6 Signs Of An Emotionally Abusive Relationship You Shouldnt Ignore | BetterHelp

[Music] so today I want to talk to you a little bit more about signs of mental and emotional abuse this is such an important topic and there are so many different signs that you can learn about that will help you to understand if you or somebody you know might be in one of these abusive relationships I'm dr. Sonya and I'm a licensed clinical psychologist and I've worked with many people who have struggled with their relationships and trying to determine if they should stay or they should go and one of the things that I'm always concerned about is working with people who are in relationships that are unhealthy or abusive and as a therapist I really want to help them to understand and make a good decision about some of the signs they're seeing and support them whether they want to try to set good boundaries in the relationship or whether they want to try to receive help to exit the relationship so today I'm going to talk to you a little bit more about some of these signs in addition to jealousy one of the other things that an abusive partner emotionally abusive partner will do is try to monitor and control who you speak to and when you speak to them and they may do this through going through your phone or your social media or your computer or monitoring who you're spending time with and when you're spending time with these people there's a big difference between concern and control and if somebody wants to monitor every aspect of your life they're probably more controlling than they are concerned about you mind games are a really common tool of people who are emotionally abusive basically what they will do is try to make you deny your own reality so for example they might say something and then when you confront them about what they said whether it was cruel or harsh or untrue they'll deny ever saying it in the first place and this has the effect of keeping you entirely off balance and really doubting your own reality in your own perception another common term for this behavior is gas and if you're with somebody who's gaslighting super important to get help to set some really clear boundaries and decide if this is the type of relationship you want to be in if you're in a long-term partnered relationship with someone who is emotionally abusive you may find that they will exclude you from important family decisions so basically what this does is it puts them in a position of power and leaves you feeling really isolated from the important dynamics of the family it's a great way to control somebody and keep them from having an active voice in their own life in their own choices in addition to excluding you from important family decisions another classic technique of an emotionally abusive person is to control your access to finances either through having you give them your money that you make or if you are at home and you're not working they may only allow you a small allowance and they may monitor every financial transaction that you you make and the reason that they do this is really it's just another form of control and a way to keep you trapped in an unhealthy situation along with control threats are a common technique of an abusive individual basically they will threaten to leave you or divorce you anytime you try to set a boundary or to assert yourself or to express any displeasure with the way that they're treating you another strategy that an abuser will use is they will blame you for their bad behavior so they may say something mean they may do something cruel and instead of taking responsibility for their own actions they will say that somehow you were the cause of that behavior on their part this is a very subtle but powerful tactic to control another person if any of these signs we talked about today resonate with you or if you recognize either yourself or someone else in an emotionally abusive relationship I really encourage you to reach out for help there are many licensed counselors who can basically help you determine if you are in an abusive relationship and if you choose to stay in the relationship help you set boundaries and if you choose to leave the relationship help you with all of the emotions and feelings that will arise around this difficult decision if you liked this video please feel free to subscribe to our YouTube channel where you'll find a lot more content on a variety of mental health topics and if you're interested in learning more about online counseling please click the link to better help comm below [Music] [Music] you [Music]

Channel: BetterHelp

Views: 632,954

Rating: 4.9250846 out of 5

Keywords: emotionally abusive relationship, signs of an emotionally abusive relationship, emotionally abusive relationships, emotional abuse relationship, signs of emotional abuse, abusive relationship, emotional abuse signs

Id: 8vhx2hlko28

Length: 5min 19sec (319 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 30 2018