Akaash Singh Takes Over Flagrant w/ Trevor Wallace and Michael Blaustein

this is maybe the meanest thing I've done but this is crazy we have it on tape you have it no you don't we have it we have we we look at his face we have it I am so nervous I'm sweating just thinking about this how did you find I've had it oh no I can't watch this dude yeah yeah yeah yeah after this we'll decide if we're going to leave it in what's up guys welcome to flager Andrew is not here he is in Europe right now I am here with YouTube stars in his stead one guy you've been seeing for years another guy who's a brother of mine who's blowing the up so quickly guys give it up for Trevor Wallace and Michael blin give it for thanks for having me but I got my ankles out to pay tribute to Schultz out here so I I'll get a bust out you let love you we miss you Cavs out in your honor dude you got pretty nice Cavs I never seen them before I mean I have seen them but I never really take a like a hard Gander I used to raise a scooter growing up you got a lot of bites there bed bugs bites oh yeah I was in Petty yeah yeah still first I want to make sure we plug stiff socks to podcast you guys do together it's very fun huge patreon yall are killing it you guys talk to a lot of point stars yeah uh I know a lot of people are probably wondering why do we do that the view views yeah yeah yeah no they're actually great I was teasing but what people do really want to know is uh y are single yeah yeah we [ __ ] the point is that what you're asking I did it last night no uh not any point we ever had on the show me neither buit porn you got chemistry with some of them bro I so do he I will say this we have had sex with porn star indep we have independently but never anyone that's been on the show that's C what happens I don't believe that [ __ ] at all that's C that's crazy no they literally coming on I know you want them to keep coming off but that's fine I'm a married man and I would say that instead of no point St would want to [ __ ] me but if I was single and they wanted to [ __ ] I would absolutely so it's like plug talk but you just lie about stuff talk we plug in that's it look here's the thing they think we do but a lot of it is like their friends will DM us like oh we saw you at so and so on I want to go on and then it kind of like starts a conversation and then they're like oh well what are you up to so it's like they friends of the friends but never any of the girls that were on the show we're getting farm league yes farm league ask me yes it's good [ __ ] crazy good crazy Mouse game insane LeBron M like the golf ball cleaner she literally takes my SC and goes it's crazy yeah it's insane dude I said this on the podcast last time this this literally started the first thing we kissed for three seconds and then she start she put her back on the bed and leaned over like a rainbow like that we started started he doesn't know what's happened right I know I got it that's crazy crazy I don't know what I'm saying is like the the the to start there is crazy how did you end just like hugging or something you got to go backwards made on that yeah exactly yeah dude it was yeah that that's that's the it was uh fun it was fun but to answer your question we've never had SE any any one that's been on the show it's fine let them go no it's cool because they want to like show you what they do and they see us as like let me say you ever see somebody on stage bombing you're I can't wait to go up then shows cry what it is I think those girls see that as us they're like we're bombing in bed Me Maybe I don't know he [ __ ] but like this girl like I can't wait to make blow this guy's brain so she does like half what she does on the screen and I'm like oh it like loses it yeah crazy so this is it's incredible you guys are never going to get in a relationship again no I'm I'm out there's no way no no no I say [ __ ] on this podcast like I there's no way there's no way I've seen Blau in a relationship and I've seen Blau single it's unbel unbelievable 18 making vegan cookies with this girl I was like you were [ __ ] in a dump truck a week ago [ __ ] I never so Blau and I for those of you who don't know Blau came up at the Village Lantern with us and I think it's cool cuz like me Schultz you all came up and our crowd word Clips are what people notice yeah yeah I don't know about you I had people being like and I see it on Schultz's thing too oh he must play people in the audience and it's like no you guys don't know we came up in hell we just had to get really good at crowd work that's all we could do so it's so [ __ ] cool I love this but I've known you since like 09 yeah yeah yeah and I remember a story about Blau and this I was just like this is the horniest man I've ever met he met a girl at a show and then he talked to me the next day on the phone before everybody had iPhones and was texting and he was like man I just uh I'm really [ __ ] my dick hurts and I was like I was like what what do you mean he was like what day of the week is this this is a this was a Friday this was a Friday but we had shows at the Village Lantern every day so he was like I was like what happened he was like H dude that girl from the show I [ __ ] her twice last night and then I [ __ ] her again in the morning and I had an audition and I came back and [ __ ] her again and then I just beat my dick in the shower and I God damn back then he was [ __ ] girls's been [ __ ] like he was famous for a long time you go to an audition after coming twice I'd walk in back I don't give a [ __ ] about this role [ __ ] give it to the next guy dud it it was like a craft singles commercial who gives a [ __ ] slit your name [ __ ] shut up and leave can I tell your Amsterdam story yeah of course so we we went out there we did the red light district we dabbled right he gets I didn't dabble we all right I'll did it I dabble [ __ ] the red light for green that night it's a go D though he gets duped on one he gets duped finessed he comes back to the bar never duped on a hooker or what should we uh it was you I I need a little more context what was he trying he got that pyramid SCH hooks she came in with 200 and was like no no go go she came was like it's $200 and then he goes okay and then he goes all right what about this he goes okay it's 300 and then another just give me details dude let's not these These are hor so I'll do this and you and you jump in with the this is a hooker that Trevor's being a hooker to be clear what would say again this what you're talking about sex workers right yeah yeah we went to amsta employee but you did drugs out there so he's still trying to figure out we on the I I just did it how did the air get it's okay it's all right you get no I just cuz they did drugs out there too a lot put that on the Pod so I want to distinguish everybody who saw that clip cuz sometimes we watch our friends clips and sometimes we don't oh okay okay okay so this is not about you guys buying shrooms and doing them on the Pod this is about sex workers this is about sex workers so obviously Amsterdam has a red light district we had to we had to dabble so we went uh I found literally one of the hottest one I ever SE CU when I went I was like they're going to be average they're not dog tense like tense body they look like they're airbrushed and they're not they're so [ __ ] unbelievably hot so I I was going to say found one whatever I found one open up and I was like I found one and I was like uh how much she goes $100 and I was like the [ __ ] I'll give you this you'll spend money on oh yeah so I get in there blah blah blah uh swipe my card and then we get on the bed and then she puts a condom on and then puts uh like a paper towel with a hole in it a big hole around my dick she Pi a big pen it was a big one and then she put uh put it over right and then literally bro so I'm sitting on the thing the most apathetic hand job ever right so she goes she's leaning forward and just goes like this no eye contact nothing right so I don't know if you guys know this I can't get hard at all right so then she looks at me she goes uh do you want me to give you a head and I was like oh yeah yeah yeah then she goes $100 and I go I already paid like spe Airlines you know we're adding on we're adding on you got to you pay for the seat now let me beat that meat 100 bucks so okay so $5,000 later yeah yeah so so we're so we're at 200 right and in my head IO I literally thought of you heyo dick hard not hard actually I thought of you and I was like we're at Amsterdam let me experience this what am I going to be a [ __ ] Jew here who cares swipe it he is a Jew for the I a Jew blin K so I he got his K Card chill we in here so um so I'm like I'm like [ __ ] it let's let's experience this right um and then so whatever it was a thing and then and I still can't get hard right and then she like do want to [ __ ] and then I go okay cut to the chase [ __ ] like let's do what's the bottom line another another 200 I think um and then and then I and I I still can't get a hard because she's not doing anything to a rout there's no connection obviously there's no chemistry obviously right she looks hot but that's it what are your goals and aspiration yeah I mean lit like literally let me read your diary something so so I can't get hard right and then she just stands up she goes well I mean you can't get hard so wow it's over [ __ ] she goes time's up she goes time's up she goes you get 20 minutes in here she goes it's 19 minutes um you got one minute left there's nothing we can really do in a minute right yo she gave you a 19-minute salt job that's crazy I think like some ASMR [ __ ] you know dude I think you're forgetting intermittently of intermittently of that 19 minutes we're doing money transactions and haggling what is so an apathetic hand job and haggling she asking for the CBB you know yeah I mean I'm literally my dick is inside of me right it's the most the most unattractive like situation I've ever been in also again I'm stingy so I'm doing this math in my [ __ ] head I can't get hard what I'm doing is this a text right off I'm I'm texting my wealth manager yeah yeah um anyway she goes yeah and I go I go it hasn't been 19 minutes she goes it has and I go no it hasn't do you know why cuz I I tell time for a living I tell time for a living that's what I said you're delusional because because of standup you generally always know about what 20 minutes is what 45 is what an hour is but an insane thing this girl doesn't speak English he's like I tell time I can feel time I can feel time 16 minutes how long we doing this uh we have been recording 1445 not bad not bad that's not bad not bad it would be hard if we were jerking off right now and and the same time we I told the story too I looked at Gabe who who's our producer on sift socks and I said the time and it was like 47 minutes 47 minutes he was like bro it's like it was like 4615 or some [ __ ] so anyways so I can feel time [ __ ] it wasn't I wish it wasn't just that but it wasn't 19 minutes it it was been seven or eight minutes so I just start fuming I'm like $500 me up at the bar together we got two producers at the bar waiting cuz they're loyal men'll see are loyal man I mine was the easiest $200 Hey Bada Bing Bada Boop we're nothing right and then I'm at the bar waiting for him this guy comes in fing You Know M when he's mad I've never seen him this mad I've never seen him this mad he had the spirit he about to fly home he he was I I told him I was like yo if if there was a ticket presented to me I would have flown home cuz the thing loves more than anything is sex and the thing he hates more than anything is spending money so he just spent a lot of money the thing he hates to not do the thing he loves yeah and I got Bamboozled the Bamboozled thing is the thing that [ __ ] kills me Hoodwinked by a hoe godamn I was so mad so I talk him out it's like we got to get you back out there man you can't this can't be your one amram experience we leave in like a day let's let's get you back out there you know because I it was so fun it it was great so I go we got to get you that too right this is where we all come back full circle to what you were talking about he goes finds a nice lady they get an attraction they're talking oh zodiac signs Capricorn they hit it off yeah and they do that but then he tells me the next morning after he did the fornication he went home and still beat his meat yeah yeah had to get it out yeah I'm sorry no response on that 39 crazy beat the me but like think about that got blue ball finally got one off and then goes back home and goes if anybody's [ __ ] jerking me it's me I think I think that's kind of what it is because [ __ ] is fun but like I know how to pledge myself the best oh you got a problem yeah he's sex addict but I'm a controlled sex addict do you know what I mean like here's no this I'm when blow's in a relationship he is faithful he's like working on communication all the gate things I work on all the time BL does that in a relationship and are destroyed sure yeah p in there and [ __ ] you know beating off is that's still very faithful when you're in a relationship that's what he's doing but a [ __ ] switch flips on and off in single and in a relationship I've never seen anything like it quick question with the first chick is it like when you go to a bar and she's like you want to keep the tab open like how is she upping up the transaction does she stop jerking your [ __ ] off and an account in the corner just I'll tell you what it is it's it's the game I think I'm pretty sure they all play where it's like once I get a man hard he will do anything so once once you wer even hard I wasn't but like in my you were mentally hard yeah so so that's what it was like she gets you hard and then she goes well do you want this and you go yeah so when you say does she take out the machine and be like all right Apple pay it and then oh sh czy a lot of cars are like going through and the shit's not working out you know and also we're yeah it was crazy it's the cuz yeah cuz to tr's point like if you spend $200 at a [ __ ] at a spa in Amsterdam whatever the [ __ ] it's it's going through the credit card machine it the chase is not going to allow you to do another hundred [ __ ] 10 minutes later so it get deined so it's fraud so I'm I'm answering text message from Chase yeah it's all good I'm trying to get blown it's like dude everything is the most unot thing yelling in the cor customer service C Service I'm about to n yo why don't you just go with like a high class spend a little money it's done dude it's business what do you mean like there I'm sure there's high class hookers in Amsterdam it's like it's $1,000 for the night and then you just have know we didn't know and I'm telling you I know what you're picturing like they like can I be honest I've been to the red light district and it [ __ ] sked me out dude it's not disg it was disgusting thing it's like and then the guys have the creepiest [ __ ] looks when they're going in it's just like oh god dude this is all gross dude the the funniest thing ever is when fine but like just pay and have it in a private thing when I came out of the second one I was all nutted I got nut out and the woman was nice and then the moment I the moment I come out there's a [ __ ] fan from the podcast be like BL this the moment and you feel horrible dude like you don't feel great coming out of there you know what I mean anyway straight into the mix there just hundreds of people it's like a parade of horniness and you're like how do I is there a back entrance and you're like YouTube Superstar I hat hood on I'm I'm I'm looking low I was on my phone be like where's the tax yeah is this for lift and then I just s you got a phone charger all right here's cash app but that was the funny thing is like amst we were uh he was getting recognized obviously more than me but like we were all getting recognized and then we went to AA or Bea whatever the [ __ ] and we're like all right hell yeah this is like ho Central yeah zero people [ __ ] knew who we were zero like I'm talking about like they wouldn't even look at us it was such a [ __ ] disparity between two places they didn't give a [ __ ] was hilarious we got a boat he he was so nice he rented the the the company a boat that great no ho one guy the whole timer there three days goes yo YouTube shorts oh [ __ ] right now Dam you got a yach with no dude and here the Y no hose is a crazy we had a yacht no hose and there was a boat there's this big ass boat was it was wasn't even a nice boat chock full of hoes the most hoes I've ever seen on one [ __ ] boat in my life cap zero want to get on a boat no one wanted to get on a boat oh my God zero they look like the picture of the Giants where they had Tims and [ __ ] like that like yo we fly on this boat with no what's funny is we were justifi like you know man it's just that's what we need just a trip for the boys nobody is more like reflective on their own life than a guy with no ho like man wish we needed just the boys out you know what they're just going to get in the way do what they're going to give us head who cares we don't need that we just need hoose we just need us and cheesecakes yeah jerked up after red light district that's crazy J off again had sex four times with a girl within 12 hours or whatever and then later that night was like I need a fifth but do you think five nuts in a in a calendar day is crazy guys tour dates I'm going to be in Atlanta October 27th through 29th hurry up and buy your tickets cuz they're going fast December 1st and 2nd I'm going to be in Portland but judgingly against my will I hate that City but I have a feeling they have great comedy fans because you're probably tired of living there with them antifa idiots so tickets available on my website for that also December 8th New Orleans is one of my favorite cities I've ever been to I'm excited to go back and perform comedy and UK I got to announce these dates because tickets are almost sold out Glasgow December 17th London December 18th and Manchester December 19th also last announcement I promise January 18th through 20th DC Improv hurry up and buy your tickets for those shows and more at Akash sing.com now let's get back to the show is beo still that high it's pretty high it just it depends on like it's very situational like if I'm in a relationship n i mean do you guys know too we have no idea what you mean we [ __ ] all the time right a no i' be harassing the [ __ ] out I love it dude I love it you at least huh she getes me one and a half at least all right you know I mean and a half a week you have you ever seen those sitcoms in like the 90s or whatever married children where just never wants to have sex with his wife uh well well actually I'm I'm thinking like the inverse actually when the dude's always trying and the woman's like he won't leave me alone blah I think it's just I think it's always so funny well I mean you're going really against his point of mine but like but like the the that's never the like the girl's like okay you want it it's like dude it's the you have do you have the same you have the same [ __ ] right that I've been [ __ ] for three years then I'm good I'm good it sounds mean but like I'm good that's what you need the new new that's why I'm a maniac when I'm single cuz it's all new hey future blow girls this what you got to look forward to yeah you need that you're the only person I would suggest a will Jada situation yes you need a Jada who doesn't really love you and it's like oh do whatever you want to do and I just want to capitalize and be famous next to you that's perfect speaking real quick I'm going to pitch my idea and to see what you guys think about this but i j was I was I sat next to J on the flight here this onead this one yeah how many dudes was she with we we had the we had the individual pods first class ho and oh yeah she was she was the Pod next to me she dude you did you say anything what am I going to say let me see the [ __ ] I mean I don't know we were respect it you could probably she's she's uh I don't know if you guys ever seen her person dude she's seen before she is she looks better in person than she You Can Tell She's a beautiful woman you can also tell she's a succubus who probably sucks the soul out of people and to look better you know what I mean these are things that you can just tell by looking like you like Soul suckers right I think you need that yeah yeah I mean you're gonna fall apart if anything like dude she took Will Smith you remember Will Smith was when we were children yeah he was a [ __ ] he was a superhero [ __ ] the movies he was a superhero and now he's a broken he looks like a homeless person that I wouldn't give a dollar to yeah I mean he not I just don't give money to I saw his last post he's just sitting on a boat and he looks so sad I mean of course he does like what resents his success just think that's so I didn't see the post what is it you know I needed some guy time it was good to reflect on the boat that's what you need sometimes what do you do if you're Will Smith right now what is the play What's the move you just Coast off you have to [ __ ] someone very publicly like someone bad like Marvel Robbie again that she's married so that'd be disrespectful but somebody that level of hot and then just we're going to be public this time I'm not doing this [ __ ] no more he he just needs a banger of a movie Just Like Music is true yeah if he puts out a movie that's a banger he's back I think he needs a [ __ ] dude I think he just need to switch it all up one up I've heard there's rumors about him and yeah we just come out yeah but I mean I don't believe everybody at that certain level of fan there's rumors though battle shouts to real friend of ours he he would be like if you ever hear I'm gay be happy for me that means I made it he was like that's it that's the [ __ ] compliment you get the greatest compliment you could get well what do what do we think it is do we think it's like just tired of this sounds so crude but bear with me do we think we're is because you get it so often you're tired of it or do you think you you have those feelings even when you're a kid you just can't we're not you act on it not not [ __ ] that much I'm saying I'm saying that like when you get to when you get famous Smith right yeah you just get so the theory some people have is you get so much [ __ ] you're like well let me try something different I can't imagine that James Hand of rest in peace very funny comic he had a joke that he was like Hey can somebody just let me know what that number is so I can stop two before that I'm good at certain point the odometer yeah I think I'm I think I might be headed there here's the thing man cuz I'm I'm getting I'm getting can I tell you I hate your hair so much this is my first time seeing in person this is my first time seeing in person and I truly hate it like I really hate it got to be honest that's a new thing with Comics having bad hair now you got Shultz you got this guy they're just battling you're going be selling out Arena soon yeah I feel good I'm fine with it um anyway so I'm a cuck is what I'm trying to get to why why the hair I honestly there's no I wish I had some cool reason like oh I Got Fingered in Amsterdam and I just changed me or whatever I don't have a cool story you just want I just wanted to do something different that's fair enough and I liked it we want on the topic that we just talking about you want to do something different what's his name but that's what I'm saying the the whole like the whole like cuck thing is not not appealing to me I think I want to watch like a CU through like like you know they have hockey through the rink like the glasstic I don't want to be like a sportting event you know that does sound fun got a CO light I'm just watching [ __ ] go honey yeah oh like oh like actually I hate that don't I just don't I don't come on what don't do the bid right now just be honest that that's kind of weird what not it's not my it's not my cup of tea yeah so here's the thing I'd rather be guy [ __ ] oh I know I can I talked about it before I'm very open with this so the the thing that actually that intrigued me about it is I like if I'm hooking up with a girl I like when she sends me a video of her [ __ ] or getting [ __ ] by like her ex or getting [ __ ] by whatever like another man this you that addicted to porn I'm I don't know I'm I'm addicted I would to say I'm addicted I just like different stuff I get bored of porn it's just the same old same old so that's like like home movies are more excit it's a more it's a more interactive and the thing is like I always watch like the POV stuff obviously because I like to put I'm like oh I'm that guy I'm that guy right yeah so with that movie then I can actually have sex there's no race in the cuck stuff W be able to relate got that makes sense I got you now now I get it I'm with you now okay that all makes sense now so whatever so the so yeah so those videos that they send I can put I can put myself in the video because I've had because I have had sex with the girl so I can put myself in the video so I know that's not a full cuck thing but I'm I'm very turned on by that so I think I might be dipping my toe in it is what I'm saying I don't I haven't I've never experienced but I but I'm there's an intuition that I have that I might be into it there's something hot by being like your girl comes back and she her makeup's running and I go yo what happened huh that wasn't me somebody else did that but that messing me in the long run CU now if I'm doing that and she's not having those similar effects I'm in my head if I'm beating up and it and it's not the same yeah I mean there is a certain confidence it takes in your dick game to be like somebody else can [ __ ] you and I'll just watch and be fine with it yeah there's I think it's that but also I think it's just like it's a hot like proposition are you none none of no think you [ __ ] too much you're getting to that point oh no yeah I'm there but we're time it all back to the beginning but you're the one [ __ ] I'm the one [ __ ] so this this doesn't appeal you at all zero I mean like less but I'm I'm curious though like how far away from the [ __ ] are you like are you right up close valid question play for where you in in in the studio seat or you're in the rafters that's what I'm saying so I don't know free throw line three-point line no charge this is a great this is a great question I don't know if I want I don't know if I want to be in the room so I don't know so I don't know exactly what this distinction would be he's just a director watching on the monitors and [ __ ] no but like I action I mean performance you guys [ __ ] I'll be in video villain um yeah I just I don't I don't know if I want to be in the in the action uh but the idea of her coming back after getting [ __ ] and we talk about it and that arousing me to want to [ __ ] her again that's super hot to me and maybe that means that that's hot to me but also in my brain that means that I can do the same thing so maybe why that's another cuz it lets you cheat correct so that might be another ingredient in the soup as well this is fascinating see if I was like gu i' come back 15 years I've never known him less than I know him right now this is this is new this is new yeah this is like a bless year I'm processing this oh so then it does actually grow I think it does yeah so then you're on your way to that's that's what I'm saying I said I said this six minutes ago maybe hey man going to be a s Toler in 3 months if I can sell the O2 Arena great yeah fair enough they did great door deals there dude what what Goode I was going to talk to you because you mentioned selling out uh blow and I again know not no selling out like venues blow and I's blown up so much in the past like three years and it's so [ __ ] cool and I don't know there's something I wanted to give you your flowers on I don't know if people know how hard you hustled when you didn't have money like there's a story I think we told it on patreon years ago I don't know if you remember Blau couldn't get booked I was in a similar position I couldn't get booked but what Blau did was he would email comedy clubs pretend to be an agent what was his name Chris Chris McCormick Chris M that man yeah yeah yeah yeah and he would send it to comedy clubs across the country and then some of them would book he'd send on behalf of Michael blow with the Reel and everything and sometimes he'd get booked and then that's just what it is like this guy has [ __ ] hustled man SE used to do with lime wire he used to change it to like like a like Taylor Swift and it would just be cranked at yeah you download the [ __ ] is this and what is this yeah oh man and so it's very cool just again as a brother to watch you and the what feels like the past six months it just went crazy prob six months so it's very cool to watch and I just want to give you love publicly on that thank you man yeah it's uh he kind of s me a blast patreon just sort of talk about like where I was like when I first got to like New York and then where we're at now it's a really it's a it's a wild it's a wild transition well I knew that BL we thought was going to take the [ __ ] off in like 2010 or something because he was on Punk Yeah we actually have one of your your videos that we could pull uping yeah it's you punking um Chloe Kardashian with Miley andw Sano on it we could pull this up and play is that fat Chloe or skinny Chloe which one uher CH big but she's actually if you watch it we'll watch but she's actually like so [ __ ] likable through this SC she's really being sweet just watch that's young dude look how young he is so you go to Miley's house ask if you can use a bathroom as a delivery boy as a delivery and then he's just screaming now so can we pause real quick shut up so this is there any backstory that we need to know any like cool info about this how do they tell you what you're going to do when do you find out what's that whole process like dude this this show is actually crazy man because you find out so last minute cuz you're not I'm not writing on it so I'm just kicking it and you get like an email or phone call and they go meet me at the studio and you have to like just sort of be on call and you meet there and then they just tell you what it is and when you got there Miley's the host she's pranking people punking people is she in there with in the studio like is she involved in all of it um I mean like vaguely it's a lot of like the what it's a lot of the writers doing it you know um but it's a it's a very like go go go type thing cuz ever like these people are hyper famous obviously so their schedules are so insane so when they lock things you have to go so it was a very like there's no like time to think sort of and they like told me what the bit was sort of like on the way to the house like it's a it was it's and then the thing that really [ __ ] me up the most in this show is the go goo but also the earpiece so there's a earpiece there's a director talking to you there's a prod anep talking to you and some of the actors like Santino helped write a lot of these he's so funny and sers so funny and a lot of this he's like he's also in video Village talking to me so there's like three people walking me through stuff and they might throw me some lines and I have to decide if I want to say the line that's in my head or the line that they're saying and it's a there's a lot of things that are and then you also also you're trying to play it cool you don't have an earpiece in there correct and you yeah exactly you also have to like and is the earpiece it's got to be super subtle right it's super subtle can we can we play out and see how the rest is Al you haven't seen this right no this is great so the prank is he has his nut caught in the zipper right it's like sing out is caught in the [ __ ] zipper art it's an art ball so it looks real so here's rest went to the restroom and accidentally she's like really talking to she's like being very sweet and any kind of seminal fluid coming out of the genitals is there any was so cute and she's like is there any fluid coming out like she's like being really what color is the genal right now I mean it looks a little red are we talking like salmon pink does it look salmon pink and color Miss seen penis before I don't know I've never seen a white penis before so sincere yeah she was super nice to dude that made T she's so likable on that clip cuz she's like genuinely concerned about your Tes whereas I think a lot of girls would be like I don't buddy deal with ran away yeah I think my wife would be like you got that you [ __ ] weirdo you got Kaiser called Uber figure out 100% she's always with the coolest Kardashian that's that's actually so sweet did you talk to her after what like do you have any interaction she say anything to you good job let me see the real nut I think they they all kind of like shuffled off pretty fast like once they're like hey it's Punk they don't really care about me right they're just it's her it's her and Miley and uh the what's Kelly Osborne so they're all like homies and they're not going to be like hey do you want to come out but they didn't really talk to me did you get to work with Miley a lot she's again the head of the episode and uh three the yeah because everyone everyone host one episode and then they have three EP or three punks within one episode so I think that was the only one I work with m Molly's cool as [ __ ] really so nice dude ah it's great to hear so nice and her husband at the time hot oh the hemw boy hottest family in the world I think it might be she was with a she was where a hels with I don't remember which one not not the not the Chris not Chris no no that's both of them are pretty you know yeah they don't who is Chris with cuz what a lucky lady somebody deserving I hope like his hammer getting there quick I feel was so funny about this if you were just how hot it was and then you're going to [ __ ] on me you 3 seconds ago this the hottest film life he's a piece but you're gay oh man that's what we do that is what we do but I remember BL going out to that and then so I did whing out and I was telling him how stress CU wilding out is similar stress you find out the night before who the guest is you don't know what the [ __ ] game is going to be there's like a boot camp for two weeks where they just drill you to death and then I was telling that to blow and he was like thank God somebody finally understands what pun was like he cuz I was we're broke as [ __ ] so we're thinking blow on Punk this is crazy it's about to take the [ __ ] off and then he was just like yeah it was cool but it wasn't the most fun dog it was not it there was moments of fun for sure but it was just so it was so stressful and it's a very it's like operated I mean I've never done SNL so I don't really know but it operates very much like that where it's like you're not guaranteed episodes yeah so like they'll just call you or they won't and then so you just I'm just in La for there might be I mean there was a time where like two weeks straight I didn't hear from them so I'm just in La broke his [ __ ] supposedly on a show yeah but I I haven't done an episode in two weeks so it's a mind [ __ ] and the funniest thing I think I told you this TR the funnest thing was we had I had like screen test so I had to come into LA and then they were doing a bunch of like improv games with me blah blah blah and I was in the Creator's office and then Ashton comes in yeah and he opens the door and he goes uh goes oh so so you're you're the kid huh and I was like uh yeah and he goes all your addition tape man wasn't good God damn and then just leaves that's that was just Le maybe you weren't 15 years old enough so I'm happy you wrote that [ __ ] letter was he cooler after or was it just that he was a little here's the thing he was he was actually super cool and he was so honest which I thought which I like yeah like there was we at the rap party we talked a few times he was very cool but at the rap party and this is where the honesty comes in I walk up to him hey man what's up how are you and he he looked at me he goes do do you really care and I go damn and I go no not really he goes okay and just walked away I know that sounds like he's an [ __ ] like an [ __ ] thing to do but for some reason I'm like I kind of like that it's very New York yeah cuz I cuz I I honestly don't care where's your wife oh man that's good wow he's a dick so what how did that help kind of like sign fish where it's like you know it's like oh you understand it but it's still like you didn't have to go meet this guy and be like oh yeah your audition tape sucked and just like leave I think it was unnecessary I do I told I've told some people this and they all sort of say the same thing like they were like playing they were playing mind games like I think it was a very like mind gamey thing to do hate that like would do that [ __ ] it's like for what me what would they do well they would just be they would tell you it's like a two we boot camp and I'm dude top to bottom the cast wild andado always say this most talented group of people I've ever seen insane but they'll be like okay write a song on this and I don't I didn't grow up writing [ __ ] songs rapping whatever but then they'll tell you this determines how many episodes you get and then he'll the guy would just say [ __ ] like I guess some of y'all going to be losing episodes I guess some of y'all and they just like hold that thing over your head for 2 weeks I my confidence got worse and worse and worse and one thing I did I reached out to the guy like went to the hotel where all the wilding out people were standing like dude like 3 days before we started filming I was like my confidence has never been lower I don't know what the [ __ ] is going on here and then he like coached me through that a bit but if I didn't take it upon myself to go hey man yeah I this is a big opportunity and I know it and I need help that it just a constant like we don't give a [ __ ] you you sink or you swim yeah and I think it's like they they do that because they need you to be like a strong minded person because they spend all this money on these on these things on these like sketches I mean are punks and if you break or you [ __ ] up like if they if whatever at some point if some famous person knows that you're punking them you just lost the company so much money so you have to like they I think they have to kind of [ __ ] around with you to see if you can sort of handle it yeah you know because I I I'm not gonna Trust some kid I just met two days ago with essentially some of these things were like really high production it's like 400 $500,000 on a production of like some wild thing it's like bro we have to know that you can that you can like handle the heat or whatever sorry I was goingon to you know you finish the point I I was just going to say like I I would have I would have handled it differently I think you can middle like middle of the road it yeah you know but I mean I don't know that's what it did it and this show was you know stupid successful so they obviously know what the [ __ ] they're doing Trevor when you're doing sketches are you bullying everybody I'm too much of a [ __ ] man I need to all go to speak up like you know that's fine we'll just go with that edit you know maybe you were right you have a Creative Vision it's very different though but that's why I like I got two guys I work with on the day today and it's just TI it's just boom boom boom so videos are great there's very few straight to camera there's like a handful of straight to camera people that I think is funny one Indian kid named sah Singh funny uh your sketches are funny and then Ryan Davis who I think you know but he'll just talk to the camera and it's like Vlog type [ __ ] but it's so good with very few edits which is really impressive thank you so much man people just want to be talk to you know what I'm say it's like they just want to be like in there how do you decide what the thing is cuz you'll have the most random [ __ ] and it'll be so funny like the guy who never left his hometown is one of your biggest videos on YouTube I and it's so funny and I guess that makes some sense but there's some like the Kyle guys named Kyle like that was timing that was timing there people the guys named Kyle were starting to get a lot of [ __ ] knowbody made a video on it so I just kind of like saw this like starting to Bubble I think every like big video is trying to like a wave and it's like if you start like Tiger King I made a video right right when that kind of hit and I'm not like a trend Chaser too much but same with the white claw [ __ ] if you get it right before it breaks you you're the first to break it I mean sorry to interrupt the white claw thing for people who don't know Trevor and I remember you telling me about this I knew him I knew you threw him for years before he metre but Trevor when white claws was popping he had made a shirt that said there are no laws ain't no laws when you're drinking claws ain't no laws when you're drinking claws it sold crazy video that you made and and they sued him stupid ceas and deist he had to stop selling the shirts immediately give back all the money I made Z Yeah there pie but then apparently his his profile I heard you say on another podcast went crazy after that like it was it was like a catch 22 I don't even know what that means but I think it was but it's one of those where like so they saw the video and then they're like let's talk Wednesday to talk about a potential brand deal right and I go all right cool but the video is Boing right now I'm a [ __ ] I'm a business guy I'm like 25 at this point I'm just hopped up on ad I'm like let's get these t-shirts out right I had a guy alter the logo slightly put it up on sale Monday morning and it sold like 7,000 t-shirts in like 48 Hours yep there it is that's probably of [ __ ] M kiosk in West Palm Beach right now but yo this is this is still everywhere dude everywhere people have that tattooed on that yeah people people have I'd say I've seen at least how did you know and again this is this I spoke to Gabe asking him things about you and he said Trevor is brilliant at knowing when a trend like what's gonna be v he's really good at that I also think I'm sorry to cut you off dude I also think the other piece of your Genius though is to pick things that are so nuanced that I don't think people make videos on but I think so you can be original still it's yes it's it's originality but also it's like this thing where like the how do I say this like you pick a thing that like that seems nuanced but everyone goes oh no I relate to that but it's like such a small thing but everyone still relates to specificity specificity in com is always fun it's always a specificity specificity in com is always funny if you go like I was bang to chicken a restaurant that's whatever you go I was banging chick at a Buffalo Wild Wings like the specificity of it is so funny and your videos are very specific exactly so like I did a videos about like guys who drive Subarus that could have just been guys who are mountain men nature guys but it's like it's too broad but you define it it's like how is this how is somebody going to tag their friend in this and be like dude this is you or this is Deborah who drives this [ __ ] right so it's like it's getting that angle the white Club one was random I made an hour and a half with my friend Chad at I was living at home at his apartment and uh that was a random one and then I was literally I'm just so half my shit's written half it's Rift and I was like what rhymes with law uh with claws what [ __ ] take a letter off laws yeah I just said that and that just hit and that was all the quotes in the videos and I can always that's what I do for my videos if I'll do like a seven five minute video or whatever and then what to post on the one minute I'll just be like what are people commenting cuz that's that's what's the most popular po a five minute yeah and then I let the people comment what they [ __ ] with you know I'm crowdsourcing essentially yeah and then I'll be like okay cool these are the top comments these quotes are clearly the funniest cuz people uploaded it and then I make that one minute but then everybody was quoting that so I put that t-shirt out and the shirt was like a funny just because the so you made a full video that line happened to be in it what was the full video about it was just guys who drink whiteclaw it was it was just one of things was just like not guys who drink seltzer or but they were just everywhere it was like my roommate uh right before I moved back home for like a month he was just like this my one of my best friends Jason he's just like a just a guy just a Golden Retriever with a Zin in his like but like when he he was like my like barometer like what is like trending because he' be like so pumped on he be like I [ __ ] love spikeball I love Hydro flash I love white claw and I'm just like you are like America as a person so if he [ __ ] with it I know it's Global you know so he was like my barometer on that so he showed me white claws I just made the video pumped it out and then it went crazy and I sold those t-shirts Monday morning to Tuesday it went crazy literally it had like $100,000 in sales but it was a print on demand so so I had made a doll yet but it was racking up racking up and then white CLA out with their legal team and they're like Hey listen we know that you haven't sent these to the printer yet so if you you know return this and you cancel right now we'll talk on on Wednesday to talk about a potential brand deal and then on Wednesday they go we don't think this is going to be a good fit I got [ __ ] duped wow and the most [ __ ] which I don't think I've talked about a lot is they came in they said we'll return all the t-shirts but if you want we can take all since you have the emails of everybody who bought a t-shirt we can send them Official White claw merch like don't [ __ ] use me as your billboard yeah and also they're going to take those emails for marketing like their own I hate as ay they're terrible dude this I was at the airport recently two people came up to me that work for whitecloud like can we take a selfie and I was like I don't like you guys did you say no I said no I said I do not like you guys I said I do not like you guys your company's I mean these people are younger so I think that they weren't around during that part of because this was like four years ago that part of the company history but I was like you're a terrible company yeah like you [ __ ] me over and I put you guys so far on the map yeah and also the asking for everybody's email bothered me that's the it was that it was that it was like hey we're going to take all that we're going to take your customers and give them just Official White CLA merch it's like that's not funny nobody wants to wear just a white CL t-shirt they wanted to wear it because it was a joke on it yeah and they probably wouldn't even send them [ __ ] they just wanted the emails that's where I'm grossed out by bro the but my ticket sales after that were crazy that's when I really started selling yeah is it I was doing like one nighters and then that happened I had my first weekend in [ __ ] Rochester and it was sold out comary Carlson whatever and I was like oh [ __ ] that's that video did things so everybody in his audience has white claws he like clubs will be like dude what is wrong with your audience we went through like [ __ ] five pallet of this [ __ ] like cool give me a cut of that too no but I will say it's like that part sucked but looking at the bright side it just brought awareness to me so like at the end of the day I'm happy with it for w not to use you as a as like their spokesperson is crazy dumb but maybe that's good it maybe it's because then because then it's like maybe you don't want to be like just pigeon holding just that yeah it worked out for you but they're done these people don't get it they don't yeah their photos are all like in like black and white like film Noir like people drinking I'm like you don't understand your audience your audience like butt chugs it like an FSU tail like this is not [ __ ] C me off a skateboard you're like doing a [ __ ] black and white yeah think it worked up talking about it but I do think overall it helped me grow so much so at the end of the day if you still want to sponsor me did you always have that sense or was that all death CU travel Alex you know you remember all def digital huge YouTube channel the only white employee they had I was there Jim Jim Carry essentially from like Liv callor right yeah were you brought on as talend or brought on as like an editor I was a social the social media intern and then they knew I did stand up but it was kind of like all right and then slowly over time it was like all right you G have one line in the sketch yeah all right now you have two oh oh [ __ ] all right let's get this guy in a in an unscripted thing let's see how it is so it's like a slow Progressive thing but then they started putting me in a bunch of thing and then I just be kind of became like a cast member but I was on full-time salary doing social media sorry for those of you haven't seen all def it's great if you ever go to watch roast me that is like yeah if you're watching from YouTube roast me like that is like like watching that live like that is hands down the funniest people I've ever seen in my life but yeah so so I I got it was like the best job I think could have had out of college CU I just working with all comedians like Doughboy who was also wilding out Kev on stage to he more tony Baker just all like very very funny on and off stage yeah because I was I was a fan of Kevin on stage and like I saw you before I knew who you were you know because of those said I texted keev about you he said I'm the first guy that probably took TR on the road my first road show I did we did Tennessee state University and only white guy there for quite some time but he was so like he took a moment and looked in the middle distance but was [ __ ] up was we were driving through these gigs and we we're driving through like Kentucky and they see a Confederate flag they look at me I'm like don't [ __ ] look at me those are my people dude hey also stop I need to say what's up that is my uncle but yeah he was the first guy to take me on the road and they were doing one nighter man one was in a comic Club one was in a church uh I love those guys I am so thankful for that you think those guys helped you a lot uh with your business sense of things so you have a very very like clean business sense just yeah I mean it's it's yeah I think so because I I would see Kev on stage go do one NS on a weekend do Friday Saturday Sunday and then be in the office Monday morning and I'm like you [ __ ] took a red eyee from nework and now you're still at work like Andy had two kids and I ask him like how do you do this he goes I got two kids and a wife I got to feed people you know I got to like keep it going and just seeing that work EIC and hustle and he was still he bro Kev on stage is the hard hardest working man I've ever met in my life he records videos he's a business genius I oh my god when we used to work at all this digit he record videos in his car right just like put it on like a magnet and then he would just rant about whatever's going on in the news like he was talking about the the Jada stuff something he would rant on it for five minutes get in the office cut it down to 30 seconds it' be up on everything before I'd be even at work crazy and I mean the guy just he and like seeing him in uh traveling in airports with him back in the day because I only knew him from work we'd go to lunch a few people like oh Kev Kev in the airport everyone's like [ __ ] Kev I'll say sh so it was so cool to see and I was like that's my mentor and everything like he is a genius and I so I think to that point yes they definitely show me like the ways and I remember the day I put my uh quit I was like how much money do you have uh saved up Kev because he was leaving too and he told me he goes how much do you have and I told him he's like oh bro [ __ ] leave what are you doing here still what were the numbers uh he said he saved up like 60k to leave and I had 20,000 in the bank so I was starting to get a little bit of YouTube money and I was very very very little starting to get paid for stand up I was like I think I had like 20,000 my overhead was 800 bucks I was living in Santa Monica three bedroom apartment he got two kids it's a different thing bringing her back to Will and Jada Kev on stage and Mrs Kev on stage who I've never met in person but watching them that's what I wish Will and Jada was where like their book is called marriage be hard they met when they were both 15 yeah met when they were 15 still seem very in love but never front and act like they're perfect yeah what happened I miss some we 15 so hot is hooking you up with UFC tickets if you're lucky uh okay all right guys we're going to take a break real quick because Morgan and Morgan might make your dreams come true if you're a UFC fan first of all you already know Morgan and Morgan America's largest injury Law Firm recovered over $15 billion for their clients and we know submitting an injury claim with Morgan and Morgan is free and super easy but did you know that they are also the official injury Law Firm partner of the UFC you don't believe me well check this out UFC 296 coming in hotter than anything you've ever seen crazy card Morgan Mor has giving you a chance to watch it live they're going to give one lucky winner two free tickets to UFC 296 to see Edwards versus Covington and $2,000 you get tickets to an event in Vegas and you get $22,000 to gamble with entering to win is easy just text flagrant to four that's the number four the people again that is 484 4 373 6753 and when you do that you get a chance to win $2,000 and two tickets to UFC 296 in Las Vegas again text flagrant to for the people again that's 484 373 6753 also I have to say there's no purch necessary open of 4 continuous United States NDC 4 18 plus the swe states ends in November 2023 offal rules visit Morgan UFC 296 sweep ppa.com now let's get back to the show all right guys we're going to take a break real quick because I got to let you know about vessie shoes let me tell you something I swear to God I have them on right now I had to come back the day after we recorded to do these ads and it was raining and I was walking so I put on my vessis they are 100% waterproof and you don't have to buy ugly ass [ __ ] rain boots you still get to wear fashionable shoes and they're 100% waterproof if you don't believe me check out their new sneaker called the Soho fire as [ __ ] 100% waterproof you ever seen a shoe that looks cool and is waterproof probably not probably not these do it vessie Soho if you don't want to wear clunky ass rain boots wear your vessis they are truly super comfortable I walk like three miles in them just now you know what else is great if they get dirty mine are a little dirty they're in the rain you know I'm going to do tonight throw them in the washer I don't think about it come out 100% clean and spotless so if you're like me and you want to be ready for anything rain or shine head to vessie dcom flagrant and get yourself a pair today and if you use the code flagrant you will get 15% off your entire purchase and you get free shipping to Canada the US Australia Japan Taiwan Korea and Singapore let's get back to the show you guys want to drink oh this is another thing blow I never did [ __ ] when we were homies forever can we talk about this yeah yeah yeah got me high for the first time great first time ever high ever I took a Delta one time and it wasn't like I was fully high but then with Rogan I was like I've already done Delta eight so let's just smoke weed and when he gave me a little pressure I was like yeah I'm not that opposed to it and I think my main fear was always I don't trust my work ethic if I start getting high all the time especially but now I'm like I know I'm going to bust my ass so I can get high every once in a while I still don't drink but if you want to drunk Blau is the best dude can I tell you a story about drunk Blau we got drunk after a show he did in his hometown I forgot about this and then afterward Blau gets drunk he's celebrating it was me Schultz and Blau and Blau headline had a [ __ ] ball whatever great show great audience and then blow gets drunk and then we go to like some random [ __ ] Diner and then blob's drunk and he keeps standing up from the diner table and going excuse me ladies and gentlemen I have an announcement who is trying to get fingers what city is this in DC that's a normal night in DC you miss the best part there's a diner I'm not let's say a 100 people I stand up and I make them all shut up it's 2 in the morning I go guys guys please please everyone please I have announc can you please stop just real quick would you have the glass in the night essentially I was like who's trying to get fingered and I did it like twice yeah no he did it three or four times and then one guy F guy tried to fight you cuz he just got you know guys get jealous when they like go out and [ __ ] and this guy's getting attention so he it's so funny because he was such a [ __ ] about it he was talking [ __ ] to Blau and me and another comic who was little and then Andrew's there and then blau's friend who's a Big Country Strong [ __ ] were there and he was like no you two are cool but these three I got problem I said [ __ ] the whole time I'm looking the other way but then BL stands up and he's like yo bro you are so [ __ ] ugly dude goto to talk [ __ ] to a guy is you're so I wouldn't even finger you dude we almost fought we used to get in almost fights all the time and that was the first one I was like this boy drunk is wild oh [ __ ] I forgot about that you're so [ __ ] ugly bro like it is you're so that doesn't make him pissed off that's doing soad but he also blow homie you could tell he like loved fight he was like oh yeah I don't want to fight but if we do I'm going to enjoy beating the [ __ ] out Perfect combo cuz you were talking [ __ ] and he defend and I can tell this is like a college Dynamic of this literally you learn to go walk around with the c with a [ __ ] walk around with a GI this dude and M mcor it's my homie I [ __ ] love him so I had I had two I had three your agent funny that's probably where the name yeah got the name um but in college dude I was the same thing I talk hella [ __ ] but I had like three big friends who love to fight there's this one story where we got we all got in a fight and when I say all I mean them um and I was always a dude that waited and then kicked [ __ ] in the head like when I was yeah yeah and I just I'll be that guy and I felt Blitz him 100% And we were we were all getting fight of this bar and we all got [ __ ] uh pepper sprayed from security dude have you guys ever been pepper spray the face had he a cop was a cop dude we were lit we were literally spitting on each other's faces you proba like that though and I came pull my I came real fast and I I remember we were spitting just to get anything out and we were one of my buddies Argo I love him so much he literally he was taking the spit and going like this and he couldn't get he was like B he's so country what the [ __ ] I can't believe you [ __ ] [ __ ] with with his friend spit and then he just takes his head and starts to run it on the cement dog he's making he's drunk as [ __ ] he he's pepper spray drunk with my spit in his face rubbing his face on the [ __ ] literally cutting his face cuz he that hilarious but he's trying to do anything to get it out SC go are just laughing look at these idiots dude a bunch of cockroaches with raid on them dude that's so funny it hurt so bad but that was when the guy was like ready to fight that kid mccor Chris what's it name Matt MC Matt stood up and he was like hey man I don't think we need to do this and then the guys backed off so hard like they they just wanted to pick on people they thought they could beat up and the second there was a guy that could clearly kick the [ __ ] out of them they're like no it's all good but it was so funny to see drunk blow I Love Drunk blow he's one he's my favorite person drunk blow is I feel you and me would have gotone along together really well cuz I got punched in the face by a bouncer cuz I was the same guy I'd be mouthy right one goty bouncer it was Vine days this guy goes hey I talk to you outside I go oh you seen the vide oh you don't you want to be lowkey you want to take a photo respect keep low key keep a low key meanwhile I'm [ __ ] out four Cosmos my eyes are looking like the new Twitter logo I'm just over here pulls me outside Twitter logo is good and then thank you so much and then so he like uh he like PS me outside and goes to CL like slam the door and I grab the door and then he flinches and I go what this dude is like an old s day state like linebacker that's why I went to school like massive dude he goes what I said what he flinches and then he just clocks me right in the eye and I'm just bleeding just and I'm walking home and then it gets real white I call the bar nobody answers and I left probably the longest voicemail in the history you know this the voice I'm walking home like you know [ __ ] I'm a film major I just go full have you seen I don't need a 23 and me that is I'm 100% white after doing that you SE FIA um but that thank God that bar closed because if they were still open I'm sure somehow they could get in their like their source and see if they still have that but the next day I was like like oh I deserve that I deserve that I didn't I know the story but I didn't hear the voicemail part and it was like walk home so I was just y it do you know what you said leading up to the punch in the face like what got him upset so he I grab the door and then I just said what and I think what's no I mean before when he's like yo let's go outside why you got to get I think I was probably like why why why no I'm good I'm good I'm not why did you want to oh you're just too drunk and that's why he just saw me like being so he's trying to get you he's not trying to kick my dick was out and I was peing on the floor but I don't know what I was doing I I don't know I think I in my head I I didn't think I was that drunk that's I was like why why why why are we going outside why we going to outside but he's kind of just like bulldozing me a little bit into a corner and then the door happened and have you been puning the face aash no shockingly not really shockingly not no wow have you of course yeah there you go for what a random Tuesday I used to fight a lot when I was younger why well not a lot 11 fights that's 11 fights that's what I'm saying that's a lot oh I didn't know what just like I grew up in not the best neighborhood just that type of stupid [ __ ] okay yeah damn all right seven and four yeah yeah I was winning 74 that's great yeah no Dad yeah halfway I don't have a dad either good good oh yeah know I had to say Jesus Christ yeah oh yeah that sounded wild no that's why I said it you're about to get a 12 fight out of him right now why am i d circumcised circumcised we boys we boys see I said he was Jewish dog come on now circumcised circumcised yeah of course good oh you guys don't know Bob bombing first of all BL to this day we all don't take bombing while BL really gets affected and then he it's the biggest act out if you watch his show it's so huge act so back when we would all bomb i' bomb the most huge Act is huge laughter so you would get hug laugh I bomb the most it's not even close I was not funny I was so not funny so I'm not acting like but when BL would bomb it would be the funniest thing because it'd be the biggest [ __ ] act outs and there would be no laugh Z and then you would know he's melting down inside and he had this this dragon act out oh no but the couple times it bombed it was the funniest [ __ ] thing oh dud didn't you guys have yeah okay this is okay this is maybe the meanest thing I've done but this is crazy so funny stand up New York comedy club in New York on the upper west side I used to be there a lot they started a Content house called standup labs they came to me and they were like hey do you want to do something I was like sure I'm broke who gives a [ __ ] and they were like prank shows do really well and I was like I'm not that interested in doing like you prank four different people blah blah blah and then they they're kind of like we think it could do well so I'm like you know it could be funny if instead of pranking uh like four people in episode you just prank one guy like four times and just make think his life is falling apart okay and then they're like do you have somebody you'd like to do that to and I was like I happened to I now we didn't get to finish because the first prank was so devastating and someone blew it but thank God that someone blew our cover but thank God cuz the first PR prank was so devastating that if we had carried through but him I might have really killed himself um we carried through if I didn't find out at the end of that set that it was a prank I would have got on the A train and got on you would have waited for that [ __ ] to hit you don't know this the prank was BL wasn't in a standup New York at the time and again getting past that clubs especially back then was a huge deal so I did say you guys need to pass Blau we'll prank him and then you can pass him after but the prank was call him in for an audition and I'm going to tell the audience then we have it on tape I say guys you have it today yeah yeah yeah yeah oh yeah we have it yeah we you we have it we have we we have look at his face I'm I'm I I think I don't I don't know no here's why we never showed it we never showed it I talk to Gabe about this I actually ran this by Gabe and he was like no it's fine we never showed this because blow put his tour dates under and then show every every 30 second show a clip of him crushing no here's the thing we didn't play it before because Blau was it was like dude if People's First exposure to Blau is him not doing well it might subconsciously plant the idea that he's not funny now Blau has so many [ __ ] millions of views that this clip is and it's also dude 12 years ago look at my face I look young but like I'm a baby in that what is going on so I they're putting up a GoPro on stage so I tell the audience and and blow I know for a fact which is what's more [ __ ] up I know for a fact this BL like you can tell when it's a blow audience you can just feel it I'm hosting and I'm like blow would [ __ ] Crush he would level the room and so I have to like I was like I need to like really tell them like make sure they know like three times I was like guys again I told him when he comes up here do not react at all what does the BL audience look like they're just you can tell when they like bigger act outs a little bit when they like little things like that you can just feel they're like uh little they don't need like yeah they like like performative [ __ ] like they want bigger they want bigger performance and I could feel that from them and they weren't like they didn't love the super dark like whatever so I was like but I would level the room so I was like guys I'm going to call him this a good friend of mine but just do not laugh at anything he says don't Boo don't Heckle just stay silent hold dude I feel bad I'm inle I feel bad about this I owe you an apologies I'm sweating just thinking about this this the thing I've ever done and let me say this too when I was waiting the wings and just to hype this up before we see it like you said it before but I was not pass it as Club so for a Booker to call me in this is a big deal also the booker is in the room so I can't even go off script to be like what the [ __ ] is wrong that's also true I can't do crowd work I can't do anything I wanted he wanted to see a set so I'm not going off script and another thing too is I walk in I ask Benji who's the book at the time I go how are they he goes unbelievable and then and what's insane too is what's insan is I poke my head in and akos is murdering so I'm like oh thank God man me back then if I'm murdering back then if I'm murdering he got it yeah yeah yeah so I'm like I'm like oh this is this is great and and I just came from uh uh another cond of Club where I did I murder I was like I was feeling so good I was like oh running light them bring me up [ __ ] ready going in and this is before we started posting Clips online this is like again like 2012 or whatever this is before Schultz changed it all so the only thing a Booker wants to see is five minutes of jokes and coming from the lantern we're used to we can handle cold audiences I go in on you a bit I get out of there but you got five minutes and he needs to see jokes so you can't so I'm aware one thing I will say I did I was like you have to pass him after this for real you can not pass him after this so I was looking out for you a little bit but I'm still a terrible person and I apologize I was a much angrier guy cuz I was poor and unfunny but this is the this is the prank oh I got to see that but he sells tickets now two Wilbur next week blow out sells me he's doing the Wilbur twice he's so [ __ ] funny he's my brother he's so funny look up any Clips before if you want to watch his clip go look up other blow Comedy clips on Blow comedy yeah so you know he's funny hell yeah and then after this we'll decide if we're going to leave it in I am so [ __ ] nervous good you find I've had it dude watch it sometimes when I feel pull they're pulling the [ __ ] up on quick time this is an old ass video bro wow here's a old oh [ __ ] what's up [ __ ] Good Start um everyone's good everyone's feeling good cool [ __ ] I'm feeling good man happy Father's Day and [ __ ] um I I was hanging out with my little nephew today he's super cute he's 7 years old and he watch this Uncle Michael I can't watch this elbow it's the cutest thing ever he was like tickle me there and I was like I'm not that type of Uncle not got in a fight recently and I live in Harlem so that's never [ __ ] good right and I got in a fight look I got in a fight by accident right I was just walking down the street minding my business playing Angry Birds like a [ __ ] gangster like ah ah and some dude like kind of hit my shoulder oh God and he freaked out at me he was like oh [ __ ] you trying to fight oh you trying to fight oh [ __ ] H [ __ ] I'm from Brooklyn [ __ ] I'm from staying up New York [ __ ] nothing B what the [ __ ] happened here y pause it pause it please pause it if we can pause it yo this is so bad I I would have I I wouldn't have been able to keep that much energy so Props to you I would have bailed the funnyest part of that cuz we've all You Comics we've been bombing and you try to bring the audience in more so he's like off from Harlem he's naming and then you can tell he's bombing so he's like let me personalize it I stand up New York [ __ ] what oh my God yo that is everyone's nightmare dude the worst thing I've ever done but it's so funny I just want to I just want to have everyone remember that aash was like shout out to you this is so good wow we couldn't put it out dude I had to sit on this for like 10 years because you got to get to a level and you're there and I mean this you're there so I'm like now he's famous and successful and clearly validated enough that I can put it out and we can just laugh at it but I was like we can't put this out cuz it's just you want to keep watching like relim hey hey more if you I would have snapped off premise alone I think we're good I think we get it man I used to bartend at a club man used to bartend at a club what I realized is is the club is so loud that you guys come to the bar and you feel like you need to like act out the drinks oh [ __ ] and then tell the bartender you want you want two you want two let me get two sex on the [ __ ] not a bad bit this is [ __ ] awesome holy [ __ ] you know how I do this for a [ __ ] living and you guys were hot as [ __ ] when I came what did I do to you guys is everything fine what like is everything everything's fine you guys have 320 comedians before me it's so cring I love it it makes me feel it's so good so good I'm feeling hot and but I'm like oh my God me too the fact he's getting a laugh out of them at all yeah good is truly impressive cuz they've been directed not to laugh and they can't help it but now we got to finish you guys are good man this is this is what it's about man you get good shows you get bad shows lock the doors we going to [ __ ] light this [ __ ] on fire hilarious that's hilarious the audition I keep forgetting that scattered Giggles doing well guys um you guys been some people in the room uh I appreciate you guys being here please come back you guys are really cool thank you my name is Michael BL have a good night you were so professional he handled it so well you didn't even want to save him at the end of the set and be like this is I'm trying to figure out like cuz the plan was to not tell him the plan was to have more no in like a week but there would be more pranks cuz as it's happening I'm watching being like oh this is even in theory it's so funny but as I'm watching it I swear to God I was like oh this is even more painful than I thought it would be this is I don't know if I reached I [ __ ] up yet but I'm thinking did I [ __ ] up I'm like is this like so [ __ ] mean and then the plan is three more after this and I'm kind of like and it's a five minute audition so I'm having I'm trying to figure all this out in five minutes dude that'll make a man move back to Marland that's crazy yeah I got to go up afterward and be like we would have told him Max one week later but I got to go back a week yeah Max for a one we prank show mean heeded himself after I know you think that's really bad I think you handle it like anybody would I wasting I was expecting way worse it really wasn't bad I do I think anybody would do that right now like what what's happening you these are tried and true jokes he went home and jerked off like 50 times oh yeah hey's like what's going on the next day man oh it's so funny though it's so funny this is the best [ __ ] sketch show you did exactly what be the this would be the best tomorrow it's so mean but it's so [ __ ] good dude the the the interesting thing is is I have obviously ever seen this and this is bad but this is actually not as bad as I thought it's not as bad not as bad I thought it was going to be I'm telling you dude I would have for sure lost it on cuz I think you addressed the the awkwardness had you just kept doing five minutes of bids then it would have felt worse but I think you're like what's happening what going like you were still got laughs even though they're trying not to laugh that is impressive it's also crazy that you can just do that to any crap anybody microphone are next to the cell you be hey guys we're doing a prank you could do that to anybody any given time if you want to just [ __ ] with the H hey guys just [ __ ] with him boom yeah anybody but you know what's interesting is like after I I found out I'm gonna be organically bombing I'll be like this a setup a who told y'all okay I was first got I was first on the show was it a ticket say it the told you at the door man yeah dude but the the crazy part is is after I eat they even told me I was on the train home I was still I know I was still being like I'm still internally feeling as though I just bombed in front of a Booker you know what I mean I couldn't even though I wasn't I I knew it wasn't real I still couldn't sh like shed it absolutely [ __ ] and then I jerked off sure too much stressn how mad were you at him after that dude I was so emotional I don't remember ever I don't think I was mad at you and we never did anything like that but we would just [ __ ] with each other like all the time and again we [ __ ] this is fun but also you're broke you're angry what like if you were eating a dessert we just knock it out of your hands like we just bullied each other with little pranks like that you tell me that if you guys recording set in the back and someone's bombing you pop your head up in the cam cback you're bombing right now yeah we used to [ __ ] with each other so again it didn't see it seemed like we're definitely taking it up two notches but it was like we all kind of [ __ ] with each other so I think it was like all right will you [ __ ] with me and then after we talked and I was like I don't think we're going we can't probably can't put that out cuz I'm watching it being like oh this is worse than I thought it would be so I you had to just sit on and dude I had I almost deleted I got a new laptop and I just for whatever reason I forgot I had that and I was like I didn't delete my files and then I what did that file saved as [ __ ] you blow it was going to be called The Mark I think was the name of the show and it was basically like punked but for YouTube and meanor and you had been on Punk so it all worked you being the first guy was actually like so perfect cuz you handle bombs at worse you were on a prank show it's like a thing you're funny for real so it was like dude yeah I didn't know you still had it I didn't either but when we had you on I was like oh do I still have this and I did I thought you were [ __ ] around I didn't think you had it I have it wow that was [ __ ] you got have a drink now we all get a drink man you know we get take a little break go pee go do whatever we got to do come back BL can settle his thoughts we'll get [ __ ] up together wow dude it's just what you I was I was literally reliving it bro I S first reaction is no no we're not playing it we're not I get it oh my God you have to zoom in on my face when I realize you actually have it cuz my face is like like I it's not it's not it's a very honest like oh [ __ ] what's about happen said 12 dude like 10 12 years like it's a long it's before Andrew had Guy Code it's before all of that so for 12 years you've been buying shirts that don't fit you like how do you have an oversized shirt at that yeah I couldn't dress I still can't this is what it is you mean I am who I am no this was good though okay thank you I'm trying to step it up but anyway that is the meanest thing I've ever done that's crazy but it's so funny and luckily I just I just didn't buy a new laptop forever so I just had that one sitting on the old one I just bought a new one haven't deleted the [ __ ] off of that one yet so it was there only reason I have it and I you would have never seen it but I'm so glad you did and you did better than way better than I thought it's way better than I thought it was dude you handled it well I still couldn't put it out because again I didn't want people to be like oh this guy's not funny but now there's so much evidence that you're funny that I feel like we can play this now dude I mean I'm telling you I would have loaded a revolver like like like slowly and you would have zoomed out on the F train you would hear one single shot and and it and then there Nob just in the wind falling say [ __ ] you all gosh man dude that's a crazy good prank it's so good fact 12 later he can still relive it yeah it was really it's a really good one it's really good it's too good to be honest if it wasn't so good people would have seen this years ago but it's so [ __ ] mean that I was like G I can't do this it feels awful but now again Wilber twice so who gives a [ __ ] that's true Wilbur twice could have added a third um could have added a third yeah I'm I'm going to do this I'm going to do this to you in like a in like I don't know when is going and then you just see him standing up just clapping yeah dude I do fear that and again now when I bomb I'm going to be like come on guys where the camer yeah yeah yeah I got it okay that's so let me ask a question that's sort of related to this when you guys are crushing do you guys this is such a weird like don't have a good self-evaluation on myself do you guys ever think sometimes I I'll just put on myself and ask you sometimes when I'm crushing I think that I'm crushing be because my fly's down never had that I swear to God there there's laughter where I'm like and are y'all laughing at me like you know what I mean like I can't possibly be this fun something has to be that that's just a self evaluation of myself I'm just like oh maybe this is like this can't be real What's happen is there like a [ __ ] so hard something else going I don't have that self-doubt thing but what I still wrestle with and used to be real bad I I remember they'd be calling me up at Eastfield which was the only Club I was passed at other inant of New York and uh as they were calling me up packed room Friday Saturday night I'd be like God I hope these people don't realize I'm a complete phony and it's such a hacky comic self-doubt thought even the [ __ ] I'm annoyed at how hacky that thought is but then the second they didn't laugh I would be like oh [ __ ] they're finding out and I would start talking faster and cussing more and overcompensating and I would hear it back when you listen to your sets and I would hate that and I couldn't figure out what it was and then I realized it's oh I think I'm a phony and they're finding out I'm a phony so now I still have to like if a joke doesn't get a laugh grab my brain and be like yo chill calm down take a breath you're going to be fine you're funny even if this show doesn't go well you have thousands that did you're cool so it's still like a selfworth thing that I mean you probably got some void if you're getting up on that [ __ ] stage so you all still I'll grapple with that yeah I think the greatest part about what we're at in our career now is we have like receipts like back in the day when you don't do well you don't have no receipts now you can just be like hey man I've doing com for [ __ ] 15 years people come to see me two plus million on Tik Tok blah blah blah blah blah like we're like we're good but uh but it's still hard it's still hard to like get that yeah in your brain yeah um should we get some drinks yeah let's get some drinks blow I'm going give you a second to settle your nerves I'm good I'm gonna have two more drinks I loved it seeing that it still affected you though that lets me know if I wanted to be an [ __ ] I could I'd be really successful as a [ __ ] you need to you need to turn that was amazing seven cameras it really is I didn't know that c that the idea of that prank show is really good so [ __ ] mean I couldn't do it stop it I feel like somebody could do it to me and ruined my [ __ ] life but four pranks on one person in an episode is such a [ __ ] smart idea as opposed to one four different people one prank were done just one guy watching them grapple with it every single day it's a really good idea such a good idea but in this day and age I mean one night like that there's no episode two they're done yeah they're out yeah it's over damn you but you signed off very professional which was very proud of dude you guys have been some people in a room is really good cuz I'd have been like hey you guys suck my [ __ ] dick I don't really need to be at this club who gives a [ __ ] he signed off like very like that's my uh American autol audition good night I think I think that I would have loved to have seen this if the booker wasn't in the room and I wasn't auditioning who knows what would happen I would have thrown a chair at somebody who knows you know what I mean but like when you're in those conf funds you have to sort of still be like professional like I'm still auditioning for the club there's no Booker there it's the lantern so the Village Lantern I think we talked about this blow Andrew me blow other funny people good friend of ours qu raso we would stand outside get people downstairs into a basement and you had to convince them this dark basement is actually a room with funny comics and the first three or four people would always be like what the [ __ ] it's just us like what's it's New York tourists they're getting uncomfortable we we had to get Comics s we had to get Comics that were on the show to sit down pretend to be audience sometimes pretend so the real audience would feel comfortable to sit in a [ __ ] B not even comfortable a little less uncomfortable at least there's other people here who I think are on the show or think at the show but uh we deal with you just deal with shitty audiences all the time as a product of that so that when he's doing little moments we do have some training in that but the training is also [ __ ] you we'll [ __ ] I don't give a [ __ ] I'll burn this whole place down yeah the whole place I think I said at some point this [ __ ] but I I did it in a likable way yeah yeah but only because there's a bouncer there I mean a Booker there a Booker yeah yeah all let's get a drink I got a peek and I'll get high guys I'm not gonna waste time talking sports with these two because they don't know nothing about it so if you didn't know I had been on an unbelievable cold streak on priz picks we're going to keep it going you know the plan you picked the exact opposite of what I suggest and that's going to make you money also you sign up at price.com and use the promo code Schultz they will match your initial deposit up to $100 so if you invest a hundred you deposit a 100 you get 100 for free it's uh you really can't lose unless you're me and then you find a way to lose every week but that's how you win just pick the opposite of me so here are the picks for next week the Dolphins are playing the Eagles I don't trust the Eagles secondary I got Tyreek Hill getting more than half of a touchdown that means he's going to score at least one touchdown okay also I got Jaylen Herz throwing for less than 264.50 yards I know he's a great Runner I just don't think he's going to pass for that many yards and last Travis etn I think he's gotten a touchdown the last two games I think he keeps that streak going touchdown three straight games for Travis etn and the Jacksonville Jaguars more than half a touchdown for Travis etn thank you guys prize picks now let's get back to the show all right guys we're back we got drinks for everybody again I don't drink but we're all let's all cheers I'm going to get [ __ ] up we'll get [ __ ] up we never done this together we haven't I feel so good about this dude got I got you I got you I got you let's [Music] go that's more than I usually do I'm going to be how how many M it's only five but for me that's a lot I don't do it all five is a I mean yeah if I did five yeah I'm going be cooking feel nice so you normally going to get some nice limp dick tonight but do you think your dick game has improved how has it not yeah that's what I'm saying it's only one it has to go up cuz it's only one but it has to go up yeah but the communication has to be obviously up oh we're great yeah that's what I mean but I'm sure if it was another girl she'd be like okay buddy mean I used to want to do a bit about this where like my wife used to be like more jealous that I would cheat on her and I want to be like baby no I would never cheat on you my dick game is trash like I'm not going to go betray both of us with this you know I mean that's embarrassing both why would we do that why don't you do that she would't like it I think I've done it but then I couldn't think of more meat to it so I just have that line kind of sitting there whatever if I can think of more meat on it we'll do it as a bit it is interesting that every woman you run into there's is just different buttons why can't it just be the same across the board everyone we run I believe you but I don't know that to be a fact it is a fact I mean I believe you but I don't know Al g- spots are all over the goddamn Place some girls like some in Paca what say Tuscaloosa makes it fun yeah figure if it was the same I don't want to play Operation [ __ ] tell me where it is but what's more rewarding Postmates or when you when you make the food yourself Postmates Postmates all right I'm trying to I'm trying to be diabolical be like don't you like making a meal I don't even like making a [ __ ] meal like Jing out myself and go to sleep I hear what you say I hear I you know the more rewarding I hear you I can't find a g spot today can I get can I get a middle ground I would rather do a hellofresh put BR [ __ ] to my thing and I'll make it does that make sense how is that se what is that sexually to you I don't know I'm not quizzing you I want to know I don't know inquiring minds want to know I don't know so it's like all women are different but at least just give me the recipe and how to find it Ika there you go is exactly all it is in my head it's just this is sounds so whatever it's just communication man it's just open be louder it's just open pull up the clip P The Producers catch and Strays is crazy crazy it was M he's keeping in everything bad you said on this episode for sure he's erasing all the notes what did you want me to take out about that oh my God like a pirate ship over there I was like what happening dude Christ catching a stray on a Sunday is insane god dude Sund love you I love you I'm [ __ ] around we got to get you you don't even know his name miles miles you bailing out on that one if he goes down I go down this is our podcast yeah I thought this [ __ ] was cl I'm bombing I really thre what time we at what time we so I think about that line all the time dude stand up New York [ __ ] my favorite thing is when I pull out of a bit and I go what the [ __ ] is wrong with yall this is my favorite moment holy [ __ ] [ __ ] oh man when is when is this Wii going to kick in you think but they always say that but you'll know oh when I'm gone it's pretty clear I'm gone what what happens my eyes get red I'll probably slump down in my chair I'll be just a lot I'll be a lot more who gives a [ __ ] he's been talking about doing weed for probably over a year before that he's like maybe I'll do it like maybe like just edging he's like edging doing I don't know I think pandemic I was like I haven't done anything and I if life is short so like I'll do something I I and then I was hearing more about benefits of like shrooms I mro those shrooms that was are the best great the best I'm trying to get my wife to do it it's so fun so fun they're I'm it's it's my favorite I haven't done all the drugs but it's my favorite drug done for sure better than yeah yeah but if you give me a health benefit I'm in I'm never taking it oh my God is it [ __ ] a Fus plan if I take it I've only been it once it's so good dude he loves Molly he'll migro those moles like Molly water or just straight up Molly like just just like take a little bit of it yeah is on a Thursday or what n if I'm going out out but it's like then you don't have to drink as much you don't have to hang over the next day like if you micro do it's fine if you take too much I wish we had the qu era I just feel like that was a different our qu is micro do we dude I just watched it I watched it and I my wife weirdly she loves the girliest movies but loves Wolf of Wall Street and we're watching it together again and it's so funny and The Improv in that movie we played it on a patreon cuz it's just like incredible improv they remember the scene where they're talking about tossing the midgets at the targets but they're like how do we do this little people man huh Little People n they send Mes in the movie oh all right dude I'm I'm almost one of them what are you even talking about mean I'm borderline [ __ ] I can say this [ __ ] like a half black person saying the what's the cut off am I it's 5et even I think it's 411 is like CRI 411 and below is [ __ ] but that should only be men my mom is 411 and a half she ain't no [ __ ] yeah no it is I think it's it's a it's a different cut off mom Y come on now my mom is hot giant bro it's great wait wait wait wait wait what you SE yeah giant she's he's met my mom she got the bazongas on her he was at my wedding you met my mom all of our moms on this podcast have giant tits yeah mine's got be tits perfect to be in jail perfect bro breastfeeding at 19 being like I'll see you tomorrow I'll breastfeed right now if she let me give me your tit Trevor your Bob yeah seen I think she's gorgeous as my mom no no no that's be respectful weird about hand's perfect handful I wouldn't introduce her to Michael but yeah you know about a handful I've met her I know you have I've damned her got heav you got the No heav heav No Heavies no Heavies nice ass no nice nice ass you're into the asses you think that's big he's a big ass man the thing asses are like his feet yes yeah and Mom Mama's got beautiful [ __ ] feet your mom yeah oh my mom's feet all right what happened at this Lantern place that you guys came from that's where it comes up cuz all three of y'all are some weird feet [ __ ] it is guy I love feet he loves them the most it's probably Andrew just [ __ ] out of this world with it something weird no no the most oh more than all of that oh the most all right so you see a girl's page on IG is the first thing you go to the he stopped at a billboard from the Barbie movie to zoom in on the feet people honking at me people honking at me you got to know we just y out the window post honk honk I don't give a [ __ ] let me get this on my goddamn Instagram story hot feed God it's so literally something the [ __ ] 7% hard if I think about it he told me a story about hooking up with this girl one time he was a fan I don't know if you're comfortable sharing this story well we'll see okay doesn't matter she came over she came over to my place after a show she knew who I was fan gave me a foot job left didn't say a word to each other the whole time yep what yeah she knew what's up oh so yeah you're on a different level cuz you're actually with the feet different level they don't do stuff with feet they just admire crazy dog I like dude I this [ __ ] yo you're crazy you don't [ __ ] feed god dude if just if you so these are the two if you take them you baby oil them up dude and you just [ __ ] just dude and the little toes are moving to dude my last that's the part I'm out on leave the to out dude my last girl would WAP her [ __ ] toes around and then do oh [ __ ] I'll come she was a brown girl too so she had them [ __ ] you know what I mean Talent she could pick up a burrito [ __ ] y that was one I swear to God that was a big thing well my wife has nice feet and Indian girls don't normally so that's one of the reasons I was like I have to ask as a girl out she's a beautiful Indian girl with nice feet and a Goldman Sachs internship we're I'm going to get this again yeah I can't comment but I love how feet and Goldman Sachs with the same playing field son it's the same it was same to that [ __ ] mattered to me I was like that's God's way of telling me this is my wife that's beautiful did you know that it was your wife when you first met her I she honestly was so like she was so hot to me that I was like this girl is going to ruin my life there's no way this is like a good girl it's just impossible and you were in an awesome place right when you first met her weren't you still in the ecosystem of the no I was doing not great but better I was in I on the guy code and all that [ __ ] so to me life was the Grand I was making like 60k or whatever doing shows and I was living at with case Rosso our homie and we would just be out hanging out all the time I had more than enough to live for what I needed I was like a super independent free time I say I went broke in 2018 oh no no I'm I'm not I'm not talking we'll see what happened there um what uh no no I'm saying like weren't you you had like heartbreak right what I'm saying not fin I just had no game dude it's unbelievable I'm not saying I have a lot now but I just didn't know women all my friends were all dudes I had an older brother I didn't understand how different we were mentally and emotionally and I just couldn't [ __ ] understand your mom fit did you there's no that's what I'm saying yeah but my mom loves me unconditionally right I couldn't understand why I wouldn't only one woman I talk to she loves me unconditionally yeah and she got the h so why have a super hot fat tit girlfriend do you like fat tits I'm not into it I'm I'm out yeah too they're too heavy you know what I mean your mom's perfect no they are they're [ __ ] perfect they're just like they're just like this they're just that right there it's got good nipples though so good but I love it how do you know what the nipples look like how do you not yeah he sucked on them dude I know but you didn't suck on your mom's tits [ __ ] cuck I don't remember my seventh grade art teacher's name but you remember the nips yeah it look like green beans what the [ __ ] I'm just [ __ ] oh man we go GRE beans oh yeah yeah but after you have too many kids it it's the nipple come out really yeah just sucked so much just yeah you after a couple kids you need aola surgery really yeah I'll pay for it it's a new BBL yeah fat you're an ass man cuz your mom has a fat ass well okay it's not a not a fat ass but uh that's T what I look for dark hair and an ass slust what kind of hair does know dark hair there you go I used to get so weirded out when people you like talk about oh my mom's so H like bro what and then like more people Define my type I'm like bro that's literally what is that it do they either look like my ex or my mom and I'm like what the f your ex and Mom look similar yeah holy [ __ ] dude I'm telling you I've said it before this the mar episode in my head I don't know what my wife might look like my mom short Indian girl oh they look similar they act super similar like crazy you think it's just cuz what your brain was raised on that's all you know I knew I wanted to marry an Indian girl so that's something I look for but I think objectively a lot of people would say my wife is beautiful I obviously do but like yeah I don't know I just maybe that's why I was so attracted to her part of it so you felt like she was way out of your league and then it just clicked or something yeah I just also I in my experience that type of girl at that level of hot I was like there's no way this is going to be like a girl on my wavelength in terms of morality and whatever and she's like a super religious so I was like oh this lined up in a way I didn't think it would but it was again she was so hot I was like there's no way she's like she also hadn't had sex till she was married just like a bunch of she's super religious she like wants to be in Gara she's sick I'm Hindu but she wants to be praying every Sunday it was like all these things uh sick Temple where we went for my wedding so she every Sunday she tries to go and then I'll go a lot too just as a part of that but like yeah she was it was like oh this lined up in a way I didn't think it would I there's in New York too it's just it's girls out there yeah so I was like every block out there and they're they're out there just lose [ __ ] running around hey hey who's trying to get finger no but one of these days one of these porn stars you'll get him what do you mean you'll find I I I've had I've had fourn occasion with one is this yours one say that's yours no say well B it actually we won't even know who it is we don't know poras to be honest with the one the one that I have fornications with is not like on on she's like uh in you know she up andc coming artist yeah she in her SoundCloud SoundCloud she's at the lantern but she she's only come up yeah yeah but she's uh yeah yeah describe it and then hot suck a dick through a something tell you something are you guys [ __ ] multiple times or just the once uh we did twice oh wow twice that that's a compliment to you she gets [ __ ] professionally yeah so you you got some Pro dick I did you could have made it to the league let me tell you C back cirle back Circle back uncle shooting at the wi like could have done something with that I got a knee brace on got the Ben Gay on um I think my dick game is f is is probably above average I wouldn't say it was like top top top you know what I think I bring to the table passion and I know you guys are going to make fun of me but I think it matters no I'm sure that matters yeah why would just a lot just a lot of I yeah that's why that passionless hooker do so much I'm telling you 100 but it is very crazy like all get hard you're like what crazy on command that prank or the passionless hooker the passionless hooker I've never seen him so mad I've known this guy for maybe six years never seen so I was distra that's the maddest you've ever seen him cuz when I told Gabe that we were going to do this this uh show this video he was like yo Trevor would love that because he you have like real strong opinions on blous temper and you want to like each other just lose our cool I think we're getting better at it but like man there's this days where you see somebody in it and you're like I'm just going to you man yeah I can't impressive about you too is how successful and all that [ __ ] that you are you're still just like the sweetest guy to me you're just like the nicest guy I think I was Raz right but I don't know like he see me crazy man like dumb [ __ ] like one time the Starbucks was taking too long it was too hot and it burnt my tongue and I just threw on the ground of a hotel carpet and I said it's too hot and then Michael was like it's one those days huh and then just shut the [ __ ] up I will I will say though man like as a kid I was more M go ahead I will say though with your your success went from and I'm not [ __ ] on you this is actually a compliment your success no no no no hold let me just say it's gonna sound whatever your success went from zero to a billion in like a in like two months dog like and and I think that um your ability to handle all of that was very uh was very like inspiring honestly cuz I think a lot of people couldn't handle that that type of Rise that fast and so I think those moments that you were having during that rise were just because you were trying to handle and process all this [ __ ] and it wasn't that moment it was the built up correct and it's like dude I was I was there for every moment of that and and to your credit dude I think you handled it very very well because a lot of people wouldn't have dog like it's not like this slow standom success blah blah blah you went from literally people being like Oh I kind of know that guy from Vine to like the biggest internet person in two months dude I remember him it was insane wanting to start stiff stop telling me about it and then he was like I mean this guy's just blowing the [ __ ] up and I hav't heard about you yet but then it we started the thing before before that but it was but it was like right before that so I was with you we started the podcast maybe like two months three months before the I think it might have been the white CLA I was about the way we connected I was about to quit my job and you were doing College gigs and college gigs were paying you like 2 to 3K at the time and at my at that point I was like bro it's like three months right in Santa Monica so like and then I was telling them how I was selling merch through videos and we both connected on that I like you told me how to to call gig I'll tell you how to do video stuff and we just both like connected on that but yeah I also think just like doing like open mics years and years and years like that just like hammered in my head that like you ain't [ __ ] you know so I think kids get like an ego cuz they're just normal normal normal they get a big pop in videos now they're that guy right so so I think just like that watching guys like Kev and watching people like I had like I had a lot of videos pop in the back end slow slow slow so slow and then when it really really hit that's when I was like okay like it like it felt overnight but for me it was been like I've been posting videos for like three to four years so it was like steady steady steady but but you still handle a lot of people don't and I don't know if you said you inspired by this I I was and I this is so I'm going to give Schultz's flowers while he's not here sometimes you know you I never get jealous of him but sometimes you get insecure like man am going to why it's taken me so long or whatever and then I really think I get to watch Andrew do it and I get to see how he handles himself and that to me has been such a lesson and like this guy has never been too too famous to take a picture with anybody he's never been too famous to not give somebody his best version of himself and so you'll hear stories of other celebrities being [ __ ] and might think that's okay but I got this example of this guy that's like no man you do it that's what you do you take the picture you do whatever and so I do feel like it's so cool that I get to learn that from him and I'm curious what y'all have learned from me each other cuz maybe you've learned that from him I don't know yeah I mean that's literally exactly what you said man just like watching how you uh just like took on all the success that fast as professionally professional as you were during all the success was inspiring but also like I did learn a lot where just like even just how to like handle yourself like through an airport or like try to like hand yourself in the meet and greet and like H how you how like the stuff you even sold the meet and greet like all that kind of St as fast as someone can whip out a phone you can be on the internet the next second later I never wanted to be that guy was like having a public meltdown at a [ __ ] you know quiz with the airport like that'll ruin it I'll have a public meltdown yeah if I feel disrespected blow and I do have this in common that's the [ __ ] that takes me Z to 100 if I feel like you don't have common decency I'll catch myself quick I'll like start to ramp up like okay ch ch ch but like I'll feel it come out like you know as a kid bro I like used to my Xbox remotes the controllers had bite marks like my life this [ __ ] folded up bro it folded up like an overcooked Patty this [ __ ] fold I would bite on them I had multiple holes in my wall the KY [ __ ] punching the [ __ ] in the wall That's all me I would throw remotes I would just like I just like I dude I bit my iPhone once and cracked the screen just so mad just bit it what who knows this was like maybe I was like 19 or 20 how did you calm down was it like an active thing I well what happens you get this like post nut out of like stress regret and you're like what am I doing yeah [ __ ] gnawing your dog's looking at like why you chewing on the remote that's my job you know you just feel like an idiot and then I just like I think that I just never wanted to look like an idiot in public and I just think that like it's not I don't know I just I never wanted to be like like Bagel boss remember that dude that was going crazy in New York like I just never want that to be how people associate with you oh that Trevor guy was dope but he's a complete [ __ ] ass complete [ __ ] I just never want to be associated with those two you're always friendly though I've seen you get recognized I've seen you get recognized I see with Andrew all the time and it's like oh and also dude having my wife one time some some [ __ ] from pelaton my wife take those classes and then this girl her whole thing is about being positive whatever and my wife saw her in New York airport and she was like oh that's the girl who's and I was like Yogo say hi she said hi to the girl now granted it's early but my wife then maybe a little uncomfortable she just goes hi which you're kind of and then the girl goes Hi and then my wife kind of and she's like I just want to tell you I love taking your classes you're so nice I love whatever it's so thank you so much and she just goes okay yeah and I was like you're the biggest [ __ ] in the world dude and I never want to be that but it does when you start I realize when it happens a lot that's tiring you got to but you got to do it but it is like I'm glad I had the model of being like it was never okay no matter how she get gets recognized all the time I'm starting to get recognized more but that's and I see constant like hey man what's up super comfortable super and I'm like oh that's the way to be for somebody to go out of there comes on to say something to you or like like wife a build up and then the let down you're like I went out of my way to give you a compliment and you're going to shoot it down like that just you feel worse yeah I always try to put myself in their position where it's like it is a lot because they've been they've been seeing you for three minutes and they finally worked up the courage to come over to you and then you're an [ __ ] it's like dude it takes 3 seconds just like oh man thank you so much man I appreciate you listening I appreciate you watching the Clips you want to get a picture ausome bang it's it's [ __ ] 20 seconds snar responds do anything for anybody it's like people mouth off to a cop you feel cool in the moment but the cop's not cutting you any slack what if they're not hey man I'm such a big fan cuz there's only I've had annoying [ __ ] too where somebody walks up filming in my face I was at a bar last night and [ __ ] this guy walks up filming with a shot he goes yo this is for you and you're just like all right I guess I'm just gonna just you know you kind of just in the back of your head like this is weird but you go all right let's get into I had a guy he didn't outright know who I was but I looked familiar you know you get the where do I know you're from I'm trying to get a uber we're leaving I'm date night whatever it's like 11 it's [ __ ] cold outside windy maybe rainy guy the guy has uh yeah yeah yeah Good Feet absolutely the guy has an umbrella he's like 4 feet away from me and he just pokes me in the shoulder with the umbrella that's crazy and I look at that's crazy popping [ __ ] yeah I look at him and then he goes where do I know you for I go I think I know you where do I know you I think I know you and I just go I don't think you do man and then I just like grabed that's the only time I can ever remember in being like you can't poke someone with the [ __ ] thank you I'm not crazy right pay that man [ __ ] deal as short as he is like he had to bring that like you was sighting him I know you from somewhere yeah come here kid where do I like the disrespect I see you wizard of O [ __ ] got must have must yeah that's crazy CU that was the only time I was like I'm not going to indulge this [ __ ] thing and be like oh I do stand sometimes I'll be like I do stand up cuz I don't know how El handle it clip online but I was just like no [ __ ] you and you can't hit me with an umbrella crazy yeah yeah I wondered for for months I've been like was I a [ __ ] to that guy he was a dick right yes crazy he was Indian so he was also short but I was just like you're [ __ ] [ __ ] you dude I felt it on my shoulder for like minutes after I was like [ __ ] is who the [ __ ] does that how do y feel about guns rather sh me in the shoulder and said where do I know you from is it I'd rather he tap the gun on my temple and be like where do I know you from can I ask you a question no that's crazy so that is insane so I I can't be hyperbolic for a joke I mean what are we doing here I can't be high and hyperbolic [ __ ] hyperbolic uh sorry how do you feel about because I I think I might have my video get uh strapped up is that a bad idea why your videographer I don't know he he's I don't want to hire someone else such you it's unbelievable it's unbelievable how much this guy hates spending money videos shooting G that's crazy yeah why wouldn't you just get the gun I want to shoot anybody or just tell the comic club like you guys got security right they never do just have an 8 fo4 videographer you be good no one not he's not that he's not that small but I also want him to be strapped up is that stupid no dude pay for security what the [ __ ] I don't want to pay for someone else stop it no you guys don't bring the type of energy that you need anyone with a gunar r sometimes I on stage on stage I could definitely now I will the people sometimes will be like how do you not get your ass beat normally I will say during a show like yo guys we're just joking around if something if you feel like cross the line just let me know I'll move on I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings I'm not here to disrespect yeah you've been doing this for 15 years not a single person has got on stage and hit you it's not going to happen three black girls in St Louis almost beat the [ __ ] out of me one time yeah they misunderstood something I said as actually what happened they were accusing me of saying this [ __ ] and I was there it's like penguin with so C was there not doing nothing filming the whole [ __ ] thing getting beaten up doing his job fire clip I said something what would you get more mad get in your ass beat or not get in the clip no not getting the clip with yeah of course beat my ass but let me get 4 million views Jesus Christ but they but they like went nuts and I couldn't even understand they were like going crazy and then I was like they they accused me of saying something I was like I didn't say any what the [ __ ] are you talking about and then I luckily I paid Kev to come out there back then I couldn't even afford it I was losing money but he came out there and he had it on tape and they were going nuts on IG people were leaving hate comments on my [ __ ] um an intermediary emailed me you know he was was like hey man I'm a fan I just want to know what happened this seems crazy I talked to him and then they said the the girls want you to apologize and I was like yeah if I said what I said they can have the apology I'm going to send them a video and if I didn't say it let's just leave it alone or something no they said they don't want to apology on IG live no [ __ ] you but I was like you're waiting for everybody to get an IG just waiting just waiting I'm going do my apology at 2K I was at like 22,000 followers at the time you think you're going to get off of me but I was like no here's what I'll do if said anything they are accusing me of saying online here's a video if I said any of that I'll apologize I didn't and then they just never reached out again they didn't take down any of their comments which was kind of [ __ ] but yeah I almost got killed there and I was like for sure don't [ __ ] around in St Louis also armed security probably a good idea yeah I remember you calling me I was at my dad's place when you called me and that you were on like not even on one you my mom got a Facebook message from some random person in St Louis it was crazy Christ because the video involv or just people at the show people that they knew in St Louis that dude I was getting death threats I was getting like but there were people at the show who told people it's not like this is those girls put it on IG IG they IG live probably nobody watched and then they posted on IG they one of them was this was CRA there was just like I'm going to sue I'm going a lawyer I was a law and I was like you're not you don't know the law if you think this sound like me back in college getting punched in the face I'm a [ __ ] lawyer yeah but it was just like a 24 hours people are like yo your tickets aren't sold out to your next show so it's going to be packed with a lot of people wearing red oh [ __ ] and I was and I remember Bob being like dude just cancel the show and I was like and then Andrew was like nothing's going to happen and I was like had can show Whitney cancel show in oxar which is kind of where I'm from yeah I don't know what she said she made a joke about oxar and like people were up and comments and she canceled the show but I was like I feel like things might have been fine I don't know like man dog but if you if there's even 1% of you that has like a fear like they don't they don't for the most part have metal text or [ __ ] comedy clubs there's 300 people out there like I don't want to be doing you know a [ __ ] joke and then they get it I don't know what's happening dude the girls got kicked out they didn't even leave the building they charged a stage got kicked and I'm remember thinking as we're charging the stage I'm like oh I forgot St Louis is city where you're not supposed to [ __ ] around and this girl could absolutely beat the [ __ ] out of me she was a big girl dude I'm three of them C if I'm lying please I i' ask you speak up these are three legit big people what were they accusing you of saying or is it just too crazy to even it's it's not worth putting out there cuz said wasn't anything close to it I even want to act like it was close I don't know how they even heard it but somehow whatever they got offended I think they were drunk and then they're upstairs yelling and I have to finish my oh also as they're charging I'm like they could beat the [ __ ] out of me but I cannot back off I cannot take I cannot act scared on this stage cuz I would rather die here than let these [ __ ] know how terrified I am so I remember I stepped I Ste back for like a half a second I was like no you got to so I took two steps forward and then I was just talking to them like what are you even [ __ ] what are you saying none of that what what the [ __ ] are you as calmly as I could then they get kicked out and I can still hear them yelling and I have to finish my set I have to do 40 more minutes with them yelling which is obviously all we talked about but it was a crazy experience they're right up there's like upstairs they're not even out of the club they kicked out the club downstairs showroom upstairs bar there's at the bar drinking yelling at everybody about how crazy how [ __ ] racist I am or whatever and I was like I said nothing like what are you talking about but legit death threats in St Louis you see [ __ ] is wearing red I'm out at breakfast my mom sends me a Facebook message she got from someone else I started crying in the middle of the restaurant I was like what the [ __ ] is happening this is my mom dude my mom into this yeah yeah there was this time um Schult said something bad about Philly on a podcast and like Philly got really upset like the the I was even getting DMs like yo [ __ ] that guy like it's on site for him so he was getting like real death threats and then he had a show coming up in Philly like in two weeks and so this was a time like you know I was just out of lawn enforcement I still have my piece or whatever the case is so I'm like I came strapped to the show just in case of [ __ ] and nothing happened he was good yeah it was actually uh son who was like yeah sending uh Andrew death threat yeah yeah God damn dude crazy that's what I'm saying Out of Philly and you were like and then landed landed in New Jersey it is funny you still have to pay for your ticket you know they're like they're like putting in their credit card information go talk [ __ ] you know you're still getting their money it's kind of nobody's paying to go to Comedy Show to attack you guys you're going to be F crazy to pay 60 bucks to shoot somebody yeah you're G to be fine you don't need guns all right well I don't need one yeah he my vide also I fired guns in Vegas and it was fire as [ __ ] gun Vegas too a machine gun in Vegas I was like I get it now yeah guys who all in guns I'm like yeah okay find your father but now I did yeah you're like the the energy your body so F crazy just a fun time dude doing calibers and [ __ ] we sh we shot up our producers car 420 caliber I don't even we blew up a car out there they put they put one of their patreon goals if they got X number of patrons I don't even know how much they would the Gabe their producer had like I guess kind of a beater car and like we're going destroy this thing like your car [ __ ] we're going to blow it up one day it's like a joke and then we're like wait a second there's places that do this we were calling all these but hey we want to blow up a car hey let us do it yeah but it took like maybe like 10 phone calls yeah the first 10 were like what no you want to blow up a car like yeah it's for Tik Tok come on but then we found a place and we got to [ __ ] blow it up Gabe was the one who did it it was awesome the shooting guns dude I feel like if Republicans wanted more people on their side just let everyone fire a gun anti- and be like but have you tried it yeah you don't have to shoot a person but like maybe and then liberals can let conservatives come inside of women and see how fun that is and maybe they'll be everybody shooting yeah just shoot let everybody shoot it what's better coming in a woman or shooting a gun coming yeah it's not close okay maybe shoo a gun you don't have post shoot regret well some people do yeah I mean shooting shoot it C myself if you're out there shooting pumpkins you know man it's targets fine but yeah speaking of pumpkins you guys dress up for Halloween great segue great segue thanks man what's your costume cuz I feel like you want to tell it no I no I haven't no I don't know I just I just wonder if you guys are drink your something probably for this podcast we're going to do something most likely all right you guys don't know what you want to do you guys want to dress up like Power Rangers I never I never put that much thought into it me neither I [ __ ] love Halloween why is that I don't know but I've had a show every single Halloween since my wife and I started dating and I'm so happy about this that's great show you cannot take shows on Halloween weekend this year and I'm always like okay whenever was they some she' be like oh there's a wedding coming like oh I know but the de Mo Funny Bone really needs me yeah they really need you yeah you yeah it's a commitment you got to honor the commitment yeah Valentine's Day [ __ ] I'm in Cincinnati's day I don't think I that's why you're single yeah that makes Halloween dude but in a relationship he's so committed so in it's fascinating I like FaceTime he's like oh I'm at a museum I'm like it's 8 a.m. we're just looking around yeah dude I was rooll BL with my ex one time when we were together beautiful man yeah we come into the podcast what you and be like oh this roller blade I was like who is this man yeah yeah it's fascinating right it's crazy so you don't miss it night and day cuz here's the thing I want to find love but I also like random scattered [ __ ] so how do so how do I combat that would you do an open relationship both ways huh open relationship yeah I love it oh this is what I want to pit you guys but that's a porn star dat a porn star it's an open relationship that is true but it's not but it's not open because can can I you get to [ __ ] other people that's what I'm saying great I'm into it yeah that's an open relationship yeah and remember what I was talking about earlier where I like the videos dude they're unlimited yeah you strike me as a guy who would date a porn star damn I don't know how to take that look at your hair no yeah that's that's not bad at all I I think I think I might be into it you guys are both editing Clips at the same time yeah Perfect Dude Barnes & Noble like I can't show this one how do you feel about these I mean oh this what I'm to pin you so how do you guys feel about I know you're out because you're married you have a lovely lovely wife and I I was engaged so you might have to PCT you're engaged kev's super married miles is single I got nothing let me know what do you think you're engaged yeah congrats congratulations I didn't know that thank you brother how long did you dat before you got engaged uh three and a half years three and a half years that's a long time yeah how do you feel about it I feel great how did you how did you engage her I'm doing crowd work now what's going on how did you propose I'm interested I don't I don't know this uh we went to Mexico and it was like a planned thing I had some friends had my mom there didn't tell any of us [ __ ] guy wow because they would say they say [ __ ] on a podcast before it's supposed to be out there so yeah yeah but then you just don't tell Andrew you tell the rest of us CU only one of us that's thing that's the thing it might slip and then once he hears it and then it's [ __ ] blue so yeah and then I did it on a yacht it was kind of nice on a yacht did you have hoes I had hoes that's so cool who am I going to propose my mom with the heav you know um up and so this is what I wanted to pitch all the all the all the single man or the people that or the people that went weigh in on this do you think that you do you think this type of relationship I guess could work you can be with your wife right but you're allowed to cheat I just got high for sure I just got [ __ ] high good good then this answer be great okay and you're you're with your wife and she's lovely and you love her so much you guys have kids blah blah blah but you're allowed to cheat once a quarter why would every guy not be on board you have to sell the woman on this idea no but the woman is a lowed to cheat as one no oh no all right Absol just look at every basketball player right I don't know if the wom is allowed to cheat I think they do that thing when you say basketball players cheat once a quarter you mean like four times a game exactly yeah yeah but yeah no I think the wives kind of do their thing I've heard that as well yeah so we hear we hear the story damn yes so the about the wives that's troubling I hear the wives that bothers me that bothers me dud I want them to do it they deserve it yeah on the RO Jazz I didn't think about that go [ __ ] your P90X instructor who cares uh no this is I don't like this at all this this two-way street thing is not this should not apply to cheating oneway street so local road but don't you want your Bey happy exactly oh hey are we about to kiss don't I want my wife to be happy yeah absolutely having in a monogamous relationship but if I cheated and Che yeah absolutely all this guy's in clip mode right looking for I don't know why he's antagonizing and I know you're a little high so that's why I'm getting you oh maybe I'm just [ __ ] around but yeah but the but the rules are let me you took a sit out like a Down's person you like hold up can't say that yeah we can on this pod oh you can yeah a couple words will bleep out they're super Hollywood so they got all the PC sh no blad does dude he used to want to act and then he was actively I remember having conversations with him but he was like I I feel like I have to choose and then he shows standup he actively doesn't want to act tells them done tells them I'm done Trevor you're hosting a show on Fox or some [ __ ] that I've done a few things I'm kind of going through right now but at the end of day I like making my own [ __ ] I like getting the idea executed and put out the next day there's nothing better than that like just weigh no weigh in no notes um but yeah I do want to try some of that traditional [ __ ] just to say I did it no networks have come to you about like my special's on Amazon I got to plug that nov November 14th Trevor wall pterodactyl on Prime video uh it's a prime original I'm [ __ ] pumped on it so maybe that'll bring some some opportunities if my career stays the exact same I'm [ __ ] stoked where I'm at in life right now but I don't know I think a lot of cool [ __ ] might I'm talking about sketch show especially that I would love to do that because I have so many ideas that I want to do but it's just like I just I get stressed out be like that's too many people I'd have to cast there too much money I'd have to do it's like let's shoot a sketch with us dude maybe use it as the intro of the Al had that idea I would love to do that that'd be fun as [ __ ] I have so many ideas that are bigger than my mom's com in the lights them yeah handful of tit that's the name my special hand and then the end tag is perfect you did say perfect which is so good no wow crazy anytime I think about it [ __ ] perfect right down the middle Empire how often do you think about your mom's dude I have my mom's yearbook underneath my bed I was keeping it safe then why don't any of the pages open [Laughter] Michael page 31 and 32 stuck together holy [ __ ] but yeah man if [ __ ] happens out that would be awesome you know cuz I I feel like I've done everything I wanted to do on the internet I just want to challenge myself what's your favorite thing though you got to pick one L I just love making sketches with my friends and what I love is like watching from behind the camera and watching my friends do what they do best and I like that was a [ __ ] t would you like so you're a cuck too yeah well their dicks are in their y you're a film film C film you are cck yeah D I never thought about that you guys are a lot hor yeah all directors are a c they are yeah do it again they're so weird well Dam [ __ ] what's his name the Nickelodeon guy bro he loved the feet oh yeah did so he' be like y Dan oh Snider or something like that but there' be there's like compilations of like all the times he would like pull up feet [ __ ] on purpose if run it back oh wow why they got their shoes off inside a mall I don't know no you got to do that in private that in public Trevor you got some dainty hands bro bro people be saying that I got small hands you know Mount of times I've been on dates with girls they go let me see your hands go I am not [ __ ] tonight me too know funny my girl uh Hannah B she told me to men that [ __ ] oh my God hey if that if that's your what they did to each other I appreciate it's not as bad as stand I'd be getting comments I'll be holding the mic but I mean I never look good on stage oh that's a great for shot me on stage and the comments like little dainty hands petite hands call my hands petite like it's a 4 o steak a little petite do we all got small hands but thisis you have normal [ __ ] man hands my [ __ ] little yeah same yeah I never feel good on a date doing this over the over the candle being like yeah but but the last date I was on the girl was like oh my God your hands I told you oh God your hands are so cute and and we did and I [ __ ] sco up sco up I I li about my be said that their mom have handfuls oh wow that's disrespectful disrespectful of your mom that's great that's why I don't like fake tits implants I feel like I'm rock climbing these things are too big out there because I got little hands and you just feel like don't change the subject from the fact that you called your mom little titty that's disrespectful agree never we would never my mom got little fats no I mean you titty big heart though huh little titty big heart though she's a lover oh okay my mom got little a big heart I got a great heart nice be tits oh my God oh my God CRA he's drinking water in both these cups that's not even drunk BL drunk yo BL get I'm high dude come join me I you I'm drunk I'm two hinges is deep C get over here and suck my dick that's a fire podcast you g to say get suck my dick that's literally plug talk yeah know do you think any has ever cancel on plug talk and they just look around the studio like all which one of you PA trying to get this work yes I can't believe that's a real show God that's the best crazy that's what I want can't believe the show that we do is a real show like you guys [ __ ] I know you [ __ ] this F the I hooked up with one or I guess but I didn't I have sex there we go see you didn't have sex you hooked up with guest fin you against some you said what you didn't have sex no what' you do just made out it was just like a casual you were filming podcast when you were 13 years old I was saying I was like what's what what's going on here so now if he just hooked up what do you think this guy what on toes never up not one time man dude he has weird dick discipline I'm telling you when he's in a relationship this I word discipline is very sep it's like they all come over we have a great time we laugh it off it's very like business like all right take care we we'll send the clips to you you do Dropbox or we transfer it's any of them tried to get at you that has to have happen so let me cuz you had some baddies on there yeah so there's one lady on the podcast that should remain nameless that I actually shot my shot recently and we had a whole back and forth and then she just stopped responding oh wow God can you say the name we B it out I think know who it is yeah can you leave it out miles BK this Absolutely I'll CAU you DM dirty like yo don't respond to well that be so don't even thumbs up that [ __ ] oh my God that is going to haunt you for a life oh my God it's so [ __ ] funny um uh yeah just believe it look at no no we have to get like these are these are like [ __ ] lukewarm pictures at best yo hey hey whoever's controlling think just go to her go to her Instagram please cuz this this is crazy pictur like you're not representing the girl that I didn't get right yeah you're not represen that's a good guy dude yeah would you ever be the guy in the videos if you never had to show a face 100% really dude it's so I friend do that somebody recogniz from Brand from me that doesn't even [ __ ] matter from The Voice one of my buddies got recognized like yo is this so and so cuz from The Voice wow yeah which is crazy you recognize weird he did right God damn it God [ __ ] yeah she about look at that oh my God all right that is the biggest compliment when people tat to your face on him that is crazy I mean that's what kind of human being [ __ ] everybody God damn it yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I mean all due respect please let me never mind just my B back was it left on red or just no response who got better Soul Crush kits her or your mom my mom yeah cheeks up they're just more nocturnal not nocturnal nocturnal not the word I to are you looking for dude I don't know you have a lot of uh what's it called Igloo Brothers not ESO Bros oh I found out that I'm esimo Bros with Johnny SS that was pretty cool let's go that's the man right there who is the girl are we not we're not asking my Bros on anything huh that's very that's what you think he no idea I have no idea I don't think so I don't think so either wow I am asking with your friend like one my budes yeah like it's crazy you guys just like it switch circles it's just crazy and but never obviously never on purpose but literally four different and and he's like a he's his like really good friend I know him obviously but like not super well and it's just we we found out the yeah exactly the same type my mom has your mom ever heard you say any of these things no cuz she came to a show and did you do any of theit did not I have six minutes on how I want to [ __ ] my mom a whole bit really whole bit that's a whole coar set right there yeah and she uh that's crazy and creepy and my mom my mom came to a show for the first time she's never seen me to stand up I didn't tell you this she never SE me to stand up one time and she thinks bl's like the sweetest most innocent kid it's so funny I'm not and she came to one of the shows and there's a whole bit that I do that I obviously didn't do but I did it in the but I did it in the special oh my god dude yeah it's G to be very uncomfortable no it's fine it's not no when you do sex all the sex [ __ ] in front of her does she know that you're out here because I always thought she thought you were just like the most innocent kid I mean I did I did the whole set minus that bit in front of her so she knows your she knows yeah yeah yeah she listens to the podcast she knows how much no she's not listen to podcast you know she's rude she's not listen to podast his mom is the sweetest she's the sweetest woman in the world but here's the funny thing man I think all of our parents act like they're super sweet they done Coke off any you know what I mean like I know that you think your mom is sweet but they yeah but they've done so my mom from an Indian family that was so Sheltering that she maybe after marriage they her and my dad party but not that I know of but definitely nothing when she was younger and she lived in at home through college I was made on cocaine you know the story it's crazy and my mom would act like she's never done anything was Thanksgiving it was Thanksgiving at my grandma's house they were both my dad and my mom did a ton of C on Thanksgiving is a wild tripto fan yeah crazy so you're just you were just sober yeah and they [ __ ] they made me and I know that cuz my dad told me but my mom my mom is like oh my God I'm just so no You're Not Innocent you got [ __ ] nice perfect tits and you've done Coke like before I was born and it might be a we make one of our mom's tits with this isra I'm uncomfortable you should be the six bit on I [ __ ] my mom is where I Dre the line but I do want to see your Bob tits yeah I'll show you can you imagine I had a hella nudes for my mom my phone n the bit is better if you don't know oh yeah okay yeah I mean because imagine if you see her and then you don't think they're perfect yeah then it's not funny anymore they got to be envisioning perfect tits I've seen them they are yeah there you go yeah it's the same thing like how they didn't show Jaws for the whole [ __ ] 45 minutes of movie cuz in your head Jaws is way scarier than it actually is you know what I mean smart yeah it is smart yeah that's a real story he was L at a premere in Dallas and with the shark and he was like this is so bad I have to cut around this it's [ __ ] embarrassing so they just made they just showed the fin the whole time really yeah AR what's your favorite position and bro what position you g to let me do this in huh I mean what position are we doing this in it's my wife so I feel weird saying her favorite position you see what I'm saying yeah yeah 100% I a sura like this oh right yeah what's your favorite position Al uh I've gotten lazy over the years so I think I'm like Schultz on my back is kind of nice really I just be like dude on my back I come hella fast no but on my back my girl comes all at the really yeah and I don't have to I don't have to do that's wild you talking about your fiance like that bro no it's not I like it I respect it it's not I mean that's good I make my [ __ ] wife come all the time true yeah that's what's up I don't have to do any work maybe I'm just jealous see what it is is I'm just jealous yeah that's beautiful man did it take you a while to figure out the uh the come sequence or you guys kind of n we had great sexual chemistry IM immedi immediately and it's [ __ ] awesome and so now I just know like when I get tired I was like okay I know how to get you there yeah you're done now I'm done God that's that sequence best dude get her off then you can just come yeah that's the best you don't got to think about baseball nothing you don't got to pinch yourself no it's it's perfect nothing dude oh with the porn star were you super focused on not coming the funny thing is dude I was like a i i last it I didn't have to like do anything weird I don't know why that chemistry there there was you were hanging out like riffing a little bit yeah there was a lot of sexual to Do Porn Bro like it it's just seem he makes too much money not doing porn to do porn yeah it'd be kind of weird for me to do here's the thing if I start only fans I will rack that's what I'm saying like imagine you could just be like the Adam 22 of Comedy doesn't TIG out here with only fan answer raing the funny thing is it kind of does fit my brain where it wouldn't do anything it wouldn't [ __ ] you up in any way if you're not trying to be out in Hollywood on TV and movies and [ __ ] like that this just uh it helps you brand well you're on a called stiff socks it's good let me call my assistant that's a valid point that's a valid point yeah I'm high I'm so I'm the only one high everybody else over he has a glimmer in his eye yeah he does that I look happy I'm high no it's beautiful actually I'm like I see what your wife I see what yourself you have you have a nice like like uh like like a Buddha energy right now it's nice and it's nice and like caram great for me huh wheat is great for me it's like it's a de-stresser I like it do you sleep better with weed like do you smoke to sleep no usually I I will do it sometimes and it doesn't help a ton how would you sleep cuz I know you were sleeping like [ __ ] it's gotten better it's not it's still not good but have sleep study yet as bad no what are you you haven't done a sleep study yet it's that's like a time commitment you know I mean son all his relatives are doctors and he won't do a [ __ ] sleep set he rarded C what are you going to do prescribe me Ambi I don't take that [ __ ] no you don't to do just see what's what's happening but then what do they do with those results yeah what if the results just said jerk off I do that before we go to bed it doesn't help you don't sleep well either I don't sleep well I don't sleep well I never sleep well in hotels it's terrible I realiz that's another reason I slept so poorly last year when I'm traveling I think I'm going to sleep well cuz I can black out the curtains and sleep in as much as I want to and the whole bed is mine but I sleep terribly in hotels all the time sleep not know it yeah can I suggest something the pillow you have at your house do you like it yeah okay so my suggestion which I've been sort of doing is I just bought I doubled the pillow so I just brought the pillow now with me on the road so at least I have something like some comfort from home I've actually thought about this I take two to The Vape Pen jerk my dick I don't think it's the pillow I think it's the weed in the pill right and I'm so homosexual I was like you know I've been thinking about this no he's like I have five flashlights of my favorite por star so I got pick which one I want tonight what I'm saying is what I'm saying is all all the Comforts from home so you have the pillow which I think helps two hits of The vapen Jerk your dick into Oblivion and then and then wipe up and go to sleep I think all of it has been helping me I'm just saying where you put the pillow on the flight you just holding it under your arm I put it in the in the [ __ ] what's it called suitcase a carryon no I if I'm traveling if I'm traveling I usually carry I have like a merch bag that's full of [ __ ] so I can just check it don't you guys wear the same outfit every night you're perform I do uh I don't yeah cuz if I want to let's say I'm working on a bid and I add something to it the next show I'm wearing the same outfit so I can just cut but have you ever posted like a clip clip I've been doing so much crowd work but there was a bit posted on a horizontal video where I was at a comedy club thought of something like after the show and I was like Kev this is where the idea and probably other people have had it but for me I was like oh I'm going to put that in tomorrow and see if anything new comes I'm wearing the same clothes and when we make this a bit add that part to the bit it is when you're writing on stage especially it was like a thing I was writing on stage about the city or something but it was coming out as a bit okay it was all just coming out in bit form you know what I mean I was like oh oh this is a video if I wanted to be next day I thought it something I was like hey I'm adding that put that in I'm not going to do this until I come back to the city so there's no chance to do it for two years only going to get so good there and then I was like why don't just do that all the time s different undershirt Al makes it easy you don't got to think about anything yeah oh yeah you're done you that's my outfit for the weekend y you comfortable bro I'm good I'm good the only thing I'm missing is my own pillow and a [ __ ] Bape pan and jerk it off what's your doing it for what's your goals dude therapeutic over here so we going have to switch sheet too what's your goals man you know what I mean I mean yo Al don't let Al [ __ ] on you for sitting vulnerably you got [ __ ] nail polish on I'm so tired of this people that's how confident I am bro huh that's how confident I am son sty Bender has nail you lose you ever lose one of those in your wipes for godamn I let that n there gel gel stays on oh Joe say okay yeah yeah all right you know I'm not I'm not a cheat respectfully I just interested I'm getting a little drunk no I like it it's F I don't know if sentences are coming out completely at all but no you're talking like me now that's I talking a regular so what are your goals man where y'all at y'all sober me got nice little buzz going my [ __ ] buzz like a [ __ ] that's not enough dude bumblebee what I supposed to do shotgun a four local right now do it run into a you want one we got a four lo you got a four Lo on come onck have a bunch of 18-year-old interns in this place guys in Lo and see what the [ __ ] happens dud let's do it would you actually take it s on a loo are you kidding me down are you yo we got to do a [ __ ] P pull some [ __ ] under the is going to be the best patreon ever all right guys we're going to take a break real quick because you need to know about keeps look this is not something I have to worry about too often because I have no testosterone I can't build muscle I look like an idiot but you guys real men two out of three of you are going to experience some form of hair loss by the time you're 35 more than 50 million men in the us alone suffer from male pattern baldness but if you have that that issue you know who you need to talk to you need to talk to keeps they have more five star reviews than any of their competitors it's simple it's affordable it's stressfree you get personalized treatment plans provided to you by a licensed medical provider not some Quack and they're delivered straight to your door so you even got to go to a doctor's office and get all embarrassed with your hairline you just stay at home order online talk to a phys online product comes straight to your door and it's easy to subscribe they subscribe so anytime you're run on L they just send you more they have to think about it it's just done one and done very simple so if you're ready to take action and prevent hair loss go to ke ps.com flagrant to receive your first month of treatment for free again that's ke ps.com flagrant to get your first month free ks.com flagrant free now let's get back to the show all right guys we're going to take a break real quick because you need a better for you adult beverage look if you're going to drink don't drink some can of beer filled with a bunch of [ __ ] ingredients that you've never heard of can't even pronounce or some cheap ass vodka that's going to give you a Crazy Hangover you need June shine they have tons of easy to drink to go adult beverage options they got Margaritas vodka sodas rum cocktails made with premium ingredients and this is important no added sugar those traditional canned cocktails can have 20 plus grams of sugar that's a lot dude that's damnn near a can of Coke June shine no added sugar it's perfect for taking to the beach Fourth of July barbecue whatever the day is you just take it out there you go to a ball game you want tailgate a little bit right there June shine they have flavors like passion fruit vodka soda my Tha rum stuff that probably tastes great and best of all Jun Chan does not leave you with that I just drank a lot of sugar feeling and it gives you a light bright buzz it can be found in over 10,000 stores across the country I'm talking Whole Foods Target Ralph's Vons uh Albertson's Kroger's Wegman's Total Wine BevMo Safeway and many more 10,000 and we worked out a special offer for our listeners this is actually a great offer uh at any store you buy one junshan package and you get the second one for only a penny that's 122 to $20 in value go with the $20 if you're Indian that's how you do it I recommend buying one of their vest their bestselling variety packs you can see which one you like the best great ready to try all the flavors all you got to do is go to Jun chan.com flagrant text them a photo of your receipt and they will venmo you immediately everybody likes getting a venmo payment they Veno you right away it's that easy go to ju n n.com flagrant that's all you got to do get yourself two cases ju n i ne.com flagrant now let us resume the programing I'm hot guys what in the [ __ ] you take five or 10 five five Hit or Miss are either like very cool for me or I'm like oh hold up feels like the AC is on in my brain yeah dude these people who do like 200 is nuts I don't want to get there either that's why I try not to do I've done it I did it last week and this week and even that for me is like do you find any creativeness out of it or you just like the feeling I don't get creativity you know what I love that feeling when and we can we can roll if we want are we rolling um you can whatever you need to do well R uh but that feeling where you feel like you're detached from your body a little bit okay I love I feel like so not stressed I love that feeling I love just riffing with the homies when we all smoke or Al an edible that's like my favorite you feel like everybody's on the same wavelength oh see I don't love thank you thank you I did comedy High one time on 420 in Denver I'm probably going back again but the crowd was high yeah no they were sober I was high and I did a set and I didn't love it cuz you're like you're a little slower when you're thinking about bits I would stumble over words here and there nothing crazy I made one glaring [ __ ] understand you're almost sound like autopilot like your brain is so locked and you know what you're doing but like with weed you're like wait dude that's what was killing me is I would be like Focus you got this brain would just drift and then I'd be like cuz I hate when I'm not present in the room right that's that [ __ ] God I'm man I can't I'll turn your mic on so this is alcohol and caffeine right alcohol and caffeine and then you just fight a Walmart greeter pretty cool um but people do Red Bull vodka sorry why is that crazier uh they took the caffeine out the OG ones were like some insane amount of Caffe recipe the OG ones I mean you could start a [ __ ] hem with those boys those things are crazy the OG ones 5 Hour Energy yeah in that yeah yeah yeah [ __ ] dude my buddy makes just like ratchet ones he pours a 5 hour in these yeah and it's just like wait he pours a 5 hour in one cuz he wants to make the og4 Loco oh my God yeah he's looking to get arrested but yeah I mean they're like four bucks so you could go when I had a fake ID had a Florida fake ID all my homies and I got one and we' just buy these be like 3.99 and then one of these with the OG with the caffeine that's all you need you got a 5 hour under Johnny all right it's took it bro you pour that in here I was going to say we pour that in there y get [ __ ] get me to the capital we doing [ __ ] tonight where's Nancy P's desk at what I [ __ ] on it Can I taste it oh I see you you never have one I have oh my god dude I used to have one of these and [ __ ] a weird woman that used to light her entire apartment in uh just red I used to call the devil [ __ ] devil [ __ ] that's what dude I I don't even remember her name son Chase mod with this huh no pour that in there you want get in there I was getting in there dude but yeah High shows there used to be a show in La at a dispensary oh I've heard about this and uh when I would smoke I wouldn't do it a lot but I in the crowd was high I kind of liked it if everybody was high cuz I feel like you could spitball a crazy premise yeah and they'd be like oh I get that yeah and and it felt like very workshopy but like fun okay like you could just spit out half a premise yeah I don't feel that creativity thing I don't think maybe because I typically do Inda I think this is is a hybrid was more like AC was more like you're up but I I think I've taken that once or twice and I still wasn't I didn't feel like super was kind of weird cuz you're just laying in bed trying to go to sleep but you're [ __ ] on one before I what did the show I did 5 milligrams sativa and then on stage Midway through my set I was like let's just take another two and a half because it's the 420 show let me do I brought y'all here say I'm gu let me get it [ __ ] let's go and then at the end of my show this we do like a little panel where the other Comics come up and we do a question and answer then I was free as [ __ ] I think I was more funny fun cuz they get to do most of the talking and then I just chime in every once in a while with like a crazy sentence and now we're having fun but carrying having conversations this right now all my focus I'm focusing like it's my special yeah I was in Chicago and somebody handed me a joint within like maybe five minutes at the vi on stage go smoke this smoke this everybody's chanting there's like a thousand people smoke it smoke it I am losing my mind five minutes in I go the rest of the set is [ __ ] but like the last five minutes before it's last bit I'll do it and I I probably took like three hits or whatever and and I was like oh this we're in yeah and I was like I got to finish this [ __ ] pitous hit it yeah I like lit the back end at first I was so nervous smoking on smoking on papers but I got through the bit but by the time I got back to my parents read the show funny enough I'm talking to my parents afterwards I'm like a little high and I'm like uh you you the show whatever did you see the show but man I just like I don't smoke a lot but when I do I'll get affected by just a little bit so I was like I do not want to smoke this yeah but that clip it great I have never wrote one idea that was remotely good when I Sor ever I can't that that part you know people like smoking like oh so creative zero no but sober you're kind of on 10 already correct I think yeah I think that's what it is but yeah when I'm high there's nothing I can't nothing I don't know how to like harness funny when I'm high I I don't either do you get that write some stuff down high definitely especially when I'm ripping with with like just like the homie or something watching like Animal Planet or some [ __ ] but yo [ __ ] you ever think about that you know just like random [ __ ] like that but then I look at it the next day and be like I don't know if that's a full baked out premise there yeah you know it never makes any sense no no what's your favorite animal for some reason koala just came into my head they're just so happy they're so chill but they got HP I'm going to Australia next week October 25th TRC cdy bris all the other tickets are could be better Hey Hey listen we we'll sell it out we'll get that.com could be better I like the hesty like when people go new tickets added no they ain't they've been there low tickets no they're not yo yo I love seeing the strategy people use to sell tickets it's great I won't Point them all out cuz y'all might use them but the [ __ ] is so funny than Comics too like people post like links the half people clicking our Comics like how many tickets he sold how many tickets he sold in Texas I don't think I do that no I'll see if they've sold out sometimes and I'm even if it's people I like yeah I didn't know I was thinking you could like count the tickets and I was like I don't know about that but sometimes I will will show you how many CES are left oh see I don't know that but I uh yeah the people that I'm like I'm I love them most of them but I'm competitive with them I know they're competitive and that's a big Mark okay that's where I want to get me all the time probably like this guy's doing that I have no problem with us being competitive is great we should all be competitive when we're like doing shitty things that's when it bothers me you're doing that you know what I mean when you're like best friend of years I'm a good impr what a great story thing to do a great story and I never put it out if I was a piece of [ __ ] 5 million views sitting on not oh my God that would have been his biggest yeah that would have been the biggest clip ever true that would be my biggest clip today why I think you it once this episod comes out but preface it up front be like I [ __ ] crush and then play that I also why is that video so embarrassing when you have a YouTube video called how to kiss you know what I mean I would rather have 19 how to kisses which is a true fact than put that out you have 19 oh dude there's probably 20 of them and they all did num you know why your boy can kiss I'm I'm not familiar you have a video how to kiss had a kiss there's probably [ __ ] I'm not joking there's probably 20 videos and they've all done over it's not like his channel like a like a company like hired him to do it back who hired you to do this what was the casting process uh they were like sounds very me to make out with this papaya sex ad type shirt they didn't even ask me anything they would called me and they're like hey do you want to do this I said yes like there was no who's your agent but this was early it was early I didn't have an agent this is before I even met him me film this video I think yeah I think yeah can we can we pull that up why the [ __ ] we putting out man how do you get on list oh yo you you took that dog hey I [ __ ] [ __ ] that was kind of hey watch this oh [ __ ] son you look more like James Franco even then right here that's the look at that [ __ ] tricep dude yo camera work killing it they hit the zoom hell yeah she's W she's in dude she's all wet I'm way and then you turn away from it yeah I can't give her all to it but one of them has like 50 mil how many M how many million views have 6 so many have so many the top right one got like 34 mil sorry wish you could tour dates at the end of that that' be so Co too God damn it wait okay I'm so [ __ ] confused this happened so long ago some company Howcast hit me up and they were like you can be uh the comedic relief of these kissing videos in my head I was like oh cool I just like they'll they'll do the demonstration I'll riff whatever and then when I got to the [ __ ] Studio it was that and I was already there I was like and I was young in the game I didn't I didn't have the skill set to be like yeah this is not going to work for me didn't have anybody to run it past you know like manager agent like oh it's a day where I get to make out with somebody correct it's a great gig so when I got yeah so when I got there I tried to like say some funny [ __ ] here or there but I mean it was literally just me doing that for the entire [ __ ] time so it's just multiple takes of you make out with a girl and then you try to give them on liner and then that didn't work like everything they cut everything huh they you kiss the same girl yeah well I mean you want them to cut you don't want to give the bad kisses no I'm saying cut like I would say something I would try to like Implement some type of funny and they were just like okay cool and then in the edit there was no [ __ ] funny it was all just me being like yeah so sometimes when your locker room you got to just kiss a girl blah blah blah and you just kiss and whatever it was [ __ ] horrible I literally had to I had a lawyer reach out to them to take my name off of it because when you search my name 19 of his videos would come up and not my website dude dude I it hor you got to run some targeted ads again yeah horny 16-year-olds in your shows being like you me to kiss not now dude in the still still to this day in the meet and greet people come up like so I was your first fan and not of stand up I was like what from the Howcast like yes from the Howcast and they would just walk away cool yeah they don't want to get kissed These Girls huh they don't want to get kissed I mean dude when women hit on me in the mean greet it's so weird to me I don't know what the [ __ ] to do what do you do I don't know I'm like though thank you ha handshake on Le if you're telling me good looking you're a dude I try not to you're tell try not to it's great what you ask I ask maybe [ __ ] fans he's like I try not to that is so good see now you being I'm still wait I'm your real answer he at least he said he hooked up with one port so I'm still waiting for your real answer about your guest on the pot it's fine never I know you haven't memorized at this point I'm never it's fine it's good it's good it's fine you shot his shot that one and then it didn't it didn't work out yeah he's [ __ ] but who shot their shot at you from from a guest on the show yeah no one dude I'm telling you man like I I would be the listen I told I'm a cuck I told my [ __ ] my mom you guys don't think I'd say I did this you haven't seen the genitals of anybody in your podcast cuz I know that for a fact it's zero genitals besides Tres zero that absolutely that's a lie wow calling you out of your [ __ ] you don't think you've seen Bobby Lee's dick oh yeah we seen Bob's dick I have not he whipped it out I've seen Bob Le's dick I haven't we I avoided it the whole episode I did with him and then he sent it to me on text which is actually kind of funny when you think about it's hilarious yeah but at the time I was like I nobody want to see this but I I know you've seen Bobby Lee's dick he makes sure you see it sir I have not then maybe Bobby don't like you that's something out in front of us did he whipped out was crazy for Bobby it was yeah all right but Bobby knows that he's he's packing no he's not he's a great guy I I haven't I haven't you were sitting next to me all right no Bobby Lee wait what happened after that you had to channel that out he's like this a traumatic experience so Bobby Lee is for sure but like for I'm talking about like for like female guests never I've never hooked up with a female guest actually let me take this step back there was there was one Paton where all let you go for there was a patreon episode that it was essentially like let me because you know sometimes in the during the podcast I talk a big game so essentially we're like sometimes hold up so we brought a lady on that I had fornications with to essentially it was also like pandemic times where like like he was constantly hooking up with this girl like pretty steady and then like jokingly we like mentioned that and I think she reached out I was like I would do it yeah and then she came on and she backed you for a lot of it and then she was like oh sh there she told me that I I she would uh love if I went down on her more oh yeah was hilarious yeah and I like a good go down but sometimes I don't do you like a good go down with my wife yes I do all right I keep I don't like this can y'all be more single [ __ ] stupid [ __ ] back in the day back in the day it's like nah if I didn't if there was no romantic connection I would never yeah I don't know if you've been playing tennis yeah who who knows what you've been doing you know you know you can taste it that's true but I will but I will say recently in the last maybe year I've been going down really I'm going do and I'm going down under Australia October 2 but on one night stand or yeah that's a little W that's a little crazy to just me you trying to get some bumps on your lips you're one moito deep and like what else yeah I have yeah yeah yeah I have licky lick hey come over here he Tred to build a reputation out in the city he like let him know you're building back from what she said I see okay right it's like nobody works out legs more than somebody goes yo you Skip Leg Day that guy hitting legs in the gym the next day 100% that girl being like you don't eat it what's upbody his New York ho anybody know I've heard they're flocking everywhere Flip Flip every street corner every street corner is so slept on New York women are way hotter than La women I completely agree dud I'm fixing for the city I might move it I think I think thank you oh man let me slap those Dy ass hands youpp it's all good it's all good good it's all good it's all good let's keep the [ __ ] going something about New York chicks what I get wh all right said you finish that something about New York chicks walk that walk and you're like you could spit on me and I'd be like about time yeah girls I think are hotter than La I think if you're into white women maybe LA's more even though they got hot Latinas out there but they got them here too yeah but New York I mean La they try too hard they are like trying to be seen they're trying to like they're walking out in the most skimpiest [ __ ] models are trying hard as [ __ ] I love La they kind of just look fly we've all traveled this country and New York is the best we probably walk what like seven blocks to get here in each block Michael AR Yoo it's insane but City I was I was impressed by and I I guess I'd always heard it when I was in college cincin never I actually never nice one in Cincinnati I never performed in I got a hot cousin from Cincinnati though dude what the fck good good sa oh yeah n his cousin is kind of like he would turn you and you're a ready turn but he he would go 360 you go back normal right back you met my my wedding he was one of my groomsman with you so yeah yeah he's hoty toi yeah but that's take those fancy fingernails and throw it in there he might get one he can get one he deserved it he can get one he can one Austin oh Austin's great really hot girls and I noticed they're often with really unattractive guys I'm out it's too hot there he's been with one woman in his life he don't get it Austin Austin don't got it atin no when was the last time you were there I'm there like they don't got it like that dude I we did a show what was it March no June last year and I would see beautiful girls would just like troll men and I was like this I would have been King here this is my kind of City this is my kind of land a lot of that like the Midwest too yeah you know who got ho Madison what's someone please back me up here Madison Madison Wisconsin got ho I mean all college underneath the Parkers and all this coats and [ __ ] like that yeah there's some bad I don't know I've never seen college town like an arbor Madison and Big 12 schools big 10 schools school not San Jose State that muches though so you like fives what the [ __ ] did Al say I didn't hear him he said he said you like fives miles we have a conversion scale on Miles you just reduce the number in half so a miles 10 is a five that's so shitty that's but but like what's an example can you pull like who's your your I never call a girl miles how about you tell us a miles 10 also I never call a girl a miles 10 that's Mark's term so let's be honest and when you're like are we saying like a famous person no like just semi so they can understand like a photo we could see or something uh [ __ ] I don't actually know say rosean like n like the chick from uh Harry Potter that's like a for you right yeah her her mind Geto she so high no but that's not a 10 but that's a 10 for oh that's not a 10 but she's bad as [ __ ] but that's a 10 for him that's what I'm saying so that's why he has a different skin but everybody said she's and you're just like no that's this a better example out there no is she a 10 no is she a 10 I love all women yeah she's hot than I think she's gorgeous she she's G but she's not a 10 yeah but I'm like a six so who am I to be that's not a 10 that's true a man that's not true [ __ ] you first of all you're not a six man I hate when you talk but that's what you rich dude that sh yeah I can't say the last word but yeah yeah no they do that it's like I'm pretty so I got to like say I'm where do you think you're at bro 6 seven probably if you had no success four four Jesus Christ I'm just I'm asking no like how broke am I you make $30,000 a year you work at [ __ ] GameStop then nobody's a 10 actually some dudes are 10 but most dudes are not if you're not [ __ ] gorgeous that's also true huh that's no that's true M trying to get our attention again oh yeah was for okay I get it yeah but if you're not a 10 as a dude who's broke you're a four there are say I hear you but there if you're gorgeous it don't matter how much money you make you could [ __ ] for a home yeah corre but you're not prison prison Bay got a [ __ ] billionaire just because yeah he was that if you're that level it don't M but if you're just like a good-look guy and you're broke it don't [ __ ] matter you're not good-looking to these girls that's true if you're gorgeous it don't matter at all your it is interesting because it's it's very age appropriate right so if you're like High but you don't have an anent if if you have an ancient job but you're hot if you're like 22 it doesn't matter it doesn't matter it doesn't matter but once you like 30 if you if you're hot and you have ancient job it that that hotness starts to wear thin very fast yeah same for a woman uh huh same for a woman what what does that mean what do you mean if a woman is broke you don't find her hot that's the gayest thing you've ever said on this podcast and you have pain in Nails right now I mean yeah no I'm staying on that yeah like if you're 30 and you're hot but you have [ __ ] going for you you're less attractive than a 22y old who's hot and doesn't have [ __ ] going you know what I was so offboard but I'm back on board there you go yeah that makes sense glad I stood on that one feel I didn't feel conf about specifically money I was like no that's crazy n if you only got [ __ ] going for yourself and you're 30 but you're still hot and it's like yeah you're just some dumb useless [ __ ] if you're 22 you got [ __ ] going for I expect you not to have [ __ ] going for you trying to figure out 30 with nothing going on what are you doing yeah no you got three cats yo if a woman gets a cat and she's single I start looking at her like this going bad for you huh D that's me that's me I'm a single man with the cat it's you're a man that's just gay that's just super [ __ ] gay I mean you see the cor you see what it is they're in the Hollywood ecosystem like you got wildly homosexual to be a single man with a cat okay if it makes it any better I had a girlfriend we got the cat together broke up then I got join I got the C did the cat she took everything else you started with joint and then all of a sudden now it's just yours no he he mine he mine so you wanted that that's crazy it was a present to me that's crazy but here's your Christmas gift mine now [ __ ] that's also true the girl should get the cat so that was like a keep it yeah it was a we're on great terms now but it was a messy breakup at the time she's like I'll take the $5,000 couch you can have the cat I like what about you damn down bad that couch was five grand five grand couches be expensive couch be expensive couches be expensive if me we just got one that [ __ ] on Facebook Marketplace yeah dude got please don't do that it's like this guy sold out the Wilbur twice and he's still so [ __ ] stingy he text me the other day he goes these two girls want to come to my show do I comp them I was like yeah why he goes That's Money to taken away from me I was like what do you mean that is true I believe that I can't dude I can't get away from his mindset dude no I can't get away from it I've talked cultural what the [ __ ] is it genetic how you know you like a real answer the real answer is I had Zer doll four years ago there's a lot of people who had zero there a lot of people who had zero dollars who aren't as cheap well they're stupid they're dumb people and they're they're going to have $ Z six years me I'm like I had $ Z in four years now I have money I'm going to I I'm going to keep money it's good I'm going to keep this I don't want to I don't want to [ __ ] ball out and get a guy damn Gucci blah blah blah blah blah blah blah nobody's asking you to do that okay nobody's asking you to do that all right to comp girls who want to go show that you're interested no that's like 60 bucks I don't even dude I can respect the idea but you hold on to money so tight it's crazy he'll be like I haven't slept in four days I'm just editing this thing and I'll be like why don't you just Outsource that and you like God I don't know man it's like 80 bucks [ __ ] like that and I'll be like what do you what the [ __ ] is wrong listen you guys are right somehow find the only videographer who's also he any that doesn't exist I want it's not no all right it exist he's not packing like that he's just big but I can get him a gun license he get one big country [ __ ] you get a gun license Kev would I yeah I would oh man how much how much is he paying yall double it he he can I tell you something also no he won't I will not hey I'll lower it but I'll give you a gun yeah yeah um listen I just I there is a lot of fear in not having money again and I think that my mindset is still stuck four years ago have you talked on publicly about like how broke you were everything yeah oh yeah yes I have yes lift yes talking walking dogs this guy after Punk 28 20 what is it year I moved to LA party 2019 like 2018 something like that before that I think your lift rating that's a great question this guy drove lift but like he he said it to me one time he didn't even tell me years that's where I know him you [ __ ] but that's the kind of sh so he didn't even tell me this until recently I knew him and I think we might have been going broke together but like for him it was probably even more of a mind [ __ ] you were un punked you had this pop and then it's gone which I had too but anyway he was like uh I was driving lift around La like paralyzed with fear that a [ __ ] comic would get into one my lifts and be like holy [ __ ] blow oh wow and then you just got to deal with that and it's like you got this TV credit blah blah blah so that's a [ __ ] another reason I didn't know if you were saying that publicly but early on was like I'm so proud of how far you've come that's the [ __ ] I I don't remember that part but I remember that part of his life but I feel like I feel in La it's not as big of a deal cuz like most of the actors there are like waiters and waitresses yeah I think kind of I feel like it's in that world in my head it was a I hear your point I think in my head it was a little different because it was like the punk thing was such a major like it was like a nationwide search for the comics are going to be on the ship no we didn't know you were on there bro yeah no no doubt no doubt love you love no doubt man no doubt you wer no doubt no doubt no doubt anyway my but my point is is like so to to get that and then to have that ride and then go down to zero I think think there was a lot of like and it might have not existed but in my head there was like this Optics towards me or whatever and again it might have been surrounding cuz you're used to being on set they're like your talent get whatever you want here's food and somebody gets in like can we turn the AC down a little bit yeah how's with the Kardashian weeks ago it was s it was such a it was such a mind [ __ ] so uh and again it might have just I might have just been making it up but in my head it was like I [ __ ] woke up at like 6:00 in the morning to drive people cuz in my head I was like oh comics aren't up this late or I'm sorry up this early so I'll drive from 6:00 in the morning to like 4 or like probably 3:00 or 4:00 p.m. and then do like open mices and I was like deep in the game at this point and so the whole point of me even saying any of this is like that's where my mindset was and so to actually have money now it's like I don't ever want to go back there so that's why I think I'm anate cheap obviously but I think it it accentuates it because of that no that makes perfect sense you are an cheap but I get how that's more of a mind [ __ ] but also at a c point you got to let go a bit now maybe I let go too much I don't know probably we still thinking call cheat crazy cuz you're pretty cheat too I will spend no he's crazy to me is he not crazy to you this dude spends money like crazy that's cuz he's they they Andrew likes watches and then all of a sudden he likes watches actually I liked watches first but was broke I but I didn't know you could I also didn't know you could collect them my cousin is obsessed with watches but not even on like what's going to appreciate and value he like loves the movement of it he I was I went to yeah dude yeah he I went to AP he and it's like hard to get access to in AP at all and uh shouts to my guy Aloo that hooked it up but my cousin is like he's trying to get such a watch guy yeah I always H him I always shout him out when I can my cousin is such a watch guy he's like impressing the AP guy about his brightling he's like oh it has a navit timer this is how you work it if you're in the air blah blah blah guys fascinated so impressed and he says to my cousin you ever think about becoming a part of the AP family which is like you don't get asked and then my cousin goes ID probably just get a used vintage one that's what I like if I had the choice like he couldn't care less about the appreciation and getting a he likes the movement and the look of the Vintage and that's what he likes and that rubbed off on me a bit but then when I found out you can like this this thing appreciates in value I was like [ __ ] yeah let's do that absolutely so that's where I was like oh watches are great that's they look fly you can you get the right one you can appreciate and value yeah but I will also spend on a lot of things I'll cheap out on certain things but I think we all do living in a nice that's so interesting that you feel like he's cheap cuz I feel like he spends money like insane so maybe I just like the what he I love value my dad I'm obsessed with whatever I pay I want to get the best [ __ ] for it I don't mind paying but it's got to be the best I'm like a weirdly obsessive about that I just remember us having a combo here about who tips the worst him and Andrew are used to be bad tippers I think now they're forced to be good tippers cuz they're too like big in the Limelight where are you at percent I'm I'm I'm much more generous now actually what's his name the Hassan ABI I don't know I was talking to him I was like yeah I could tip I wasn't I got better as I stopped being broke I used to really be bad when I was broke I I mean I tip the worst when standing up you know any place where I got to be when you were on the Pod you said you were going to stop tipping died did flr like four years ago just me and and opened on it I can't but now it's annoying if people know who you are you like you want to not of course right you're like [ __ ] you know me if I'm out a lesli's pool supply and you hit me with this [ __ ] I'm like what the [ __ ] am I temping for a pool noodle yeah the SP if I'm at a restaurant CRA sit down sit down always go 20 and above but I'm standing up you know yeah just it's I'm just trying to get out of that screen the percentage kills me so I'm like bro you're making my coffee which I really appreciate let me give you a dollar but you hit me with the percentage of 20% and also coffee is now $8 so you give me with a 20% of $8 I'm tiing you a $160 to make me a and first like $20 an hour first of all first of all can I say this crazy crazy I agree the Tipping is out of control but here's where this is you're selling out theaters this how cheap he is watch this just playback what he said this is how cheap he is if you want a dollar that's fine I'll give you a dollar to make my coffee but if you want a160 for a coffee this is divorce that came out of his mouth oh bro the tell him the only fan story oh okay I I will I will I just want to say this real quick and I go only fans I would rather tip the espresso machine because that [ __ ] did the work yeah he grind the beans he did the thing you just sat there with a cup like this you didn't do [ __ ] if you're making a cappuccino with a blah blah blah and putting a goddamn leaf on there all right cool I get that it's principal you see the robots that deliver food do you guys have that out here is that just an LA thing these little robots just on four wheels La yeah but this girl posted on a story yesterday she's like yelling at Uber support being like why' I [ __ ] tip a robot dog like it was person dropping on my food I want somebody to get it who's the money going to valid point but she's like cussing out and then another robot is the text it's a hilarious screenshot to be looking at but it's so funny cuz you're like who does the tip go to you tip before you get the food and then all of a sudden Wally comes pulling up smoking a menthol be like here's your Shake Shack who gets the money I think those robots are cute as [ __ ] and they are cute put they put eyes on it they put eyes on it so people don't uh victimize it or like hit it or like spray paint it and now humaniz that car [ __ ] I think like ravan or some [ __ ] like that it looks just like the robot I was like tell me your only fan story this is hilarious oh so this only fan I only signed up for one only fans this girl was super super duper bad and I I really need to see her naked please Madam pleas one only fans you sign up all right keep going no I'll be I'll always keep it 100 anyways so I signed up for it and I was very excited he did say he's going to be gay in a matter of time so I believe that he's yeah I mean guys I always try to be honest I'll tell you guys my mom got perfect your mom's nipples right thank you you're right you're right you're right so I signed up for this only fans and I was looking at some pictures and I wanted to see a video and she was trying to charge me a dollar to see a video but that's how only fans work oh I already spent money oh you paid you paid the monthly to get in no that would bother me thank you but $1 no $1 I I will say pulling pulling out a credit card for a dollar is crazy I got paid out of comic Club maybe a year ago and they gave me a check for 20 bucks I go what are we doing yeah we I've had that too got to pull out the [ __ ] for one cent a residual check [ __ ] you I don't understand why you send cost more I had a three cent for sure and I think I had a one cent once but three cents I've had multiple times that's crazy so are we okay with what I just did or is everyone is everyone I'm okay if I had Apple pay I'd do it immediately but pulling out the card and the CV and all that princip don't charge me and then charge me an extra dollar this is exactly what the [ __ ] sop and then you want some head here it's like I'm not I'm not on board because you shouldn't pay for porn anyway so if you're gonna pay pay one more dollar no you have play fans before he's big it's like you have access to everything yeah but there's a but there's a difference though because this is this is like true authentic amateur [ __ ] bro that s alone that s alone that was like the most sincere You' been all night god dude oh my God I feel so sorry laughing in your face you laugh you can laugh at me you can you can laugh my passion you can hear the guy breathing into the phone right here because all this other shitzy all this other [ __ ] has no passion there's no emotion behind it but this is like [ __ ] I care yeah because she she's got a ring light and she lives in [ __ ] tacul and she's shooting whatever she deserves it but if you're going to charge me she deserves it but your coffee maker the coffee machine would Express machine is so funny let me tip the espresso machine I'm telling you it does make sense you know what I started doing is this is maybe classist of me but I will tip like I don't I love not tipping the Barista I do it sometimes because I feel like G I'm going to look like an [ __ ] but I would love to just not tip and then if you deliver like Amazon fresh or whatever I'll tip like crazy I start at 20 bucks cuz I've seen those guys and those guys I'm like G like older people sometimes like yo this is [ __ ] all the groceries yeah yeah so I'll tip them I think over tip them I think and then like if you're like a barista making a [ __ ] latte like like I'm not a dollar I'm also big on the personality if you give me no if you're just like Dead face just like what can oh then I I press no tip turn it back around I show you I make them do it I turn around and say press no tip New York the standard is a dollar yeah that's what I'm saying yes standard is a dollar us to be like that for cocktails a dollar for drink I'll do it but begrudgingly no I feel like sometimes you don't do it sometimes I don't do it or too cuz you did something to make me think actually now sometimes I'm just like what the [ __ ] am I doing this for [ __ ] am I doing this for they getting paid [ __ ] just give them a doll they're going to pay $20 or whatever you might have won me over whatever bro I used to LIF Drive I used to be excited as [ __ ] to walk with a $100 a goddamn lift drive and I'm driving [ __ ] stinky [ __ ] to the goddamn Lac how much would you have appreciated if somebody gave you a dollar extra I dude I I agree and and you're not doing [ __ ] but press the same [ __ ] pedal that you press and turn the same give to the carra oh really the car goes to the J oh really that's all he doing oh really I'm getting you safe to LAX I'm avoiding [ __ ] there's oh there's traffic let me toes in rear Mir yeah I'm turning around hello how is your day I don't give a [ __ ] how you God so you're keeping yourself alive that's what you're doing no I'm keeping them alive no you're keeping yourself alive so that's what you do let me tell you back in the day do you know how much I resisted going like this over a ravine my life sucks he flipped it back that's a good that a good point like yo tip me so I don't kill myself right now but you end they should tip before you get in the car that's a [ __ ] great point I don't know what you did so far I got to tip you a dollar you haven't even started making this so the driver but yo I'm s you five bucks then you drive a little nice put a little ja presumptuous but you know you're going to get you know you're going to get it you know you know if it's going to be good I don't know if you're going to do a good job dude sometimes they [ __ ] my coffee my [ __ ] is super regular and and still they [ __ ] it up actually you guys have a point because if you're at a restaurant you're tipping the waiter or waitress service it's called about the food tastes yeah I'm showing gratitude for this thing you have done for me gratuiti that's what it's called and they didn't do anything for doing it before you've done anything why I don't right so you're just tipping for them carrying the cup from there correct yeah you were a doll it's not even like a tip anymore it's just baked into the price it feels like you just know it's going to be an extra whatever I swear I'd be more inclined to tip if they did it once they brought me the thing and then brought the car I swear I'm not saying whatever but I'd be more inclined to be like yeah dollar that was great thank you you know how restrooms at the airport have like the smiley faces like how is our bad principal who the [ __ ] are you bro I I don't know what you've done for me it's just baked into the system guys just be system man some of Y some of y'all don't belong in the system and they haven't figured it out so [ __ ] you bro I'm going tell you you don't belong spin it back I feel like we're going to see a viral video Vost this like two months you do [ __ ] to me I'm also saying that to a black person is crazy but it's I apologize I didn't mean it in a in a racist systemic racism sense I'm sorry I have to go through that it's all you a't believe that no it's their fault it's all I don't mean white people I mean the Jews yeah Jews what's whatever man you're a walking Express machine I don't give a [ __ ] I give you 58 cents I'm joking I give I give a dollar every single time even if you talk all these are thoughts in my head but I still like correct correct I I tip 20% literally every single time begrudgingly to your point but I do restaurants at this point I feel like if you gave me like not great I got to go 20 I got to start correct 20 is like 20im I have to start at 2530 now I feel like I'll take more if they do the math from me you know it's like 20% 25 3 they they got the you give me service and I I I do feel better tipping I don't know whatever episode we did with h Hassan Abby for whatever reason I was like yeah I yeah I want to oh actually was a little before that pandemic when I went to the couple times we got to go to a restaurant people were working yeah I was like man [ __ ] yeah you got to tip the [ __ ] out of these people and then it just pic tipping better also I had more money huh was it a say post me during the pandemic like I tipped a guy and he left a note on it he wrote like a handwritten note and he goes thank you for tipping extra uh you know this is the only job I have right now with the family and I got three kids bro I ran out of the house to try and find a man to give him more money I was like balling you could just done it on your app that's why I know you're lying this is I'm sory for [ __ ] dud I was no I did do this I did do this y h Minaj never happened it was in my hometown it never happened no this did happen I was oh my God I'll pull up the receipts on Instagram it happen so good dude holy [ __ ] I just mad I didn't make a video out of it that's how you that's what you got to do to be blow up as an Indian right do that more of those story dude don't make jokes about hust Minaj is crazy his daughter is actually in Gaza right now and I think we should really be that's super [ __ ] up deal dude super [ __ ] up and his and his I'm be hon what's going on no no and his and his wife just did a beheading video so you better be [ __ ] be careful I'm telling you bro you better be careful oh yeah we should have got him a drink earlier H drunk so good you he took it down Trevor's like oh my God yeah that's what you should be holding the this is a right to say whatever the [ __ ] you want that's true I I listen sir I am drinking for logo look we did he spilled half of my but yeah sorry man sorry hey give him some more dude no we good we're good I'm good man Al blacked out during the Shane Gillis episode it was so funny stop please don't do that oh you do it but don't do it yeah he just completely fell apart and then he was SE his head afterward cuz he knew he fell apart Al thinks he also can beat up anyone white this is another fun Al thing now he aded Jake Paul could beat him up yeah like ke give me some give problem Kev would give you Kev would [ __ ] you up kill you beat the do I've seen how strong this [ __ ] is this is Lenny bro this and Men this he Ain taking these spear fingers though what's up [ __ ] he's not quick and Limbo with it so it's like I just got to move he gets a hold of you as a r oh yeah fight why not why not I'm two gin in let me see you fight then he's not going to have a videographer anymore you know oh [ __ ] all right Al was talking all that [ __ ] what if what if big Kev was black he might take he might he might take he might take me he might you get that mic if you want Kevin whatever you want bro you know it's all up stop no that's his way you said please don't beat the [ __ ] out of me oh absolutely yeah you know I'm seven and four cuz I pick my battle Pi four of them I didn't pick right I'm having a great time I am having a great time just [ __ ] around you guys patre after this oh my [ __ ] [ __ ] my goddamn ass where's my mom with imp perfect tits you got to sell it as like a ringtone or something that was too good dude you know what sucked sometimes like I knew this is going to sound like a flex but it's not I was really good friends with all the cheerleaders at my school and so so many times like all right we're going on the boat man and they all look at me like bring the cheerleaders and I'm like do you know how much [ __ ] pressure it is to try get all of them are you [ __ ] crazyy guy but when you come through the two matters the 30 pack guy got to carry on the shoulder and the hose Guy this is such a f but those but when it does play I mean you're good for like seven months but one out a 10 times it does well yeah well long if you're bragging about it then it's like annoying but oh you but if if people are relying on you it's the rely thing and dude like I had a fake ID in uh my freshman year of college was the most annoying [ __ ] in the world everybody people never talk to KN hey are you going to liquor store tonight [ __ ] idiot it's like a loser yeah but if you got a fake idea when you're early on you get that dick suck for a goddamn Bud Light not me or cut it off you guys get the joke oh there it is I just saw y'all do your podcast for about two and a half minutes that was crazy and what do you think that was just so natural y just broken into it that was very cool dude we if you guys didn't even know we were back in you guys stop talking Trev I just [ __ ] we going Paton it's going to be on the set they like started the patreon what we don't do a lot of guests so when we do have guests we like forget and then we'll like riff riffi like oh yeah so uh you ever like finger a stranger it's great man we have such good chemistry together oh man that was great dude just early on too yeah I remember you telling me this is the guy you're going to start a podcast with yeah you got good skin thank you what do you do what are you going to wear it you [ __ ] weirdo not comtable complimenting another man you could tell by like how he tried to make that Macho you can it's actually like one of the gayer compliments you can give a man so if props to you but he like had to be like you got good skin but he just said smooth I use kills whatever whatever the product is they got that [ __ ] in New York airport they ain't got money like that in New York huh no facials no SK peels uh no I want to no nothing I got a facial before the special that did nothing for my goddamn face you haven't got Botox uh-uh BR but I'm 30 like I look like I'm 22 oh you're only 30 I'm 30 yeah son of a bit so out there for [ __ ] to look a certain way I saw bunch of my college friends recently and they were all the same age me I start I was like oh bro y'all look 30 Haine doing a damn Boomerang up there so I'm so thankful for what I don't even think I take that great care of myself I'll be eating funion and [ __ ] dude fun are so same thing as me yo lack of testosterone small hands not all bad ow yeah I I don't know I just I just wash my face a lot and yeah I think that's it I don't know but no no other [ __ ] extra what do you do man your skin [ __ ] thanks man I had to balance it out there's the New York right there he trying to counteract G bro yeah your skin ain't [ __ ] anyways you want to kiss me bro you can't I'm sorry you he got he got you that's okay man I I respect it because you know usually it's not good no no we do not age well at all which I am thankful that I look like this age like a goddamn plantain Kev how big is your I don't know about that he got out of that good you're not there a no way sh there's no [ __ ] way I had it removed what no yeah I'm transition I love it good for you come on Kev I wish that was funnier I really do that's your own boss right there that was an HR meeting live in action was I was I'm trying to get you know let's get him on the Pod we all want to know cuz you're 8 feet so like I ask him all the time you don't tell me this guy Kevin is like a gatorade bottle oh has to be big if he never wants to tell like but is it a proportional thing they might not be packing because you're tall but like your dick on me would be like a super soer like what do you think be honest with me now it's just 10 dudes talking about dicks we at that part of the episode hold up he it's it's huge we know this we don't need him your wife limp all right six foot your wife is six foot dog your kids are going to be wild jealous I know wild jealous have qu of what they're going to produce 611 6ot wow 611 plus a 6 foot lady your kids are going to come out crazy I feel like you never have to wait for drinks at a bar they be like you bombing all right cool anyways uh I always have to wait for a drinks I'm a little bit [ __ ] no said no no no I'm be honest with you it was an observation that was an observation not a bit hey we've been talking four hours course bu me out of mine thank you oh I'm texting miles after this like cut cut the bar [ __ ] cut the bar [ __ ] are we getting ho after this yes I wasn't I'm gonna be honest I'm going be honest in my head I was like listen my voice is kind of [ __ ] I don't want to I'm going to just work and then I have one drink and I'm like my phone about to be crazy yeah Bumble Rya DMS ah dude I played my friends Bumble a couple times it's so fun played Bumble married for so long man I know it's a video game it's so cute video G to me it's like I had a I had to joke about this it's like playing Fruit Ninja with Destiny yeah [ __ ] you know I mean where's it going where's my life going how do you meet the majority of the women actually both of you cuz you're both [ __ ] DM is just started I'm not on Rya cuz I'm not [ __ ] I don't know why but but like hinge and [ __ ] I don't really like it why you not on R I don't know I think it's a person you don't want to get married that's bro I'm [ __ ] man I think it's a personal I'm trying to get wiped up he is he wants love I want love I want love too to be I want to come back from a weekend in Omaha and she's like how was it you're like oh it's the best thing ever heard so get on like match.com or some place where people that's oh that's true if you're in the DM like you know those are just fans that just want to [ __ ] you that's true that's a very great yeah what the [ __ ] well yeah there's a Rya for me has been great just in ter like trying to like actually going on Dat with actual women and trying to like find some [ __ ] yeah but uh but yeah DMS are to your point just like fans interactions but it's yeah for me it's just like it's just DMS and and Rya so y not trying to settle down you got a lot of DMS you mainly send and then occasionally get my dream my DMs are just the most dry hilarious this [ __ ] all the time and I'm like oh he is getting at him because he's trying to like get everybody people trying to be funny we can look right now he's like Bae Bae my DMs are so dry you know after shows like weekends DM's kind of crazy but it also just depends because sometimes you have a good show and there's nothing and some sometimes certain cities you'll be like Oh I'm in Chicago it's going to be crazy and then it's don't give me a [ __ ] cuz I'll find fine so it's it's girls that'll be like mentioned you in your story but it's there's been like there's been like two or three random crazy people but huh that's flirting the mention is a big it's a comedy clip that's flirting FLIR you know do you understand you think every time a girl posts a comedy clip she wants to [ __ ] the person she's posting yes yes and you just heard it from everybody here like he did he just finded this I get mad dude what's that about they're trying to beat yeah that too yeah that's where the theory falls apart no either they're just fans or some of them are gay but when a woman goes that extra effort to tag you in it it's a tag that's the part that is if you just share it then it's funny what is the tag so funny you guys have such low opinions of women dude it's just disgusting Jesus Christ man that's a disgusting how view women I like how you flip this these are objects of high value take off high value these are objects I there you go she that's sir thank you [ __ ] serious you talking to Ho you don't talk to robots like that man they're gonna take over the world I do believe that yo I looked at my phone earlier I've asked you guys all the things I want to ask you about got you to talk about lift got you to talk about Punk got you to talk about this wonderful prank that I did on you yeah that was cruel but very funny is there anything else you guys want to say or we we ready to get this show on the road man I think that's that's it for me want to plug the special November 14th Amazon Prime video pterodactyl Trevor Wallace and just thanks for having us man pterodactyl spelled with a p for those and you know eling ter November 14th Amazon Prime wonderful and uh socials you probably know his socials already but across everything Michael blin's on tour like crazy I'm Australia next week you have just shot a special as well you and I shot our special this cool I feel like our careers are on very similar trajectories ups and downs and it's crazy that we both filmed a special with on the same month yeah yeah so you just filmed your special do you have a title anything like that uh I do not have a title and I do not have a date but it will all that information will be released very shortly YouTube is blow comedy everything's blow comedy come see your boy on tour random lady's hair on her socks pretty cool this guy [ __ ] this guy [ __ ] you got the dog socks with the dogs the he the [ __ ] on the socks at the I will say man than you so much for having usful okay this been so fun thank you wow so [ __ ] thank you for having us man I was on here years ago it's great to see you guys again man love you guys love you man thank you so much of course dude of course we out flagrant 2 yo also check out the patreon flagrant 2.com patreon then it's our patreon we're going to record right now what I say what I say said flagrant 2.com pat.com flagrant or flagrant 2 check out patreon.com stiff Soxs I almost did it again almost say stiff sock.com patreon so on Pat am high I I held it together better drops every Wednesday patreon [ __ ] Friday is guys go check it out peace love you bye

Channel: FLAGRANT

Views: 457,540

Keywords: andrew schulz, andrew schultz, comedy, comedian, stand up, flagrant 2, sports, entertainment, pop culture, commentary, comedy club, near me, jokes, interviews, akaash singh, alexxmedia, alexx media, alex media, eddin, eddin media, Thankyoueddin

Id: X0qVu8KgKZE

Length: 190min 16sec (11416 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 17 2023