(gentle bright music) (bell dings) - [Narrator] Hey Psych2goers,
welcome back to another video. Have you ever heard of
the term gaslighting or have you been gaslighted by someone? Simply put, gaslighting is a simple and often overlooked kind
of psychological abuse. It's a form of emotional
manipulation meant to deceive you and make you doubt your own sanity and perception of reality. And because of its insidious
nature, unfortunately, gaslighting can be difficult
to spot, especially up close. But you can better protect
yourself against gaslighting by learning how it works and becoming familiar with
how gaslighters operate. With that said, here
are seven common phrases gaslighters often use
to manipulate others. Number one, "I have no idea
what you're talking about." Have you ever confronted
someone about something and they say, "What, what
are you talking about?" You're speechless, taken aback. You start to explain yourself, but they deny knowing
anything so unrelentingly that you feel like you
should just shake your head and brush it off instead. "Oh, sorry, I must've
just gotten confused," you'll say with a hesitant smile. And just like that they've
planted the seed of self-doubt that will make it easier and easier for them to gaslight
you each time they do, all by simply denying what they've done and acting so sure of themselves that they've convinced you too. Number two, 'You're overreacting," or "You're being too
sensitive or emotional." Has anyone ever told you that
maybe you're just overreacting and not thinking clearly when
you were upset with them, or that you need to lighten
up or stop being so sensitive when you called them out for something they said or did to hurt you. Don't let those people get to you. Invalidating someone's
feelings by treating them as if they're in the wrong
is a manipulation tactic gaslighters often use
to pin the blame on you instead of themselves. Number three, "You're imagining things," or "That's not what happened at all." What makes gaslighting so dangerous and psychologically damaging is the fact that it can make us doubt our
own memories and experiences, sometimes to the point where we don't know
what to believe anymore. And it all starts with this
deceptively simple phrase. "You don't know what you're talking about. "Let me tell you what really happened." People who talk down to you like this are most likely trying to gaslight you. So be careful and always remember. There's a difference
between letting someone tell you their side of the story and letting them feed you lies. Number four, "You're
not making any sense." Whenever you argue with a gaslighter, it's hard to come out on top because they're always going to try and turn the tables on you. "You know you sound crazy, right?" "Can you even hear yourself?" That's a common form of manipulation, tearing someone down so they
can be vulnerable enough to believe them and buy
into their nonsense. Gaslighters are experts at making you feel paranoid and crazy especially when they know
that you're in the right and have no other way to gain
the upper hand in an argument. Number five, "Stop
exaggerating the situation." Are you starting to notice a pattern in the phrases gaslighters often use to try and manipulate you? They usually start with the word you, as in you're the one
who's always in the wrong, you're the one who's mistaken, and you're the one causing the problem, not them, never them. Why? Because gas lighters
will do everything they can to convince you that you're wrong. And they'll often do this by tricking you into thinking that you're
imagining all these problems, just being paranoid, and that your concerns are
all exaggerated or unfounded. Number six, "If anything, "I'm the one who should be mad at you." Remember how we said gaslighters love to flip the situation onto you. Well, this is a simple example of that. They'll often act as if by calling them out and making them take
responsibility for their actions you're the one hurting them. "Why are you mad?" they might ask. They may say things like "I'm the one being wrongfully accused "even though I did nothing wrong. "I'm the victim here, not you." See what we mean? They're deflecting responsibility by manipulating your
perception of the situation and rewriting the narrative. And number seven, "Don't listen
to anything they tell you. "You can't trust anyone but me." Yikes, out of all the words and phrases gaslighters tend to use
when manipulating us, this might be the worst one of all. "Why would you listen to them?" or "You believe them over me?"
are just a couple of phrases a gaslighter will use to try
to alienate you from anyone who sees there's something
wrong and wants to help you. They want you to think that there isn't anyone else
that you can trust but them when the awful truth is
that they're the ones you should have never
trusted in the first place. Have you heard any of these statements or been gaslit by someone? Although a lot of people are
still unfortunately unaware of what gaslighting is or
how dangerous it can be, it's important that we take the steps to educate ourselves enough
to be able to recognize it. If you or anyone you know
has experienced gaslighting for a long time, please do
not hesitate to seek help from a licensed professional. Remember that this video
is meant to be educational and is not intended to diagnose or treat any condition or situation. Did you find this video insightful? Tell us in the comments below. Please like and share it with friends that might find value
in this video as well. Make sure to subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification
bell icon for more content. All the references used are
added in the description below. Thanks for watching, and
we'll see you next time.
