Alita: Battle Angel - Nostalgia Critic

this episode brought to you by hello fresh delicious pre-measured ingredients and simple chef made recipes delivered to your doorstep every week [Music] oh yeah you sure change the comic world with that one well I just don't do that the Jamie Lee Curtis dance will be hilarious dark oh yeah it was not the training wheels for that anime he never got off the ground it's amazing it's still alive how could you survive years of neglect it's incredible this movie turned out as good as it did look she's waking up hi well you're a surprise what's your name my name is it's no use she's been in development hell too long I'm sure she'll still kick ass are you planning to regenerate her oh yes she's the most promising anime adaptation I've seen in years [Music] Wow this new body looks great well you deserve it you've been through quite a bit really I I don't remember that's not surprising a lot of people forgot about you for a bit but I never gave up hope I I don't understand well maybe it's best I start from the beginning in 1993 a battle angel OVA was released based on the 1990 manga it was the first anime I ever saw that was meant for adults it was one of those few VHS azat rental stories that had that wonderful sticker that called to every teen like the pie Piper's flute what was a nathan groundbreaking it had memorable characters good world building and some bloody as hell action I was immediately hooked it got me to read the manga opened up a world of anime that was even bigger and better than I imagined and I had this VHS to thank for it I wasn't the only one who was taken by it in the 90s James Cameron absolutely fell in love with battle angel and declared he would one day make a movie out of it but as other projects grabbed his attention some developed some abandoned the film kept getting postponed some projects even served as tests with his show Dark Angel testing the idea of the futuristic action girl and avatar testing if he could CG an entire person to look believable nevertheless it still didn't seem ready and he was constantly distracted by other endeavors it wasn't until Robert Rodriguez stepped in to help condense the script that Cameron realized the only way this was gonna get made as if someone else took the helm and I know I've marked some of his movies in the past but not only is this guy one of my favorite filmmakers but he is perfect for directing this well it had a Cameron look it felt like a robbery cos story super gritty and over-the-top with almost random violence and deaths around every corner it was also a perfect mix of two opposite styles Cameron famously went over budget making some of the most expensive films ever made Rodriguez made several films in his garage so for a future that's supposed to be half state-of-the-art and half low-tech this was a match made in heaven but there was still one question what version of Alita do you adapt the manga and anime were surprisingly quite different with several elements and characters created and other elements and characters cut out - I'm both Aleta ambitiously combined both stories resulting in critics giving it mixed reviews because they thought there were too many side stories and characters making you feel crowded yeah that's called an anime I'm sorry Cameron didn't sell you Fern Gully again but I thought this was a lot more creative and at least acknowledged the source material it was based on this time creating one of the best anime adaptations if not the best anime adaptation ever shown on the big screen Wow so with all that time I must be the most perfect film ever made you are awesome so I'm perfect well you are awesome doesn't that mean I'm perfect funny enough being awesome rarely means you're perfect in fact often it's part of what makes something so awesome that makes no sense okay look I'll go over what's perfect what's not and how they're sometimes to say as long as one of us follow that sentence we should be alright this is a Lita battle angel I know I'm right here though I was talking the audience that time this is gonna be confusing yes it is but I'm used to it by now okay we've been without Dark Phoenix left 20th Century Fox and come across a sort of cyborg doctor and named Dyson Dido played by Christoph Waltz who rummages through all the dead Terminator franchise is coming across something unique it should be pointed out that the attention to detail in creating certain scenes is crazy this isn't surprising seeing how Rodriguez did Sin City which basically use the comics as storyboards but the little touches for die-hard fans really deserves a golfclap he brings what he found to his assistant who I don't mind changing from the original but look at the original that has so much more character to it I don't care if you make him a black woman but go with someone like Whoopi Goldberg that'd be more fitting and memorable what are you dreaming this little angel okay that was creepy and probably belongs in the manga they start off a little creepy too they give her a body and she wakes up with those eyes so people have a lot of thoughts about these eyes and honestly they're all kind of right they are freaky but they emphasize her expressions they're distracting but they also give the character in a film more of an identity oh yeah Lita the girl with the big eyes without that'd be what that robot girl in the future movie there's like a million of those it's not like an anime because everybody doesn't have the big eyes but I think that confirms her as a bit of an outsider the only issue I have with them is that they do distract from what an amazing effect the rest of her is I mean the eyes are obviously CG but the rest of her is too look at the shirt the pants the skin the hair all of that is from computer if she wasn't wearing any of that on set I feel bad as this actress Rosetta Salazar seems to never show her real face in anything she's like the Tom Hardy of animated filters but the effects are so good all her charm shines through she is disgustingly likable in this does anyone ever guard is Oliver we should go that's so good who is that yeah you want to join in if I didn't have reoccurring nightmares with Margaret Keane children eating me eichler cute as a button part of that charm though is also from Walt's it takes whatever adorableness she throws at him and knocks him right back with his own brand of ah taste receptors Oh working she can tell this fruit is from Walmart she can't remember anything not even her name so ego calls her Aleta and shows her around iron City the slums compared to the sky city of zalem just above this place is great because everywhere you look there's something going on it's like a Ren Faire except slightly less embarrassing to be lookout I made cute Elita is kinda ish saved by a boy named Hugo played by Kenan Johnson and despite the still probably having an overshare of exposition it's kind of like fury road in that the storytelling is mainly in the expressions every time I watch this film I see a reaction I never noticed before like look at her expressions here when she's recognized as a cyborg you're a cyborg can I see [Music] there is so much vulnerability shame joy curiosity excitement all in just those few seconds look at Ito's face when he names her Aleta Aleta it's a nice name [Music] don't you just immediately know he had a daughter and that was her name we all got that and it was just from a look if you saw this movie and didn't like it I highly suggest you watch it again and just read their expressions there's so much good acting going on that isn't given enough credit let's begin a witch Aleta becomes suspicious when she hears about murders happening around town and Edo returns with a bloody wrist I heard that guy carves girls up and sells their body parts don't give away my calling card hey kid there visited by Eidos ex-wife cheerin played by Jennifer Connelly hmm House of Sand and Fog trying or Holt phoning it in trying because I'm a doctor and I'm a mother and somehow I forgot that send a fog man saying a fog she meets with Edo disturbed that he's using the body of their dead daughter on Aleta instead of helping her make breakthrough so she can go to zalem I won't help you build monsters gonna get back to solve them somehow meanwhile Lolita meets up with you go and they play a nice game of [ __ ] you ball sorry have a sudden urge to stitch a [ __ ] she ends up winning as well as showing up the guy who hit her your freak girlfriend's got some serious malfunction she's not my girlfriend she is my sex bot and nothing more don't act like that isn't our future Hugo continues to introduce her to all the wonders of the city including of course chocolate because it's always chicks and chocolate you have any chocolate did you say chocolate absolute chocolates Eliza I know women love chocolate but this has been done so much can't we get something a little different like maybe chocolates not that that Hugo reveals that he too has dreams of going to zalem if I was as strong as you I climb that tube dissol um right now hey don't let anybody up there that's what they want you to think and we're all living on a sphere planet right you just can't remember if you could just tell me what those eyes have seen they're literally seeing every pore on your face now I don't think I can take any more how much these eyes can see later that night she sees Ito going out and follows him afraid he might be the killer but she discovers he's actually a bounty hunter aka hunter warrior trying to find the real killer looking for me doctor or should I say hunter warrior it's dr. hunter warrior you just know to get that delivery Rodriguez was like save that line more Rodriguez he looks like a lead I have some mad fighting skills though and she saves itto rip that plead it's cool she once again fights them off and as much as people like to ask why they couldn't make this an R I think the real question is how the hell it's this pg-13 oh yeah different color blood if it ain't red then nothing bled their leader named drew ishka played by Jackie Earle Haley swears revenge and Ito goes to collect the bounty for his kills as he could really did the most work do you do it for the money I take the money otherwise a clinic would have closed Lloyd though by the way you have a giant gaping wound on your shoulders it's anime rules I walk it off with my angst speaking of which Ito reveals what happened to his daughter as a patient of his play bite notion Casper Van Dien broke in looking to steal drugs kinda like the real Casper Van Dien no I like him I won't make that joke the leader couldn't get out of the way fast enough did you ever find peace I found you I'm not your daughter so she may have picked up this movie is very disjointed but every joint is such a good high these are still engaging stories that keep me sucked in there's just maybe one too many of them perhaps if they cut one of them out like welcome like motor boat motor ball is technically one of the story threads that ties everyone together people either work for it or steal pars for it etc that's all good but the sport itself is fine in another movie the effects aren't as impressive as the other scenes it's not that visually stunning and the only real personality I get out of it is dar have been made a more colorful like maybe the Speed Racer movie I might have enjoyed it more but as is it just looks like a Padres run by that carnival from AI I keep expecting Chris Rock's head to say is that we discover Hugo is stealing pars from cyborgs for a businessman named vector played by marshal Ollie but no time for that we got to drive our ice cream truck to an abandoned war zone this ship is from the battle is on this was an enemy ship that lead is usually drawn to and discovers a body inside that big shock fits her perfect hey I found a body that fits me perfect - but I deal with what I can get forget it she tries to have itto install her into the body but he refuses this is called a berserker the most advanced cyborg weapon ever created it was based on a very phallic enemy I put you in this you will have a dick he says it's too dangerous as the body is trained to attack without hesitation despite them now putting together she was most likely an enemy soldier I will never unite you with this body that's fine fine is that a real that's fine or a I'm gonna wake up with my balls inside my mouth fine she registers to be a hunter-warrior and enters a bar for bounty hunters to ask for help finding guru wish God hi doggie he has a look like yeah that dogs so dead I came to ask for your help against our common enemy vishka and defeat him once and for all so this scene is done a lot better in the manga I know I haven't brought up comparisons too much but this does point to the problem of there are one or two many things going on in the manga the first person she fights is Grishka and he rips her apart she's put back together and filled with vengeance discovering that the guy is so dangerous no bounty hunter dares to go up against him this emphasizes not only what a threat he is but the bloodlust that should possibly be feared inside Aleta that's kinda here but there's so many other things going on it's not a big focus even Karishma isn't that threatening as he lost to her the first time they met were in the manga there's literally just pieces of her left so if you're wondering why something never quite felt right about this scene that's probably the reason but typical this film's fashion there's too much cool stuff afterwards to care like the intro of Saban a bounty hunter so slimy only Francis from Deadpool can clam who cut loose meat forever and let me buy you a drink watches I'm a meat man there's McTeague the dog master his biggest problem is having enough left to identify off this so we can collect the van scene we also think he might be the guitar guy from silver hogs but nobody wants to watch Silverhawks to find out well this is a screw head one of our most elite I mean it wasn't bad I just feel like I would put it on my queue and then always find reasons not to watch me get the idea well this is a screw head one of our most intro was amazing though okay uh this of course results in a fight and as you'd expect it's a [ __ ] ton of fun I'm helping meat man mother [ __ ] udo comes in and breaks up the rumble yeah they cleaned up the place but Clarissa finds them and they discover he's been given upgrades I'm only here for the girl tanker meet man away the only one with courage I have seen elfin leader I know where this is going I love it there's something funny knowing that in all the badass advertising with the blood and her eyes it comes from a cute little puppy it's like finding out Rambo got his bow and arrow from a Community College production of Robin Hood it sucks the intensity out a little bit alena goes to fight grew ish go but with his upgrades he carter initially ribs are a limb from limb had enough bleeding for mercy somehow that should have been more cool it is around here that I realize I'm not always as invested as I think the film wants me to be and that is a problem has she said that to ito while they were fighting I'd be like holy [ __ ] that's intense but here I don't really get much of a rivalry between them honestly a more fitting line would be I'll buy your legs off the others come in to save her resulting in IDO having no choice but to give her the Berserker body no one will dare harm me again hey I'm not gonna lie I'm feeling a little bit down I wasn't as invested in that fight as I'd like to be and I'm immediately charmed back in that's the magic of this movie even when it's not great it's still great wow that's amazing so people saw this film like a ton of times right um what was this the second or third highest grossing movie ever well it would begin to make its money back are you saying I wasn't a hit um sit 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to get more details fresh is where it's art so go to hello fresh calm and use the comb nostalgia 60 to get sixty dollars off your first three weeks including free shipping on your first pots with purchase it's an edible piece and seriously go check out those other artists they're pretty good look good hello fresh first like our videos subscribe to be notified about them want to actually be notified about them click on that bell as well also don't forget to check us out on twitch planes and games telling some jokes know for all having a good time hope to see you there [Music] [Applause] some of the visits you go to reveal her new body close your eyes okay but it'll take two minutes does it bother you that I'm not completely human okay well people found this hi you're on the more average side of the spectrum the relationship elevates to watching outside the window he's not cool when Superman does it's not cool when you do it as a leader confesses her love by you guessed it literally giving her heart oh this was a Cameron written scene wasn't it I give you whatever I have what are you doing I knew you're stuffed I'd give you my heart my nose - I can give you that whoa Hugo might be making his way to zalem through his connections with vector so alia tries out for motor ball as the ultimate champion gets sent up there as well try these did you make this for me yes Jesus he makes me wish I was a robot teenage girl but Nova the unseen most powerful man in zalem is pulling strings by rigging the game and also framing Hugo there's no mark rat on me and will be I never killed anyone that was you you know you did that right kilowatt we did pg-13 Hugo runs and Edo discovers all the players in the game are getting paid to take Aleta out they're gonna kill him it's a setup you gotta get out of there again one of my favorite scenes is just a look she's told everyone is against her and she's like [ __ ] good now gone for a transformer salad you pictures are going down despite it not looking real the action is still pretty fun like Robocop playing rollerball rowboat roller ball I got nothing with the face of an angel I'm gonna call her girl they eventually leave the stadium and continue to battle on the streets Hugo calls Aleta for health whatsapp and gets to him first Sharon however shows up having a change of heart and says she can help Hugo is dead wait there's some Futurama [ __ ] going on here trying to steal the bounty violates the hunters code allowing a leader to face Jesus how does the matrix get in our rating but not us I've seen snuff films less violent well thank God you got Hugo the bounty on him is huge Ito tries his best to fix you go up and word gets back that Shirin help them escape I can't do this anymore I'm out what Selita breaks in to get answers she sadly discovers Sharon's fate like dr. Shuren here know the demands body parts for his experiments okay as sad as that is those eyes moving are hilarious I want to hear her little mouth in whatever jar that's in to say Jewish guy attacks and she has a flashback to all the evils aalam has done in the past making her realize Nova is the true enemy you're just his slave and I'm just an insignificant girl oh it's this way you're gonna be like Captain Marvel and play I'm just a girl because something patriarchy I don't know dammit I really thought I could get through this review without mentioning that film pg-13 were NZ seventeen factory enforcers came looking for Hugh Bella she discovers Hugo has escaped and is literally climbing his way to zalem and this is another area where they sadly drop the ball and the other versions Hugo's nice but he's also desperate scrawny kind of a goofball and even has a tragic backstory about how his brother died trying to reach his all on via balloon so when you see him climbing up in a fit of madness you can see it's someone who's gone off the rails hell in the manga he goes on a killing spree before doing so this version is certainly bulkier and a ladies man but honestly was working okay until this scene what should be someone pushed to the edge losing everything from his mind to literally his body is a dude acting like he has to move back in with his mom forget it I'm never going back to that filthy garbage heap he'll always be running along a barrel eater how can I move back in with those people please tell me they're insane there's a bounty on me this is the only way I want to make it clear I don't think it's the actors fault I'm sure he gave the exact performance asked for I just think they went less for struggling skin and bones hopelessness and more the best friend from Boy Meets World it would have had a bigger impact if they kept closer to the source if I go back down there I'm dead come on we have to go back down but it's my Holy Land my Jerusalem there watched by the all scene Nova who coincidentally looks like Cameron message Rodriguez and he destroys hugo off the beach hey you're lighter than I thought lose weight kyouko drops to his death and Aleta valves vengeance on Nova the puppet master behind it all how pissed off is she slices per bone tear in half thanks to me I am Jack's complete lack of surprise and sadly we end on that sequel baiting instead of getting a more self-contained ending what do you mean aren't there a lot more books I'm sure there's a million sequels in the works I mean wasn't this film a big hit well no it wasn't what how is that possible couple of reasons for one the film was difficult to advertise true it had big names behind it but was still very hard and tricky to market second though it did better than many experts thought it would it did not earn its money back domestically and while overseas it did better it's still not enough to see a profitable secret to put it bluntly it's still Rodriguez film and not a Cameron what do you mean usually Cameron films are instant hits whereas Rodriguez films are underground it's building its fanbase of reusing years yeah despite it being one of the best anime adaptations ever it's still an anime weird bizarre and not having a groundbreaking message like Avatar but it's so fun and charming and dazzling and a technical feat but it had a few minor things wrong with it so it sucks sorry them's the breaks I know it's not fair but it's hey where'd you go oh no she isn't oh but she is even know what I'm talking about you were right I don't [Music] and coming blockbusters I'm coming don't try to stop me critic my life is a cosmic joke plateless and unnecessary no movie this so much more to life than being a hit don't you know you mean so much to me and so many other fans we've seen attempt after attempt after attempt of shitty anime remakes and you're one of the only ones to get the spirit look action and charm of the original down I don't know why so many critics focused on the little things wrong with you when there's a million more things right with you but the people love you movie you're following is growing more and more every day it's the first time we've seen this director who spent years making films on dollars and cents finally direct a movie with an amazing budget as well as that losses unique roots and the roots of the source material we can find a way movie begin a new sequel but how you need money Merida it's a Rodriguez film remember he makes films with no money hell he makes a mess his kids birthday presents they can cut the budget in half and he'll still make it amazing and Disney has box now they're always reviving stuff nobody wants to see I don't know if they have to make a lead up Disney Princess or something but I'm not giving up oh and neither should you yeah you're right there is an audience that loves maybe if I just waited long enough I'll grow enough of a following to show the world I'm worth more attention oh just a movie that flaw she was one of us especially didn't even have a happy ending like we did of course not [Music] I mean seriously Disney you made these you also see what we actually want hey Doug Walker here doing the charity shout out out once again we're doing one that ties into helping with Cove in nineteen and this week we are doing ameriCares I don't think we've ever done this one before but it looks like a real good one has four stars on a charity shout out and what they do is they are using every resource to bike over 19 from critical protective supplies to education training and other support for their staff and partners not only here at home but also around the world they are focused on frontline health workers keeping them safe so they can continue to do life-saving work on behalf of patients of kovat 19 and those in need of care for other essential health services and life-threatening conditions in vulnerable communities who suffer most from an often deadly inequality especially in access to health care so this is very much helping PME it's helping as many people as possible but it's especially helping those who don't always have access to what's needed to get better pretty much and as you can see here they're really trying to do everything they can to help those with cope in nineteen and just people sick in general and people people who are really needing alright live right now so sorry I can't talk to they really really do amazing work like I said four stars I'm Charity Navigator check out the link if you can donate fantastic if not spread the word check out the site just see all the good that they do because there's in spite of everything going on there's so many good people that do so many good things and they really deserve the attention man so check them out when you can and hopefully you can give something if not sure the word thank you so much you

Channel: Channel Awesome

Views: 621,181

Keywords: channel awesome, nostalgia critic, alita battle angel, alita battle angel review, cyberpunk, cyberpunk movies, james cameron, movie, film, review, movie discussion, movie reviews, film review, funny review, funny movie review, cyberpunk films, Robert Rodriguez, Rosa Salazar, Christoph Waltz, Jennifer Connelly, manga, japanese manga, alita battle angel movie, alita battle angel sequel, alita movie, james cameron movies, robert rodriguez movies, movie adaptations

Id: oFCgCT6cRTs

Length: 32min 26sec (1946 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 01 2020