LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AUBREY PLAZA. >> THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. WOW. IT IS GREAT TO BE HERE HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE." I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE, AND, YES, I MEAN THAT. I KNOW SOMETIMES WHEN I TRY TO BE SINCERE, IT CAN COME OFF AS SARCASTIC, BUT I CARE. I REALLY DO. I CARE ABOUT THINGS. PEOPLE JUST THINK I'M WEIRD BECAUSE OF THE CHARACTERS THAT I PLAY, BUT I'M A NORMAL PERSON. I HAD A NORMAL CHILDHOOD WITH NORMAL PARENTS. IN FACT, THEY'RE BOTH HERE TONIGHT. I LOVE YOU GUYS. OKAY. THAT WAS A LIE. BUT MY REAL FAMILY IS HERE, INCLUDING MY GRANDMA MARGIE. HI, GRANDMA. THEY ALL CAME UP HERE FROM DELAWARE, WHICH IS WHERE I'M FROM. THANK YOU. I WAS ACTUALLY VOTED THE MOST FAMOUS PERSON FROM DELAWARE. I BEAT JOE BIDEN. THAT'S A FACT. AND HE WAS PISSED. HE WAS LIVID. LOOK AT THIS VIDEO HE SENT ME. >> AUBREY, YOU'RE THE MOST FAMOUS PERSON IN DELAWARE AND THERE'S NO QUESTION ABOUT THAT. WE'RE JUST GRATEFUL YOU MADE IT OUT OF "WHITE LOTUS" ALIVE. >> BUT I'M SO HAPPY TO BE BACK HERE IN 30 ROCK. WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE, I ACTUALLY WORKED HERE AS AN NBC PAGE. THAT IS TRUE. TAKE A LOOK AT THAT. YEP, THERE I AM. SO CUTE. I WORKED WITH A SET DESIGN TEAM HERE AT SNL, THE GUYS WHO MAKE ALL THE AMAZING SETS FOR THE SHOW. THEY WIN EMMYS, TONYS, AND THEY'RE SOME OF THE SICKEST PERVERTS I'VE EVER MET, AND I'M A FREAK. SO LIKE MOST PAGES, I HAD TO GIVE TOURS AROUND THE BUILDING. SO YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING, WHY DON'T I TAKE YOU ON A TOUR RIGHT NOW? [ APPLAUSE ] >> COOL. THANK YOU, GUYS. YOU GUYS WILL DEFINITELY HOST SNL SOME DAY. YEAH RIGHT. OKAY. SO THIS IS THE HISTORIC STUDIO 8 H BUILT IN 1589 BY WILLIAMS SHAKESPEARE. HEY, DANNY. YOU STILL A LITTLE BITCH? RIGHT HERE, WE HAVE THE SNL PAGE DESK. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT JOBS AT THE SHOW, WHICH IS WHY I WAS NEVER PUT HERE. I WAS WHAT THEY CALLED A BAD PAGE WITH TERRIBLE PHONE ET KIT, WHICH IS NOT TRUE BY THE WAY. I'LL GET THAT. HELLO? STUDIO 8 H. OH, YOU WANT TO TALK TO LAUREN MICHAELS, DO YOU? LAUREN MICHAELS AIN'T HERE, IS HE? SO BACK TO YOU, AIN'T IT, YEAH? THAT WAS FOR TOM McCARTNEY, AND THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT. HERE'S A LITTLE STUDIO SECRET. THERE USED TO BE THIS STORAGE CLOSET, AND WHEN I WAS TOO HUNG OVER TO FINISH A TOUR, I WOULD BE LIKE JUST WAIT RIGHT HERE AND YOU CAN MEET KRISTEN WIG, AND THEN I WOULD PUKE IN THE BATHROOM AND GO HOME. I GUESS KRISTEN NEVER SHOWED UP. THAT'S ON HER. HERE'S THE CLOSET WHERE ALL THE MAGIC HAPPENS. HERE'S KENAN THOMPSON. IT'S AUBREY, AND I'M HOSTING NOW. I'M NOT A PAGE ANYMORE. >> I KNOW. I ORDERED IT IN 2004. >> SEE. BAD PAGE. NEXT UP ON THE TOUR IS THE SET DESIGN DEPARTMENT WHERE I USED TO WORK. ON EVERY TOUR, PEOPLE WOULD ASK THE SAME QUESTION, ARE WE GOING TO SEE A CELEBRITY? NO, YOU'RE GOING TO SEE A SECURITY OFFICER CRYING BECAUSE THEIR SCENE GOT CUT. YOU DON'T JUST SEE -- >> HI AUBREY! >> LOOK AT YOU! >> HOW ARE YOU? >> AUBREY, I SEE THAT YOU'RE WEARING YOUR PAGE JACKET, ARE YOU DRINKING AGAIN? >> OF COURSE, I AM. I WAS JUST GOING TO THE SET DESIGN OFFICE TO SEE THOSE OLD PERVERTS. >> AUBREY, IT'S NOT NICE TO CALL PEOPLE OLD. OH, MY GOD. SHE STOLE MY WALLET. THAT'S MY GIRL! >> HEY, GUYS. LEO, JOE, DID YOU GUYS MISME. HEY, LEO WHEN I WAS SHOWING UP AN HOUR LATE AND BARELY WORKING, DID YOU EVER EXPECT TO SEE ME HOSTING THE SHOW? >> WE ALWAYS BELIEVED IN YOU AVERY. >> THAT'S RIGHT. SO BOW TO YOUR QUEEN. OH, THAT FEELS SO GOOD. NOW, WHAT'S THE FASTEST WAY BACK TO THE STAGE? OH, MY GOD. I TOLD YOU GUYS. THESE GUYS WORK MIRACLES. AND THE BIGGEST MIRACLE OF ALL IS THAT THEY LET ME BACK IN THE BUILDING. OH, MY GOD. I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. I REALLY DID WORK HERE, AND I DREAMED MY ENTIRE LIFE OF STANDING ON THIS STAGE AND SAYING, WE GOT A GREAT SHOW
