Value & Respect Yourself ... Don't Ask People For It: Part 3: BK Shivani at Hobart, Australia

let's do only one thing today it's a practice that we are going to begin today what people say to me will not decide what I will say to myself so if someone says to you you are useless what will you say to yourself I am the most beautiful soul and what about they were they right they're not right it's their perception it's who they are it's their choice and that is why the same person can be the most special one to somebody and the same person can be the useless one for someone it's the same person but different people have different choices same flower most special for someone useless for another one same color very special for someone useless for another one same food very important to someone useless for another one somebody likes chocolate someone likes bitter chocolate which chocolate is right and I could say how can they like bitter chocolate how can somebody like bitter chocolate but someone likes only bitter chocolate is that okay yes because each one will have different choices different perceptions different ways of thinking different opinions I cannot be the one whom the whole world will approve of and accept and appreciate I need only one person to approve of me one I need only one person to be nice to me one let's be friends with that one let's be friends with that one we are always looking for the perfect relationship outside the perfect friend outside the one who will always be nice to me the one who will always care for me the one who will always value me the one who will always respect me want to create that relationship with that one who will always value me always respect me always be nice to me where does that one live where does that one live but when someone says three words you are useless I abuse myself I criticize myself i terrorize myself i inflict injury on myself just because someone came and then voiced their opinion and walked off every time people behave in a way which is not comfortable for me I need to spend a few minutes with myself like if someone is not nice to someone you love and they are hurt will you spend a few minutes with them will you spend a few minutes with them will you say nice things to them will you heal them yes suppose I had said to her you are useless and she came home crying or upset feeling low and her parent or friend had seen what happened she said I am useless will they just leave her like that no will they say of course you're useless obviously she was right she said useless what else are you you are only useless will they say that no what will they do what will they do we have to do that with ourselves what we do for others what others do for us we have to start doing that for ourselves so that we don't hold on to these wounds these wounds over a period of time are becoming the cause of me not loving myself it life can become very difficult if I have to live with the one who doesn't love me here and why do I stop loving myself because I've hold held on to wounds and in only when people said things which were not my way can I spend few minutes with myself each time someone's not my way can I do that for myself am i important enough for me yes now how many of you just raise your hands you don't have to share anything found someone on the screen of your mind when you thought of who has not been nice to me did you find someone you found someone just for the next three days just for the next three days please repeat this exercise because there is a wound here we have to heal it just for the next three to five days morning or before going to sleep spend one minute with yourself sit back bring them on the screen of your mind and tell yourself it was just their opinion it was just their perspective it was nothing to do with me my opinion about you is a reflection of my personality it's not about who you are I have to tell this to myself because the day they said that to me I've recorded very horrible things here and that they have not been nice to healing we don't need anybody else to heal us but we definitely need to heal ourselves just makes three to five days spend one minute with yourself bring them on the screen of your mind allow them to have their opinion and most important tell yourself what they said was not about what they said was not about me it was about them sister if I say to you that I don't like your black jacket can I say I don't like your black jacket yes and when I'm saying I don't like your black jacket what am I talking about I'm talking about my choice in clothes I'm talking about my choice so whether I say I don't like your black jacket or I say I don't like you I'm only talking about my choice but we expected the whole world to like our black jacket and then we looked at them and say how could you not like my black jacket and because you don't like it that means there's something wrong with my black jacket and then that made me emotionally so vulnerable that I went on to other people seeking an affirmation that my black jacket was nice that makes us very vulnerable in relationships if I get a rejection in one relationship if one person doesn't be nice to me I go to other people like this because I need to feel good about myself is it necessary that the world has to like her black jacket if all 399 of us don't like her black jacket can her black jacket be nice can her black jacket be nice yes so how many people need to like her black jacket how many people need to like it only she how many people need to like her how many people need to like her only she and it's only when she likes herself that she's being loved and when she's being loved she will radiate pure vibrations to the world and when she is radiating pure vibrations to the world the world will be forced to like her the world will be forced to like her because she's radiating than unadulterated pure love to people the love of she loving herself but if she doesn't love herself and she's standing there like this seeking from the world and the world will put in that whatever they feel is right spirituality teaches us I am a lovefool being every morning bless yourself with one line I don't need love from anyone I don't need it from anyone I am a lovefool being and loveful being means I accept myself the way I am and I'm ready to change it doesn't mean that there is nothing I will change about myself but I accept myself the way I am I don't need people to accept me it's a very depleting feeling to want people's approval to feel good about everything about ourselves right from our clothes to what we have achieved to the person I am approve of me makes me stand like this like a victim and that allows people to manipulate us to emotionally exploit us and it gives them the power to reject us because we gave them the power we gave them the power if I love myself no one can reject me no one can reject me but if I seek it and it depends on the other person to reject me can we begin a new conversation with ourselves and we begin a new conversation with ourselves can we spend a few minutes with ourself to be nice to ourselves yes yes every day that is meditation meditation means being friends with meditation means being friends with myself you know there's always that one person we will have in our life whom we are hundred percent sure that even if no one is nice to me this one person will definitely be nice to me that one person that guarantee of that one person who will always be nice to me that one person has to live here that first person has to live here but that will only happen when I spend a little time with that one person every day but if I say I have no time for you because I'm so busy seeking love from the world and then when the world rejects me and I come and sit with this one person this one person doesn't even know me because I never even spent time with myself I never even spent time to be nice to myself and then when I sit alone with myself my inner conversation is only of self-criticism self-criticism because I have not achieved self-criticism because people don't love me self-criticism because of a mistake I have made in the past I am NOT nice to myself guilt of something that I had done many many years ago I'm holding on because I'm not being nice to myself love means acceptance so many times in the day we use this one word I love you I love you I love you it's become like a signature tune every phone call every message love you I love you it has to change too I accept you the way you are [Music] I accept you the way you are and which means who you are does not create any shift inside here I don't expect you to be my way because I love myself I don't need the world to be my way his expectations normal for us expectation normal for us yes anyone expectation you have from someone sister any expectation any expectation you have from anyone around you expectation normal expectation very normal expectation any expectation normal normal anji expectation of how they should be any expectation treat them with restrict you with respect or you expect them to treat you with respect and what is your definition of they treating you with respect and the other person is going to say of course I respect you but I'm going to say no you don't because my definition of respect and their definition of respect does not match expectation from them normal any expectation normal anyone normal expectation huh being polite is a normal expectation well you expect your husband to wash dishes before going to sleep such a simple simple normal expectation anything wrong when expecting that my husband will wash dishes before going to sleep anything wrong with it no perfect normal expectation but when they don't do what we want them to do when they don't do what we want them to do when they don't be the way we want them to be I create hurt and when I create hurt I say you are the cause of my pain I don't expect sister to walk out like this in front of me in the middle of the program and she walked off so sweetly and politely I don't expect her to walk out is it fair for her to walk out like that is it fair for her to walk out like that yes it's fair for her to walk out like that I expected her to sit for another 20 minutes couldn't she do that much for me could she do that much for me could she do that much for me she hurt me I'll never come back to your city we say all these things we say this we speak like this to ourselves because they have not been the way we expected them to be without understanding that the other person has a reason for what they are doing even if the reason was as simple as she's bored and she wants to walk out does she have a right to do that does she have a right to do that yes she has the right to do that but I have programmed my mind saying respect means you will sit there till nine o'clock this is my definition of respect and which means if anybody walks up with up before nine o'clock they don't respect me and that sister is going to say of course I respect you but I had to leave early I said no you don't respect me because if you respected me you wouldn't have walked out my definition of respect and her definition of respect is different but I created my programming saying those who walk out before 9 o'clock don't respect me and if they don't respect me they don't love me and if they don't respect me I don't respect them why should I respect someone who doesn't respect me why should I respect someone who walks out 20 minutes before lo1 Moore is working on see this is this is my programming which does not allow me to be happy this programming does not allow me to respect myself and most important it does not allow me to respect others was she allowed to walk out 20 minutes before yes is she right is she right is she right sure then look at all those people who are not being the way you want them to be and now say to yourself they are right are they right are they right don't live any other reason because for me this was very important that she walked out and yet you all have unanimously said to me what was wrong in her walking out not even one of you was on my side and you know what that means none of you also respect me because you don't understand me you're not understanding my pain you're not understanding my heart you don't love me this is what I talk here inside and every line goes and then I say the world is not nice to me the world is just being themselves but I am seeing them being themselves and choosing to say to myself they don't respect me and after that nothing allows me to be happy with myself so if she was allowed to walk out then everyone in my life is allowed to do what they feel is right I can express my opinion I can request her please wait for 20 minutes but that does not mean she will stay that does not mean she will stay and that does not mean I'm not a nice person so someone can walk out for 20 minutes and someone can actually walk out they can and it does not mean I'm not a nice person it does not mean that I am NOT a nice person and just that how we respected her decision to walk out we will have to respect the decisions of people choosing to be their way I am NOT going to bake the world to be nice to me because the world is being nice but their definition of nice is not matching my definition of respect and the world is in pain only because each one of us is asking others to respect me [Music]

Channel: BKShivani

Views: 1,616,139

Keywords: Bk Shivani, Sister Shivani, Shivani brahma Kumari, Bk Shivani latest videos 2018, Sister Shivani latest videos 2018, Brahma Kumari sister Shivani, Bk Shivani meditation, B k shivani, Bk shivani English, Shivani, Soul reflections bk shivani, Meditation by bk shivani

Id: iOUky23LBfM

Length: 20min 39sec (1239 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 30 2019