Art Of CHOOSING Your EMOTIONS: Part 2: BK Shivani at Silicon Valley (English)

[Music] there are people who will hold you responsible for the rest of their life if you give them a decision today and you have suddenly got entangled with negative energy because deep down here for the next 20 years they're going to say she told me this that's why I did this now see a problem re a problem area but never never when people around us are going through a state of emotional vulnerability give them the support to silence their mind give them a lot of love and care say I'm going to be with you throughout this but decision you have to take I will not give the decision I will not even say anything because you know everything which is right and wrong sit prepare your pros and cons decision you have to take for everything else we are with you we are with you what we do with that is help them to come out of that emotional confusion silence their mind with lot of love and support and then take a decision which is right for their karmic account because when they take the decision then they are responsible for that decision for a lifetime because any decision whether that girl who comes home says should I live with my husband there are going to be things to handle even in that if she says should I get divorced then there are going to be things even to do win that either ways there are going to be things to manage either ways none of them is the smooth road both has something because if she's contemplating something then there are issues in the relationship so it's not going to be easy even if she lives with him immediately she has a lot of inner work to do so either ways there will be some work to do but she'll be able to do that only if the decision was hers otherwise she'll start walking the path and keep calling you after every five days and say up Nivola Tabaka Robert Echidna mush kill hey and so morally the soul does not take personal responsibility of their decision personal responsibility gives power to implement the decision and right now because people are going through a little emotional turbulence we cannot take their decisions for them because that decision may be easy for you because you are in an emotionally stable state right now but that same decision will become difficult for the other person so what's our role as family and friends for them we can't say okay go away I'm not going to talk to you I'm not going to tell you anything no so what's our role as family and friends listen don't listen too much also naturally what will happen by listening if you allow somebody to go on with that negative story for very long you know it's like there's a wound and every time I meet you we sit together and we go and you know what happened and you know what he did and then you know what she said we are rubbing that wound again and again and again and when a person gets someone who is ready to listen that person goes on and on and on talking that negative conversation now we think we are helping them by listening to it but the more they are going to do that negative conversation what's it going to do to the soul power it's going to deplete soul power and if it deplete soul power how will they face that situation how will they face that situation so listen Taurus I don't allow them to go on talking that negative and you know what happened and you know what they did and most important when you're listening why decisions go wrong because you were listening only to one actor of that scene if you had listened only to this wife you would have got a completely different picture of the drama and you would have said re wife this is how her husband treats her so we take both of them the husband and wife to this half of the room will tell them to listen to the wife and this half of the room we are going to tell them to listen to the husband and after that we leave all of you to decide who is right what do you think will happen what do you think will happen this side of the room is going to be hundred percent convinced that re vive so much pain what a victim and this side of the room is going to say are a husband what kind of a wife freeze got what I own a hotel why because both sides are listening to only never-ever never-ever so if someone comes up to you and says you know what this this this tell them will talk if both of you are together don't even waste two minutes listening to one person because even those two minutes are waste of time and energy we say come together we'll talk together they'll say no no no I want to talk separately said no waste of time and energy because we're not able to listen to the other perspectives and when they to sit together to talk all that they have to do is to be able to see the other perspective so the role of family and friends is if the wife comes to you you listen to her for one minute remaining 15 minutes show her the husband's perspective and when the husband comes to you so these are the two set of parents when the husband comes to you don't listen victim victim victim show them the side the perspective of the wife because you are sitting as a detached observer but for that we will have to be emotionally emotionally for that we will have to be emotionally emotionally because the wife who comes to you could be your daughter and when the daughter comes to you crying you get so much sucked into her pain that you cannot see the other perspective so to give her the right advice to help her to heal her relationship this could be a husband wife this could be your five-year-old child at school hit by another friend don't get sucked into emotional dramas like this be detached detached means not sucked into the negative energy be here so that you can help them to see the other side and that's the best gift you can give them because that can heal relationships that can heal relationships when you help your family and friends to be able to understand the perspective and the thought process of the other person in that conflict but that requires us to be that requires us to be requires us to be emotionally detached a lot of people have a fear and apprehension about spirituality they'll say it makes you detached from family it's because we never understood what is detachment we thought detachment means it makes you go away from family detachment only means emotionally you are able to be out of the scene and are able to see the thought process of everybody in the scene and are thereby able to radiate unconditional love and acceptance to the daughter and also to to the daughter and also to also to the son-in-law also to also to the family of the son-in-law because you're so detached but if you are emotionally attached to your daughter along with her there was one person sending negative thoughts to the other family now she's got two more people with her sending them there because we were not detached we were so emotionally attached to her so what is the meaning of being emotionally attached your emotion becomes my emotion when two children are born physically attached what happens they have to sit together stand together sleep together walk together they can do nothing separately because they're physically attached comfortable life comfortable life attachment is good attachment is natural they are family obviously I'll be attached to my children then why the surgery why the surgery to separate them because it's not comfortable now two minds attached what will happen when two minds are attached what will happen what will happen when two minds are attached one will be hurt the other one will also be hurt one will be angry the other one will also get upset surgery you're ready to go in for a surgery are you ready to go in for a surgery which means one is upset and the other is stable one is angry and the other one is peaceful which one is more comfortable which one is more comfortable detached because when one is detached from the others emotions the one who is detached is able to heal the others in the family it's like a family of four walking on the road and there's a bit and one of them missed it and slipped in what happens to the other three they say we are family we love each other so what will happen when one Falls what happens when one Falls we all jump in together together we will fall and that's why we say if one is sad how can we be happy if my child is upset how can I be happy and actually what does your child need that time only a family who is happy so that he is able to come out of the pain but the family believes how can we be happy when our child is upset it is at that time when you have to be the most happy because your happiness is there he linked that will happen when we are emotionally detached and for that we need inner power inner power where we don't get sucked in where we were able to remain at the vibration the frequency way we are where we are so you ready to go in for a surgery are you ready to go in for that surgery that surgery is the need of the hour today in every family last year WH was said on an average almost one in every family has experienced some time in their life a symptom of depression one in four now when they say one in four it becomes one in a family on an average but the risky part is not the one in four the risky part is because of that one because of that one the other three are also upset so it becomes four out of four and that's when the pain escalates many many times many many times and then parents come to us and say hamari but Chico depression here so we say up khajuraho car key and ER you have to create a very lively very vibrant very happy environment and they look at us and say what ruthless people yeah they actually look at us and say how ruthless can you be you want us to be happy when our child has depression no and so then it does not remain as one-in-four then it becomes for unhappy people on an average in every family and that's when the vibration of the world keeps starts going really really really low if we want to finish depression and we want to eradicate it we only need the remaining three to be emotionally detached from that one and to create a powerful pure happy environment at home to bring them out of it and that's why spiritual power and meditation becomes a necessity no more a choice no more something oh I'm interested or I'm not interested no more a choice now it's mandatory mandatory because we need at least one powerful soul in every family now you have to ask yourself whether you're ready to become that one for your family which means for on the road three fell into the pit we need only one outside we don't even need three outside we need only one outside that one is enough that one will bring all the other three out now we have to ask ourselves am I ready to be that one for my family who's ready to invest 30 minutes on themselves every day to keep their emotional intelligence very very high so that even if there is a situation in life at home in family at work they are there outside the pit and just by being there they have to do nothing just by being there what will happen when the low frequency comes in the company of a higher frequency what will happen remember we used to do in that school with the tuning fork what happens what happens to the lower frequency that also starts vibrating at a higher frequency so we need one in every family vibrating at a higher frequency you ready to be that one are you ready to be that one each one of us puts in a lot of effort to give our family financial comforts physical comforts social comforts now is the need to give them the emotional comfort they are all going through Chhota bada-boom area get the whole list your nickel ki hatch and if we go on with the list we are going to come up with a lot more emotional illnesses and these are there at home today these are there even in little little children today and we need one healer in every family to eradicate depression and we need to be that one person thus our state of mind depend on situations and people around us does our state of mind depend on people and situations around us just look at yourself here here is the mind it's going to create thoughts these thoughts which get created here are they dependent on what's happening around us yeah we have a very general profound social setting in our gathering today it shouldn't be C it shouldn't be but sometimes they are have you come across a more wiser and profound person trying things he's a practical proof you know why he's being able to answer all this why parents are not being able to answer Bert why is he being able to answer fast life past life wisdom there are a lot of past life wise souls wisdom is not dependent on the age of the body wisdom is dependent on the sons car of the so similarly emotional illnesses are not dependent on the age of the body sometimes we have young children who say how can my parent do this it's my parent who should be taking care of me it's my parent who should be doing this it's my parent who should be nurturing not parent soul in a body not dependent on age of the body not dependent on relationship with me all dependent on sons car of the soul is our state of mind and thought process dependent on situations and people around us simple situation do you have traffic jams in your city you do it's a situation so you are driving to the airport or you're driving for a very important meeting and there you are stuck situation of life getting irritated or worried is normal it's normal depends on the what I feel here depends on the is it possible that I'm stuck on the road and I'm peaceful and relaxed even if I have to go to the airport and even if it's almost dying is it possible to be relaxed and peaceful yes or no if you laugh like this when you're stuck that day on the road is it possible to laugh like this since a charcoal watney next light possibly not possible is my thought process dependent on the situation in my life it's not whether we do it or not we just need to know the equation of life is the thought process dependent on the situation of life ok opinion poll how many say yes dependent on situation how many say no what do we have everybody else say our 50 hands for yes 50 hands for no and it's supposed to be a Hall of 1300 so what does everybody else say how many say not sure woven a year sorry there has to be some option okay stuck and it in depends on it depends on so it depends on the mind it doesn't depend on the track not if and if not is my taught dependent on this situation it's a yes or it's a no no ifs if not nothing stuck in a traffic jam irritation is normal yes or no okay you got ready on the day of your anniversary wearing a pretty purple sari and your spouse or the either way around forgot that it was your anniversary getting hurt is normal yes or no yes so which means what I am feeling is dependent on and when I start living my life like this then I become a very emotionally dependent soul in a world where everyone's talking of independence freedom liberation freedom liberation independence we are actually extremely independent right now everything that I'm feeling here good or bad is dependent on what's happening outside right or wrong so if the scene is right for me I'm happy it's not about whether the scene is right it's whether the scene is right for me was it possible for that wife to be normal and happy if the husband forgot the anniversary was it really possible is there an option only we are talking about only that is there an option to say he can I did not , Kisco address IV Sal bad with heard of June is it possible also to create that thought yes yes instead of getting hot and saying how can he not remember miracle value in a hair could it just be as simple as you know what you forgot it is 3rd of June or anniversary is it possible is that an option and how many of us can execute that option array you said yes and then you're not even raising your hand that you can execute that option we want to be happy we want to be happy we want to have beautiful relationships we want our family to be happy so then which option should we be using every time which option would be using every time when we say there are two options for what that wife should have felt she could either get hurt or she could be fine which means the mind had options right mind has options but had we been in that scene we would have said my husband does not remember the anniversary obviously I will get hurt when we use the word obviously I will get hurt I am saying I had no other option it's like the button was pressed obviously the mic will switch off and if the button was pressed again which means when he gave her the button obviously she'll be happy and so people are just giving us buttons to make us happy today honestly that was the most important learning from that scene of the drama people can just manipulate our emotions people know what to say for us to go down and people know what to do for us to come up people are manipulating our emotional dependency why because we're allowing them to do that we are allowing them to do that so now getting hurt was obvious or getting hurt was an option very good and which means in every scene of life there is no obvious emotion if there was an obvious emotion which means let's look at this mic for this mic this side is on and this side is off obvious and which means any one of you can come and try it's going to happen the same way and which means try it at any time of the year it's still going to happen the same way so anyone anytime try it and it's going to be on or off obvious any of our emotions are obvious obvious no because we are not machines the difference between a machine and a human being machine has obvious responses human being has options to responses the other day I was at a corporate conference and they had that robot come in and everybody is very happy seeing the robot and the trust person on the state said good morning mitra and mithra said good morning mitra had no other option to reply in any other way he was programmed to do that and people were so happy and they said life will become so comfortable when we work with these kind of robots instead of people and he was telling us how in the next few years thirty percent of the people will not have jobs because they will be replaced by these people robots I said good so when you work for ten hours with this robot who says good morning good evening you when you go back home to your spouse you will expect the same you would have forgotten how to work with a human being you will lose your power to adjust to adapt to different Sun scars then you will need to have a robot at home also so don't look at it as a very interesting option where we are heading towards in the future so the difference between that robot and us is they have programmed responses and come what me let anyone come and say good morning or let anyone come and coerce them they will say good morning sir the same way that's a machine human being human being options so for no emotion of yours should you say obviously I will feel this way obviously I will get angry obviously I'll feel bad obviously I'll be irritated obvious no it's not obvious every time I have to say my say to myself I have an option now the husband forgot the anniversary options one hurt option to remind option three forgive to forgive connect a little belly hurt whenever a gonna hurt hung it up to forgive during a atcha to be forgive third option fourth option surprise him very good fifth option fifth option she should have he says fifth option she should also forget the date you are all preferred this option life will be laughter and fun like this if we all create our options but we use that obviously I will get hurt and friends will also come and say obviously you will get hurt your husband forgot your friend will see so friends are the ones who come and give us these options which makes us laugh which makes us let go of our hurt our anger and makes us laugh at the futility of our emotions that we are holding on to so in any scene of life today meditation will give us the experience to pause and start selecting the options so anytime you are feeling a little low don't use the word obvious just sit back for 10 seconds and say what are my options and if you're not finding the option go to a friend who is able to give you options don't go to a friend who endorses your pain no because that's not what we need that time we don't need to meet another emotionally ill patient we need to meet a healer yeah that healer could be a stranger on the road and the emotionally ill patient could be my parent which means if I go and share my heart and go and tell my mother you know what my husband forgot the anniversary she'll create more hurt than me and she will say my god 20 years my daughter has given to this family she left her job only to look after him and his children even the daughter had not thought of all these lines their mother thinks of more of those lines so you have to take care where you go so if you're vibrating at 50 don't go to someone who's going to vibrate at 20 in that scene you'll have to go to someone who's vibrating at it a and says ok come out pull out what are you getting so melodramatic about this small thing anniversary is sort of ethnic everybody else can there and then that person will tell you you know what last year he did this for your anniversary who's the new sneakiest and suddenly you'll start feeling yes yes yes he says my husband loves me we just need that assurance that time so we need options no emotion is obvious [Music] you

Channel: BKShivani

Views: 406,162

Keywords: Bk Shivani, Sister Shivani, Shivani brahma Kumari, Bk Shivani latest videos 2018, Sister Shivani latest videos 2018, Brahma Kumari sister Shivani, Bk Shivani meditation, B k shivani, Bk shivani English, Shivani, Soul reflections bk shivani, Meditation by bk shivani

Id: niDgf5FzfDg

Length: 31min 45sec (1905 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 03 2018