An Interview with my Alcoholic Father | Junkin' - A Redemption Story

[Music] [Applause] [Music] d this here is Cornelius and I made him out of an old motorcycle frame that we couldn't figure out what type of frame it was from and some shovels and just a rock for the metal this is a railroad pickaxe for the head door knobs for the eyes and that's Cornelius and this is Mr Gulch he's something I created um for some reason I had something on my mind he's made out of different like here's a a gear that I found these are hinges here from my son zel Camino this is a cylinder head from a motorcycle for the snout the to are railroad spikes and uh that's Mr Gulch my name is Mike Heck and I'm an artist at least now I am after retiring from the Iron Workers Union Local 8 where I work for 25 [Music] years [Music] I worked hard I was respected at work you know but then usually end of the day I was looking forward to the end of the day not just to go home but just to have a beer soon as I got done working went to the car started up cracked the beer and started heading home sometimes it might be an hour away sometimes it might be uh a half an hour away so um the further away the more beers I would have you know before I got home it'd be like every 10 minutes I'd be opening another one so six or more on a on an hour drive [Music] home then I get home park myself on that chair and set my 30 pack there and just sit there and drink and think always had big piles of beer cans sometimes on my porch you know it they just be stacked up stacked up empty cans I just come on set another one right next to it and do the same thing it was just a repetition I did it every day for for like years that that was just my day go to work and drink when you work like that you think that you're providing for your family and you're doing the right thing because you're making money you're providing for your family but that ain't all there is to it as far as um helping my family and other people you know I was always willing to help and and uh I I did and I I usually did a good job but then I started being uh unreliable where I you know you'd say oh yeah I'll come and help you and then uh I just blew him off and then after a while then you know they they didn't even ask for my help [Music] anymore and then there were times where you know and he would um ask me to help him work on his Alchemy you know he'd actually physically come come in the house Dad I need your help and I just say yeah okay yeah I'll be right out and then uh I'd never go out there I it's like he didn't even talk to me you know he didn't even ask me I missed out on some opportunities that um that he did he actually needed me and I wasn't there for him Cory he was uh real big into sports and uh I went to a couple of his little league games in the beginning then I slowly um I didn't go to any after that I guess at the time beer was bigger part of my life than my own Sons you know they grew up now you know and I I I missed out on a lot of things they're never going to play Little League again they're never going to do some of the things that they did when they were children you know and what dads were supposed to do and I never did it you know surprised he even you know part of my life now sometimes I had the potential to to do um what way way better than what I did you know it was in my heart and in my you know in my spirit but um the drinking took that away from [Music] me so a lot of times I you know I I'd be depressed and I drank and then um I'd be just looking for something to do so I'd kind of look in the paper and find there R sale an auction and I just you know rather than being alone and depressed I just go there and be out and look for things and then uh especially near the end they just pile up big things and you get it for five bucks you know and here's me five bucks you know finally I got a trailer full of all these pots and pans and dishes and all kinds of stuff that you know I I had no use for no use what whatever for it but I I just bought it if I seen a rage s I'd usually stop and kind of had a thing where I I'd try to at least buy one thing just because I was there I didn't want to walk away empty handed sometimes I'd come home and have a whole couldn't fit no more in my truck empty it out and maybe do the thing the next day too you know and that's when I was drinking I did that for probably 30 some years and also I have piles of good junk not real good junk total junk and then just bunch of crap and then the crap pile kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger and so I had 30 years of junk sitting in my [Music] driveway actually the uh the city came and complained to me about all my junk and then uh I had to organize it maybe a little bit better and hide it that's what I did I hit it you know just times where I I'd get some things and uh you know have maybe a vision in my mind that I was going to do something with it and that would never happen my my vision wasn't clear because it was blocked by the [Music] alcohol might kind of regret quite a bit when uh my sister tried to help me when I did go finally go in and get checked out after I got back out I was going to enroll in the program and then um I just blew it off and that kind of really hurt um my whole family cuz everybody was hoping that that would turn me around and um I kind of just walked away and kind of went into a lonely part of my life I just thought it was just me and my beer then I then it started getting worse didn't feel like doing anything just sat and drank every day and I got in trouble again this time I was serious now it'll beep there we go good to start when I got pulled over and uh saw the lights behind me I pretty much knew what was going to happen and he came and asked me if I was drinking and I did tell him I had couple and then that's when he asked me to get out of the car and he did the field sobriety test I knew I wasn't going to pass um so says have you been ever arrested for OWI and I said yes he said well that's what you're being arrested for now I was potentially looking at 3 years in jail I would have lost my dogs my property my vehicles um my job obviously I I would have lost everything that I ever worked for or collected would have been by myself with nothing absolutely nothing I ended up hiring a lawyer because it was my third offense and then he um had mentioned to me about a program and um it was to help you to um to quit drinking and um they knew how much I drank you know drink drinking a 12pack a day they didn't think that I'd maybe be able to control that but it was entirely up to the judge whether he'd um even allow me to be a part of that that program it was my best option or my best thing that could have happened to me at the time and then that was my day to go to court I went in to face the judge I was hopeful but I wasn't expecting to be in the program when the judge told me that he was going to give me a try I um felt very relieved and um even though I knew it was going to be a long road he had some faith in me and he wanted to give me a second chance that's when I really decided that that I'm I'm going to take this very serious and I'm going to prove to that judge that um he did the right thing also I I wanted to prove it to myself that I can do this and I I can beat this problem and then um for the people that helped me the people that tried to help me if I turn myself around and better myself um maybe I could earn back some of that friendship it was quite a bit of work but I also um learned a lot of cognitive um tools and how the brain actually works how you can utilize it to um help yourself and others there times where um what you did they didn't think was good enough and you had to do it over and they helped you you know and explained to you that this wasn't quite what they were looking for so it was quite extensive and it was a commitment every other week all the people that were in the classes would meet at the courthouse and then you'd have to each person individually would have to face the job judge he to ask you how you're doing and um if you had any violations in your test for drugs and alcohol and he he was interested in how you were doing and um showed somewhat concern that to help you um get through this it was quite rewarding you know at the end that I completed this and accomplished that and um that was just a short road to a recovery but I was on my way I started becoming proud of myself rather than um disappointed in myself I was actually becoming proud of what I'm I'm doing now after I started becoming sober you know and uh having more time on my side and my thoughts and some of the things that I've learned I started looking at more of my stuff and um looking at in a different way and um started being able to use some of it and actually um create things out of it I started Gathering pieces up and I had putting something in my mind and then I started welding stuff together and creating things and um it wasn't junk anymore it was actually something that I created and was kind of rewarding to to actually make something and visually look at it and maybe somebody else can appreciate it too many of items I I make are um requests for people for um donations like the lymia foundation uh the CMT uh make oish different things and they have little like silent auctions I'm there and I see all these people wow look at this I want this and they keep buying tickets and keep bidding on it it and um it makes me feel good because it's actually going to a good cause and for me it's was just a bunch of pile of trunk you know and these people are paying hundreds of dollars for it just because they think it's really um special and um something handmade and uh giv me a lot of satisfaction doing [Music] it it's kind of um like drinking it's pretty hard to stop um I'm glad I stopped drinking but um junking might be a little hard to to stop if it makes me happy and it makes other people happy um you can't go [Music] wrong [Music] I don't want to stop acquiring junk I just want to keep creating artwork and making people happy [Music] do

Channel: Andy Heck

Views: 15,781

Keywords: documentary, documentaryfilm, independentdocumentary, independentfilm, personalstory, personalstories, alcoholaddiction, recovery, mentalhealth, mentalhealthawareness, recoveryjourney, recoveroutloud, recover, addiction, alcoholicsanonymous, wisconsin, wisconsinlife, recoveryisreal, art, upcycle, recoveryispossible, alcoholism

Id: 9Gv5An1QPwU

Length: 16min 55sec (1015 seconds)

Published: Tue Feb 13 2024