Iām breaking in! Well, well, well. What do we have here?
A burglar bunny. What do they do it, OāMalley? I donāt know. Itās probably how
he gets his kicks. You criminals make me sick! Iām no criminal. I live here! Iām just throwing a party.
I got locked out. I swear. What about all the stuff you stole? What do you mean? Like that barrel! It says
āProperty of Salty Sea Farmsā. Oh, thatās where I rent me pickles from. - Are you renting the barrel too?
- Wellā¦ no. - Then you bought it?
- No. - Then isnāt that stealing?
- Wellā¦ I, uh... What about this towel from the
Sizzling Spring Sauna? - Umm well, thatāsā¦
- And this Bikini Bell phone. - Well, Iā¦
- And Sandyās hedge clippers. - Ooh, theyāre umā¦
- And Planktonās lawnmower. - Well heā¦
- Even Mrs. Puffās hair curlers. That one was a gift.
Listenā¦ All that stuff is uhā¦ borrowed. [screaming] [crashing] - Patrick! You just ran three red lights!
- So? Youāre supposed to stop. I think the driving genius knows
what heās doing. Weāll take that sicko off your hands. Cops! Thank goodness youāre here.
Take the sicko away! Actually, weāre referring to you, maāam. Public nudity is against the
law in this county. Heāll be driving by tomorrow.
Toodle-loo! What have I done? Everyone will
know that I let him slide through school. Iāll have to move to a new city. Start a new boating school
with a new name. No! Not again. If you canāt do the time,
donāt do the crime. Okay, times up. Now get out. But, but we stole a balloon. Yeah, on Free Balloon Day. [laughing] Squidward Q. Tentacles, Iām placing you
under arrest for impersonating a genius. - Alright you two, youāre under arrest.
- What for? - Unlicensed use of a sitar.
- But my grandma gave me this sitar. It didnāt come with a license. Plankton! Uh, Iām ready? Wait a minute.
Was this band just a front, so you could steal the Krabby Patty
secret formula? What? No!
I was in it for the music, man! Hold it right there! Well, well, well. If it aināt Mrs. Puff. I saw what you did. - I... you did?
- Yeah. Oh please, I didnāt mean to do it!
I swear! Itās too late for swearing, Puff.
The evidence is right here. You littered. - Now come to Krabsy.
- Halt! Patrick Man is on to you! Thief! Stealing is bad! Bad! Fiddle sticks! Reckless drivers.
I loathe reckless drivers. [laughing] Holy sea cow!
That hooligan ran a stop sign! - Stop thief!
- You know that guy? - Hardly, he stole my wallet.
- What? That makes him a dual offender.
Letās get him. Weāve received hundreds of reports of an
excruciating musical disturbance and youāre the only one holding an
instrument. Wait a minute. Iāve never seen this
instrument before in my life. Heās right officer.
Plankton doesnāt even play clar-- There, there laddie. Just let
the legal system run its course. Watch your head. [screaming] Huh, this guyās not half
bad looking for a maniac. Wait a minute, Patrick. Iām the maniac! [screaming] [sirens] Weāll take that as a confession. Am I really gonna defile this
grave for money? Of course, I am! I havenāt the foggiest idea what youāre
carrying on about, SpongeBob. But I donāt have time for it.
Iāve got my own problems. Johnny Law finally caught up to me
for ditching jury duty. Let this be a lesson to you, son. Never ditch! You canāt fire me! Iām not an
executive at all! Iām just a guy who happens to
like sandwiches. So, go ahead! Send me away forever as a corporate spy if you want to. But not before Iāve had my say! Destruction of private property. Oh, and I see here
youāre a repeat offender. Youāre going to real jail. Anything to get out of this game!
Thanks officers! Welcome back. Mr. Krabs has stolen a very important
item from the Oyster. Behold! The Oysterās pearl! [moaning] One too many Goofy Goobers
again aye, Patrick? [moaning] No sir! I couldnāt eat another! Ow! Youāre under arrest! But Iām innocent. No one is innocent! Whoa, things got dark fast. - You sold me!
- No! Bartered is more like it. They keep you, I keep my kneecaps. - Come on, Mack.
- Youāre pathetic! Well, you crossed the county line
three miles back. You maāam, are a parole violator. Letās book him! Wow, you guys are good. Iām the last person I wouldāve suspected, but I was looking for me all the time! Itās the perfect crime! - I donāt think heāll be laughing boy.
- Why, Sir? Because that patty killed him! [screaming] [screaming] - Mr. Krabs what are we gonna do?
- Whatās this 'we' stuff? You fed him the tainted patty. Looks like it's the stony
lonesome for you! - But you told me to give it to him!
- Well you could've talked me out of it! Youāre right, Mr. Krabs. Iām guilty. Iāll never survive in prison.
Theyāll mop up the floor with me! Get a hold of yourself, boy! We gotta get rid of this body
before anyone sees it. We gotta take it out and bury it! Hey you! - Youāre under arrest!
- Arrest? For what? I didnāt even steal
anything this time. Vandalismās a crime too! Well, well, well. If it isnāt the art thief himself.
Drop the spoon. Youāre all under arrest until we
figure this out. What do you mean all?
Iām not under arrest. I, Iā¦ These are idiots.
Theyāre causing a ruckus. I, I want sleep. Mr. Krabs did you get those
ingredients from the trash? Of course not!
That wouldnāt be legal. I intercepted these items on their
way to the trash. You donāt deserve this! [giggling] Huh, litter bugs. This is why I joined the force. Itās the police! Pull it over litterbug! Litter bug? No! Ooh, I got me a runner. - Eh, your turn to chip in, boy.
- Sure. Here you go.
Buy yourself something pretty. Hey! This isnāt money! No, it's even better! This is what
Mr. Krabs pays me with. Mr. Krabs' wacky bucks! Ooh, it's all starting
to catch up with me. Your joyrideās over, punk! No! No, no! What are you doing? Help, help! No, no, please! No, I have a snail to feed! I canāt go
to jail now! This is not a good time! No! Please, please!
Iām not a criminal! Stop, thief! [panting] Looks like this case is all wrapped up. [groaning] - Thank you, Mummy.
- Anytime, sweetie. SpongeBob warned me you were
planning a jailbreak. So, I took the precaution of hiding the
entire Bikini Bottom police force in me safe. Come along, Plankton.
Itās back to jail for you. Uh! Hey, watch where youāre
pointing that thing, Buster. Hey, we can trust Patrick.
Heās my best friend. Well, I canāt take any chances. For all
we know, he could be the strangler. Iām the strangler!
No, I should've known! I gotta turn myself in! [crashing] So, Patrickās the strangler. Gee, you think you know a guy. Under penal code 26-1. Quote, āThe boating instructor is
responsibleā¦ for any minorās delinquent actions
under that teacherās care. Unquote. Iām afraid weāre gonna
have to take you in, madam. You missed one! Ooh, Miss Gristlepuss!
Iām sorry we sell Krabby Patties, but do you really have to send us to jail? Of course I do! You are a
nuisance to my community! You tell āem, honey!
Thatās my girl. This guyās been ka-ra-taed! After all I said about never
using karate for revenge! For shame Squidward, for shame. Looks like heās not worthy of
this belt after all. Thanks for dishonoring o
our trust in you, Squidward. Whatever, Iām still a karate master! - Wow, really you are?
- Yes, I am. Hey, watch your head.
Iād never guess that. And what is that supposed to mean? Oh a, nothing. Just with the rubbery
arms and the doughiness in the midsectionā¦ Okay, already, I get it! What, wait a second. Am I under arrest? You sure are and you have the
right to remain silent. [screaming] Or not silent. What are you thinking? I donāt know what you two are
doing, but it looks illegal. I have a confession to make! Iāll just hold on to this formula
ātil the morning. - Oh but officer, I have more confessions.
- Zip it, kid. I get it, youāre a criminal mastermind. Guilty, yay!
