-Half of all adults in the US
have now received at least one shot
of the COVID-19 vaccine, and as of today,
all adults are eligible, and as a result,
even Republicans are admitting they're having a hard time
criticizing President Biden. For more on this,
it's time for A Closer Look. ♪♪ As horrific and nightmarish
as the pandemic has been -- and it is by no means over, especially throughout
the rest of the world -- we are now hitting some
genuinely exciting milestones. -The race to vaccinate hitting
two major milestones today. The CDC reports that
50% of all adults have received at least
one vaccine dose, and 25% of all Americans
are now fully vaccinated. -Starting today, every adult
across the nation is eligible
to get a COVID shot. -When I think back
to the lowest points of this hellish year,
there were times when it was impossible to imagine
the progress we're seeing now. There were times when I honestly
thought there was a chance I'd be locked in
the captain's quarters talking to a painting
for the rest of my life, urinating into jars,
growing a long, scraggly beard, and rolling my eyes
at dumb, maritime-themed puns. Thankfully, thankfully,
that ship has sailed. I'm sorry. Half of adults have now
gotten at least one shot and all adults
in the US are eligible. It's a dramatic achievement
worthy of celebration, especially considering where
we were just a few months ago. Before the previous president
left office, the vaccine rollout
was in chaos. His administration had passed
on the opportunity to buy more vaccine, and they'd made
all kinds of wild and obviously insane promises, like the time
Trump's Chief of Staff said they'd have
100 million doses by October and enough vaccine
for every American by January. -We use all of our regulatory
tools to bring vaccine available for the entire American
population by January. -You know, in terms of
the number of vials, what we're shooting for
is to try to make sure that we have 100 million doses
in that first tranche, and so those --
that 100 million doses certainly is the benchmark
that we've set. From there, there would be
a second tranche that would get us up to
the 300 million plus doses. That timeline for
the 300 million is set as a January timeline, in terms
of what we're looking at. -He's so cagey. He's talking
about vaccine distribution like he's telling a loan shark
when he can expect his money. [ Nervously ] Yeah, I'm going to
get you your money. I got a job now
and I stopped gambling. No more betting
on the ponies for me. No, siree. When can I have it buy? Uhh... Let's see, the Kentucky Derby
is the first Saturday in May, so the first Sunday in May? [ Normally ] And yes, when Biden
took office and only promised 100 hundred million shots
in the first 100 days, that was clearly
a lowball number, but it made sense to set lower
expectations after the last guys overpromised on everything every
time they opened their mouths. Not only do we think
we will have 300 hundred million vaccines
by January, but we are now closer
than ever to getting every American
the nootropic pill, NZT-48, also known as
the "Limitless" pill, taken by Bradley Cooper
in the film "Limitless". And as a reminder, this is
a pill that will allow us to use our whole brain
with no side effects. At least I think
that's the case, as I will admit I only watched
the first tranche of that movie. Anyway, that obviously
all turned out to be [bleep]. The Trump administration
had no interest in actually overseeing
an effective vaccine rollout, so they just passed it off
to the states and it was, initially,
a disaster. Biden, meanwhile, secured deals
to buy more vaccine, brokered deals between rivals
to produce more vaccine, and quickly ramped up
a plan to use FEMA to set up federally-run
mass vaccination sites across the country, which for
some reason, Trump failed to do. Maybe because he didn't know
what FEMA stood for and was too embarrassed to ask. Sir, we should coordinate
between HHS and FEMA. [ Imitating Trump ]
Right, right, right. The Federal...Elegant... Modeling Agency, is that right? So the models, they would
administer the vaccines -- and only 10s, right? Nobody's going to roll up
their sleeve for a 7. I could tell you that. [ Normally ] But as encouraging
as the vaccine rollout has been here in the US, it's been
much less encouraging throughout the rest of the world,
thanks in large part to vaccine hoarding
by wealthy countries. Global COVID cases
just hit a new weekly record, making this the worst week
worldwide since the start
of the pandemic. And that's why we need a more
just and equitable distribution of vaccines
to developing nations. So far, high-income countries already own more than half of
all global doses purchased, and it's estimated that there
will not be enough vaccine doses to cover the world's population until at least 2023. Meanwhile, the US could have
300 hundred million extra vaccine doses
by the end of July. Let's send those extra vaccines
to countries that need them. We certainly don't need them
here. As a country, we don't do well
with excess. We'll start having raves where Wall Street bros
and social media influencers pass vials of Pfizer
in bathrooms while dancing poorly
to club music. ♪ Shots, shots, shots, shots,
shots, shots ♪ Hey man. [ Laughs ] Hey man, you want a hit of
this uncut Pfizer? You'll have a sore arm for
a few days, but then you'll be
[stammers] sky high. I was thrown by the shots.
It was in the script, but I still forgot
what it would sound like. ♪ Shots, shots, shots, shots,
shots, shots ♪ Now it's coming back. Ah. It's like sense memory,
you know? I was like,
"What is that jarring sound?" And then I'm like, "Oh, right." Da club. Also, it's in our own interest
to share our vaccines as well. If we don't slow down the spread
of the virus around the world, then more variants will emerge, and we can't just stop them
from coming here by increasing the US
in a protective bubble like we're in some Stephen King novel
or The Simpsons movie. Almost identical plots.
Crazy, but it's true. Nonetheless, there's hope
on the vaccine front. So much so that Biden's approval
numbers in a recent poll are as high as 59%, with only 39% saying
they disapprove. And now, as a result
of Biden's early popularity, a weird thing is happening, which is Republicans
are basically admitting they don't know
how to criticize it. After four years of a cruel,
unpopular, crazy person who never won
the popular vote and never cracked
50% job approval or a 50-degree angle
on his spine, Republicans can't quite figure
out how to attack a president who is well-liked
and his policies are popular. John Thune,
the #2 Senate Republican, said, "I don't think
sometimes our messaging is as sharp as it should be,
because a lot of the things they're doing are things
that are popular -- when you're spending money,
you're popular." He added of Biden,
"His tone is moderate and he's an affable person, he's a likable individual, and a lot of us know him,
have relationships with him, and it's probably harder
to attack someone who is relatable
and likable." Relatable, likable,
and doing popular things -- what is he,
some kind of sorcerer? How does he do it? They're watching Biden like
a bunch of prehistoric apes watching man make
the first stone tools. "Well, this isn't going to be
fair now." Remember,
Republicans have only won the presidential popular vote
once in the last 32 years. They're used to being unpopular
and just having the edge because of our unfair
electoral system. They're genuinely befuddled
by a president who's likable,
doing popular stuff, even if it's obvious
to the rest of us. Republicans are so desperate
to criticize Biden, their only move
is to call him a puppet. Yesterday, Fox News interviewed
GOP Congressman Devin Nunes, who, speaking of puppets,
looks like his eyes were hastily sewn onto his face.
Remember that guy? He always looks like
the claw machine dropped his Beanie Baby at the last second. Nunes suggested that
there was actually some secret group
of puppet masters pulling the strings
behind Biden. -The question is, is we don't
see a lot of Biden every day. I don't know, you know --
and of course, nobody's really calling him out on, you know,
what is his schedule? What is he actually doing? I think a lot of us wonder. And we didn't even see him
in the campaign. So, you know, somebody clearly
is behind the scenes controlling the -- building
these narratives out, and they they put their people
out, and their mouthpieces. -It's true. But you never
heard Trump speak or read one of his tweets
and thought, "Who's making him say that?" But come on,
Biden was literally just in the Rose Garden
for press conference with the Prime Minister
of Japan on Friday. I know you guys
only go on "Fox News", but do you also
only watch "Fox News"? I'm guessing anytime
Biden gives a speech, Fox throws to some emergency
standby episode of Jeanine Pirro's short-lived
wine-tasting show, Jeanine
Pinot. [ Imitating Pirro ] Now, the
first thing we always do is inhale the bouquet. [ Sniffs ]
Smells like wine to me! Which means we're on to
step two -- downing it in one big-ass gulp. And to answer your question,
no, you cannot have my keys. [ Normally ] Also, you really
have questions about what Joe Biden does all day? Say what you want about the guy, but he has that energy
of a grandpa who insists on getting up
at 4:00 AM to go for
his daily power walk on the side
of the highway. "Grandpa, just stay
in the cul de sac." [ Loudly ] I like to dodge the
cars. It keeps me in shape. Give me my three-pounders! [ Normally ] Trump, meanwhile,
spent so little time in the Oval Office, they could
have rented it out on Airbnb -- which, by the way, would have
been a great early 2000s comedy starring Owen Wilson
and Vince Vaughn. [ Imitating Wilson ]
Oh jeez, that's a bust of Abraham Lincoln?
I thought that was an ashtray. [ Imitating Vaughn ]
Buddy, buddy, buddy. We got to get out
of here, buddy. I just hooked up
with the Secretary of State and now she won't
leave me alone. We got to go, buddy. [ Normally ] Similarly,
Texas Senator John Cornyn suggested last week that Biden
was perhaps being controlled by a secret group
of leftists when he quoted
a political article about Biden's communications
strategy and added this -- "Invites the question:
is he really in charge?" On Sunday, Cornyn was asked about that tweet
and blamed Twitter. -My question, I guess,
is Senator Cornyn, is that helpful to be
sending out a tweet questioning the -- President Biden's
mental faculties? -Well, Chris, thank you
for the question, because I think there's been
a lot of confusion in the Twitterverse about that. That actually was a quote
from a "Politico" story that I pasted into a tweet, and then I simply
asked a question. -Man, I never want to hear
a man your age say the word "Twitterverse." It's like watching
your dad twerk. "Dad, knock it off. You're
getting loose change
everywhere." That's how at a loss these guys
are to criticize Biden. And by the way,
that's not to say there aren't things to
criticize. There absolutely are.
For example, last week Biden announced and quickly
walked back his decision to break a campaign pledge
and keep in place the historically low cap
on refugee admissions set by the Trump administration
rather than lift it as he promised
during the election. The Biden administration
tried to reverse that announcement
after progressives and refugee advocates
were rightfully outraged. Today, NBC News has learned
the Biden administration intends to keep the cap
for refugee admissions at 15,000 -- this according to a
senior administration official. It is a historically low level
set by the previous Trump administration. -The Biden administration is now
reversing course on its announcement that it
would keep the refugee cap of 15,000 set
by the Trump administration, after facing fierce backlash
for some progressive Democrats. -On Twitter, Representative
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez condemned the decision,
saying, quote, "It's completely
and utterly unacceptable. Biden promised
to welcome immigrants and people voted for him
based on that promise. Upholding the xenophobic
and racist policies of the Trump administration, including the historically
low + plummeted refugee cap is flat out wrong.
Keep your promise." -Pramila Jayapal,
a House member who's the leader of the Progressive Caucus,
saying, quote, "It is simply unacceptable
and unconscionable that the Biden administration
is not immediately repealing Donald Trump's harmful,
xenophobic, and racist refugee cap that cruelly
restricts refugee admissions to a historically low level." -Sources say that
President Biden has resisted raising the Trump-era cap
on refugees because of bad political optics. -Oh, so you were worried
about optics? What's worse
in terms of optics? Breaking a campaign promise
to lift a cruel and historically low refugee cap
set by racist predecessor, or tripping upwards
on the stairs three times? And again, the best part of
the three-trip walk up -- the salute
at the end to save it. Look, we all trip, it's fine. It's like when you eat [bleep]
an icy sidewalk then give everyone a thumbs up. As for the optics, Republicans
are never, ever going to give you credit for anything,
so stop chasing it. Republicans are
like an emotionally distant dad, from the '50s, who sends you
to boarding school where you could get
straight "A"s, But if you're 5 minutes late
for dinner, he'll say something cutting
without looking up from his paper like "You
call yourself an Exeter man?" Voters were craving
competent governments after four years
of cruelty, racism, and neglect, and now they're rewarding Biden
for it in the polls. The left absolutely
must keep pushing him on issues like refugee admissions
and global vaccine distribution, because Biden is clearly
willing to react to pressure from progressives. As for Republicans,
all they seem capable of doing is spending their time
whining in... -The Twitterverse. This has been A Closer Look. ♪♪ God's Love We Deliver cooks
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