Biblical Manhood - Voddie Baucham

it's my honor to introduce our next speaker dr. vodi Baucom vody comes from a came from Houston Texas today that's where he and his family are located Bodie is a world-renowned speaker he speaks at conferences he's a pastor he's a biblical teacher he's got some books out on a table I'm reading family driven faith right now it's outstanding and he's an amazing man of God I've heard him speaking some different venues before and I think you're gonna be really blessed he said we talk about biblical manhood and womanhood and I think you're gonna learn a lot so let's woken up Bodie oh good evening to teach you folks in Western Kentucky little something about Texas hospitality good evening that was much better it's good to be here tonight I have been excited about this for quite some time I'm always excited to be in the presence of paul Washer just a man that I've always admired greatly and man who is becoming a dear friend and in these days where the gospel is so polluted it is refreshing and encouraging and challenging to hear a man proclaim it without apology and with incredible clarity and passion and boldness and it is what we desperately need in our day it's interesting you know that Paul talked about the Puritans and the influence of the writing of the the Puritans and his own life and one of the things that really is knit our hearts together is that same influence in my life of the writings of the Puritans in a number of areas but specifically in the areas of the applications of the gospel to everyday life and the application of gospel theory of biblical manhood biblical womanhood and the family there are two sides of my life there is the one side which is the professional side that you heard a little bit about this evening where I serve as a pastor and as a professor and a my my area of specialty is area of cultural apologetics apologetics just a fancy word that means the defense of the faith comes from the Greek word apologia which is used in first Peter chapter 3 when Peter says that we're to always be ready to give an answer to anyone who asks us the reason for the hope that is within us and that that word for the reasoned response that we're to give as apologia and from that word we get our word apologetics and so it's giving a reasoned response for why it is we believe what we believe cultural apologetics the term really popularized by Francis Schaeffer and it's the idea of applying that discipline to contemporary cultural issues so that's the one side of my life the other side of my life is a place where I am Bridget's husband and jasmine and Trey and Elijah and Asher's father and the father of all of the other arrows yet to come and it is in the place where those two areas merged together where I've been spending a lot of my time lately where cultural apologetics meets the biblical understanding of manhood and womanhood and and the family from a biblical theological perspective because I believe the culture has sold us a bill of goods as it relates to what manhood is as it relates to what womanhood is and as it relates to what the family is we've been lied to hoodwink bamboozled okay.we and we've been sold a bill of goods as it relates to the biblical family and what it is to be a man was this would be a woman we just don't get it we don't know tonight we'll look at biblical manhood tomorrow we'll look at biblical womanhood but again it's something that we have failed to understand in a biblical context just like these issues of the gospel these things that are clear in the scriptures but because we've heard the polluted versions so often and for so long the truth is almost foreign to us it is that way as well when it comes to these ideas of biblical manhood and womanhood and we'll see that as we journey through our time together over these next couple of days when looking at biblical manhood I want us to go back to the beginning I want us to look in the book of Genesis if you will open your Bibles with me to Genesis chapter 2 in Genesis chapter 1 we have creation overview in Genesis chapter 2 slow down a little bit and rather than just a general synopsis we get some more specifics about creation and specifically about the creation of man and woman and we see this here beginning at verse 15 I want us to see this here in Genesis chapter 2 and verse 15 and remember this is before the fall this is before corruption has entered in not long before because it doesn't take long for corruption later and for the fall to enter in but this is what it looks like in perfection this is not what it looks like when it's marred and it's being restored it's interesting we're now looking at the other side of the coin we've looked at this picture of God bringing about restoration of God recreating man if you will through this process of salvation this process of regeneration but now we're going to look at the other side of the coin we're gonna look at this picture of perfection we're gonna look at man in his pristine form and what we see there just might surprise you because again we've been sold a bill of goods look with me beginning in verse 15 of chapter 2 of Genesis the Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and keep it and the Lord God commanded the man saying you may surely eat of every tree of the garden but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die verse 18 then the Lord God said it is not good for the man to be alone I love that verse I really do Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone I just have this picture of my mind that God created man and there's Adam and God looks at Adam and says and we're gonna make it by itself I will make him a helper fit for him so out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them we just pause here for a moment every type of animal that God had created he brought before this man and this man named them all we don't have minds like that anymore can you imagine that naming all the animals any a you couldn't just go that's four legged upright crawling thing because there's a whole bunch of those you know each one of these he named that's the kind of mind this man had and even with a mind like that God said wasn't good for him to be alone and whatever the man called every living creature that was its name the man gave names to all the livestock and the birds of the heavens and very beast of the field but for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him so the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up the place with flesh and the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man then the man said this is at last bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh she shall be called Esau because she was taken out of each in the Hebrew it's a beautiful picture that's painted there by the words that he uses she should be called woman because she was taken out of man she should be called a shot because she was taken out of each that that she's she's mine she's part of me next verse therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast asked to his wife and that shall become one flesh and the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed and here is this beautiful picture of man in pristine conditions and there are some things that are present here that some may find surprising and as it relates to biblical manhood these things are absolutely essential if a man wants to call himself a man from a biblical perspective these things have to be in place now unfortunately out at first we got to do some deep programming here I want you to understand what has happened to us we define manhood you know it has been said by the three B's okay we define manhood on the ball field in the bedroom and by the billfold in our culture that's how we've been taught to define manhood on the ball field in the bedroom and by the billfold that's it how does he perform athletically how does he perform sexually how is he with the ladies and how much money does he have that's how we define manhood in our culture whether we like it or not and unfortunately for those of us who claim to be followers of Christ and in large part because of what we've just heard our definitions are no different we define manhood by the three B's and the homeschool follower father of four my oldest son is not with me today he travels with me I tell him about eight days a month any less and be hard for me to feed my family anymore be hard for me to say with a straight face if they're the most important thing in my world but I about eight days a month and my oldest son travels with me he does that full-time from the time my oldest son became 13 years old I became his teacher when he was 13 went through a manhood ceremony and one of the parts of that entering into manhood was his mother turned over the books and I became his teacher of all of his subjects and more particularly more specifically his disciple he is my disciple there is no man in the world that it's warm Fortin for me to disciple than my son and so as a result of that he spends his time traveling with me and the interesting thing about that is I get a lot of questions several questions I get you know people look at me and they go you know you pretty big I look like you maybe you know your ball player or something like that so yeah yeah yep yeah I've been there done that okay it's great you know our son you know he's 14 he's you know pretty pretty big kid and I'm just wondering you know with you guys doing this how is he gonna play ball when people say that to me here's what I hear ah I want to know how your son is going to be able to worship at the altar of the sport God to which I respond who cares I don't it's meaningless it's absolutely meaningless we don't need another ballplayer we don't we need men with trained minds we need men with godly biblical character we need men with multi-generational vision we need men who commit themselves and all their faculties to the glory of Almighty God I am raising a warrior for Christ that's what I'm raising not an entertainer that's not what I'm raising a warrior for Christ who cares well you know team sports they build character really do you really believe that do you really believe that because if you believe that let's test your premise team sports build character that means guys who spend more time in team sports ought to have more character than guys who don't so the guys in this culture with the greatest character ought to be in the NFL in the NBA is that your final answer that's ridiculous it's absolutely ridiculous besides that how did George Washington build character in play team sports Adams I'll go you one better huh Jesus built character hmm was it Pop Warner see we think like that what why cuz how do you measure manhood according to our culture the ballfield the bedroom and the billfold that's how you measure manhood according to our culture and that's how we've learned to measure manhood does I mean I think sports do evil or that I didn't say that that's not what I said that's not what I said but once we step back for a moment and ask ourselves some questions we realize that not only is that a limited understanding of what a man is but it also doesn't come close to approaching scriptural truth what is a man and here's what's even less fortunate there are women walking around some of you in this very room and you'll be married in the not-too-distant future and our culture has said to you you measure manhood by what the ballfield the bedroom the billfold and that's what you're looking for claiming that you're following Christ but what you're looking for in a man is not a reflection of biblical manhood and biblical character but a reflection of our carnal culture cup of what that marriage do you think you're gonna have how long is the ball field going to satisfy you ladies we don't get to do that long how long is the billfold gonna satisfy you ladies cuz certainly all women with rich husbands are constantly happy you're right along the bedroom going to satisfy you ladies hmm so if that's the measure that our culture has given us no wonder those who look for that and a man end up with disillusionment quickly but if it's not that then what is it three things we see here even before the fall three things that a man must be committed to if he's going to reflect biblical manhood at least these three and this is the minimalist version here all right we could we could go into a lot more than this but this will encompass all that we need to understand for here and for now three things number one he must be committed to God honoring labor he must be committed to God honoring labor God does not abide lazy men and neither should we you can't say hey man you ought to say ouch he must be committed to God honoring labor ladies tonight well I'm going to do for you ladies as I'm going to speak to you as a father okay I have a 17 year old daughter we talk about these things a lot my primary goal in my 17 year old daughter's life is preparing her and partnering with her to see to it that she has a biblically qualified well suited mate for marriage my number one goal in my 17 year old daughter's life it's my job to protect her from unqualified worthless men it's my job as her father and tonight ladies I'll do that for you just for the time that we have together all right I will play that role for you tonight I will treat you like I treat my own daughter and I say to my own daughter do not abide a lazy man don't look twice at a lazy man if he is not committed to God honoring labor he is not worthy of your hand in marriage I will not I will not authorize that marriage I'm not signing off on it matter of fact I refuse to allow that kind of man to get close enough for my daughter to even become interested in him well are you gonna do that you know when she goes out on these dates and she just she goes out on what find that one in the text find it in the text find that concept the modern American dating concept in the text it's not there you have betrothal you have marriage you have a relationship between individuals who intend to marry you don't have this idea of people who just kick it because they like each other for right now that's how you end up with the wrong one you get involved before you evaluate that's a problem that's a problem and again as a father you know here's the picture that our culture paints a picture paints this culture a father is doing his job if you know when a young man comes over a suitor comes over for his teenage daughter he sits down you know and he's he's got this intimidating pose and you stick your chest way out and you ball up you know and you take your rifle out and you're cleaning your rifle you know and you got it we go from snuff right there and you get it spin your stubble you clean your rifle and stuff and what time he's supposed to have our home you know what time you you scare him up real good that's our culture's picture and we think a man's doing a good job if that's what he does before his teenage daughter goes out with a young man we just we just change the scenario just briefly just just slightly change the scenario same picture except now I have a $200,000 Lamborghini Testarossa in front of my house and it's not no 17 18 year-old boy who has not yet walked into manhood because our culture hasn't asked them to is going to come over my house to drive my $200,000 Lamborghini testa Rossa am i going to be satisfied just cleaning my gun and scaring him real good and then giving him the keys see here's what bothers me our culture has taught you to value a $200,000 car more than a man's daughter that's sick you gave you $200,000 car to a 17 year old boy you're an idiot but when I said that about my daughter you thought I was crazy why you've been lied to that's why I'd much sooner give up the keys to a $200,000 car than to take a chance on some young man manipulating and abusing the emotions of my daughter and since you're playing that role tonight that means you ladies the first thing we're looking for as we partner together this father and daughter is a man who is committed committed to God honoring labor secondly well look at the each of these in turn in the text secondly a man who is committed to God's law committed to God's law and I know what you say well wait a minute wait a minute wait a minute this is before the fall there is no law you hold on to that idea all right thirdly this man must be committed committed to the priority of the family the priority of the family okay let's look at these three in turn first of all committed to God honoring labor the Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden now this the Garden of Eden is the perfect man is in the perfect environment a lot of people think of work as something evil as something bad as something odious it must be the result of the fall right I mean that isn't that the case no no he puts them in there to work it and to keep it there's work before the fall it's not work that's a product of the fall it's our attitude toward work that's a product of the fall look with me in chapter 3 and chapter 3 you see the fall and after that you see these three cursors and look at verse 17 to Adam he said because you have listened to the voice of your wife by the way stop there for a moment notice he didn't say Adam because you ate from the fruit of the tree hey I don't write the mail I just deliver it God said cuz you listen to that woman take it for what it's worth alright because you're listening to the voice of you are by the way I'll explain that later don't worry ladies and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you you shall not eat of it cursed is the ground because of you in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life thorns and thistles thistles it shall bring forth for you and you shall eat of the plants of the field by the sweat of your face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground out of it you were taken for your dust and to dust you shall return it's the toil and the labor and the hardship of work that is a result of the fall not work itself not work itself you know you hear about the Protestant work ethic this idea of the Puritan work ethic that an all labor there is gain that labor is a reward in itself that's something that's foreign to us but laziness sloth is sinful it's godless turn with me if you will look to the right with me and look at proverbs Leah proverbs chapter 6 proverbs chapter 6 and verse 6 go to the ant Oh hugger consider her ways and be wives without having any chief officer or ruler she prepares her bread and summer and gathers her food in harvest so here's the end nobody's saying don't do this don't do that no chief no nothing the ant just doesn't consider the ant think about that verse 9 how long will you live eros sluggard when will you arise from your sleep a little sleep a little slumber a little folding of the hands to rest and poverty will come upon you like a robber and want like an armed man turn to the right look at chapter 26 in this same book the first 13 the sluggard says there is a lion in the road laziness will make you a coward who then laziness will make you a coward you'll always find an excuse not to work ladies and you running up on men who find excuses not to work or men who always need somebody to tell them what to do and when to do it hmm or a man who's diligent which is it biblical manhood is characterized by a love for God honoring labour look at the next part of this as a door turns on its hinges so does the sluggard on his bed by the way you notice something similar between chapter 6 and chapter 26 a little sleep a little slumber you see in chapter 6 here you see like a door turning on these hinges there's a sluggard in his bed ladies you got a man who doesn't want to get up in the morning hmm I don't write the mail I just deliver it that's laziness it's ungodly it's ungodly little next part of this the sluggard buries his hand in the dish it wears him out to bring it back to his mouth that's death lazy I'm hungry well eat what's wrong I don't feel like my back that's lazy okay that's the picture that's painted here so lazy that the effort to bring the food and nourishment that he needs back to his mouth is not even there by the way this is the epitome of all laziness God says you want to be sustained labor and toil so if you are lazy you are actually committed to your own destruction and ladies if you end up with a lazy man you're committed to yours look at verse 16 the slugger the sluggard is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who can answer sensibly he's always got an excuse for his laziness always got an excuse for his laziness he's wiser in his own eyes then seven men who can answer suitably now you line up seven men who can just you ask him a question in a boom boom boom boom boom is the answer the lazy man one thing he's not lazy about is making excuses that's ungodly that is not biblical manhood a lazy man does not qualify when we're looking for biblical manhood turn with me to the right I want you to see something else look at the New Testament look at 2nd Thessalonians I want you to see something here in 2nd Thessalonians second Thessalonians chapter 3 then look right because it's the wrong book and in verse six now we command you brothers in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ that you keep away from any brother who is walking in idleness and not in accord with a tradition that you received from us so the Apostles taught the churches about laziness okay so this is not some you know way out there an important issue here the Apostles themselves taught the churches about laziness verse seven for you yourselves know how you ought to imitate us because we were not idle when we were with you nor did we eat anyone's bread without paying for it but with toil and labor we worked night and day that we might not be a burden to any of you it was not because we do not have that right but to give you in ourselves an example to imitate so here's what the Apostles are saying we had every right as apostles to come to you and say because we're teaching you the word and because your apostles the workman is worthy of his hire you need to take care of us because we're taking care of you spiritually but because laziness was so prevalent here in Thessalonica they said in order to teach this church a lesson we're not going to take anything from them we're going to work in order to model for them what biblical manhood is so the Apostles didn't receive the support in Thessalonica that they could have asked for and they did so in order to demonstrate to this church a biblical work ethic keep reading for even when we were with you we would give you this command if anyone is not willing to work let him not eat for we hear that some among you walk in idleness not busy at work but busy bodies now such persons we command and encourage in the Lord Jesus Christ to do their work quiet and to earn their own living men doesn't work don't let him eat you know there are some times when in church it is sinful to give benevolence to a man if a man is lazy God intends for him to be hungry so if we're giving to a man who is lazy we're actually working against God and the Bible says here clearly in black and white if a man doesn't work don't let him eat don't feed a man who's not willing to work don't do it don't do it you are encouraging his laziness don't do it hunger is an incredible motivator even Adam before the fall in perfect pristine surroundings worked the garden he worked it turn with me to the right look at first Timothy chapter 5 this is a spiritual issue here verse 8 if anyone does not provide for his relatives and especially for members of his household he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever a commitment to God honoring labor is a mark a biblical manhood it is an absolute necessity and it's not just individuals who are not willing to work again my point here is not that you have a man you know who just doesn't like work or is just unwilling to work I mean it's also if a man didn't like to work if he's not committed to doing all of his hands fine to do and sees that as honoring God everything that my hand is fine to do I'd do it to bring honor and to bring glory to God and I see excellence in that I seek excellence I want excellence in everything my hands find to do that's biblical manhood biblical manhood says I may be a streetsweeper but I tell you what at the cleanest streets in the whole city cuz I clean streets to the glory and honor of God you can go to work every day and still be lazy amen you can go to school every day and still be lazy you can go school every day make good grades you still be lazy that was me find out that you can kind of make it find out that you can memorize things well so what do you do wait until the last minute that's a mark of laziness when you go into a class are you interested in maximizing your mastery of the subject or doing as little as possible to gain the grade that you need which is it answer that question and you answer whether or not you're lazy what are you studying whatever can get you out the quickest or whatever takes full advantage of the gifts talents abilities and desires that God has given you for his glory and for his honor what is it what is it ladies these are the kind of questions we we have to ask you see when you and I sit down together and we're talking about your future mate this is the stuff that we have to discuss no lazy men that's not biblical manhood secondly not only a commitment to God honoring labor but also a commitment to the law of God back in Genesis 2 and the Lord God commanded the man saying you may surely eat of every tree of the garden but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die that's the law of God we don't even have the Ten Commandments but we've already got a law of God God lays down a law right here in the midst of perfection so we don't have the law of God because of imperfection no before the fall we had the law of God before the fall he must be committed to the law of God most men don't know the law of God let alone a committed to it they don't know it one of the little tests here is an interesting little test I want you to think right now in your mind of the Ten Commandments you know 95% of Americans do not and that's it's true of churchgoers as it is of those who don't go to church do you know the law of God and again I'm not saying everything do you just know the most basic the 10 that you don't get more basic than the Decalogue you don't get more basic than the Ten Commandments do you know the Ten Commandments and then if your answer to that is no here's what I want to ask you how you gonna sit up here in my face asking me for my daughter and you don't even know the Ten Commandments you're supposed to be a godly man into whose hands I entrust one of the greatest resources that God has given to me and you don't know the basics of his law get out of my house it's exactly what I'd say to you and don't come back again unless you at least know that much of the law of God why because you are asking to be the father of my future generations and they will not be lawless committed to the law of God committed to the law of God and again for most of us I mean that's just something that's just for and we just don't know give me half give me five you see but again don't feel bad this is the culture that we live in remember what I told you we've been lied to this is the culture that we live in we sit here going ballfield bill full bedroom as he committed to God honoring labor he's a great ballplayer is he committed to the law of God is he he's got a lot of money if we're interested in Biblical manhood we have to be interested in the law of God by the way part of his responsibility is to communicate to you ladies the law of God God gives this law to Adam Adam turns around and gives us a lot of Eve and one of the problems don't know for certain because the text doesn't necessarily say for certain but when Eve communicates the law when she's talking to the serpent to the serpent and by the way her husband is there so he's not protecting his wife huge problem in Chapter three now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made he said to the woman did God actually say you shall not eat of any tree of the garden and the woman said to the serpent we may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden but God said you shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden neither shall you touch it lest you die Wow that's not what God said is it she hasn't been properly discipled that's why in Romans 5 it says through the sin of one man Adam fall didn't come through the sin of Eve fall comes through the sin of Adam who's responsible there's headship here even here but wait a minute I thought that headship was because of the fall and when there was the curse and God curses Eve and it says that he shall rule over you and that's what we got this whole idea of headship which again is why some egalitarians argue that when we become Christians that that whole idea of headship is no longer relevant because now we've sought to reverse that idea of the fall and because of that we have this egalitarian idea no longer this idea of headship newsflash we see headship way before the fall well how do we see headship before the fall who was made first coordinate first Corinthians chapter 11 Paul says Adam has headship because he was made first by the way Adam is exercising dominion over all of these other creatures by what naming them Eve shows up on the scene what does he do names her headship before the fall so what is head shift me remind you woman me say you do no that's not headship headship means you don't get to say god it was that woman that you gave me that's what Adam did he threw his wife under the bus then he tried to throw God under the bus what happened that woman that that you gave me he also see headship because when Adam is cursed what does God say because you listen to your wife you did not exercise the headship that you were given in Ephesians chapter 5 we see this picture of the husband washing his wife with the water of the word in Ephesians chapter 6 we see this picture of the husband in Ephesians chapter 6 and by the way we get a repeat of part of the law we get a repeat of the fifth commandment it Ephesians chapter six children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right honor your father and your mother which is the first commandment the promise that it may go well with you and you may live long in the land and father's do not provoke your children to anger but you bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord master question ladies if it's a man's responsibility to disciple his wife and his children why on earth would you go get a man who doesn't know the law of God why it happens all the time that's not a man that's a fractured vessel that's not a man and so here you are saying I'm going to be the mother of thousands in generations to come and because I think more about the ball field and billfolds and the bedroom I will sacrifice the spiritual future of generations to come so that I can be satisfied with what the world says it's most valuable god help us god help us because that's exactly what women are saying all over the place and claiming to be followers of Christ coming up talking about the possibility of marrying non-believers and in relationships with men who are non-believers first of all that's black and white Paul tells us in second Corinthians that's black and white do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever do not that's a clear-cut command it's not even an option I'm not even talking about that that's not even worthy of discussion if you're thinking about that I'm going back to message number one and I've questioned whether or not you're even converted I'm talking here not just about whether or not a person is coming into the kingdom by the skin of their teeth I'm talking about whether or not somebody knows the law well enough to teach it to you and to your children until you meet a man that's qualified to disciple you and your children you have not met a man who's qualified to be your husband did I make that clear enough do all of my daughter's hear that he must be committed to the law of God he has to be he has to be finally this man must be committed to the primacy of the family back in Genesis chapter 2 I want you to see this there in verse 18 we see that statement is not good that man should be alone I want you to grasp I just I just I want you to grasp the magnitude of that statement six days in creation there is the same pattern over and over again day one let there be then there was it was good day - let there be than there was it was good day three let there be than there was it was good day for all together let there be then there was it was good day five let there be then there was it was good day six let there be then there was it was good every day same pattern first time in the creation process God says something is not good it's when a man doesn't have a woman the first time in creation God says something is not good at the does this mean that every man has to be married in order to be complete no because we know for example be in Matthew 19 Jesus refers to some as being eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom we know in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 Paul refers to those in no circumstances in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 because he says I believe it's in verse 26 because of the present distress it is good for you to remain as you are so we know that there are circumstances under which there are times when it may be better off for a man not to take a wife and we know that there are individuals who have a special calling and gifting from God not to take a wife so we know that when we look at the totality of Scripture we know that however let me say this marriage is the preferred position I argue from this text every man ought to be prepared to be a husband and every woman ought to be prepared to be a wife I'm raising every one of my sons and preparing my sons to be a husband I'm raising my daughter's and preparing my daughters to be wives well well well what if God has called him to be single here's the thing is there one standard for godly married people and another standard for godly single people no no there's not so I can't go wrong by preparing them to be the kind of person who's qualified to be a husband and a wife I can't go wrong can't go wrong well well well I don't agree with that because Jesus was single yeah that's true but he's engaged Bible says the church is his bride and it's going to be a wedding Jesus our model of ultimate manhood is engaged amen hallelujah praise the Lord and so if we want men to be christ-like they need to be men who are committed to the family that's not what our culture says our culture says men are to treat marriage like a plague to be avoided as long as possible that's what our culture said even in the church I know this I got married the summer between my sophomore and junior year in college I just turned 20 years old I don't even have I don't have a driver's license I got a driver's license so I could get my marriage license I did I went into the place that I had my student ID and they said they wouldn't give me a marriage license that's what you need well you can get a passport and it'll take you this long or you can get a license and then take you this long and I heard I mean oh man Christian people Church folks they were just it was like I was getting it was like it was sin you know what we married no get married you get but you you're so young yeah yeah and we would get longer to be married to each other wait what but you have your whole life ahead of you yes yes I do and I'm looking at her oh but see uh uh that's not the way the church teaches young men to think about marriage marriage is something to be put off as long as possible even in the church you need to go and be and do here's what we're communicating to young men and we don't even realize this is what we're saying you need to suck all of the joy out of life and then when you've done that come to some woman and give her the leftovers that's what we're teaching young men not you need to have as a priority in your mind that you are preparing to be a husband and a father with a multi-generational vision of raising up arrows to launch for the sake of the kingdom of God in your youth protect your purity and when you become a man guard yourself and pray that God would perchance grant unto you in your youth a woman with whom you can start a dynasty it's not I want my son's to think the people treated us like there was something that was a book in the Bible that we hadn't read yet that said it was wrong you know second hesitations or something you know since thou shalt not marry until after graduation you know my Bible says when a man finds a wife he finds a good thing amen I'm like wait a minute man I found my good thing you want me to wait she might get away well you guys just need to you just need to hold off you just need to wait why better to marry than to burn with passion I want her but I will not defile her therefore I'm gonna marry her well you just need to wait two reasons I can't do that well what two reasons you can't do that number one if I ask my wife or my fiance to wait for me to graduate before we get married I am saying to her that my education is more important to me than my marriage and that's wrong no way in the world my education is more important than my marriage and I won't communicate that to her I won't start my marriage off by putting things before my wife problem number two the wisest man in the Bible the strongest man in the Bible and the most godly man in the Bible all film the sexual sin I am NOT wiser than Solomon I am NOT more godly than David and I'm not stronger than Samson I need to get married it's some of you out there know exactly what I'm talking about because you're one of these people who come up to me sometime and say things like yes we're gonna get married in the spring of 2011 help you see we've been taught to put everything else before marriage and family everything else first time we see God saying that it's not good here's the other thing that you see you see God saying for this cause shall a man leave his mother and father and be united with his wife cleave unto his wife be joined unto his wife for this cause a man will leave his mother and father now in order to understand that you can understand something that happens later on in the law we already quoted from Ephesians chapter 6 what Paul says there to the church at effort there too in the end is Ephesian letter about the first commandment with a promise that's the fifth commandment alright so some of y'all I just helped you out you okay you're just a little bit closer now to one of my dogs that's the fifth commandment okay now sometimes the law is referred to as being written in two tables the two tables of the law the first four Commandments are the vertical Commandments about our duty to God the last six about our duty to man now here's what's interesting about that you don't get a promise until commandment number five now that's significant when you understand what 1 through 4 are that don't have promises and I'll just paraphrase them for you commandment number 1 I'm God you don't get another one amen that's the first commandment God can we get a promise with that nope no promise come here at number 2 don't even make Nothing that look like me okay we got to get a promise for that one we can't even make little nope no promise just do it commandment number three don't mess with my name huh that's right don't even miss use my name you know you give us promise with that one stuff slips harlot no no commandment number four work for six days not on the seventh don't even mess with my day when we get a promise with that no commandment number five honor your father and your mother with that one I'll give you a promise you think that's not significant it's the first one in the second table it's number one on the hit parade honor your father and your mother this commandment number five you know what it comes before six don't murder seven don't commit adultery eight don't steal nine don't bear false witness ten don't covet and so we see there in the fifth commandment this importance of honoring your mother and your father there's a commandment honor your mother and your father but what does God say about marriage both in Genesis 2 and then again in Ephesians chapter 5 for this cause what caused marriage shall you leave your mother and father and be joined to your wife for this cause now let me give you just a just a little glimpse into the importance of marriage in the economy of God it's every man call to be married no there are some very few we have a special gift or dispensation from God to not and that's not part of the situation but whether you're married or not you still are committed to biblical family even in your own family for example back in Ephesians chapter 6 children obey your parents from the Lord but this is right honor your father and your mother which is the first commandment with a promise so even in the context of your home whether you ever get married or not because here's the question that my daughter's want to ask me and I know you want to ask me that cuz I'm your daddy I know you okay and you're going okay daddy how do we know if a man is committed to marriage and family he's never had marriage yeah but he's been part of a family is he obedient and respectful and does he honor his mother and father if he doesn't he's not gonna honor his marriage so daughters don't you bring me a disobedient disrespectful son because if I wasn't willing to raise one I'm not willing to let you marry one into my family okay does he understand the biblical concept of family does he have a multi-generational vision does he view himself as a father is he committed to children is he committed to that is he committed to providing for you in such a way that you can devote your life to those children is he committed to that or he's he some pragmatic utilitarian materialistic American who sees you as another wage earner so he can live in ease by the way this was the minimalist version there's a whole lot more to it than this but if we're just stripping it down to the bare minimum he must be committed first and foremost to God honoring labor secondly he must be committed to God's law and thirdly he must be committed to a biblical multi-generational view of family that is the very least that one would expect from anyone who claims to exemplify biblical manhood and I know our time we need to start our there

Channel: Truth Endures

Views: 8,422

Rating: 4.9432626 out of 5

Keywords: Voddie Baucham

Id: 9ET8KTr5L0c

Length: 62min 55sec (3775 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 02 2016