Adoption Stories | A Flawless Films Production | John & Michelle

adoption was legalized in 1952 since when over 40,000 adoptions have taken place affecting nearly every family in Ireland these are some of their stories John was adopted by Joe and Bridey Kiley of kilrush County Clare in 1971 people talk about her parents and they say they're the best in the world I think categorically say they are the best in the world they are everything to me you know they've shaped me in so many ways when I think about us and that's what know what they are I'm looking at either love it to ancestor she's big part of my life adoption was never secret to me any information they had they laid before me these are my first set of baby shoes mom and dad never true aren t like that were ours just saved everything from our from our childhood which is nice we had four year old and I was pregnant at the time and four year old died of cystic fibrosis so we did said we wouldn't have anymore the baby died as well and we said we wouldn't have any more children ourselves in case it carried and we lost the two of them in five months yeah friends of ours had adopted two little boys so they encouraged us to to adopt on our way up we said off to have twins we'll take you know just for and Joe said that's the sister and she said there were the toolbar in about four hours before she said there's 12 people in already for them and we were 13 we came home we got everything ready for twins you know we talked to me we did all the stuff to it asked us to had twin Latino think things written on the above so they came down to investigators then I suppose she couldn't but say here you can have the twins John was the first one to come in this is a nurse came in and she said how'd you like your new mom please her and I said why said is his name Peter and she said oh I should have told you that the adoption agency told Joe and Bridey about the twins mother so they'd have more of an idea about where the children came from we were told she was very young we heard afterwards that she was a medical student and that the father was probably a medical student John didn't have the easiest of times when he was growing up he had an impediment and a teasing a lot and he'd be much bigger than the others you know it always causes bullying you know he did feel different I've been to lovely children we never had any problems with a little bit of the personalities and he's very loving mistake Asia he writes Christmas cards or birthday cards there and it's like a book what he says in them you know they're absolutely gorgeous I am a volunteer under like for ku here for the last 17 years it's my way of giving something small back to the community as a whole it has given a lot to me a lot of confidence met a lot of friends it's just like one big happy family we've always told me that ever needed to find their natural meadow full cooperation John said that the only time he'd bother is his tooth out my consumer feet busy so one thing that I was wanted was my birth cert and it's really all that I wanted it would be bringing a bit of closure to one part of my life at least I'd know like what's my name this is what substitutes for a birth cert it's called a certified copy of entry in their adopted children's register to all intensive purposes anyone looking at this would think this is this gentleman son problem is it's not John's original name was Peter but when he was adopted his parents renamed him John Howard I have only ever been issued in the register of live births once and these are not the details under the adoption Act John has no automatic legal right to his original birth certificate or information about his natural mother my neighbor he has a birth search the person next door is a person search what is so different about me why can I not get it Jean Kiley and Susie motika met 10 years ago when she visited kill rush on holidays from Germany they've been together ever since Suze has been a tower of support for me yeah she's published seeing me go from not really caring about it to a situation where I actually care a hell of a lot of others I'm thankful that I've had so many strong people in my life she been one I think Susie's been mistress yes and and I feel there's a doctor children need to know their roots I feel that there's something missing in them he needs to know his birth sir no that would that would be no for John I'd say two years ago John had a serious accident at work it made him rethink his life and sparked his interest in looking for his birth mother what of that near-death experience I finally decided himself well if I get my birth cert I think I probably will go further I'd like to go further because I'm getting old my mom is getting old if my father was still alive if there's medical issues that I should know about while John and his twin sister Michelle are very close this is a journey John has decided to take on his own Michelle would be right I'll do all the legwork and she'll reap the benefits I have no problem that I attended today I'm doing a board for her and for myself it's little journey he needs to take yeah yep John had gone back to his original adoption agency to get his birth information but discovered it could take years to get it through them he decided he have to do it another way if I can do anything myself I will lose I can't wait for year two years trees the general Register Office in Dublin holds all the birth marriage and death records for the country and is open to the public even though John doesn't have an automatic right to his original birth certain Durrett option law there's nothing to stop him searching for this document in the public records most adopted people don't know the name that were born with but because John knows his birth name is Peter he's looking for a set of male/female twins born on August the 20th 1971 where the boy was called Peter I might have to go to a sixty seventy thousand names I don't know Bush would do one bit of information that I have I'm hoping that I will hit the jackpot kind of born in Dublin and 20 of August and it's a boy and a girl and male name is Peter the certificates John received contains the information he's been looking for for so long the name of the woman he believes to be his and Michelle's birth mother this is this would be a nice way of putting it I'm not particularly good at demotion ting but yeah I'm I'm very pleased and very happy for years just searching for this information and not being able to get it just even a simple thing like my first search and now actually having all this paper in front of me it's it's beyond comprehension for me a few weeks later John and Susie returned to Dublin to see if they could get one step closer to a meeting with his mother if she's receptive it might be the perfect reveal Ian hopefully had to do us I never smile on my face a lot of people married in 1976 because John knew his birth mother's name he searched through the marriage records and also the death records for the past 15 years oh that's a kind of surprised after all his searching John discovered his mother had died in 2001 you John Kylie has just discovered his birth mother died in 2001 got my first bit of heart when you hear us 11 years after it happened it's still as bad as the day it happened after hearing Gino's iPhone on my dad there she took it as bad as I did or still her upset sister was obsessed why didn't if she was cry so this has been a tower of support for me it's nice someone last night someone that understood I'd like to find mom's grave pay my respects thank you for bringing him well although John met with his adoption agency to look for his birth information he wasn't told his mother was dead however he did get non-identifying information from them about both his parents mum was a normal girl she was 27 my dad from the information I got was 25 years old single Irish and Roman Catholic said to be in good health from the Dublin arian worked in the building construction industry mom died from both liver cancer and breast cancer could it affect me could it affect my sister could fake my nephew John searched through cemetery records and found a grave in the name of the woman he believes to be his mother children if just uncles aunts cousins before I knew that my mom had passed away I actually asked question if my mom had passed away would I be immediately entitled to my information and I was taught no there's a lot of stuff there with mom upon it and dad is taking me back of it there's one two three items there mom a special man when he reached the grave he realized he and Michelle may not have been their mother's only children am I who I think I am and do I actually have brothers and sisters if I'm supposed to be great how dare gonna take that affect that they have a brother and a sister that I didn't know about I can't can't even think what they're gonna take John went back to the general register office in Dublin and while he didn't find any more information about his birth father he did discover the names of three men who may be his brothers one of whom is still living in the family home a very substantive do I go and visit the house you have no idea how people will react to this would they have no one would have been informed prior to this by their mom I don't know John felt he had gone as far as he could with his research and the next step he nervously decided to take was to make contact with the family yeah the mom of the church in some respects they might have would be easier if they were told by a letter Bush I don't know I just feel it's something I have to do myself like I've consulted with family about this most are in agreement this is the shaft sharp shock does create palpitations suppose what can you do it's it's a it's nerve wracking actually it's just one of those situations you cannot predict what's gonna happen I can't say this event today is gonna bring closure to us this how are you doing my name is John Kylie I'm gonna search for my relatives and you may be a very close relative of mine after calling to his mother's family home John has just met one of the men he believes to be his brother I'm gonna leave him absorb it not for a few days and when they're ready they will get back to me because my part is done I can't I can't go banging on their doors anymore it's now up to them they have to be ready after making contact with his brothers John was delighted to be welcomed into the family he and his twin sister Michelle traveled from their home in kilrush to meet one of their brothers and to visit their mother's grave together it was the best possible reception I could have expected we're still very different people with different families different backgrounds different parts of the country it's like a new marriage like you use have to build under I'm shocking with me today because of the date that was every time Mother's Day and now knowing that our original mom lies here in the cemetery that he was important for a support to be here very emotional that I was there wish a blood relative that wasn't my sister say when I started this search it's the last thing I expected was having to come to symmetry sad day in society it was my goal to get my birth certificate to get that document into my hands and then it asked a lot more questions than it did give me answers my conclusion has come hard and fast for me to find in four and a half months an entire family it's amazing it's it's beyond my expectations there's still unfinished business yeah my brothers are half-brothers so that my dad is still out there so the search continues in the months since John made contact with his birth family he hasn't got any closer to finding his father however he's been in regular contact with his brothers in Dublin and they've visited John's family here in kilrush thank God everyone has been great about the whole thing and it's worked out wonderfully with the support of sister mom dad Suzie and like I couldn't do it without them because they brought part and parcel of this whole thing and they give their consent what are today I've seen a great change in Michelle and and John I think John is still a bit sad about his mom and you know there are times he's kind of wave you know a wave with odd I think probably when we found a collector died I thought maybe there must be someone else out there so when Johnson found out we had three brothers I actually got really excited and thought right okay we have to we have to see what happens here now we're just hoping everything would go well and Richard hits pretty I know he's but his mum wasn't nice to happen you know but his brother Tony and Mike and their lovely Tony know he's like our son as well you know soon he's come down a few times we're in close contact I met his wife his daughter and his son and stayed only up with them last weekend and they're coming down as mum said in a few weeks time because it's Dillon's confirmation so yeah close contact and we're just gonna keep and see each other now on a regular basis although Johan and Michelle have been fully accepted by the family only the adoption Authority or adoption agency can fully confirmed that John found the correct information to identify their birth mother I wrote to the adoption board for hopefully that they will confirm the identity of my mom I've wrote to the adoption society with now ten weeks ago since I wrote it's and I've heard back nothing I'm 100% positive I wouldn't have knocked on their door if I wasn't I'm very regimented like that I'd because I realized a actual consequences of being wrong I had to be 100% positive before I was gonna go out on that roof I thought I'd be just stuck with him didn't I yes very happy yeah if you've been affected by any of the issues raised in this program please see our support page at tv3 - IE ford slash help lines you

Channel: Virgin Media Television

Views: 290,382

Keywords: Adoption, irish adoption, tv3, Ireland tv3, irish tv shows, Ireland and adoption, new shows tv3, Ireland tv shows, adopting a baby, twin adoption, twin adoption tv shows

Id: T0lMNLA0qZc

Length: 22min 26sec (1346 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 11 2013