BRIAN "HEAD" of KORN & DAUGHTER JENNEA SHARE TRAUMA... SELF ABUSE... and RELATION$#!T #INSIDEOFYOU

tumblr and whatever people would post and so me and my friends all were in broken homes and whatnot and so we would we would talk about cutting and burning the flag lighters and stuff it was almost like a competition like oh yeah well my life sucks so I did this and I wrote fat on my on my thigh and oh yeah well my dad yelled at me yesterday you know I'm saying like I was like Brian letting you do whatever you sort of wanna did he have like no there are no guidelines no discipline like be home by 10:00 did you have to be home at 10:00 our life was kind of crazy like there were we would travel and stuff and I I would be on the road with him when he went sorry let me backtrack when he left corn he started a solo project Brian had Walsh ban and then later was love and death and they would play shows at bars and little clubs and stuff and I would I would go on the road and be doing homework at like 3 a.m. so my life was a little different in that way I would say like he tried to be strict and be like the dad and whatever but our life was too inconsistent that it didn't it wasn't there she didn't have it wasn't like we lived in a town and her friends were in town and she could go and then hang out till 10 it was like hey we're going on the road this month next month dad I want to go to Phoenix and visit my friends cuz we just live in Phoenix and so I'd flyer out there and talk to the parents so they're gonna be good and then you know and then she got into some stuff that way but when did she start lashing out when was it like you know the whole I hate you I'm tired of you when did you know like you got to step up how do you sit there and say hey you need help when you're the one who needed help for so long and how does that give you any kind of validity right was she always questioning that she was questioning a lot what do you think thirteen and a half or something yeah I would say um when I hit 7th grade I really started to hurt you know I really started to experience the pain of things but yeah I started to I think voice a and lash out and really self-harm when I was 13 and were you devastated by this yeah totally because I you know I tried to discipline her but like I'd say give me your phone you're not gonna have it for a couple days and then she'd say okay I'm doing my homework now I'm doing it and then she would do it and say come on I did it I'm not gonna do it no more and she would say please you know like Bart Simpson keeps repeating him yeah okay you don't remember that well I would never hold the discipline yeah I was a good manipulator yeah and this is hard because at a time you felt like you you've got a left at all you want to raise your daughter you're having this relationship well I guess this is at this point when did you leave the ban in 2005 2005 and you kind of rejoin like that [ __ ] started you started touring with them a little later right yeah like eight years later when she was 14 almost 15 so it was a long time I know it's kind of it's crazy story right it's it is crazy it's hard to keep up with the timeline yeah and it's just like you know you have it's especially like when you you found yourself and you found God and all these things and then you have a daughter that's acting out and then she's you know she wants attention and she's suffering and she's hurting and it's like again how do you not fall back into that you know like I kind of did this for you in a way but you understand fully what she's doing and why she's doing it and these were her feelings and she's had these deep so it's very I mean it probably takes a lot of therapy where you guys going to therapy together we we tried therapy yeah she wasn't really having it and well I feel like kids in sorry I mean cutting you off I feel like kids who have attachment issues therapy doesn't work because bonding is scary and and the only reason the only reason you would you would tell your feelings to someone or the only reason they would want to know is because they want something from you it's not just because they care about you and so therapy scared me and why would I tell this woman that I don't even know all these things that happen to me and and what if she what if she snitches on me you know what if I tell her something and then I get in trouble you know and so it just it just didn't work and did you feel like you were absolutely a hundred percent honest with her yeah no I mean I tried to be but you know what I did I carried around so much that that self-hatred I had when I was growing up it was and then I couldn't get together had so much rage and anger problems and I remember she said one day she was like I said I'm sorry you know cuz I blew up and she's like you're not sorry if you're sorry you wouldn't keep doing it but that's you don't Stan I can't stop doing I can't control myself my anger sometimes you know how bad I want to I want to but she couldn't comprehend it at 40 she's probably thinking well if you can't control yourself and if you can't why are you telling me to control myself yeah like she didn't respect when I would say okay you're gonna do this or did it as a parent it's like she didn't respect that because I was such a mess you know it was like we're brother older brother and sister something right and she just wanted a dad in a way right I mean in a lot of ways and I'm just all I had was the the massive love for her everything else discipline and and I just didn't have I didn't have sorry no I could see you're getting emotional now while you're getting up doctor talk to me about that sorry no I think it's important well I think from the from the start just you you don't really when you go through trauma like that like being being left alone with skinheads and your mom abandoned to you and leaves you as a 16 year old and her boyfriend at 4 days and your dad comes home and you you know you have from about the house to house it takes years and layers to like really heal from that

Channel: Inside Of You Clips

Views: 6,273

Rating: 4.9223299 out of 5

Keywords: inside of you, iou, inside of you podcast, michael rosenbaum, michael rosenbaum podcast, smallville, smallville podcast, Korn, Head, Brian Welch, Jennea Welch, Loud Krazy Love, Korn Podcast, Korn Interview, Sobriety interview, anxiety, mental health, mental health podcast, tigerbelly, tigerbelly clips, bobby lee, bobby lee podcast, theo von, about last weekend, joe rogan, joe rogan podcast, jre, fatk, fighter and the kid, bryan callen

Id: LXrhC4F_aow

Length: 5min 50sec (350 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 28 2020