say glorious is your name hallelujah you wonderful wonderful wonderful is your name oh please [Music] hallelujah oh i know you have been blessed and we will just want to thank our speaker again for such a wonderful sermon and at this moment we're going to transition into the next part of our program so please hang around and if you want to be a part of the discussion go to um or church lobby area and type in your password brinkleo so again we want to thank you for being with us be prepared and at this time we'll have our prayer as we transition shall we bow our hands for prayer heavenly father we come to you once more because you are a mighty mighty god as we continue our worship experience today lord and we go into this discussion on this beautiful sabbath day on this holy day of yours dear lord we invite you to be in the midst of the conversation that will follow because you alone oh god are worthy of it all bless the participants that will continue the conversation of your word the word of truth and light dear lord we ask that it be a blessing to us all and especially to those that need to hear this very special message on this sabbath day dear lord the message that no matter the valley that we walk the hills we climb the adversities that we face that jesus is still the answer above all o lord may the conversation that will follow give you honor glory and praise because we ask this in jesus name amen ngozi irande asabiki is a serial entrepreneur and consultant with over 20 years of experience in business startups growth and acquisition and operations consulting with major u.s corporations and governments she is a recognized leader and visionary in the metropolitan dc area business community her honors include maryland's top 100 woman in 2006 and 2017 and a recent eight-year term appointment as commissioner by governor larry hogan jr on the commission on african affairs ngozi is very engaged in the community and serves on the board of various business civic non-profit organizations and universities she is a sought after speaker moderator facilitator and frequent radio and tv guest ngozi has broad multicultural business experience having lived and worked in europe africa and the asia pacific she has an mba from the american university go god college of business she will be our moderator for today good afternoon family happy sabbath i am excited to be a part of this round table today i just finished listening to pastor johnston and i don't know about you but i feel challenged in fact i think the challenge was to me to use my voice in places that i have not done before and i am prepared to go do that and i hope you are too i am excited to be a part of this roundtable and the topic we're going to discuss today is how do you handle fear stress and anxiety while building your legacy and as we just finished hearing esther must have had stress fear and anxiety in her position as the queen but today we're going to talk about you not esther with all that is happening around us the pandemic of financial hardships natural disasters and just daily anxieties as humans we are prone to fear and in today's connected world the 24-hour news cycle the social media that we can't get away from fear can turn to panic in a matter of minutes and even a matter of seconds an unmarried sister may live in fear that he that she will never get married another may fear that she might not have enough money others live in fear of carbon 19 i know i do too and deteriorating health some may fear losing status of friends a family others may fear that someone else may say something to them about them or do something to them some fear themselves and what they may do or say fear stress anxiety we are all facing these emotions today at some level or another and they can be debilitating they can push us to wrong actions or freeze us into inaction so how should a follower of jesus respond when fear comes how can we keep god god's instructions to fear not in the midst of the environment in which we find ourselves how should we as followers of jesus respond to this crisis like coronavirus or disasters around us and their related impacts what does scripture advise us to do during turbulent time when we fear or live in a constant state of anxiety does it mean we are sinning does it mean we lack faith i don't know so it is just too much for us to bear some days but the good news is still the good news our god of impossibilities he is still on the throne and he can handle all things concerning us so this afternoon relax and let's get started because we've got amazing women who are here to share thoughts with you and answer some of these questions so i like to at this moment then hear these women who are living in their purpose who are ministering who are inspiring believers a long life's journey and like you and me these women also have a lot to bear a lot on their plates they have families to take care of they have careers to maneuver they have aging parents they have church communities they have so much more going on in their lives just like you and me so at this moment i'd like to introduce these women to you we have pastor lola johnson what an inspiring sermon pastor thank you for joining us this afternoon we have dr darcia hastings proctor dr proto thank you for joining us as well we have roxanne mccoy chambers thank you roxanne for joining us and then we have dr herman percy dr percy thank you for joining us so what i'd like to do is for each of you to take a couple minutes to introduce yourself and tell us about yourself starting with dr johnston starting with pastor johnston at this moment well hello again everyone i am lola moore johnston and i am currently the senior pastor of the woodbridge seventh-day adventist church in woodbridge virginia i have been a career pastor for the past 10 years and i am native of new jersey so glad to be here today dr hayes thanks doctor can you introduce yourself good afternoon everyone thank you so much for the invitation i too am pleased to be here today and um i am a licensed psychotherapist a professional speaker and life coach and i practice in washington dc area i live in maryland i have a family of my own balancing work and life like many of you are and just pleased to be here today to share my knowledge and uh my wisdom from above and from what i've learned through my experiences amen roxanne it looks like she hasn't joined us yet hello everyone there she is my name is roxanne mccoy chambers i am the wife of pastor chambers who serve as a assistant professor i am also a mother of three lovely children ages nine five and yes one i'm also a teacher of science presently i teach chemistry and integrated science i'm also a person love to share the word who love to minister to women i serve as the vice president of our pastoral shepherdess club in the central jamaica conference and i am just so excited to share with you this afternoon and to learn as much as i can and just to build up the kingdom of god for women thank you so much amen dr percy please introduce yourself hi brinco family it's good to be on a panel to give a voice to for the women of brinklow um i am as many of you already know i'm your savage school superintendent and i'm also a political scientist um university professor for political science also a journalist and an author and again it's good to be with you all for women's ministries women's history month thank you ladies for joining us so let's get started we have a set of questions for these ladies and um they are going to try to give us some wisdom and insights as much as they can this afternoon so let me start with dr pastor johnston and uh but you know my question is there's there's just constant pressure never to shut our lives off but some of us are on all the time from the moment we wake up until the time we crash at night emails and alerts and not if you know notifications on our phones social media beckons us to just log on every time they never stop how do we live with all of this when jesus follows us are told to live anxious for nothing how do we do that how do we do that in this current state in which we are pastor johnston can you give us some wisdom well i want to honor the fact that um the constant cycle of work and responsibility is real and accessibility can feel like a necessity but i've recognized that i have to honor that i am a limited resource i i am i don't have infinite energy i don't have infinite wisdom i have to honor that and so as such i have to give myself permission to rest and i have to shut it off i've learned to say to myself now some of you are doctors i am not and so if i shut my phone off nobody's going to die you know they they may you know be waiting for my answer for a while but but everybody will be well and so you know i think with wisdom we have to learn how to understand that we can shut it off you can turn your phone off you can um and to create spaces uh to honor your need for rest you know with children and everything like that you know finding trusted people to help you to to get away even if it's for an hour even if it's for a walk um but but honoring the fact that i'm a limited resource i think is is one really important piece of that wow dr percy what do you do from the time we wake up which is first thing we want to do is pick up our phone and that creates a whole churn of his own for the day what do you do you know what well you know your question um talks about dealing with constant pressure the way you frame that question constant pressure and while you mention emails and social media you know what since it's women's history month i got to do real talk real talk because here we are in women's history month and we're all dealing with the impact of a global pandemic right and um i have to answer this question from a political point of view but the real talk is the fact that covet 19 has disproportionately affected more women than men um there was a recent survey that was taken and it found that women were affected men from employment to income to responsibilities at home and of course there's also the increased gender-based violence so we are really surrounded by calamities and misfortune and how do we deal with that if we think of that text you you framed in your question philippians 4 6 that says be anxious for nothing well really what that text is saying and that greek word there for the word anxious being careful it does not mean that we're not supposed to exercise any care about worldly matters or no care to preserve our property or no care to provide for families because the apostle that wrote for philippians 4 16 later on in first timothy 5 8 he says that if anyone does not provide for his own and especially for his own family he's not true to the faith and is worse than an unbeliever so i use that to remind myself that really what what paul is saying here is that we are supposed to stay confident in god to the point where it frees our mind from it from anxiety and we have total dependence on him for care and it will help to keep us calm in other words if you don't pray about everything then you'll be worried about most things wow what about you mrs chambers what do you do you've got kids one five and nine and you've got so much going on and you you still struggle i i would imagine like all of us with all of these constant pressures what do you do you know thank you for that you know one of the things that i have done to really organize myself where the pressures and the anxieties coming on is to prioritize you know i remember once i was sharing with my husband how overwhelmed i was with all that i had to do and you know he said something to me that still resonates with me even to this day he said you know in life there are some categories of things you have things that are urgent you have things that are important you have things that are important but they're not urgent you have things that are urgent but they're not important and then you have those things that are urgent and that are important try to focus on the things that are urgent and important and you know as i reflect on that i realize that there's so much that will pass us by if we throw our hands up in the air and pay attention to everything and i remember one time i was reading ellen white says that sometimes as mothers and wives we get bogged down by housework that the little minds are passing us and we have no time to read and inform ourselves and to be accompanied to our spouse and to be with our children and with that i started to trim down as pasta said you know starting to put things in perspective and then secondly i am always reminded of the story with mary and martha you know jesus said martha you're cumbered about so many things but one thing is needful and one day i sit and reflect not to talk too much as my sister charlie would say but i said to myself you know there's so many times we miss out on the needful thing you know they can take our jobs they can take away our position in church but they can't take away our relationship with god and so if i'm breastfeeding i am praying and if i have to run to the kitchen to make the part for the children i am i'm praying you know and i try my best to not miss out on that one needful thing and and that's what i want to encourage women to do you know don't let this one needful thing pass you by because that's the one needful thing that will journey with you even to the very end so i'm hearing you say have your heart in tune with god at all times at all times that's just the the most important thing and you know my late mother was a hard worker in church and if you see my sister charlene you would get a glimpse of what my mother was and you know when i visited her at the hospital she wasn't asking about the house or the welfare dinner or the pudding that she baked so well she was just saying to me roxanne all i want to do is to make sure that my soul is right with the lord and it reminds me of when jesus said to his disciples you know come apart take some time do not allow the activities of life to become your savior that you neglect to spend some time with me and i find that i'm much karma i'm much more dutiful i have more enduring spirit when i take time to nurture that one needful thing and and listen to me i'm not going to be a fanatic where this is concerned it might mean five minutes it might mean lying on your bed and just calling out to the lord you're gonna be different things to different women at different stage of your life but make sure that you find the time to nurture that one needful thing that you can always carry with you it transcends every period of your life that one needful thing thank you dr proctor what do you do um so the way i manage and deal with my own stressors um which there are very many as i've been hearing everybody uh talk about um is i try to first nurture my spirit i think that that's very important i can't do what i do without nurturing my spirit on a day-to-day basis so that starts off with prayer and reading the word every single day i try to carve out that time because i believe that it is important and it dictates how the rest of my day will look and you know how wonderful the spirit is everything that i need for that day is often always in that word and it takes me through the day because something or someone needs to hear that word so the holy spirit feeds it to me first and it gives me such a peace and a calm when i'm able to then see why i read what i read that morning or that earlier part of my day and like one of the panelists was saying i pray throughout the day everything i do i put god first i do a lot of speaking engagements and i never start speaking without praying because i recognize that i can do nothing or i i don't have the strength to do what i'm called to do without first checking in with my father and he gives me exactly what i need and i try to impart this wisdom even in my children and i'll tell you it's never too early to start i remember when my children were one and two years old when they first learned to talk we wouldn't leave the house until we had a family circle of prayer i also taught them that they needed to pray before every test that they they took just to remind them that it is not within your own strength but it's in within the strength of the father who gives you what you need and you know to this very day as we're all working in this pandemic life if i'm seeing a client they'll come to my office store and knock mommy i'm about to take a test let's pray and it gives me such delight because now i've transferred that to them and they can't get away from it and i'll say to them when mommy is busy it's okay for you to pray by yourself and they'll come back and say mommy i prayed and i passed and i passed this on to you because maybe for you it's not prayer maybe it's something else maybe it's meditating whatever it is you have to recognize that you need to fuel yourself first before you can give to others it's like what they tell us on the airplane put your mask on first before you help someone else and this is the exact same concept that we have to carry throughout our lives wow so let me ask you sometimes the sky is falling for some people you know you just freak out all day long anxiety and fear you have to recognize that you need to fuel yourself first before you can give to others i'm hearing feedback i am too so my question is going to be could anxiety and fear be catalyst for drawing you closer to god could fear actually be a motivator pastor johnson what do you think could fear be a motivator to us absolutely um i don't i don't think it's an ideal motivator but i do find myself when i am afraid running to god um i think that that is an ideal response when we are afraid but absolutely um i think that it is also important for us not to allow fear to have too much of a place there it can be a motivator but we have to learn how to speak to fear and to unseat fear with the word of god um as so many people have said before understanding that the word of god has power can help us to address fear right on and to run to god for the strength that we need amen that's doctor percy you know it's fear stress anxiety all those things sin does that do they demonstrate lack of faith in our lives when we experience them you know they considered human emotion right they're normal but when we are feeling them do they you know is that because we don't have enough faith are we even committing sin as we are living in this state well you know we have plenty of examples um in the bible of men of god and women of god dynamic women of god who um were were afraid or who were anxious or who were depressed um and david for example um when you read the book of psalms you see that david had all those emotions right and he was considered a man of god's own heart um and then you know when you look at the old testament you see examples of prophets um that were men of god dynamic jeremiah is known to be depressed elijah was suicidal martha since his women's history month got to throw a woman in their martha worried a lot these are real emotions is what we do with those emotions however that can be sinful right how we respond um when we are fearful and stressed out and so um that's what we are really talking about and and and how you you approach that definitely prayer is the first way that we are to begin and pouring out our hearts fully to god about everything um so uh absolutely i believe that um there are folks in the bible who have set that pattern for us to show us that it's okay to feel real emotions but it's how you deal with those emotions that you have to be mindful of dr proctor you're a psychotherapist when your clients come to you in this state of being um of just extraordinary fear and anxiety as a christian woman what do you do what do you say well it's very important um as a mental health professional to remember that yes i'm a christian but i also need to meet people where they are and i have to remember that everyone's journey is not the same so as you know um studies have shown that since this pandemic stress and anxiety has increased we are now up to over 40 uh 40 million people who are suffering from anxiety and i'll tell you the thing about anxiety left on check it leads to depression and depression has a whole host of other um unfortunate consequences on our lives and so that is something that we really need to take hold of take charge of so there are many many methods that i try to help my clients to to utilize to help them to lessen the um effects of anxiety on their lives for example um one of the things about managing anxiety is we have to remember that every single emotion that we have is a choice we choose to react and respond in the ways that we do we all experience things on different levels what might make you anxious may not necessarily make me anxious it depends on how we were socialized in life our experiences our values how we were taught to deal with certain emotions so i have to really uh figure out a lot of this with my clients and help them to understand why they react and respond the way that they do when they have these emotions such as fear stress and anxiety and then there are many methods that can be very very useful from the simple learning how to challenge your thoughts meaning that if you do choose to interact with your thoughts because that's what tends to happen anxiety is a spiraling emotion a thought pops into your head when that thought pops into your head you can either see it by letting it by captivating it and just allowing it to drift away or you can interact with it most people interact with their thoughts that thought feeds another feeds another and before long you've created a whole book that might not happen never happened or will not happen but in the mind of the person who is anxious these things are actually taking place so what they have to learn to do is to challenge negative thinking through a thought challenging exercise that we tend to teach them how to do it's easier said than done but with consistency and practice i find that many people can learn this technique they're also things like mindfulness meditation reminding us that we have no control over tomorrow or even the next minute the next hour what we have is the here and now so if you teach yourself how to stay in the moment and be mindful you will have less anxious episodes than people we find people having when they just become you know uh where we call them spiraling ongoing thoughts that wherein they feel they have no control over so those are just some techniques and method and i love when i have clients who come in who um express that they want christian counseling because that's one of the things that i always do and i have to allow them to express that first because as a professional you cannot of course impose your beliefs and your ways upon others but when those people come in and they're asking for this it makes so much of a difference in my life as a christian woman to be able to remind them of some of the teaching and principles that they have within them to be able to utilize to lessen their stress and anxiety or the reactions that they have um with that so i'm not sure if there's anybody on this line that's not on social media of some sort i'm not on facebook instagram snapchat none of those things just linkedin because i've got to lessen the tendency to get involved in some of these activities that will cause me more stress i've got an employee that is absolutely a dynamic speaker very competent but just feels inadequate all the time because she can't face herself when she looks at what she sees in social media and she compares people to herself and her anxiety and just concerns and stress flare what do we do in this situation when there's constant comparison of ourselves out there um and it fuels our fears and stresses and anxiety what what do we do and let me start with pastor johnston what do we do in this kind of situation women are prone to just comparing themselves to others out there how do we lessen this in our lives you know um i was hoping you didn't come to me first because i was thinking to myself what do i do you know it is difficult we live in a society where um you are consistently compared to someone else um you know i realized that as someone said earlier even the way that you were socialized you may still have the scars and burdens of comparison that happened in childhood that you bring into adulthood would make which makes you even more prone to feel inadequate and insecure you know i i personally have had to number one begin to believe what god has had to say about me and to honor that i am bought with a price that i am irreplaceable to god and begin there with the inherent value that is in me apart from what i do apart from how i look apart from what i gained or lost during coven 19. i have to start there but when i start there then i have to identify what are healthy practices and i know that dr proctor is going to have this all sewn up but just my this little piece there i have to identify what are healthy practices for me and there are times where social media involvement is not a healthy practice for me i may be in a place where i cannot handle that type of information there have been times where i've had to withdraw from social media because i was unhappy about my current situation and it seemed as though the algorithm could target that for me and everything that i wanted i could see someone else living out um i think it's also important to know that we all show up as our best representative on social media and so i'm not going to post my worst day i'm not going to post where i have a haircut that i don't like where my makeup is not right um and so even being able um she spoke about anxiety earlier being able to to face the reality that i am looking at representations of people that are not real but still there are moments where i am not healthy enough to be in that environment i have to remove myself from there um so so so that's that's been good for me to as you said just remove myself for a little while get healthy be in spaces that are life-giving for me and then to venture out see if it works and if not to pull back but that is difficult and we all face it for those of us raising daughters how do we help them feel enough same question and i'm going to ask roxanne how do we help our daughters feel that they are enough you know as they look at themselves and compare their friends and they're going places and they're not and their eyebrows are arched nicely and there's odds and oh my goodness you know that's an interesting question and i think it starts from an early age you know one of the things about parenting is that you get to be the first line of information and it's important to first of all affirm your daughters it's important for for her to hear daddy is beautiful you know it's like for my daughter every time i comb her hair or she gets ready for church or she feels so good she runs to her father's study and she awaits his affirmation and its excitement and that is very important when the family and i even culture her brothers to treat her well because that is the foundation while that well those years are the incubating years you surround her with love you affirm her you let her know it's beautiful and then there comes the time when she becomes aware and you have to educate her that there are persons who will look different from you there are certain norms that society has established that is beautiful but you need to a farmer to say listen each person is different and beautiful in their own way and one of the things you know james dobson share it and i think it's a beautiful concept and i've adopted it as a mother he said that there are a lot of times we introduce certain things into our girl's life that is the genesis of them suffering from self um inferiority complex the the barbie dolls that suggest you look a certain way you have a certain height and all of that that introduces into them through these different disney worlds and stuff that they are not enough and this is where we need to stop it right there we need not introduce these concepts to them and these hollywood stars and move it you know because i believe that pastor john said that this is their facebook when we introduce these a lot of princesses and dolls and stuff to let them feel as if from from a very early age i don't look like that then i'm not enough and that's something that we need to shoot down as teachers and uh mentors and parents to say that beauty comes in different packages and you allow them to to to feel so empowered that they go ahead to affirm others because one of the ways to accept yourself is to be able to accept others too and so you affirm them and allow them to to affirm others and so when we accept this diversity and my father always tell me look at nature show them the different colors flowers different shapes and show them that life is made up of verity and all of us have our own space and our own talents and our own looks and yet we are all beautiful in our different ways and this is something that i believe that we should do and it's something that i do with even my senior students affirming them and show them how mundane life would be if all of us look the same and that's why it endorsed the command cliche verity is the is the essence of life and that's something that we just need to culture and and and keep being repetitive about and that will build them as they they grow and mature dr proctor how do you deal with the impact of social media on your life and how well anybody else that you may even know and how it makes you feel and the mental agony that people experience from the comparisons that they make on social media yeah this is such a great question i'm so glad we're talking about it because um you know it's really important for us to make choices good choices in life and when we talk about social media it's a choice it isn't something that we necessarily have to consume or even utilize but i know that in today's age some of us have businesses some of us have practices we want to put ourselves out there as a way to advertise those kinds of things but we also have to remember that we have what's called self-regulation it's one of the characteristics of an emotionally intelligent person to utilize the idea of self-regulation to recognize when to turn it off and when to turn it off on because you do have free will choice of how much you let into your mental space now when we talk a little bit further about teenagers or preteens or those who are utilizing all of the media on a regular basis whether to communicate with their friends or to um feel a part of not to feel pressured that they don't belong to a certain class or a certain group we get into some very difficult nuances and a lot of you um pastor johnston and miss chambers you said a lot of things about the external things that we're supposed to be uh feeding our daughters or our children but i think that the one of the places that is a good place to start is also to help people with their inner self when you feel good on the inside that reflects on the outside no matter what you look like and one of the things that people don't recognize is how you think is how you feel how you feel is then how you will act behave and respond and it can't work in any way so the mind is the control center of just every aspect of your life so if internally you have a good self-esteem you feel good about yourself regardless of what you see on social media you know the difference between the boundaries of not allowing it to pull you in a certain direction or make you change your facial features or your put filters so that your body can look a certain way all of that starts within in terms of how you feel about yourself and how confident you are now i also want to address those who did not have the opportunity to have a good upbringing or mentors to help them to recognize that what you do on the inside reflects on the outside so they use social media as a way to guide their lives and govern what they think and how they feel and unfortunately there's been many bullying and uh depression and deaths as a result of what social media have put out there and i have had the unfortunate um you know experiences to deal with people who have gone through those things what i will really say to to this is that what we see out there is not real people will show you what they want you to see and if you get caught up in that then you're sucked in and you're constantly running a race a loo fighting a losing battle because you'll never win you have to get to the place where you make a choice about how much of that you're going to let into your mental space you have to make a choice about when it's time to say when i've been hearing a lot of celebrities have been shutting down their social media pages because they too understand how detrimental it has become to a lot of their lives because you get saturated into it that there's nothing else that matters so you gotta pull back like pastor johnson said she has to recognize when it's time to put it on you know put it on the table and when it's time to pick it up and utilizing self-regulation as a means to say we do have choices we don't always have to allow ourselves to become saturated by something that's not making us feel good switch off to something else sometimes you got to fix your mental space before you go scroll through social media and look at other people because it's just not going to be a good mix for you you know the christian community um it's a great place to find solace it's a good place for us to hopefully find support how do we tap into our christian community to help us relieve fear stress and anxiety right that we all feel all day long and dr percy helped me with that you know this is such a great community uh question and it kind of um even speaks to the question that you just asked about um young adults and social media because i was going to say that we have to as a faith community we have resources within our church especially within the adventist church since we're mostly adventists let me just even throw out even for our brinkle family we have beautiful girls it's about making sure that you are surrounded by people with positive images about you as a black lady young lady or as a black woman um surrounding yourself with um those who are able to encourage you to believe in yourself right um so there are resources in the church and also um you know um what about the fact that the book of proverbs talks about the fact that there is what wisdom and wise counseling sometimes people just need to accept that they need to see a counselor they need to get help um there's nothing wrong with that and i'm happy to see that in our society we are evolving now where there is more acceptance of people just saying you know i'm disturbed by what i see on social media um i i have a self-esteem problem um and going to get the help that they need especially in this time of the global pandemic a lot of people have been home right um no matter the age range and they have been online looking at social media a lot of people have had to occupy themselves with you know going online and viewing videos and and and reading articles because he can't go out we couldn't go to the movies or what have you a lot of places are opening up now but we know that for the past year a lot of people have had to spend their time online and what we're finding out is that it has impacted us tremendously so for example the american psychological association they just did a survey in the survey results came out earlier this month it actually showed that regardless of the age range we are finding that people were so stressed out and depressed that they put on weight any of you out there can relate to that you know i'm looking at the survey results right now because i wanted to be exact when i actually quote this it's finding the survey found that women 45 of women say that they have gained about 23 pounds and as we were talking earlier about young adults gen z's 52 of them put on 28 pounds and for millennials 48 of them put on about 40 pounds so that's from the stress so again for your point of view that i'm not sure the feedback is coming from but to your question about coping um going back to trying to find help from the um faith community we know in our church we have exercise programs that's the marvelous thing about a lot of churches so here in our church we have um an exercise program that they meet they run other churches have the same thing so we can we can become our own support system in in turning to the church utilizing the exercise programs even joining um a prayer a prayer group we have prayer ministries and a lot of churches have prayer ministries turn to your church family to say hey i need prayer you know join that prayer group join our women's ministries um group um such as the the wonderful one that we have right here at brinklow if you're a man men's ministry so there are resources in the church that we can't be afraid to utilize because we have been blessed to have a church family regardless of the church that you attend you have church families who are here you just need to ask for help and i think the support is there before we go to the congregation and take questions and we will do that shortly and please be thinking about your questions put them in the chat um or you can direct the questions um directly to this the panelists i do have one more question and that is around mental health there's a lot of discussion about mental health right now there's quite a bit of funding that is being directed to mental health issues you know some communities mental health even though just the thought of it it's a taboo to talk about in some communities i can tell you that in my african community it's not something that is easily discussed in our black community as well how how does this impact our mental health really all of this this all these issues around stress and anxiety um clearly it's it's a an issue that we need to grapple with and address and i'm going to start with i will have each of you address this um pastor johnston what are your thoughts i mean how do we how does this all impact our mental health because it's clearly an issue today and it's being talked about absolutely as dr percy um shared from a data perspective we are certainly seeing those effects i mean if you just bump into someone in the grocery store that you haven't seen for the last six months most of us are a little more uh puffy than we once were and it's because we're all trying to manage i think that um at this point in my congregation i have been having conversations with people who are not only just losing weight or experiencing depression but who are also having some challenges in marriages and with children who are not coping well and so i i i really believe um that as a nation we're going to have to do some sweeping um work with the mental health of our nation um because we're all being affected um and and not to mention those who are leading people from a distance you know it's been shared about pastors who are suffering um from depression because the way that we do church now is not the same um there's a statistic that's saying that something like 20 of people who were regular attenders of church have not intended anyone's church virtually or otherwise since the pandemic started and so there's a lot of people who are in leadership who are feeling like like failures because the way that we used to reach people is different so um i i really want to say that we all need to be um seeking out a christian therapist at this time we are all under it no matter how it is manifesting itself i think it's necessary i think it's basic protocol for every person um as a part of the united states uh and i'll say not to mention what's happening with social unrest and with the challenges that are happening around our black community the black diaspora i think we all have to be vigilant about our mental health right now yes indeed roxanne your thoughts you know um the truth is the situation that we find ourselves it is inevitable that it will affect us mentally i can speak for myself as a teacher and um as a mother of young children you get up each day and you motivate yourself but sometimes it seems as if you're going in a circle and you find that being in the house with the children and um as you say all these different videos coming in on your whatsapp and the students they are demotivated and it does take a toll on you and it does feel as if this thing is coming in on you and so once you are aware of that which everyone needs to be the next move is for you to be proactive and so i have taken some deliberate measures to um to take care of my mental health and that of my family you know i'm going outside at different points um i i i literally rearranged the home every day so we set up the home for classroom you have the ecd of the primary and all everybody have their corner and when school time is finished i rearrange back the home into a home because i don't want my family to feel as if we're working right through the day and and yes my um my my work station is in my bedroom but i put it out every night because at that point in time i need to feel like i am home we're home for church i go out with the children i mean we go to the beach and i sing the mighty power of god you know we do deliberate things i i enjoy programs like these because i'm telling you it is very electrifying to sit here to find out that what i am experiencing is what women are experiencing all over the world and just to listen to how different coping mechanism is very powerful and of course i i reach out to the lord you know um spur john made a statement he said that our aim is not to try not to be anxious but it's still a law our anxiety to drive us to our needs and we need to reach a point where you say lord you know this is how i'm feeling i am confused about this issue i i do not know what to do and he's going to respond to you because steps to christ tell us that there's no chapter in our life too dark that he doesn't read and it goes on to say that anything that in any way disturb our peace is of concern to him and so this is the moment to really reach out and the best way to treat your mental health is to help somebody reach out to somebody go go and call that old lady or that young mother that is struggling reach out to somebody and inspire them and best of all be patient with yourself be in tune with yourself and by then you can keep afloat because i believe that we're gonna make it we're gonna come through we just need to keep afloat because something is going to happen and it's going to happen starting with us and the change begin with us because how we endure this season will be the platform from which the younger generations spring off wow i want to start taking some questions that i'm seeing in the chat right now and um so the question one of the questions says um how what are some of the coping mechanisms to deal with pre-menopause and menopause and the accompanying symptoms now i'm not sure which of the four of you can answer this right now but i am going to start with dr percy i don't know anything i'm not at that stage of life yet so i don't know sorry okay who can answer that for us what are some of the coping mechanisms in fact it doesn't even have to be just pre-menopause and menopause what are some of the coping mechanisms that we can use today to deal with anxiety because you know even those two issues pre-menopausal menopause affects how we feel at our mental health and so forth what are some of the coping mechanisms for us well i think i'll take that i'll take a step at that um question um i think i think it's important um with regards to anxiety in general um uh miss chambers said it best when she talked about self-awareness um self-awareness is key you have to be key into yourself that you are experiencing these things and if you're not self-aware you can just continue to go and go and go and before long that anxiety turns into something else and it's now affecting not just your mental health but your physical health as well because if you didn't understand that stress that that old adage stress kills is really true and here's how it happened stress affects every aspect of our lives every single organ in your body is being affected and when i do my talks on stress a lot of people are just so amazed they didn't recognize the damage that they're doing to themselves internally when they um continue to experience stress on a prolonged basis and don't take the necessary steps towards making sure that they're either seeking help for their physical state mental state or both so with that being said with regards to dealing with the anxiety that you know that you're experiencing sometimes what happens is you're saying to yourself why am i constantly worried i wasn't worried like this before why am i constantly shaking or why am i responding to people in such a negative way when i always used to be such a positive person all of those questions are like a mental health self-check-in with yourself and you're asking yourself these questions because you recognize there's been a shift immediately when you recognize there's been a shift there are certain things that you need to shift within yourself your routine so whether it means that i used to sit at my computer for eight hours a day now i'm going to take an hour break each hour to get up and change the channel whether it means i'm going to go outside and breathe in fresh air i'm going to drink some water take a healthy snack whatever it means and if you feel like you still haven't gotten you know control of what you're experiencing then you need to take some more shifts what do i need to do differently well i've not been exercising i haven't exercised in a long time and i find myself not calling anyone because i don't feel like talking to anybody i'm isolated i'm withdrawn so now those are other clues those are other telltale signs that something is going on with you and i want to say with the previous question one of the things with regards to the stigma we as a society have to make it okay for all people not just black people but all people of all color and racist to say this is okay it's okay to not be okay and reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness it's a sign of strength and when we break down those barriers and those walls of just not allowing people especially people in the black community who have not been socialized that way they use the informal systems because that's how they've been taught i have many patients uh who are african-american and black will say to me my parents just sent me to pray or they told me just you know just don't worry it'll go away or you're not anxious you're not depressed you're just making this up and so being socialized that way you begin to think that if i do say i need help if i do seek professional help then something is wrong with me we need to put it out there to people that it is okay to seek help because god gives us the wisdom to seek the help that we need and so the woman who talked about you know her free menopausal or menopausal symptoms those can be exacerbated by stress and anxiety and other mental health disorders so just know that if you've worked with your primary care physician with regards to the symptoms you're experiencing and there are no organic causes for what your is because free menopause is a natural process it'll happen to every woman on this planet whether it happens now or later some people experience it earlier than others but you do first need to go talk with your primary care physician about some things you can use i'm a holistic person and there are a lot of holistic methods that you can utilize to lessen some of those symptoms and yes you will experience mental health challenges when you go into menopause in three minute cause so if you need to get a professional to work with how to manage my stress how to manage my anxiety how to manage the fact that i'm lashing out at everybody that i talk to now because i'm so stressed out because i'm in menopause then it's okay to talk to a professional about how to then uh be able to cope with some of those uh symptoms your experiences so i hope that helped thank you i like to ask anybody in the audience if you have some coping mechanisms you can suggest certainly let others know so unmute yourself and uh let us know what have worked for you well i've been there still there but um one of the i'm gonna address three different things real fast um i'm glad you mentioned my concern is the taboo about mental health and when we talk about the 40 million i mean was that dr percy that's the reported number my concern is for the unreported number among us among all people women and then men have mercy lord i can see during this pandemic that there are people many people are hurting right now and because of the taboo they're not going to say anything who do they talk to who do they reach out to they're not going to acknowledge i am ashamed you know that this is happening to me so the question would be how can we as a community you know address the those who are just too ashamed to come out right now because right now as we're speaking it's happening and then i want to talk about grief you know when i just came to brinkle i just lost my mom and i i noticed you talked about yes we can after a certain time you go to counseling etc etc for me it was just the church it for me it was just showing up to bring khloe every sabbath volunteering to teach a class volunteering to teach the children volunteering to be in the choir and somehow i just worked my way and if i said anything i was the holy spirit allowed somebody to affirm me so you you don't even have to be in the counselor's office with all your respect to the conspiracy but each of us can be there in love for each other you know what i mean and you they have no the many people who took me through that process they have no idea that they allowed me to go through grief by just being there saying the right thing and just be being loving on the sabbath day and and the third component for me menopause i discontinued their all dairy products meat and dairy i discontinued i increased my walking and then i also increased i love i love to write and read i increased the things that made me feel okay and i do believe i was also using herbal if um some herbal things it doesn't work for everyone each of us our bodies are so different we have to identify our individual needs desires concerns and be able to address it appropriately so those were three things but i wanted somebody to address the the silent ones who are suffering right now and are not coming out now can we get to that thank you so much anybody else uh charlene it looks like you're saying something but you are muted okay can you hear me now yes we can okay my question deviates just a little as a black woman an adventist who believe in the second coming of christ but also i understand that i have to live until he gets here how do i build my legacy doing and do manage all of this at the same time how do i good question anyone johnston any thoughts lots of them um i i i do recognize that um this current season is challenging for those of us who have a 10 20 and 30 year plan but i recognize that with every downturn in every uh major fallout in american history there were individuals who stayed dialed in to their final goal and took steps toward it so i wonder um with those of us who have these dreams that god has given us uh the importance for me has been to take steps every day toward it and to arrange my life in such a way that those steps um are addressed i was blessed to start a company during the pandemic and um actually reaching out to start it and to put those building blocks blocks in place has been one of the ways that my mental health has been safeguarded because in moments where i would be ruminating about what has been lost ruminating about the difference differences in my congregation i've been placing that energy and something i'm passionate about so i believe that there is still room there's still space to build legacy and to keep in mind the things that are important over time and i believe that if god has given it to us it will also be relevant and meaningful right now um so so yeah i think it that this is a great time to continue building legacy and real quick is it ever too late to start absolutely not absolutely not if you have the idea in mind um and you still have breath in your body it's time um you know there's just too many uh too many examples of people who have started on legacy if you've ever watched um the movie the black panther there is a beautiful woman who is a part of the cast who's something like 85 or 86 years old and this is her first movie role she had lived an entire life and now 85 she's a movie star and has been cast in roles from there i think that we give age too much credence if you have the breath in your body and the idea there is funding there's inform especially now there is information and so many methods to get your id off the ground it is never too late to start you know something i would say to you as a a 30-year entrepreneur which i've been for the last 30 years it's never too late to start and there are so many women who have started during this time because they found some down time to rethink and reinvent themselves so if you have something in mind any one of you um don't hesitate to start and there are a lot of resources out there to guide you to empower you to support you i'm a proponent and an incredible support of women starting something of their own because you have the ability to do so and i i i get up every day and i say lord you've gifted me to do this and i'm going to go do it so i would say if that's a burning platform for you go do it anybody else any other question i don't have a question but i have a comment um one thing that i have done during this particular time to relieve stress is um somehow we have a group of us from high school who were not in touch for 30 odd years have come together and these are people all over the world what we do is we meet every month we celebrate birthdays we have parties we dress up and we have virtual parties we um and it's funny that god has provided these people for me all of them are christian people so there is you know we we have something in common and so every month we um we celebrate a birthday if there's a birthday there's not a birthday we have a meeting and we talk about things from way back and this has been so you know electrifying and and consoling and just so good for me i when when it's time for this i i it's like i'm going out on a date you know and and it it just ends that it just makes you uh give you a different perspective and and bring you back to things that you usually make you very happy so you know if anybody thinks i'm not crazy they can you know just try getting back to you know somebody who you knew from way back having these kind of talks these kind of you know forming these relationships and i'm telling you it is very satisfying and i make a comment if i could add to where maxine won i know from my family we started something where once the pandemic started we started well our mom was sick too we started a prayer thing but then we did a tuesday bake off because one sibling lives in ireland somewhere in jamaica some of us are here in the u.s so we are kind of scattered and we will just meet sometime we cook my poor sister in ireland she's five hour six hour time difference so when we're going she's up at 1am you know to but sometime we cook sometimes we just talk and i find that even as a family because i if we're honest with each other as life happens we some you know we get busy but just scratching out that time has just built our relationship and it has helped us and we are educators also and now some of us have to transition to work and we don't have the time so we shift it a little so that's something else to as we go through let us be flexible you know realizing that some things are for a season or something has to transition in a different way and if we are open and not become so rigid and understand these i think it will help us go along and reach out to each other but do things i i am a strong believer in taking time out for me i used to say to my family friday night is god night saturday's church and sunday is my day you might not be able to do all of that but just find time also for you because a healthy mom is a healthy wife and a healthy mother if charlene is healthy if charlene takes care of charlene then she'll be the best charlene i'll be the best teacher for my student i'm just better at that can i add to what charlene just said and what maxine just said because i'm glad they are raising the points that they did because sometimes we talk about technology from a negative perspective social media from a negative perspective i hear both of them are basically telling us that you can use it to support you and to encourage you um in these times of uncertainty and so i just want to strongly encourage those of us who are listening or to even share it with your friends and family that you know you can use zoom this technology that we're using this afternoon to connect to to others right to inspire you and to empower you because when i look at the data and as a social scientist yes i have to look at data when i look at the data it is concerning to me that the data when it comes to how we're affected by the pandemic and life after what we're expecting blacks are reporting more concern about the future than any other race more than half of black people are saying that they do not feel comfortable with going back to living life the way that they used to before the pandemic but even more concerning is that more black people 57 are saying that they don't they're not comfortable adjusting to that one-on-one interaction that we once had before the pandemic they're not comfortable with one-on-one interaction after the pandemic ends and so that's why why i'm saying that we need a support system within our church within our larger community with our friends and our family because people need to feel comfortable enough you know we have to have the dialogue started so people can say i need help i don't know how to adjust to life after the pandemic um and we know for example that women are are overwhelmed by the pandemic right um i talked earlier about how women are disproportionately affected and the same survey that i'm i'm talking about with from the american psychological association it said that mothers are more likely than fathers to have mental health problems worsen since the pandemic and when you look at at the survey um from social sciences you're seeing that only 24 percent of people overall have gotten help with their mental health issues during the pandemic so this use of technology that charlene and maxine are talking about it's very very important that we stay connected we stay connected during these times so that we have the support system that we need to continue with life after the epidemic if i if i may add you know to what my sister and um madam percy just said you know i shared this thought with my students and um it it keeps coming back to me i'm reminded of the experience of the israelites when they were brought into captivity and they were being carried away from jerusalem on to babylon and you know they they felt so discouraged i mean they were uprooted from their school environment from their home environment and it appeared as if all hope was lost and the lord sent a message to jeremiah and you would think that this message would be included like you know just don't do anything just stay still until things clear but that's not what god told him he said to them listen build a house dwelling them plant gardens eat the fruit of of of your labor take wife beget sons and then the platform on which he gave them the authority to do that was the very familiar verse that all of us embrace in jeremiah 29 verse 11 4 i know the plans i have for you said the lord plans of peace and not of evil to give you an unexpected end and i realized that for myself as a mother and all the different roles sometimes you wonder does it make sense to invest does it make sense charlene to build a legacy does it make sense to start a business no i mean should i just be dormant and the word of the lord is saying that listen you are to be more even more fervent than before um in the book ministry of healing ellen white says listen the faithful discharge of today's duty is the best preparation for tomorrow and so now is not the time for us to give in to despair now it's not the time for us to throw up our hands you know no it's not the time for us to hold back it's a time for us to be more diligent you know to to embrace the opportunity of being close to your family and close to your children and at the same time using the social media etc to influence others worldwide because at the end of the day god has the big plan and he's not holding back he's not failing and so that's where we should put our anxiety and our fears that it propels us to challenge god to even do greater things for us that calls for amen that is awesome absolutely right anybody else to share comment i have a comment or maybe a question as i listen to the um the idea of meeting like charlie no saying on maxine and and um herman one of the questions are you are we feeling comfortable enough to ask the question of our family members and our friends and our church members are you doing okay everything all right i go back to the question about those who are feeling um ashamed and the taboo about i'm not doing okay could you be that one person this week who can reach out to somebody that you're a little concerned about to just pose the question whether it's in your family or wherever are you really doing okay i'm a little concerned about the fact that you've not been answering your phone every time i call or we have not seen much of you etc etc whichever way you but that's my that's my concern somehow as i lost my other concern is the vaccine we are people of course we as a people of color we know the statistics we've seen them we've heard them we have lived them i'm walking in my community and bold enough this morning in my sabbath school two weeks ago i said to my sibling school members because most of us are beyond a certain age and those people don't say that we're afraid to ask certain questions so i said two weeks ago are we all vaccinated and this morning it was very interesting everybody in the class said we have a report for you i wasn't doing it for that but they felt so committed to the fact that i even asked the question that everybody's about to have a second dose in the next week or two and these are the kind of issues now that yes in the space that we find ourselves in this week this is still a very deadly thing and we have to decide if you're not taking the vaccine if you get sick there is also this plasma antibody you get a one hour infusion within a day or within 10 days of being diagnosed and you're fine and ready to go but it is still a deadly thing among us and this is something else that we we should be mindful of we need to encourage i encourage my every single member of my family about two months ago do this or do what i know everybody has been vaccinated because it's do this or do what that's a really good question and what i'm hearing you say is do we have the permission to now uh ask questions that may sound invasive or used to sound invasive i'm to people are we doing that are we our brothers and sisters keeper yeah ngozi is it okay if i just jump in i like that um miss shakes jumped in there and uh talked about are you okay there's actually a program that has gone worldwide since its origin in australia that was called just that are you okay are the letter u okay and the way it came about is an australian family lost their father to suicide and they didn't realize that the father was actually depressed and going through all of this burden that experience and eventually took his life and as a result of what happened this family began this program right there where they were about checking in on others and if you have time look it up it's called are you okay and it has spread in that we need to recognize that we are our brother's keeper we are responsible for each other and sometimes we get you know just so bogged down in our own silos for for whatever reason we're all busy we're dealing with life we're dealing with work we're dealing with all kinds of our own situations and we forget that we also have a responsibility to check in on each other and i myself put myself in a situation that i'm not good with the phones i'm not good with calling people because i'm so from one task to the next throughout my day but what i make it a habit to do is i make it a habit to check in on my friends my you know my my relatives whoever the case may be even if it's through a text message even it's through an encouraging word each and every day what i do is when i read a word and it stands out for me i have a community of people that i share that word with because i want you to feel the same way i've just felt just by reading this and even if i'm not the person that can pick up the phone and call you and have a long conversation with you i want you to know that i'm here and i'm checking on you because it is our responsibility to check on each other and if somebody says i need to talk to you then i have to make it that 9-1-1 and carve out some time to say okay i've got to call this person because they really need me so the ru okay is one of those things that we can all incorporate in our own lives and say to people are you okay is it okay for me to contact you what do you need from me i think a good question to ask people because sometimes they don't want you to say things to them they just want you to listen and listening can make such a difference in people's lives so asking people how can i help what do you need from me is a very very important question and i will say this don't be afraid to ask someone are you thinking about harming yourself that is a very important question because you know we shy away from that question and we don't recognize that we miss the boat people need for us to not just hear them but also see them and sometimes they don't feel seen and the moment you say to that person are you thinking about harming yourself that person knows that now i now have the permission to open up and talk about this whereas if i didn't then it will mean that nobody sees me nobody understands and nobody cares so i'm glad that you brought that up on miss shakes about are you okay because it is an actual program that i think i challenge all of us to make that a regular part of what we do to ask someone the question dr proctor i'm i'm really glad to hear about that program i will be researching that um and i also want to add a little bit of information about a program called mental health first aid it's like um cpr for the heart it's um what we do for the mind and it is a program for anyone especially i encourage ministry leaders to take this class they learn the symptoms to look for in our family our loved ones our co-workers and our neighbors and anyone around us um it sets off a red flag in our minds that something's not quite right and then we can intercede and and help and connect that person with the right resources to hopefully prevent something like suicide and it is good for us to ask that question we are our neighbors keeper our brothers and our sisters keeper and um it is a must that we stay and touch you know while the pandemic we we can all agree that it has done some devastating things in our country our families in the world but at the same time like charlene was saying and others it has done some wonderful things you know this is a maybe a transition period is a period where god has said you know you need to be still for a while you need to stop and hear my voice i'm not really crazy about the way we had to stop but you can agree that it has given us some time to really sit back and evaluate if we have taken that time and to look at what is needed maybe changes in my own life changes in the way i relate to my family i have truly enjoyed being able to be home i've been blessed to be able to be home and to collect my paycheck and to do my work with my husband right here doing the same thing our relationship has solidified so i not only want us to look at those things that have been negative um they are they need consideration but those things that are positive we've been in touch with people that maybe we haven't been in touch with in a long time and i love the thought of um the data you know that um herma dr percy brought up and and realizing that this is not going away the side effects of what we're experiencing now are gonna be with us for a long time i even noticed a change in my grandchildren four and two and a half years old um even at that age how this pandemic this time of isolation has negatively affected them so we have to keep our eyes open and we have to be willing to to go the course to to be there in the long run because this is not going away i know in my practice i do a clinical consultation or cigna in my practice what god has done for me um during the pandemic is to embolden me to go beyond the norm to go beyond the regular assessment and to ask the question so this is where the space i'm working in right now god has allowed me to be able to do that i'm not the one who is going to do that part of the consultation but at least god is allowing me to identify the need and if they say no if you ask the question and they say yes and if you ask the other question if you're okay they say no and if you ask the other question are you thinking of harming yourself and they say yes don't get scared because if god allowed you to ask that ques embolden you to ask the question the spirit of god will allow you to stay calm don't get excited and you know just pass them on to the right resource so god will take your hand you don't you know you don't have to be a counselor really but god can use each of us because this is this is truly a space in which we are encountering so much more of depression and anxiety and suicide it's a reality okay and we just want to ask god to give us what we need to support each other can i just um let me just say one thing ladies it's it's after two o'clock and i'm enjoying this conversation please don't get me wrong and we can continue on i just want to have your permission to continue on and be respectful of your time so um charlene if you go ahead and ask your question and dr percy you do the same and then let's try to wrap up if we need to okay okay well i thank you just not just a question i want you to go where kathleen was and as we talked about you know now we're on hubo and um about everything that's happening i think something very important because our time has changed like it is never and we'll never go back to things as normal but i find that if we start appreciating some of the things and when we talk to individuals see some of the positive like we are now back in school not happy don't like how it rolled out but as one of my co-worker was going i stopped and i said stop and think about it for a minute when in our lifetime did we everything as an educator in the public school system in middle school we would have worked from home for a year and she paused and i said think about all the stuff we were able to do and i think if we start um appreciating the little things in the middle of the thorn you know sometimes and there's a lot of thorn i know i'm like i want to dress up look i got dressed up today i i haven't done this you know and we want to do all of that but i think if we realize it's a mindset and if we start appreciating something especially for us people of color and if we start we will realize that our mood change a shift happens because we can't change it so we're going to have to figure out how to work within it how then to still be able to talk to audrey and still be safe so we have to make that adjustment where we have to start stepping out a little we can't just lock up in a yes we're a mask wash your hands even just standing outside and talking to her at the fence but make a little adjustment and be appreciative of what we were able to do i never thought i'd be home from school and got paid for almost a year my clothes got a break shoes got a car got a break you know it's just i'm just saying just a little things as we try to work a lot of time we focus on the thorns and we miss the rose in the middle of everything that's happening and i just want to say thanks can i just after percy oops um thanks i wanted to go back to a point that um sister coleman made about um some of the positive things about covid that we need to look at because you are so right we do talk about the negative things and you know you mentioned and i totally agree with you that some of the things that um resulted from the pandemic is the fact that we've been able to connect with long-last long-lost relatives and friends and um being able to slow down but if i could add one more one more to that and that is since we are now slowing down or have slowed down and since we have the technology that we're using more to connect to others well let's use the same to connect even more to christ now is a time for us to be able to read more about his word because for many of us we no longer have to commute to work right and some of us would commute an hour or two each day well can we use that particular time to now read more about him you know in the past we would say we don't have time because with the hustle and the bustle well now we have a little more time that we can carve out and i just think it's very important especially when we're talking about fear and anxiety now is the time for us to begin to start memorizing some of those scriptures you know growing up um my parents taught us as kids to memorize scripture so that as we go through life we can always call back to some scriptures and i know sister you for shakes you are about to join into this chorus with memorizing psalm psalm 27 and psalm 23 and psalm 46 god is our refuge and strength a very present help in the time of trouble these are the times and i think god is slowing us down to say you know read my word as well with all the benefits that you're seeing with kovitz put me in there too so that as you now go through life after the pandemic you can call upon me without having to read the word find it it's here it's here and we can bring it up um so i just want us to to be able to realize that the support we need the help we need for fear anxiety that's also in his word and we need to make sure that we are reading it so that we can recall it in those times of need amen i think i saw miss peters trying to say something earlier and i saw another hand miss forester can we just agree that those are the last two people we're going to take and then you know yeah i just um wrote it we're seeing a lot of um millennials in their 20s that are suffering from depression and they're it's it's more difficult to get them to see counseling and i mean we've i know of several one is almost say many right now and if we got a list of of um resources where they could be referred that they would make the phone calls because they're not taking it from the parents or from the relatives so um or if there was something that could be set up where um somebody could recommend a name that could be reached out help there there are a lot of them that aren't you know you mentioned earlier they aren't attending any church services they aren't these are kids that used to be in church so um we need help i actually didn't have my hand up but since i'm giving the um opportunity um i was just talking to a friend yesterday and i said how elaborate god's plans can be this pandemic may not have been orchestrated by him however he has used it to create this elaborate plan for us to recognize that you know this is something that nobody else could do nobody else could close down the world put the world at a standstill this has happened therefore the positive things that we can take out of this are the things that have benefited us especially that um have led us closer to him because for me personally i have had um a prayer group i have been to church every sabbath i have you know the things that i you know i have been reading um 52 weeks um to to finish the the bible i have done so many things that i never had the time to do before i was never at this place in my life before when it comes to my relationship with god and i just hope that this we see this as an opportunity and if we didn't start now because what is happening now even if it changes tomorrow even if it stops tomorrow life has changed life has totally changed it's not going back the way we knew it so um you know i'm not saying that i'm happy for the pandemic but i'm saying that the outcome for me has been more positive than negative thank you so much i want to say that this is an inflection point for all of us an inflection point for us to reflect on what this kobe 19 has brought both good and bad it's an opportunity for us to pivot and do something different an inflection point demands that we do something different that we aspire to get beyond where we are today otherwise um we won't make it and where we have been is not going to be where we end up this moment in time requires us to shift and we have got to shift and a lot of people are doing that um miss peters i just want to answer the question regarding the young people talk about a moment to pivot at my church we just started two forums one for teenagers that we call teen talk and another for young adults and for almost a year they never connected with each other and now we just launched this about a month ago and every friday night is for the young adults and saturday afternoon is is for the teenagers they are clamoring to join because it's an opportunity for them to dialogue with one another it's a space that we've created for them i can't even join because my daughter is uh joined so she shuts down if mommy isn't in the forum so it's been an opportunity to reinvent ourselves reinvent programs and pivot and do something totally different so this should be looked at as both an opportunity yes we've had some difficulties but it's also an opportunity to do something different so i have enjoyed this enjoyed the session today we're talking about fear anxiety stress all those emotions are real in all of our lives but the lord that we serve the god of impossibilities has also made way for us to overcome them and we have chatted about these things today audrey this has been great for me personally i hope it has been great for those of you who joined you probably need to schedule a part two where we have another time to chat but i want to say thank you so much to each of you for joining today i want to especially thank the panelists pastor johnston thank you so much for being a part of this dr percy thank you for joining us dr hastings proctor thank you for joining us mrs chambers i appreciate your wisdom thank you for joining us as well so ladies i hope this was informative and insightful for you and i look forward to talking to you guys again thank you so much for being a part of this thank you oh thank you all so much for staying with us i know that we all have enjoyed this program we have to go now because of course we have other things that we had planned in our day but god has given us wisdom he's given us people who know things that can help us and is willing to share with us so let's all do our part to help everyone around us to feel supported and not alone at this time we'll close our prayer with kathleen can you close first please kathy father god it has been good to spend this time together and this time with you we're so thankful dear lord for what we have been reminded of we are thankful for how you have blessed us through our speakers our speaker and through the panelists the words of wisdom that have been shared truly must have come from on high we are now challenged to stay together to watch over our family our neighbors to be sure everybody's okay we don't want to lose a needless life we want our youth especially to understand that we are with them we are behind them we love them and we want to help father as women of emanuel brinklow help us to meet this challenge help us father by giving us the strength that we need to reach out to each other to be your hands your feet your eyes your ears your mouthpiece bless us in a special way thank you so much for the life of esther and what she has taught us through what she did for her people may we be esther's today's esther to the others um the other women in emmanuel brinklow in our community um men women and children alike use us father to finish your work so that you can hurry up and come and rescue us from this sinful world it is our greatest desire to be with you throughout eternity so lord when you come please find a place for each of us in your kingdom thank you for each one who has been listening and blessed them in a special way and we thank you for hearing and answering our prayer in jesus name amen amen i just want to say thank you to our communications team for really having us use this platform without age we thank you so much for this day appreciate it [Music] good morning happy sabbath and happy women's day brinklo family i am lynette yancy robinson representing brinkleo cares and your grocery grab and go committee with a reminder that grocery grab and go is tomorrow march 28th at 11 30 a.m you can pick up food for your friends and neighbors and at 7 00 a.m we are requesting volunteers um today is women's day and we're celebrating everything black girl magic however at 7 a.m tomorrow we need manpower so if you're available and you can come out and help us get set up unload vehicles that would be awesome and then at 8 00 a.m we need help with sorting we need about four to five people to come and help prepare bags at 10 a.m we need two to three people to help load vehicles and then at 11 a.m we need help with clean up so at each of those time slots we need about two hours of your time it's fun it's fulfilling and we're looking forward to seeing you if you're interested in volunteering please contact me lynette yancy robinson or glenda roberts see you tomorrow have a great day [Music] [Music] you

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Id: 6uaWLB3lKM4

Length: 181min 0sec (10860 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 27 2021